Thank-you for taking the time to read another story from my often-wacky imagination. This started off as a one and done but I've been informed, that this isn't all of their story.
As always please favorite, rate, comment, and send me some feedback.
I love hearing from everyone!
A shout out to my favorite 'editor' Thank-you for always pre-reading, giving me input and for just being a great friend!
*
The rain was lightly tapping on the roof of the new-to-me pop-up camper. It was far from fresh off the showroom floor. We were born the same year in fact, 1992. Every spare moment of my Fall had been spent cleaning, painting, and updating the inside. Gone was the deep maroon and faux wood grain inside. Now yellows, blues and grays lighten and lifted-up the interior. I joke around that it is my 'she-shed'.
What it really is, is my escape pod. Escape from the world. Escape to my own version of peace. Escape from pain.
Escape back, to who I want to be again.
It currently sat on an electricity only campsite, at a state forest, fifty miles from home. Night two of the thirteen I was scheduled to be here was over. It had rained since about twenty minutes after I pulled in, popped up and set up. I was starting to go stir crazy. I was here to move. To hike. To clear my head and find myself again. Not to sit inside and read and watch movies.
Jumping off my bed, I grabbed the book that was on the small table in the middle of the camper. I had already finished one and was almost done with another. The rain seemed to be tapering off. It would be too wet to hike today, but maybe it would at least be possible to sit outside and read.
I got myself cleaned up then stepped outside, book in hand. The rain had stopped completely, and the sky was already clearing. My book was tossed back inside on my bed, cooking a real breakfast was now priority one. As much as I loved peanut butter and honey sandwiches, it was time for something different.
I went over to the fire ring. Small puddles of rain water peppered the area. Kneeling down, I watched the clouds in the sky move in a bigger puddle for a few moments before moving on with my task. After the fire ring was cleaned out, I grabbed some dry wood and got a fire going. Eggs, bacon and toast were soon in the pan over the flames. My stomach growled impatiently.
As my food cooked, I looked around the area. A few of my neighbors were all doing the same thing. The air was filling with the smells of breakfast.
My food was done cooking and I sat at the picnic table. The open area between all the sites was still wet, but soon was filling up with k**s and adults playing Frisbee. Everyone seemed to have the same desire to move as I did.
I finished eating, cleaned up. Inside, I grabbed my book and sat in my camp chair. I had all the windows unzipped and open in the camper, airing it out. Slowly the sun got higher in the sky and everything was beginning dry up nicely. I made lunch and watched others do the same. The rest of the day was more enjoying the sun and watching everything continue to dry out. I went for a walk along the access road just to stretch my legs before darkness settled over everything.
The trails seemed damp, but dry enough that I should be able to get out on them tomorrow. As long as we didn't get any overnight rain. Back at the site, I got the fire going again and made dinner.
I changed into sweats and moved my chair close to the fire to just enjoy the sun setting and night taking over. Slowly, the sounds of the other people in the area lessened and the noise of nighttime in the woods became more discernible. I sat for what felt like no time but in reality was hours just taking it all in.
Yawning, I stood up to bed the fire for the night when I saw movement out of the corner of my right eye. Looking up, the form of a girl slowly came into focus. She looked about my age. Maybe a little younger, with short wavy blonde hair.
From what I could tell, in the very dim light, she was cute. Very cute. She smiled softly then turned around and went back into her tent. I went back to taking care of the fire then walked inside the pop-up and settled myself in for the night.
**
The sun beaming through the window and the birds singing woke me up. I laid there for a while just enjoying the noise of early morning. Nothing beat waking up to the sounds of nature.
I finally dragged myself out of the pop-up and started the fire. Made some coffee and breakfast. As I was sitting cooking, the girl from the night before came out of her tent. She stood just outside of it, glanced my way, then stretched, revealing her bare midriff. Her belly button was pierced. My eyes lingered longer than appropriate. She didn't seem to mind. Even smiled a little.
A moment later, she was joined by a 6-foot b**st of a man. He dwarfed her as he stood up next to her and pulled her into his arms. I groaned quietly. Oh well, she was nice to look at, at least.
I turned back to cooking my breakfast. My eyes kept wandering over to the cute blonde one site away as she and the b**st puttered around making their breakfast. More than once she caught me watching her. Each time she smiled the same way she had the night before. I needed to stop looking at her, but just couldn't help myself.
I pulled myself away from stealing glances and went inside to get ready to hit the trails. That was why I was here after-all. Not to stare at an unavailable straight girl. I changed, laced up my boots then pulled my straight, dirty blonde hair into a ponytail.
Ten minutes later I exited and locked up the camper then left the area. Not without glancing over to the tent, no sign of the blonde or the b**st.
It was roughly a half mile to the trailhead that was in my plans for the day. I walked along the access road until I located it. Clicking my tracking software on, I started along what would be a nine mile each way out and back hike.
The first mile or so was boring. Not much to see. By mile two I was walking mere feet from the river. I stopped and sat on a rock just above the bank. The white rolling foam that surrounded each rock in the water was dancing its very own ballet. The river was high from the last of the snowmelt. Only the biggest rocks were above the water line. This dance kept me occupied for many minutes.
The urge to move again hit and I got up and started back on the trail. At mile three and a half was the first of the three promised old stone arch railroad bridges. They were built in 1840 according to the literature. I wasn't fully prepared for what stood before me as I rounded the bend. The first bridge had two high arches that plunged deep into the water. I stood there and imagined 19th century steam engines rolling along the immense structure. The tales this structure could tell me if only it was capable of speech.
After taking it in, I continued on the trail as it led up to the top. I walked along it, standing where once powerful engines rode. I turned and looked downriver. The view from this height was breathtaking. Watching the water bend with the earth, picking up power in narrower spots. Twisting and churning, becoming more powerful when needed, and calmer when not, was like watching a magic show put on by Mother Nature herself. I could have stayed there all day. I sat down right at the edge, my feet hanging over into the expanse of free air. I looked straight down a few times, but mostly just stared at the miles and miles of earth before me.
Somewhere within those distant trees was the house I grew up in, the school I worked at. The life I was trying to find my way back to. I had lost myself out there the day my twin brother died.
Every moment of my life had him in it until six months ago. How was I supposed to find myself without him? One step at a time. That's what Jasper, my older brother, had told me. It sounded absurd to me at the time. Now, as I stared through time and space, it was a little less ridiculous sounding.
My feet began to push forward once more. The trail moved away from the river, and into the deeper woods for the next two miles. It spilled me out right in front of the next bridge. One arch for this one. I followed a worn spot off trail, to the right and found myself at the base of the bridge. If the water had been lower, I could have gotten an even better view, but the one I currently had was just fine. I sat down and took out the peanut butter and honey sandwich I made for lunch and ate as I listened to the water power its way by me. The sandwich was extra drippy, and I cleaned my fingers off in the current when it was gone.
The river was narrower here. The foam was dancing wildly, as if in a mosh pit at a music festival. I laid out in the sun as my food settled, watching the billowing clouds roll by. My eyes were threatening to close, and I forced myself to sit up.
