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I My name is Kelly, or if you prefer, as my wife does, Kellie. When I was born, I was rather small, just over 4 lbs and barely 13 inches long, and as I grew, this small stature followed me. Although my mother was 5' 10" and my dad 6'5", I was not destined to grow to anywhere near their height. Growing up, and all through school I was the smallest in my class, trailing even the girls. For the most part throughout school, people would assume I was 3 to 4 years younger than my actual age. This continued even through high school and college when I reached my current height of 5' 7" and weight of 127 lbs. Both of my parents had played sports in school, mother excelling in basketball and volleyball, while dad played baseball, football and basketball. Although I was quite athletic, my physique did not lend itself to any of these sports. Where I did do well was in gymnastics, especially where grace of movement was more essential than was strength. Also, I excelled at dance where grace of movement was paramount. While the strength issue kept me from making the boys' gymnastic teams, I continued to practice with them and with the girl's team. I found I really enjoyed the floor exercises which allowed me to use all my dance talent. Even though I couldn't be a part of that team either, more and more I found myself practicing with them. The coach was willing to allow me to be there and none of the girls had a problem either. I kind of became the team mascot and cheerleader. Even with my diminutive size, my parents never showed a minute of disappointment in me. Sure, dad would have loved to coach a little league team with me playing or to have seen me star in football, but it was never an issue. Something he told me many times helped me to understand. Whenever I was feeling down, he would sit me down and tell me, "It doesn't matter how big or strong you are. What matters is that you try your best at whatever you do and be true to yourself. We are all unique individuals, and we don't need to live up to any one's expectations but our own. Set high goals for yourself and strive to achieve them. Treat others as you would have them treat you and you will be a success in life." So, with the support of my parents, I pursued the activities which interested me, and in which I could excel. Academically, I was interested in art and science but fared well in all my classes. Outside of school, I stuck with the gymnastics, but my favorite pursuit was dancing. It allowed me an athletic outlet that best fit my abilities and interest. And never for a minute did either of my parents question me. They were there at every performance cheering and applauding louder than anyone else. Even during my junior year when I decided to take ballet and was the only guy in the class they were proud of my decision and achievement. Just so you don't think my life was perfect while I was growing up, there is one thing that early on became a point of contention with my parents and lasted through my childhood... and beyond. Somewhere in my early childhood, maybe between 6 and 8, I decided I either was, should have been, or wanted to be, a girl. Although my parents didn't understand it, and did everything they could to dissuade me, they allowed me to explore these feelings. The first time I had the opportunity to dress in girl's clothes was Halloween when I was in third grade. I had been pestering my parents and they finally gave in. My mom positioned their consent saying, "Tom let him do it. Maybe when he's wearing his Cinderella dress and comes face to face with his friends he'll realize why boys don't wear dresses." But when the day of the school party came, mom helped me not only with the dress, but with panties, a camisole, and shoes. She even helped to style my longish hair, so I didn't have to wear a cheap wig, and added a bit of makeup to make me look more girlish. Whatever my parents thought would happen when I went to the Halloween party, it didn't happen. There were a few kids that teased me; but most of them, especially the girls, thought it was great. So, the course was set, and as far as I was concerned there was no going back. The next challenge was the family Halloween party being given by my aunt and cousin. It took some real convincing before my parents gave in, but finally, I got my way, when they saw how happy I was they became very supportive. I knew mom would give in but was really surprised by dad. "Kelly, as long as you're OK with this, we'll support you, but just in case you get embarrassed, why don't you take your old Superman costume with you, and you can change if necessary." Although I knew there was no way I'd be changing, I agreed to take the other costume with me. But it could stay in the car, because I wasn't going to need it. "Dad, you always tell me to just be me; and this is who I am." Dad was surprised by the way I used his words to defend myself, but I think it made him realize how serious I was about this. So, he smiled and gave me a hug, and I knew we were OK. When we walked into the party, it was already in full swing. All my aunts and uncles and cousins from both mom's side and dad's side were there. Including the three of us, there were 14 parents and 15 kids, plus two grandmas who counted above all. My cousins were split, 7 boys and 7 girls ranging in age from 8 to 15, and they were all surprised by my costume. But it only took a few minutes for them to be OK, except for two of the older boys. Brice and Mark were both 15 and wanted nothing to do with the rest of us kids, especially me. Whenever I was anywhere close to them, they'd call me a fag and give me a shove. All my aunts and uncles expressed their surprise, but agreed it was just a phase. My grandmas agreed I was very brave to wear what I wanted, and both thought I was adorable. Their comments went a long way to confirming to myself, who I was. So, the trend was set for all future Halloween parties. Not a year passed where I didn't wear a girl's costume. Early on, it was a princess or a witch or cheerleader but eventually I also dressed as a nurse, a Dutch girl complete with wooden shoes, a 1950s car hop, a prom queen and even a bride. For many years, due to my small size, it was much easier to find kids costumes so the princess outfits outnumbered everything else. As I grew up, I was always open about who I was and tried to find 'girl things' to do whenever possible. One of my favorite things to do was shopping with mom. I could wander through the clothes in the department stores imagining I could choose an outfit to wear. Although I couldn't shop in the stores, what I could do is occasionally buy something at a yard sale. I would save my allowance for weeks and then beg mother to take me to yard sales to find something new. By the time I was in high school, I had become really good at putting together an outfit for any occasion. It might be jeans and a pull over for a casual afternoon, or a skirt and blouse for an afternoon hanging out at the mall with my girlfriends. But my favorite was picking an outfit for a special event. The first time I did this was for my cousin Mark's wedding and then later that same summer for the wedding for my cousin Cindy. Both events were incredible, and I think mom had as much fun shopping for the dresses and helping me get dressed as did I. During my high school years, I dated several girls, and didn't try to hide my feminine side from them. While it never became much of an issue, it was the down fall of each relationship. I understood what was happening, and who could blame them. Teen aged girls were interested in teen aged guys, and while my girly side could be fun for a while it was not what they were after long term. Pretty much the same pattern continued through my college years. I dated a lot of girls, never hiding my feminine side and always aware of what the eventual outcome would be. During my second year at the university I dated the same girl for most of the first term and even lost my virginity while wearing one of her baby doll nighties. Her name was Denise, and we seemed naturally attracted to each other. That special night was exquisite. She had taken me out to a movie and for pizza, insisting on choosing my outfit and helping me with my makeup. Since we were almost the same size, everything for the evening came out of her closet. In all aspects, the night couldn't have gone better and when I woke up the next morning, I was still wearing the nightie, and curled up in bed with her. We dated for a few more months, until she met a guy who interested her, and our relationship ended. I would occasionally see her around campus, and while she'd wave and smile, we never spoke again. The summer before my senior year, I stayed at school to accept an internship with one of my professors. Over the summer, I met a girl who I thought was my perfect match. We met at a social mixer sponsored by a fraternity and a sorority on campus. They were trying to keep social activities ongoing for students who stayed on campus for the summer. Rachael Kramer was the kind of girl I thought I would be, if I was a full time as a girl. She had a classy yet sexy style and a fun and flirty personality. We dated for a few months and I quickly felt myself growing close to her and decided I had to disclose my feminine side. I picked a quiet Friday evening to expose my secret to Rachael. We had decided on a quiet evening in her apartment with Chinese carry out and a movie. After we finished dinner, Rachael was making herself comfortable on the sofa, ready for the movie, when I told her I had something important to discuss with her. Initially, she thought I was breaking up with her, and was relieved when I told that I was not. But I was sure she would toss me out when she heard what I had to say. Rachael sat and listened to me as I poured out my heart and my story. At times, she was serious, listening intently and at other times she was laughing at my tale. I couldn't judge her true feelings, and that frustrated me. When I was done talking, we sat for five minutes without another word being spoken. I waited for her to turn it over in her mind determined to let her speak first. It was reassuring when a smile found its way to her face. She steadied herself, took a deep breath and spoke. "This is a lot to comprehend, but I can see you're serious. I would have never guessed, but now that I sit and look at you, I'll bet you make an adorable little girl." So, there it was, almost all good, until her last three words. She didn't envision me as a beautiful woman, or pretty girl, but as an 'adorable little girl', and that hurt. I knew to expect something like that but hearing her say the words hurt more than I imagined they would. Rachael leaned towards me and took my hands holding them and giving me a very caring look. "So, when do I get to meet her? Does she have a different name, or is she called Kelly as well?" We talked a while longer and decided Rachael would come by my apartment the next day to meet the feminine me. She wanted me to be dressed when she arrived, so she could avoid any boy/girl conflict in her mind. I suggested we could go somewhere for lunch, but she was far from ready for that. "You mean you parade yourself around in public all girlie looking? This I really got to see." When Saturday morning arrived, I had hardly slept a wink. All night my nerves kept me on edge. Finally, my alarm went off and it was time for me to start getting ready, and the moment the realization hit me, my brain went into auto pilot and the first thing it said was you need sleep. I lay back down, promising myself it would be for ten minutes only; and slept for four hours, waking up at noon. I looked at the clock and screamed... Rachael would be here in two hours and I hadn't started to get ready, but this worked for me. With my brain still in auto pilot I just did what I needed to do, no second guessing on what to wear or how to do my makeup, just do it and get it done. At two o'clock, I had just finished setting out a chilled bottle of chardonnay thinking it might be needed to get us through the next few hours. As open as I had been throughout my life, my confidence was a bit shaken. Coming out to a girl I was dating, especially one who I really cared about was going to be tough, but when the doorbell rang, I was ready. I had selected a beige skirt that came just to