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Fervour of the Past by Tegeli CHAPTER 1 The old tramp freighter wheezed from the relief of completing the long voyage over turbulent seas. I myself was more than glad to get off. While I had been forced to splurge my last funds on a private cabin, it had been a cramped fit. The moist air was almost still. I wouldn't have minded more breeze from the sea. Even though the port town of Heva was close to the polar circle, the summer sun kept me uncomfortably warm under my gown. "Do you need help with that luggage, miss?" I startled out of my thoughts. The man had spoken in posh and unaccented Conglomerate, but wore Roluan attire, which was rather dandy in looks compared to his heavy tan. The sharp lines of his handsome face weren't of local type, and his tall and wiry build lacked in the stockiness I had observed in the native Roluan mariners. "Associate Bemariq?" I asked. My pleasingly feminine voice came without effort. "Yes. You must be miss haz-Merin." I wasn't, but I nodded and handed my suitcase to him. "You are travelling light," he said. "I would have assumed a young woman needed to bring more spare clothes." "Oh, Heva should have some shops. No need to carry overmuch." In truth, the gown I wore was my only one. Men rarely needed many of those. The tonics I had purloined and ingested had been worth the fever, tooth ache and cramps they had caused. Nobody had looked at me askance in my feminine dress during the voyage. Beforehand I had been forced to rely on heavy makeup and avoiding well-lighted establishments and thorough evaluation. I had kept the changes minimal, in order to make return less cumbersome. My appearance had never lost its boyish frailty, and my build had always been lithe. Now, after the tonic regimen, my jaw was slightly smaller, my nose decidedly daintier and my lips fuller. For my thin body, only the slight widening of my hips had been necessary. Long term waist training now paid off as a sylphlike frame. My second-hand living corset, with its self-tightening embrace, was a delight to wear. It supported and even massaged my back. However, at first I hadn't been aware of the substances it secreted through my skin. The additional chemical treatment had helped my torso mould, it seemed permanently. That was no matter. Without the corset, my waist wasn't narrow enough to look overtly strange on a thin man, and while wearing it my middle was wonderfully slender. Bemariq stopped at a carriage, which was gobbling up fish offal and other organic waste. Its carapace had lost its lustre, and the skin peeking in between the hard surfaces was unsightly blotched. "Your carriage is sickly, associate." "It's just getting old, miss haz-Merin. Roluans don't grow these, so getting even this one was a bother." He tickled the carriage between its carapace. The creature chortled and opened an elytron to reveal the compartment inside. The peculiar buildings of Heva showed whalebone-like supporting structures. The houses were uniformly vivid, unlike the clothes of the locals. While Roluans dressed rather snappily, the ubiquitous greys and blacks were dreary. At least some women had some colour in their gowns. "Is the dig far away?" I asked. "No." Bemariq smiled. "We'll be there we'll before evening." "Strange that a foreigner like you would head the excavation so close to a large city like this." "The Roluans don't care about the remains. At least not enough to pay anyone to dig them up." "Why is that? Weren't they made by their ancestors?" He shook his head. "They do not think so, and neither do I. The idea that the site was built by them, before they 'degenerated' on their own, is preposterous. As you can very well see now that you are here, Roluans don't differ from us in terms of general sophistication." "Yes, you wrote a monograph about it. It was rather panned." He chuckled without mirth. "An understatement, if I ever heard one! We almost lost our funding." Bemariq gritted his teeth. "Those dolts, who write about things they have never seen, have little understanding of anything not in their immediate vicinity. Luckily a few of the scholars back home have a little more sense than none. By pulling all strings I could, I managed to keep this enterprise afloat." "So, who do you think built the complex at Karimma site? You didn't mention that in the monograph." His smile retuned. "You read it? Good. And yes, I didn't mention anything of my hypothesis. That was lucky. Even the hard facts were too much for the academia. Miss haz-Merin, how old do you think the Karimma site is?" "I can't claim to know. But I'd guess: about five hundred years, perhaps? A thousand at most." Bemariq shook his head. "We haven't been able to analyse the swampy soil yet, but I'm beginning to think the buildings have stood for at least three thousand years." I gasped. "But that means..." He nodded. "We are breaking new ground on pre-Collapse studies." I kept my expression amazed, even though I had well known about the suspicions that the Karimma site predated the Collapse. That was why I had got myself hired as Bemariq Usinilim's assistant. The wording of the job offer had made quite clear that only youthful female candidates would be considered. Such limitation was convenient for me: I didn't have to fake a diploma, as no woman would get certified in the academies, yet my own education had given me an edge in the interview. The ride was bumpy due to the carriage limping one of its legs, but we reached our destination before I grew bothered by it. The Karimma site was in middle of a series of hills, overlooking a river valley. A large rectangular hole had been dug into the soft soil. From there peaked a