SKIN DEEP - Urban Legend
Chapter One: In The Beginning
By Mark McDonald
Journal: Journal Date: 12/19/2081 -- 4:22 P.M.
Journal: Journal Empty!
Journal: Voice dictation journal editor, open.
Proceed!
"Sigh!"
"I've been sitting here trying to figure out where to
start, my journal screen just sitting there in front of me,
open, like a gaping, empty mouth waiting to swallow me. So
where do I begin with this? How do I say what I have to
say?"
Journal: Voice dictation journal editor, ERROR.
"What now?" Smack. "Come on!"
Grrrrzzzits.
Journal: Voice dictation journal editor, ERROR.
"Shit!" Bang.
Brrzzzzt!
"Piece of garage!"
Journal: Voice dictation journal editor, open.
Proceed.
"There! That's better."
"Okay, let's try this. I was born Michael William Vello on
November 15th, in the year 2062. Therefore, by easy
addition, that means I'm 20 years old, or at least I have
seen twenty years pass in my short lifetime. Ten months
ago, when this whole thing started, I was still nineteen
and a freshman in college."
There! That wasn't so hard! What's next? Let me see. Oh
yeah! How could I forget?
I had been in school about three months at the time my
little unfinished journey began, having moved out of my
parents modest home, which had been made to be slightly
more spacious by the death of older sister, Erin, about two
years earlier. Until then, our lives had been about as
normal as one can expect since the war and all the
shortages and rationing started, but all that happened
before I was born, so I really don't remember anything
else. For me, life has always been about shortages. Others
have it so much worse. I really have to remember that,
especially now!
Anyway, what was I saying? Oh yeah, life was about as
normal for our family as it was for most others. My Mom and
Dad had grown up before the shortages and explosive
population growth and remember a much different existence.
From what they've told me, it must have been a very opulent
time; things like beef and other meats available at anytime
without any rationing, grains and bread on open shelves in
the grocery store and the freedom to pick and choose what
kind of cheese or bread you bought. Yeah, yeah, I know what
you're going to say; those types of choices still exist,
but as I'm sure you're already aware, they only exist for
the very rich or privileged in our society. Most of us
don't have any clue about the comfort that these choices
can provide.
Normal life for our small quartet ended with the death of
my sister in the summer of 2079 in a HOV accident. The
driver lost control, ended up trying to hover over water
and sunk like a rock. After that my parents, caught in wave
after wave of grief, made life unbearable for not only
themselves but for anyone who came within a thousand yards
of them. Please don't get me wrong. I loved my sister very
much. We were very close and I was devastated the night she
was killed. I lost my only true loving family member. Yes,
Mom and Dad loved me, but Erin was the "special one," the
"favorite son" -- or daughter in this case. I don't resent
anyone for this. In fact, I understand it -- and on the
night she died, we had shared some of the most profound
moments we had ever shared as brother and sister -- but
after two years, the pain of loss diminishes and one finds
it's time to move on. I'm sure my sister wouldn't have
minded.
My parents, on the other hand, wanted to wallow in the
depths of their despair as though it were a warm bath to be
enjoyed at the end of a hard day's work. I guess it's hard
to betray the memory of a child, your child, by admitting
that it's time to move on without them. I can see how some
could view that as a sort of perverse abandonment and I
don't think they ever forgave me for what I decided to do
next. I left!
I had graduated from high school in that two-year period
after my sister's death and was ready to make a life for
myself. I felt that the best way to honor Erin's life was
not to defile my own.
It was clear that my parents weren't going to help send me
to school, so I self-qualified for several grants and
scholarships. Then, I applied for on campus living quarters
and bodda-bing, bodda-boom, I'm attending City College. I
started during the winter semester and lived in a small
single room in the men's dorm two blocks away from the main
campus. It's sometimes hard to believe that moving out and
starting school all happened less than a year and a half
ago. Then, after what seemed a quantum leap later with a
little poor judgment thrown in for good measure, here I am
-- but I'm getting ahead of myself.
God, has it really been that long now? I guess it has. I
still remember the date. How could I not? For me, it's
kinda like remembering what you were doing when the first
colonial ships landed on Mars or where you were and what
you were doing as you watched President Houston commit
suicide on a national VID broadcast. My moment of infamy
was March 4th, 2081. The night before all this started, I
had been hanging out at a local club where my band was
currently playing sold-out shows four nights a week,
Thursday through Sunday. As luck would have it, Gary knew
just where I could be found that Monday night.
The place was nearly empty Monday to Wednesday since the
band didn't play those nights and Marcus, the owner, didn't
have and one else playing to fill in the gap. The place
held about two hundred people comfortably, but on Friday
and Saturday, it was common to find as many as five hundred
or more crammed in to hear the band. Monday, Marcus was
lucky if forty people showed up all night let alone at one
time. This made it easy to spot me at the bar. My attention
was diverted from my drink to the door when it opened. In
walked Gary, a huge plastic looking smile on his face. I
couldn't help thinking to myself that Gary had found some
new thing to fill that "Danger Niche."
"Yo!" Gary shouted from across the room. I raised my hand
and smiled to him.
"Hap?" I asked.
"Nada. You?" He gripped my hand, squeezing it hard. Then,
he gave it a couple of good pumps before letting it go.
"Drinkn' for free," I said and lifted my glass to him.
"Marcus. One of those for me and put it on his tab," Gary
said with a smile.
"You pay for your drinks Shipley," he growled with a huge
grin as he set the glass down. "Besides I know you can
afford it."
"Aw, Marcus. I'm truly hurt. You know this man here
wouldn't be earning you so much money if it wasn't for me."
"Bullshit!" he responded, but made no move to leave, as if
expecting the rest of the explanation.
"Truly." Gary sipped his Water Ale. I raised my eyebrows
and looked at Gary, also waiting for an answer.
"Why, I was the one that recognized all that talent in this
tall, lanky, useless pole of flesh," he said with a grin. I
rolled my eyes and went back to nursing my drink.
"I thought it was his sister that found out about this fine
man's particular talent," Marcus asked and leaned in to
Gary.
"Yeah, that is the popular rumor, but what you don't know
is that I'm the one that told her. Knowing of her immense
talent in the musical field, I was led to the decision that
she would be the best to handle his burgeoning career. I
was merely acting in the capacity of a -- oh let's say -- a
talent scout," Gary finished and took another sip of his
drink.
"Talent scout," Marcus snorted, then looked at me for
confirmation. I nodded ruefully and he said, "Bullshit
artist, more like it. That will be six bucks, Shipley, cash
or chip?"