my knees and a peach colored pull over blouse. Beneath that, I wore beige panties, a matching padded bra and nude pantyhose. I finished with a brown pair of penny loafers, simple gold ear rings, bracelet and necklace and pulled my hair back in a high ponytail held in place by a brown scrunchee. For makeup, I kept it simple, eye shadow and mascara, light blush and peach color lip gloss. When I opened the door, Rachael stood there looking and not saying a word. She had a completely shocked look on her face, her eyes wide open as was her mouth, but not a sound came forth. She looked me up and down; finally stepping through the doorway and having me spin, taking in how I was dressed. At last, I was able to close the door behind her and invited her to have a seat on the sofa while I poured the wine. I handed the first glass to Rachael, and then set mine on the coffee table and sat in the chair across from her. I carefully smoothed my skirt as I sat, and then crossed my ankles to the side keeping my knees together in a relaxed yet demure position. I took a deep breath to help me relax and waited for Rachael to speak. It took her another couple of minutes to find her voice, but after a sip or two of wine she finally said something. "I don't believe this! I don't believe you! You're amazing. I was expecting you to look like a skinny guy in a dress, or a 9-year-old playing dress up in her mother's clothes, but this... this is unreal. You look like any other college girl on campus, an honest to goodness real girl. This is amazing!" I was thrilled and got up, walked over to where Rachael sat and hugged her. "Thank you so much. I was afraid you'd be offended. I really tried hard to look just right, but this is pretty much how I look every day. I mean there's half the time or more that I have to be in guy mode, but the rest of the time when I'm in girl mode this is pretty much how I dress. Not always a skirt, a lot of time jeans and occasionally dresses, but I try and choose something appropriate for the occasion." Rachael returned my hug, then stood and moved me to arms-length again examining me. "Do you have many more clothes, or just a few outfits? You mean you really have enough outfits to live as a girl if you want to? I don't know what to say!" We talked for a few more hours, and Rachael checked out my complete wardrobe commenting several times how jealous she was of some of my clothes. She had me change three or four times and model different outfits before we both wore down. As we sat there, a smile came across her face... maybe not so much a smile as a wicked grin. "Let's go out to dinner." She pronounced it as a challenge. "Yesterday, you said we could. I want to see how you act. I want to see how other people react to you. I mean, I don't think most of them would know, maybe a few of the girls if they studied you close, but it's even hard for me to look at you and see any part of a boy. Come on, let's go before I change my mind." So, started the next chapter in our relationship. Rachael seemed to accept me, and we dated both as boy and girl friend, and, two girlfriends. To me, there didn't seem to be a down side, but as time went by, I could sense a change in Rachael, and how she treated me. I knew what was coming, I just didn't know when and didn't suspect how. The change in Rachael's attitude seemed to happen quickly. It seemed like Monday she was fine, and by Friday we were for all intents and purposes done. All that had to happen was for the final act to play out. I knew that Rachael was getting a lot of grief from her friends about dating me. Since I was so open about my feminine side, they all knew about me, and they didn't approve. I knew the end was approaching, but I didn't expect it to end the way it did. Rachael was a member of Sigma Phi sorority and they were throwing a big costume party for Halloween, and there was no doubt that we would attend. What I didn't expect was the costume she picked for me. It was best described as a naughty school girl outfit. There was a short pink and grey pleated skirt that barely came to mid-thigh. The top was a plain white blouse with all but one button removed. The button was positioned at the base of my cleavage created by a heavily padded bra. There was a pair of pink and white saddle shoes and bunches of cheap dangly jewelry. Rachael teased my hair into a big hair mess, and, added enough makeup to make me look like a cheap hooker, but I played along. Rachael wore a witch's costume, and with her attitude, fit the part. But despite that, the party went well, and I enjoyed myself, actually, too much, and got very drunk. My last real conscious memories of the party was leaving with Rachael and two of her friends. I settled in the back seat of her car and quickly fell asleep. Sometime later, I recall Rachael waking me up and I assumed we were walking into her apartment, but I was wrong. We ended up entering a lesbian leather bar. They too were having a costume party, and no one took special note of us. We settled in at the bar, and I sat there with my head laying forward on the bar, hearing the bartender say, "She's not in any kind of condition to be drinking." And then heard Rachael, "She won't need anything to drink, but give this to the first girl who offers to buy her one." With that she handed him a key on a short chain. At the same time, I felt my right wrist being handcuffed to the bar rail. Before I could utter a sound, a soft rubber ball was crammed into my mouth effectively gagging me and through blurry eyes, I could see Rachael and her friends leave the bar. From that point forward I don't remember much, until I was again being handcuffed. This time it was by the police and I was being placed in the back seat of a squad car. The next time I came around, I was in a cell at the police station, my head pounding and trying to figure out what happened. It was early morning when I had my first visitor. She was a police officer and medic who came to check on me. She told me I would live but she didn't know why. "Your blood alcohol level was .16, twice the legal limit. You're pretty lucky to be alive. I'm going to give you a shot that will help with the headache and nausea. The best thing for you to do is sleep." Sometime later, the same officer returned and filled me in the best that she could, and then asked me to tell her what I remember. Apparently shortly after Rachael dropped me at the bar, the bar tender, who was worried about me, called the police. Before they arrived, two other girls in the bar decided to fight to see who would take me home. In the end, all three of us ended up in jail. I asked her. "Why me? Did I do something wrong." And she answered, "The charge is drunk and disorderly, but that's for the judge to decide on Monday." I was really confused, and still hung-over; but had enough sense to ask about an attorney. She told me a public defender would speak with me Monday morning before I saw the judge but mentioned there was another attorney on call if I wanted to talk to her. "She'll give you about an hour free, and then charge you. Might be a good idea to talk to her." II Over the next few hours, my life seemed to spiral downwards. Then the attorney showed up and things slowly got better. Her name was Vivian Clark, and she was both soothing and reassuring. "Well, we've got a bit of a mess to sort out here, but I think we can manage." She looked at me and smiled, which I didn't have enough strength to do in return. "I'm going to ask you a few questions, and I'll try to make them yes or no so you don't have to try and talk. Is that OK?" Right then, let's begin. "Do you know the two other girls who were arrested with you?" I started to shake my head, but felt it slosh a bit and make me dizzy. I decided it would be easier to answer. "No idea." She continued, "Did you voluntarily enter the bar and agree to the little game being played?" "No way. I'm not even sure where it was. Never been there before." "Can you tell me about your girlfriend? Are the two of you on good terms?" "We've been together for a few months and have mostly been on good terms, but lately things have been a bit strained." Now she had a much more serious look on her face as if she we're really thinking about the next question. "I don't want to pry, but I've seen things like this before, but is this your first lesbian relationship... or hers? Is it possible there's an old boyfriend or girlfriend that might be causing trouble?" I listened to her ask these questions and had to take a minute to let them sink in and for my brain to process them before I could answer. "I don't think you understand our relationship exactly. I know the bar I was in was a lesbian bar, but I'm not a lesbian, and unless Rachael has been hiding something from me, neither is she." This seemed to really confuse her and in my drunken state, it took me a while to realize what was happening. When I did, I didn't know if I would laugh, or if I would cry. "You don't know do you? You really don't know? What did the police tell you?" Now she really looked confused. Twice she started to ask a question and stopped. Then she seemed to rethink what it was she wanted to know, and then asked, "Maybe the best thing to do is for you to tell me what I need to know. If I keep asking questions like this it might take hours to get to the point, so why don't you just tell me what you think I need to know and then I'll ask questions from there." I thought about it for a minute, and then decided on a course of action before I spoke. "You implied I might be a lesbian, and I guess the answer depends on your perspective." I could see now she was really confused, so I continued quickly. "What you need to know, and I can only assume you don't, is that I'm a guy. I know based upon my appearance it might be hard to believe, but trust me, it's true. This is the costume my girlfriend chose for me for the Halloween party we were at, and I guess it's hard to tell any different." For the next several minutes, the attorney continued to ask questions, but never got anything solid out. She finally picked up the copy of the police report and read it over, finally shaking her head. "You've managed to fool us all. I mean, I don't know if it was your intention, but that's the result. The police report identifies you as Kelly Burke, age 21, female. But the box for ID information says, 'None'. I can only assume you didn't have your ID on you when you came in?" For the next 30 minutes, I gave the attorney an overview of my life from my early years through my relationship with Rachael. She took a few notes, but for the most part just listened. When I finished, she thought for a minute before she spoke. "Would you mind if I asked you to stand up? I'm having a hard time with this, and I hate to admit it, but I don't see one square inch of you that says boy. I'm not trying to be critical or judgmental, but I would never have guessed." For a few more minutes, we talked, and she asked several more questions before she seemed ready to wrap things up. "OK, here's what we need to do. Your bail is only $100 so I'll post it and get you out of here. We'll add it to your bill. Then we need to get you home and you need to do two things: get some sleep and get yourself cleaned up and looking like a boy for court on Monday. I'll straighten out the ID issue with the police, but it may still come up with the judge. You need to make a good impression there." I explained to her that I didn't have a car or a way home, and she offered to drive me. "Can't have you taking a taxi dressed like that! Plus, it'll give us a chance to talk some more." She was gone for about an hour, and when she returned, the jailer was with her, and I was released. She also had brought me a long jacket that covered me much better and provided some protection from the cool October weather. Additionally, she had a rather thick file in her hand. "It's the arrest record. I want to discuss it with you. We'll talk while I drive, but we'll need some more time with it before we see the judge on Monday. By the way, do you have any one who can stay with you for the next few days? With everything you've been through, you might need a little looking after." I explained that normally I'd call Rachael, but that probably wasn't a good idea. She heartily agreed. "OK, how about this. I'll get you home and you can shower and change, and then you come stay with me. That way