series of greenish roofs and pillars of a style completely unfamiliar to me. Bemariq smiled. "Impressive, isn't it?" "There's not much to see, but the good state of the remains is surprising." "Yes, it indeed is. Most of the buildings are structurally sound, even after all this time. A clear sign of pre-Collapse technology, don't you think?" Roluans were all burly men with either bland expressions or smiles, which seemed to be amused by jokes that only existed in their own heads. Bemariq addressed them mostly in Jaanish, though a few knew simple but clear Conglomerate. To the ones, who spoke neither oceanic language, Bemariq spoke in stumbling Roluish, which I didn't understand. The main tents had rooted thoroughly, and grown thick bark and foliage. "You can have the tent of the late associate zef-Wared." Bemariq pointed at the second largest one. "What happened to him?" "He was beyond old and fell ill last winter." Bemariq dismissed the thought with a wave of his hand. "These things happen." My tent had almost had the time grow into a proper house. The smooth walls were sturdy, and the floor was completely covered by wood-like surface. The inside was divided into several compartments. The foyer was also an office, and the tent had a bedroom and a tiny combined kitchen and storage room. The bathroom was the biggest surprise. Not only had it a sizeable tub, but a shower with warm water. The grime of the sea voyage irritated my skin, so I undressed and washed myself. After drying, I wrapped a towel around my waist and walked to the bedroom. "Miss haz-Merin. I brought you som--" Bemariq stared at me. The tonic regimen had softened the flesh on my chest and widened the areola, but I didn't have proper breasts. Still, a girl would be self- conscious about them. I understood to yelp and turn around. Luckily my towel had hid my penis. "I'm sorry," Bemariq said from behind the door curtain. "I didn't realize you'd be so swift to take a bath. Anyhow, I brought you some work clothes. Do you want to go see the dig, before the sun sets?" After swallowing, I said, "Yes I would, associate Bemariq." The clothes were men's, and oversized for me. Yet my reflection was not a long-haired wimpy boy's, but that of a boyish girl. That should alleviate any untoward ideas the seeing of me, fresh from the shower, might have elicited. Bemariq was waiting outside tent. He had changed into an outfit fitting a labourer. I blushed under his gaze. While the workers had removed tons of earth, wide dig site had very little to look at. Yet, the poking roofs promised immediate progress. All of the structures were made from grey material with a blue-green tint that shifted with the eye. It was as hard as stone, but warm to touch, even though nothing indicated that the material was alive. "You can really appreciate the site from up from that pillar," Bemariq said. "Oh." Perhaps he could have jumped high enough to climb up, but certainly couldn't. "I can lift you up." "Alright." I turned face the pillar. Firm hands grabbed my waist, and I yelped. Even without my corset, his fingers came noticeably close to touching. Perhaps I had overdone the waist training, but it was hard to imagine a man like Bemariq to have disapproved. Bemariq lifted me up like I had the mass of dry wood. My fingers reached the top of the pillar, but even before the tonic regimen, I wouldn't have been strong enough to pull myself up. The man moved his hand down. His fingers sunk deep into my buttocks, as he pushed me up. After I managed to get my elbows on top, Bemariq lifted me from my feet, and I managed to clamber on the pillar. I certainly could see the site now. On the ground the structures had seemed to be in mere disarray, but from high up the asymmetric geometry was visible. "What do you think this place was?" Bemariq asked. "I have no idea. Doesn't seem like a fortress, or a residential area." "We'll figure it out. Let me help you down." When my feet were safely on the soft soil, his hands still lingered on my body. I had long since stopped pretending men --at least handsome ones-- didn't excite my inner self. A strong man, able and willing to casually lift me around, whipped my heart into a frantic beat. Bemariq could do anything he wanted to me, and I wouldn't be able to stop him. And he clearly wanted to do something with me. That was convenient. And so also was that my trousers were baggy, because otherwise the prick straining against my underwear would have been obvious. "Would you like to join me at dinner, miss haz-Merin?" the man asked. CHAPTER 2 I pressed every detail about Bemariq's tent into my memory, in case it became prudent to sneak into it. Bemariq kept his living quarters in tidy order, and the furniture was sturdy enough to give the impression of a proper home instead of temporary camp accommodations. "You manage to live rather comfortably, despite the circumstances, associate Bemariq." "A man of status must keep up certain quality of life. Speaking of which, how you find your own quarters, disregarding unfortunate boorish intrusions?" "They are quite fine. I feared, I'd have to live in a small tent with only a river to wash in." Bemariq chuckled. "That would be indecent, and unpleasant for everyone, save for the men who could chance to ogle at you." I fanned my hand in pretended indignation. "Are you saying you enjoy the sight of me?" "You are indeed alluring, miss haz-Merin." I smiled. "Well, associate Bemariq. You aren't half bad yourself." Now that I had indicated my potential availability, I could move on to playing hard to get. Bemariq maintained both polite interest and gallant avoidance of crass advances. Unfortunately, due to my situation, his well-meaning compliments