Gary glowered at Marcus with a mock-surprised look on his
face, then cracked a smile and produced a transaction chip
from his wrist clip.
"Thank you Mister Shipley, your chip has been debited six
dollars. Would you like to tip your server?" Marcus asked
with a genuine smile.
"Sure," Gary said. Marcus was about to debit the chip again
when Gary said, "Don't stroke yourself on roadside during
rush hour. You'll get arrested."
Marcus' face clouded over. He turned and tossed the chip
back to Gary, then stormed off to tend to more generous
customers.
"Thanks asshole!" Gary muttered beneath his breath.
"You know, if you'd stop prodding him, he would probably
buy you a drink from time to time, just because he knows
you're my friend," I observed with my head still facing my
drink.
"There's no fun in that. Besides, he likes it. We wouldn't
be friends without that lively exchange. He'd think I was
useless and no-account."
"Gary, he thinks that now," I laughed.
"Yeah well, fuck him if he can't take a joke."
"So what's up Gary?"
"Huh? What do you mean?" he said trying to look surprised
and innocent at the same time.
`You're busted' I thought to myself. I turned around on my
bar stool and faced the nearly empty room.
"You mean you came all the way down to the campus bar just
to..." I waved my hand at the room, "enjoy all the night
life? You? Mister excitement?"
"I can't come down and see how my best bud is doing? Mikey,
now I really am hurt." He had been looking at me but now
turned away and acted as if he were pouting. That only made
me laugh.
"Okay, Good to see you then," I said chuckling. "I was
about to go get something to eat, want to join me?"
"Naw, I'm eating down at my folks' place tonight, helping
out some later, but thanks."
We sat in stony silence for some time. His silence was
uneasy, but I couldn't figure out a way to get the truth
out of him, so I finally said, "Well, enough for me. I'm
hungry. Sure you won't join me?"
"For cold pizza or fish and chips? Ah... thanks but no
thanks. You know I can't eat that crap and you shouldn't
either. It will gum up your insides."
"My parents don't own a four-star restaurant and I'm poor,
remember?" He blushed and I silently kicked myself for
being such a jerk. Then I said, "Well, if you change your
mind, it sounds like you know where to find me. See ya."
I turned and called to Marcus, waving. "Hey pal, see you
Thursday, Okay?" Marcus waved and smiled in return.
Then, I slapped Gary on the shoulder and made for the door,
glancing behind me just a little to see when Gary got up to
follow me. It took longer than I though it would. I had
just about decided that I'd been wrong about him this time.
Maybe he had just wanted some company after all. I was
about to turn around and head back to the bar when I head
the door crashed open and someone come running in my
direction.
"Hey Mikey, wait up!"
I pulled up and waited, "You change your mind about
dinner?"
Ignoring my statement he proceeded with his own question,
puffing a bit as he did, "Ah... listen... I was ah...
wondering..."
"Yes?"
"I was wondering if maybe a few of us could meet at your
dorm room tomorrow night?"
"Why my room?"
"Ah," he started looking a bit confused. "It's...
convenient," he answered smiling, obviously proud of
himself.
"And what are we doing?"
"Oh no, no, NO. Not we... everyone that's going is already
on board. I just thought that it would be a good place for
us to meet before we moved on to the evening's
excitements."
"Oh, I see. Well then, what are you doing?" an old thorn
began jabbing me in my side. I wasn't sure I really wanted
to hear the rest.
"Look I can't really talk about it here. It's, kind of
covert," he whispered with a sly smile. "But we're gonna
miss you on this one Mikey."
I raised my eyebrows at that. I was being excluded from one
of Gary's excursions. In advance, I was being excluded.
"Am I going to get into any trouble letting you meet
there?" I asked.
"Mikey, when have I ever placed you at any risk?"
I shrugged at the comment. "So, you don't want me along, is
that it?" I was as surprised by the comment as he appeared
to be.
"This is a one-night adventure for six people. You've never
wanted to go in the past; we just all assumed that you
wouldn't want to this time either. The boat's full, sorry."
I guess I was visibly surprised, because Gary continued
with his apologies in rapid succession.
"Jeez. Mikey. I didn't even think you would want to come
along, After all the times you just 'bowed out' as you like
to say." He rubbed his blonde hair back with one hand in a
fretful gesture. "Man, I don't know what to say, except I'm
sorry."
Hurt, but not wanting to it to show I said, "It's Okay." I
meant 'It's Okay,' but remember, I said that as if it had
been one word. "We'll, you're probably right." Then, to
prove I was not hurt, I consented. "Sure you guys can meet
there. What time? I'll need to be there to let you in."
This was the first time since I had come to know Gary that
I could remember that I had been deliberately excluded from
one of his "adventures." I was surprised again that I felt
on top of the jealously I usually felt at his daring,
instead feeling the slightest bit of pain at having been
rejected as a choice for the first time. I shivered. The
winds of change were blowing in my life again. Gary, my
childhood friend was moving on, and I guess so was I. With
the band's popularity, or my studies in school, it would
only be a matter of time before we went our separate ways,
but it still made me sad to think that this chapter of my
life was coming to a conclusion. That's the way it happens
though isn't it? When you least expect it, your life
changes forever. Rarely is there a way to ever go back.
"Right. Six sound Okay?"
"That's Polar. Class is over around three-thirty so I can
be there whenever."
"Kewl." Gary said and then stopped. "Say, are you Okay?"
"Yeah, I'm great, why?"
"Okay, if you're sure?"
"Why wouldn't I be Gary?"
He waved it off and said, "Never mind. See you at around
six tomorrow."
"See ya," I said. Gary turned and made his way down the
street in the opposite direction from my place.
I wondered what he meant by "covert" and shivered again. I
had the deepest dread that tomorrow might be the last time
I ever saw Gary again. The thought put me in the doldrums
as I went about the rest of the evening. That night was
entirely uneventful. So much so, I don't much remember what
happened following my meeting with Gary. I do remember that
fish and chips sounded rather good and I got an order on my
way home.
-*-
The next day I dressed, went to class, came home and
waited. I spent the time between studying and doing my
"good boy never does bad" routine of homework and checkbook
balancing. I remember thinking that I had to get my latest
grant installment deposited to the bank as soon as I could.
It sometimes amazed me that cash was still being used, but
I guess you can count on the government for a few
constants.
At around five forty-five Norman and Frank, two close
mutual friends of Gary and I showed up. With my schedule in
the band, there hadn't been much time for all of us to get
together and shoot the bull in quite a while. I was stung
again by the fact that I hadn't been asked to join in. What
the hell did they think I was, a coward?
