My birthday nightmare
- 3 years ago
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Hi friends of ISS I’m Sateesh 5’9” well built 42years) form Bangalore I wish to share one of my experience with all of you. Well I was working for a Pvt Co and I was the branch manager of the office it was a small sales office of 7 members We shifted our office to a new location it was actually a 3 bedroom house on the main road we found that very suitable for our kind of businesses also the rent was much less than the commercial office space as soon as we moved in lot of maids came to our...
She slid the spaghetti straps of her dress down her shoulders and then pulled her white dress it down and away from her body, and let it drop on the floor. Underneath she wore an absolutely wicked white demi-bra and panties set with a matching garter belt and stockings. In her five inch spiked heels she looked spectacular to say the least. I awkwardly hugged her and leaned over to kiss her mouth with overheated passion. She gently pushed me back with her tiny yet strong hands and taking my...
At first this was going to be a Kristie story but then it sorta morphed into a collection of shorts. Hope you all enjoy. Off To College By Wolverine CHAPTER ONE: A LITTLE EPIDEMIC "The properties of simple chemistry do not apply to this organism, if it is an organism," the professor stated to his near sleeping class. "We here at the university have no idea what this thing is or what it is composed of. So far, we have been afraid to even touch it, let alone experiment with its...
Vanakam nanbargale, indru tamil kama kathaiyil ilamaiyaana paiyanai usar seithu avan udan kanavanuku theriyamal eppadi oothen endra kathaiyai ungal idam pagirugiren. Vaarungal tamil kama kathaikul selalam, en peyar meera vayathu 35 aagugirathu enaku iru pasangal irukiraargal. Oru pen matrum oru paiyan, iruvarum school sendrukondu irukiraargal. Naan thirumanathirku munbu en vayathu aangal udan sex seithu irukiren, thirumanathirku pinbu enaku veru aangal udan udal uravu vaithukolum chance kidaika...
Hi. Mera naam Savnai aur main Mumbai ka rehnewala hu. Meri height 5.3 feets and lund ka size 6.5 inches. Meri age ab 27 years hai aur mera colour black aur physique average. Maine aaj tak 50 se zyada ladkiya aur aurato ko choda hai. Aur unmese kuch ne mere bacche ko janam bhi diya hai. Ab story pe aate hai. Ye story hai aaj se 7 saal pehle ki hai. Ye meri sex thi mere tuition teacher (Urmila) ke saath. Jo meri hi colony mein rehti hai aapne husband aur 2 baccho ke saath. Mere sex teacher ke...
Hi friends.Ye meri 1st story hai agar koi galati ho to batane ki jarurat nai.Aur ache ya dirty comment ke liye mere id par mail send kare actually ye meri girlfriend ki id Mere ghar me 4 log hai. Ma savita -40 sal ki sexy lady gianna michel ki copy. Monika -25 sal ki perfect body kasi hui model. Karishma -22 sal ki model. Raj(mai) -18 sal ka.Sabka ladla. Mere dad ki death mere janm ke 2 sal bad ho gayi uske bad sara bhar neri ma ke upar tha kyonki mere bap ne intercast marriagr ki thi isliye...
There had been times when we had driven under the bridge and her gaze was locked on to it till they had passed under, then it would switch into the review until it was gone from site completely. She had always been fascinated with it and when the long drive was silent at times when they came to the bridge he could not help to notice the way that it caused her to tense and glaze over. He laughed to himself as he thought of their plans for the day. The hike wouldn't be a long one,...
Izzy Bell and her fellow rebellious teens were stuck in detention and bored as fuck! Good thing their supervisor was shitty and fell asleep. This gave these rambunctious kids time to get their heads out of the books and start to fool around. One of the boys made a sign for Izzy and offered her cash to see her tits. She figured it was worth it, so she did it! Now the boy thought he could ask Izzy for even naughtier things. He had izzy meet him by the supervisor’s desk and start sucking his cock....
xmoviesforyouA few days had gone by and Carson couldn’t get Mr. Armisen off his mind. It was becoming a sick little game of his as he went about his day, imagining the various places he and Armisen could fuck. Maybe after hours in the jacuzzi. Maybe go to town in the elevator. Or maybe right here, in front of everybody, out in the hotel lobby--“Carson,” Clarissa snapped. “You’re doing it again.”He blinked. “What?”“I can tell you’re fantasizing about Mr. Armisen,” she said smugly.“Who wouldn’t?” Caron said...
