Taking The Piss free porn video

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Inspired by the annoying cackle of the TV presenter of the programme, TO BUY OR NOT TO BUY

“Shit! How did you get in?’ she gasped, her eyes glancing back to the door, which I was slamming behind her.

“Never you mind Rani, I hoped you would be along,” I told her, stepping close, knowing she wouldn’t see my ugly mug through the stocking mask over my head.

Instinctively she moved back, but I grabbed her thick winter coat and clasped my hand over her mouth. She struggled valiantly, but she was no match for my strength and bulk, she was about five foot two inches tall, as I manhandled her into the lounge of the very, large, but old cottage on the edge of Twyford in Berkshire, UK. I threw her onto the large old fashioned sofa with wooden arms and grabbed the torn off piece of duct tape, from the top of the roll I had already placed on the arm. It was over her mouth in a flash. I put her shoulder bag next to mine.

Her thick black hair was partly covering her flustered face, her eyes boggling as I approached, unzipping my slacks and dropping them on the floor right next to where she lay. I reached down and she flinched away as if I was going to hurt her, but I simply brushed away her lush locks and savoured the scared look on her pretty Asian face. I guessed she was either of Indian or Pakistani descent, I didn’t care, but the light, smokey hue of her skin was extremely attractive to me, as she would have remembered following the TV programme my then wife and I had been on with her some months before.

To Buy or Not to Buy is a popular house purchase series on BBC and we had done the usual, getting a free day out at their expense, nosing around a few people’s homes and not buying. However it did provide me with useful insights into what there was available to steal, once I had unpicked the security systems, if any; surprising how many don’t install them.

Rani Price and the obligatory male presenter, can’t remember his name showed us round four properties and we’d Oooed and Ahhed over them all, but of course not buying. However this Liverpudlian cow, had flirted heavily with me, when I got split from my viewing partner, but not letting me get anywhere with her.

In one of the bedrooms, she had hinted how well made and sturdy the bed was, it being included in the sale. In a wet room, how nice it would be double up under the rainfall shower, how cozy it would be to snuggle up on a huge sofa in front of an open fire. All comments made with what I took to be a definite twinkle, wink and come on from the married, forty two year old bitch. I was available then and very much so now, since the cow I married has buggered off with one of my drinking buddies, the situation was just coming to a head when we were televised but we still carried on with it.

Dressed in a light weight, pale blue cardigan over a form fitting, white tee-shirt over a black knee length skirt and no stockings or tights, her painted toes peeping from two inch high wedge raffia sandals, she had looked extremely tasty in the summer light. She was what I would call pear shaped, with small tits and a wide arse and hips, but her legs were shapely and toned. Her gorgeous perfume which was Gucci Guilty (I asked her) had me in her spell, her hair curled and flowed round her cute, big smiling face, with its just nicely prominent nose. Her teeth were an incredible array of whiteness.

The gentle contrast between the overall tone of her skin and the slightly lighter shades of the palms of her delicate, well manicured hands with pale paint on her nails was an extra draw as I lust after coloured girls of every hue. As we aimed to meet the others and were off camera, I whispered to her how much I had enjoyed her personal tour with my arm round her waist until I briefly dropped it over her wide butt. She gave me a blistering look and hissed.

“Don’t fucking touch the goods mister. It’s not me you’re buying.”

From then on whether we were on or off camera she took the piss out of me relentlessly, about my size, my taste, my car, my clothes and I didn’t like it. I’m not used to girls treating me like that. Yes OK - take the piss in good nature and with humour, but hers was biting and aimed like barbed spears.

Weeks later, the wife fucked off and I saw Rani on screen a few times and she annoyed me with her non stop cackling laugh, which I must admit I hadn’t noticed on the programme, probably because I was too busy concentrating on getting into her knickers and not the house we weren’t going to buy. By sheer chance I happened on a conversation in a pub one lunchtime, where a group of people were saying their house was to be featured on the programme. I delayed my journey in the locality and when they left I followed them home. It was a superb, large and expensive looking property, right out in the sticks. I made some telephone enquiries locally and found names, based on I was from the Beeb and had got lost and hadn’t been issued with a file of directions. That evening it was easy to make up an ID card that matched the one I had seen many times round Rani’s neck on the initial interviews and pre-camera part of ‘our’ show. One of my business sidelines besides stealing stuff, was forging documents and ID cards was a gift. I found the house again and bullshitted my way in with the woman who owned it, recognizing her from the pub.