I can keep an eye on you, and we can talk whenever you feel up to it. Might take a day or two for your head to clear." I was really confused but didn't want to look beyond her hospitality. I had to admit that my brain was still foggy, and I wasn't thinking clearly. Being out of my apartment also kept me away from Rachael, who could show up at any time using her key for access. I was in over my head on this and needed whatever help I could get. We made a quick stop at my apartment, and we're on our way to Ms Clark's condo. It was after 4 PM, and I was dozing as we drove, but every time I would feel myself starting to sleep I would be jolted awake by bizarre images and strange nightmares. I'd never experienced anything like it before and was frightened by what I was experiencing. At Vivian's (She asked me to call her that, as Ms Clark was way too formal and made her feel old) we sat in the living room and talked for a few minutes before she showed me the bedroom where I could sleep. "I want you to understand what's happening to you with the nightmares. Do you remember a medic treating you at the police station?" I thought about it for a minute and did remember. "She told me she was giving me a shot to help me feel better. At that point, I would have agreed to anything." She made a note on her tablet and continued. "We'll deal with that later, but she did give you a vitamin shot, and she also drew blood to perform the blood alcohol tests. That's not good, since she probably didn't explain that to you, but it's good because she also found something else, two more things: rohypnol and ketamine. Both which have medical uses, but in this case, are considered date rape drugs." I was floored, with the reduced level of brain function combined with total exhaustion, this was too much to handle. All that I could utter was, "How, why, who..." and I collapsed into a worthless pile, shaking and sweating and crying. Vivian suggested I go to bed and try and get some sleep. She gave me some Tylenol to help my head and led me to the bed. "Go ahead and get settled. Sleep as long as you can, the rest will do you more for you than anything else. We'll talk more in the morning." Once I fell asleep, it was like the world had gone wrong. At best, you could call them bizarre dreams, at worst nightmares and hallucinations. I tossed and turned, and would wake up suddenly, having to wait for my mind to clear before going back to sleep. When I finally woke up, I was surprised to see Vivian seated in a chair next to the bed sipping a cup of tea. "Would you care for some tea? I've just made a fresh pot." When I was able to fully wake up, I sat there sipping the tea feeling somewhat refreshed but still a bit groggy. Vivian placed her hand across my forehead and pronounced my fever was gone. "I was rather worried about you earlier. I heard you kind of moaning in your sleep, and when I came in to check you were burning up. I managed to get some more Tylenol into you and you fell right back to sleep, but I wasn't far from taking you to the hospital." We sat there in the bedroom talking for another hour, with Vivian going through the arrest record and asking a few questions. "I think it's all a bunch of dung! There was no complaint filed against you, only against the two girls who started the fight. There's even a statement from the bartender saying she placed the original call due to his concern for you. I think we'll get this thrown out before we even see the judge, but we still need to discuss the drug issue, and your girlfriend's part in this." At this point, my brain was going into overload again, and Vivian could sense it. "Why don't you get yourself cleaned up, and I'll see about dinner. Anything special you'd like." I was shocked. "Dinner? How long did I sleep?" Vivian smiled. "Considering you didn't get to sleep until after 5:30, you did alright. It's almost 7 now, so 13 hours or so, but you probably slept only half that time. You were up and down so much I eventually pulled this chair in here so I could keep an eye on you. I think you can do with something light for dinner. I can do some soup, and maybe some cheese and crackers. Take your time getting cleaned up and just come on out when you're ready." After another night's sleep, I was feeling pretty good on Monday morning, up until Vivian reminded me we needed to be in court later in the day. But there was a bit of a change to the schedule. "I had my associate file some papers with the court this morning and we're not on the docket now until 3 this afternoon. In the meantime, I took the liberty of contacting the bar tender to appear, and had my associate drive by your apartment, just to check on things. Call me suspicious, but it worked out. He ended up running into your old girlfriend. Seems like she was cleaning out your apartment, although she claimed to only be recovering her personal belongings, but he had his doubt when he saw the computer, big screen TV and stereo. So, she's now scheduled to be in court this afternoon as well. It will be a good time to ask her a few questions about the drugs as well." The afternoon in court went well for me with all charges being dismissed. I didn't want to be vindictive, but after hearing Rachael testify I was ready to push her buttons a bit. In front of the judge, she called me a transvestite whore, which didn't sit well with anybody. Although she didn't deny giving me the drugs, she didn't outright admit it. But when Vivian suggested to the judge that a search warrant might be justified, she changed her story. But she still pleaded innocence claiming I had brought the drugs to her apartment and self-administered them prior to leaving for the party. She was a very bad liar, and nobody really believed her, but no one had hard proof. But it was obvious the judge wasn't happy with her story. Once the charges against me were dropped, the judge addressed Rachael. "Young lady, between the concerns over the drugs, and the removal of possessions from Mr. Burke's apartment, I have reason enough to have you taken into custody on several charges, all I need is the consent of Mr. Burke to proceed." He looked over at me and I was shaking my head no. "But since I don't believe he is ready to push that, I am going to take things in my own hands. Based upon the situation, I'm placing you in a program of court appointed supervision for a period of 90 days. During this time, I suggest you live an exemplary life style, because if the supervisor reports she's even had a hint of bad behavior, you'll be back in this court and I guarantee you won't like what I have to say. Do you understand?" To her credit, Rachael kept her mouth shut with her eyes cast downwards. I think she finally realized just how much trouble she was in and was happy to be walking out of the courtroom and not in custody. But the judge wasn't quite finished. "Additionally, Ms Kramer, I am issuing a restraining order keeping you away from Mr. Burke. At no time, can you knowingly and willfully go within 100 yards of him and by no means shall you ever show up on his doorstep, call, email or text him. And, if even one derogatory word about him shows up on any social media site, I guarantee you'll spend the next few years counting the bars on your jail cell." So, ended this ridiculous and outrageous time of my life. While I was free to go, and Rachael was out of my life, there was a crazy emptiness waiting for me. I knew it was there, and I knew it would take time to deal with it, but I'd been there before and knew I'd be OK. III Life settled into a good pattern for me, and for the next few months I focused on school and getting ready for my job search. I would be graduating with dual degrees in art design and prelaw. The design degree was my primary passion, but the law degree came out of a few classes I took to develop a minor and then became interested enough to finish the program. When I started attending job fairs I had several different choices to pursue. While my guidance counselor pushed me towards law school, that wasn't where my heart was, but I was not having great success pursuing design jobs. At her advice, I was attending a job fair for business and legal positions. Lately, I had been spending more and more time living in my female roll and was more comfortable with this. I knew there was still a place and time for Kelly the guy to show up, but more and more it was the girl who was here. On Saturday afternoon when I was getting ready for the job fair, I selected a simple brown skirt and beige blouse. I matched it with nude hose and brown heels. I fixed my hair in a high pony tail, picked simple jewelry and basic makeup and pronounced myself ready. For the most part, the job fair was what I expected. Based upon my degree, there were a few business opportunities available, mostly doing graphic design work supporting point of purchase advertising and web site development. While these jobs were interesting, it wasn't an area of design that held any particular fascination for me. There were a couple of law firms I spoke with that had paralegal positions available, but these didn't interest me either, and the starting salary was surprisingly low. I had finished for the day and was leaving the conference center where the event was being held when I heard someone calling from behind me. "Kelly? Kelly Burke... is that you?" I was a bit shocked, but stopped and turned, and standing there was Vivian Clark. It had been months since I had seen her. I hadn't thought about running into her, but it made sense for her to be here. "Hi Ms Clark. Nice to see you again. And not going to court this time." She chuckled at my lame attempt at humor. "So, are you considering a change in vocation? I remember you being into design of some sort." I was a bit surprised she remembered me saying that, but at the same time pleased. "I guess I'm open to a lot of possibilities at this point. My design degree is focused on art and art design, but to be honest, I'm not finding much. There were a few positions available here that could work and get me a bit of experience while I wait for the right job to come along." She acted surprised but, I'm sure she understood the situation. She shook her head a little and smiled, "I can't imagine you having a problem, but I understand how important it is to find just the right job. I'll tell you what, why don't you join me for a cup of coffee and let me run a few things by you." We ended up at a nearby Starbuck's each ordering a cappuccino and deciding to split a giant-sized orange muffin. "Kelly, I'm glad to see you're doing better than last time we met. I hope you've put that episode behind you and moved on with your life." It was nice meeting her again, and I was particularly interested in what she wanted to 'run by me' as I was running short of opportunities. "I think that weekend qualifies as the low point in my life, but I was certainly lucky that you were there to help me through it. I don't know how it would have turned out without you. If I haven't said it before, Ms Clark, thank you a thousand times over." She smiled, and might have even blushed a bit. "First of all, it's Vivian, remember. Next, I was glad to help. I've got to admit, that was one of the stranger situations I've seen, but it did turn out OK. So, tell me, what exactly is it that you're looking for in a job? You never know, I just might know someone who can help. And if I don't, we are looking for someone in our research department. In this day and age, 90% of the research is done online, so it makes for long days in front of the computer, but it also pays better then delivering pizzas." I had to laugh, because I had recently considered a pizza delivery job just to have some income. "I really wanted to find something in the design field. My emphasis is on art and I've had a lot of art history classes and I guess my dream job would be in a museum or gallery. But so far, I'm finding the opportunities few and far between. The closest I've come so far is a job as a sketch artist for a comic tee shirt company. I guess I could do it, but it really doesn't interest me. My councilor talked me into attending some of these other job fairs, especially since I did the pre-law curriculum. I've decided not to go back to law school, but I thought I might still find something interesting." Vivian looked a bit confused by what I had to say, but I guess I understood. I couldn't have