Master's Sissy Slave - Chapter 8 - Moulding free porn video

Chapter 8 - Moulding The rest of the weekend and the next week fell into a similar pattern. My days had now started to become so busy that by the time Master would finish using me for the night I would fall into an intense and deep sleep. The irony being that my body was used and abused beyond anything I would have ever imagined but I would fall to such a deep and contented sleep that I had never known. My mind would wake up so refreshed, whereas my body would wake up sore and usually covered in welts. Morning routines, secretarial duties, maid duties, my training regime, preparing Masters food and of course the now ever increasingly intense nightly training sessions left me wiped. As the days and weeks went by I became more compliant and as planned I began to revel and enjoy the pain and submission. Master's appetite for using me grew beyond anything I thought was possible. As I said before I was a single cum and then sleep guy. Maybe with a hot woman I could recover after and hour or so but Master was relentless. Apart from when Master was on holiday and I was loaned to other Masters and Mistresses I would wake up with Masters tool in my mouth or pussy. I would naturally give Master two to three long slow blow-jobs throughout the day. He would take me during the torture sessions usually twice but sometimes even three times and then after as I was cleaned up and ready for bed he would again. I was always tied up in a straitjacket to sleep in Masters bed which I had begun to love, I knew that I could no longer sleep or rest without being in bondage but before sleep Master would have me face down pussy up and then ram home. If this isn't the best type of love anyone can receive then I don't know what is. The week continued in the fashion I described until before I knew it Friday had come again and it was time for our weekly visit to the club. As I have said before and Master clearly knew humiliation in public was one of the few things left that he truly had to break of me. I needed to be happy and content to be his sissy slave no matter the location or the crowd. Waiting in my slave position in my patented white outfit, White ballet boots, white stockings connected to my white corset and my chastity and collar master came and fitted my arms into a brutal white arm binder which fused my arms together at the elbows and drew my shoulders back. I had started to secretly crave the arm binder, controlling me in such a strong and uncompromising manner and allowing Master full access to my body with no chance of defending myself, not that I would ever dream of it at this stage. I had dyed my hair platinum blonde earlier on as per Masters orders and with my bright pink lipstick and eyeshadow I stood for half and hour admiring my stunning figure in the mirror before assuming my position. Pulling a white latex hood over me and slowly working in a humongous white ball gag that stretched my jaw as wide as I thought possible, Master threw the white coat over me and attaching a leash to my collar led me up the stairs and into the boot of his car. Walking the street was as always humiliating and Master always liked to greet his friends and chat for a while outside the club, clearly in an attempt to humiliate me more. It was a good job I was hooded as I must have been blushing bright red in my cheeks. Master had already informed me that my time today would be nowhere near as brutal as last week which eased my anxiety considerably. Instead he told me that because I had become such a cock craving slut I would probably consider this a reward. Hearing the masters and mistresses laughter around me made me blush even more. I was so affected by these comments because I knew it was true. I couldn't go half an hour without thinking about sucking or fucking a cock. After an agonising thirty minutes outside I was taken downstairs by a slave and tied with my hands behind my back. My body was supported by 3 bars holding my hips, waist and just above my breasts keeping me in a horizontal position. The Slave had wrapped a rope around my hair and pulled it back so that my head was pulled back and was held in the perfect position to give oral Just as I was about to be locked in position I heard a commotion outside and the doors flung open with mistress Janice appearing. "It's your lucky day sissy," she snarled and from the leash she was holding harshly pulled Ruby into the room who almost fell over. Looking at Ruby she was in a state of panic and crying her eyes out. "This useless sissy just ruined my last client of the days manicure so she will be taking your place tonight." Mistress Janice demanded perfection like my Master so I knew that even this slight infraction would be dealt with heavily. With that I was unattached and a crying Ruby was fitted in my place. Master however was planning on treating me relatively lightly this evening as a reward for my progression over the past week. Mistress Janice had no such intent as Ruby needed to be corrected. She slowly wrapped Ruby's breasts the same way mine had been last week with each layer digging in painfully, and once complete with 4 bands crushing each breast she added crocodile clamps to her nipples with large weights dangling below. I could already see the strain in Ruby's eyes and did not envy her one bit. Her legs were spread apart and heavy clamps added to her ovaries. Knowing the pain all to well I felt sorry for her but