I claimed I was from the BBC and needed to do some notes and measurements for camera angles and such. She was mid sixties, plain, dumpy and dowdy and of no interest, although stripped off I would have no doubt found a cunt and arse to fuck, while playing with pendulous blue veined breasts and she was busy, grooming a horse out back so she left me to it. As usual a set of keys was hanging in the kitchen door and I pressed the right one into a pad I carry for such purposes. I checked the alarm system control and deduced it was very basic, no line to the cops or anything and then I found a key in a utility room which was not alarmed. That key was also copied. There wasn’t much in the way of valuables as far as I could judge and I’ve nicked a few in my time. Even the TV sets were old and not plasma. There was quite a stack of turntable, amplifiers etc in one room where a huge collection of vinyl records was racked, but apart from that, nothing really. I found out, the occupants were moving soon and a lot of stuff had gone elsewhere.

Upstairs, again no great pictures, sculptures and odd little collections of porcelain you often see on landings. I thought about checking the underwear as I often do, being an inveterate panty sniffer, but she didn’t grab me as sexy or remotely interesting, sex wise, I know you can be wrong judging a book by its cover, but not this time I surmised. The other three bedrooms seemed to be stale and unoccupied, so no young daughter’s panties around either.

“All done,” I called out from the kitchen.

“Ah OK, ‘ she replied, waving and coming to the house. “Sorry, I should have offered you a cup of tea or something.”

“No problem and you’re busy. We scheduled for the... ?” I fussily queried my notes in a clipboard, fishing for an answer.

“Fifteenth,”she bit the bait. “We are moving out to Spain on the twelfth anyway and your people know that and have a set of keys.”

“Fine, perfect, they are usually organized like that. Not sure if I’ll be in the crew on the filming days,” I bluffed, said goodbye and left.

On leaving, I checked out the lane it was on, the untidy entrance to an adjacent copse which could be easily reached across the garden. It was easy after that. Keys made and the plan.

Having talked to Rani during our filming, always curious about how are things made and done, she told me she always gets into the houses the day before with the vendor’s agreement to wander round and thoroughly immerse herself in the place. This was done alone without hindrance or being sidelined by her co-presenter. All I had had to do was enter early and wait, as I didn’t know the order she would allocate the houses.

So now I stood over her in the unoccupied and to me, now familiar residence, wanking my seven inch, teasing pre-lube from my knob slit and letting it drip wherever. The mini camera I had clipped to my shirt would capture every nuance of our encounter, from when she entered. I intended to unclip it later to capture some essential detail. She was trying to mumble something as I stooped and pulled her wrap-around coat loose and roamed my eyes over her black mini skirt which was over opaque black tights. She wore a black jumper with a thick roll neck and looked very cozy, warm and terrified. I unzipped her knee high brown boots and teased them off.

Easing her upwards, her coat was dragged off, she was not wriggling much, but to save any fighting while I enjoyed myself, I taped her wrists up above her head to the arm of the sofa. Rolling the chunky jumper upwards revealed a lovely expanse of heaving light brown belly and a very ornate white lace bra with delicate pink and red patterns inset, amongst some sheer sections. Her small tits were still completely encased in it, even though her arms were stretched above her head. The flood of warmth from her body was powerful as I bent to slip my hands under Rani and unclip her bra. I checked its size, 34B and then checked her tits.

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“Well, hell,” Thea said as she wiped the beads of perspiration from her face. “I guess ‘spring’ is here, huh?” “Yeah. It’s supposed to be cooler at higher elevation,” I replied. We took a few minutes in the shade by the rocks before rejoining our boyfriends. The four of us had driven up into the pass to hike. According to the weather report, the last coolness of a fading winter was supposed to continue through mid-week, but they were wrong. Actually, from our view from Eagle Point, where we’d...

1 year ago
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Motherless

Motherless.com! What an original name for a porn site, don't you think? The title doesn't fuck around: your mother would never allow you to watch the kind of filth they’ve got on tap. They pride themselves on being a moral-free zone for sick fucks, where you can find damn near anything. I’m talking about desperate chicks fucking anything that resembles a dick and crazy bitches literally eating shit. When you’re done fapping to the weird vids, you can even find "normal" porno to pass the time....

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1 year ago
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Motherless Interracial

Ah, motherless, here we are again. A site known for offering such a variety, that no matter how fucked up your needs are, there is a high chance that you will fulfill them here. However, I am not here to blab about the site in general; I am here to talk about one particular category, interracial. As for those who want to know more about the site, there is a whole different review on my website instead.As for those who came here to learn more about that interracial lovemaking, I got your back....