were like worms gnawing into my chest. "Is haz-Merin your maiden name?" I pouted. "A daring question. But yes, it is. Is there a lady Usinilim waiting back home?" "No. I've been travelling most of my life since leaving the academy." "Did you have someone in the academy," I blurted. It was a daring question, considering academies in the Conglomerate were only for male pupils. Despite myself, my heart beat faster as my face warmed. Bemariq smirked. "The ongoings in those academies must be the subject of many salacious rumours." "They are." I knew from experience that rumours often downplayed the real events. "Well, I did not partake in anything improper. Nevertheless, I had a dalliance with one of the... girls there. Unfortunately I misjudged the situation to my disappointment. After graduation she dropped the practice, and in short order became a husband and a man of rapidly advancing career." My breathing halted. I had pushed him into the question, but he had answered it readily. Had Bemariq figured me out? I almost didn't care, because if he spoke true, we might not need to stop at mere flirting. I bit my tongue. I had to collect myself. Bemariq falling for me was useful, but any feelings I had for him were a hindrance. I wasn't out to find a lover, but to acquire artefacts worth extravagant sums on the black market. To steal from him. "How about you?" Bemariq asked. "Have you had any affections to women, including perhaps manly ones?" Keeping my narrative as close to truth as possible was beneficial, whenever I had to lie. Now I could tell the truth. I smiled coyly. "From time to time. But not very often." Bemariq stood up politely, when I stood. The dinner was finished, and I needed to hurry back to my tent, before I jeopardized my plans with thoughtless deeds. My breathing was hard to keep steady, and my member strained against its silky prison. "Thank you for the meal, associate Bemariq. Tomorrow is a big a day for me, so I must be getting to bed." He walked to me, but I managed to stay put. Bemariq took my hand and kissed it. "Good night, miss haz-Merin." "Good night." The door clutched itself shut after me. Certain type of pressure had built inside me. Unfortunately, I had never been able to dissipate my arousal by mental exercises. Physical release was necessary to have any peace, but I didn't want to soil my only clothes. I undressed, washed myself and lay on the bed. I had to dampen any of my desires involving Bemariq. Most convenient way was concentrating on more straightforward lusts. I took my member in my hand, and imagined a scene involving fetching woman. The tonic regimen had stolen an inch of length from my already modest manhood. Despite being rock hard, it felt delicate even in my dainty hand. That didn't fit the image in my head; of a woman giving me carnal attention. My excitement melted into exhaustion. I could have forced myself to climax, but that wouldn't have been satisfying. My rod lost its rigidity. Still, unsatisfied arousal would trouble my sleep. I concentrated to clarify the mental image. Of the soft bosom, of the wide hips, of the thin waist wrapped in strong embrace. Bemariq would easily lift me up. I'd struggle, but he'd just laugh at my pitiful weak attempts at resistance. He'd heave me on his bed and-- I gasped and took my hand from my member. I was getting carried away by disgraceful fancies. Spending the whole long voyage as a woman must have unhinged parts of my mind. I got up from the bed, and poured myself a glass of distilled honeydew. That wouldn't do the job. I dropped a hint of oneiric powder in glass and drank it. Before I passed out, I managed to clamber into my bed. CHAPTER 3 I was glad to get to work, in order to ignore the yestereve's dinner. The locals were quick but careful diggers. I worked in cataloguing our finds. While the items were considerably old, they were crude items made from scavenged scrap during the Collapse times. They had some value, at least academically, but such artefacts were not in the interest of either me or Bemariq. Still, we classified and stored them away for posterity. My job was helped by a few locals, who had picked up skill in amateur archaeology. While they were meticulous and surprisingly knowledgeable, they didn't care about the science we were doing. "Why do you work here, if the past doesn't interest you?" I asked one of them. "The past of my people does interest me. Not these remnants of someone else. But to your question: this season, and the fishing is bad, but the pay here is good." I didn't argue further. I also was out for good pay. The excavations advanced at steady pace over the following two weeks. At evenings, I dined with Bemariq, whenever he didn't have business at Heva. He wasn't much of a cook, but compensated the lacking food with interesting enough conversation. At least, I was usually so engrossed with our talk that I didn't remember much of it back in my tent. After a while, my torrid thoughts about him couldn't be ignored. But I didn't have to poison myself asleep every night: the warmth in me dwindled, whenever I took off my clothes. Clearly, my subconscious didn't enjoy they idea of being with Bemariq as the man I was, but as a girl I pretended to be. As if the deception was what excited my inner self. Perhaps that was good: mere fancies were not truly dangerous. The roof of the main building was steadily revealed by the digging, until the top of a large doorway was revealed. Deep inside it, we could see a sturdy door, with strange writing on it. Bemariq announced a bonus for the workers, and suddenly everyone was cheering, him the foremost. Even I found myself excited about what would be inside. Certainly artefacts of