Guilt
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He stopped her in the hall on the way to Jason’s room and Cali could tell by the look on his face that he wasn’t happy with her. She had seen him coming, and even though every part of her screamed run, she knew better than to try. He grabbed her shoulder, his large hand engulfing her flesh, his fingers digging into her skin as he pushed her up against the wall and leaned in close. She had to fight with her body to keep from going into panic mode, struggling to stay relaxed as the adrenaline surged through her.
“Who is he?” Caleb demanded in a harsh whisper, his face so close to hers that she could feel his breath on her lips. She took a deep breath and avoided looking into his eyes, about to play innocent even though she knew exactly who he was talking about:
“Who...“ But he interrupted her with another push against the wall.
“Don’t play games Cali, you know who I mean.” The expression he wore was so like her father’s in that moment that it send a shudder through her, chilling her to the core. She knew that Caleb was no stranger to violence, and that, just like dad, he had a bad temper and no qualms over hitting a woman.
“Jason. He’s an empath,” she said, then quickly added: “but he doesn’t know about you Caleb, I promise.” in hopes of soothing his rage before things turned nasty. His eyes narrowed suspiciously at her and she could tell that he didn’t know whether to believe her or not. “He doesn’t know.” she whispered again, her voice pleading. Something in her face must have convinced him she was telling him the truth because he pulled away slowly, taking a step back, and was visibly more relaxed
“Good.” Cali watched his gaze travel up and down her body appraisingly, as if he had just noticed what she was wearing. She had just left the pool and had yet to change out of her bikini, a decision she was now regretting, with only a towel wrapped around her waist. She flinched when he reached out and placed his hand along the side of her right breast, his fingers finding the massive scar along her side and tracing it down to her hip bone, causing an uncomfortable flush of heat to her face and groin.
He licked his lips, she knew what was he was going to say before the words had even left his lips, but still they caused her stomach to drop. “Come to my room at twelve tonight, don’t be late.” He left without waiting for a response, not that he needed one, and for a moment she stood against the wall and closed her eyes, keeping the tears at bay. There was no way she would let Jason know that something was wrong.
It was ten to twelve and Cali found herself at Caleb’s door already, trying not to think about what was to come. She stood there for a moment, not ready to go in, but not wanting to be seen there if somebody happened to pass by. Taking a deep breath she knocked once before entering, then shut the door quickly behind her. Caleb stood as she came in, shirtless and clearly impatient, hitting pause on the movie he’d been watching before approaching her. He wasted no time as he pulled her close and claimed her mouth with his, his hands eagerly yanking the shorts she was wearing down her hips until they dropped to the floor. Under which, she wore nothing. Her tank top he dealt with in a similar fashion, breaking their kiss only to pull it over her head and then resuming with the same intensity until her mouth was red from the force of his passion.
He encircled her waist with one arm, she felt him reach behind her with the other and heard the tell-tale click of the door being locked, and for some reason it caused her chest to tighten and tears to spring in her eyes. As if a locked door was the only thing preventing her escape. That taken care of, his free hand moved to her exposed breast, roughly grabbing and squeezing as he pushed his tongue between her lips and explored her mouth. A calloused finger brushed over her nipple, sending a shock of pleasure throughout and pulling a gasp from her. Cali could feel his smirk against her lips, heard the low chuckle in his throat and hardened her will against him. He repeated the motion, encircling the sensitive tip and flicking it gently, trying to elicit another response from his unwilling partner, but she refused to give him the satisfaction.
It wasn’t long before he’d backed her into his bed and had her laying on it, legs dangling off the side as he leaned over her. She had expected to him to go for it then, as he normally would, and was caught off guard when he instead brought his mouth to her chest and pressed a knee between her legs, spreading her so that her sex was tight against his pant leg. She almost made a noise when he ground it in, biting her tongue to stop the cry short. It hurt, but she could tell by the way his eyes flicked upward to watch her reaction that he wanted to see it on her face. Since she didn’t give it to him the first time he bit her, just hard enough, and she relented to him with a soft whimper.