was glad I wasn't in that position. Ruby would spend the next 8 hours like this servicing cocks and pussys all night long. After watching Ruby get ready I was taken back to my Masters table and kneeled next to him whilst he was deep in conversation. Just as Master was going to command me to do something his friend the owner of the club Master Richard arrived. Explaining that one of his waitresses had called in sick he requested that I take her place for the evening. Master readily agreed as he was keen to show off how well trained and submissive I had become, he also knew that going from table to table serving Masters and Mistresses would aid in my training and humiliation. Of course without hesitation I was led into the back to prepare as a waitress for the evening. Most of the bartenders and waitresses were not slaves but submissive's who enjoyed the lifestyle and got paid handsomely for their services to the club so the room where they prepared for the evening was relatively normal with dressing tables and wardrobes full of different outfits around. The lady leading me however was a slave and explained very clearly the difference. I was to serve 3 VIP tables rotating between each table obeying every order that was requested of me. The other waitresses also had to obey orders but got paid for it. The money that I earned for the evening would of course go straight to Master. So with some excitement and a huge amount of anxiety I was dressed in my waitress outfit., which was that of a sexy bunny girl. The slave left my corset, chastity and collar on as only Master was allowed to remove these. I stepped into tight black latex bunny outfit that barely covered my chastity device up over my hips leaving a large section of my ass and upper thighs free. The outfit stretched up to my breasts stopping just below my nipples and providing a tiny shelf to push my breasts up and out even further. 2 straps went over my shoulders and down my back where the outfit stopped just above the small of my back. Around my Collar a thick latex bow tie in black and white was attached. With my mask removed the slave redid my make-up keeping the bright pink look and my earnings were replaced with a long chain that had a carrot dangling down. I wore black fishnet stockings and black 6 inch wedges as I would be moving a lot during the evening. My final pieces was a pair of white fluffy bunny ears and a gigantic butt plug with a huge fluffy tail sticking out. My arms were then sealed in an arm binder behind my back and a tray was wrapped around my waist with chains securing it in position by hooking through my piercings in my nipples. A final chain was used to connect it to my collar for added reinforcement. I looked the absolute image of sexy slutty and submissive and as always my clitty strained against her cage. I was led back to the front where the tables I would serve each contained approximately 6-8 Masters or mistresses and I was happy to see my Master would be one of the tables I would serve. The job was of course very easy to do but I strove to do it in the best possible manner. I would walk to a table courtesy (with my arms fused behind my back) and ask for the drink orders which I memorised instantly and relayed to the bartender. The bartender would place the drinks n the tray which would pull against my nipples but no pain that I hadn't felt ten times worse from Master. I would then very carefully return to the tables where another waitress would remove from the tray and serve the guests. Once all the tables were served I would be at the service of whoever wanted my rapidly improving oral skills. Thankfully of the tables I served I didn't recognise anyone which was to my great relief. In fact it was kinda fun to serve and see all the guests having a great time. After I had served the first round of drinks the entertainment for the evening began and I saw others raise from the stage below in the predicament I had last weekend. Tonight was a relatively easy night for the slaves as the entertainment, a simple (Simple! A few months ago I would have considered this horrific) gang bang of each of them with Ruby's mistress adding her own torments solely to her slave. Master was right as much as I was loving to serve deep down I wished that was me at the attention and mercy of the guests. The night wore on and some guests came and went. A highlight of my evening was when the Master and sissy of last weeks events turned up. Instantly I could see that she was now significantly more submissive and had been broken in quickly by her Master. A shemale turned to sissy similar to myself, I could see her clitty constrained and fighting to get free and I thought she just looked delicious. My Master seeing this commanded my to come over and kneel. "Do you like her Jessica?" Looking into my Masters eyes there was only one answer "Yes Master I think she is gorgeous." After some exchanges with the shemales master I was introduced to sissy Kimberly. With Master requesting items from Master Richards stores we were soon tied up in an elaborate frame. Kimberly was tied as I was in a strict arm binder and we were standing about 4 feet apart with our legs vertical but bent at the waist. My arms were hoisted up in the air and through a section of pulleys connected to my nipple piercings. Quickly I realised that if I dropped any slack in my arms then the wire would pull my nipples out in a painful way. Kimberly was also secured in the exact same manner. Then