Gay MaleMarquis was a double letter man in high school. He played basketball and ran track. His god-like physique had not stood the test of time. Not blubbery. Just pudgy. 32 loomed in the air, just two months away. Marquis worked third shift at Wally World. Finally!! He had made management! Today was Marquis’ forth month as manager and his second year on the ‘C-Team’. He had long since gotten used to the shift and needing to wake up at 5:00 pm. Not a problem. He lived about 45 minutes from work...
She’d been across the country close to nine years now, vowing never to return seeing as daddy did things with mommy’s best friend, but seeing as now her parents are no longer married she decided it was as good a time as any to come home. Daddy moved away. It was only Jessie and Peter, and Peter was about to go away to college. About to turn 19 in November, Clarisse felt she had to see him seeing as she hadn’t seen any of them in all these years, and Peter and the brother had been bugging their...
IncestI often wonder what became of Jeffrey Dillerman. He was in my year at school, a weedy kid with glasses, known to one and all as “Dildo”, he used to get bullied a lot and unfortunately I was responsible for much of it. I was forever picking on him. It went much further than teasing and making fun, I fucking terrorized this poor kid. I bullied him day in and day out for an entire year. I was not alone in this, there were other boys who persecuted Dildo, there were a few girls who did too, but I...
It all began by chance. I happened across LC’s profile on xhamster. The vid and pics she posted mesmerized me. Never in my life had I seen a clit so large and luscious it made me jerk off while watching her satisfy herself. I kept on replaying her short vid, and me, blowing load after load of cum till my tank was empty. There are many clips of women toying with their clits on hamster, but LC is different. I could actually feel her taking care of herself. I usually never add comments. This time...
It is a wonderful evening as I write this story and I am sitting on a chair with the lips of one of the hottest girl I have ever met stuck on my cock. She is sucking it like a vacuum and rolling her tongue over it. And here I how I met this girl. I had posted a story a few months ago on this site with my email-id, i.e. . I used to think that it must be a male dominated site who are here to share their experiences. But to my surprise I got the mail of a girl – named Bhavna – who said she really...
The Boss over for dinner pt2We have had the Boss over quite a lot since that first night, also we have had weekends away. Jim has tried to get Anne involved, but she is not interested ,still, what we share between us is great.The green envy did surface one time as Carol offered Jim her virgin arse, and I watched as at first she squealed with pain and then her sobs turned to cries of lust as she told him, in no uncertain terms to fuck her inside out “Shove your 9ins up my hole” she yelled as...
Dave found Jeff in the gym working out on one of the machines. Jeff nodded at his friend and kept working, "Did your monkey suit fit?" "Yeah, but I'm not wearing that thing." "Yeah, you will," Jeff huffed out as he pulled the bars to him. "Is that an order?" Jeff stopped and looked at him. "Of course not. Where did that idea come from?" "Then I'm not wearing it." "Yeah you will." "Damnit, Jeff. If you're not ordering me to, then why in the hell do you think I will?...
NAME : Rira Basu MAIL ID: Prothomei bole rakhi…eta kono banano golpo ba uponnays noy….eta amar nijer jibon er sompurno sotti ghotona….ISS e ami bohu din dhore royechi…kintu r age ami konokichu likhini…etai amar prothom lekha. ISS ke sotti osonkho dhonnobad…karon ISS er incest lekhaguli porei ami amar jiboner ei sotti kotha guli ekhane bolte agrohi hoyechi…..lekhar ageo ami onekbar vebechi je amar jiboner ekanto goponiyo kothaguli sobai ke janano ta thik hobe kina…emonki amar cheleo amay...
Facing his father, Michael nearly fainted. He felt his vision start to go black and fought it. He lost for a moment, but he remembered to breath as his father patted the chair next to him. Mike walked forward slowly and took the chair, pale and shaking in the face of punishment. What&hellip, What are you going to do&hellip,? How did you find&hellip, Wha&hellip,? Michael didnt know which question he wanted to ask. He wanted so much to just run away, go after Candy and stay with her. But his...