"What's up gentlemen?" I asked, shaking hands as they
entered.
They mumbled their greetings and shook my hand in return,
each one coming in and finding a place to sit in the small,
overstuffed room that was my one-room dorm. I felt
uncomfortable; there was no conversation from these two old
friends. We sat down and stared at each other.
"Well, it's been a while hasn't it?" I started, trying to
break the ice.
"Yeah!" and "Hell yeah," were the responses I got followed
by "Long time..." and "Hell yeah, too long..." then
silence. I looked from one to the other and back several
times. "Damn, you boys talk too much!"
Norman laughed nervously. "Come on... what's going on
tonight? Frank, what is it that Gary feels I'm not..."
someone knocked on the door and you could see the look of
relief on Frank's face, the look of a boxer about to be
counted out as the bell rang.
"Door's open," I shouted and I got up to greet whoever came
in, then looked at Frank and added, "We're not done."
The door opened and Kit oozed into the room. I liked Kit.
He always seemed so smooth. Many people around campus
considered him odd. He was quiet until you got to know him.
He never put himself forward for comment unless asked. When
in social situations he usually just sat and quietly
listened to the various conversations going on around him.
He was not a dater. He had an occasional steady girl he
would see for a while but so far nothing too serious. He
seemed to glide when he walked.
I read an old book written some time ago by a lady named
Anne Rice. It was about a vampire named Louis. This vampire
could move fluidly from one place to the next, seemingly
without really moving his legs or feet. The way Louis moved
in that book reminded me a lot of the way Kit moved. I
found Kit thoughtful. He didn't speak often, but when he
did you had better listen. It was usually important. He was
perhaps the best straight man I knew.
"Hey, Kit! How are you pal?" His eyes had a slight glassy
look to them. "Feelin' no pain I see." He said nothing,
just stuck out his hand and shook mine, grinned and moseyed
off to the corner of the room to start listening.
Of the three now present, Norman the one we all most
worried about. In fact, there was some question as to
whether or not he was actually mentally impaired in
someway. He very often forgot where he was even when
traveling with a group or in a clearly marked area or well-
known place. At times like these, he seemed at a loss for
where to get a clue. He quite often said things that were
inappropriate, as if he had no idea who was listening or
that the company he was keeping at that time might be
offended by what he had just said. He had a heart of gold
and would never hurt anyone. He just wasn't the sharpest
knife in the drawer. In fact, he was more of a spoon.
It was this one unchecked element that let me know what was
going on just as Gary and Rod arrived at the dorm building.
Norman said, "So does anyone know if Rod is bringing the
skins here or what?"
I was absolutely floored. Skins! What the hell could Gary
be thinking?
I looked around the room to gage the reaction of the others
at the news that tonight's little adventure involved what I
considered something more than just risky. Most of them
just looked at the floor or at the ceiling, anything but
look me in the eyes. I did catch Frank roll his eyes at
Norm. Everyone already knew.
I verbally leaped on Norm, "Hey, what the hell is this
about skins, Norm? Gary didn't say anything about that to
me!" Then to all of them I asked, "How many of you knew
about this before you got here?"
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I knew the answer but I needed the
admission from all of them. My brow scowled at them all.
They were not impressed.
One by one, they all started counting off. Kit raised his
hand, then Frank. Even Norman raised his hand, looked
around and realized I already knew he knew and slowly
lowered it again.
"Goddamn, guys I know you've all heard the stories. You
can't think this shit is Okay," I declared.
I was incredulous, but no one said anything; they just
stared at me with wide eyes and blank faces as if to say
Yeah, So?
I could not believe these guys were actually thinking of
going off and doing something as stupid as trying on skins.
I had heard some really ugly things about these devises.
I'm sure most of them were urban legends; even so, some are
really scary. Like the twenty-five year old guy that
programmed a four-day lockout to a skin only to find out
once he got it on that it was the skin of a very old man.
He had a heart attack trying to get it back off and died in
the skin. Shit like that really nerved me out.
What few so-called facts I did know, I felt relatively
certain were true. These were used for subversive
operations by the government. Why? The reason for that was
simple, they made perfect disguises.
I had learned that originally, a genetics company in New
York City had developed them for commercial use. The idea
was to give those of the general population who were
unhappy with their looks and opportunity to change their
looks without surgery. The skins genetically modified a
person's own structure to reform him or her into the shape
of the person the skin was designed to emulate. More to the
point, you literally became the person the skin was
programmed to make you. If you got a woman pregnant while
wearing a skin, the baby would have the genetic traits of
the person you were when you had the skin on. Surgery or
operations could not detect the use of a skin nor could
such a procedure be used to remove or deactivate a skin.
In fact, another one of those urban legends is of a US
agent shot in the line duty while wearing a skin. In order
to save his life the surgeons removed a kidney. After he
had recovered, the agent in charge of his case had him
shipped home. When the time came to have the skin
deactivated, they discovered that, by removing his kidney,
they had changed the algorithm used to store his original
information and the skin could not be deactivated.
This was some serious shit! It was just the idea of the
possibility that gave me the willies.
Frank reached over, popped Norman in the back of the head
with an open hand and scolded him, "Good going Norm, you
limp noodle!"
"How the hell was I supposed to know Mikey didn't know?
It's not like he wouldn't find out," Norman defended
himself.
"Find out?" I was confused. If they had all left without
saying anything, how the hell would I have found out?
Outside a van pulled up. Doors slammed and I could hear
Gary and Rod laughing to each other. It was a laugh that
was too loud and strong. I could tell Gary was nervous.
"Good, Gary's here," said Frank as he got up and made for
the door.
I made a grab for his sleeve, "Wait a minute, what did
Norman mean when..."
"The door man, I'm gonna get the door!" Frank tied to pull
away but I had a grip on his sleeve.
Don't worry about the door, I'll get it you just tell
me..."
There was a knock on the door. Before I could answer it,
the door burst open and in walked Gary and Rod. Gary was
holding a small cardboard box under one arm. It appeared to
be damp in a few places. Steam appeared to be coming from
inside. As Gary crossed the tiny room, the faces of the
others in the room lit up like light bulbs. Hands were
stretched out in greeting and shaken. Rod followed close
behind. The scene reminded me of a politician stumping a
crowd for votes, and this small crowd loved him for it.
Gary locked eyes with me and saw right away there was
trouble with his plan. He glanced over his shoulder at the
others, I guess to see who had betrayed him. Just past him,
I saw Norm drop his head and blush.
