Getting off the Seesaw Book 2 Chapter 7
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Barry woke up in bed alone. Nothing new there. He was curious about what Diane might be up to, but they had agreed that secrets were allowed, and whatever it was, he’d know by Sunday morning.
He got up, realised that the shower wouldn’t work because the water was still off and set off downstairs wearing the shorts he’d slept in. There was no new leak. He walked around the carpet a few times — the squelching had gone. The carpet still felt a little damp to his fingers, so he left the heating on.
He made toast and coffee, looked at the clock and wondered whether he should phone Diane. What time would she wake if she was by herself? Hard to tell, leave it half an hour, wait until the tradesmen have arrived, and he had a plan for the day.
The electrician appeared first with another young woman as an assistant. They had a brief conversation while the boss lady explained what she planned and the assistant carried kit in from their van.
The man in charge of installing the grill appeared next, and with a new assistant.
“I had an idea,” Barry said, “As the ceiling is damaged, wouldn’t it be better to take that section out and fit the new beam hard up against the joists, then plaster the ceiling back against it.”
“I had the same idea,” the guy said. “It’ll make the whole thing stronger. What are you going to do about the carpet?”
“I think we’ll change it when you’ve finished. When the gate is down it fits into a channel, right? Any chance the channel can be about the same height as the depth of a carpet plus underlay? We could then carpet up against it. Would that work?”
“Won’t it look odd when the gate is up?”
“I thought it would be good to floor the area inside the gate with something else. Something solid.”
“You mean like wood?”
“Or something that looks like stone, slate or something like that.”
“We could do that.”
“There you go. That would be great. Something thick enough to work with the carpet?”
“Yeah, no problem. You might be able to get your carpet man to set some carpet in the channel, with a spongy underlay. The grill will compress it when it's down, but when it's up it should all blend in.”
“Great. Do that. Can you shift the furniture into the garage, rip up the carpet, and go from there.”
“Okay, squire. We’ll get on with it.”
“One other thing, there’s a couple of women running around sorting out the wiring, try not to bother them. Is your mate okay? No serious damage?”
“Yeah, he’s just using it as an excuse to skive off. I’ll sort him out next week. A good lesson to learn.”
Barry retreated to the kitchen, made coffee and called Diane
A man answered.
“Ah, hello? Who is that? Can I speak to Diane, please?”
“Hang on, I’ll call her. Who shall I say it is?”
“Barry.”
He heard a clunk as the phone was put down and then a knocking sound.
“Dee, phone,” said a muffled voice.
He couldn’t hear any reply.
Seconds later the phone was picked up.
“She’ll call you back.”
“Who are you?”
“Her boss.”
“I didn’t know she was working.”
“This week she’s working for me, didn’t she tell you?”
“Any idea when she can call?”
“When she’s out of the shower, I guess.”
The phone cut off.
Barry sat down, staring at his coffee. “I think I just ruined your surprise, Di,” he said.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Diane came out of the shower.
“Who was that on the phone?”
“Barry somebody. I told him you’d call him back.”
“What, straight away?”
“I said you’d call when you were out of the shower.”
“Oh, fuck.”
“What?”
“That was my husband. Now he’s wondering why I’ve got a man in my room when I’m in the shower.
He laughed. “It’s tough being a whore, so many balls to juggle.”
“You’re bothering me now. If you have any idea that you might break me away from my husband so I keep working for you, then there’s something you need to know.”
“Oh yeah? What’s that. You’ll need a pimp once he leaves you.”
“He won’t leave and he won’t throw me out. I’m sure of that. What you need to know is that Barry is a top class lawyer. Being on the wrong side of him can be a cruel and unusual place. He will dream up some interesting punishment for me... which I will no doubt deserve and may even enjoy. Don’t do anything else to piss him off.”
“Okay, okay. I shouldn’t have picked up the phone. So this is some kinky game?”
“You could call it that. Don’t worry about it. Can I make a suggestion? Tonight, why don’t you see if one of the other staff fancies riding shotgun. Your MC guy might fancy it, or the barman, or maybe a woman. What do you think?”
“You are a piece of work.”
“I know, but is it a good idea?”
“Yeah, yeah it is. You gonna need that all week?”
