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Some women are good at being alone. I would definitely be mistaken for one of them. I have lived the kind of laundry list of harrowing everyday pain women go through. I have endured the loneliness of a flooded flat, smear abnormalities, a broken heart and an empty bank account with all the grace of a feminist who knows that when it comes down to it, I cope without help. I am happy to pad around my flat in the red stockings and bra I purchased from Altrincham market for no one's pleasure but my own; I can lose days at a time in unaccompanied contentment. I am happy to sit in a restaurant and eat silently while people watch and wish they could join me, or even be in my place.
I'll tell you a secret; my body doesn't respond to solitude quite as well as my heart does. If I told you it was nymphomania, I'd be lying. I go grocery shopping without underwear or pick up strangers in bars. I have no judgment of the women not brave enough to do that. I'm really quite envious of them. No, I have a terrible problem with pride that leaves me with idle fingers and a lust that debases me even though no one can suspect it. Beneath my dignity, I will confess that I yearn and I am wet for human touch. I don't want the touch of someone who just met me and will fuck me and leave me in the morning. I know that a fumble will never satisfy the complicated and twisted tastes I have. I don't want the slow grind of a boyfriend who can schedule me in and whom I look at while he sleeps and ache for something I cannot have. I won't feel satisfied with on screen filth. I'm not a prude I do worse in real life, rather I hunger for a tangible touch. I hunger for the space between my flesh and yours, while it shimmers with the prospect of sex a cock deep in my pussy.
I wish I didn't feel this way. I expected to excel at celibacy the way I excel at most everything I try my hand at. The frustration starts so slowly. It's often just a look from a passerby. Some days it will be a result of the shock of red lipstick set with my auburn hair and the bold eye contact I give. But other days, I am trying to be invisible, when the stare from a man sets the tinder in my heart alight. I hate to be so aroused against my better nature, my hips swinging just a little more than I can help, my longing look that I can't conceal. I feel the simultaneous fear and hope that he may notice and stop. I honestly don't know what I would say if a guy ever does stop.
No, it doesn't take a lot these days. It could be his voice, the timbre of a man's voice as he says something commonplace, perhaps in a business meeting. The way the sound shapes in his throat will find a way between my legs and make my toes curl in desire. I want to possess the men I see, to seize them where they stand and remove whatever they wear while everyone else watches. It's as if I have forgotten what is underneath the suits and t shirts. It's like I have had my permission to look on them revoked. At the same time, there exists all that delicious skin that I can sense so keenly, beyond my view. I can recall the shoulders of every man I ever slept with, except these days it's not at my leisure, it's at my torture.
My friends think it is funny that after so many years of sexual adventure, I should retire for a time. It's still curiously unfashionable for a woman to admit to lust. We approve of women who are cartoonish in being voracious or women who are brave enough to plumb the depths of kink for our public titillation. But I am one of a legion of hidden women who censor our own day to day desires. We walk down the street and we work in your building and we are greedy for something we would never ask of you. There is something in us that is darker and needier and bottomless, we want, we want so much. We will never tell you so.

When I stand before the mirror naked, what I see now are the hands that used to own it. I wonder if the man who remarked on the curve of my waist and traced it with a tickle still remembers it. I wonder in whose mind, if anyone's, my nipples still swell. Just their reflection brings back the memory of the many mouths upon them, my nipples being bitten and pulled. The exquisite shame of wearing clamps with chains has left me and now all I remember is the pleasure. I can see my own sly surrenders and men who smiled at the conquests, all lived out on my pale skin. Each freckle is a reminder of a kiss, my back an unwelcome testament to the slow ecstasy of my true love's tongue, trailing up my spine towards my craning neck. I recall his slow delight in licking me there, because I had asked him to. It was weird. But I wanted him to so much so that he loved doing it, weird as it was.
I've tried to 'take care of it' - why do we still call masturbation 'taking care of it?'I take care of it quite often,(even now as I type) My lust is not an unruly pet or a household task to be completed. My synapses and my nerves crackle, I need, I need, I so desperately need to be fucked and it feels almost limbic. Maybe it is. I still find myself restless in my local sex store, while a woman who I might not have been attracted to in other circumstances, finds me batteries. I chatter a little more than I should while I pay, it's like she knows what is wrong with me.
Before he left me, I spent a chunk of a tax rebate on a sex toy (viva love honey what a web site girls). I figured I'd get the best that money could buy. I spent a few months so clumsy with the variety of settings that most of my orgasms were a shock. I'd simply pressed a button I didn't plan on pressing and cum by accident. Since then, I have worked through the buttons, this one, that one, combinations that make me shudder long before my brain is quite ready to give in. It being a toy, I have taken to playing, pressing my wet body up against the streaky bathroom tiles with one loud cry that I know my neighbours can hear. On the sofa, by candlelight with curtains which really aren't opaque. With the windows open in summer, while my pornographic moans float faintly on the humid air. Sometimes the mechanics of my vibrator will kick in and it will be a robotic fuck, designed to get me there quickly. Other times fantasy will take over and I will take a mental ride on the glory of riding him while he was cuffed to the bed and unable to protest.
There may only be so far I am prepared to go. The other week I found a smaller sex toy and held it up against my existing one, pretending to debate where it would go. But you know where I put it, right? As I feel the lube between my arse cheeks I always tell myself that I should be above this, but once I have hit the buttons I tremble with the kind of obscene gratification that I remember so fondly. I miss it. For one moment I am totally full and my flesh is alive and I make the sound I never make anytime else. It's a sound my body knew long before that confident ex boyfriend found a way to make me sing it out. His giving me anal sex on our first night together was so bold and surprising I gave in without question. It happened to be my very first time and the sound I made then is the same one I make every time, even though I am alone when I fall silent.
Loneliness is always that much worse when I am covered in lube and my own sense of completion. I am beautiful when I am breathless and flushed with my hair across the pillow, but there is no one to see it. I lie in the dark with no words to say and no one to hear them. There is no body to press my own into. I remember what it is to find someone else in the dark. I used to love hearing the shock or the pride in his voice, though I liked him better when he was rendered speechless. If I was to share something truly disgusting and taboo with you, it would be that 'I love you' is the thing I crave to hear, the thing I cannot replicate in any position now.
So this will go on. I will be the pretty young woman who smiles at you on the bus or files your paperwork. You won't know by looking at me how much I want to be fucked. You would never guess the lengths I have gone to in order to satiate myself. You would never have me down as the kind of girl who has dirty dreams about you that makes looking at you so hard, you won't be able to say why I can't meet your eyes. My fantasies will play across my mind while I screw up my nose at a newspaper or laugh with you on the phone. Maybe you will stand too close to me or tuck my long red hair behind my ear in a manner that is a little too familiar and I will give myself away for just a moment. Or you will watch me witness a couple greet each other, with my just parted lips and a gaze of envy. Maybe you will suspect. Even if you sense the chemistry in the air, I won't ever reveal my lust to you. But I want you so much it hurts not to have you. Thank you xhamster you are my life line.

