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Inmate By: Joseph M. Sheeler 01/14/1999 "Being a criminal is the only life for me," thought the 21 year old, Alex Shartelle, as he ran out the back door of the house, " because women are rich and single these days!" Alex remembered his grandfather telling him about growing up in the technology boom of the 22nd century. There hadn't been very much material wealth within easy reach because everyone was putting their money in technology. This was great for a man like his grandfather who had devoted his life to science but not for Alex. Worse yet, there was a resurgence of emphasis on family life, initiated by the United Christian Coalition. As Alex ran out the back door, he heard the woman crying because of the humiliation that he had inflicted on her, but was never one to suffer from pangs of guilt. He loved sex almost as much as he loved money but had never been very good with the committal aspect of relationships. "Love 'em - n- leave 'em" was Alex's motto, even if he had been burglarizing the house at the time. He knew, somewhere in the furthest reaches of his callous mind, that forcing sex on a woman could hardly be considered as love, but he really didn't care. At 6' 8", however, there were not many women who could argue the point against him, so he always got his way. Just as he reached the bottom of the stairs of the back porch, Alex thought that he heard a door slam somewhere in the house. It sounded like the woman was still crying in the living room where he had left her and her husband was on at an F.O.P. conference in Minneapolis. He decided that it was just his overly active imagination and reminded himself that he always got his way. He continued around the side of the house, running effortlessly toward where he had parked his car absently fondling the wad of cash he had just stolen in his right hand. Alex barely saw the 2 x 4 arching toward his head in the darkness as he cleared the corner of the house, entering into the front yard. He felt a searing pain in his head and everything became temporarily confused, though he felt the distinct sensation of falling. His vision went dark, leaving him blind, but he heard a male voice, husky with rage, shouting something at him. He did his best to listen to what was being said over the roaring that was filling his ears. "Roarrr...ain silent. Any... roarrr ...eld against you in a co... " said the voice with obvious disdain before everything went suddenly silent. Some time later, Alex found himself lying face down on a lacquered table extending from the wall. His head throbbed as he slowly sat up and allowed his eyes to adjust to the light. The room was about 10' by 8' and reeked of the foul smell of cigarettes smoke. From the ash tray built into the table, he deduced that at least fifty cigarettes had been consumed in this room that day alone. The room itself had gray walls, that looked as if they might have once been white, and a single door in the far right corner. After a few attempts to stand, all of which had been thwarted by extreme dizzy spells, the door opened and two men walked in. One of them was a fat pompous looking man with a pudgy pig-like face and a finely polished badge. The other was a lean blocky youth wearing a similar badge and carrying a shot gun. Alex noticed that the young police officer was glaring at him, his expression betraying tremendous hatred. "Do you recall your rights, Mr. Shartelle?" asked the pompous officer as he plopped into the chair opposite Alex. Alex absently shook his head affirmatively, remembering fragments of the shouting, but instantly wished that he hadn't. "Let the record show that the suspect has been read his rights," declared the overweight officer in an exceptionally loud voice. Again, Alex noticed the baleful glare of the officer with the shot gun and wondered what might have made this man so bitter. He looked back at the hefty officer and observed that he was a sergeant and therefore he might be able to gain some leverage with a properly negotiated bribe. As he was about to speak, he suddenly recognized the obese police officer from a description given by one of his associates. He quickly sought out the name tag and confirmed his worst fears, that this was indeed Sergeant Flast. With an experienced eye, Alex quickly sized up the sentry and decided that if he could take them by surprise, he could take the man in a fight before anyone could assist. He quickly decided that it was a good plan so he spent a moment clearing the dizziness from his head. When he felt ready, he jumped up and rushed menacingly around the table toward the policeman with the shotgun. For a moment, he thought he was going to succeed until he was suddenly stopped short but two gigantic shotgun barrels. "Just give me a reason to shoot you, scum bag!" urged the young officer contemptuously between clenched teeth. The interrogation was long and tedious, lasting nearly 21 hours, but the police got the confession they needed to convict Alex. Alex reprimanded himself time and time again for losing control of the situation before he realized that he was hopelessly out matched in the linguistic arts. After a night and a day of disastrous confessions, he was finally led to a temporary holding cell for the night. He was told to get plenty of sleep because his court hearing was scheduled for the coming day. "But I haven't even talked to my lawyer yet," protested Alex to deaf ears, while trying to stifle a yawn. The next morning, a man entered Alex's cell, identifying himself as Samuel Deekes, the federal defense attorney assigned to his case. After an hour of questions that reminded him of the interrogation he had suffered through the previous day, the lawyer advised that Alex try for a plea bargain. Although it distressed him that his "perfect record" would be destroyed, he accepted the advice, allowing the lawyer to perform his judicial function. The lawyer departed leaving Alex to wonder if he might have just made a very serious mistake. A few moments later, he was hand-cuffed and escorted out of the cell for his day in court. He grimaced at his present current condition, a days growth on his face, wrinkled clothes, and smelling of smoke and sweat. As he boarded the prison transport bus, he glanced over his shoulder and noticed that the police officer that had wielded the shotgun the night before was glaring at him again. He had never met this man before in his life and didn't understand why this man would despise him so much. Again he shrugged it off and sat in the first seat in the transport. Alex was escorted into the prisoner section of the court room to wait for his hearing to begin. There was only one person being tried before him, the proceedings of which he paid extremely close attention. He had never been interested in law before, in fact he disdained law, so he had never taken the time to watch what actually transpired in a court room. Having absolutely no idea what to expect, he was poised at the edge of his seat through the entire ten minute event. The young man was brought to the defendants table and helped, still hand- cuffed, into his seat. The defense council stood and waited to be addressed but the elderly judge sitting on the bench. The judge seemed to be taking her good sweet time about beginning the days workload. Alex's heart sank at the sight of a female judge. "The accused is charged with petty theft, first time charge," stated the judge in a weary tone of voice. "How does the defense plead?" "Guilty, your honor," answered the defense attorney "Please make your arguments, councilor," said the judge as part of this age old ritual. "If it pleases the court, this young man just made a mistake of falling victim to the ill effects of