I went back up to the trail and stood on the top of the bridge. I could feel the water powering its way to the ocean under me. This view was more trees than river as there was a tight bend just before the bridge. I watched birds in flight over the trees, soaring and gliding in perfect freedom.
A few more miles and the last of the stone arch bridges was in front of me. This one was angled in such a way, with the trail going right across it, that to see it I needed to go down a precarious embankment. It would be reckless to do this while alone.
I extended my ski pole that had been tethered to my bag and used it to clear the leaves in front of me so each step would be a little less dangerous. At one point, the only remotely safe way to continue was to turn around and go half step by half step backwardly climbing down, using the tree roots for footholds. My foot slipped at one point, but I was able to grab a tree root before the rest of my body fell.
Finally, at the bottom, was the best view I had seen all day. I was face to face with the stone. The water right there with me. The grass under my feet was soft and dry. And warm. I once again laid down and when my eyes became heavy, I didn't fight them.
Voices pulled me from my slumber.
"There's someone down there. Oh my, do you think they are okay?"
I could hear the worry as the sound of a feminine voice made its way to my ears. I forced myself to open my eyes and sit up. I looked up at the top of the bridge. The sun was in my eyes so I couldn't make out who or how many people were looking down at me. "I'm fine." My arm waving as I spoke.
The same voice reached my ears again. "Oh, thank goodness. You worried us for a moment."
"I promise, I'm fine. Was just enjoying the river and fell asleep."
"Okay! Well enjoy the rest of your hike."
"You too." The silhouettes moved out of my view and headed back towards the start of the trail. I was in no rush to move, nor did I want to risk running into them on the trail, so I stayed out for another twenty or so minutes before climbing back up to the trail.
Another mile and I came upon a big sign warning not to trespass into CSX property. My tracking software confirmed this was the end of the trail. I turned around and made my way back to the trailhead.
By the time my camper was in my sightline, it was closing in on dinner time. I went inside and grabbed my stuff for the bathhouse. A shower would be perfect before cooking dinner. Upon exiting, the same voice from the bridge hit my ears.
"Hey! Was that you laying in the grass at the base of the bridge?" It was the cute blonde from last night and this morning.
Shit. She was so attractive, now dressed in a skimpy tank top, short shorts and her hair pulled up as much as the length allowed. "Yep. That was me. Sorry I didn't mean to give anyone a scare." My eyes wouldn't stop wandering up and down her exposed skin. There was so much exposed skin to appreciate.
She flashed her soft smile at me just before the b**st came around from the other side of the tent. "Nate, this is who we thought had fallen but was just asleep." She smacked him on his chest as she spoke and for a split second I imagined her hand on my chest. Then shook the image from my head.
That's not why you're out here Bria!
The blonde walked over with her hand outstretched. "Hi! I'm Maya. This is my boyfriend, Nate." She had a smiled plastered on her face. It was a perfect smile, on a perfect face.
I shifted my shower supplies to my left hand and shook her hand with my right. "Hello. I'm Bria. Nice to officially meet you." Her hand was soft. So. Fucking. Soft.
Nate shook my hand next. His was not. I never understood why women wanted such rough hands touching them.
Saying goodbye, I walked up to the modern bathhouse. It was great that this place had such nice facilities. Not every state park did. Inside, I showered, my mind went to that soft hand that had just been shaking mine. Her pierced belly button. That sweet voice. Her tanned legs in those short shorts. Under the hot water I slipped my fingers between my legs. Let myself fantasize about those soft hands.
I walked back to the site, a little less pent up feeling. I went inside, but not before glancing over at the tent. No signs of Maya or the b**st. Inside, I grabbed what was needed to make myself a burger for dinner. Another day or so and a trip into town to resupply my cold food stores would be needed.
Back outside I got the fire going and the grill over the top of it. Soon, a nice fat juicy burger was sizzling. I was pulling the burger off the grill and putting it on a bun when Maya and the b**st walked back from the access road where most of our cars were parked. The b**st had a twelve pack of Corona in each hand. Strictly speaking, alcohol was prohibited here, but I had never seen anyone get in trouble as long as things were kept in check. That seemed a bit excessive and I wondered if they would keep things in check.
Maya waved at me when she noticed me watching them. I waved back, then went back to my burger, hoping to not let on to her that I was enamored with watching her. My eyes kept glancing her way though.
Lettuce, tomato, mayo, and some left-over bacon from this morning and my dinner was ready for me to sit and enjoy. I put a couple extra tomato slices on the plate then cut the burger and dug in. I was hungrier than I realized and entirely too soon the burger, and tomato slices were gone.
The sun was starting to change in the sky. The air was getting a little cooler. I stoked up the fire then cleaned up. Once done, I pulled my chair over to the fire with the intent of spending the rest of the evening just watching the flames dance. I was caught up in the show going on in the fire ring when I heard that voice again. In the seconds between hearing her voice and turning to look at her, my mind had already undressed her.
Not okay Bria.
"Hey neighbor." She was walking over with what looked like supplies to make s'mores. I glanced at her, sweats and a hoodie on just like me, then glanced behind her. No sign of the b**st.
Cautiously, I said hey back. Given that I was already imagining her naked, I wasn't sure having her in my space was a very good idea. Not that I could exactly tell her that. 'Sorry Maya, I'm an extremely lonely and horny lesbian and you look an awful lot like my next mistake.'
Nope.
She stood in front of me now. My eyes nearly level with her chest. She didn't appear to be wearing a bra. There was no way to stop myself from imagining what she looked like under that hoodie. "Wanna share?" She shook the contents in her hands a little as she asked me. That pulled me from my reverie.
I didn't usually eat s'mores, but the company would be nice. I looked past her, expecting the b**st to be right behind her. She gave me the supplies then went back to her site and brought back a chair. Once back, she sat down. Close enough I could smell her. Coconut. I was still expecting to see her boyfriend any second.
"He's passed out cold. He nearly drank a whole twelve pack plus some whisky tonight." Her tone sounded vexed, but she laughed slightly at the end. Her laugh was quiet, understated. Adorable.
She took the s'mores stuff back then proceeded to hand me a marshmallow and a stick. Then two graham crackers and a piece of candy bar. I toasted the marshmallow and assembled my s'more. One bite in and I was flooded with c***dhood memories of sitting around a campfire like this eating s'mores with my parents and brothers. I could almost hear my mother yelling at my older brother as he chased my twin brother around the campfire.
Two more bites and suddenly Maya was leaning over me, her finger was on the skin near my mouth. So many parts of her were currently touching me that I had to hold my breath as she moved. Her eyes caught mine as she wiped something off the skin by my mouth. I almost instinctively turned to suck her finger into my mouth.
Then she was back in her own space. "You had some melted chocolate there." She licked the finger that had just been touching my face as she spoke. My eyes didn't leave her as she did that. All too familiar urges and pulses were assaulting my body. I was trying to figure her out, figure out what she was playing at. If she was playing at anything.
The s'mores were gone and yet she stayed sitting just a very few feet from me as we both watched the fire slowly burn down. "Are you hiking again tomorrow?"
I turned to look at her as I replied. "Probably something short. I need to drive to town and get food." I could wait another day, but I felt like I needed an out and wasn't sure why.