“Probably. Barry is at home right this minute checking on where my phone is. He’ll find the hotel with a strip club next door, and he’ll jump to the obvious conclusion.”
“Then what?”
“He’ll figure something out. Not right away, because he’s got all the burst pipe and ruined carpet to sort out, but Saturday night could be interesting.”
“You’re looking forward to it?”
“Oh, yeah. Whatever it is, it’ll be good. Meanwhile, I’ll be here, making you money., okay?”
He nodded. “Yeah, I guess. You were a good fuck.”
“I know, but a guy like you needs variety, right?”
“Yeah, that’s my problem.”
“One other thing, one to tell the MC, second act tonight, tell him whoever wins the auction, his name is Fred for the night. I think that could add to the buzz.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Barry watched the men and women work. He helped roll up the carpet and organised a skip to take away the debris. With the furniture and the carpet removed he was at a loose end, so sat in the garden and started detective work on finding out what Diane was up to.
The builders ripped out the section of ceiling and moved the debris outside. By mid-morning they were ready to collect the steelwork, so told Barry they would be away for a couple of hours.
Barry easily tracked down Diane’s hotel. The question was what job might she be doing that would entail her boss being outside her bathroom. Knowing Diane’s history, or more to the point, not knowing too much about what she did apart from fucking big cocks, when she had her weeks away, he tried hard to resist jumping to conclusions.
He downloaded maps of the area and identified some businesses. She might be doing something at the hotel, but what? An alternative was the strip club next door. There was a limit to what he could find out on the internet. A visit seemed like the best idea.
He sought out the two electricians and found the assistant.
“Hi,” he said. “I need to go out for an hour or two, are you two okay here by yourselves? You won’t need to go off-site for anything?”
“Hey, Beth,” she yelled. “Client wants to know if we are okay to be here a couple of hours.”
Beth appeared. “Sure,” she said. “Mary and I have plenty to do. Let me have your number in case. How long will the two blokes be away?”
“A couple of hours.”
“Right.” She wiped the sweat off her brow. “I know I told you to run the heating to clear the damp, but it makes it pretty warm pulling wires and crawling around in the roof.”
“I guess the overalls don’t help.” Mary giggled. “If there’s no one here, we can do something about that.”
Barry laughed. “Be my guest. There is a pool outside. If you need to cool off, feel free to use it.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Barry parked near the hotel and strolled around, keeping his eyes open, looking for Diane’s car. He drew a blank. He made some enquiries about room rates at the hotel. He made notes in his phone, and then quickly turned back to the receptionist.
“I was inquiring for a friend of mine who I thought was visiting tomorrow, but I’ve just seen my diary. I’m an idiot, I think she may have come last night.”
“What’s her name?”
“This is embarrassing,” he said. “I never know exactly what name she’s using. Did you ever see that movie, Notting Hill, well you know the drill? It Could be Diane or Dee, but what surname she’s using is her business.”
“We do have a Dee in the penthouse, but I think she’s out. I can ring if you like.”
“Could you?”
There was no answer.
“Is the club next door connected to the hotel?”
Barry had a knack of being able to ask questions as though his enquiry was a serendipitous curiosity.
“Not exactly,” the girl said.
“Not exactly?”
“The guy that owns the club has shares in the hotel,” she said. “He has a permanent rent on the penthouse. Your friend must know him.”
“Very likely,” he said. “She has friends all over. She probably contacted him because I got the date wrong. One of these days I must teach myself to give up the absent-minded professor act.”
“Are you actually a professor?’
“Yes,” he said, laughing. “That’s what makes it so hard to drop the act."
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Diane drove over to the house, saw the electrician’s van on the drive, so parked in the street. The front door was locked, but the side entrance was open. She strolled around the back of the house, hearing excited female voices.
As she came into the garden she was surprised to find a naked woman getting out of the pool and another swimming to the side.
She stood waiting to be seen. The woman looked shocked and ran to grab a towel.
“Who are you?”
“Who are you?” said the woman as she wrapped a towel around herself.
“I live here.”
“Oh, oh right. Your husband has gone into town. He said he’d be a couple of hours. He should be back soon. We’re the electricians. He said we could use the pool if we got too hot. He’s got the heating on full pelt to dry the place out.”