peer pressure," the lawyer explained. "He was led to believe that shop lifting was acceptable behavior by some of his less reputable associates. The defense calls upon the mercy of the court." The judge sat behind the bench, leafing through papers and nodding approvingly periodically. "The court finds the accused guilty of petty-theft," concluded the judge after a short pause. "Michael Paul Tibanne, by all rights, you should serve time for your despicable behavior. Unfortunately, the prisons have long since been full beyond sanitary capacity. Therefore, you are sentenced to six months probation and community service." The judge banged the gavel, a tradition that had survived the test of time in the judicial arena, indicating the end of the trial. After the young man had been escorted from the court room, the bailiff approached the bench and handed her a folder which she accepted with a tired expression. As Alex was being led to the defense table, the expression of the judge transformed from fatigue to open contempt, leaving Alex with the feeling that he was in serious trouble. He sat down as his lawyer took his place standing beside the table. As he thought about the punishment received by the young man, he felt a glimmer of hope that he might be set free after all. "The accused is charged with rape, larceny, aggravated assault, trespassing on private property, willful destruction of private property, and resisting arresting arrest," accused the judge malevolently. "How does the defense plead?" "Guilty, your honor." "Please make your arguments councilor," added the judge grudgingly. "If it pleases the court, the defendant feels that he was a victim of circumstances," said the attorney "He suggests that the confessions were coerced and thus begs the mercy of the court." There was a substantial delay as the judge sat frowning over the paperwork that she had been handed at the beginning of the trial. Nearly half an hour later, the judge looked up at Alex and back at the paperwork on her desk. "Alex Samuel Shartelle, your crime is beyond reproach. As dictated by precedence, you are hereby sentenced to life imprisonment, effectively immediately," lectured the judge. "Unfortunately, as I'm sure you have already gathered, there is no room in any of the male prisons. It is therefore decreed, that you shall be placed on a waiting list to serve your time in prison. You will be cryogenically frozen until there is room for you to serve your sentence." "No!" shouted Alex as the judge lifted the gavel to end the trial. "Councilor, please find out what the problem is, quickly," commanded the judge, obviously irritated by the disruption. During a brief council, Alex conveyed to his lawyer that he would rather die than to be placed in one of those freezers, that he had read about in Society Magazine, where they mess with your mind while you lay helpless. The lawyer took a moment to consult some papers that he pulled from his briefcase before he assumed his position, standing beside the table. Alex felt relived that his objection was at least being heard. He waited anxiously to hear what fate would befall him in this highly inhumane display of prejudice. "Well?" demanded the judge. "My client alleges to wish death above the sentenced punishment, your honor," offered the lawyer, "but there is another way." "Please approach the bench, councilor," invited the lawyer. The lawyer approached the bench for a few minutes though Alex could hear nothing of what was said. Just when he felt that he couldn't bear it anymore, the lawyer finally returned to his place beside the table and waited. Alex had no clue what to expect but hoped that it would be better than losing his identity in an ice-box. He looked up, his anxiety clearly visible, as the judge began to speak. "Mr. Shartelle," gloated the judge, trying to conceal her pleasure for his apparent anxiety, " although nothing would give me more pleasure than to grant you your petition for death, that punishment is not an option for a first time rapist, though I highly doubt that this is your first time. Defense has offered an alternative, however, that allows you to serve you time immediately and offers a much more fitting punishment for the nature of your crime. You are therefore sentenced to a fine of $20,000,000 and one year in the Stockdale Federal Correctional Facility, effective immediately." Before anyone could object, the judge banged the gavel three times and Alex was led out of the court room. Alex could not believe this stroke of fortune that his lawyer had somehow managed to negotiate. Only one year and he was free to live life as he chose, where he chose, with minimal punishment. He gleefully considered how easy it would be to recover the money he had lost while his youth was a completely different story. He decided that next time he brushed with the law, he wanted Mr. Deekes as his personal lawyer. Alex was taken to a holding area where he waited for several hours before the prisoner transport arrived. He was lined up behind several women to be checked for any potential weapon or tool capable of providing an escape. He thought that there must be some mistake but admitted that serving time at a female prison sounded ideal to him. Within moments, he was seated and the transport was flying toward Stockdale. As transport neared the destination, Alex decided that this could provide considerable entertainment for a man such as himself. The transport landed just long enough for the new prisoners to be unloaded and the new releases to be loaded. Alex was marched, still behind the women, beneath a massive portcullis that secured a long entrance. They continued across a vast court and through the heavy oak door that stood formidably in the center of a three story stone wall. Having never been in a castle before, Alex's curiosity was almost as great as the arousal he felt from the exquisite view he was being provided. Once inside, however, the women were taken into one room while Alex was led into another. He supposed that special processing was necessary for a man to co-exist in a female prison. He was set in a chair, resembling a folded up table, and told to wait for the doctor to conduct the preliminary examination and a few preparations. He was not sure what, exactly, this entailed so he just accepted that it was all standard procedure to avoid any liability and would all be over soon. The doctor entered the room from the door on the far wall and moved over to the instrument table behind the chair. It was uncomfortable for Alex to shift around in the chair he had been placed in so he settled himself to wait. A moment later, he felt a sharp pain in his neck as the pressure forced stream of fluid was shot through is skin, into his carotid artery. An extremely cold cloth was pressed against the point of injection and the doctor asked Alex to hold it tightly in place. Despite his extreme annoyance, he complied with the doctor's request and held the cloth there for several long minutes. Finally, the doctor came around, unfolded the chair into an examination table, and conducted a thorough examination. Alex was not fond of being prodded and poked in such ways, yet he knew that he was not at liberty to object. The table was folded back into a chair and the doctor produced some electric clippers. Without a word, he removed all of the hair from Alex's head, catching it in a small trash can that he carried around. A short time after the doctor had finished and left the room, a guard entered and escorted Alex through many long corridors. He felt somehow very listless and couldn't seem to muster any concern or interest about what was happening to him at the moment. The march finally ended at a cell at the end of a long hallway, secured by an eight foot