great value, if everything hadn't rotten over the ages. If nothing unforeseen happened, we'd dig out the door before the rainy season. The associate smiled wide, and his elation infected my mind also. This could be the discovery of our generation. I almost forgot the riches I might get my hands on. When Bemariq stepped to hug me, I jumped against him. My groin pushed against his thigh. I recoiled, but he didn't pay attention to my hot blush, but went on to hand out osmium slivers to the hollering workers. Bemariq uncorked a bottle and poured us glasses of the dark liquid. "This is a cause for celebration, don't you think, miss haz-Merin?" I took a sip. It was proper wine instead of the fermented juice we had been drinking. "It's all good and exciting, yet the door looked well- sealed. Are we going to blast through?" "Hopefully not." He took out a half-sphere from his pocket and handed it to me. "What do you think this is?" The object had no obvious mechanisms, but had the primordial sturdiness of true pre-Collapse artefacts. The text was in unfamiliar letters that evoked some Collapse times alphabets I knew. The most important part of the writing was the series of markings, which corresponded exactly to the one on top of the door. "Is this... a key?" Bemariq nodded. "Most likely." "Where did you get it?" He smirked. "It's a long tale. This key is a part of an old legend. Several adventures have spent their lives following the clues, but they didn't have the help of modern statistic analysis methods." That was all interesting, but an ancient legend meant there was something worth sealing away. I smiled. "And now you found it." "With help of poor zef-Wared. Unfortunately he's not here to share this triumph." Bemariq took a long sip. "Oh well. At least I have you to celebrate with. Do you like the wine?" "I haven't drank any since leaving on the voyage here, so I guess it's alright." Bemariq snorted. "Yes, it's terrible." For the rest of the meal, I tried to steer the discussion into what would be inside the ancient building. Bemariq either didn't know or evaded the question skilfully. When I stood up, he politely did the same. "You don't want any dessert?" he asked. "No thanks." I patted my belly, which was squeezed by the corset. In its constriction, being able to eat even the main meal was difficult enough. "Good night, associate Bemariq." He nodded and kissed my hand. I turned to the door. "Wait a moment." Strong hands grabbed my arms below the shoulders, before I managed to turn. My legs went weak, when the silly fancies of earlier poured into my mind. His breath warmed my neck. "There is certain subject, I want to discuss." "Wh-what's that?" "I think I know, what you are." A thief? A swindler? I hadn't stolen anything from him, yet. Nevertheless, I found myself hoping for the more scandalous reveal. Or at least a part of my body, straining against my underwear, hoped for that distinct outcome. He turned me around easily. Even if I had resisted, there would have been little I could have done. Bemariq's smile was confident, and without malice. Unlikely then that he had received a message about my faked identity. I didn't notice his other hand dropping, until it brushed my groin. I yelped. His finger hadn't touched any vulva, that was sure. He didn't recoil or show any disgust. "How did you figure it out?" I whined. His smile became warm, but there was fire in his gaze. "I merely suspected. Most girls these days get their boobs grown." Damn. I should have done that. But breasts were supposedly rather inconvenient to get rid off. A hand snaked behind me, and pressed into my butt cheek. Bemariq drew me against him. A veritable baton in his trousers pressed into me. His head leaned down. I closed my eyes and let him push our lips together. After he pulled out of the kiss, he gave my butt a strong squeeze. "Did you start doing this in the academy?" "Yes..." A destitute boy with no family in an affluent school needed money, but had few means to acquire it. "Where you someone's lover, or for hire?" "It wasn't like that!" I had been good enough, mostly as a pickpocket, that I didn't actually have to provide anything my appearance promised. "If that's what you are asking, I haven't had sex." "With anyone, or just men?" My face warmed. I had been interested in girls, but I just hadn't made the effort to acquire their company. "Nobody." I cleared my throat. "Are you going to fire me now?" "Why would I?" "The job offer was clearly intended for women." He smirked. "And you are not a girl?" "I... I mean... Obviously--" Bemariq pressed a finger on my lips. "You can be, if you want to." I pouted. "What does that mean? Is dressing like this enough?" "No. It's the matter of attitude." His hand moved to my throat. Though his touch was gentle, it promised strength, which could quickly choke the life out of me. My toes curled in my shoes. "How so?" I whispered. "Nuance. There are men who like to dress as women, and boys who like to be girls. I tend to prefer girls." "And the latter presumably also remains employed by you?" He grinned. "Just so." I bit my lip. Such distinction wasn't what I had expected to be making. However, a man wouldn't have been as excited by his touch while dressed as a girl as I was. Regardless of the truth, the choice was easy. I needed to remain as his assistant. And in any case, my troubling imagination depicted me as a girl with him, and not as a man. "Would you... really treat me as a girl?" He answered with a kiss. I wrapped my arms around him and didn't let go until I gasped for breath. "Aren't you eager." He placed his hand on my rump and pushed me into his bedroom. I let him guide me to sit on the bed with him. "How did