picked two majors that were any further apart than Art Design and Pre-Law. "Kelly, can I ask how much success you've had looking in either area. And what do you think the trouble is?" Again, I had laugh, "Vivian, I think I know exactly what my problem is, but there's not a good way to solve it. When I started going to the job fairs, I went in boy mode. I even bought a new suit, so I'd look as professional as possible. But it didn't get me far. I ended up looking like a 14-year-old getting ready for his first date. I never got to the point where anyone was taking me seriously. So now, for the last three job fairs, I've come in girl mode and I've had a little better luck. But even at that, I haven't had any offers. A few interviews were granted, but even during them, it's been tough. I even had one person tell me he felt like he was interviewing his little sister. Needless to say; no offer there. I'm more than a little disappointed." Vivian gave me her best sad and sympathetic look and then smiled and laughed. "Kelly, I'm not laughing at you, but you have to admit, it's an interesting situation. No matter how you present yourself, these people are going to see you as what they perceive you to be. It's not fair, but it's life, and let's face it girl you've got that sweet 16 and never been kissed look working for you." I guess I must have hung my head and looked sorrowful because she immediately apologized. "Kelly, I'm not trying to be mean, as a matter of fact you should take it as a complement. You are absolutely adorable, and if I didn't already know you're 21, I would have guessed 16 as well. It may be a bit of a hurdle right now, but at some point, it's going to have its benefits. But for now, I have an idea to make it up to you. Remember, I mentioned a position available at my office, well I think if you're interested, I can probably guarantee you'll get an interview, probably with the senior partner... and since the senior partner happens to be my father, I might just be able to sway things in your favor. It really is a great job, and the salary's not bad and it'll give you someplace to establish yourself until the right thing comes along." IV As it turned out, the job with Vivian's firm was great. Clark, Rogers and Bellows had been started by her grandfather and his two best friends and had just celebrated their 50th anniversary. Her father, Grant, was indeed the senior partner, and Vivian had joined the firm three years ago when she graduated from law school. I found the research side of things interesting and challenging. You never knew what kind of project would be assigned, so every day was different. For the next six months, I worked hard and saved money to get myself established. Thanks to my parents, I didn't have major college debt and I was already dreaming about getting those loans paid off. I had a cute little apartment, bought a nice used car and was really getting settled in my life. The only thing that was missing was someone to share it with. Since I was living full time as Kellie, I was uncomfortable with the bar scene but didn't have a better option to meet anyone. I thought about going out as Kelly, but when I tried, I still suffered from looking like a 14-year-old, and even if they accepted my ID and I got into the club, I didn't stand much of a chance of meeting anyone. I must have been sending out signals of despair, and Vivian picked them up. She told me things would get better and teased me about needing to decide whether I want to meet the right guy or right girl. When I responded saying I was in no condition to be picky she laughed and asked, "Well what do you think about a date with the Junior Associate of an up and coming law firm?" Complete shock would be an understatement of what I was feeling. "You're kidding right. Is this a sympathy date thing or something like that? Because if it is, although I appreciate your offer, I don't want it on that basis. I mean you're smart and beautiful and sophisticated and all of the other things I find attractive, but I don't want you feeling sorry for me." "Kellie, trust me, that's the last thing on my mind. I know it seems strange, but I could say the same things about you. You're smart, cute and I think sophisticated fits as well. It's a great combination and I think you are all together attractive. I guess in some ways I was attracted to you from that first weekend. You were in the worst possible situation, yet you maintained control. You were being treated unfairly from all directions, yet you maintained your composure as well as anyone could. I was impressed." "So, who are you so impressed with Kelly the boy, or Kellie the girl? I mean where do we start and where do you see this going? I guess I'm still more than a little confused." She seemed to have thought this out, so I wasn't surprised that she had a plan. "Well tomorrow's Friday, so why don't we just plan on drinks after work, and if we feel like it maybe dinner. That will allow us both to relax and unwind and get to know each other better. How's that sound to you?" "Amazing!" The word slipped out before I knew it, and I felt embarrassed and blushed furiously. But apparently, Vivian was OK with that answer. "That pretty much sums up my feeling as well. We'll start off with Kellie the girl and spend some time getting to know each other. Then, when we both feel the time is right you can bring out the boy Kelly and re-introduce me." Friday evening drinks did turn into dinner and then Vivian and I walked through the park continuing to talk. Our conversation flowed easily and was comfortable for both of us. While there was no subject that was off limits, we both respected each other's private lives. Since I used public transportation back and forth to work, I didn't have my car to worry about. When we both finally wound down for the evening, Vivian gave me a ride back to my apartment. It felt a little awkward when she walked me to the door, but she knew how to handle it. She thanked me for the evening, and then moved closer and kissed me on the cheek. Her soft lips lingered for a mere second, but the impact was incredible. When we parted, she gave my hand a squeeze and turned to walk to her car, and as I watched, I could feel something stir inside of me, something real that I had never felt before, and it was wonderful. Monday at work nothing was said between Vivian and me. I had gone into work anticipating some sort of major change in our relationship, but instead life had reverted to what it had been. I was confused, and I was saddened. Although we saw each other only briefly during the day, I was expecting something, but it was business as usual. The next two days, Vivian was out of the office and I was left to wonder. Was one night out for cocktails and dinner enough to push her away? I struggled through the days and moped around the apartment at night considering turning in my resignation and taking up my parents offer on returning home to find a job there. Thursday morning, I was still feeling down. I had arrived at the office early to finish up a project for one of the partners and was sitting in the break room enjoying a cup of coffee when Vivian walked in. "Good morning sunshine." And I immediately perked up. "Missed you this week. I've been so wrapped up in on a project, I've not been thinking about much else." She poured herself a cup of coffee and sat down across from me and reached out to touch my hand, causing my heart rate to jump. It was still early, and we had the room to ourselves, but still needed to be careful. Appearances counted for a lot, and we didn't want rumors to start. We talked a little about our weeks and soon it was time to get back to work. We headed to the door, and almost as an afterthought, she asked, "Do you have an evening gown?" and before I could answer, she was headed down the hall. Twenty minutes later, I was sitting at my desk and Vivian called. "I didn't get your answer earlier; do you have an evening gown?" I tried to act innocent and hurt and to be coy, and in a small sad voice, I said, "No, I've never needed one." Vivian laughed at my attempt, and it made me smile as well, "OK, I can understand that, but you need one now. Meet me in my office at eleven; we're taking the afternoon off to shop." And she hung up. I tried to call her back, and she didn't answer. I even walked down the hall past her office, but she wasn't there. I had the feeling she was hiding from me. I returned to my cubicle, and quickly finished the research I was doing. I printed all the documents and put them in a security envelop then headed across the office to deliver them to the attorney who was waiting. On the way back, I detoured past Vivian's office again, but she still wasn't there. I was just going to have to wait. It was eleven on the dot when Vivian walked around the corner of my cubicle. "Grab your purse girl, we'll get lunch and then we've got the whole afternoon to shop." I shut down my computer, grabbed my purse and followed Vivian to the elevator. I waited until we were out of the building before I asked. "So why do I need an evening gown?" Knowing that she had something planned, "I never go anywhere formal, so I don't know why I need one." We were getting in her car and she looked across at me smiling, "Well you do now." But she wouldn't say anything else until we'd driven six blocks and arrived at Casidy's an upscale Bistro where I'd never considered eating. From what I heard, an appetizer would set me back half a week's pay. Once we were seated, and before we even asked, we were served sparkling water with a slice of lime, and a glass of white wine. The waiter stopped by and explained what the lunch specials were, and Vivian ordered without even asking me. "Trust me, you'll love it. It's a chicken scaloppini with whole grain linguini and artichoke Alfredo sauce." It sounded good, but I'd never tried anything with artichokes in my life. I guess it was about time I did. "OK, I've allowed myself to be kidnapped from the office, taken to a restaurant I couldn't afford in my dreams, and told I need to buy an evening gown. Why do I get the feeling that I'm being set up for something?" This caused her to laugh, and I was glad to see that. "Don't be so suspicious girl. I'm just looking out for your best interest. There's a charity ball Saturday evening and all the partners at the office and a few other chosen ones are invited, and my daddy made sure I was invited, and my invitation says plus one... and you're the one. That's why you need an evening gown." By this time, our lunch had arrived, and further discussion was put off while we ate. We were served Champagne Ice for desert and while we enjoyed the cold refreshing flavor, Vivian started in again. "What kind of gown do you think you'd like? Have you ever dreamed about or fantasized about wearing a gown? Do you have a style in mind, or a color?" Now I was really lost. Had I ever thought about wearing an evening gown? Yes! But the closest I had ever come was cocktail dresses for my cousin's weddings. This would be a whole new experience, and I figured the best course of action would be to let Vivian lead and go with the flow. Whatever I had expected the afternoon of shopping to be, it was all of that and more. I had assumed that we would head to a bridal shop, or one of the formalwear shops at the mall, but I should have known better. Instead, we drove up town to a specialty store that I had seen before but had only a slight idea of what they sold. The Elegant Lady occupied the entire first three floors of the First and Market building. The building dated back to 1927 and was one of the premier locations in the city. I was surprised when Vivian didn't turn into one of the nearby parking lots, but pulled up in front of the main entrance, but I should have guessed; valet parking. Once inside, we were greeted by the concierge, who verified our appointment and then showed us to a comfortable sitting area to wait for our sales associate. She served us tea and brought a small tray of fruit. It was obvious that Vivian had planned this for a while; I don't think even she could arrange an appointment here on the spur of the moment. Vivian had a smile of self-satisfaction on her face as we sat sipping tea. "Have you given any thought to style or colors yet? You've had a while to think it over; I would think you'd be full of ideas." But I wasn't. I was still in some sort of a