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3 years ago
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Pauline The Slut Part 32 Therese Humiliates Pau

Therese looked at the scene before her. Her father and brother naked, her grandfather’s cock sticking out of his trousers and her grandmother eating her mother’s cunt, both of us naked. Beth with the camera, filming. “God, the slut is only in the door and she’s gone sex mad.” she said referring to me. She went and sat on the arm of her father’s chair putting her arm around him and kissing him on the cheek. My father was now hard again. He pushed my mother out of the way and started to fuck me...

3 years ago
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The BarlowsThea

Three months later, the sound of laughter made Thea Barton look up. The now twenty year -old blond-headed beauty was in the living room reading when she heard it. Recognizing the voice of Uncle Dan, she smiled as she waited to see whom he was going to be with. When the laughter grew louder, she smiled. Ah, yes! It was Irene, her now very good friend! Uncle Dan seemed to prefer her to the others. Her being married seemed to make no difference to all concerned parties. Thea smiled to herself,...

2 years ago
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The United Kingdom of Zoo A fake BBC documentary seriesS10E17 Ashley Mathews 29 from Newcastle Northern Ireland

This week’s show begins with that same old rusty bedstead, and that same old dirty mattress. Pausing to take in the magnificent filthiness of it, then pulling back to reveal the bare concrete floor around it, and to take in the harsh lighting. And then we hear our guest of the week approaching, quick little footsteps ... Light clicks on the studio floor. We pan round to see what we’ve got this week and see a slight, pale, small-boobed lady walking in quick, short strides ... She’s not is a...

2 years ago
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Love Lust For My Aunt Bethesda Part 8211 1

Hi, guys. It’s been a long time on ISS. I was away from the city. I hope you did like my other two stories(true incidents) which I had written. This is the next encounter I had with my aunt who was all alone and needed a little love for her. Her name is Bethesda and lived her whole life alone after her husband married another woman. I do have a lust for her and want her so badly. She is 45 years old and looks bomb. She got a good voluptuous body and looks like a brunette. As for me, I’m six...

Incest
3 years ago
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Becoming Anthea Part 2

My name is Anthony; I am twenty-two years old and live with my beautiful girlfriend Zoe. As you have read I have dark hair and dark eyes and I am clean shaven. Zoe is older than I am by a couple of years and is the driving force of our relationship. I am what many call a cross-dresser: a guy that gets great sexual satisfaction from dressing in women’s clothing.Of course, my girlfriend knows all about my cross-dressing. In fact, she encourages me to cross-dress. Once a week, generally on a...

Toys
1 year ago
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Theos LIfe as a Weresquirrel

Theo had been changing into the squirrel too much, he knew that now... as a pulse of heat raced through his body from his groin. He realized that he shouldn't have come to the office.He had been spending most of his days at the squirrel in his home deep in the countryside. Teleworking most of the time, as the squirrel he felt no need for clothes, his heavy furred balls resting between his thighs as his paws raced over the keyboard. The sharp claws on his paws clattering loudly as he typed,...

Fantasy & Sci-Fi
1 year ago
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Motherless Scat

It’s time to go to the land of chocolate fountains and golden showers. That’s right. Scat, piss, shit, and every fluid in between. Ever fuck a chick in her ass and freak out when you see that little bit of shit on your dick? Then I’m sorry to say that scat isn’t for you buddy. Were you the only one of your friends that saw two girls one cup and didn’t get grossed out? If so, it’s time to celebrate it! Don’t get pissed off, get pissed on! Scat porn has the craziest, kinkiest chicks and dudes...

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1 year ago
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Motherless Fappening

I’m not saying anything controversial when I say men love seeing women naked. It’s a fact of life as fundamental as gravity. It’s a force of nature that cannot be stopped by beast, man, or God. It’s an eternal truth and a divine mandate. As sure as the sun will rise, men will attempt to view as many women naked as they possibly can. Any man not doing so is either a sad or a gay one.This means that any woman a man sees regularly is mentally stripped down during every interaction. If any women...

The Fappening
3 years ago
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A Day in the Life of Dr Smithers

Clayton Smithers was really glad he had listened to his mother when she told him he should become a doctor. Mom had always told him it would be a lot of work but worth it in money and prestige. She had been only part right. Hardly any work had been required, just learning the jargon and technical terms by studying books and papers written by psychiatrists who had taken the hard route to obtaining their degrees. Clayton Smithers had taken the easy route, buying his degree from the best diploma...