Hello friends, I am Saurabh Sharma and I’m back with another encounter happened last night. For readers who don’t know me , let me introduce myself (other can skip it :p ) Well I am working in pune in a reputed it company located in hinjewadi (punekar readers must be knowing), and I live in a posh society in wakad (near dutta mandir)I am 24 and have been god gifted with 6 feet height, athletic built as I am gym addicted stud :-p, charm on the face (as a compliment by girls at the office ) and...
Hi……………..All…….Ladies and girls……..Myself love , fair person from mumbai…..I am 6 ft and have nice dick enough to satisfy a woman…. So coming to the story.. This is about my maami and me which happened around 2 months ago….I used to live at their house due to my studies ..Firstly i had no bad feelings towards her in early days but as the days passed i started to like her boobs…. They were making me crazy……As she had given birth to son just 6 months ago.. So i was too much attracted towards...
Rio Grande Part 2 In Part 1, I was fucked by a couple of bisexual students and left with just a pair of boxers and my shoes after a rather intense session. My friend Jim and I plot to play a trick on them in return. Unlike some of the first part, this really is wishful thinking! The idea that Jim had planted about playing a trick in return on Jo and Pat had been at the back of my mind for a couple of days now. Part of the planning was to try to find where they were in a wilderness of over...
On the Friday following she arrived at the family home of Mike, the boy who had identified her as the babysitter, she was dreading meeting him again but could not get out of it without having to explain. The parents told her they would be out late and not back until after 1:00am at the earliest. The daughter must go to bed by 9:00pm and their son, Mike, was in his room and should not need anything, he was normally out with his friends but would usually go to bed by 10:30 to 11:00. All she...
The alarm went off at 4:45 AM. That was a nice nap. I killed the alarm and peeled myself away from Keri’s sleeping embrace and got out of bed. Shambling off to the toilet I relieved myself and jumped in the shower. I shaved and rinsed and dried off in about eight minutes. I quietly opened the door and quietly walked out to the dresser opened the top drawer and pulled out underwear and socks. “Don’t hide that yet.” A sleepy voice mumbled. “Sorry hon, Go back to sleep.” “I love you.” “I...
Her face started to tingle as she felt my warm breath and soft lips on her face. As I shut the door she went to the kitchen to place the roses in a vase asking me, "How long are you going to be here?" I replied "I don’t know. I only bought a one-way ticket." Her heart dropped as I said that. Could John be the one she thought? John had traveled hundreds of miles just to see her for the first time. How did she find such a sweet romantic guy like him? Could this be true love? As all of...
Centuries of work had been wasted. Leonis had been a tool, but a useful one, and now he was dead. Unable to control his anger, Pallisur Traveled into The Lady’s domain, which had changed since the last time he’d seen it. It now resembled one of the expensive apartments on the top level of West Tower in Tir Yadar. In the totemic realm, reality was subject to the whims of those who had mastered its magics. “Hera!” he shouted. “What did you do?” “Exactly what I said I would,” said a voice from...
Samantha’s Dubai NightmareSynopsis: A petite, gorgeous 19-year-old blonde American gets lured into working for an escorting agency in Dubai. Once there, she is quickly sold into slavery and forced to pleasure her owner in the most terrible of ways.Chapter 1: An Offer Too Good to Refuse ?So,? Malia Jackson said, leaning forward and smiling at the young blonde across from her. ?Have you thought about what Kyle told you? About the Dubai gig?? ?I have, I don’t—I’m still not sure...
You're sitting in a MacDonald's, your head cupped in your hand as you refresh your hotmail page for the thousandth time. I stopped responding and you feel your heart sink. What on earth is she doing?? You look at your watch, it's almost time for you to go. You wanted to get your raging urges written down in an email before you left, but I'm not responding, so you figure this is as good time as any to get back on the road. You sigh and close your laptop with a snap, standing up. You turn around...
The big tits bounced up and down as the woman rode the cock. As she was leaning back, you could clearly see that it was up her arse that she was being taken and that she was sticking a dildo in her fanny.“Ted, we should go.” Edward sighed and shut down the browser. Much as he liked watching sex, he didn’t get much time with his mother who was always busy. Today he was taking her to London Zoo where he could show off his expertise. Whilst his mother, Laura, was a top financial wizard, Ted was...