heavy oak door with a barred window. Once he was inside the cell, they took his shoes and socks as they left, closing with a resounding thud and bolting it into place. The room was a small room, only 10 feet by 15 feet, though five feet of the room were on the other side of relatively thin steel bars. The far wall, also on the other side of the bars, was completely covered by a mirror. Alex stared at in without much interest, not able to comprehend what it might be there fore. Aside from the mirror, the room contained a toilet, without a seat, built into the wall, a sink without a drain stopper, a drawer built into the wall, and an iron framed bed that was bolted to the floor. On the wall above the sink were three dispensers labeled shaving cream, soap, and tooth paste. A plastic holder, also attached to the wall above the sink contained a plastic bladed razor and a tooth brush. It was easy for Alex to deduce that the injection he had received before his physical examination was a sedative because he was feeling extremely drowsy at the moment. He figured that it was probably to prevent him from doing anything brash too soon, thus allowing him time to adjust to his new environment. He eyed the bed appreciatively for a moment before shuffling over to it and lying down. He was mildly annoyed that the bed was so short, but he was too tired at that moment to complain. He decided that he would take up the issue in the morning as he drifted off to sleep. Alex awoke the next morning with a dull ache throughout his body that proved to be very uncomfortable. Even more uncomfortable, however, was his dire need to empty intestines. It took him a couple tries to sit up and even longer to get out of bed. The stone floor was cold against his bare feet as he sat on the edge of the bed. There were no clocks in the cell but he guessed that it was some time around 7:00 in the morning. He thought that the discomfort was originating from sore, stiff muscles and that stretching would make everything better. When he tried to stand, Alex was thwarted by a dizzy spell reminiscent of some of his drinking binges during which he didn't eat for more than a day. He remembered the injection he had been given and wondered how long it had rendered him unconscious. He felt hungry enough now that he didn't think that a seven course dinner would satiate him. He had not choice about waiting for his food, however, he couldn't wait any longer to use the toilet. He must have been sick to his stomach because he had a serious case of diarrhea. His urine came out in a long steady stream as if he had been storing water in his bladder for days. He sat there for nearly twenty minutes until he felt completely empty inside. He could not imagine where all that excretion had come from, especially since he hadn't eaten more very much over the past two days. Once he had relieved himself, Alex started looking around to see what he could find. The drawer that was built into the wall was empty, as he had expected, and he was not able to move the bed. There was nothing else in the room of any interest so he moved over to the sink and shaved the four day old beard. The razor had a plastic blade, presumably to keep prisoners from harming themselves while in the custody of the prison. He managed to remove most of the hair, however, so he at least felt cleaner. He glanced down to see what else was available to him concerning personal grooming. There was a pair of flat head plastic tweezers, a toothbrush, tooth paste, a small plastic brush, soap, and a wash cloth. Alex brushed his teeth, since he hadn't gotten that far the night before, and washed his face and hair with the soap. When he was done, he rung out the wash cloth and used it to dry his hair as best as he could before he brushed it. Without warning, a loud grinding sound erupted from a wall somewhere in the room causing Alex to jump out of his skin. He casually glanced over his shoulder after he had regained the better part of his usual composure. His curiosity was instantly aroused as he watched a section of the wall retreat from its normal plane to form a doorway. He fought down a dizzy spell as he stood up and walked over to the bars between him and the opening for a closer look. As Alex approached the bars, an aged woman walked through the opening pushing a cart laden with food. He unconsciously licked his lips several times before he realized that he was staring at the food and salivating. He quickly turned away and pretended not to be interested but was rewarded only with another dizzy spell caused by the sudden motion. He could not resist the smell of the food, however, and turned slowly back towards the coveted prize. "Excuse me, what is today's date?" asked Alex, suddenly remembering his concern about the duration of his drug induced siesta. "I'm sorry, Larissa," apologized the woman, "but I'm not allowed to answer any questions. Here is your food. Someone will be back in a few hours to pick up the cart." "What?" ask Alex, decidedly confused. "My name is Alex and all I want to know is the time and date for Christ's sake!" The elderly woman retreated through the passage without another word. The loud grinding sound erupted again except that this time the section of wall was restored to its original position. Alex sighed with exasperation, paying absolutely no attention to the mechanical wonder taking place and focused his sole attention on the food sitting in front of him. All they had given him to eat with was a short plastic spoon but he wouldn't have cared, at that particular moment, if he had been forced to eat with his hands. The food was delicious and solved the problem of the dizzy spells he had suffered from since he woke up. After his meal, picked up the little bundle of clothes lying on the bottom of the cart. He couldn't think why they would be bringing him matching panties and bra, considering his obvious manhood. He was about to put both undergarments back when he realized that he had been wearing the same pair of underwear for many days now. Feeling very foolish, he replaced his grungy, smelly underwear with the fresh, silky panties. He quickly put his pants back on before anyone could notice. He considered hiding his underwear under the bed but the smell was enough to convince him to put it on the cart. After a moment of contemplation, Alex accepted that panties were all they would have available in a woman's prison. He put his mind at ease that this was only a temporary situation, and set about alleviating the incessant discomfort he had been feeling. His athletic prowess once again proved to be his ally as he easily stretched the stiffness out of his muscles. He was distressed to find, however, that deep down, he still felt sore. Alex glanced over at the mirror on the far wall. Despite the bars, he was provided a full height image of himself to admire, and admire it he did. He had always known that he was handsome and all of the women he encountered inevitably supported his theory. He considered himself so much better than women that he could not maintain any respect for them. As a result, he used and abused them. Reasoning that exercise would do him a world of good, Alex proceeded with a stationary workout. He only got through about ten minutes of jumping jacks, however, before his stomach acted up again. He thought that his illness served him right since he had eaten so much at once. After another long while sitting on the toilet, he continued his exercise and worked up a healthy sweat that made him feel extremely good. After that, he did just over twenty minutes of running in place, followed by some mime jump rope. Several times, he considered stopping but ever time decided each time that working out was about all he had to do anyway. He wondered