state of shock. The last thing I would have thought of this morning was being in a store like this shopping for an evening gown. Yet, here I was. I decided my best play was to put some pressure back on her and see where that got me. "I want something very striking, something that makes a statement. Maybe very fitted with a daring neckline and a slit right up to my hip. And no soft subtle colors, emerald green or sapphire blue with some sequins or embellishments. What do you think?" It worked. Vivian's eye opened so wide that she couldn't hide the shock, but I wasn't able to keep a straight face. We were both still laughing when our sales associate arrived. Her name was Shelly and she and Vivian apparently knew each other as they embraced like old friends. Shelly was probably in her thirties and had classic beauty, a very Audrey Hepburn look. Her face was perfectly made up and the suit she wore fit like it had been custom tailored, which I'm sure it had. "So, Vivian, I assume this is the young lady in desperate need of a dress. What's the occasion, prom or wedding perhaps? And there it was again, she had taken one look at me and made an assumption about my age. Vivian could see the look on my face, upset, but not mad. Probably more disappointed than anything else. "Shelly, I'm sorry I didn't explain. This is Kellie, and she's new to the office. We're both invited to the Tyler Funds Charity Ball this Saturday and we need to find her a dress. She was telling me earlier that she had her heart set on something classic and classy with just the right amount of sexy; something in a bold color." Now it was my turn to be shocked. Vivian had put it in perfect terms to make sure I was properly attired. And before I knew it, I was being whisked away searching through racks of dresses. Shelly was pulling dresses for me to evaluate as was Vivian and for the most part I was back in a state of shock. It was all very surreal. I would see the dress and before I could render judgment Vivian would say yes or no or maybe. It took about twenty minutes to select the first group of dresses, eight in all, is various styles and colors. It took another 40 minutes for me to try them on while Vivian and Shelly decided which to keep and which to let go. There were two that remained in the dressing room and the others went back to the racks. Once we were through with this group, the process started over again. This time, we selected eight more dresses and I picked four of them. Then, it was back to the dressing room to try them on. This time when I was done modeling, we had kept three dresses, and two were ones which I had chosen. For a third time, I did a private fashion show for the girls and we narrowed the choices to two. The first dress we kept was red sheath made from hammered satin. It was strapless with a princess neckline and a snug fitting bodice. It had a natural waistline and the skirt flared slightly from there ending in a sweep hem. There were two patterns of crystals that were sewn in a floral pattern at the left side just above the waist. There was also a small lace jacket that served to soften the neckline but also drew more attention to my cleavage. All in all, it was a beautiful dress and fit like it was made for me. The second dress was one that I had initially selected. It was royal blue in a fit and flare style that Shelly referred to a semi mermaid. The dress consisted of an under slip made from rayon satin with the over dress made from raw silk that was thin enough to have a semitransparent quality. The dress had a modified princess neckline with the silk over dress being extended upwards into straps with cap sleeves. The bodice was tightly fitted and clung to my every curve. The snug fit continued to my knees and then flared into a dramatic sweep. Modeling this dress for the second time, I realized how the tightness caused me to shorten my stride creating a sexy wiggle when I walked. Although I wasn't too sure about this, I think this is what pushed Vivian to decide this was the dress. And when I saw how excited she was, I couldn't disagree. Before I knew what was going on, Shelly had called in a seamstress, Marty, to do a fitting and plan any alterations on the dress. She surprised me when she suggested taking in the bodice from just below my breasts to under my waist. I started to protest, but Marty just smiled, "Once we get you laced into a proper corset, you'll be thanking me." I turned to look at Vivian, but she just smiled and waved while pulling her credit card out to pay for the dress. I ask her several times that evening what she paid for the dress, but she refused to let me know. "It's my treat. I don't often get to spoil someone I care about!" And that thoroughly set my head spinning. Eventually, I would find out that Vivian paid $425.00 for the dress, but I never let her know that I knew; and as to how I found out, well that's my secret as well." Friday after work, I was back at the dress shop for a final fitting and to pick up the dress. Shelly handed me the corset before taking me down to the dressing room and I blushed furiously. "Don't worry; it's not as bad as you think. Just slip it on, reach back and pull the ties to snug it up, then call Marty, she'll come in and tighten it for you. Then she'll get the dress on you and make sure it fits perfectly, we don't want Vivian to be disappointed... do we?" To say the least, wearing the corset was interesting. When I pulled it snug, it felt a bit restrictive, but it was not uncomfortable. If I moved too much or too quickly, and especially when I tried to bend, I could feel the steel boning holding me firmly in place, and the half cups pushed my breasts up to places they'd never been before. But that was nothing compared to when Marty tightened it. "Raise your arms above your head, take a deep breath and exhale completely." I did, and before I could say a word, she pulled on the laces with incredible force, and even though I thought I had exhaled as much as possible, another gasp of breath escaped from my lungs. Marty tied off the laces, but only temporarily as she walked around inspecting the position and fit of the corset. She pointed out a bar above my head hanging from two small chains attached to the ceiling. "Reach up and grab the bar with both hands. You may need to stand on your toes, but that's OK. Just hang on while I make one small adjustment to the laces. Now one more big breath, in and out, that's a girl." Apparently, Marty's small adjustment included breaking several of my ribs and causing my spine to touch my belly button. When she pulled the laces this time, I was sure I couldn't take another breath if my life depended on it, which I was quite sure it did. I was sure I was turning blue and probably purple by the time she was finished tying the laces and hiding them with a small panel along the length of the corset. Finally, when she was satisfied, Marty had me let go of the bar. "Push up as far as you can on your toes first. Then let go of the bar and let yourself down slowly. Trust me you don't want to go too fast... it might pinch a bit." "Pinch a bit... holy crap!" I tried to let myself down slowly, but my ankles didn't cooperate. And when my heels hit the floor, I bounced right back up on my toes. I played this down and up game several more times before I could stand there panting like a dog, taking short breaths to ease the blue out of my face. I looked at Marty, pleading with my eyes that she would take pity on me, but she was having none of it. "OK girl, enough whining; once we get this dress on you, you'll be amazed, and the only ones doing any panting are going to be the guys at the ball tomorrow when you walk in the room. Besides, you'll be wearing 5-inch heels, so it will be like standing on your toes all night. That will take some of the compression out of the corset, and, your feet will hurt so much you won't even think about the corset." Marty was still laughing as she helped me into the dress. When she was done, she loaned me a pair of shoes and led me to the three-way mirror, so I could see myself. I stood there staring, not believing what I was seeing. Not only did the corset pull in my waist, it pushed up my breasts creating a deep cleavage I didn't think possible. If I didn't know it was my reflection in the mirror, I would be lusting at the girl standing there. Just as Marty was smoothing the dress in place, and pronouncing it perfect, I heard a wolf whistle from behind me. I looked in the mirror and could see Shelly standing behind me. "Oh girl, those curves are going to be dangerous. Guys are going to be tripping over themselves admiring your figure. I don't know what Vivian wants to accomplish, but if it's making you the center of attention, I think it's going to work. She's going to need to hire a body guard to keep the boys in line." I was caught swimming in a pool of emotions. I looked in the mirror again and still couldn't believe what I saw. Shelly was right, I might need a body guard. Is that what she wanted? Is that what I wanted? When Shelly was satisfied that everything about the fit of the dress was perfect, Marty helped me out of it, and she carefully unlaced me from the corset. "We can't let you go all at once; if we do, I guarantee you'll pass out. I've seen it happen before, so we'll let you out in three steps." Another 20 minutes passed just getting me out of the corset. When I was finally released, Shelly handed me an envelope containing a card from Vivian. "Kellie, I'm positive Shelly has made sure your new dress is perfect for you, and I can't wait to see you in it... but, I want the anticipation to last, and for you to experience the joy of being completely pampered as you prepare for the ball. So, here's what your schedule is for tomorrow." I unfolded the enclosed sheet of paper, and not surprising, even it was special. The paper itself was made from pressed linen, dyed a delicate shade of dusty rose and scented with lavender. The text was printed in a classic calligraphy script. It was meant to not only be a memo, but a keepsake as well. I stood and read what was written there, already overwhelmed by the experience. I couldn't imagine what else she had planned. "My Sweet Kellie; prepared to be pampered just like Cinderella going to the ball. Relax this evening to get ready for your big day, I suggest luxuriating in a sudsy bubble bath with a glass or two of wine. Sleep well and dream of the day to come. I suggest a light breakfast and then dress in something comfortable. I have scheduled a full day for you at the spa to help you feel like a true princess." "I have a driver scheduled to pick you up at 9AM. He will safely deliver you to Belle Claire Spa were the pampering will be carried out. I have planned everything, so all you must do is relax and enjoy as you experience skin care treatments, a soothing massage, and relaxation therapy followed by hair care treatment and styling and a full makeover. When you're done, Shelly and Marty will be there to help you get dressed for the ball. By that time, I am sure you will be perfectly gorgeous, and I'll be there with the driver to whisk you away." "Our first stop will be a romantic dinner for us to share. It will give me a chance to show you off in public and for you to rid yourself of the last-minute jitters before the ball. Then it will be off to the country club where we will make a grand entrance sure to garner the attention of everyone there and stop the hearts of more than one of the eligible bachelors. But not to worry yourself my dear; no matter how hard they may try to steal you away, you are mine and only mine." The note blew my mind. Vivian had gone all out to make this a special treat for me, and I am assuming for her as well. I knew our relationship was growing into something special, but this was way beyond my expectations. V When I left the dress shop, I immediately pulled out my cell phone to call Vivian, but it was in vain. The cell went straight to voice mail, so she was either on the phone, probably with Shelly, or had it turned off. I decided that my best bet was to do as she suggested get dinner, and then head home and get a good night's sleep. I decided to forgo fast food and returned to my apartment. I reheated some chicken noodle soup I had made earlier in the week and ate it along with some cheddar cheese and whole grain biscuits. I added a glass of red wine to help me relax. I thought