you manage to make yourself so pretty?" he whispered. I tried to control my stupid smile. "I st--" Obviously I couldn't admit that I had stolen anything. "I bought a collection of unused tonics from a pawnshop." Bemariq frowned. "That was unsafe." He didn't know the extend of it. His expression implied that he cared about my safety, at least a little. That sent a shudder through me. I needed to get something out of the current situation, and protective men were often blind to their wards. I leaned forward to kiss him. Two fingers stopped my lips. "Little vixen is getting a bit too willing." I frowned, yet the pause gave my mind a chance to restart from the swamp of lust. I had to make sure any intimacy would be to my benefit. "Oh, it's me who's eager." I made a pursed smirk. "Who's the one who keeps inviting me for dinner, while spending most of the day showcasing his admittedly impressive chest and arms?" I stood up. "This has been fun, but you have reminded me that a 'maiden' should remain decorous." Bemariq's mouth twisted but swiftly regained its smile. "Alright. Good night, miss haz-Merin." My face was warm and thoughts a swirl, when I scurried back to my tent. My breath was ragged, and my hands fidgeted, while I tried to reason myself into calmness. My hand wandered to my groin, and recoiled from how good the silk felt on it. I got out of my clothes and went to the shower. Cold water would have fixed worst of the symptoms, but only warm was available from the tent's inner reservoirs. I had to clear my mind the only way available. My hand engulfed my diminished member. I gave it the tightest squeeze I could, to see how manhandling of it would feel. I didn't dare to truly torment myself, so there was no proper agony. With Bemariq, my member wouldn't serve much purpose. Like any girl, I had my mouth to service him. That might be mildly exciting for me. Him using my other hole would be closer to the real thing. I took some of the soap from my hair into my palm, and pressed a finger against my pucker. I had to test intrusion into my butt. If it was unpleasant, I'd knew to avoid it. The first experience was discouraging. The sphincter resisted even one finger, and what had been inside the man's trousers was at least four times the girth. Yet the stretching sensation made my small dick twitch in deranged excitement. The finger sunk all the way in. An colleague, who had actually entertained men, had hinted about a 'button' inside her butt. After a short search, I was sure I had found it in myself. It was like pressing my crotch from the wrong direction. My heart thumped in a frantic beat. What would happen, if something bigger, firmer, stronger pushed against me? I eased my grip on my penis, and tried to stimulate myself from the inside. The pressure wasn't quite as strong as I would have liked, but I couldn't reach far enough. Yet I couldn't wait to figure it out. I needed my release. A few tight pulls on my member, and the tension released. The deep orgasm was more thorough than any I had experienced. As the heat faded, I was painfully aware of myself again. Here I was, in the shower, with a finger up my bum. Masturbating while imagining myself as a girl. It didn't make any sense. Having things inside one's butt had no reason to feel good. It didn't serve any biological purpose. Something must have been awry in me. I pulled my finger out and washed it with soap. Even after thorough cleaning, I could feel semen on my thigh. At least the sticky stuff wasn't inside me. I shuddered and walked out of the shower. From now on, I'd only pretend to be a girl for the job. Afterwards, I'd use my ill-gotten funds get tonic treatments to become the most masculine man I could be. I certainly wouldn't allow Bemariq to get his way with me. Enjoying that would be permanently a part of my psyche. I huddled in my bed, and tried to sleep. CHAPTER 4 The workers had been invigorated by the bonus and the promise of more, so the excavation made good progress. Perhaps I wouldn't have to stay at Rolu over the winter. I dreaded the next dinner, but I didn't have the slightest excuse for refusing. For one, I had nothing to eat in my tent. I had no reason to fear Bemariq, but I was afraid I'd lose control. The day before, I almost had. The malfunction of my body didn't take long to become apparent in the tightness of my underwear. It would have been so much easier, if Bemariq had been forceful. Then it wouldn't have been my fault, but I could have enjoyed it all the same. I grimaced from the shamefulness of my lascivious fancies. "Is something wrong with the food?" Bemariq asked. "N-no. Not at all." "Good. I forgot to mention this last evening. I'm raising your pay. You'll get another osmium sliver a day from now on." That doubled my salary. "Wh-what? Why?" "Don't you think you deserve it? I do. Truth be told, I expected only a pretty face, if even that. But you have shown competence and expertise, almost to the point of replacing zef-Wared fully. That is admirable, considering he must have had four times your age in experience." "I... Thank you. But what was the first sliver for?" "Slight secretarial duties, and being my entertainment. An unescorted young woman far from home." He smirked. "An easy target to for a man to take advantage of." Until a few days ago, I hadn't had enough money for the voyage home. I had been completely at the mercy of Bemariq. My heart beat filled my chest. I had to collect myself and stay calm. "Why haven't you 'taken advantage' of me already?" "Truth be told, when I saw you, I changed my mind." He chuckled. "You were more to my liking than I had expected, and so I wondered about the possibility of starting a family with you. You