"Nate probably won't even be able to move tomorrow. If you hike and want company let me know." She got up, decided that leaning over me again and giving me a small goodbye hug was a thing and walked back over to her tent. I watched her hips move with each step. Just before she unzipped the tent she looked my way and smiled again. Fuck she was adorable. And nice.
A deep sigh escaped my mouth. I briefly contemplated packing up and leaving tomorrow. I didn't have anywhere to go though. Well, I could go home, but I wasn't ready for the memories that lived there. Not yet. Hopefully by the end of summer I would be.
I was trying to figure out exactly what had happened. The s'mores. The finger. Her smile and now an offer to hike. I sat contemplating it all until the fire was nothing but embers, then settled in to sleep.
**
The sun and birds woke me again. I didn't lay enjoying it for long, my stomach insisted I get up and get cooking.
Outside, I got the fire up and going. Then started cooking eggs. I saw Maya coming out of her tent. She did the same stop and stretch as the morning before. I did the same looking at her bare belly, then the rest of her. For a little too long. Then she looked my way, catching me watching her, and waved. I waved back then put my attention back on the eggs so they wouldn't burn.
"Morning."
I looked up and she was sitting down at my picnic table. I was thrown off a little by her suddenly being in my space again but managed to reply. "Morning."
"Nate is still out cold. This is why I don't drink. He's not going to want to do anything today but sit around this site." She groaned as she spoke. "That smells great."
I was putting my eggs and bacon on a plate. I sighed silently, "Want some?" I had plenty of eggs I could easily make more. Maybe she would get a little food on her face and I could clean it off for her.
Stop Bria.
"That's your breakfast. I don't want to take your food." She flashed that soft smile again. She was adorable and she knew it.
I tried to keep myself centered, then handed her the plate. "I can make more." I put more eggs in the pan before she could refuse the plate of food. A few minutes later, I sat down across from her at the picnic table. She didn't start to eat until I did. I found that sweet. There was likely no meaning behind it, except for the one I was creating in my head.
We ate in silence, then she thanked me for breakfast. "So, want company on the trails today?" Her soft smile was much wider now. She had big hazel eyes that got a little smaller when she smiled like that.
"Um." Every fiber of my being wanted her to come hike with me. My mind was telling me to tell her no.
"I promise, I'm a decent hiker." She was flashing that smile again.
I should say 'no thanks I hike alone'. She was so fucking tempting sitting there though. She was nice. And hot, and sweet. And had a giant boyfriend. "Sure!" It would be nice to not be alone. It could also be dangerous in all the ways I preferred lately.
"Awesome! I'll go get ready." She got up from the picnic table and started to walk away. "This is going to be a great day Bria." And then she hit me with that soft smile again.
I couldn't move right away. I was supposed to be out here clearing my head. Getting myself back to being responsible and back to making good decisions. Not taking hot straight girls on hikes alone. I shook my head at myself.
Don't fuck up Bria.
Eventually, I got up, cleaned up then went inside and got changed. Back outside, I put what was left of the fire out and made sure my bag was set. I didn't plan a long hike. Briefly, I contemplating changing plans to a longer more secluded hike.
Stop it Bria!
A few minutes of arguing with myself later, Maya came bouncing over. She looked the part of a hiker so that was a relief. Both for the actual hike and my ability to stay focused on the trail and not her. "Ready?" She had a baseball cap on, and if it was possible, she was even more adorable now.
Behave Bria.
I nodded my head. We walked side by side to the access road then about a half of a mile south. This trail was a four-mile loop. "There's some decent elevation on this are you okay with that?"
"Yeah. Are there any views?"
"I've never done this one, but the All Trails reviews say there is a nice vista."
"Cool."
I clicked on my tracking software then we started out. I was worried she would be a talker as we hiked but so far, she wasn't. It was nearly half way through the five miles before I heard her voice.
"Mind if we sit here for a while?"
There was a small beaver pond on our left and we had come upon a large rock. She climbed up on it and sat down, not waiting for my answer.
I didn't bother to say anything, just made my way to the other side of the rock and sat down too. A few other hikers walked by as we sat. We nodded but didn't speak as they passed us.
Thin wispy fog was covering the water where the sun was hitting it. The surface was dotted with lily pads. Birds were gliding over the trees in the distance. Neither of us spoke for a long time. Then she got up. "Ready?"
I nodded, got off the rock and we continued on. Not far from the pond was the vista I had read about. It wasn't a perfectly uninhibited view, but it was very pretty. I made a mental note to come back here in the fall when the view would be even better.
She sat down after taking it in for a few moments. Didn't ask me if it was okay, which I liked. I was as much hiking with her as she was hiking with me. I was okay with whatever. We stayed there for a few minutes then she stood up and started back on the trail.
Overall, I was surprised at how little Maya talked while we hiked. It was a trait I could respect, a lot.. A few hours after we started out on the trail, we were back at the beginning and making our way back to our campsites.
"You weren't k**ding about the elevation Bria. My ass is going to feel that tomorrow." She was laughing. I was imagining feeling her ass.
I joked with her, "I warned you!" We were laughing like old friends.
Nate was outside when we rounded the bend into the camping area. Maya looked at me. "Thanks for the hike Bria. I really enjoyed it." She gave me another small hug, then walked away and towards Nate, who swept her up into a much bigger hug and a kiss. I had to look away.
I unloaded my stuff, ate lunch inside the pop-up to avoid the potential of her coming over again, and then changed into street clothes. I came back outside and saw Maya had changed too. She was in a different tank top and short shorts, at their fire cooking. "Hey Bria! Want lunch?" Her smile was huge, her eyes smaller. I didn't see the b**st.
"Thanks. I already ate. Heading out for a few. Enjoy the afternoon."
She waved and I waved back. I drove to town but couldn't get the image of her in those short shorts out of my head.
**
The drive to town and getting supplies took me a little over an hour. When I got back to the state forest and my site, I loaded the cold food into the very small fridge. I should only need one more trip in to town before moving on to the next place I planned to camp.
After changing into a t-shirt and shorts, I grabbed my book and went outside. It was too warm to bother starting a fire if I wasn't going to be cooking. I sat out in the sun and read. Occasionally the voices of the rest of the campers broke through my concentration, but mostly, I lost myself in the pages of the book.
"Bria!" I was jolted out of my book with the sound of Maya calling my name. I wondered how long they would be here, how long would I have to be nice all while wanting to do less than nice things to her. Then I felt guilty because she really was nice, and I was glad we had met. I reminded myself it was possible to be friends with a girl I was also attracted to. Especially when that girl was straight. Seven months ago, none of this would have been an issue. Liam would have stopped me before the first time I imagined her naked. I missed my conscience.
The quiet get away I had craved was becoming louder than I intended, yet I couldn't help but engage with her. "Hey Maya."
She was over to my space in a flash. "Thanks for the hike this morning. It was nice. Nate is always in such a rush; I never get to just enjoy everything."
"No problem."
She sat down at the picnic table like she owned it. "What'cha reading?"
I showed her the cover, 'Tell it to the Bees'.