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Part One “Look what I’ve got,” giggled Bron, Always the quickest of the two in spotting, noticing, thinking, doing and acting on things. Triumphantly she held up a noisily sealed package and tossing them to Tina, who caught them deftly. “Gosh well done, Paper knickers, I’d forgotten about those” Tina snickered reading the blurb on the plastic and keeping the surprise package out of sight of several people around. “One size, fifty in there, that’s enough, we’ll divide them later. Cyril...

2 years ago
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Payari bhabhi

Hello readers i’m (pabby) here again. Aaj mein aapko ek aur hot story bataunga. Hum ek baar out of station (mere chacha ke ghar) gaye the mein mere papa, bhaiyya, bhabhi or nandni bhabhi (mere tauji ki bahu). Hum wahan pahuche thodi der mein jub mien sub logo se mil liya to mien toilet bhaga kayon ki mujhey toilet bahut joor se aa raha tha. Mein teji se toilet ke aur bhaga. Mien darwaje ko teji se khola or under gaya udhar meine upni bhanhi ko niche sae nunga dekha. Unhone bhi mujhko dekh liya...

2 years ago
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Moving Away With Mom 2

Mom started kissing me back as I slide the straps on her nightgown off of her shoulders, on down her arms. She quite stroking my cock long enough to get the strap off of her right arm then went back to stroking my rock hard cock.As I slid the strap off of her left arm, I kissed my way down her chin onto her throat, on down on her chest till I got to the base of her right tit. I kissed and licked while altering back and forth between kisses and light flickering tongue licks as I went. I started...

3 years ago
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Mother Helps Son

Hi indian sex stories dot net readers. This is my first story in Indian Sex Stories dot net, so please avoid my mistakes if u found any. Now without any late, let us go to the real incident which happened to me and also happening to me. Let me introduce my self Rahul, I’m 24 years of old. I completed my master degree in reputed university. Now I’m in job searching work and still didn’t get any job. My mother name is Vaani and she is 45 years old. I don’t know about her sizes. This story was...

Incest
4 years ago
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Rules for a Blowjob

The point of a blow jobThis guide is written to help girls and women understand what is expected of them. The first thing you need to understand is: you are a slut. If you want to do what you are there to do, you cannot see yourself as a friend, wife, or lover. When a man looks down on you and sees you with his cock in his mouth, he sees you as a slut. You are his bitchDon't listen to the advice that tells you that a blowjob is intimate and tender. Blowjobs aren't really about physical...

2 years ago
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Nerdy Girl 2 the Wrath of Cum

Theresa squished the used condom in her jacket pocket with her thumb and forefinger as she walked up to her house. Her mind wandered back to her date, now over. Jay, another senior student, had asked her out during lunch earlier that week. Tonight, Friday, he had taken her to dinner at Burger King (blech), and then she drove them up to "Lover's Lane," where she had proceeded to give him a blowjob. She wasn't "easy," but she had an ulterior motive for the oral pleasuring. She didn't want...