briefly if the ventilation to this room was adequate for this much exercising. A few hours after his morning meal, Alex was amazingly hungry again and was certain that he shouldn't be. He attributed it to his illness since his morning activities hadn't required much exertion. Thinking back over the morning to try take his mind off of his hunger, he realized that while he was exercising, he had completely forgotten about the mild pain he was experiencing. Alex's contemplation was interrupted by the grinding sound he had heard earlier and he quickly turned toward the bars. As expected, the panel receded and a woman entered through the revealed opening pushing a cart filled to the brim with food. This was a much younger woman with an average body and short brunette hair. This was his chance to get the information that he so desperately wanted to know. "Hey babe," began Alex, trying to turn on the charm. "Here is your food, Larissa," interrupted the young woman, "enjoy." Alex glanced down at the food and then stared at the woman who had ignored his irresistible charm, seemingly without any effort. He had seduced thousands of women from all walks of life with the ease that a mouse fits under the door. Was this woman a lesbian? That shouldn't matter, however, since he had even seduced lesbians before. He wondered frantically what had gone wrong. "All I want is to know the date and time," pleaded Alex, his charm washed away by momentary doubt. "I'm sorry Larissa," exclaimed the woman with obvious sincerity, "but I'm not allowed to answer any questions." There was that name again. Alex suddenly remembered the earlier visit by the elderly lady who had called him the same thing. Were these women blind? Couldn't they see that he was someone that could make their wildest dreams come true? "My name is Alex," he declared, but the woman had already disappeared through the opening with the empty cart. Pushing the incident out of his mind, he dug into the food, certain that he wouldn't be able to finish it all. Not only did he finish it however, but he was not full after all of the food had been consumed. He wondered what eating so much would do to the athletic build that had been his pride and joy throughout his adult life. He pulled up his shirt but could see nothing wrong with his splendidly sexy abs. He decided that more exercise was definitely in order. He didn't have time to return to his exercising before his stomach acted up again. While he sat on the toilet, he considered that perhaps these women were simply frightened of some higher authority. This would explain why they didn't seem affected by his charm. After further deliberation, he decided that he would try intimidation next time food was delivered. After a while, he got up and moved the flush the commode when he noticed that most of his excretion was white. He couldn't remember this ever happening to him again but he didn't know what could possibly be happening to him. Without further consideration, he returned to his exercising. A little while later, the grinding sound was heard again so Alex rushed over to the bars to confront the visitor. A slender but well endowed woman with blond hair falling half way to her waist walked in pushing a cart with lots of food on it. He began eyeing the food greedily before he realized it and reprimanded himself for losing control. He pulled himself up to his full height and fixed the woman with a stern look. "My name is Alex and I want some answers now!" he insisted in the most threatening voice he could manage. Alex thought he saw the woman flinch but he wasn't sure and she certainly didn't slow in her duties. Her cart squeaked enough to be annoying, even for the short trip from the door to the bars. As she moved into the light, he could tell that this server was no more than a girl and wondered what could have landed her in prison. He thought about asking her but quickly opted for more intimidation. "Of course you do Larissa," stated the girl flatly. Alex was taken aback by her distinct disregard for his size and stature towering over her. "Doesn't she realize that he could easily reach out, grab her and throttle her before she could even scream? And why do these women keep calling me Larissa?" Alex decided that enough was enough. When she stepped within his reach, he grabbed through the bars, barely missing her arm as she deftly dodged his attempted capture. "You do that again, Larissa," scolded the girl, "and you will go without your meals for a whole day." That was enough to convince Alex that he should not attempt that again. He glanced again at the food but his curiosity got the better of him. "Please give me some answers," begged Alex, "I only want to know..." "I'm sorry, Larissa," interjected the girl, "but I'm sure you know by now that I'm not allowed to answer your questions." Alex gave up on the girl and concentrated on the food. He could not believe that he was this hungry for the third time and he didn't think that it was even dinner time yet. When the fourth server came in, her hair only hanging to her shoulders, Alex noticed that she seemed to be somewhat taller than the other women. She wheeled the cart over and removed the other one, just as all the other women had done before her. Alex gave her a curious glance but was mostly concerned with his much needed meal. "Enjoy your meal, Larissa," offered the woman as she pushed the squeaky cart out of the cell. Alex looked up from his meal at the mention of 'Larissa' but quickly reprimanded himself when he realized what he had done. "My name is ALEX!" he shouted, even though the door was already sliding noisily back into place. During the time between the fourth and fifth meal of the day, Alex did nothing but sit on the toilet and remind himself that his name was Alex and NOT Larissa. When the next meal came, he was once again very hungry and the stiffness in his muscles had returned, presumably from lack of activity. He pulled up his shirt and glanced down at his waste line, half expecting to see expansion in that abdominal region. On the other hand, he also half expected to find that he had lost some weight, though this somehow didn't seem possible. Over the next couple days, Alex generally ate, groomed, and exercised when he wasn't going to the bathroom or sleeping. He shaved and washed everyday, and changed into the new panties provided with the first meal of the day. He couldn't figure out why they kept bringing the bra but concluded that it wasn't his problem. He watched the hollovision, initially, only once in a while because there was little about women, except having sex with them, that he was interested in. Increasingly throughout the week, he found himself watching the holovision on the other side of the bars. With each meal, he noticed that the women they were sending to serve them were getting taller and taller. He also noticed that he was definitely losing weight despite the extreme amount of food that he was eating every day. He supposed, however, that he was ill and that could explain his weight loss. Every morning he woke up hungry and every evening he went to bed hungry. His only other notable activity was the constant reminders that his name was 'Alex', which he, for some reason, regularly seemed to forget. By the fifth day of captivity, he was beginning to wonder if they were going to keep him in solitary confinement for the entire year. He thought he had read somewhere that the maximum time in solitary was seventy two hours, which meant that he should have been let out, uh, how many days ago? He had lost all track of time and nobody would tell him what the date was. Besides that, Alex had noticed that the mirror seemed considerably further away, and taller for that matter. He initially explained it