"Never heard of it." She reached for it to read the back. I handed it over like I had known her forever, not for two days. She handed it back to me. "Sounds good." There wasn't much on the back cover that would give away the real deeper storyline.
"It is." I was nearly done; it was a pretty decent book with a love story I could relate to and yearned for in my own life. The only way I would get anything like what was in this book was to straighten my life back out.
She continued to sit there. I glanced over at their site. No way was Nate still sleeping.
She followed my eyes then said. "He's out on a hike."
"Oh."
"Yeah, I told him I already went while he was busy being hung over, so I was good for today." She continued to sit there.
I smiled at her. She smiled back.
"So, is that what you do when you camp? Hike and read?" Her tone wasn't anything but curiosity.
"Mostly. I have a TV inside, so occasionally I'll watch a movie, especially if it's been raining and I'm stuck inside."
Her face perked up at that. "Oh. That's nice. Maybe we will get lucky and it will rain again. I'd love to watch a movie. Would be better than watching Nate get drunk or watching him sleep."
She just invited herself to watch a movie. I looked at her. "He's a good guy, just has a stressful job so he comes out here and de-stresses."
My look hadn't been about Nate, it was about her wanting to watch a movie with me. I didn't clarify that.
"Ah." He sounded more like a douche than a 'good guy' but whatever. Wasn't my problem. My only problem, currently, was wishing she would leave, and wishing she would stay. Wishing it would rain and I could offer that movie.
"So. What do you do for a living?" She was sitting with her knees pulled up to her chest now.
"I'm a teacher."
"Oh. Cool. So, you get the whole summer off?"
"More or less."
"Do you camp all summer?"
I didn't usually, but this summer was different. "Most of it yes." She didn't need to know why I was spending most of the break alone in the woods.
"What do you teach?"
"High school history." As much as teenagers drove me crazy sometimes, I loved teaching. I was lucky enough to have landed a position at a private school right out of college, my last name helped pave the way no doubt. The last half a year had put my job in danger, but I was still there with no intentions of leaving if I didn't have to. I was working on my masters, and my life, so I could stay.
"Cool." She was still sitting with her knees pulled up. Her shorts were so short I could see more of her legs than was good for me. That didn't stop me from stealing looks as much as I could.
It was getting later, and my stomach was letting me know it was time to start the fire and cook dinner. The b**st still wasn't back, and I felt bad for Maya just sitting there. "Hungry?"
Her face perked up as she hesitantly nodded yes.
"Burger? Or I have hot dogs, or a couple steaks." I hoped she picked a burger. Those were cheaper. I also hoped her boyfriend didn't come back while I was cooking. I had no desire to cook for him.
"A burger would be great. Wow, thank you Bria." Her smile was wide again. Her eyes got smaller but brighter when she smiled that way.
I got up and got the fire going. She watched me. Intently. I was trying not to be distracted by her. It was barely working. I went back into the pop-up and came out with the burgers then the rolls and cheese. "Do you like tomato or anything else on yours?"
"You don't have to go all out. I'm fine with it plain."
"Well, I'm not. I like everything on mine so it will be inside if you want some." I didn't like leaving food outside waiting for me to cook, so I always put my stuff together inside. I wondered how we would both fit inside the non-kitchen inside. It would force me to be closer to her.
"Okay. Is there anything I can do to help?"
"Yeah actually, can you bring me the cheese? Do you want cheese on yours? I have Cheddar and Muenster on that plate. "
She handed me the plate I had set on the chair. "Either is fine with me." Our hands touched as she did. I paused for the briefest of moments with the contact.
I put cheddar on one and Muenster on the other. We could figure the rest out inside. After she handed me the plate, she sat down on the ground next to where I was sitting cooking. I wanted to tell her she could bring over a chair, but I didn't want her to move. Every few moments the breeze would carry the scent of her shampoo, or body lotion, something, to me. Coconut. My mouth was watering and it wasn't because of the burgers cooking on the flame.
"How do you like yours cooked?"
"Well."
"Same as mine. Easy enough."
It wasn't long and the burgers were done, and Maya handed me the plate with both buns on it. Without being asked. "Thanks."
"No problem."
I handed one back to her, then opened up the pop-up door. She followed me inside. It wasn't very big, but it was just me using it, so I didn't need big.
"Wow. Did you do this yourself?" Maya was looking around the interior. Deep blue cabinets. Yellow patterned seat covers. Grey for the beds. The privacy curtains were the same yellow as the seats. It was bright, airy and cheerful. I loved it. String lights went around the perimeter of the ceiling, which was a faux tin tile now.
"Most of it. I had some help with the wiring and such." My memory went back to Liam helping me with that. Then like a low cloud in a stiff breeze the memory was gone.
"It's really pretty in here."
"Thanks." It felt odd to share this space with someone. Liam was the last person besides me, in here.
I already had tomato, lettuce and onions cut up. I watched as she took some of each and put it on her burger. I did the same. We were elbow-to-elbow as we fixed our burgers. Then I added mayo and put ketchup on my plate. She gave me a quizzical look.
"I like to dip it in the ketchup."
"Huh. Never thought of that." She proceeded to put some ketchup on her plate as well. I cut mine into four pieces. She cut her's in half. I handed her a napkin and went to open the door. "Wanna eat inside? It's buggy outside."
It was always buggy outside, but she was already moving towards sitting at the table. I put the unused condiments in the fridge, grabbed a bag of chips and sat on the other side of her. I put some chips on my plate and offered the bag to her. She put some on her own.
I felt like I needed to make conversation, so I asked her what she did for work.
"I'm an EMT."
"Wow. That's awesome." I wasn't expecting that answer. I wasn't sure what answer I was expecting or why this wasn't it though. "What does Nate do?"
"He's an EMT too."
So, he had a stressful job and drank to let off steam. She has the same job and doesn't. I found this very telling of their personalities. "Ah."
We ate in silence. I was done first but sat while she finished. When she did, I got up and took both our plates and cleaned up. Then I opened the door to head back outside. She hesitated before following me.
The sky was changing, getting darker. "Looks like rain."
I looked up and saw all the clouds moving in. "I think you're right."
As I finished speaking, Nate walked back into their site. Maya noticed him a few moments before she reacted. "Well, I better get back to our site. Maybe I'll see you later?" She didn't sound thrilled to head back to her own campsite, but her soft smile was back. She gave me another gentle hug before she walked away.
"I'm here for a few more days so I'm sure you will." I smiled back then watched her walk over to the b**st. I averted my eyes before I had to see him hug or kiss her.
The sky was getting darker. I stoked up the fire. Then went inside and changed into sweats and a hoodie, moved my chair and sat down next to the fire. The rain was coming, so I was staying out here until I couldn't any longer.
The sounds of night were filling the air. I was lost in the melody, so lost, I didn't notice someone entering my site. "Hey, in the mood for s'mores?" I heard the telltale sounds of her shaking the ingredients as she had done before.
I smiled before I even opened my eyes. "Hi Maya. Sure."
My eyes were opened, and she was smiling at me. Hoodie and sweats for her again too. She had her chair in her other hand, set it up and sat down. Stick, marshmallow, crackers and a candy bar. The first bite flooded me with memories again. Liam and Jasper. My parents. Happier days. Easier days.