“It’s a good story,” Diane said. “Can you show me the wreckage?”
“Oh sure. Thanks for letting us use the pool.”
They walked into the house. “What actually happened.?”
“All I know is a pipe upstairs leaked and was pouring central heating fluid through the ceiling. I’m not sure what happened after that. I think your husband got someone to look at it and one of them managed to cut a wire and short all the circuits, that’s why we’re here. A lot of the wiring is old, so your husband said it was best to rewire the whole place.”
“That sounds like Barry,” Diane said.
“Sorry about the pool, it must be a shock to come into your own house and find two naked women.”
Diane smiled. “I don’t know. There are days when I wish it happened more often. Why don’t you stay in the pool and shock him?”
“You want us to do that?”
“I would love you to do that.”
Beth giggled.
“Seriously,” Diane said. “I only wish I could be here to see, but I need to go.”
“Shall I tell him you were here?”
“No, just surprise him in the pool, or work naked around the house, something to shock him.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Armed with his information about the owner of the club and the penthouse, Barry decided to venture in. The club opened from midday onwards so mid-afternoon Barry visited.
He found the bar, bought a beer and stayed at the bar to watch the show.
“You new in town?”
“Is that what you ask all the new customers?”
“Kind of. It pays to know what folk are looking for.”
“You know how it is, time on my hands.”
“You’d do better coming back tonight.”
“How so?”
“We got a new girl, does this crazy act. She strips down to a chastity belt and then they auction the key.”
“That sounds far out. Is that every night?”
“Twice every night. Last night, the second time around, they auctioned her room key along with the other one.”
“What did that go for?”
“Three-forty, but last night is always a quiet night. If you’re interested, you might need a lot more than that.”
“Why not wait till everyone has had a go and come back when the price goes down? The novelty will wear off.”
“She’s only here till Saturday.”
“So what do you reckon Saturday will go to?”
“A grand is likely, and it could be more.”
“This town is more interesting than I thought. So who gets that money?”
“I don’t know, I mean the boss takes some for sure, fifty-fifty would be my guess.”
“So this broad is likely to make a grand on the week?”
“Oh sure, she gets tips on the night and a percentage, all that auction stuff is on top.”
“Sounds like a lot of work for the money, wouldn’t she make more on the game?”
“Yeah.”
“But riskier I guess.”
“That’s another thing, she gets to use the bosses penthouse, that’s the room key they auction in the late show. Hey and this will make you jealous.”
The barman smirked.
“Go on.”
“She has to have a bodyguard, you know, in case whoever wins the auction tries to take liberties. One of us gets to be the minder. Jo the MC is doing tonight, and I get tomorrow.”
“And poor schmucks like me have to bid for it. I’m surprised the boss doesn’t grab that for himself.”
“Oh, he did last night. I can’t wait, I mean imagine waking up with a broad like that.”
“I haven’t seen her yet.”
“Oh, you should. She’s not one of these kids, I tell you this lady has class, sex appeal coming out of her fingertips, great boobs, great legs, shaved pussy. Hundred per cent class.”
“Looks like I’ll have to come Saturday.”
“Better bring your cheque book.”
Barry finished his drink, watched the afternoon show for one more act, and headed home.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
When he returned the builders had the steelwork in place and samples of the flooring to show him. He picked a slate grey tile.
Once that work was in motion he went in search of the electricians.
“How is it going?”
“Good progress,” Beth said."We’ll get it done by the weekend."
“I’m going to be out on Saturday late afternoon and evening, but having everything working on Sunday would be good.”
“It shouldn’t be a problem. Thanks for letting us use the pool, it made all the difference.”
“Did you brink kit?”
“We figured, while there was no one around, it didn’t matter.”
Barry grinned. “I’m sorry I missed it.”
“Wouldn’t you get into trouble with the missus?”
Barry’s face screwed up in a mock frown. “I think she’d be okay with that.”
“Really?”
“I’d be more concerned with whether you would be okay. A lot of people are quite shy about skinny dipping.”
“Not us.”
“Well, I’ll tell you what. Diane will be home next week, come over after work unless you’re working miles away.”
“Should we ring first?”
“Yeah, I guess. I don’t think we’ll be away, but you never know. One condition, it has to be skinny dipping.”