machined dildos were lubed up and lined against our pussy and a large double ended dildo placed between us which lined up with our mouths, The dildo had a strange ring at either end that I assumed I could push along the length and it looked like it would snap back to the edge if no pressure was applied on it. Finally a vibrating wand was placed against both of our chastity devices and I instantly felt a low hum driving my clitty crazy. "Now," declared my Master, "the looser is the one that cums first and let me tell you that you do not want to face the punishment we have in store if you cum in this game. It will last an hour or until one of you fails." Master then came close to me and gently whispered in my ear. "If you don't make her cum Jessica I will whip that sexy ass raw so that you would be able to sit right for months." At this moment I was confused as I didn't realised what I could do to make her cum but of course I replied "yes master". Looking in Kimberly's eyes I could tell her Master had told her something similar. So with the declaration of the game beginning I proceeded to move my ring along the shaft of the dildo. Kimberly followed suit and we both realised that the location of the ring along the dildo determined the vibration our sissy sister would feel. So the faster and deeper I managed to service the dildo would increase the vibrations from Kimberly's wand but thankfully also reduce the vibrations I was subjected to. As much as I found her gorgeous and didn't want to see her come to harm I was out to prove to my Master that he was right to pick me and I was the only sissy in the world for him. It became apparent very quickly that I was far superior in my oral skills and that Masters amazing tool along with his deep throat training meant I could do deeper and faster than Kimberly. I could see the tears forming and the pleading in Kimberly's eyes but I knew anything less than perfection would be punished and of course the effect on Master's reputation. After 30 minutes Kimberly was panting. She was focusing so much on avoiding the orgasm that she wasn't able to concentrate on the dildo and the vibrations all but stopped on my side. After 40 minutes she was done. I could tell that it just needed a tiny push so I took the dildo as deep as I ever had almost gagging completely on it but staying true to my aim. As soon as I pushed the ring past the halfway point of the dildo the vibrator against Kimberly's clitty went into overdrive and through the tears in her eyes I could see her explode in an orgasm that had long been denied her. As I continued to hold the dildo so far down my throat I thought it was in my stomach I felt a pang of jealousy for the orgasm that Kimberly was having, this quickly passed however when her Master clearly unhappy with her performance came to release her. As soon as she was free dropping to her knees. "Master pleas, I'm sor..." Slap right across her face. "Not a word you useless sissy," he commanded. Kimberly's master then proceeded to take her to the centre of the room and tie her up with the other slaves to be available for anyone to use for the rest of the evening. Again the slut deep down inside me wished that I was the one down there receiving all the attention but as my Master came and whispered into my ear "good girl" I knew that nothing compared to the feeling of my masters praise. After this frustrating but fun interlude I went back to serving the VIP area until it was time for us to go home. Returning the bunny outfit and redressing as I had arrived Master led me back to his car with a leash connected to my collar. As we left we passed Ruby who was still being used thoroughly and had a large number of welts across her body. Her Mistress did not take kindly to failure and ensured that everyone who had used her that night made it clear by giving her a mark. I also did not envy the sight of her breasts still bulging from the straps and with a number of clear red marks across them that Mistress Janice had provided on occasion through out the evening. Passing Ruby I was happy and proud that I had served my Master correctly and hoped he would be proud of my display. Returning home from the club for once not having passed out I prepared for be with my usual jacket on and lovingly service Masters penis. After sucking his tool gently and tenderly Master threw me on my back and looked deeply in to my eyes. This stare was always so intense that instinctively in submission I looked away. "Into my eyes Jessica." I turned my gaze back into his strong eyes and felt him deep inside my mind. "you were fantastic tonight Jessica." With that praise I was on another level, I had made Master so proud and happy with me. Before I could contemplate this I felt Master enter me and then pull my face towards him and felt the most intense and amazing kiss I had ever had. Master kissed my so long and deep that I almost lost myself then and there with his gorgeous tool slamming in and out of his pussy. The kiss lasted forever to me (but in reality was over in minutes). Of course my lessons were now second nature to me and I was using my pussy muscles to squeeze Masters tool for all my life. This resulted in a truly new and amazing experience. As Master penetrated me with my legs above my head feeling his penis rub tantalisingly against my prostate I could feel it slowly building inside me. My breath started to become rugged and I was lost in this feeling with Master. Master could tell