see, I'll be here possibly for quite some years, but getting a proper Conglomerate maid to come here is more than a bit difficult." I drank the bitter juice deep. "And then it turned out I was... what I am." "Do you think it's an obstacle?" "But family--" "We could rent a womb to create a chimera of ourselves." Bemariq laughed. "I'm not propositioning to you. I'm merely stating that I find you quite fetching." That was why he was paying me so much. But it wouldn't be prostitution. Gentlemen had to keep their mistresses, after all. Two slivers a day plus the other benefits was more than my career back home had paid. My vague sense of dignity, of which I had cared little of till now, had never been worth much. And I could always keep my options open, in case thievery became profitable enterprise. And even if my reason claimed I shouldn't want it, my body disagreed. "Three slivers." Bemariq choked. "What?" "Three slivers a day, in addition to my other expenses. You wouldn't want your girl to remain destitute? I want to feel secure with my finances in this faraway land." "A man could buy a dozen local girls for that sum." "Go ahead then. They presumably are very experienced and even hand out sailor's pox for free. I couldn't match that." "Very well. But you will have live in my tent from now on. So I can keep an eye on my... investment. I also expect you to perform all duties a wife would." My mind made frantic algebra. If I stayed until winter, I'd end up with more than even a rare artefact --still small enough for me to smuggle-- would pay in the black market. And Bemariq might pay for my return voyage. On the other hand, if I stayed for longer, I might be set for life. Innocence of my bottom wasn't nearly worth that. Only thing dubious was how bad the deal was for him. He must have really liked me. I bit my lip. "I accept, associate Bemariq." He nodded. "I will keep your extra pay in reserve for the next three weeks, in order to see that you take your new duties seriously." I pouted. "I guess that's fair." "Fail to please me for that time, and I will withhold it all." I squeezed my fists under the table. That wasn't quite as fair, but made sense from his point of view. "I want this contract written down." He smiled. "I'd prefer that too." A document with my fake name had nothing but symbolic value, but it alleviated my fears. Bemariq had shown himself to be an honest man. Trustworthy. Proper husband material. Of course, he was also a predator, who wanted to lure young women away from the protection of civilized society, but that was neither here or there. My maidenly reputation was not at stake. Still, signing the contract made me shiver. It was almost like a contract marriage. It handed the rights to my body to him. If he wanted to, he could force me down and have his way with me until I screamed for mercy. Of course, I could renege my part whenever, but then I'd lost my pay. Bemariq grabbed my waist and drew me into a kiss, which I eagerly answered. Strong arms crushed me. Hungry hands squeezed my buttocks. He pushed me off him. "Wait here." He soon returned with a tiny bottle. "A tonic?" "Indeed. For cleaning your intestines." "You mean..." "Yes. The treatment will make it all more convenient. The effect is not permanent, but lasts for only a few weeks." He held the bottle in front my eyes. "Do you want to drink it, my girl?" More accurately, did I want him to use my butt, repeatedly and with minimal warning. I took the bottle and poured its contents into my mouth. The sticky liquid tasted vile and squirmed on the way down my throat. "We'll have to wait for it to work itself, until tomorrow. But there is a thing, which you will do today." He lead me to the bedroom. After kissing me again, his hand guided me to sit on the bed next to him. His other arm pressed me against him, while the hand of the other traced my jaw until a finger sunk between my lips. I opened my jaw, wrapped my lips around the finger and sucked, with as innocent expression as I could muster. Bemariq chuckled. "Aren't you a piece of work. Are you sure, you haven't done this before?" "Nmuh uh," I mumbled. "Open my trousers, girl." I obeyed, and touched the ready manhood. It was huge in my hand. I peeked over his hand. My eyes flew wide. Bemariq must have found a brand of penis enhancement tonic, which did more than take the sucker's money. I pulled my mouth free. "It's huge!" Bemariq smirked. "Do you like it? Maybe you'd prefer it to the finger." This was the threshold. If I pleasured a man, out of my free will, there'd be no going back to being just an opportunist. Men could love men, but I was dressed as a girl, with enhancement to make me look like one. A man wouldn't be in my situation, let alone be excited about it. A shudder moved through my body, when I wrapped my hand around his cock. It would never fit in my butt, yet Bemariq would surely force it in, as was his right. I leaned down and opened my mouth. After a moment of hesitation, I took the bulbous head in my mouth. It didn't taste awful. I squeezed the base of his dick and moved my tongue around its head, which elicited an approving grunt from Bemariq. While I could only fit small part of the penis in my mouth, it was clearly enough to work on him. By sucking and blowing I searched for actions that made Bemariq pet my head with higher intensity. Soon enough, the rod throbbed and poured its slime into my mouth. I retched, mostly from surprise. Yet, I fought against the reflex, and managed to dispose of the semen by swallowing it. Bemariq gave my head a gentle brush. "That was great," he said. "Now, run along, girl. Return to your tent for your last night there." The next day, my gut wrenched. I was terribly