about calling Vivian again, but decided not to. I decided to play along with her game and headed to bed early trying to get some added rest, but sleep would not come easy. I tossed and turned for a while before deciding another glass of wine might help. As it turned out, the wine did help, but I fell asleep on the sofa. Sometime around two in the morning I woke up and made my way into bed and fell back to sleep dreaming of what evil plans Vivian had in mind for me. I awoke a little before seven, not waiting for the blare of the alarm. I still had fragments of my dreams haunting me, and although I couldn't remember them clearly, I remember it being something about Vivian embarrassing me at the ball. I put these thoughts behind me as quickly as I could, letting them fade, and concentrated on getting myself ready for the day. I had decided to save the bubble bath until morning, so after coffee and toast, I filled the tub with warm water and sudsy bath salts and settled in with bubbles right up to my chin. I warmed the water twice before deciding to pull myself loose of the warm embrace of the bath. Once out of the tub and dried, I checked my legs and underarms, and everywhere else for signs of stubble. Even though everything felt soft and smooth, I ran the razor over every square inch, just to be sure. Knowing I was heading to the spa, I dressed in a simple beige panty and bra set, a comfy jogging suit, soft crew socks and my running shoes. I didn't figure on doing any strenuous exercises while at the spa, but this was something quick and comfortable. True to her word, the car arrived promptly at nine. It was just a taxi, but I really wasn't expecting anything extravagant at this point. I grabbed my purse and headed out the door. The Belle Claire Spa was housed in a turn of the century building in a gentrified section of the downtown business district which had been undergoing renovations for the past several years and was quickly becoming the "got to be" location for an eclectic array of boutiques and shops. The taxi pulled up in front of the building just as the ornate open sign in the window lit up, glowing in bright colors of neon. I made my way through the front door and was immediately greeted by the cute blond sitting behind a classic cherry reception desk. "You must be Kellie. We were told you would be here early. Welcome to Belle Claire, I'm Shannon. Have a seat in the waiting area and I'll let Madeline know you're here. Would you care for coffee or cappuccino or tea? There're fresh pasties over near the coffee pot. I think we have some honey cinnamon muffins this morning. They're great, whole grain and low fat, and totally addictive. Make yourself at home, I'll be right back." And she hurried out of the room. I was pretty sure she'd already over dosed on caffeine and honey cinnamon muffin. I made my way over to the coffee area and decided to forgo anything fancy and selected herbal tea. I did pick up one of the muffins but broke it in half deciding half the calories would be OK and fearing what would happen later when Marty laced me into the corset if I had gained a single ounce. I settled into one of the comfortable overstuffed chairs in the waiting area enjoying the tea and muffin. I was just to the point of checking for crumbs, when Shannon returned followed by a somewhat older lady who I assumed was Madeline. Shannon returned to her station by the front door while Madeline moved to greet me. "Hi Kellie, I'm Madeline." And she hugged me warmly. "It looks like you have an exciting day ahead of you. We're going to get you started with a relaxing exfoliating salt scrub and then a mineral bath to rejuvenate your skin. Then, you'll have one of our ultimate massages followed by a soak in a fragrant oil bath. After a short lunch break, you'll have time for a nap, and then the afternoon will be dedicated to beauty. You'll have a cleansing facial treatment, and rejuvenating lotion rub followed by a brow shaping. After that, you meet with Michelle, our stylist who'll work out a plan for your hair. When she's done her magic, you'll be turned over to Lisa who will help with your makeup, and by the time she's finished, Shelly will be here to help you get dressed. A lot to do, so if you don't have any questions, let's get you started." And off we went. I was hurried off to a changing room where I was provided with a tiny pair of panties and a robe. Once I changed, I was led off to a large bath which appeared have been transported directly out of the Arabian Nights. The next four hours were totally heavenly. By the time they brought in my lunch I had been scrubbed, tubbed and rubbed to a complete state of relaxation. Lunch consisted of a mixed vegetable salad, a fresh fruit cup with melon and berries and a large glass of peach nectar with some Champagne added just to help me relax. Immediately after the much-needed nap, I sat down with the hair stylist to discuss what I wanted for my hair. In the end, she had much better ideas than I did, so I allowed her to dictate the style. The only condition I put on it was it had to be something that took ten minutes or less in the morning when I was getting ready for work. "I don't mind spending the time for an evening out, but every morning needs to be a quick brush and done." Three hours later, my hair was perfect. Michelle had been right all along, and I was glad I had trusted her. She had lightened my base color two shades and then added three colors of highlights. She brushed it straight and then tapered the cut from front to back while layering it, causing it to lay flat. This met my daily styling requirements but was only the beginning of what she planned for the evening. First, Michelle wet my hair down adding styling gel and then proceeded to wrap, twist and wind it into an ornate up do. She added a jewel covered comb which helped to hold everything in place. Michelle finished just in time to hand me off to Lisa for makeup. For the next ninety minutes, she worked on my face, first trying several looks and blends of colors until she was satisfied. Then she cleaned everything off my face and started over explaining each product and each step of the application. And when she was done, all I could do was stare at the reflection I saw in the mirror. Amazing, awesome, incredible were all understatements. She had truly worked magic. I was pulled out from under the spell that held me by Madeline. "OK Cinderella, time to finish getting ready for the ball. Shelly and Marty are here with your dress, and I'm just dying to see you in it." Before I could respond, I was being led into a dressing room and handed the panties and corset. Once I had the panties on, and the corset loosely in place, Marty joined me and started the tightening process. She tightened it in three steps, allowing me to take a few breaths and relax between tightening. The last time she pulled on the laces, she had me stand on my toes and reach my arm above my head and stretch while she pulled them tight and tied them off. When I put my arms down and stood flat footed I felt like my ribs would break and lungs collapse. Marty helped me to a chair and to sit, which helped a little. "I think we gained another half an inch. You're going to look fantastic. Now stretch those pretty legs out and I'll help you with your stockings." Marty rolled the stockings up my legs and then had me stand while she attached them to the garters. Then I stepped into my shoes, and with the five-inch heels they took a little pressure off my waist. Then it was Shelly's turn as she brought in my dress. With Marty's help, she lowered it over my head and allowed it to slide into place. When she pulled up the zipper, there was no resistance as the dressed molded itself to my body. We added small pads to top of the corset just to make sure the dress was properly filled out. I looked down to see my cleavage which I knew would be prominent, but what I saw, took my breath away, at least the little breaths I could still manage. I thought that I was ready to go, but Madeline had returned with a few extras. There was a pair of chandelier ear rings with pale blue stones and a matching necklace that trailed down to dangle invitingly just above my cleavage. There was also a crystal bracelet with the same blue stones with three attached trailing groups of stones that lay across the back of my hand and attached to a matching ring. On my other hand, she placed another ring that was simple in design but held a large dark blue multifaceted stone that shone like it was lighted from inside. Again, I stood in front of a full-length mirror taking in my reflection. The jewelry served to add just the right amount of sparkle to finish off the outfit. As I stood there totally taken in by my reflection, Shelly came up next to me holding a spray bottle and enveloped me in a cloud of soft, sweet smelling perfume. "It's called 'Essence of Love'; Vivian selected it especially for you. Perhaps she's sending a message." I didn't have a chance to respond as Madeline was there to hurry me off to the front of the store. "Vivian's here to pick you up, so stand right here behind this screen. When she comes in for you, I'll ask you to step out and make your entrance. I can't wait to see the look on her face." I stood behind the screen which separated the lobby from the coffee area, nervous as a school girl on her first date. I don't know why I felt that way, but my nerves were completely on edge. Vivian and I had been developing a kind of a relationship, and I wasn't sure where this was leading or what I expected, but I sensed this was an important step. I waited patiently, while I listened to Madeline and Shelly talking with Vivian. I couldn't make out what they were saying, but finally, I heard Madeline say, "Kellie dear, your date is here; why don't you come out and join us." Nervously, I placed one foot in front of the other taking the small steps required by the tightness of the corset, the dress and the height of the heels. I rounded the corner and took two steps into the lobby area stopping when I saw Vivian's eyes begin to look me over. Her mouth formed words she could not utter, and challenged me, so I did a stylish pose and then a slow turn, so she could see me from all angles. When I was done, I again struck a pose and waited for her to respond. If I thought I was going to have to wait long, I was wrong. Vivian squealed and launched herself at me. Suddenly her arms were around me hugging me tight to her. When she finally let go and stepped back there was a hint of a tear in her eye, "If I wasn't worried about smearing lipstick all over your face I'd be kissing you madly. You're gorgeous, my God look at those curves... and look at that cleavage! I can't believe... I knew how beautiful you were, and I just wanted to see it all brought out. Well, I've certainly got my money's worth." I had no answer for this and felt myself tearing up but managed to pull myself together. Vivian wasn't ready to wait for me to deal with my emotions any further. She took me by the hand and led me towards the door. Madeline stepped forward and handed me a dark blue clutch purse which she assured me had "everything you need" inside. Outside the spa, a white stretch limo complete with a chauffeur wearing a tux waited for us. Vivian had really gone all out for the evening. We settled into the back seat to find glasses of Champagne already waiting for us. There were slices of sweet strawberries in each glass for added flavor. Vivian toasted to my beauty and I returned the toast to her. Then we were on our way. It only took 20 minutes to reach the restaurant and I shouldn't have been surprised by Vivian's choice. La Maison Blu was one of the finest and possibly the most elegant restaurant in town. Their service was impeccable, and it started the moment we exited the limo. There were two young men dressed in elegant tuxedos who offered their arms to escort us into the restaurant and to our table. Once they had us seated, they thanked us for the privilege, bowed, and took their leave. Vivian and I had a giggle fit over the treatment and we were just getting ourselves under control when the ma?tre de arrived, bringing menus and a wine list. "Good evening ladies. Welcome to La Maison Blu. I'll leave the menus for you to look through and your waiter will be here shortly. I'll leave the wine list, but I'll have our Sommelier stop by as well. If there's