He pulled his mouth from her breast and loomed above her with an expression on his face that she had a hard time labeling. She avoided looking directly into his eyes as he occasionally enjoyed using his ability to terrify her, then hold her down and take her as she thrashed in a blind panic. She found herself staring at his muscular chest instead and realized how easy it had become for her to forget just how attractive the bastard was and how drawn to him she had been so many years ago when they were both still in high school. Cali hadn’t been the only girl with a crush on Caleb O ‘Daugherty, and she was certain that she wasn’t the only one to discover the hard way just what kind of man he was.
That first time had been a rude awakening. When she ran into Caleb months after running away from home, she had thought she was lucky. He offered to let her stay at his place, ever so charming and nice, but that was just his power talking. The truth was that Caleb had been an unseen witness to her crime and when he spotted her in the crowd that fateful summer he saw his opportunity and he seized it.
She still couldn’t block out the day he told her that he had not only watched her murder her father, he had filmed it as well, and that if she didn’t do what he told her to, he would turn her in. She just stood there in tears, shocked, terrified, as he started pulling off her clothes and his. By the time she had found her voice it was too late, he'd taken her virginity, and he hadn't been gentle about it either. The worst part of it all was that he hadn’t needed to; she would have given herself to him willing, blinded as she was by the lie he sold her with a charming smile, and he knew it.
“I saw the way you looked at him today,” he said suddenly, snapping her back into the present. Her eyes flicked up to his lips, watching them move when he spoke. “Your friend, Jason.” Cali’s face flushed when Caleb said his name and she automatically began shaking her head to deny it but he cut her off with a loud scoff. “Yeah, I thought so. Don’t lie to me.”
"Caleb..." she pleaded,
"Sshhhh." She bit her tongue, afraid to make him mad. "Now I don’t really give a fuck if you have the hots for that goddamn pussy," He said with a growing smirk, "But the thing is, I don’t want you thinking about him while I’m fucking you." Her face growing hotter and hotter as he spoke and her insides were tying themselves into knots. "Don’t worry though, I’m going to help you forget about him."
When he reached down between her legs she cringed, fearing the worst, but he was gentle as he parted her folds with his fingers and slid them slowly inside her. She let herself relax, knowing then that he wasn’t planning on hurting her; this was going to be an entirely different game. His thumb moved upwards and targeted the small bundle of nerves that made up her clit, expertly teasing it while pulsating his fingers against the sensitive pad of tissue just inside of her entrance. She felt a rush of pleasure, the desire coupled with shame that he could so easily manipulate her body, already growing slick with desire as he pumped his digits in and out, in and out, in and out, until her breath quickened and came in soft pants.
The harder she tried not to respond, the more her body seemed to succumb to his cruel ministrations. Within minutes, she was lost in the sensations his touch brought, her ass pressing into the bed, chest arching into the air, hands gripping the sheets so tightly that her knuckles lost their color. Through all this he continued, greedily drinking in the sight of her as he stroked and caressed, his eyes brimming with sadistic lust. As she neared her breaking she began to cry out, quietly at first, shutting her eyes tightly.
"Look at me." She heard him growl through the fog of pleasure. He quickened his pace, knowing that she was on the edge, wanting to drive her deeper into it. "LOOK AT ME." Her eyes snapped open to see him right before her, their eyes locked and she came. He covered her mouth with his free hand as she all but screamed when the first wave of her climax hit her.
Her muffled cries of ecstasy continued on as she rode it out, heat flooding between her legs, her sex pulsing around his fingers. When it was finally over she was trembling and covered with sweat, guilt making her feel sick as she looked at Caleb, now standing between her legs and undoing his belt with measured calm. He freed his erect member from the confines of his jeans and grabbed a hold of her hips, jerking her to the edge of the bed and with a single thrust he sank his entire length inside of her, letting out a low groan as her muscles clenched him tightly.
He pulled back until only the tip of him was in her before slamming himself back in, this time pulling a gasp from her as well. He did it again and again, grinding himself into her at the end of each thrust, sending shudders up her spine. She felt his hands move under her rear, gripping her, his fingers digging into her flesh as he quickened his pace.