with tricks of the walls, just like the sliding section that covered the doorway. He later explained it that the roof and far wall had actually moved, making everything appear to be of greater proportion. One of the most frightening revelation of all, however, was that 'they' had somehow changed beds on him without him noticing. How else could it be that his feet no longer poked out over the end of the bed when he slept? Alex had grown accustomed to the feel of the panties and changing every morning. It seemed to him that the panties fit him considerably better than his pants did these days. He had lost count of the number of times he had needed to roll up his pant and sleeve cuffs, but didn't really care anymore. He was a little confused by the increased amount of excess string hanging from his waste band these days but decided that loosing a little weight could only add to his overall charisma. Shortly after the last meal of the seventh day, Alex was frightened by a voice outside of the heavy oak door. "Larissa?" the voice repeated several times before Alex had caught his breath and regained enough composure to respond. He had long since given up on reminding anyone but himself of who he was so he simply went along with their little game. "What?" asked Alex with a little indigence. "We are coming in now so please stand away from the door," requested the voice from outside. Without argument, Alex stood back and watched as the door opened slowly inward. Two of the largest men he had ever seen walked through the doorway, both carrying riffles. The didn't fill the doorway as he would have expected but the both towered over him and dwarfed his stature. He estimated that these men must have easily been seven feet tall. As the stood before him, he realized without much surprise that he had answered to the name Larissa again. "You are required to accompany us for your examination," ordered one of the guards. Alex walked sandwiched between the guards back through the corridor to the room where he had received his last examination. After they had sat him in the chair, he determined that this must just look like the room because he remembered the chair he had sat in before as being much smaller than this one. He had gotten comfortable and almost dozed off when he felt a sharp pain in Alex's neck, forcing him mind instantly alert. The doctor handed him a cold cloth and instructed him to hold it against his neck while the chair was adjusted. Alex was glad to see that at least the doctor seemed to be the same height. "Doctor, why have I lost so much weight lately?" asked Alex, hoping finally to get some answers. The doctor ignored him as he proceeded to conduct another thorough examination. Alex asked his question several times more, without result, before he finally gave up, slumping into a sour mood. After the doctor had left, the two extremely tall guards returned and escorted Alex back to his cell. Again he felt the tranquilizing effects of the injection he had just been given and was thankful for the sight of his bed. He thought hazily that he had to escape because he couldn't stay in solitary confinement for a whole year but the consideration was quickly lost to sleep. When Alex awoke the next morning, the dull ache that had been his constant companion over the past week was gone. He quickly realized, however, that he was itching all over his body but was not able to stop it. Unlike with the aching, however, exercise did absolutely nothing for the itching, except, perhaps, to make it worse. He quickly decided that there would be no more exercising until he could get back to see the doctor and find out what was wrong. Alex waited anxiously for his first meal to arrive, passing the time by watching a demonstration of a woman douching on the holovision. He thought that the process was rather disgusting, and that the demonstration contained entirely too much graphic detail, but he seemed compelled to watch it, almost to the degree of studying it, anyway. When he heard the familiar grinding, he turned away from the holovision thinking how glad he was that he was a man. The meal was as delicious as usual but Alex found that he just couldn't finish it all. He expected to feel the dire need to defecate but found that he simply felt full. He was hungry again after a few hours, as he expected, but no more food was delivered. When he couldn't wait anymore, he ate the left- over food from his earlier meal and returned to the holovision. A new demonstration had begun providing a close-up view of a woman braiding her hair. Alex had always liked looking at women who wore their hair braided, though he had never cared how it was done. Now, for some reason, he found himself wishing that his hair was long enough to test his knew knowledge. He quickly realized how ludicrous it was for him to think that way and silently, but with less conviction than before, scolded himself. The next meal was delivered a few hours later by a woman almost as tall as those two guards that had come for him the night before. Alex was amazed, and a little intimidated, that there were women that were taller than himself. He had always thought of his considerable height as a formidable tool for subduing women. He was rather distressed to learn that there were women in this institution who dwarfed him by comparison. Alex ate less than he would have because of his state of mild depression. He didn't understand where he had lost control of this whole overwhelming situation. He had been given a chance of a lifetime, to seduce all the women that he could handle, only to find that all of his gifts were useless. His mood swung back up, however, when he noticed the holovision showing a fashion show. Alex hoped that watching pretty women swagger down the runway would help to restore some of his waning confidence. One of the dresses caught Alex's attention above all of the others that he had seen. He tried to convince himself that the woman modeling the dress was prettier than all the rest of them. While he watched the model parade out and back, however, he became acutely aware of his own ill-fitting clothes. The outer seem of his pants that covered the pelvis had come unraveled on both sides. He assumed that the stitching had just worn out, considering that he had been wearing these pants everyday for more than a week. Alex waited for the next meal to be served that night because he really wanted some clothes that fit. The itching was bad enough but to hear his pants ripping little by little every time he got up or sat down was unbearable. When he heard the grinding and ran to the bars so he could ask for a change of clothes. A shorter woman walked in with extremely short hair pushing the dinner cart. "Is it possible to get some clean clothes?" requested Alex. "Preferably clothes that fit," continued Alex blankly, thinking of that pretty dress that had just been modeled. "And that don't stretch so much just because they have gotten dirty," added Larissa quickly as an afterthought, but couldn't quite figure out why she had said it. The young woman smiled at him as she pushed the cart into position and moved over to the empty cart. "I'll see what I can do, Larissa," offered the woman as she made her way out of the cell. "Oh, thank you so much," exclaimed Larissa, a tear forming in her eye for the kindness she was being shown. Alex caught himself and fumed about it for nearly five minutes before he even considered the food. How could he allow himself to consider a mere woman as his equal, regardless of his current predicament. What was wrong with him anyway, had he really wanted a dress like the one that wretched model had been wearing. He resolved that he would address this problem as soon as he was done eating. When Alex had eaten