4 years ago
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Drink Daddys Piss

As the light began to filter in through the blinds, Daddy's Princess began to stir. She was sleeping as she always slept, with her cheek on Daddy's chest, her leg d****d over his and her shaven cunt pressed warmly against his thigh. His arm was wrapped around her, holding her firmly and protectively to him. As was normally the case, she could feel his morning erection pressing against her and the warmth and the strength of his hard cock never failed to get her little cunt starting to flow,...

3 years ago
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Absinthe Dreams

‘To me it’s not really a green. When I think green, I think of grass. That’s more like lemonade color.’ Erica’s nose was far too close to the glasses for my taste. Pouring the nearly clear absinthe over the rough-cut, cane-sugar cubes I favor, I tapped my spoon for a second to get her to back up. I wished I had my full setup here like I have at home, my Absinthe fountains water drippers are missed when I began to try and slowly pour water over the sugar cube. ‘Don’t you light it on fire?’ she...

1 year ago
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Motherless Arab

Have you ever heard about a wonderful site called “Motherless”? I have a feeling that was a dumb question, of course, you fucking have. Well, I am here to talk about Motherless, but I shall also pay special attention to their Arab category. If you think Arabian sluts are hot, well you are in for a tasty treat, believe me.First, I should probably warn you that the name of this place comes from the fact that their content might be a bit too hardcore or questionable for some of you. Back in the...

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1 year ago
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Motherless Facials

Fuck yeah, life’s a bitch! So here I am, awake at 3:45 AM, after dreaming I was fucking this freaking hot MILF neighbor with heavy boobs, a flat tummy, a nice bubble butt, and sexy long legs. It was all hot and steamy, up until when she was sucking me off and just as I was about to obliterate her cute face with hot cum canon, my dream cut right off and I woke up with a tent on my pajamas.That dream ain’t coming back, but damn it! I sure gotta cum, so I boot up my laptop and type “cum facial” in...

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4 years ago
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Watching Thea

Her head had been on the brink of falling onto my shoulder for the past 15 minutes. Every time, I thought I’d feel her soft locks brush against my skin, the train would rattle and she roused herself up again. It was torture. I could clearly see she could barely muster the energy to sit up straight again, and I could no longer bear the torture of anticipating the sensations to come and still not feel her on my shoulder. I couldn’t help but let out an exasperated sigh when the train suddenly...

2 years ago
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Enjoying Gunthers attention

I had met Gunther while attending a boring conference out of town.Of course my beloved hubby had not been there for sure.He was a young athletic Austrian guy, handsome and muscled. A real gentleman, but I felt he had a dark past and I wanted to know it…Now Gunther was in town and my hubby was out; so I agreed to meet him at a local pub, I knew it was not the sort of place I would normally go with a man on my first date; but I did not care about it…I decided to wear my tightest black leather...

3 years ago
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Absinthe 2 The Absinthe of Malice

Absinthe 2: The Absinthe of Malice By Morpheus The flight from Seattle to Boston had been extremely long and uncomfortable, even with the two hour delay in Chicago where I got to stretch my legs and change flights. My book had given me something to do during the countless hours in the air, though admittedly, Collin had been my largest savior from boredom. The two of us had ended up talking for over half the flight, and by the time we finally landed, I was even starting to consider...

4 years ago
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Thea

Und draußen schallte wieder Punkmusik aus dem Ghettoblaster – von der Eisenbahnunterführung bis zu seinem Haus! Punks und Skater hingen da ab. Das war diese Art von Jugendlichen, die ihren Eltern das Leben schwer macht , die von Arbeit nichts hielten, sich an keine Regeln hielten, ständig auf Party machten. Die soffen viel zu viel und kotzten dann in irgendeine Ecke. Denen bedeutete doch nichts und niemand etwas. Wahrscheinlich nahmen sie auch Drogen und trieben weiß-Gott-was mit...

BDSM
1 year ago
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Mrs Ethel HarrisChapter 4

Anna introduced Ethel to her father, Jonas Strong, when they met him in Wilsonville. Jonas was owner and manager of the bank and was a pillar of the community. He was surprised to see a woman dressed as Ethel was, but was completely taken by her when he found out that she had saved his daughter's life. He was impressed by any woman who had the gumption to be a gunfighter, and he was further impressed by the way she was armed. Jonas wanted to get to know Ethel better, so he and Anna stayed...

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