instantly and whilst he was using me as he wanted he looked me in the eye's and simply said "no Jessica." I knew exactly what he meant. It didn't matter that I was being fucked as a sissy. No orgasms were permitted without Masters permission. At this moment in time it was the hardest thing in the world. All my concentration was on squeezing and pleasing Maser whilst containing my own desires. I knew that if Master gave me permission I would explode instantly but without permission I would not dare. After 5 more agonisingly heavenly minutes I felt Master tenses and pump his wonderful seed inside me. I felt so satisfied at serving Master but so unfulfilled with my own lust. With these thoughts swirling around inside my head I drifted off to a comfortable sleep embraced once again in my Masters arms. ------------------------------------------------------------------------- Master informed me in the morning that due to my acceptable performance last night I had earned an additional credit, which I vowed to keep rather than spend for a better reward. The days and the week returned to my normal routine with my sessions in the evening slowly getting more and more extreme. My lust was now at almost uncontrollable levels and I would take any opportunity to rub slightly against Master craving his touch at any opportunity. Of course Master loved that I was so addicted to him but this was still an act of disobedience so every time I did this I was duly corrected afterwards. By Thursday of that week I was loosing control of any semblance of the man I had once been. Bound in the dungeon ropes cutting through my breasts, Master had taken a page out of Master Starks book and began to inflict glorious torture against my beautiful breasts. My arms and legs were secured to a cross and my clitty free from it's cage erect with all it's power. Master had started to intensify these sessions and now I was facing a crop whilst my breasts bound as they were had suction cups that slowly massaged me. My Clitty was fitted with a similar suction device emitting low levels of vibration which kept me on the edge but never enough to go over to an orgasm. Finally my favourite a replica of Masters glorious penis was pumping inside and out of my pussy. It was this time that I experienced something truly wonderful about being Masters slave. In the haze of the pain and pleasure and unyielding lust that I had, I lost track of all thoughts and time and could only focus on the sensations that was being applied to my body. It was at this time I felt complete as an object. I was no longer a human being just a toy for Master to play with. This gave me a wonderful sense of freedom, I could no longer deny or pursue, I had no options but to obey the will of my Master and his desires. The realisation washed over me and I found myself drifting in an endless abyss of light my only connection being the almost blissful feeling of pleasure and pain. I could no longer differentiate between the two feelings as long as I was Masters this would be my heaven. How long this lasted for I could not remember but the next thing I remember was coming out of the daze with Master in front of me talking. Instantly I apologised fearing Masters anger at not listening to his words. "Master I apologise I did not hear what you said. Master I had drifted somewhere else." Of course Master had been planning this and knew exactly what had happened, I had drifted off into a sub space of pure submission and bliss. "Jessica, this was the plan for you. You are so hopelessly submissive to me that you will serve me for life. I am training you to be a pain slut that dreams of nothing more than serving my desires. Eventually the though of serving me will provide you such joy that it will consume your entire world." The thought of that filled me with sheer delight and slight concern. I knew I belonged to Master and he would mould me into his toy, but now I knew that any semblance of my former self would be eradicated completely and Jessica would exist only as Masters Toy for ever. The concern cleared quickly after all Justin was an arrogant, narcissistic person. Who would want to be that man or even related to the person he once was. No I was happy that Master would erase all existence of him from my personality. I was here on this planet only to serve Master and no other reason. That night drifting to sleep with Masters cum lodged in my pussy I smiled as I drifted off to the best sleep of my life. Waking up in a state of pure bliss I realised the weekend was once again here and before long I found myself dressed as always in pure white entering the club with Master, waiting anxiously for his next method to break me completely Before we left this evening as I was kneeling waiting for Master to collect me he looked me deep in my eyes. "Well Jessica it's been a while since you have cum and tonight its the night that you get your chance." The thought filled me with excitement and anxiety. Master had said a chance and if I missed this chance then who knows when another would come my way. We were long past the point of Master giving me orgasms to heighten my sexuality and submission. Now that I was truly his orgasms would be given only on rare rare occasions. As always Master would made sure there was some lesson or humiliation involved in this. So being taken to the centre stage tonight I was the sole Slave bound in a way that both my pussy and mouth were free for use. I felt alone and