ill, until nothing but clear odourless liquid poured out of me. Such alteration was strange yet much too exciting. My hole had been made ready for a man's intrusion. When I managed to get to the dig site, the workers were already packing up. "Why are we stopping for today?" I asked. "Tomorrow is the Roluan whale festival," Bemariq said. "None them will bother coming to work, and they appreciate being allowed to leave early today." "We'll drink, until we drop, miss," the Roluan passing us by said with a wide grin. "Tomorrow we regret our sins." After we were alone, Bemariq turned to me. "There's also one thing I want to do with you before evening." "And that is?" "To go shopping. I think it's time for my mistress to get some clothes." I returned light-headed from the amount Bemariq had splurged on me. Of course, it was all to his gratification. The three dresses he had chosen for me would be delivered after they had been adjusted for my body. I also got a bunch of overly girly underwear and nightclothes, and makeup to replace my dwindling supplies. Most notable item was perhaps the 'chest enhancer'. Most women only rented those creatures, but Bemariq had bought mine. He would certainly expect me to wear it. Having breasts, even small ones, would make being merely a man dressed as a girl somewhat implausible. Two of the new dresses had cleavage, and I found myself excited about the prospect of showing off soft flesh even when fully dressed. We had dined at Heva, so when we got back to Bemariq's tent, we could move on to the dessert. He handed me one of the nightwear and a ribbon. "Tie that around you." His glance downwards told that the ribbon wasn't for my neck. Furiously blushing, I retreated to the storeroom. After undressing, I carefully peeled of my corset, so I wouldn't hurt it. The ribbon was of a pleasant rose colour. I tied it in as pretty bow as I could around my penis. The symbolism of it puzzled me. Nothing so cutely packaged could be manly. In a sense it was a present now, and those were off-limits to everyone except their new owners. Bemariq would decide, if it deserved his attention. The nightwear was billowy, but translucent, so it didn't hide my body. My face was hot, when I went back to Bemariq. "Ho--" I swallowed. "How do I look?" All of me was on display. My thin arms, my crushed waist. He could see my fleshy thighs, which extended from my sizeable butt and girly hips. I should have been ashamed of how ready my diminutive member was, yet the vulnerability only thrilled me. "Come here." Bemariq had me sit on his lap. Though he wasn't that much taller than me, I was small in his embrace. He kissed my neck and buried his fingers into my soft thigh. "I'm fortunate to have you," he whispered. "How..." I panted. "How so?" "It's an honour to make a pretty thing like you into a girl, permanently." A shiver went through me. "Permanently?" "After you squirm and moan like a girl, from a dick in your butt, you won't pretend to be anything else." I could have protested. A man would have called the deal off. I merely allowed my breathing to pick up pace, as he fondled my body, which had been made so fragile by the unwise intake of tonics. It wasn't about the money any more. I needed him to force me to accept my desires, which I didn't dare to admit aloud. Afterwards I'd always be a girl, preferably his, and I would be able to enjoy all that femininity entailed. I wouldn't have to worry about getting back to being a man. My chest would expand into soft breasts. Perhaps he'd have me ingest tonics until my rod was even more dysfunctional, but so much cuter. I turned to kiss Bemariq, but he lifted me up to stand with him. He fumbled open his trousers and kicked them off his feet. The large member pressed against my nightwear. He pulled off me, and I heard the wet sound of a lube bottle. His other arm took a tight hold of my waist, while the other hand lifted the hem of my nightwear and moved between my butt cheeks. Slowly, a finger slick with lubrication coaxed itself into me. I moaned without caring how wanton it made me sound. That was the first time I had was intimately fondled. I should have been mortified by the manner of it. Yet everything save the girl in me was melting away. Bemariq was gifting me the certainty of my place in life. His finger was fully in me, and guided by my yelps, quickly found my 'button'. However, before I could enjoy it, he pulled his finger out. The manly baton, pressed between my butt cheeks, made the previous finger feel small. It wouldn't fit. Sudden unthinking terror made me lean forward, but one strong arm took both of mine behind my back. Another arm placed a hand on my throat. My veins pulsed against the grip of his fingers. "I won't be too gentle," the man whispered. "But you'll end up liking it, all the same." I let out a whimper as his dick pushed against my pucker. My body tried to squirm away, even though my reason knew there was no escape. I wailed, as his girth slowly forced itself into my convulsing hole. "Please..." I whined. "What? Do you want something? To renege the agreement, perhaps?" The head of his dick was already in me. The worst of the damage was already done, regardless of if I gave up. And my own penis was still hard from the excitement. I gasped. "Please, be gentle..." "It will get better, my little girl." The intrusion pushed against my button, yet continued further. Much further. I felt sick from the pressure inside me. And yet, though my sphincter burned, the stretching was faintly enjoyable. If I merely got used of the bad part, I'd end up enjoying the good. Still, I whimpered, when he pulled back and thrust again. The following thrust slid in easier. And so did the