.a{fill:none;stroke:gray;stroke-linecap:round;stroke-linejoin:round;stroke-width:3px;} Bottom Wolves and Dragons of the Blood: True BeginningsChapter 30Copyright© 2015 by Mike Cropo
The guys were busy I was hoping I could get in without them noticing that I was late. Randy saw me come in and motioned for me to come into his office. I saw a half full glass of whiskey on his desk. "What happened to you girl?" Randy asked as I sat down. "I went to lunch with Ann and just lost track of time." "Don't make a habit of it." he said taking a drink of the whiskey. "Okay." I stretched with my arms over my head, put my hands behind my neck and arched my back. He was...
I knew it was going to be a different Spring Break when I saw the 6'3" 250 lb guy climbing onto the balcony of our second-floor room at the Holiday Inn. My two buddies, Jeff and Rollie, and I were heading out for some food, but I figured we might want to check on the action outside. The big guy waved at us and proceeded to look up. I headed over, opened the sliding glass door and asked him what was going on. Big grin. "I'm tryin' to climb to those chicks on the 6th floor." I looked up. There...
EroticMy name is Paul. I'm a thirty-four-year-old man from Massachusetts. I work for a company that manufactures, installs and tests industrial braking systems, couplings and bearings. My job requires extensive travel around the country, approximately two hundred days a year. I am not, nor have I ever been, married. Because of the fact that I work a lot and travel extensively, my sex life is very boring. I spend quite a bit of time in airports and hotels. I eat dinner alone and spend most nights on...
HardcoreHey mai Kanu ek bar phr apke liye ek nai story laya hoon, i hope ki mere baaki stories ki tarah aapko ye bhi pasand ayegi, story padne k bad apne comments jarur bheje par mai apke mails ka intezar karung. Ye kahani jyada purani nai hai, yun kahe to bas kal hi ki hai, hua yun ki mere story padhne k bad mujhe ek mail aaya mail pe ek ladki thi uski mail id sexydollsoniya k naam se thi, usne mere story ki tariff ki aur kaha ki kya hum friends ban sakte hai, maine kaha haan lekin problem ye thi ki...
Continued And to my luck my rowdy friends were not taking her up on her offer. Amit pulled her closer by her chin saying, “Isn’t that what you want my little bitch?” I was shocked to hear such language by him and I think she was too because she gave no reply and he kissed her again, hard and mauled her breasts with both his hands. She was offering no resistance as he continued his onslaught and Ron was now furiously rubbing her pussy on her shorts and making a wet spot on it. Krish was rubbing...
A guest blogpost I wrote a few years back. People here might dig it....She was kneeling in front of me, naked. This happens a lot.She was breathless too. Not from thrashing about, I realised – though there had been an agreeable amount of the bouncy stuff prior to this particular moment – but from something more subtle. A tiny gasp, reminded me that some joys are so exquisite to contemplate, that you momentarily forget to breathe. This doesn’t happen as much.She looked up at me, eyes wide, lip...
Chapter 21: Interactive Love Deirdre’s Story Our little girl has changed our lives. Something – hypnotism, magic, psychic brain surgery – has moved our relationship to a place we never knew existed. It’s what I suspected about our children all along. But I never expected it for my husband or my sister or myself. We long ago had recognized that the children ‘touched’ each other with their emotions. Andrew calls it telempathy. But I must say that I was the first one of us to recognize the...
My wife's first affair was set when the company i work for got bought out and we became worried that i might be laid off. Flora reluctantly agreed that she would get a job. this way we have something to fall back on if i got laid off. she ended up getting work as a secretary for a real estate broker. soon after she started, however, flora got upset and wanted to quit her new boss, James, requested that she wear more revealing clothes to the office to help boost sales. I've always been proud...
The weeks grinded by until finally in early July we were packed in the car on our way to sunny Florida. It took us two days to get to our final destination but once we did, we all agreed that the long hours in the car were worth it. The first few days of lounging on the beach and swimming in the Gulf were pretty uneventful. Monday and Tuesday flew by and after a long day of tanning on Wednesday, we were pretty worn out by the evening. My parents left for Miami around six because my parents,...