“So you are a pervert.”
“Me, no, Diane... that’s another question.”
Both girls laughed.
“Did you know she came by while you were out?”
“No.” Barry laughed. “Did she tell you not to mention that?”
“She did, and she said we should skinny dip to shock you.”
“What did I tell you. That’s Diane all over. I’m glad she’s seen the mess. Let me ask you a question. The carpet needs replacing. Should I just order one, or should I insist on letting her choose, or both choosing together?”
“Most people would choose together, I think.”
“That’s my guess too. I’ll let you get on, I have calls to make.”
Barry spent half an hour calling carpet stores and finding out who could do fast delivery and fitting if he and Diane visited tomorrow.
Next move, call Diane. What time did her show start? A quick look at the clock said there must be an hour to spare. He called.
“Diane love, are you busy tomorrow?”
“Part of the time.”
She sounded cagey, well she would, wouldn’t she?
“We need a new carpet. I’ve made all the measurements and I’ve found a store that can do it straight away. I thought it would be best if we both had a look and picked something we liked. Is there some time you could be free for an hour or two?”
“You are cunningly not asking me what I’m doing.”
“You haven’t asked me either.”
“I know what you are doing and I bet it wasn’t what you planned.”
“How do you mean?”
“Barry love, I know you are running around chasing tradespeople to clear up the mess.”
“Yeah,” he chuckled. “You should see it.”
“I have love. I came over this afternoon, I felt guilty about leaving you all alone, but you were out.”
Yeah, chasing suppliers. It seems like if I do the running around, it will all get done faster."
“I like your electricians.”
“Were they in the pool?”
Diane laughed.
“Why did you tell them not to mention that you’d come?”
“Guilt,” she said. “All that mess, I should have been helping.”
“Uh, huh. Nothing can be done about that. I know you’re busy. I called this morning, talked to some guy who said he was your boss. You didn’t call back. Typical boss behaviour, he didn’t pass on the message. So what’s this job?”
“That’s my secret.”
“I guessed it might be. Should I be worried?”
“No more than I should be.”
What did she mean by that?
“I think you might have to explain that to me on Saturday.”
“Saturday?”
“The house should be back together by Saturday, so I was figuring I might come to see you on Saturday, Is that okay? Will you be working?”
“Yes, it’s my last evening. I’d love it if you could come to the hotel that night.”
“I’ll be there, you will have to send me the address.”
“Okay, so about this carpet,” she said. “Could we do it over lunch?”
“Have lunch and look at the carpets? What time shall I meet you?”
“I’ll tell you what. Find a restaurant near the carpet shop and text me. I’ll see you there at about twelve. Will that work?”
“Sounds like a plan.”
“Are you worried about this work I’m doing?”
Barry tried to think. From what he’d found out, this was Diane’s effort to replace her playing away with something that would produce the buzz, that could be managed in such a way that she could be anonymous, and most likely not get Barry into trouble. Was she trying to push him? Did she expect him to come and watch? Would she be upset if he did? What the hell should he say?
“I don’t know what you’re doing love, but I’m assuming you do, and it can’t be too freaky. If things had gone to plan I’d have been with you now, at least at night.”
“Mmmm, pity about that.”
“So I’ll see you tomorrow at about twelve.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
“Are you going to pull any extras tonight?”
“Not tonight," Diane said. "I figure it went well yesterday, so why mess with a winning game? Did you fix up for one of the boys to ride shotgun?”
“Jo, the MC is doing tonight.”
“Is he married?”
“Yeah.”
“Is he bringing his wife?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Is he entitled to the deal you claimed?”
“That’s up to you.”
“Meaning what?”
“It depends on how grateful you are. He’s putting himself out for you. You might give him a reward.”
Diane nodded. “I get the picture. Who do I have tomorrow?”
“Al, the barman.”
“Same deal?”
“I think he’s hopeful, he’s a big fan.”
“Oh great. What about Friday?”
“I’m working on it. Would you be happy with any of the girls? There's a couple that might be interested.”
“I guess they can use a phone as well as the next. Will I need to pay them?”
“Or give them the same deal as the boys.”
“Oh, really?”
“Are you up for that?”
Diane blinked. “It never crossed my mind, but what the hell, it would complete my education.”