next one. My rear had been broken in, to be used for a man's pleasure. I couldn't pretend that I didn't enjoy the idea despite the discomfort. Tears filled my eyes. A whine escaped my mouth with every forceful plunge into me. Though the pain didn't stop, soon my moans weren't from agony. I had been like a bitch in heat, teasing the man at my peril. Now I paid the price, as the recipient of his fiery passion. The hand on my neck squeezed. Not enough to hurt, but enough to make my already dizzy head swim. I was completely under his power, and the girl I had been allowed to become loved it. His thrusts became shorter yet more powerful. Each pushed into my button, gathering more of the odd tension into my groin. The sensation made little sense, yet I revelled in it. I wasn't merely used for pleasure. Even if the intercourse was rough, I enjoyed it too, so it was making love. "Do... Do you love me?" I moaned. Bemariq grunted and eased his grip on my throat. Yet his thrusts remained strong. "Yes, girl. I love you." The tension in me shattered into a wave of relief. Completely against all reason, my penis twitched. I gazed down to see my little member squirt its load into the girly nightwear. Even though the orgasm hadn't been particularly strong, a wave of happiness filled my hazy brain. He had fucked me until I liked it. A satisfied groan. Bemariq's movements changed. He pulled out, and sticky liquid followed. It poured down from my hole all the way to my useless stones. I had barely the strength to stand, but strong arms kept me on my feet. The man turned me around, and before I could react, he pressed his lips on mine. Bemariq really loved me. I wasn't just a thing to be used, even if the smarting of my butt made it seem so. Bemariq pulled me to lay on the bed and hugged me tight. I wouldn't have resisted, even if I had the presence of mind for it. I was his, even beyond the contract. I stirred from my haze, when Bemariq stood up. He helped me to the bathroom and prepared a warm bath for me. I was still dazed. It had been my first time, and despite nothing but a cute ribbon having touched my penis, I had climaxed. My life of pretending to be a man was over, and I was content. Happy even. When I went back to the bedroom, Bemariq had changed the bedsheets, even if they hadn't been overly soiled. He smiled at me. "Are you well?" "Little fuzzy in the head, that's all." I smiled wearily. "You were too rough." "A girl should really feel her first time thoroughly, even after the fact." After washing himself, Bemariq returned and lay next to me. He pulled me into a gentle embrace, which still showed how much stronger he was of me. I didn't mind being weak, as long as he was there to hold me. CHAPTER 5 The next day proved that something had broken in my brain. I was much too happy about having been so roughly treated. Yet now I was free to enjoy my pretty clothes. And smile at men, who clearly liked the way I looked, at the whale festival. And push against Bemariq, who would kiss me, whenever I wanted. In the evening, I put the breast enhancer on my chest. It clutched tight, and the tendrils pushing into my skin itched almost to the point of hurting. Fortunately it also excreted a numbing agent, so soon only its weight was apparent. When the creature detached a week later, I had small pert tits with rather large and protruding areola. I asked Bemariq about them, and he alleviated my doubts by saying that my new breasts were just the sort a cute girl should have. Bemariq wasn't a beast. Now that I knew my place, he could be gentle and enter me slowly. It helped that my rear had been moulded from the first time. Though I enjoyed climaxing solely like a girl, sometimes I blasted my mind by fondling my own penis, while he used my butt with his. The few times, when he wrapped his strong hand around my little rod, I shivered uncontrollably from the sheer vulnerability I was forced to experience. He would coax an orgasm from me and continue on regardless of my pitiful pleas. One evening, I managed to gather the courage to tell him about my foolish plan. Bemariq laughed and wrapped his arm more firmly around me. "That doesn't matter now, does it? Even if you stole something, it would still be in my possession, as you are mine." "Are... Are you mine?" I would have accepted it, if our relationship was only one way. Nevertheless, love craved for love, and I was no exception. He kissed me on my forehead. "Yes, my pretty girl." I let out a squee of joy, which made the man pull me into heated embrace. The first downpour of the rainy season slowed our work down, but when the dig was pumped dry and properly reinforced, we were ready to try opening the large door. We were convinced now that it was some sort of vault. It had no windows, and the walls appeared to be thick enough to resist apocalyptic weaponry. Bemariq placed the primordial key on the slot. The heavy doors jerked and folded out of the way. Behind in the antechamber, the lights, which were more ancient than the founding of the Conglomerate, lit to reveal gradual stairs leading deep into the earth. With our hands clasped, I stepped over the threshold with Bemariq. THE END AUTHOR'S NOTES: What's in the vault? It might be revealed in a sequel, if there ever is one. Thank you for reading. Please leave reviews/comments. I like those. Every time I get one, I'm inspired to write more of this sordid drivel. This story is based on a personal fantasy of mine. I'd love to excavate the remnants of a spacefaring civilization. I guess the other stuff would also be nice. I mean that's 90% of this story, but all that is just filler. The sci-fi archaeology is the main course. All rights are waived on this text, CC0.