his fill, he started to review the events of the past two weeks when he noticed the display of the holovision. A woman had just begun the mystical process of giving herself a manicure. Alex had always loved the look of long nails on a woman so he wanted to find out what they had to go through. After a few moments, the woman paused to let the base coat dry. Alex looked down at his own hands and noticed with distant concern that they seemed awfully small. "I wonder how they would look with such beautiful nails?" considered Alex with growing concern for his crazy behavior. He admonished himself mercilessly because of his perceived deviance from the strength and fortitude he had once possessed. No matter what he did, however, he just couldn't dismiss the desire for a manicure. The woman on the holovision had continued, finishing the fingernails and beginning the toenails. Alex sat and watched wistfully, his mind absorbed with learning all there was to learn. He watched the holovision without moving for several hours until sleep began to overtake him. He was quite startled when he heard a shuffling from the other side of his bed and went to investigate. The only thing of interest in the area was the drawer so he opened it and found the nightgown folded within. After briefly considering that he was doing the wrong thing, he slipped into the nightgown, curled up in the bed, and fell asleep wondering where the night had come from. As usual, he decided to check it out in the morning. Larissa woke late that morning to the grinding sound of the opening wall panel. She had gotten up and run over to the bars for her much desired food before Alex realized what he was doing. It was too late, however, the girl had already come through the door with the cart of food. Alex imagined that she was laughing at him and bowed his head, bringing him face to face with the source of his embarrassment. He silently screamed at himself when he felt the tears welling up in his eyes. "I'm not Larissa," he whispered feebly to himself. "Now, now, Larissa," soothed the server, "I brought you your new clothes." Alex looked up at her through tear blurred eyes and smiled at her gratefully. He really hadn't wanted to wear those over-stretched tatters he had been wearing. The woman was as tall as he was, which didn't help his current mood any. As she walked away, Alex saw that she wore a ponytail that fell about half way down her back. Alex stared blankly at the food on the cart as he thought about all the beautiful ways such luxurious hair could be styled. As Alex was eating his food, a voice from somewhere in the back of his mind kept warning him that something was extremely wrong. The longer he sat there eating, still wearing the nightgown, the less influence the voice had. When Alex had finished his meal, he picked up the uniform lying on the bottom shelf of the cart. He held it up before him and stared in disbelief at the denim dress with which they had provided him. For a full hour, he stood there looking back and forth from the dress to the tattered clothes he had been wearing. As he was about to place the dress back on the cart, he glanced over at the holovision. He watched in fascination as a woman demonstrated how to zip up a dress without damaging a manicure. Alex stared intently at the holovision while the woman put on one style of dress after another. Without thinking, Alex set the dress down while he slipped out of the nightgown and changed panties. It took Alex a couple tries to get the dress zipped up the back but he was finally successful. The dress was sleeveless with a skirt that fell just fell loosely several inches below the hips. Also on the cart was a slender pair of flat-healed sandals that fastened around the ankle. Alex had only to think about how cold the floor was before he sat and put on the sandals. He thought again that this was only a temporary arrangement until he was back on the streets. Alex stared blankly at the mirror without recognition at the slender woman who stood before him on the other side of the bars. He felt detached from himself without any real cognition of what was happening. The little voice that had been warning him earlier was now very distant, nearly inaudible. The mind numbing realization of what appeared to be happening washed over Alex in a flood of self-pity. A half hour later, Larissa glanced over to see what was showing on the holovision. She sat there intently watching two one-hour long soap operas showing the difficulties experienced by women who just got out of prison. As the second soap opera finished, Larissa realized that she had to pee very badly. She walked over, pulled up her dress, and sat down to do her business. Alex shook his head and swore bitterly when the pee sprayed more on his leg than into the toilet. He ego sank two levels deeper than he thought possible when he saw the small hairless penis nestled between two small folds of skin. As depression began to set it, Alex did the only thing he could think of to help take the edge off the situation, sat down and watched the holovision. His curiosity was perked as he watched a woman with beautifully long nails slipping into stockings without damaging them. Alex absently reached down and rubbed his shaven legs, trying to imagine how a silky pair of stockings would feel. He continued his tactile exploration all the way to his feet, at which time he realized that the callous skin on the soles of his feet was gone. This new revelation caused him both joy and concern. On one hand, his socks had regularly gotten stuck on that skin and thus wore out faster. He remembered that he had spent more money on socks than on any other type of clothing. On the other hand, having soft delicate feet just didn't quite seem natural. A full length movie came on the holovision just after Alex finished the third meal. It was a drama about a family being split up by the ravages of a warring society. Larissa found herself relating to the young girl as the plot line progressed. When the young girl died at the end, Larissa cried in sorrow for the terrible loss. Larissa was still crying when the last meal came. The woman who brought the cart spent nearly fifteen minutes consoling her. Finally, however, hunger took control and Alex wondered exactly how he had come to be hugging this sexy woman. He hoped that they were finally recognizing his primary function in life. Food, however, was more important right now so he let her go and began to eat. Alex fell asleep on the floor that night watching another movie. This movie was about a boxer who gets drafted into the war. Alex forced a cheer every time the hero killed one of the enemy soldiers but he somehow felt frightened by all the violence. He forced himself to keep watching, despite the mild fear or the weariness he felt. He woke up to some pain on his chest that he felt when he rolled over. It was considerably easier to manipulate the zipper on the back of the dress this time. He had started to take the dress off when the panel began to recede. In a fit of modesty, Alex quickly pulled the dress back up, causing him to wince from the pain. A girl walked in looking like she had just had her head shaved that morning. Embarrassment held Alex in check as the girl wheeled the cart of food toward him. The girl looked to be no more than 16 so Alex wondered how she had gotten so tall. She looked very lost and frightened. Alex heart melted and he felt a very strong urge to hug and comfort her. "Your name is Larissa, isn't it?" asked the girl bashfully. "Yes, it is," replied Alex before he could stop himself. Alex felt somehow close to this girl though he could not have explained how. He began to feel helpless himself and wished he could be with the other women of the prison