Answering a few questions about herself got Miki Uemura very curious and horny. The guy took his time first slowly unbuttoning her shirt and playing with her big tits and delicious nipples. Then it was time to rib her pussy over her cute panties. Her hairy pussy was already wet when he brushed aside her panties and fingered her hole. Of course he needed to have his dick sucked on as he grabbed and squeezed her fun bags. Then it was an all-out assault on her pussy as he fucked her in every...
xmoviesforyouNikki had to leave the waiting room. She couldn't breathe in there. She wanted to forget everything. Her life before Linda was a blur now. So much had happened, so much had changed inside her. And she was losing her... She was losing Linda and she couldn't bear the thought of it. Nikki stepped outside to the parking lot. She put her arms around herself, a self-embrace full of despair. 'Linda... Linda... please, don't leave me... PLEASE.' Nikki closed her eyes, trying to put out of her...
The flight from Don Muang to Chiang Mai was rather pleasant in first class. Even though the welts on her bottom had mostly faded away during the last three days, Simone still felt a little sore sitting on her backside. She was wearing a Ralph Lauren outfit just purchased in a Bangkok mall: Thompson skinny jeans that hugged her curves like a second skin, designed to show off her backside. The ankle-high black leather boots had four inch heels that clicked noisily wherever Simone walked, drawing...
Mrs Lane wanted more drink, she had really got the taste for it now and while I stayed naked sitting in my chair opposite her and while her knees were still parted a bit I still have the view of the little red triangle, she seemed apologetic about ravaging my cock but confided that although she had been married for 20 years her sex life had been non existent for quite a while and although she didn’t say exactly how long she did say ‘years’ so it was no wonder she ravaged me as I think I had...
This is based on a story about me, the author and is a reflection of me in size and style. Nick was 19 and at college in England. He’d lived there for 7 years after emigrating with his family. He was small at 5”7 and only 60 kg. He was very slim and was a great looker, although quite feminine. He used to run for the school so was fit as well and had several girlfriends in the past few years but none of them were stable. He’d always had a fetish of black silk stockings and whenever he had sex,...
GayIt's been hard to focus with so many ladies in the house these months after dad died in a car crash. I've been feeling spread thin since everyone is always so demanding of attention now that there's one less man in the house. I swear everyone is just so needy now, but I guess everyone has their own way of adjusting. I am John, but you knew that already. It's time to meet my family. Michelle is the youngest and she's such a girly girl, always reading pop magazines an such. She's a little curvy...
Incest“So, with the help of a black angel and a white Prophet, the Black Zone has captured Frederick Towne Mall. What else can we take? And why are you guys naked? Isn’t that dangerous?” the chairman of the Black Zone Liberation Council, who at least nominally served as the zone forces’ commander-in-chief, inquired of us now. “Well, Mr. Chairman, it might under some circumstances be dangerous, yes, but we have had divine favor and protection, as you can see. There was some kind of intuition or...
“Shit! I don’t believe it! That’s Mrs. Robinson!” Greg gasped as we turned the corner on our way home from the gym were we both worked. “Mrs. Robinson; like in the movie?” I asked. “Not really. I told you about Karen, didn’t I?” he continued, “this is her mum,” as we walked towards a middle aged, tartly dressed, bottle blonde, woman who was just the right side of being fat. “Oh! Karen!” I grinned as stories of Greg’s teenage sexual conquests shot through my mind. “Mrs. Robinson?” Greg asked as...
EroticOur lovely friend ? Kyler Quinn wanted to do a special “Airtight” scene, so we teamed her up with Damion Dayski, Danny Steele and Oliver Flynn for this week’s special Hussie?Pass update. Urban Dictionary defines “Airtight” as: “(The) Practice of filling all 3 orifices of a female by either penis, or objects. A penis in the ass, pussy and mouth at the same time, or a combination of penis and vibrator/dildo”. Well, I can say we covered all those bases! After a quick pre-sex interview, the...
xmoviesforyouA Turkish DelightByBuck JonesGood looking Umut, with his twenty-something soccer player’s body, walks to the barbershop for a shave and a trim at the Sevilberber. He takes his seat and sees a couple men are there before him. He listens half-heartedly to the banter among familiar clients. When the door to the back-store room opens, the noise pulls Umut’s attention. Coming out of the darkness, Umut sees a vision of young male beauty: blonde, blue-eyed and fair skinned with a sweet mouth,...
When Lola awoke later that afternoon at home, her hands slid immediately to her ravaged cuntal slit. God, it was sore! But the discomfort up between her legs faded into insignificance when compared to the black wave of shame which engulfed her. As she recalled the debauching scene earlier in the day with Foster and Denise, the humiliated young wife turned, burying her head in the pillow, as if trying to shut out a nightmare. She lay there sobbing for a moment, knowing that she couldn't go...