It was surprising how quickly she adjusted to his abuse, and in the aftermath of the orgasm he'd brought on her body was all too accommodating. He leaned in, pressing his chest to hers so that they were intimately closer than she was used to, and tangled his fingers in her hair. His lips found hers, then moved down to her neck where he lightly bit and sucked until he had coaxed a moan from her lips. This, coupled with his rhythmic thrusting, made her flush and squirm beneath him, a warmth pooling in her lower belly as the pleasure began to build again. His smile when he looked down at her, a knowing smirk that made her hate herself for what was happening, made her think that she would rather it hurt again, if only to spare her this shame.
He took his time and Cali wasn’t sure if it was just what he was in the mood for or if this was just another game he was winning because she started getting light headed and found her hips lifting to meet his, allowing him to push deeper into her. She was having a hard time focusing, her body begging her to let go, to stop fighting it and give in to the urges she was feeling. She asked herself if it really mattered at this point that she was struggling not to enjoy what he was doing to her. The damage was already done. They both knew he’d won.
He caught her eyes again and held them while he worked himself in and out of her sex. There was something in his gaze that seemed almost- possessive. It surprised her at first, but then she remembered the way he looked at Jason when no one was looking, shortly after hearing about the holiday party fiasco. Maybe the reason Caleb cornered her in the hallway wasn’t because he’d been afraid she had revealed him, maybe it was something much more discomforting; he was jealous of her affection for Jason. She gasped suddenly when Caleb slid an arm under her lower back, lifting her hips so that they were angled upwards. He pressed harder into her, purposely sliding the two of them further onto the bed while he buried his face in the curve of her neck, knowing that was where she was most sensitive.
“It feels good doesn’t it?” He whispered. The sensation of his breath in her ear made her tighten and sent goose-bumps along her flesh.
“No…” Cali panted, shaking her head side to side, but even she didn’t believe it. So she kept repeating it, as if saying the word would somehow make it true. “No, no, no, no, no…” Caleb laughed, sending another shudder though her, then continued teasing her neck with his lips, just barely touching the skin. When he finally started sucking on it, she moaned, seemingly unable stop herself.
“No, no, no…” Her protests grew louder but they quickly turned to wordless cries as she writhed blindly under him, once again about to come. She was raking her nails against the flesh of his back with her legs wound tightly around his waist, throwing back her head and then letting out a strangled cry when he slammed into her, holding himself deep within her recesses as his length pulsated and filled her with liquid heat. She clung and gasped and moaned as her body in turn milked him and, when she opened her eyes still in the throes of a climax, he was staring down at her again.
“This is a first.” His words brought her down from her high quickly as she realized what he meant by them; he hadn’t expected her to come again. While the first time had been intentional, a humiliating game he'd played with her often in the past, he'd never been able to bring her while he was inside of her and this time hadn't even been trying.
It killed her that it had happened, and though he had induced her passion earlier Cali was still shocked and ashamed that she'd reached a climax with him. Caleb untangled his limbs from hers and pulled out of her, leaving an aching feeling in his wake. She sat up and drew her legs close to her body, watching as he zipped up his fly and redid his belt, feeling nothing but disgust now that it was all over.
“I’m glad to see you’re finally coming around.”
When she didn’t give him a response he picked her clothes from off the floor and tossed them to her, then walked into his bathroom and shut the door. Cali just sat there, emotionally numb and exhausted, while she listened to the shower running. Time passed, the shower turned off and Caleb reappeared, still wet, with a towel wrapped around his waist. He saw her and cocked an eyebrow. “Are you waiting for an encore? Christ, get the fuck out, I have shit to do.”
She slid off of the bed and pulled on her clothes, hating the sticky dampness that covered her thighs. He opened the door for her and watched her walk out, then slammed it shut behind her. She walked down the hallway in a daze, oblivious to her completely disheveled appearance, pausing only before the door to Mile’s room.
Part of her wanted to go in, bury her face in his chest and cry until it felt better, but how could she do that after just having orgasmed in Caleb’s bed, only a room away from his? How could she even face him? She deserved to be alone after what she had just let happen, Cali decided as she tore her gaze from dorm room three-fourteen and forced herself to keep walking, if Jason ever found out he’d probably want nothing more to do with her.