2 years ago
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Vom braven Neffen zur Familienhure Teil 1

Hallo,dies hier ist die allererste Geschichte, die ich veröffentliche.Über sachliche Kritik zu Inhalt, Rechtschreibung, Grammatik und Interpunktion sowie Fortsetzungswünsche würde ich mich freuenAlso dann, viel Spaß.-----------------------------------------Es war mal wieder eine dieser langweiligen Familienfeiern.Oma feiert ihren 73. Geburtstag und meine Eltern ließen es sich natürlich nicht nehmen, mich auch in diesem Jahr ins ferne Mecklenburg Vorpommern mitzuschleppen. Der einzige...

2 years ago
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Kurts Dream

Kurt Wagner A.K.A. Nightcrawler, was sitting alone in his room, wondering what his life would have been like if he wasn't born x-gene positive. He wondered what he would have looked liked. But he realizes that he is different, he's a mutant. He is 5'8, weighs 138 pounds and has blue fur all over his body, has only has three digits on each hand and has a functional blue tail that ends in a triangular point. His special ability is he can teleport over short distances, through a side...

1 year ago
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Camping survival

Everyone here kept to themselves pretty much and weren't really very friendly. That was fine by me as long as they didn't cause me any trouble. In the six years we lived here we had no trouble out of anyone. They all seemed to respect everyone's privacy Our vacation plan this year was to go horseback into the mountains for a few of weeks of rough camping. We had been coming to the same spot for 5 years. It was a beautiful isolated high meadow we had seen from a small plane years ago. It...

2 years ago
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Nida and Safina

Any man would understand my situation I wake up in my shorts; with my cock poking through the slit at the front; hard and throbbing, demanding attention. It was 11 am on a bright sunny Karachi Sunday morning and I was home alone. I took the burning hot shaft of my man meat in my hand and gently began the ancient ritual of masturbation. I thought about all the girls I would like to fuck... and there were many... but unable to fix my mind on one, I gave up and sat up in bed feeling disgusted...

1 year ago
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Anna Nagar Aunty In Theater 8211 Part 3

Hi friends, SORRY for the long delay as I was busy with many stuffs in life, for those who don’t know me a small intro. This is my third story ever in Indian Sex Stories so please bear with any mistakes only name has been changed for identity purpose. First let me introduce myself Vinay (name changed) a 23 year old teenage boy finished my bachelors in CSE from a well reputed college in Chennai lives in Adayar looking after my dad’s business and live with my family. I myself call as the “king of...

4 years ago
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Toman of the CherokeeChapter 22

Merlin Gwendydd - Sister Morgenau - Brother Morial - Brother Morien - Brother Mordaf - Brother - Naci’s Father New Council Members Pikon Corth Groton Tydeth Docal Clondal - female Lyndeth - female Creton ---- Merlin Gwendydd - sister Morgenau - brother Morial - brother Morien - brother Mordaf - brother - Naci’s father New Council Members Pikon Corth Groton Tydeth Docal Clondal - female Lyndeth - female Creton I was pissed as hell. Other than my mother Drenna and Morganna I could...

3 years ago
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in Laws part 1

IN LAWs Part 1We are a married couple since 15 years . My self i have a normal look while my wife is very hot and sexy. She does turn heads every time we are out. Her north african features are made to tease men and sometimes women.At the he bigining I felt jeaolus when somebody tried to flurt with her , later one I started to enjoy it. We would talk about it anotherwhen we are fucking and I felt it increased our sex drive. The idea increased till i reached the point of thinking of a threesome...

1 year ago
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Kitten Chapter 12

Chapter 1The boys had left a few hours earlier with their dad for their annual car trip to his family's place in Ohio. She missed the boys, not the ex husband, but would take the time to enjoy her life a bit and have some fun with herself and her man. He was coming over later tonight after work. He wasn't a perfect man by any means but he was smart, funny, and treated her like a princess. They had planned a wonderful night of a long dinner and some time on the dance floor before returning to...

Oral Sex
4 years ago
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Thunder in the Desert

Alex pulled himself another agonizing inch up the steep wall of the gully. Just a couple more feet and he would be safe, but every breath felt like a knife plunging into his side where his rib had been broken. The rest of him was in no better shape, either. His left eye was swollen shut, and the flap of skin hanging from the cheek beneath it left bone exposed. There was hardly an inch of his body that wasn't deeply bruised and gouged by the chains with which the motorcycle gang had beaten...

3 years ago
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Queen of JariloChapter 6 Bug Hunt

Walker stopped on the hill that overlooked the base, so small in the distance now that he could have covered it with his thumb. Kaz leaned against one of the massive trees beside him, the morning sun bleeding through its branches, watching as he brought up a holographic map on his wrist computer. “Do they have any idea where the attack came from?” she asked. “Vaguely, the first sensor was tripped ... here,” he said as he pointed to a location marked with a red dot on the terrain. “The...

1 year ago
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Marks Coerced Womanhood

Mark's Coerced Womanhoodby Denise CChapter 1: Mark and EmilyMark's life was boring. After graduating from College, he found a job as a loan officer at a bank in Sacramento. An average looking guy, he was naturally shy and struggled at relationships with women. But five years later, he was doing well at the bank. Promotion seemed near and, if he could find the time, he was about ready to upgrade from his apartment to a small house. His sex life, however, was not as good. Mostly, it consisted of...

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