He never skipped a beat. When he reached me, I grabbed him
by the forearm and escorted him roughly to the far side of
the room where my kitchenette was, smiling and making small
talk the whole way. The kitchenette was the only place
where we might be able to get just a little privacy. I
didn't want to make him look stupid in front of everyone
else.
"What the fuck are you thinking Shipley? Goddamned skins?"
I whispered, starting in on him as soon as we were both out
of earshot, which was hard in my little sub-divided room.
He didn't say a word. Instead, he shoved the box he was
carrying in to my arms. It was much heavier than it looked.
The damp spots were in fact damp spots, but the steam
coming from the box was not because the contents were hot.
"What's this?" I asked harshly. I didn't want the edge in
my attitude to be dulled by his lame peace offering.
"Open it up and see," was all he said.
I peeled back the corner of the box and inside I could see
the red and white markings of a six-pack of Stromsburg
Beer. This was real beer, from a Pittsburgh microbrewery.
"Where did you get this?" I asked in wonderment. The edge
in my voice, I wanted so desperately to preserve, was now
as dull as a creek stone.
"The folks have a couple of restaurants, remember? How do
you think I was able to get you those beers on your
birthday?" he smiled his biggest, `you're my best buddy'
grins at me.
"But this is a whole six pack Gary, your folks are gonna'
know. This shit ain't cheep, son - - and you still live at
home. I can't accept it," I told him, but made no offer to
hand it back.
"Yeah you can, besides if you work with us tonight, you
will have earned it. So it really isn't a gift."
"Work with you?" I thought for a second and then it came to
me. "Duh! It's a bribe!" I was the sixth person; I had been
all along. He knew if he put me in a position where I had
to back out in front of all my friends, I was less likely
to do it. "Holy shit Gary, do you know what..."
"Mikey, I'm hurt! I wouldn't do anything to you that would
require bribing you. That would suggest that I would
knowingly put my best bud in danger." He gave me what
looked to be a genuine look of personal pain in his eyes.
Ole stupid me, I fell for it!
"I'm sorry, Gary. I know you wouldn't do anything
deliberately. I didn't mean that. It's just..."
"Great, then have one of those beers and let's get back in
with the rest of the guys."
I stood there wondering how the hell he had just done that.
He had defused the entire issue before I could even make a
single objection. I didn't even know how to approach the
subject again without looking like a coward in front of
everyone. Back in the other room, Rod was explaining that
the skins were at the warehouse. He hadn't taken any to
bring to us because the place had been crawling with people
during the day, but, he said, he had an unsupervised entry
code that would prevent flagging at the security station.
He and his buddies programmed it to use when shipments of
booze or other useful and marketable items came into the
bonded area of the warehouse.
I stood listening to Rod, sipping my beer, waiting to find
a mistake or a flaw in his plan. Hell, there were many I
could have tried to exploit into a reason we should not do
this, but I needed one that no one would or could counter
with a better reason why we should do this. None presented
themselves.
I offered a beer to those standing around listening. Only
Norman took one, which I thought was strange. The fact that
no one else took one left me feeling a bit uneasy, as
though they had all been told not to tamper with Mikey's
bribe. Only Norm was too stupid to remember to turn it down
if he was offered one.
The shipment had come in a week ago and was now sitting
unattended and unknown to others in the bonded area. An
area that was supposedly protected from prying eyes and
available only to special warehouse workers and government
inspectors. According to Rod, there were hundreds of boxes
with at least six skins per box.
Rod was saying that we would have to go now if we were
going to do this. So, we silently piled into his van, which
was a solid-paneled job, used mostly for deliveries. It was
very utilitarian in appearance. Inside, there were
discarded boxes and papers everywhere. The five of us
scooted boxes and trash around until we were able to clear
a small space of van flooring to sit on and made ourselves
as comfortable as possible. Rod cranked up the hover jets
and we took off for the harbor.
So that was it. I had been tricked into going on one of
Gary's adventures. Gary had been right. I hadn't wanted to
go with them that night. I was a bit put off by not being
asked to go, but, if I had been asked, I would have turned
him down. So in the end, he put me in a situation he felt I
wouldn't make too much of scene over and thereby be forced
to go. As we sped along to the warehouse, all I could think
of were the people that would most want to protect these
things from popular public knowledge. Skins, according to
the government, didn't exist, but neither did the ruins on
Mars. The Military had landed on Mars in 2010 and from the
reports, if they are to be believed, the ruins were found
two years later. However, it wasn't until commercial
tankers and civilians started landing there that the
evidence could no longer be hidden. Until then, they had
been an urban legend just like skins are now.
The government's hard line on this was due primarily to
it's own involvement in the use of these devices. As I
found out later, this or any government that had this
technology, could program these things to emulate anyone,
infiltrate the highest levels of any bureaucracy and take
it over from the inside out. Not only did our government
want to keep the technology with in our borders, it wanted
to use it before it was used against it. They also wanted
to be the ones to defeat this technology before it got away
from them, as all significant technologies do eventually.
Nevertheless, others felt they had a stake in the skins as
well. The mob had financial designs on these things. It was
rumored that a white male skin at age 18 to 25 went on the
black market for anywhere from $500,000 to $1,000,000 cash
no questions asked.
Male and female skins were used for any number of reasons.
I read in the months since that some people use skins to
change their race from an undesired or oppressed one to a
race that is more widely accepted. Older people had been
rumored to use them as a one-time fountain of youth. Men
that wanted to be women, women that wanted to be men the,
the ugly that wanted to be beautiful, it seemed the
combinations were as limitless as the imaginations of those
who wanted to use them. Then, there were the rich who used
them temporarily as elaborate costumes. Skins could be the
complete and total package in escapism. Again, however,
urban legends abound surrounding this group of losers.
Here's a group of people that could have, potentially,
anything they wanted and they decide they want the
flexibility to be someone else for a limited amount of
time. Their wealth and affluence spawned a certain
arrogance that falsely led them to believe that all is at
the mercy of their control because of who they were and, of
course, what they possess. Yet here too there are tales of
poor unfortunate souls that lost their money and power
because the skins failed and they could no longer prove
their identities.
However, the tale that bothers me the most is the one about
the couple that wanted to live for one weekend as each
other. They found a genetics smith to fashion two skins
with their genetic codes imbedded in the chips. When
activated, they had, essentially, switched places. At the
end of the weekend fantasy, however, only one skin could be
removed. The husband's, now the wife-imposter's, skin
stubbornly refused to be deactivated. To the horror of the
couple, they found that they were now, no longer husband
and wife but twin sisters, forever. They couldn't even get
the genetics engineer to reproduce the husband's skin for
the true wife to use because his genetic pattern was lost
the minute the skin he wore failed.