"You okay Bria?" She was squinting her eyes as she looked at me. That made them a different small when she smiled. Did she know how sweet her smile was?
"Yeah. S'mores just take me back to my c***dhood."
"Yeah. They taste like innocence. And fun. And freedom."
I had never thought of them that way. I couldn't help but agree. There was none of her reaching over to wipe anything off my mouth tonight. I looked but there was nothing to clean off hers either. She was done with hers before I thought that I could have easily pretended to clean something. She wouldn't have known.
Dammit Bria.
We watched the fire together for a few minutes before she decided to go back to her site. Another small hug from her tonight. This one lasted a little longer than the one last night. I closed my eyes after she walked away, trying to hold on to the feeling of her pressing into me just a little longer.
I went inside when the fire died down. I hadn't really looked at my phone since I got here except to track my hikes. A few messages were waiting for me. Almost one each day from my older brother.
Jasper- Just checking on you
Jasper- I hope things are going okay
Jasper- Bria
Jasper- You've been gone for days Bria. I'm getting worried but since you wouldn't tell me where you were going I can't show up and make sure.
Jasper- Okay, well I hope that you are finding whatever you went into the woods to find. Please let me know you are okay.
I clicked reply.
Me- I'm fine. Haven't found it yet but getting closer. I'll touch base in a few days.
I was about to silence the phone when Jasper messaged me back.
Jasper- Okay sis. Love you. Be safe. Please
Me- Love you too
**
It rained the whole night and was still raining when I woke up. I sighed. I wasn't against rainy hikes, but they weren't my favorite either.
I put my raincoat on and went outside, turned my propane stove on and started cooking breakfast under the awning. It was just about done, when I heard my name. I turned to see Maya walking my way, doing her best to avoid the small puddles along the way. A smile spread across my face despite my best efforts not to let it.
"Hey!" She was under the awning now.
"Hi Maya. How are you this morning?" I was putting my breakfast on a plate. "Want some eggs?"
"Thanks, I already ate." She sat down at the picnic table. "I'm feeling that hike yesterday." She laughed as she rubbed her behind. I almost dropped the plate of food. It took me a moment to be able to function and sit down at the picnic table.
I was glad one side of it was under the awning, it forced me to sit down next to her because the other side was getting dripped on. I smelled the coconut on her again. The urge to lean closer to her was strong. I had to be stronger.
"Nate is passed out again." Her voice sounded less cheerful than it had.
"I'm sorry." This guy really sounded like a selfish douche-canoe. My breakfast was almost gone. I wanted to go take a shower and see if the rain was going to end at some point. I felt bad having to ask her leave though. I couldn't imagine sitting in a tent watching him sleep off his night of drinking. They had a canopy, so maybe she would sit outside. I couldn't let her sit there along all day could I?
"Thanks."
Her face wasn't bright like I had gotten used to over the last few days.
"I'm going to go take a shower. " I paused.
"Oh. Okay I'll leave." She started to stand up.
I didn't like the way her voice sounded. What came out of my mouth next was a direct reaction to that. "Wait. I wasn't done. If you want to watch a movie when I get back, we can."
She sat back down, and her face lit up. "Really? Are you sure?"
I stood up to clean up from breakfast. "Absolutely". A wider smile spread across my face.
"Awesome!" She jumped up and gave me a hug. I was utterly unprepared for this much bigger, tighter hug than she had given prior me and stood there unable to react. "I'll come back when you're done."
"Uh. Okay." Was all I could manage. I watched her bound back over to their site. She went inside the tent. I still hadn't moved. My nose was filled with her coconut scent. I had to shake my head to get myself moving again. Why had I just invited her inside to watch a movie?
Shit.
Inside, I gathered my stuff for a shower, stuffed it under my raincoat and made my way to the bathhouse. I allowed myself a release under the hot water. Maybe now the attraction to her would be easier to deal with. How had I let this girl into my space so much?
I was barely under the awning when Maya was walking over. She had a bag of salt-n-vinegar chips in one hand. The left side of my smile turned up. Those were my favorites. Her smile was big enough to chase away the rain clouds. I hoped it didn't. Then, I got mad at myself for wanting her to come inside and watch a movie. I took a deep breath as she got closer.
"Hey. I left Nate a note in case he wakes up but told him not to bother us, that I'll come back when the movie is done." Her eyes were so small because her face was filled with the biggest smile I had seen on her face.
Not to bother us eh.
I let that stew in my brain for a second then said hello. "Hi Maya." I opened the door, left my wet shoes outside and went inside, she followed. I put my shower supplies away then proceeded to start breaking down the table into a seating area. She started helping, chatting away the whole time. She was really easy to like.
I grabbed a few pillows from the extra bed and tossed them down, then went over to the TV and grabbed a few movies. I handed them to her, "You can pick." I grabbed a bowl for us to put the chips in and set it down next to Maya.
She took the stack and looked through them carefully. Then she handed them all back to me but one. "This one."
I looked at what she picked. 'Ready Player One.' One of my favorites. I couldn't help but smile. "Good choice. Have you seen it?"
"Nope, but I like sci-fi stuff." She sat down, knees up to her chest, back pushed into the pillows.
And I like you Maya.
Shit.
I took the movie after looking at her for a little too long and put it in the blu ray player. I debated if I should turn off the lights. I did simply because they glared on the screen. Or at least that was what I was telling myself.
I sat down in the area between Maya and the end of the seating area. Keeping as much space between as I could. She smiled at me as I sat deep into the pillows.
"Ready?"
She nodded her head. I clicked play and the movie began. Twenty minutes in, we both reached for a chip at the same time and our hands collided. I didn't pull mine back right away. She didn't either. I kept my eyes on the movie. A few minutes later it happened again. Again, neither of us pulled our hands back right away.
The third time it happened, I turned my head just a little and she was looking at me, with that same soft smile on her face. I smiled slightly back at her. I didn't reach for another chip though. Being this close to her was hard enough, never mind whatever this was that was going on. I didn't have a lot of trust in myself to behave, to not cross a line that she didn't want crossed.
The movie went on. I realized too late she had moved the bowl of chips. Then moved herself to fill the space that it had taken up. She was now mere inches from me. The smell of coconut filled my nose. The pulses and pangs of desire that I knew entirely too well hit me. Hard.
More of the movie passed as we sat there. I was hyper aware of every breath she took, every time she shifted or moved in the slightest. I was convinced she was now even closer to me. I felt her hand alongside mine and knew she was. I resisted the urge to look at her. To move my hand. To run my pinky along her skin.
What was she doing? Just being friendly? Nothing else. I hadn't told her I was gay. I didn't always 'look the part' either, at least as far as stereotypes went.
She was just a friendly person. That was all this was. She was comfortable with me and this was her. This was who she was. That had to be it.
Her hand didn't move, nor did mine. I went back to focusing on the movie. Some of my favorite scenes were coming up, when scenes from The Shining were used. I wondered if she got spooked easily.