instead of in solitary. He started to reprimand himself but suddenly couldn't remember why. After a moment of indecision, Larissa walked over to the bars, reached her hand between them, and tenderly grasped the girls hand. "I'm so glad to meet you, Larissa," said the girl with a lovely smile. "I just arrived today; convicted of petty theft. It was my brother, I swear it was. I'm only seventeen, though, so nobody believed me." "I believe you," comforted Larissa sincerely and squeezed her had gently. "My name is Rebecca," offered the girl enthusiastically. "They told me that you will be my roommate when you get out of solitary. I can't wait. The cell gets so lonely." "I can't wait either," admitted Larissa, pulling her hand back through the bars. "Well, I've probably taken too much time," reflected the girl sheepishly, "but it was wonderful to meet you." "I hope I'll see you again soon," ventured Larissa, beginning to feel a little depressed. The girl left the room after a final smile over her shoulder which Larissa returned. Larissa picked at her meal without any enthusiasm. When she turned toward the holovision, she remembered why she had unzipped her dress. She pulled the dress down and instantly saw the source of the pain. The breasts and nipples had swelled, presumably because of the rough texture of the material. She scolded herself for not wearing a bra and set about correcting that oversight. She went to the sink and washed her breasts with cold water, which seemed to arouse her in some way. She felt a warm feeling deep within her but fought down the urge to indulge herself. She put on the bra and pulled off the old panties. She looked disgustedly at the child-like penis protruding from her vagina. Confusion manifested out of control within her as she tried to remember how it might have gotten there. Alex found himself staring at a tiny, boyish penis sticking perversely out of the folds of a vagina. He was shocked and frightened, but he couldn't comprehend what was happening to him. He realized for the first time that perhaps these women weren't really any taller, that perhaps he was actually shorter. He couldn't believe that this was possible. He couldn't stand to look at the pathetic example of manhood between his legs. He hurriedly put on the fresh panties to hide his extremely wimpy penis. He walked over to the food, realizing how hungry he was, and ate a generous portion that would have made him feel much better if it hadn't been for the constant itching. As he bent to pick up the dress, he saw himself in the mirror. He vision blurred as he frantically searched for any trace of the man he knew that he should be seeing. Larissa shook her head in confusion and found that she was admiring herself in the mirror. She wished that she had bigger breasts but she thought that she was pretty enough otherwise. She glanced over at the holovision and determined that the two women were discussing how to alleviate feminine discomfort. She quickly put her dress back on and listened intently. The rest of the day was spent watching the holovision. Alex woke up the next morning from a dream about the incident that had landed him in prison. The woman he had burglarized and raped had been very pretty and very rich. To Alex's dismay, however, he found that his fantasizing seem to focus on the young officer with the shotgun. He couldn't believe that he was actually having fantasies about a man but none-the-less needed to address the sexual tension had built up inside of him. He reached down to stroke himself but could find nothing between his legs to stroke. He rubbed the partial vagina that had replaced his penis but was not getting enough gratification. While he was rubbing, he felt warm deep inside around the groin but also in the chest area. Desperate for gratification, he pulled the nightgown up further and gently rubbed the breasts that he found there also. Finally, after a while of clumsy masturbation, Larissa finally fell asleep, unrelieved. For the next two days, meals and holovision programs came and went for Larissa in a constant stream. The servers lingered to talk to her which helped to alleviate some of her loneliness. She looked in the mirror in between programs because it seemed to her that her appearance was gradually changing. She liked what she saw but it caused her more-than-a-little confusion. Larissa didn't know how long she had been in solitary but it seemed like forever. She began to pray that she would soon be taken out of solitary confinement. She began to long for companionship, but most of all, she wanted someone to talk to. She could sense a vague memory in the back of her mind that she hadn't always been like this but she didn't understand it and couldn't clearly envision it. She had just finished eating as much as she could of the first meal that day when she heard a man's voice outside the heavy wooden door. She never looked out that door anymore because she only ever saw darkness anyway. The voice was stern and commanding, yet somehow stirred something inside her. Her confusion didn't last very long, however, and soon she had collected her scattered wits. "Alex?" said a voice from the hallway outside the door. Larissa jumped out of her skin, partly due to the suddenness of the deep booming voice and partly because of the eerie reverberation in her cell. She caught her breath and stood to confront whoever was out in the hallway. Unconsciously, she smoothed the skirt of her dress and glanced down at her legs to make sure she had shaven that morning. "Larissa?" asked the same voice that had just spoken. "Of course I'm here," scolded Larissa, "and you just scared me nearly to death." "Sorry," apologized the voice from the hallway. "We are coming in now Larissa," advised another male voice, "please stand clear of the door." Larissa was already clear of the door but she took a few steps back anyway. She had not idea what to expect. She inwardly hoped beyond hope that these men were here to take her out of solitary. She gingerly clasped her hands in front of her and waited to see what would happen. Two men walked into the cell, both wearing pistols at their sides in prison guard uniforms. Larissa thought that the second man to enter was incredibly handsome. This thought brought back a little of the confusion she had just dispelled but she ignored it. The guards led her down the hall, one in front of her and one behind her. As they walked, she became aware that the guard behind her was staring at her. The guards delivered her into the hands of a doctor that she felt that she should recognize. Again the confusion welled up inside of her and again she pushed it down. The doctor put her in a chair and strapped her wrists, elbows, and shoulders to the chair. Larissa was more than a little concerned by this but she kept quiet, not wanting expose herself while in such a compromising position. The doctor walked around the chair and held a picture of a tall handsome man close enough for her to see it. "Do you recognize this man, Larissa?" he inquired. The confusion that she had been pushing down surged up anew and she felt as if she was about to lose control of herself. She was very slow to answer as a flood of memories washed over her, scaring her with vivid images of inconceivable atrocities. With great effort, she pushed the memories aside and focused again on the picture. "He looks familiar to me but I... I can't be sure," stammered Larissa. She didn't like the way the doctor smiled but was in no position to do anything about it. More straps were fastened around her head and chin, waist, knees, and ankles, leaving her completely immobilized. The doctor came around in front of her wearing plastic gloves and carrying some sort of ointment. Without explanation, he