anything you need, please let me know." From that point forward, Vivian took charge of the dinner; she wouldn't even allow me to pick up the menu. "I've got it all worked out already. The head chef is a client, and he owes me a favor or two. So, he's agreed to prepare a magnificent meal for us tonight. He said to just trust him, so that's what we're going to do." True to his word, the dinner was magnificent. It started with seafood bisque topped with garlic curls with shredded Livarot cheese. The main course was an array of sliced beef tenderloin topped with a mixed vegetable compote with chopped shrimp and scallops with an Asian sweet glaze. For desert, the waiter brought out tiny cups of Cr?me br?l?e, topped with slices of dark red tart cherries. Fortunately, the portions were very small, so even with the tightly laced corset, I was able to enjoy the full meal. With everything as wonderful as it was, I would have been devastated to miss any part of it. But even then, when we stood to leave the restaurant, I had to deal with the overfull feeling in my belly. Vivian giggled, knowing what I was going through, but not showing a bit of sympathy. As we exited the restaurant, the limo was waiting for us. We sat back in the soft comforting luxury of the seats, sipping Champagne that once again had been poured for us. It was a short ride to the country club where the ball was being held, and I took advantage of the limo seats to support me in a position that took a bit of the load off my back. All throughout the ride, Vivian kept up a quiet conversation. She would ask me how I felt, and then tell me how sexy I looked and that was how I should feel. For my part, I still didn't want to take a deep enough breath to answer her. Leave it to Vivian, to have everything planned to suit her desires. In this case, we arrived just at the right moment to make a grand entrance. Most of the other attendees were already there, and she timed us walking down the wide curving stairway just as the band was between songs. It was like there had been some sort of signal given, and almost everyone turned as we wound our way down the stairs. The rest of the evening at the ball was amazing and passed in a blur. Vivian introduced me to at least a hundred people, and then there was the entire group from the office, all the partners and attorneys from the office with their husbands, wives, girlfriends and boyfriends. I knew her father well from the office, but now would meet her mother. She was quite beautiful and charming, and it was easy to see from where Vivian got her looks. While Vivian engaged in discussions with various other attorneys, I was shuffled off dancing with those who were not so engaged. There were a lot of questions asked of Vivian about her choice of dates, but she just shrugged it off, "We're just really good friends, and since I couldn't find a gentleman to escort me, I was lucky Kellie agreed." It was almost two AM when the ball started breaking up. The band played their last song and Vivian held me close as we danced. Finally, we made our way outside, and I assumed to the waiting limo, but that wasn't what Vivian had in mind. She took me by the hand and we walked along the sidewalk. "I got us a room at the Palisades... I didn't think you'd mind." The rest of the night was amazing. When we got to the room, Vivian was like a crazed woman. She couldn't wait to get both of us out of our gowns and then crawl naked into bed together. We made love twice before we both gave up to exhaustion. The first time, our passion was wild and untamed both of us quenching a thirst that had been growing. But the second time, it was soft, gentle and tender and it seemed to last forever. And when we were done, we simply fell asleep in each other's arms. VI We slept in on Sunday until noon. I awoke with Vivian kissing me gently. I was in a daze, and fighting to sort out my emotions, but Vivian was going to have none of that. "Time to get your act together girl. I'm starving, and we need to get something to eat." And suddenly it occurred to me that I had nothing to wear. But I should have known better. Vivian was standing next to the bed wearing a jeans skirt and sweater and deposited a similar bundle of clothes on the bed next to me. "Get your butt in the shower before I decide to have my way with you again and we starve to death." An hour later, we were sitting in a small caf? enjoying a light lunch and talking about last evening. I was still more than a bit confused, but Vivian seemed to have it all sorted out. "I've been waiting to do that for weeks and just needed to find the right time and place. And I've got to say, it was worth the wait." As Vivian continued, I sat there and blushed furiously. I couldn't believe how open she was being. For me, details of intimacy were always something shared in quiet, private moments, not openly in public. But she seemed to gain some satisfaction out of my embarrassment. Even though she kept her voice low, I still worried that other people sitting nearby would hear her. Sensing my embarrassment, Vivian changed the direction of the conversion. "You know, everyone was very impressed by you last night. Several of the partners mentioned it to me during the evening. And my mother was particularly impressed. She has always been less than satisfied with some of my friends, but thought you were quite lovely and charming. Her only concern was that the two of us came to the ball together and without dates. She's always pressing me to find a man and settle down. I think she's impatient for grandchildren." I laughed a little at that thought. "What do you think would happen if she knew the truth about me? Or your father either, what would he think? I probably wouldn't have my job very long would I?" Now it was Vivian's turn to laugh. "Daddy already knows all about you. As the senior partner, he approved hiring you remember, and he had to sign off on the application and employment agreement, where it clearly states you are male. And if daddy knows, I guarantee that mother knows. You just underestimate how understanding and open minded they are. By the way, mother sent a text message this morning inviting us to dinner Tuesday evening. It's her birthday, and daddy is already made a reservation for four at Dante's, so I guess we can't refuse. We'll have to find you something to wear again as it's quite the high-end restaurant. I think I'll call Shelly and have her find you something. She's got all your measurements and I trust her judgment completely. I'll tell her to have it ready tomorrow evening after work. You can pick it up on your way home." I shouldn't have been surprised, but when I stopped by at Elegant Lady Monday afternoon not only was Shelly there to meet me, she had already selected three dresses which she knew would meet Vivian's expectations. So, I was hustled off to the dressing room to try them on and offer my opinion, as if that carried a lot of weight. The first dress was a classic little black dress, cap sleeves with a modest neckline, the skirt flared slightly ending just above the knees. While it fit perfectly, I wasn't convinced it was right for a birthday party even at Dante's. The second dress was red, strapless and very fitted. The skirt fit snug to my thighs again ending above the knees. Again, I thought it a bit too much. But the third dress turned out to be perfect. It was emerald green satin with a modest neckline that plunged just slightly. The sleeves ended above my elbows and the skirt fit sung at my waist and hips before flaring a bit to the hem almost four inches above my knees. While the skirt might have been a bit short, the dress just felt right, and when I stepped in front of the mirror, this dress looked perfect. And Shelly couldn't agree more. "That dress couldn't look better on you. With your auburn hair and green eyes, the color is amazing on you. I think Vivian will approve. Now, let's head over to the lingerie department, I think we have the perfect panty and bra set for this dress." The lingerie that Shelly choose did turn out to be perfect, just as she said, but a bit scandalous. The bra was a balconette style fashioned from satin and lace that pushed my budding breasts up to new heights. The panties exactly matched the bra and to make things more interesting, there was a matching garter belt. This time, at least, there would be no corset! Shelly neatly packaged the lingerie in a lovely box and placed the dress in a protective bag. I thanked her and was ready to leave when she told me otherwise. "Vivian asked me to take you to do a little more shopping. You're going to need shoes and jewelry to finish off this outfit. And I know just the right stores to find exactly what you'll need. Over the next hour, Shelly and I visited Max Milan's shoes, and Helen & Deb's jewelry. Apparently, Vivian had accounts at both stores, and Shelly made sure we took full advantage. After trying several pairs of shoes, Shelly found a pair she was sure were perfect with the dress. They were silver strappy sandals with four-inch heels and a high ankle strap to hold them secure. I was sure I'd break my neck wearing them, but Shelly was having none of it, and before I could say anything, she had picked out a matching clutch purse. At Helen & Deb's, Shelly again knew just what she wanted. I was in shock as she chose a matching necklace, bracelet and earring set. The jewelry was crafted from silver filigree, and, set with several green stones that exactly matched the color of the dress. While the clerk packed the set in a small red box, Shelly was picking out rings. In the end, she picked a silver rope design set with a large green stone for my left hand and a silver filigree ring and single wrap pinky ring for my right hand. When we were finally done, the clerk handed me a red and silver bag and a copy of the receipt. Shelly quickly reached out and grabbed the receipt, but not before I saw a number that was more than 3 months' salary for me. Shelly saw the shock on my face and cut me off before I could say a word. "Don't worry, she can afford it, and she gave me strict instructions on what kind of things to buy. She said something about wanting to spoil you, so don't let it bother you." It was late when I finally arrived home, so I decided not to call Vivian. On Tuesday morning, I waited for her to show up, but she did not. She sent me a text around noon to say she was out of town for a court hearing and wouldn't return until late afternoon. "I'll pick you up you up this evening around seven. Dinner is at eight." I took off early to have a little extra time to prepare. With all the money Vivian had spent, I wanted to look my absolute best for her. If she was going out of her way to spoil me, I owed her at least that much. I indulged myself with a long bubble bath and carefully shaved my legs and checked closely for stray hairs anywhere else. I was lucky and never needed to shave my face but checked just in case. My nails were still prefect from the manicure just a few days earlier, so I didn't need to bother with them. I started to get dressed a full two hours early, first pouring myself a glass of white wine to steady my nerves. After lightly powdering my body, I slipped into my lingerie and added sheer silky stockings. The feel of the stocking on my newly shaved legs caused me to shiver as I attached them to the garters. I sat for a few minutes allowing myself to calm down and enjoy the wine, then moved on to work on my makeup. This was going to take most of my time, to get it just right. While I had become proficient at doing my makeup, I never tried to perfect an evening look. I wanted to look elegant for Vivian's parents and subtly sexy for Vivian. I had laid out several pictures from Vogue and Style magazines as my target and hoped for the best. It took me three tries and almost an hour before I was satisfied. By the time my makeup was done, I was ready for another glass of wine to steady my nerves. But finally, I could settle down and I finished getting dressed. Slipping into the dress and feeling the material caress my body was a sensuous experience causing me to shiver at the thrill. I sat at my vanity waiting for the goose bumps to go away and trying to decide what to do with my hair. After trying several different ideas, I decide to go with something simple. I pulled my hair up into a high pony tail, then wrapped it into a bun. I pulled a few tendrils