My question was answered soon enough. She did. She was now as close to me as possible without being part of me. I let her be. Wanted to put my arm around her, pull her close. I didn't. The movie went on. It was getting closer to the end of it. She hadn't moved any closer, nor moved away from me.
I loved the last half hour of this movie, so I was intently focused on the television.
"Maya!" Suddenly a deep voice broke through the air. I nearly jumped.
"What the fuck." Came out of Maya's mouth. She sat up, walked to the door and opened it. I paused the movie. "Nate I wrote you a damn note. The movie isn't over! Seriously go back to the tent I'll be back when it's over!" She sounded different than she had up to this point. Mad. "Unreal." She was shaking her head when she shut the door. She sat back down. "I'm sorry."
Me too.
I looked at her as she moved almost back the way she had been sitting before Nate interrupted us. I really didn't know what to say to her. I wanted to put my hand back where it had been, but I couldn't. The movie was almost over anyways.
The credits rolled and neither of us moved. The screen was black before Maya moved to get up. She looked at me, then at the door. Stood up. I took a deep breath and stood up too. "Thanks for the movie Bria." She turned towards the door, opening it slowly. "Maybe it will rain again." She smiled as she turned around.
I nodded slightly and watched her walk out. It felt like an opportunity had been lost. One we wouldn't get back. I really disliked Nate in this moment.
Slowly, I moved the cushions and put the table back up. I made myself some lunch and sat down to eat. The rain had stopped, but I wasn't in the mood to go outside. After my lunch was gone, I grabbed my book and crawled onto my bed and pulled the blankets over. I didn't even open the book, just laid there for a few minutes before my eyes closed.
I woke up a few hours later. Outside, the rain had stopped fully, and the sun was out. My eyes went to Maya's site. I didn't see either her or Nate as I walked up to the bathhouse.
The ground was still wet but not flooded, which I was glad for. I decided to take a walk along the access road and up to the pond at the top of the road. Other people were doing the same thing. I got a few 'hello' and 'enjoy the day' from various people walking by.
At the pond, I sat on the top of a picnic table and stared out at the water. Time spun along around me as I sat until the sun was setting.
My stomach was getting angry with me, forcing me to get up and make my way back to my site. I started the fire and made myself a few hot dogs. Was just putting them on buns when Maya and the b**st walked back into the area. She waved but didn't speak. I waved back and put my attention back on my dinner.
My food gone, and everything cleaned up, I settled in by the fire to watch night descend.
"Bria. You okay?"
"Huh?" I turned my head and Maya was sitting at my picnic table. Where had she come from?
"You were totally zoned out. Are you okay?" She had stuff for s'mores next to her. This was becoming a thing.
I shook my head. "Yeah. Was just lost in the flames." And in my memories. Liam's face was in the flames.
She picked the s'mores ingredients up shaking them and smiled. "Want?"
I chuckled. "Sure."
"Sweet." She handed me the stuff, then went and got a chair and sat it down next to me. She lowered herself into it then took the stuff back. A few minutes later we were both eating melty yumminess.
"I have had more s'mores in the last few days than I've had in the last decade."
She looked at me like I had said the most outlandish thing ever. "Really?
"Really." All of a sudden I felt weird. Like I shouldn't have said that.
"Wow. I can't imagine." She continued to look at me like that. "Being an adult sucks enough, I need s'mores to remind me to have fun once in a while."
I pondered that, then asked her for the stuff to make a second one. She laughed. I smiled. We sat there eating, talking and watching the fire until the flames died down.
We were almost exactly the same age; her birthday was a week before mine. She was an only c***d. I steered the conversation away from talking about my siblings. We grew up two towns apart. She and Nate had been together for nearly two years. I didn't tell her I thought he was a douche. I knew I was biased and didn't want to cause any issues.
I liked her, more than just being attracted to her. That part was my issue. I liked her as a person, a friend. Even though I had come here to be alone, I was glad so much of my time wasn't being spent that way. The events during the movie still didn't make total sense to me, but I also knew it was highly likely I had blown it all up in my head. It wouldn't be the first time.
As the flames died down Maya started yawning. "Well, I better get some sleep. See ya tomorrow?"
"I'll be around." I planned to hike early but didn't need to tell her that.
"Good! See you Bria." She gave me yet another hug. My arms didn't want to let her go.
"Sleep well Maya."
She walked off into the darkness. The zipper on her tent told me she had made it. I made certain the fire was set for the night and went inside and to bed. Sleep took its time finding me and my dreams were filled with a certain blonde with the sweetest smile I knew.
***
The ground beneath my feet was solid. The trail was not well-used but, was well marked, so following it was not a problem. I hadn't seen another human since veering off a better-known trail four miles ago. Six miles into the hike that had begun before daybreak and I was walking along the crest of the mountains. The views were breathtaking.
A few miles later, sitting on a sun warmed rock, eating my peanut butter and honey sandwich, I listened to the sounds of the mountain. Memories of Liam filled the empty spaces and soon tears were flowing from my eyes. I wasn't even aware I was crying until a tear splashed on my hand. I hadn't cried since his death. I had done everything but cry. Yelled, screamed, hurt. Hurt myself. Hurt others. But until this moment, tears had refused to find me.
Time meant nothing as I sat there. Six months of grief finally broke through the stone wall I had built up. I was exhausted. Mentally and emotionally, when I got off the rock and started making my way off this trail. It was another two miles before I came upon the cross over trail and started looping back towards the first trail. Hours after I had begun, I was back at the campsite.
Inside, I downed a water then gathered my stuff for a shower. On my way up to the bathhouse I heard my name. Maya.
"Hi Maya." I tried to keep walking, but she was approaching me.
"Hey." Her smile faded as she got closer. "Are you okay?" She was scrutinizing me.
I inhaled deeply before I answered her. I wasn't okay, but I hadn't been okay in six months. This was a different not okay than that. "I'm fine. Just tired. Long hike."
"Oh. Are you sure?" She had her hand on my arm.
"I'm sure Maya. I'm also stinky, I really need to go take a long hot shower."
"Okay."
I didn't linger.
Inside the shower the heat worked to relax me. I felt better as I walked back to the camper. No sign of Maya when I passed by her tent.
Inside, I made my usual peanut butter and honey sandwich, then grabbed my book. I was torn between just staying in here and avoiding the potential of seeing her and going outside to read in the sun and fresh air. Fresh air won. The weather was gorgeous, and I got caught up watching a group of teenagers playing frisbee.
They were so carefree. They reminded me of my students, the ones I had not done right by during the second half of the year. New determination to get myself back to who I was washed over me. I was a damn good teacher. I owed my students, and myself, better.
I pulled my eyes away from the frisbee players and put them on the pages of my book. I didn't stop reading until my stomach began protesting its emptiness.
I didn't feel like cooking tonight, so inside, I fixed myself a big bowl of cereal. Sitting down at the picnic table, my eyes went up to the stars. The night was clear and so many stars were visible. I watched them as my cereal bowl slowly emptied.
It bother me when I realized I was genuinely disappointed that Maya hadn't come over with a smile and stuff for s'mores.
Inside, I crawled into my bed, my favorite fleece blanket wrapped around me, my eyes closing, as my head settled firmly into the pillow. Another night where a certain blonde stared in my dreams.