He had controlled all the business ventures and money, and
most of the assets were mired in extensive partnerships.
They lost everything. What's worse, they were both
eventually brought under suspicion of murder. Both were too
afraid of the consequences of their use of skins to admit
that the husband had not died but was now trapped and
living as his own wife. Devastated by what had happened to
them as a couple by the loss of position, influence, money,
you name it; the original wife is reported to have hung
herself, leaving the former husband alone, trapped in the
form of the woman he once loved. These were the thoughts
that were running through my mind as we drove. I was a
little more than nervous. If the boxes really contained
skins, then it was reasonable to assume they were
Government Issue. And if they were, then the Government
would be watching. The closer we got to the warehouse the
more nervous I became. The beer I had drunk was making my
head buzz but not enough to dispel my fear. I remember
thinking that didn't want to do this any more. Jesus
Christ, I was scared!
The hover-van stopped. Outside I could hear voices. We must
be at the security gate. There was an electronic buzzing
and the sound of something metallic being moved out of the
way -- the gate I supposed -- then we were moving again. We
didn't go far. The HOV stopped again and this time, after
hearing Rod and Norm crunch around on the ground, the doors
of the van were thrown wide. Harsh overhead streetlights
shone in on us and one by one we each popped our heads out
to look around.
We were at the edge of the bay, on the opposite side of it
from the college campus. A huge empty dock lay just to the
right of where the van was stationed. Beyond that, the
harbor curved around to the place we had just come from.
The City College lights were visible in the darkness; they
rippled off the water in a cascade of ever changing
patterns. Beyond the college on the waterfront would be the
dorm building; it would be close enough to walk to. It
might take a couple of hours but it was still close enough
that it could be done.
On the other side of us was the warehouse. It was an
enormous thing, with two huge hanger-like doors that met in
the middle, easily large enough to accommodate a sizable
commercial aircraft or shuttle. The building was devoid of
windows; there was only strong metal siding everywhere I
looked. The building looked very secure. I was beginning to
hope that perhaps we wouldn't be able to get inside.
My hopes were dashed almost immediately as I saw Rod walk
toward a small door near the right corner of the structure.
There was a small keypad by the door and Rod was punching
in numbers. When he was finished, there was a click and the
door opened just slightly.
Gary was standing directly behind me. My nerves were
practically singing, so when Gary surprised me by touching
me on the arm, I farted on him.
Burrrraaaapppppp!
"God Damn Mikey," he exclaimed waiving his hand in front of
his face, "awwwww, shit that's nasty." Then he said, "Here,
this is for you fuck face!" and he let his fist come down
on the top of my head like a hammer.
BOINK.
It didn't hurt but I was in no mood to be messed with.
"Fuck you! You want to get in there so quickly then move
around from behind me and that won't happen again," I
replied defensively.
He shoved me from behind gently and in I went. The place
was filled with stuff. There were large boxes of glassware
stacked up against one wall where we entered the building
and other household goods boxed up and stacked all around.
Most of the stacks of boxes were too tall to see over. As
we walked, our footsteps echoed off the ceiling, walls and
boxes in the enormous building and the sound bounced
haphazardly back to us.
We walked past racks of men's and women's clothes, high
shelves of what appeared to be hovercraft parts, liquids,
some consumable some not and all sorts of other things. We
passed an opened box of women's panties and Gary grabbed
one. In the next moment, he had stretched them over my head
from behind. I ripped them off, turning around and shooting
Gary an angry glance. I could have kicked his ass and he
knew I was capable of it.
He held up his hands, ginned and said. "Okay, Okay, I'll
back off. Just trying to lighten the mood Mikey ole boy,
that's all." I threw the panties back at him, turned around
and kept marching.
I looked up at the ceiling at one point and noticed long
chains on pulleys attached to long tracks that ran the
length of the building. They were the booms used for
stacking all this stuff so impossibly high!
We stopped and someone suddenly said, "Here, catch!"
Something slapped me in the chest and dropped into my
cradled arms. It was a clear poly-bag with some black
lettering on it:
Genetic Transition Device
Type: Human
Times New Roman
XX-178847-CFA18
Below that, the cellophane had been wrinkled but I could
still make out some of what it had said. It read:
Caution! This Devi T e Used ly B er.
My assumption was that it was meant to read "This Devise To
Be Used Only By Official Personal" or something to that
nature. I couldn't make sense of what I guessed was the
serial number. The "Type: Human" was easy enough to
understand though. At least I wasn't going to end up a
horse, a goat or something like that. Nevertheless, the
thought that someone had to identify if the skin was human
was enough to make a person wonder what those fucks were
doing with this technology.
Rod had finished passing out the skins.
"Okay gentlemen, now the fun begins. There are offices and
restrooms for each of us to change in. No pun intended." No
one laughed. "Once one of has put on a skin the rest of
have to follow suite. If we don't, this thing," Rod held up
what looked like a sophisticated calculator with a number
of buttons and a small display screen. "The patch code
transmitter will not active. That means the poor slobs that
have already put their skins on will have to stay in their
skins until the transmitter is turned on. Do I make myself
clear?"
With that, everyone looked at me. I nodded that I got it.
It meant that I now had to talk everyone out of this or I
was going to have to do this.
"That's it guys. See you back here in few minutes. Don't
forget to wear your name tags when you get back out or no
one will recognize you."
With that, they all started making their way to various
points in the warehouse. I stared down at the package that
Rod had just tossed to me, hating the feel of it. There was
dread in my heart. All I wanted was to just run away, but I
had no real way of stopping the others -- and without me,
they'd be stuck, even if they were stuck because they did
some dumb thing after I told them I wanted out. It would
still be my fault. Therefore, I shuffled off toward the
back of the warehouse.
I found an office that was not occupied by one of the
others and tested the door. It swung open easily so I went
in and closed the door behind me. Opening the package, I
pulled the skin out and held it up to examine it in what
little light there was coming from the warehouse. It was a
gauzy material that felt light and loose in my hands,
although I could feel small wires and hard circuitry
embedded deep inside the fabric. There were no real
features save for a pair of arms, a pair of legs and a
head. In addition, there was an opening in the back; at
least, it looked like the back. I wondered briefly if I
were to put this on backward would I wind up with a nose
and eyes on the back of my head?