She spent the rest of the night trying to scrub the sweat and filth from her skin, but no matter how many times she washed and rinsed and scrubbed her skin red, she still felt dirty. After a few hours she finally gave up and climbed into bed wet, sore, and ashamed.
“Who is he?” Caleb demanded in a harsh whisper, his face so close to hers that she could feel his breath on her lips. She took a deep breath and avoided looking into his eyes, about to play innocent even though she knew exactly who he was talking about:
“Who...“ But he interrupted her with another push against the wall.
“Don’t play games Cali, you know who I mean.” The expression he wore was so like her father’s in that moment that it send a shudder through her, chilling her to the core. She knew that Caleb was no stranger to violence, and that, just like dad, he had a bad temper and no qualms over hitting a woman.
“Jason. He’s an empath,” she said, then quickly added: “but he doesn’t know about you Caleb, I promise.” in hopes of soothing his rage before things turned nasty. His eyes narrowed suspiciously at her and she could tell that he didn’t know whether to believe her or not. “He doesn’t know.” she whispered again, her voice pleading. Something in her face must have convinced him she was telling him the truth because he pulled away slowly, taking a step back, and was visibly more relaxed
“Good.” Cali watched his gaze travel up and down her body appraisingly, as if he had just noticed what she was wearing. She had just left the pool and had yet to change out of her bikini, a decision she was now regretting, with only a towel wrapped around her waist. She flinched when he reached out and placed his hand along the side of her right breast, his fingers finding the massive scar along her side and tracing it down to her hip bone, causing an uncomfortable flush of heat to her face and groin.
He licked his lips, she knew what was he was going to say before the words had even left his lips, but still they caused her stomach to drop. “Come to my room at twelve tonight, don’t be late.” He left without waiting for a response, not that he needed one, and for a moment she stood against the wall and closed her eyes, keeping the tears at bay. There was no way she would let Jason know that something was wrong.
It was ten to twelve and Cali found herself at Caleb’s door already, trying not to think about what was to come. She stood there for a moment, not ready to go in, but not wanting to be seen there if somebody happened to pass by. Taking a deep breath she knocked once before entering, then shut the door quickly behind her. Caleb stood as she came in, shirtless and clearly impatient, hitting pause on the movie he’d been watching before approaching her. He wasted no time as he pulled her close and claimed her mouth with his, his hands eagerly yanking the shorts she was wearing down her hips until they dropped to the floor. Under which, she wore nothing. Her tank top he dealt with in a similar fashion, breaking their kiss only to pull it over her head and then resuming with the same intensity until her mouth was red from the force of his passion.
He encircled her waist with one arm, she felt him reach behind her with the other and heard the tell-tale click of the door being locked, and for some reason it caused her chest to tighten and tears to spring in her eyes. As if a locked door was the only thing preventing her escape. That taken care of, his free hand moved to her exposed breast, roughly grabbing and squeezing as he pushed his tongue between her lips and explored her mouth. A calloused finger brushed over her nipple, sending a shock of pleasure throughout and pulling a gasp from her. Cali could feel his smirk against her lips, heard the low chuckle in his throat and hardened her will against him. He repeated the motion, encircling the sensitive tip and flicking it gently, trying to elicit another response from his unwilling partner, but she refused to give him the satisfaction.
It wasn’t long before he’d backed her into his bed and had her laying on it, legs dangling off the side as he leaned over her. She had expected to him to go for it then, as he normally would, and was caught off guard when he instead brought his mouth to her chest and pressed a knee between her legs, spreading her so that her sex was tight against his pant leg. She almost made a noise when he ground it in, biting her tongue to stop the cry short. It hurt, but she could tell by the way his eyes flicked upward to watch her reaction that he wanted to see it on her face. Since she didn’t give it to him the first time he bit her, just hard enough, and she relented to him with a soft whimper.
He pulled his mouth from her breast and loomed above her with an expression on his face that she had a hard time labeling. She avoided looking directly into his eyes as he occasionally enjoyed using his ability to terrify her, then hold her down and take her as she thrashed in a blind panic. She found herself staring at his muscular chest instead and realized how easy it had become for her to forget just how attractive the bastard was and how drawn to him she had been so many years ago when they were both still in high school. Cali hadn’t been the only girl with a crush on Caleb O ‘Daugherty, and she was certain that she wasn’t the only one to discover the hard way just what kind of man he was.
