A Satyre On The Andy Griffeth Show free porn video

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A satyre on Mayberry, or the episode you won't see on t.v.

Hi I'm Opie, you've seen me and Pa and Barneya million times on t.v. but what you did not know it that I am now twenty two years old and Aunt Bea is looking pretty freaking hot.

Well, it had been a long hot summer down here and things were pretty shipshape law wise, no big crime wave and Pa figured it was time to go camping and fishing for a few days, bring his guitar an scare the crap out of any wilderness animals.

Aunt Bea had a trip planned for the same time and had her bags packed. I could hardly wait as I wanted to take care of some things as I wore Aunt Bea's clothes. Particularly her blue satin like dress with white lace, her patent black heels and beads, the half-glasses that never left her bedroom, yeah those were nice.

So Big bad Barney's gonna run the show huh? well there's not much of any real trouble down here. Barney's a good guy though, been dropping in for coffee at breakfast for as long as I can remember and Thelma Lou? wheee-ew, nice bit of ass there and Miss Crump has a set of knockers a guy could have a good time with.

Pa had just left as did Aunt Bea but I waited half to three quarters of an hour in case someone forgot something, turns out it was me who forgot that old Barney had keys to the house. I could not believe it. There I was laid out on the sofa in heels a nice dress a string of pearls, ear rings and watching T.V.land when I see Barney pull up into our driveway in the Police cruiser. He could fuck up a wet dream. I was out of aunties clothes in a hurry, went up to my room and changed into regular clothes.

Barney was in the house already, in the living room actually, looking at Aunt Bea's clothes and fingering her double string of pearls and he had a weird look on his face and though at the moment I did not know what to think of this, I damn well did later that day.

"Well Opie, we have a big problem here. I have to take all Aunt Bea's clothes to the sheriff's office as evidence."

Barney was always trying to impress everyone with his real lack of police expertise and all I could see was a lack of a good time good time in my hot aunties clothes.

"I don't think so Barney, she left'em here, thought they were too dressy for her visit."

"No Opie, Lefty skinny fingers must have been here, figures the pearls are worth around a quarter of a mill. Probably saw me pull into the driveway and split."

"Barney, are you outa your fuckin' mind? where in hell's Aunt Bea gonna come up with that kinda dough?"

"Sorry Opie but don't you dare interfere with police work or I'll have to write you up for it."

Five in the afternoon and Mayberry's as quiet as a church. I was pissed to the fourth power of ten.I was so looking forward to some cross dressing and thanks to Barney, well from that time on I no longer liked him and I swore to get even.

I was so angry I almost forgot the weird look Barney had as he fingered my aunts double string of pearls, Then I knew something was very much mixed up. A guy does not make notes of how a guy looks at something but he knows a weird look, and that weird look along with a cop fingering a double string of pearls really told me something. I somehow knew beyond a doubt that something quite strange was going on over at the courthouse. I did not see Barney walking his beat as I neared the courthouse. The cruiser was in front but the doors to the courthouse were locked.

So I went behind the courthouse and got up on some fifty five gallon drums of kerosene for the heating system and took a look through the window of the jail cells and was not all that surprised to see Barney decked out like my Aunt Bea. Lefty Skinnyfingers huh? YUP Barney knew all along what he wanted to do and though he had no idea what I was up to, he knew what he wanted to do and had no trouble making up a story to suit his needs.

I rapped on the window and out of sheer reflexes Barney turned around and saw me looking at him and I was pleased to see him go ghastly white in seconds, then a few shades of purple.

yeah man I was fucking mad, I always thought Barney was a straight shooter but this was too much, that he lied to me so he could dress up in my aunts clothes, an I dea came to my mind.

"Hey Floyd, come an get a load outa this."

I am sure Barney had to shit right through aunties panties when he heard me holler that, and I could do a pretty good job of sounding like him or other people like Bogart, Sam Spade.

He got himself into cops clothes again and I met him at the courthouse door, where he just about yanked me in with the door hardly open.

"Well Barn, looks like Floyd's really gonna have something to talk about in his shop."

"Opie, how could you?"

Barney was white with fright, how would he ever live this down in the little town he so loved.

"How could you lie to me about so called Lefty Skinnyfingers? You knew what you were gonna do all the time!"

"Opie, a cops life is full of stress, you must know that."

"I do Barney, a cop in L.A. or Boston or new York City, not here Barney!"

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It was seven-thirty in the morning four days later when Kathy came out to the kitchen. To her surprise she found Andy with her head on her arms trying to muffle the sound of her crying. Unlike the time at dinner, this was no act. Dropping to her knees beside Andy's chair, Kathy took the woman in her arms. As soon as she did, Andy wrapped her arms around Kathy's neck and started to bawl. "Kathy," she wailed, "I'm so sorry!" "Sorry? Sorry about what?" Kathy whispered, genuinely...

Andy TaylorChapter 9

The four women got into the Rolls with Kelly and Andy riding in rear-facing seats. Nita just wriggled on the leather upholstery and murmured, "Yum! How wonderfully elegant!" While they drove home, Andy explained that Nita was going to provide coaching in fashion and style. Kelly greeted the news with a small cheer and a wide grin. Arriving at the apartment building, Nita's eyes were wide as they rode up in the private elevator and entered the apartment. Looking around, she thought it was...

Andy TaylorChapter 13

Recovering from her reverie, Andy focused on the painting Barbara had taken from her artist's case. It was a nude painting of herself seated in a chair with Jack standing behind her and Kelly standing next to him. He had one hand on Andy's shoulder and the other resting on the glorious curve of Kelly's hip. Andy's hand was touching his. She just shook her head and said, "Bobbie, that is utterly incredible! You have Jack and Kelly exactly right, but what did you do to me? I can't...

Andy Part 1

The work Christmas party: a time where everyone gets insanely drunk just for the hell of it. And also the time to see your boss doing his own interpretation of "dance" in the middle of the floor. Hilarious doesn't quite cover it.Seeing as I'm 18, I'm one of the oldest of my friends. Which makes me the official drink buyer. You'd think I'd hate having to go up to the bar to order a constant stream of baby drinks like WKD... but not when your friend pushes a £10 note into your hand and demands...

Andy the Straight Guy

I was kind of surprised when Andy asked me to stay the night at his house. He just up and called out of the blue and asked "You wanna come over?" I said "Sure". Now, pulling up in the driveway, the butterflies started up in my stomach. For the longest time now, I've had a crush on Andy. But, I stayed my distance, knowing he was straight. I'm not gay myself, just bisexual. My crush for him, though, was still very powerful. Andy stood six-foot-one and was around one hundred and ninety ponds. He...

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