Out in the warehouse I heard a voice I didn't recognize. It
had started. If I put this off too much longer, there would
be the devil to pay so I stripped down and stepped into the
outfit. There was no zipper, but I had noticed two small,
flat metal disks at the base of the neck as I was pulling
it over my head. Praying I wasn't making a mistake, I
reached back and placed the to disks together.
The reaction was harsh and immediate. The skin contracted
around me as if a vacuum had been turned on inside. It cut
off all my air. I might have been all right had I thought
to take a breath before the disks clipped together, but I
hadn't. I fought the skin. I tried to grab it with my hands
but it was already too tight. I could feel it getting
tighter, compacting me down. The pain was bad but nothing
like what was coming.
I tried to scream for help, but when I did, it invaded my
open mouth. Something was terribly wrong; I must have
gotten a defective skin. Next, it was stretching down into
my throat. That didn't hurt as much as it scared me to
death. I was going to choke to death before it squashed me
into a small ball of flesh.
However, that was still not the worst. There had been a
tightness growing in my waist and crotch. Now it felt as
though I was being ripped in half. Something was invading
me where there was no substantial hole in my body. Still, I
could not scream, I could not see. The gauzy, milky white
material of the skin clouded my vision. I was blind; my
wind was gone. I could feel myself passing out.
As I went down, my vision started to clear; I wouldn't die
blind after all. I remember hitting the ground hard, my
head bouncing slightly off the floor. As I passed out, I
could smell old spilled coffee on the indoor/outdoor carpet
by my head. I could see in the semi- darkness the patterns
the coffee had made in the carpet when it landed there.
Before me was a puddle of beautiful brown hair that spilled
out in front of my face.
My last thoughts were: "Where the hell did all the pretty
hair come from?"
I don't think I was out long, but it was the idea that I
had passed out at all that got my eyes open and my brain
working again. As though a magical hand had propped me up,
I sat bolt upright. The pain in my head and body was
exquisite; it made the world swim before my eyes and I had
to close them to keep from passing out again. Leaning back
against a desk that I had fallen next to, I remember
thinking may have even hit with my head on the way down. I
stayed there until the fainting spell passed.
There was something flowing over my shoulders. I reached
over with one of my hands and grabbed what ever it was and
examined it. When I did, my arm brushed something fleshy on
my chest. I didn't even pretend not to know what it was. I
paused, and then reached to touch the fleshy mound on my
chest again without looking at it. It reacted to my touch,
becoming just slightly tighter. I could feel the sensation
of touch from both points, from the touch of my fingers and
from the breast when my hand touched it.
I looked down. Yep, I'd been right, two perfectly shaped
breasts with large nipples hanging from my chest.
"Oh hell!" The voice was different, higher, lighter and
softer. I reached up and clutched at my throat. "Testing
one, two, three..."
"Uh oh!" I whispered.
I didn't need further exploration to understand that the
skin I'd gotten was female. The package, it was next to me
on the floor. It snatched it up and looked again at the
lettering. Yep, it said XX all right, female chromosome
pattern. I should have seen that for what it was, damn it.
The rest of the sequence of the serial number came into
focus CFA18 meant of course, Caucasian Female - Age 18. I
still couldn't make out the warning.
I reached down just to check to see if by some miracle I
had been spared my penis. Both penis and scrotum were gone;
they had been replaced by a smaller patch pubic hair and
the soft folds of female genitalia.
Out in the warehouse I could hear voices, different from
the ones that I had come here with. I tried to count the
number of distinct voices and quickly came up with five.
They were all male voices, which meant I alone had drawn a
female skin. Okay, I thought, all bets were off; I didn't
come down here to become a girl. All the skins had been put
on so that transmitter thing could be activated. I should
be able to take this thing off now, so I'm off the hook. I
smiled at the thought. In fact, I couldn't have been
happier. Since I'd been dead set against this to begin
with, the idea that all this was over so quickly was really
making my night -- and no one could blame me for ruining it
for everyone else.
I reached behind me to undo the buttons that had activated
it. Then, I paused for just a moment, wondering if it was
going to hurt like it did when it activated, but I figured
it was worth it to get out of this mess. My hands worked
the back of the suit looking for a lump, a crease or an
opening somewhere. They found nothing except smooth,
continuous skin.
"Skins are imperceptible, even to surgery," a small voice
reminded me.
It had to be there. How the hell else was I supposed to get
it off? If it was gone then that meant...
I shook the thought away before it had a chance to reach
its logical conclusion and panic could set in. Still, I was
getting concerned so I stood up and searched again. For the
first time feeling the strangeness of moving in this body,
the sensation of things missing and new things where there
shouldn't have been any. All that hair kept getting in my
way so I grabbed it and tossed it over one shoulder. Then,
I ran both hands flat over the back of my neck again.
"Jesus, where is it?" I whispered as I continued to explore
the back of my new body.
My hand to slide further away from the base of the neck
looking for and opening, a way out, but it was one
continuous piece of skin.
The skin was smooth and soft -- and quite warm. With that,
my heart started to pump harder. I had to get this thing
off; I couldn't let anyone see me like this. Panicked, my
hands raced faster over the back of my body, searching
franticly for a release somewhere else on my body -- my
body? I searched my scalp, my face the front of my body
between my tits, down over my torso and around my ass --
nothing. The urge to cry grew as I searched the room trying
to get an idea. Briefly, I thought about breaking the
window to the office and using the shards to cut the thing
off me, but I knew that wouldn't work. I had to get this
thing off the way I had gotten it on or it wouldn't come
off at all.
My lips started to tremble with panic. I was close to the
edge of sheer hysteria. Then I saw my reflection in the
glass of the window, because the lights were down, it made
and excellent mirror.
"Oh my God!" I heard myself whisper. "Look at me,"
whispered as I walked closer to the glass to get a better
look.
I was considerably shorter, with just longer than shoulder
length chestnut brown hair flowing from the top of my head
like a brown silk fountain. I reached up to touch it and
watched as the beautiful young girl in the window did the
same. When I touched my hair, she touched hers. The breasts
of the girl in the window were not huge but not small
either, with large brown nipples. It was dark but they
appeared to be perfectly shaped. I reminded myself that
they would be. They were designed to be. Her waist was
narrow and hips broad but not fat.
It was perhaps the most surreal moment of my life. I could
feel myself walking toward the window, drawn by the image I
saw there. I could feel my legs work to move me across the
room. At the same time I could see the stranger in the
reflection of the glass make the same movements in reverse.
As I, or what my consciousness I perceived to be "I,"
approached the glass, I lifted my hand to touch it. The
girl on the other side followed my movements perfectly.