***
The next day was spent much the same way. I was up and on a trail by dawn. Miles and hours later I walked back into my campsite. Maya was outside her tent this time. As soon as she spotted me, she was walking towards me.
"Hey Bria!" Her smile lit up her face, making her eyes nearly disappear.
"Hi Maya." I tried to put on my best smile so she wouldn't ask me if I was okay again. Tears had found me on my hike, and I worried they showed on my face still.
She got closer and paused.
Please don't say anything.
"How was your hike?" Her face wasn't wearing a smile, but a look of concern. It filled her eyes and told me that wasn't what she wanted to say.
"Good. I'm going to go shower."
"Okay. Well. I'll be around if you want to talk or anything."
"Thanks Maya."
After my shower, the only thing I wanted was a nap. I made a sandwich, noting that my food was only going to last another day or two at the most. I needed to do a load of laundry too. I knew what the next day would look like for me. Right now, it was nap time.
"Why are you always such an ass? Don't fucking touch me!"
Loud voices startled me from my sleep. I shook the sleepy cobwebs from my head. Was that Maya?
"Why are you such a bitch?" That sounded like Nate. What the hell was going on?
"Because you are a fucking jerk. Have another beer asshole."
"Don't bother coming back over here tonight!" Nate again.
A moment later there was a knock on my door. "Bria." It was Maya. I got up, still not fully awake, and opened the door. It was dusk outside. I had slept the afternoon away.
She looked a mess. I stepped aside and let her in. No questions asked. She sat down at the table. I sat across from her. She didn't say anything for a very long time. I didn't try and force her to.
Finally, she made a sound like she wanted to speak. Her eyes were down, hands fidgeting. She started and stopped several times before words made their way out of her mouth. "I wish he wouldn't drink so much. He's such an ass when he does." Her voice was flat. Sad.
He was a total douche-canoe as I suspected. Who did that to someone? Was this the first time he had?
She didn't make eye contact, didn't lift her eyes off the surface of the table. I was not good in these situations. I had never been the type to comfort other people when they were going through shit. What should I say? Or do? I wanted to move and hold her but stayed put. Would I just be doing that because I was attracted to her, or would it be to actually comfort her?
Instead of making a move, I just sat there across from her. Her eyes were still down, staring at her hands, or the table, I wasn't certain. I heard something outside the camper. Then heard it again. It was a thudding that I couldn't figure out.
"What the hell?" I got up and opened the door. There was a suitcase, a backpack and a few pairs of shoes in front of my step. I looked across the way and the tent Maya had been staying in was gone. That fucker had ditched her! "Maya." I turned slowly and she lifted her eyes to mine.
She stood up, looked out the door. "Motherfucker!" She wasn't sad sounding now, she was pissed. "I'm gonna kill him!" She stormed out the door, ran over to where their tent had been. Then I watched as she ran to the access road. She was back a moment later. "He's actually gone." Her voice was a combination of sad and angry now. She walked back inside the pop-up and sat back down at my table.
"I can drive you home if you need me to. Wait, do you live with him?" If she did that was going to be horrible.
She looked at me. "No, thank God." She got quieter. "He shouldn't be driving. He drank way too much and hadn't eaten much today."
Speaking of eating, I hadn't had dinner and my stomach was letting me know it. Would it be rude for me to get up and make myself food? I was not a nice person when I went too long without eating. I was fairly certain the term hangry was coined for me. "Have you had anything to eat since lunch Maya?"
She shook her head no. "Okay, let me cook us dinner and then we can figure the rest of this out okay?"
"Okay."
I went into the fridge, grabbed the steaks and the last of my eggs and asked if she liked steak. She did, which was good because it was that or hot dogs, of which I only had two left. I started the propane stove and while those started to cook Maya made us each a small salad. Before long we were both back at the table and eating.
"Thanks Bria." She was quiet again.
"Of course, Maya." It wasn't like I was given much choice. She came here, she was ditched, what else could I do?
I wouldn't have turned her away no matter what. It was just a matter of keeping my motives pure.
We were both done eating. I stood to clean up. Made myself busy with that for a few minutes. She stayed sitting at the table. I was done and sat down. "So. Where do you live?" I was prepared to drive her wherever she needed.
She hesitated. "Do you. Um. Do you think maybe I could? Um. I could just stay here tonight?"
It was my turn to hesitate. Her, sleeping here. Would that be a good idea? What if everything I thought was all wrong. What if watching that movie had been purely innocent? And the s'mores? She had a boyfriend. A big giant asshole of one, but one, nonetheless. I knew this was just a friendship situation. She just got abandoned by her boyfriend and needed to clear her head. There was nothing more to this. At least for her.
"Sure." I was answering her without allowing my brain any input. I had an extra bed. She would be on the other side of the camper. It wasn't a big deal. I could drive her home tomorrow. Or maybe she had someone who could come get her.
"Thanks Bria. I'm gonna grab my stuff if that's okay."
"Of course, it is." The ass had just left it tossed outside.
Jerk.
She brought the bags inside and put her shoes on the milk crate mine were outside. She stood for a minute unsure where to put her stuff.
"You can have that bed." I was pointing across the camper. My bed was on this side. Not that it really mattered, they were the same. But this side had my pillows and blankets and just was...mine.
Her soft smile was back. Again, the urge to hold her came over me. Instead, I told her I was going to the bathhouse before settling in for the night.
"Oh, wait a second and I'll come too." She searched through her bag and produced a toothbrush and what looked like pajamas. "Ready."
We walked together up to the small hill. We both took care of whatever we needed to, then walked back to the pop-up together. As we passed what had been her campsite she muttered, "asshole." I couldn't help but agree.
Inside, I asked her if she wanted to watch another movie before we settled in. It wasn't super late, and I had slept half the afternoon away but for some reason I was still tired. "I'm actually beat, so I wouldn't mind just sleeping."
I set her up with a few blankets, glad that I had a tendency to hoard them. "Night Bria."
"Good night Maya."
I had my book in my bed with me and a small reading light so I wouldn't disturb her. I rolled onto my side, my back towards the interior of the camper. I read for a while then rolled over. Maya was asleep. I could barely make out her form on the other bed but could hear her rhythmic breathing.
My eyes were getting heavy as I listened to her breathing and they gave into sleep easily. She didn't visit my dreams.
Morning came. Not remembering that I wasn't alone, I startled awake with the noise coming from inside the camper with me. A stream of profanities flew out of my mouth as I sat up.
Maya was sitting at the table with a bowl of cereal and she started giggling as I remembered she was there, and then as I realized what had just come out of my mouth.
I took a deep breath and apologized.
"No, that was adorable. Who knew you had a mouth like that? And I'm sorry, I tried not to make noise."
I sat down across from her. "You don't need to be sorry. You have a right to eat."
"Well it is your food. I should have waited for you to wake up."
"Don't be ridiculous." I was fixing myself a bowl of cereal. There was just enough milk left for it. I really had to get to a store before the day was over. "I told you that you could stay, which means I knew you would have to eat breakfast. No way you needed to wait for me." I sat back down across from her.