That first time had been a rude awakening. When she ran into Caleb months after running away from home, she had thought she was lucky. He offered to let her stay at his place, ever so charming and nice, but that was just his power talking. The truth was that Caleb had been an unseen witness to her crime and when he spotted her in the crowd that fateful summer he saw his opportunity and he seized it.
She still couldn’t block out the day he told her that he had not only watched her murder her father, he had filmed it as well, and that if she didn’t do what he told her to, he would turn her in. She just stood there in tears, shocked, terrified, as he started pulling off her clothes and his. By the time she had found her voice it was too late, he'd taken her virginity, and he hadn't been gentle about it either. The worst part of it all was that he hadn’t needed to; she would have given herself to him willing, blinded as she was by the lie he sold her with a charming smile, and he knew it.
“I saw the way you looked at him today,” he said suddenly, snapping her back into the present. Her eyes flicked up to his lips, watching them move when he spoke. “Your friend, Jason.” Cali’s face flushed when Caleb said his name and she automatically began shaking her head to deny it but he cut her off with a loud scoff. “Yeah, I thought so. Don’t lie to me.”
"Caleb..." she pleaded,
"Sshhhh." She bit her tongue, afraid to make him mad. "Now I don’t really give a fuck if you have the hots for that goddamn pussy," He said with a growing smirk, "But the thing is, I don’t want you thinking about him while I’m fucking you." Her face growing hotter and hotter as he spoke and her insides were tying themselves into knots. "Don’t worry though, I’m going to help you forget about him."
When he reached down between her legs she cringed, fearing the worst, but he was gentle as he parted her folds with his fingers and slid them slowly inside her. She let herself relax, knowing then that he wasn’t planning on hurting her; this was going to be an entirely different game. His thumb moved upwards and targeted the small bundle of nerves that made up her clit, expertly teasing it while pulsating his fingers against the sensitive pad of tissue just inside of her entrance. She felt a rush of pleasure, the desire coupled with shame that he could so easily manipulate her body, already growing slick with desire as he pumped his digits in and out, in and out, in and out, until her breath quickened and came in soft pants.
The harder she tried not to respond, the more her body seemed to succumb to his cruel ministrations. Within minutes, she was lost in the sensations his touch brought, her ass pressing into the bed, chest arching into the air, hands gripping the sheets so tightly that her knuckles lost their color. Through all this he continued, greedily drinking in the sight of her as he stroked and caressed, his eyes brimming with sadistic lust. As she neared her breaking she began to cry out, quietly at first, shutting her eyes tightly.
"Look at me." She heard him growl through the fog of pleasure. He quickened his pace, knowing that she was on the edge, wanting to drive her deeper into it. "LOOK AT ME." Her eyes snapped open to see him right before her, their eyes locked and she came. He covered her mouth with his free hand as she all but screamed when the first wave of her climax hit her.
Her muffled cries of ecstasy continued on as she rode it out, heat flooding between her legs, her sex pulsing around his fingers. When it was finally over she was trembling and covered with sweat, guilt making her feel sick as she looked at Caleb, now standing between her legs and undoing his belt with measured calm. He freed his erect member from the confines of his jeans and grabbed a hold of her hips, jerking her to the edge of the bed and with a single thrust he sank his entire length inside of her, letting out a low groan as her muscles clenched him tightly.
He pulled back until only the tip of him was in her before slamming himself back in, this time pulling a gasp from her as well. He did it again and again, grinding himself into her at the end of each thrust, sending shudders up her spine. She felt his hands move under her rear, gripping her, his fingers digging into her flesh as he quickened his pace.
It was surprising how quickly she adjusted to his abuse, and in the aftermath of the orgasm he'd brought on her body was all too accommodating. He leaned in, pressing his chest to hers so that they were intimately closer than she was used to, and tangled his fingers in her hair. His lips found hers, then moved down to her neck where he lightly bit and sucked until he had coaxed a moan from her lips. This, coupled with his rhythmic thrusting, made her flush and squirm beneath him, a warmth pooling in her lower belly as the pleasure began to build again. His smile when he looked down at her, a knowing smirk that made her hate herself for what was happening, made her think that she would rather it hurt again, if only to spare her this shame.