When I said "Oh nooooo!" her lips synced my words as if she
had practiced her line for hours. Worse was that although
she lip-synced the words, it was her voice that I heard. I
could not reproduce what I knew as my voice.
"Okay, don't flip out man," I consoled myself in that other
person's voice. "It will be alright. Just take it off.
That's all you have to do."
"Hey, where's Mikey?"
That snapped me out of my daze and I ducked out of sight.
Once again, I started looking for an opening to the suit. I
remember I could hear myself whimpering, "Come on! Come on!
Come on!" as I tugged on the hair -- hard. "Ouch!" it was
real. I spread the tits on my chest apart hard looking for
an opening. "Ow, shit!" Those were real too apparently.
"Miiikeeeey, come out, come out, where ever you are." I
didn't recognize the voice so I didn't know who was calling
me.
I couldn't figure out how to get it off. I was stuck! I was
going to have to get help. Gathering my clothes, I
stretched my tee shirt on over my chest. It no longer fit.
The breasts lifted the bottom of my cut-off T-shirt and
pushed it away from my belly like tent poles. I was used to
feeling the shirt against my skin, but now, below the
breasts, it made no contact with my skin at all.
Next, I stepped into my briefs. That was a joke, snug in
the hips and behind, nothing but slack fabric in the front
where my genitals would have been and loose at the waist. I
didn't have a choice though; I put my jeans on. They hung
off my body like my underwear had. These pants clearly
weren't cut for this kind of body. The legs of the jeans
seemed to stretch for miles, my feet hidden somewhere
inside.
After rolling up the legs of my pants as best I could, I
grabbed my shoes, slipped them on and made for the door.
When I did, I immediately stepped out of them. My feet were
too small to hope to wear them. In frustration, I gathered
them up with my socks and stuffed them under my arm.
Opening the door, I stuck my head out.
Someone was calling me, "Hey Mike come on out man. Fuck,
what an absolute pussy."
I could feel my lips thin out as I pressed them together in
anger. That had to be Rod. He had done this to me. Now all
I wanted was to kick his ass -- but after he got me out of
this body. A girl had to prioritize.
"Hey, fuck you Rod! I'll kick your ass!" I shouted out in a
distinctly feminine voice.
The sound of my voice echoed off the walls of the warehouse
for what seemed like forever. I knew I'd just fucked up!
Way to prioritize there, Mikey!
"Who the hell was that?" I heard someone ask.
"Alright, we've got BABE-AGE!" someone shouted.
I lowered my head into my hand and moaned, "Oh man."
"Come on out and let's have a look-see, babe," yelled
another unfamiliar voice. I was getting scared. This must
be what a cat feels like in kennel full of dogs.
"YEESSS!" I heard someone else cheer.
Then I heard what turned out to be Gary. "Shut up! That you
Mike? What's happened? You sound, ah... different."
"Ha! You don't know the half of it," I called back. God
that voice was sexy, I hated it!
"Damn! She sounds hot as hell."
"I said to shut the fuck up Rodney, right now! That she is
Mike and you'd better remember he's my best friend,
asshole!" Gary sounded a little too annoyed to me.
"Fuck off man, I'm just having a little fun! And don't call
me Rodney. You know I hate that," and then, "Come on out
Mikey. We'll stop. Just come on out so we can get the fuck
outta here!"
"A-fuckin'-men to that," I sighed and winced. That voice. I
just wasn't going to get used to hearing that voice come
out of my head.
I came out from around a stack of boxes that blocked the
view of the office I had changed in. As I entered, my
circle of friend's faces, that I could not have ever
recognized, met me. We were all Caucasian by birth and I
still was, but here stood two black men in their early
twenties, one oriental man, perhaps in his early teens, and
a really handsome Native American that stood nearly six and
a half feet tall. He was perhaps twenty or twenty-one.
There was one more Caucasian man in the corner sipping some
clear liquid from a glass bottle.
"Whoa..."
"Unbelievable..."
"Gorgeous..."
"Wow!"
"Mikey?"
I was blushing; I could feel it. I can't say why, except it
was a little embarrassing listing to all those compliments,
but I have to be honest, a little part of me deep down
inside really enjoyed it.
"I think introductions are in order," I said, "I guess you
all know who I am."
"Yeah, you must be Michelle." That got a giggle out of
everyone but the Indian and me. I deduced that the Indian
must be Gary. I walked over to him and looked up at his
face. He looked back down and smiled.
I hadn't realized how much my change had affected my
height, but it was clear that I was now the shortest one of
the lot. Before, I had been the second tallest in our
group, Frank had been taller than me by about an inch, but
this guy was tall. It hurt my neck to look up at him.
Looking down at me the large Native American asked,
"Waaassss Up?" in a very deep voice.
That was my pal. I really can't express it in words, but it
was good to see a friendly face, even if I didn't recognize
it as my friend's face. It gave me just the sort of comfort
I was desperately in need of right at that moment.
"It looks like you are."
This time everybody laughed. The tension was broken for the
time being.
Gary said, "You look great, Mike! That body suits you. You
really look gorgeous!"
"Yeah well, don't get used to it. This," I gestured at
myself with my hands, "isn't what I signed on for." I
looked inquisitively at the other faces and asked, "Rod?"
All the faces were staring at me slack jawed, but none were
responding. That irritated me. "Hello, Rod? One of you is
Rod, right?"
Each one was undressing me with his eyes. If the shoe had
been on the other foot I would have been doing it too, but
I have to say, it felt really awkward to think that the
people that you thought were your friends were now trying
to imagine what you looked like naked. I wondered briefly
if real females felt this way around their male friends.
The oriental youth broke his trance and spoke up. "Uh yeah!
That's me Michel -- ah, Mike -- sorry."
"Yeah Okay, how do I get this off?" I bent my head down and
started searching the back of my neck again. "I tried
getting it off back there in the office after I realized
there had been a mistake, but I couldn't seen to find the
catch to this thing. You said that if the transmitter was
activated I could remove it, so there must a trick to it."
I lifted my eyes to watch their faces and didn't like what
I was seeing. They all started looking at the ground and
shuffling their feet.
"Aw God, this isn't happening," I groaned. "You do know how
to remove these things don't you? I really need to get out
of this costume. I can't leave here like this."
"Uh, Yeah, I can it get off you, don't worry about that
Mikey. Just not... not right now."
I felt my heart skip a beat. I took a deep breath, forced
myself to calm down and asked, "When?"
"Mmm... Uh... uh..." he stuttered.
"Uuuuhhhhh... WHEN!"