"Thanks again Bria." Her smile wasn't as bright as it had been.
Stupid douche-canoe boyfriend.
"Of course."
I wanted to ask her what her plan was. Was I bringing her home? She lived ten miles further away than I did, but I would bring her. Or did she want to use my phone and call someone? Would the asshole show up here and would she go back to him?
We both finished eating and cleaned up. "So, what's your plan?" I tried to pick the right words, so she would know I would help in whatever way I could.
"Um." She was looking down, like she was trying to figure out what to say.
"I have to go to the store for food today. And to do a load of laundry. If you want me to bring you home, I can do that. If you want to call someone, I have a phone." I wasn't trying to get rid of her. In fact, if she wanted to stay I would be entirely too okay with that. "Maya. I'm going to be here a few more days, if you want to stay we can do that too." That wasn't something I should have offered, but I did. Hopefully she wouldn't take me up on it.
I wanted her to take me up on that.
"Can I come with you to the store and maybe just have more time to clear my head?"
"Of course."
She smiled at me. That sweet soft smile.
Fuck, what had I just done?
***
May and I were back from town. We both did a load of laundry, had lunch at the small diner near the laundromat and I had restocked my cold food stores. I got a few extra things just in case she stayed.
It felt more like I had known her for years. Not days. It was hard to wrap my head around everything that had happened in the last week. I only had a few more nights here than was moving the pop-up to a private campground for two weeks. It would have been totally okay with me if she stayed until I left.
Maya hadn't mentioned calling anyone or me driving her home. I knew she had her phone with her, she texted someone on the drive. If I was bringing her home, it would need to be soon, it was over an hour each way.
"Bria?"
"Yeah?" I was folding and putting away my now clean clothes, as was she.
"Think we can watch a movie? My roommate is going to come get me in a few hours." She wasn't looking at me as she spoke.
"Sure." I tried to hide my disappointment that she was leaving. She went and looked through the movies while I set the dining area up as a seating area like I had done a few days before. It wasn't dark out yet, so I closed the windows that were glaring on the television. Chips went into a bowl and we each grabbed a water.
Once we both finished folding and putting away our stuff, I popped her movie of choice into the blu ray player. 'The Hunger Games'. I had seen it more than a few times, but it remained one of my favorites. The book was even better, but that was a given. She sat down exactly where she had been days ago, and I did the same.
I clicked play. My hand didn't reach into the chip bowl. Hers did. I did my best to stay focused on the movie, not her. She moved the chip bowl and was closer to me like before. The smell of coconut wafted up to me as she shifted.
We watched that way, neither of us moving. My mind was playing through scenarios where this movie watching led to more. To something else.
The fact that I had ever let myself go to a different reality was only setting myself up for disappointment. I had to resign myself to the fact that this was just two new friends watching a movie. Nothing more.
I was so caught up in overthinking, I missed her adjusting herself. Her arm was d****d over my thighs. She was leaning into my arm. Like we were best friends. Like we were more. I had to close my eyes to keep myself from leaning in and kissing her. At least I knew for certain that the coconut scent came from her shampoo.
I felt her fingers tense and dig slightly into my thigh. My head was spinning. You didn't do that on accident. What did she want? Was it what I wanted? She didn't move and her fingers stayed were they were.
I couldn't begin to focus on the ending of the movie. I had this sweet, nice, cute as fuck girl in my camper, nearly snuggled into me with her hand grasping my thigh.
I moved my left arm; it was now inches from the hand she had on my thigh. My eyes stayed on the movie, but my focus was on the heat building up around me. Time moved slower than I ever thought possible as I felt the pressure from her hand on my thigh shift, one finger was now touching my hand. I turned to look at her, she was looking at me.
Our eyes locked on to each other.
"Maya! Maya where are you?" A voice boomed outside my pop-up.
"Fuck." Maya almost growled.
I just stared at her. This was not happening again.
"It's my roommate." She got up, opened the door and called out, "over here Brandon."
A moment later there was a third person inside my small camper. "Hey dork!" Her roommate was huge, bigger than the b**st. For a moment I worried the floor would buckle under him.
Maya introduced us. He grabbed her bags and we pried ourselves out of the tight space. "Thank-you Bria for coming to my Maya's rescue. I'm going to find Nate and wring his neck for this." He put her bags down on the picnic table as he spoke. Then, like a well raised guy, he put his right hand forward, waiting for me to shake it. I did. "It's nice to meet you Bria. Again, thank-you for being a decent human."
'My Maya'. Everything about the way he moved, spoke, looked, told me Brandon was as gay as I was. I smiled briefly.
Then he looked at Maya and told her he was taking her bags to his car. She told him she would be right there. I shuffled my feet as she turned towards me. "Thanks Bria. For everything. I'm really glad we met." She stepped towards me and gave me a hug. A little tighter and longer than any other she had initiated. I hugged her back, letting go before she did.
I watched as she walked away, walked out of my life.
***
The early morning air was crisp. The sun was dancing slowly up the horizon. It was my last day, my last sunrise hike here. The pop-up was half packed. After this hike, I would pack up my SUV, close up the camper and move on to the next locale. Jasper was mad I didn't plan to stop home before I changed locations. I stopped answering his texts and didn't pick up my cell when he called last night.
After Maya left, I got mad. Mad that I hadn't at least gotten her number. Now, there was nothing to be done about that. I didn't even know her last name, only knew what she did for a living, and stalking every ambulance service trying to find her would not play out well. Or be even remotely okay.
As the sun rose, I started moving towards it. Three hours later, I was back on the access road that led to my campsite. I walked by my SUV on the way. Unlocking it, I tossed my backpack in the back seat. Other campers were leaving, new ones were coming in. The area was busier than it had been in days.
I was watching everyone bustle around as I turned into my site. Out of the corner of my eye, I spotted someone at my picnic table. I had another two hours before I had to be out of the site, people were so damn impatient.
Two steps closer and the figure at the table came into focus. Maya. My feet stopped moving. She stood up. In her hand was the stuff for s'mores. She shook them like she had done every time before and said, "want some?" The smile on her face shrunk her eyes.
My chest filled with butterflies and I felt my own face fill with a smile. I moved closer to her, her eyes never leaving mine. "Hey." I was inches from her.
"Hey."
Our eyes were still locked. I heard the sound of something dropping at the same time I felt lips on my own. It took me a second to realize she had dropped the bag with the s'mores stuff, and it was her lips on mine. My mind was swirling, my heart pounding. Confusion coursed through my mind as my body reacted to what was happening.
I kissed her back. Awkwardly at first. Only our lips were touching, nothing else. I hadn't taken my eyes off hers. Desire ripped through me now. One hand went behind her neck as I regained control of myself and kissed her deeper. One of her hands was on my face. An eternity rolled out around us as we kissed. Time didn't matter. Nothing mattered. She was here. Somehow she had come back.
Her lips were on mine. Everything I thought I knew about her flew out the window.
The kiss ended. I was still looking at her. It took me a moment to remember how to speak. In that time, she bent down, pick up the bag with the s'mores stuff and repeated, "want some?"
"Yes please."