scared, before at least there were others to share in my pain and humiliation but now it was just me facing it on my own. All alone on the stage I could feel all eyes on me as the announcement boomed over the speakers. "This sissy has been granted a rare opportunity to cum at her Masters request. Her challenge is to win the approval of at least 15 members of the club tonight and then she will be granted her reward. Any thing less than 15 and she will not get her reward" "Now Jessica each member has 20 minutes to do with you as they will will give you their own commands and I suggest you follow eagerly and enthusiastically. As you only have 6 hours to complete the task and since this is too much for your sissy brain that means 18 opportunities to impress." It was clear now I had to be perfect. Not only for my chance to cum but also as Master's representative of his training methods. I suspected some of the crueller masters and mistresses would abuse me and still not give me approval bit I would do my best no matter what. "Jessica declare yourself to the club and what you are." I knew this was my chance to get off to a good start and I knew what Master expected of me. "Masters and Mistresses, Please use, abuse and degrade this useless Sissy for your own pleasure. This sissy begs to be fucked and punished all for her Masters enjoyment, This Sissy will obey all order given. This Sissy is desperate to CUM!" I screamed out for all to hear. A large chorus of laughter and, "Hear hear!" appeared in the crowd as the first Master stepped forwards. I did not recognise him but it was a relatively easy start as he immediately he took a crop to my ass and commanded that I beg like a bitch in heat for his crop and cock inside him. Desperately I pleaded and begged and degraded myself in front of the whole crowd. Begging and panting and thanking him for every stroke. After 5 minutes he was satisfied I had begged enough and begun to fuck my ass in a fury. "You only get my approval if you make me cum before the time is up sissy," he growled in my ear. Instantly I took all of Masters training and using my now expert pussy muscles milked him for everything he was worth. Fortunately I made him cum by the 17th minute of his session and earned his approval. The Master patted me on the head and I had 3 minutes of relative rest before the next mistress came onto the stage. This mistress had never played with a sissy before so worked on my breasts and ovaries whilst holding a vibrator against my clitty. All I had to do was survive the 20 minutes of whipping that she was inflicting on me whilst she wrapped a loop of steel wire around the base of my breasts breasts squeezing them out considerably. She would leave this loop on for the remainder of my challenge. I am sure this mistress felt that she was inflicting a large amount of pain but compared to Master it was like a tickle although of course I wouldn't let her know this as I was desperate for her approval. The next Members continued in similar fashions as I lost count of how many I had serviced. Some where near the middle a young cocky Master came up and after having me degrade myself and add another band to my gorgeous boobs commanded that in the remaining 15 minutes I needed to bring him to orgasm with my mouth. He boasted of his ability and that I would fail at the task. Something about his cocky yet clearly uniformed attitude reminded me about my former self and I felt an instant dislike to him, although I would never show this as a lowly sissy everyone was above me. Unashamedly I took this as a challenge and used every trick master had taught me. Clearly this Master was very inexperienced and had never had a cocksucker like me. I started slowly teasing him in the most delicate of spots and before he could get used the sensations I took his admittedly large penis all down my throat using my tongue to play with the shaft. I must have looked like a gorgeous sight to behold as No sooner did I take him deep down my throat he lost control and came almost directly into my stomach. This of course drew some laughter from the crowd and some humiliation from the young Master. As he withdrew from the stage I realised that I was stupid as there was no way he would deem my performance acceptable having placed him in a position of ridicule. After loosing track of how many I had serviced a time came that I had been dreading since signing the slave contract. The next Master to come to the stage I recognised instantly. Jamie Matthews. I used to despise this man as a rival and enemy as we were always after the same contracts and promotions. Jamie approached me with the biggest smirk on his face and slapped my now sore ass very hard. Kneeling down in front of me he looked directly into my eyes and I had to avert my gaze. This was pure hell for me and revenge on the man that I had used to be. "Look into my eyes Sissy," he spat at me. With great trepidation and reluctance I slowly pulled my gaze to him. "To think that I used to have begrudging respect for you, and now to see what you have become. I'm ashamed to have ever considered a piece of filth like you my rival and it looks like you have found your true calling in life." Silence between us as I could feel my heart almost pounding out of its chest. What could I say or do? I was Master's slave and Master commanded me to serve. Clearly Master had known this was coming, was this his final act to break me or his final act of punishment for my disobedience