He took his time and Cali wasn’t sure if it was just what he was in the mood for or if this was just another game he was winning because she started getting light headed and found her hips lifting to meet his, allowing him to push deeper into her. She was having a hard time focusing, her body begging her to let go, to stop fighting it and give in to the urges she was feeling. She asked herself if it really mattered at this point that she was struggling not to enjoy what he was doing to her. The damage was already done. They both knew he’d won.
He caught her eyes again and held them while he worked himself in and out of her sex. There was something in his gaze that seemed almost- possessive. It surprised her at first, but then she remembered the way he looked at Jason when no one was looking, shortly after hearing about the holiday party fiasco. Maybe the reason Caleb cornered her in the hallway wasn’t because he’d been afraid she had revealed him, maybe it was something much more discomforting; he was jealous of her affection for Jason. She gasped suddenly when Caleb slid an arm under her lower back, lifting her hips so that they were angled upwards. He pressed harder into her, purposely sliding the two of them further onto the bed while he buried his face in the curve of her neck, knowing that was where she was most sensitive.
“It feels good doesn’t it?” He whispered. The sensation of his breath in her ear made her tighten and sent goose-bumps along her flesh.
“No…” Cali panted, shaking her head side to side, but even she didn’t believe it. So she kept repeating it, as if saying the word would somehow make it true. “No, no, no, no, no…” Caleb laughed, sending another shudder though her, then continued teasing her neck with his lips, just barely touching the skin. When he finally started sucking on it, she moaned, seemingly unable stop herself.
“No, no, no…” Her protests grew louder but they quickly turned to wordless cries as she writhed blindly under him, once again about to come. She was raking her nails against the flesh of his back with her legs wound tightly around his waist, throwing back her head and then letting out a strangled cry when he slammed into her, holding himself deep within her recesses as his length pulsated and filled her with liquid heat. She clung and gasped and moaned as her body in turn milked him and, when she opened her eyes still in the throes of a climax, he was staring down at her again.
“This is a first.” His words brought her down from her high quickly as she realized what he meant by them; he hadn’t expected her to come again. While the first time had been intentional, a humiliating game he'd played with her often in the past, he'd never been able to bring her while he was inside of her and this time hadn't even been trying.
It killed her that it had happened, and though he had induced her passion earlier Cali was still shocked and ashamed that she'd reached a climax with him. Caleb untangled his limbs from hers and pulled out of her, leaving an aching feeling in his wake. She sat up and drew her legs close to her body, watching as he zipped up his fly and redid his belt, feeling nothing but disgust now that it was all over.
“I’m glad to see you’re finally coming around.”
When she didn’t give him a response he picked her clothes from off the floor and tossed them to her, then walked into his bathroom and shut the door. Cali just sat there, emotionally numb and exhausted, while she listened to the shower running. Time passed, the shower turned off and Caleb reappeared, still wet, with a towel wrapped around his waist. He saw her and cocked an eyebrow. “Are you waiting for an encore? Christ, get the fuck out, I have shit to do.”
She slid off of the bed and pulled on her clothes, hating the sticky dampness that covered her thighs. He opened the door for her and watched her walk out, then slammed it shut behind her. She walked down the hallway in a daze, oblivious to her completely disheveled appearance, pausing only before the door to Mile’s room.
Part of her wanted to go in, bury her face in his chest and cry until it felt better, but how could she do that after just having orgasmed in Caleb’s bed, only a room away from his? How could she even face him? She deserved to be alone after what she had just let happen, Cali decided as she tore her gaze from dorm room three-fourteen and forced herself to keep walking, if Jason ever found out he’d probably want nothing more to do with her.
She spent the rest of the night trying to scrub the sweat and filth from her skin, but no matter how many times she washed and rinsed and scrubbed her skin red, she still felt dirty. After a few hours she finally gave up and climbed into bed wet, sore, and ashamed.
Elle
- 27.01.2021
- 16
- 0
- Category:
- Reluctance