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Barry met Diane as planned. They had lunch and spent an hour at the carpet place. They selected a deep pile that was said to be stain-resistant and sumptuous. Barry arranged for delivery and fitting on Friday.
“What now?” Diane said.
“I guess we get on with our jobs.”
“You haven’t asked me what I’m doing.”
“I could say the same about you.”
“Yes,” she laughed. “You must be curious.”
“I’m a patient man. I’ve had training.”
“They teach that in law school?”
“Yes, and you completed the education. I never knew when you were going to come back from your trips away, and I learned that texting and asking did me no good. I learned patience. I trusted you, and I have since had confirmed that my trust was not misplaced.”
“You put that so well. I was cruel. We have both learned.”
“We have. There’s no doubt about that. I am curious, but with all the chaos at home, I’ve put my curiosity on hold until Saturday. If I don’t know what you’ve been up to by, let’s say, two o’clock Sunday morning, then I will get very curious.”
“Why two o’clock?”
“If I was waiting for you at home after you’d been to a dinner, or a night out with friends, I think around about two is probably when I’d start to worry if you hadn’t come home. Exactly when Saturday night ends, for entertainment purposes, is a bit vague and I’m sure there are a variety of precedents. I think two o’clock is a better bet than midnight unless you happen to be wearing glass slippers.”
“The legal brain is back in action, I see,” she said.
He knows, she thought. Somehow or another he knows, but I don’t have a clue what he’s been up to, apart from fixing broken pipes and wiring.
“I love you,” she said, “more and more each day. Don’t worry, all will be revealed on Saturday.”
In more ways than one, she thought.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~ ~
The next two days were rather less chaotic than the beginning of the week. Diane’s act went over better and better, the auctions raising increasing sums of money.
Barry made a point of visiting the club during the afternoon sessions the day after Al’s session as the bodyguard.
“Was she as good as you expected?”
“Awesome. Never had better.”
“You’re just saying that to get me to bid on Saturday.”
“No mate, honest, that woman is amazing. I can’t imagine why her husband lets her do this.”
“Maybe he doesn’t know.”
“Could be. He’ll know on Saturday. She said he’s staying the night.”
“Let’s hope it’s not too big a shock.”
“Could be, could be.”
“So how does this bodyguard business work?”
“The suite has two bedrooms. She works in one, the bodyguard is in the other watching and recording everything on TV, you know, to make sure it’s all fair play.”
“Recording everything?"
"Yeah, so any hanky-panky, they're bound to get caught."
"And you rush in if it gets out of hand?”
“Yeah. She makes them all use protection. On my night the guy in question was a bit pushy, so I had to go in and tell him.”
“Was he bigger than you?”
“He was, but all I had to do was tell him to play ball or he’d be barred from the club forever.”
“How long do they stay?”
“The deal is an hour, but I think it depends on how much she likes them. If they want another hour, she doubles the rate.”
“So it would cost a fortune to stay all night.”
“Yeah. If the punter had the money, I guess she wouldn’t say no.”
“Did you get your go after the punter had gone?”
“She gave me a choice, either then or she’d wake me with a nice surprise. I had the morning surprise.”
“Was it good?”
“Was it ever.”
“Are there any pictures of the lady?”
“Part of her deal is no pictures, but I sneaked one off the TV.”
He pulled his phone out and in a second Barry was doing his best to keep a blank expression as he looked at a full-frontal nude of Diane.
He used his finger to expand the picture and stared at her face.
“I think I’ve met her,” he said. “Can’t place where, but she looks familiar. If I come on Saturday is there a place where I can sit so she wouldn’t see me? I'd hate her to recognise me before I remember where I've seen her. I wouldn't want to put her off.”
“I thought you were going to bid.”
“Yeah, but I can bid from a dark corner, can't I. It would add a bit of mystery. What do you think? I wouldn’t want to spook her.”
“Where did you meet her?”
“I can’t place it, there’s something, a bell ringing somewhere.”
“A bit over from where you are now is as good as any place to sit, at the end of the bar. You could turn away and see most of the action in the mirror behind the bar.”
“I owe you a big tip,” Barry said. “I’ve got to go now.” He put a ten note on the bar. “Keep the change.”
Maddy
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