Gary walked up to me and put an arm around my shoulder to
try to calm me down. It was no different than the thousands
of times he had done it before, but it repulsed me for some
reason and I quickly shrugged it off.
"When Rod, When! What the hell did you do Rodney?"
Gary held up a long black box that looked a lot like an old
time TV remote. You know the ones, like you see in antique
shops. It had what looked like a digital timer on it and it
was running backward. The time was Ό?22. I could feel my
stomach turn into a small hard stone.
"There's a forty-eight hour reset time lockout." It was
Gary.
"What the hell does that mean?" I was starting to shake and
was badly scared.
"Well, it means that no way, no how can we get these things
to disengage for the next two days," said Gary.
"WHAT! No fucking way I'm staying like this for the next
two days. Fuck this, fuck that and most importantly, fuck
YOU!" I was fuming - No jokes, Okay. I'm serious!
"Look. I can understand that you're upset," Gary said,
trying to get me to calm down.
"UPSET!" I turned on him screaming. "I didn't want to do
this in the first place, but if you whine and moan long
enough or make a good enough excuse, ole Mike will cave in
-- so I come along. I was almost killed by that fucking
thing I put on back there," I screamed, pointing back at
the bank of offices I had just come from. "I black out and
when I come to I've just had a fucking sex change
operation! Then you tell me, `Oh well, sorry Mikey, you'd
better get used to it cause you're stuck for the next two
days.' You want to trade places with me? Let's see just how
fucking upset you get. I have to say it again, 'Fuck you!'
Find a way to get this off of me NOW!"
"MIKE!" Gary shouted. It was enough to shock me back into
some semblance of sanity. Gary continued in a slightly
softer tone of voice, "We can't! Get it under control
before someone hears you shouting. You never had to come
along. Yes, I bribed you. I did it to sweeten the pot a
bit. We needed you to come along. It wouldn't have worked
with just five. Shit Mikey, I wanted you come with us, just
once. I thought it'd it be fun too. I was wrong. I'm sorry
about all that -- especially now -- but you never had to
accept. You could have always just ducked out."
All I could do was blink at him blank faced. I was stuck! I
remember thinking that it couldn't get any worse that this.
I was going to spend the next two days of my life as a
female. I was stuck! Somewhere off in the distance Gary was
still talking but I couldn't make out what he was saying. I
was stuck! I kept playing that phrase over and over in my
head. The sounds in the room seemed to get smaller and
smaller like I was hearing them at the end of a deep
tunnel. After a few seconds, I fainted.
I didn't hit the floor this time. Someone caught me and
eased me down to the floor. I don't know who it was. When I
came to, everyone was standing around me looking down at
me. Except Rod, who was standing at my feet, bent over
slightly with his head cocked sideways.
For a minute, I didn't know what he was doing.
"What the hell are looking at?" I asked.
I had surprised him; he hadn't seen I'd come around, as his
attention was someplace else. His head popped up and he
started to blush.
"Were you trying to look me up? You were trying to look at
my tits while I was out cold, weren't you? You're a real
shit, you know that Rodney. A Class-A cow turd."
It felt strange to have a guy, looking at you with sexual
intent. That made feel sick and, dare I say it, violated!
That made me mad all over again. I reached down and tried
to pull my shirt down further. I was becoming very self-
conscious around these guys. Suddenly, I didn't trust them
any more.
"That's real nice language for a lady to use," he retorted.
"Lady?" I shot back, "I'm no lady, Goddamn it!"
He could see that he'd punched one of my buttons. "You'd
better check again little girl! The world just became a
very different place for you and you'd do well to remember
that."
"What the fuck is that supposed to mean?" I asked him
harshly. "You gonna try to rape me? Maybe try to beat me up
big man?"
That last one just popped out. I was sorry the minute I
said it but it was too late to pull it back and I knew I
was going to have to backup anything I said from this point
forward. I was still playing the man's game and I couldn't
back down now or I'd pay an even greater price, yet my
mouth still kept writing checks my body couldn't cash.
"I'll kick your ass any day you decide you want a piece of
me. Even like this, I'm more of a man than you'll ever be
and you'd do well to remember that, dickhead!" I screamed
at him.
Before anyone could react, he was on me. His new body was
very nimble. He had a hold of my hair and was spinning
around me to get a better purchase on me. I pushed with all
my might to gain some advantage, but he was too big and
strong. I began to feel sick. He was really going to hurt
me and I couldn't do anything to stop him. He was rearing
back to rearrange my new face when Gary, Frank and Kit
grabbed him from behind and hoisted both him and I up until
his purchase on me was broken and he was off me.
"What the hell do you think you're doing?" Gary shouted at
him.
I guess Gary couldn't resist the temptation to punch him
just once in stomach. That was all it took to remove the
wind from his sails and Rod was quite again.
"You do that often Rodney, beat up girls?" Gary slammed him
down on a stack boxes and put his face nose to nose with
Rod's. "You just sit there and behave. We aren't going to
start fighting among ourselves."
Rod said nothing.
"You guys watch him, keep him calm," Gary instructed Frank
and Kit. "He may be strung out from the effects of being
changed. We really don't know how much these damn things
have really changed us."
Rod seemed to be okay now. I, on the other hand was shaking
badly. That whole scene had been bad for me. I had been
quickly over powered by short little guy maybe eighteen
years old and I suspected that if Rod had unloaded on me,
my injuries would have been much worse than they would have
been in my male persona. I began to understand that in this
body the skin was more delicate, the bones somewhat more
fragile. I had heard that women can handle pain better than
most men though. I had also heard that it was a byproduct
of hundreds of thousands of years of child bearing, and
quite possibly a byproduct of being beaten up by hundreds
of thousands of men over the centuries.
Gary came over to where I was standing and asked, "You Okay
buddy?"
Buddy! Man, I had needed to hear that. I had two impulses
at that moment. My first impulse was to hug him. My second
was, Yuck! Why the hell would I want to hug him?
"Yeah, I think so. I just can't stop shaking." I held out
one tremor-convulsed hand to show him. Looking up at his
concerned face, I asked him directly, "Gary, what the hell
am I supposed to do now?"
Rod must have heard me because he shouted, "Learn to piss
sitting down."
Gary flashed an angry look at Rod and Rod shut is pie hole.
Gary then put his arm around my shoulders again and this
time I let it stay there. It seemed to help the shakes.
Well it was out there now. The smallest of them could get
an advantage over me very quickly. I would have to watch my
step. I didn't know how much else had been changed by these
suits. I wasn't sure I wanted to find out. Rod was right,
for me the world had indeed become a very different place.
The thought scared me deeply.