rubbed the ointment around the outside of her eyes. She blinked her eyes a couple times to adjust to the strange feeling she felt. Her eyes stopped responding mid blink and she found that she couldn't open them again. "I'm going to show you a little movie now that you absolutely must see," explained the doctor as he pulled her eyes open. Now that they were open, she found that she couldn't close them. Her eyes began to water causing a slow trickle of tears to run down her cheeks. She struggled against her bondage helplessly for a moment before giving up completely. She got the feeling that she wasn't going to like what ever it was that he was about to show her. In the few minutes it took to start the movie, her eyes had begun to feel dry and itchy. The movie came on, and she saw the man from the photograph run into a room. She remembered this room but was sure that SHE had never seen it before. The man grabbed the woman by the hair and ripped off her blouse with one swipe of his strong arm. That man was her, she realized with utter repulsion of the memories that she could no longer control. She felt like a man and a woman all at the same time. She watched the man rape several women in different places and knew instinctively that she had done that, but worse, that she had enjoyed it. As she saw it this time, however, she felt akin to the women that were being brutalized, and it scared her to think of what she had done. In the last scene, she watched in abject terror as the man that she once had been mercilessly performed his sadistic abusive art on her. She could almost feel it every time he hit her but she was unable to look away. When the movie was finally over, nearly an hour later, Larissa felt humiliated, alone, and violated, as if she had really been raped. Her eyes had gone completely dry during the movie because she hadn't been able even to blink. Now, however, her eyes were overflowing with tears, for herself and all the women that she had once hurt. Unable to assimilate the emotional overload all at once, she fell into a state of depression. A part of her died that day, the part that had once been so malevolent, and she knew somehow that she had killed it, strictly out of self preservation. It took nearly a month for Rebecca to pull Larissa out of her depression. Although the events of the past were etched into the front of her brain forever, she too had been violated by what she had been. Forgiveness came slowly but she did forgive herself, knowing that she didn't really own that part of her past. Finally, she started meeting people and learning how to live her new life. Rebecca was Larissa's salvation through it all though she never told her anything before she had 'found' herself. Rebecca became her best friend, and she found that they shared much in common. Larissa quickly learned the rules of prison life and abided by them, having had her fill of being tormented that one fateful day when she was released from solitary. Her remaining five and a half months were not very difficult, since it was an unspoken rule not to ask about anyone's past. Larissa learned many things about prison life that convinced her that she didn't want to return. One thing that she found very interesting was the symbol of status recognition within the prison structure. When the women first arrive at the prison, their heads are shaven, and that is the last hair-cut they are allowed. It is thus strictly observed by all, inmates and employees alike, that women with longer hair rank higher within the system than those with shorter hair. Neither Larissa nor Rebecca ever made it very high up the ranks of that little Stockdale society Rebecca and Larissa were released to the mid-house at the same time on an early release plan, and got to share a room there as well. They were given a week of free room and board until they would be charged $200 a month rent. All inmates were given $1000 dollars and two new outfits upon their release to help them get started. Larissa was also provided with a new ID tag and updated birth certificate, identifying her as Larissa S. Cissel. More than anything else she had received, however, she had been given a fresh start and she was determined to make it work. The first thing she did, though, was to go to the local solon and get a manicure and a pedicure, complete with a pretty shade of velvet nail polish. During the week in the mid-house, Larissa sat through 73 interviews and was getting very discouraged. She only had two more interviews lined up, leaving her frightened that she would fail. The interview that she was currently waiting for was for the position of administrative assistant. Larissa couldn't call upon her college degree since that was a lifetime ago and didn't really belong to her anymore, so she was trying for anything she could get until she could replace her education. The interview lasted longer than what she expected, so she was anxious about missing the shuttle. The wait was worth it, however, because she was offered a job earning enough to support her, and Rebecca too if her friend hadn't found a job by the end of the week. Once everything was concluded, she ran down the steps, checking her skirt as she went, hoping that the shuttle would be late too. Larissa ran up to the shuttle stop just on time to see it taking off. Since the mid-house was only a mile or so from the shuttle stop, she started walking. The shoes that she had received from the prison were great for interviews but were definitely not meant for walking substantial distances. She remembered that she once loved the look of these shoes, and still did she supposed, but at that moment she would have liked to strangle whoever designed them. The hair on the back of her neck prickled, yanking her from her reverie, as she realized that she was walking down a dark, deserted street across a dark alley. How many times has she, as a man, hidden in just such an alley waiting for an unwary woman to walk by. She heard a thud from somewhere in the darkness and stifled a shriek before the cat ran up to her begging for food. Relieved, she pulled out a strip of dried beef from a bag in her purse and gave it to the grateful cat. She sighed, but was still quite anxious, and hurried her steps as much as she could without risking tripping or twisting an ankle. She heard footsteps behind her and had to fight down the urge to start running. A moment later, a very muscular man standing about 6' 1" walked by her without a word. She was about to count herself lucky when she noticed another man watching her from the shadows across the street. He whistled at her, adding insult to injury, but she didn't dare confront him. The whole rest of the journey, she was constantly looking over her shoulder and avoiding shadows and allies. When Larissa finally walked into the mid-house, she happened upon Headwife Ashley and wanted to hug her just for being there. The headwife knew of her past too so she told the tale of the harrowing experience of her trip back, as they related to her detached memories. When she had finished, the headwife hugged her for comfort, congratulated her on her success, and left for her office. Larissa was greeted with a big worried hug from Rebecca, and felt obligated to relive the experience with her second retelling. The headwife sat down at the desk in her office and pulled out Larissa's file. Over the next half an hour, she updated the file, compete with the experience after the interview. It was getting late so the headwife put the file away and went to bed. Two days later, when Larissa and Rebecca left for their new apartment, their files were sent down to public records for filing. A month later, the bailiff set a folder down on the judges desk and walked out of her office. The judge ope