weeks before? "Now tell me what you are." I could feel the pressure building up in me I had to hold strong but my emotions were starting to get the better of me. "Master I am a useless Sissy slave," I said with my voice croaking and breaking it's usual feminine clarity. "And what does a useless Sissy slave do?" Struggling to continue with my voice becoming more hysterical I responded "A useless Sissy slave follows her Masters or Mistresses orders. A useless Sissy slave is not fit for anything except to be a toy for those that are better than her" "Now beg for me to teach you your place sissy." "Master please teach me... m my place." Sob. "Sissy now remember your manners and thank me for each lesson." "Yes." Sob. "Master." Master Jamie then proceeded to spank my ass with a paddle. It wasn't the hardest spanking I had received and I knew that he was going softly as he wanted to break my spirit not my body. The fact that the man I had despised more than anything in the world was using me as a toy killed me inside. I knew I was Masters sissy his toy his play piece, but Master was magnificent this man was nothing but a cowardly weasel and I had to treat him with reverence. After 10 minutes of spanking and me sobbing gently thanking him after every stroke he approached me again. "Sissy do you know you place." "Yes." Sob. "Maste.r" "Good now take me as deep as possible." With more hesitation and trepidation from myself Master Jamie moved in front of me and being the obedient sissy I was I took his penis down my throat. It was made worse by the fact that he did have a beautiful penis although not as large as Masters. I had at least hoped he would have a tiny penis to his shame but it was not the case. After a few minutes of teasing from myself he was rock hard and approached me from behind. This was it the last stages of who I was was about to be obliterated. My worst enemy about to take me from behind but he of course made the situation even worse. "Beg for it Sissy." It was finally too much for me and I broke down in tears, only fearing disappointment and Masters anger I somehow managed between the tears to muster "Master." Sob. "Pl..eas..e fuck.. thi..s" Sob. "Sis..sssy." "With pleasure," came the reply. As I felt his large tool enter me from behind I was utterly humiliated. I couldn't even focus properly on massaging his penis with my pussy as I had been trained to do so. It didn't matter Master Jamie was so turned on from his power over me that I could feel him tense very quickly. He removed his penis form my pussy and moving to my front told me to beg for his cum. Still sniffling I somehow mustered a coherent enough reply that satisfied him and with my eyes shut felt layer after layer of his cum coat my face. "What a good look for you sissy," I heard him sneer as he walked away. I couldn't even focus properly for the next ten minutes and clearly failed in the next mistresses orders. I had to refocus myself as I couldn't afford to displease any more if was going to earn my reward. Thinking desperately about Master's reaction if I failed him I took all my remaining willpower and concentration to see off the remaining tasks. By this finish I was a complete wreck, my body feeling the punishment of the various games I had to play and my mind and soul almost completely shattered by the experience. I could barely make out the announcer as he had collected the votes and was detailing how each one of the members had voted. I had passed all until the young master that I had humiliated gave me a fail. This however displeased the crowd as I had completed his task as requested and it was only his bruised ego that gave me a fail. The announcer clearly overturned his decision and the young master stormed out of the club. I would run into that man further down the road but he would be completely different by then. Some of the club members did not like his cocky and childish attitude and felt he would be much better as a slave than a Master. They did eventually capture, transform and train him to be a feminized pony but that is the topic of a different story, Then surprisingly Master Jamie had passed me. Looking back on it I had passed his tests, he wanted to humiliate me and make sure I knew what a lowly sissy I was and I had passed his test. I failed the next mistress after Master Jamie since my head was not in the right place, but thankfully managed to pass all the remaining. All in all I only failed once! My heart was bouncing around, I could cum! Nothing else mattered to me not even my fierce rival's victory over me, but I had passed Masters test and could cum. "CONGRATULATIONS," boomed the speaker. "Sissy Jessica has passed the test." With that my Master appeared on stage. The crowd was silenced briefly as they were looking forward or expectant for Master to find some way to humiliate me or make me cum then. As he knelt down to look in my tear stained eyes with dried cum all over my face he whispered into my ear, "Good job Jessica, now let's get you home for your reward." With that Master motioned over slaves to untie me and to clean me up ready to go home. There was a groan from the crowd, obviously wanting to see how I would get my reward but this is one of the many many things I loved about Master. He knew when to show me off and humiliate me but also understood that some things were special just between us. Master had never made me cum in front of anyone else but him and he never would for the rest of our lives.