In the deep of the nightI search for the lightWandering aimlesslyWeeping so shamelesslyA part always longingThis need for belongingFor what am I searchingIn this hapless lurching?This need to fulfillTake all my free willSubmissive desireKeep building the fireLike a fog slowly liftingThe current is shiftingThe fires are burningThe waves begin churningColors aplentyThe fire has manyThe waves a deep hueOf the most wanton blueThe mixture collidesAs the Master guidesAnd suddenly I findIt’s unwritten...
Hi,i am Ajay meri saasuji ka naam nilam hai pyar se sasurji nimmo,niru kehte hai age-52 (dikhti 36 saal ki) rang-savla height-5-5′ hips(gaand)-35 inch breast(mummey,bobbey)-40 inch, chutad bade-bade aur bhare-bhare mummey bhi bade-bade aur bhare-bhare kamar 32 inch rang savla,hoth normal se thode bade jo ki laal lipstick mein sharab ki bottle lagte hain.kehne ka matlab hai sasuji ka sharir aam aurton se jiyada bada hai moti nahi hai bus sharir ka size bada hai. Din mein salwar kamiz pehanti hai...
Incest"Can I get you something to drink?" The words echoed softly in the contemporary kitchen with the tall ceilings. "I'm sorry?" I asked distractedly as I wiped some sweat from my forehead."I've got black tea, juice, Diet Pepsi, iced coffee...I suppose it's too early for a beer."I chuckled. "Yeah, I think so," glancing at the clock on the microwave reading 9:35AM, "let's save the party for when we're done. Ice water is great, thanks."She smiled and opened the freezer; the frosty-cold air poured out...
Dear Readers, This is in continuation to me earlier story of my first sexual encounter with my employee Shez. Since our first sexual session in the car on that Rainy day we didn’t had any eyeball contact and hardly felt the need to see each other. We didn’t even talk to each other and behaved as if nothing had happened. Everything was as normal as before the said incident. One fine day on Saturday almost some twenty days after the incident I felt desire to have her again. I called her to my...
Well I've never considered myself straight as Ive always appreciated a nice big cock though I've never realy done anything other than being sucked off many time through gloryholes in mens toilets when I was as horny as hell.So I’m driving back south on the A34 from Oxford. And see someone thumbing. Its Christmas so I pull over. I say I’m going as far as the A303 and says OK and hops in. He’s a young lad and after a while tells me he’s been with his girlfriend but he’s annoyed as she wont let...
Partially edited by Alexis Siefert Copyright © 2002, 2003 The "Knights" portion of this story was originally submitted as an entry to the Virago Blue Challenge as a flash story (under 1000 words). It contained no sex, but maintained continuity with the rest of the "Chocolate Morsels Universe." A follow-up was always intended. "Daze" is that follow-up. I wasn't happy with it. I decided to submit it to a jury of my peers, in the best forum for improvement in the alt.sex.stories...
Note : This story is completely fictional! We live in a small town in western NY, not much goes on there really. Kate, or was home for spring break from college and as usual, complained of nothing to do. Now kat is the spitting image of her mother except her breasts are much larger and of course firm. A solid 38 D, on her frame it looks hot, 5'8 and 140 pounds of pure hotness. ats mom was away for a week staying with her mother, helping her move into her new house so Kat and I were alone. I...
IncestHey, darlings. This is your Harish back again. Thanks to all of you for your response to my previous story. Also special thanks to my horny girl fans who showered their love for all . A quick re-introduction about myself: I am Harish (name changed) from Coimbatore, Tamil Nadu. Age 24. Fair complexion. I go to the gym regularly. So have a strong, firm & athletic body. Have a 7 inch brownish dick with a good width. I am 6 feet in height and 70 kg in weight. New readers, I request you to read the...
by Honey West Life in a small town could be pretty dull. As a native Californian, Tom was completely out of synch with his new environment. His parents had shipped him off to a small "bible belt" college in the middle of a cow pasture, hoping against hope that the conservative atmosphere would reform his wild and wicked ways. What were those wild and wicked ways? Many and varied. By 18, he'd saved a tidy sum of money from mowing lawns, running weird errands for a local porn shop, and...