loose at my temples and curled them with my large barrel iron and allowing them to hang down framing my face. There were twenty minutes left when I moved on to my jewelry, holding up each piece to admire it before putting on. I then stepped into my heels and carefully buckled the delicate ankle straps. I stood there looking in the mirror checking every detail to make sure everything was perfect. I had just taken my last sip of wine and sprayed myself with my Mystic perfume when I heard the doorbell ring. When I opened the apartment door for Vivian, I stepped back allowing her to enter and giving her room to look me over head to toe. She took full advantage of the space between us initially looking at me directly eye to eye, but then took an extra step back to do an overall appraisal. "Give me a twirl... let me take it all in." Then she moved forward again and took me into to her arms. She hugged me tightly and kissed me gently on the lips. "You're magnificent!" I finally had a chance to step back and take in how incredible Vivian looked. She wore a dark blue sleeveless satin dress with a lace overlay. The neckline was a modified princess design and the skirt fell just above her knees. Her hair was pulled into a French Twist with a silvery comb holding it in place. Her makeup was elegant and I'm sure the jewels in her necklace and bracelet were real diamonds. I shouldn't have been surprised when we walked out the door that there was a limo waiting for us. We slipped into the back seat and cuddled close to each other like two kids going to prom. We sipped champagne as we rode in luxury and Vivian leaned close whispering in my ear. "Tonight, is special for mother, but I want it to be special for us as well. I have grown very fond of you, and I want every minute we're together to be special." And she kissed me deeply. "Now fix your lips, or mother and daddy will know what we've been up to." Dinner with Vivian's parents was yet another new experience for me. They were accustomed to the very best in both service and the meal, and Dante's delivered on both. The restaurant itself was spectacular, nothing pretentious, just pure elegance, somewhat understated but refined and comfortable. The food was incredible, snow crab appetizers, steak Kiev over spinach noodles with grilled rice patties and of course for dessert, birthday cake. In this case, red velvet cake with champagne icing. All through dinner, Vivian's mother, Diane, made a special effort to keep the conversation light, but took every chance to find out more about me. "Kellie, Vivian tells me you moved here from the west coast for college and decided to stay. Have you adjusted to the Midwest winters yet? Do your parents ever come to visit? Or do they wish you'd move home?" I answered truthfully, admitting that while I loved the city, I still struggled through the winters. I also told her I had considered moving home when I was struggling to find a job, but I had been given a great opportunity here and was loving every minute of it. After dessert, while we were enjoying coffee, Diane pressed on with her questions, "Kellie, do your parents know about your life style and 'special situation'? I mean this isn't the kind of thing you can hide, is it? I don't mean to pry, but you are a bit of a curiosity to me. I look at you and all I see is a lovely young lady. If Grant had not told me otherwise, I would have never known." "Mother," Vivian tried to step in, "Please don't put Kellie through the third degree. Can't you see what a wonderful person she is and just accept her as that person. Why be so judgmental?" Diane sat back after her daughter's rebuke, lost for words, but I couldn't let her feel bad. I had been through a lot worse. "Mrs. Clark don't let it bother you. As a matter of fact, I'm flattered by your comments, and I understand your curiosity." And I shared my life's story with her and Grant. I gave them the abbreviated version, but enough detail to help them understand me. "Yes, my parents know everything, well almost everything. They know I spend most of my time living as a girl, but they're not aware it extends to my job. They're coming to visit next month, so I plan on telling them while they're here. I don't expect them to be surprised, they gave up on being surprised years ago. This will just be one more step as far as they're concerned." I thought the questions would end at this point, but Diane was not to be deterred. "So, for your parents, this will be just one more step." She waved her hand to indicate how I was dressed, "But what about this?" She said, waving her hand in Vivian's direction. "What will you tell them about my daughter? And as a matter of fact, what are your intentions with my daughter?" I'm not sure who was affected the most by this, me or Vivian. I wasn't sure how to respond, but Vivian jumped right in. "Mother! How dare you? I realize this is your birthday, but really? How can you be so insensitive? Kellie and I have a special relationship, and I expect you to respect that. I admit what we share is a bit unconventional, but Kellie just might be the guy... and the girl, who is perfect for me." Suddenly, the room went quiet. Although there were other discussions going on all around us, it felt like the air had been let out of the room. Grant and Diane sat back in their chairs looking at each other then turned to Vivian and finally to me. Vivian sat there with a huge smile on her face, and I was frozen in space and time. It took a few minutes before anyone could speak, and Grant was the first to find his voice. "Vivian, your mother and I are well aware of your fierce streak of independence as well as your eclectic collection of friends acquired throughout your life, but neither of us was prepared for this. That doesn't mean that we disapprove or are being judgmental, just a bit surprised. We're just getting to know Kellie, and both think she's a great girl, but the unconventional nature of your relationship is something we need some time to adjust to." Then, he turned his attention directly towards me. "Kellie, I believe you're a remarkable young lady. I use that term because that's how I've come to know you. And I have complete faith in my daughter's ability to choose wisely in her relationships. And I am sure that Diane feels the same. So please pardon our awkwardness and know that you're welcome in our family." Before he was done speaking, Diane was out of her chair coming around the table and hugging me. "I am so sorry if I offended you. I'm just a mother who worries about her daughter every day." With that, the ice quickly thawed, and everyone was smiling again. Grant ordered Irish coffee for all of us, and while we enjoyed the drinks, he pulled a small package from his jacket pocket and presented it to Diane. She carefully unwrapped the present and pulled out a small blue bag which she opened to find a gorgeous emerald ring. Grant sat there watching as Vivian and I oohed and awed looking at the ring as Diane slipped it on her finger. It allowed the evening to end on a high note. Leaving the restaurant, Vivian and I once again settled into the limo. It quickly became obvious we were headed in the direction of her condo, not my apartment. I looked at her and she smiled, but it was a timid smile like she was unsure of herself. "I thought I might convince you to spend the night. Tonight, was awkward to say the least. Let me explain it and make it up to you. Please?" Vivian and I sat in the living room of her condo to talk. She had loaned me a nightgown and she had slipped into one as well. While I was changing, she poured us each a glass of wine and we sat quietly for several minutes before she spoke. "I owe you an apology. I didn't expect tonight to turn out like it did. My mother tends to let her thoughts become her words without considering how they might affect others. She's very protective of me, probably with good reason." I sat quietly allowing her time to tell her story. There were a hundred questions I wanted to ask, but I figured she'd answer most of them if I let her continue. "While I was growing up, father was totally wrapped up with his work. He was driven to become a full partner at an early age, and he sacrificed family time to achieve it. So, it was up to mother to raise me. I didn't present her with too many challenges, at least until high school." Vivian paused to sip her wine and took a few deep breathes to steady herself before she continued. I could tell she was quite nervous and let her wait until she was ready. "I had my first real boyfriend when I was 16. It was my sophomore year and all my friends were pairing up. I felt like I had to have a boyfriend to fit in. It didn't work! Over the next year and a half, I dated six or seven guys but never felt comfortable being with any of them. Then one day late in my junior year I came home from school with my friend Julie. We walked in the house and mother was in the kitchen. I introduced her to Julie, 'Mother, this is Julie. She's my girlfriend.' And waited for what I had said to take hold. It took a minute, but when I hugged Julie close to me, mother almost fainted." Now, Vivian had my full attention, and she continued. "Julie and I became close, and she was my first sexual partner. We stayed together for the rest of the year. When prom rolled around, we decided that we should attend with separate dates. We were both asked by several guys and finally decided on our dates. I went with Charles Davis who was on the football team, and mother decided I was 'cured'. He was my second sexual partner. For the next year, I dated both girls and guys and drove my mother crazy. Father kept telling her it was just a phase, and not to worry about it and she seemed to buy into that." I knew there was more of the story yet to be told, so I sat quietly and let her continue. "I dated in college, but she never met any of them. Since I graduated, I've been totally wrapped up in my job and haven't dated much. There's a guy that mother introduced me to, the son of a friend, who she thought was perfect for me. I actually thought it might work out, and then I met you." I was shocked. Vivian moved from where she had been sitting and came over to me. She sat next to me and hugged me tightly. "When I first met you, sitting there in that jail cell I could tell there was something special about you. Why do you think I remembered you when we met at the job fair? You represented everything I was looking for in a partner. I didn't know if you were right for me, or whether you would be interested in dating an older woman, but I had to know. When you accepted the job, it allowed me to get to know you better and I began to fall in love. I know that sounds crazy, because it's only been a short while, but for the first time in my life, I'm in love!" If I was in shock before, now I was somewhere way beyond. I had been having a great time with Vivian, and she had been doing her best to spoil me and make me feel special, but this was over the top. In love, she said... in love. I couldn't even digest the words let alone the feelings and emotions. I'd never gotten past I like you a lot, a kiss and casual sex. She was the first for me in so many ways, but was I ready to be in love? Or to have someone love me? Eventually, we were both exhausted and fell into bed together snuggled up with our arms around each other. I slept well for a few hours, but then my brain took over and started imagining all the worst things possible. I replayed all my past experiences with women but substituted Vivian in their place. By 4 AM, I could take no more and slipped out of bed. I used the bathroom, then snuck into Vivian's closet borrowing a pair of jeans, a baggy sweat shirt and sneakers. I went without makeup or jewelry trying to leave before she awoke. I retrieved my keys, license, credit cards, cash and cell phone from my purse and was ready to leave. I took time to write her a short note before calling a taxi and quietly sneaking out the door. 'Dear Vivian, I'm sorry to be leaving this way, but I need some time to sort through my thoughts and emotions. In the past few months, I've grown so close to you, experiencing things in a relationship I never thought possible. You have treated me like a princess and completely spoiled me. While you have helped me to discover things about myself, I naively was not aware of your side of the relationship. Now I find myself battling to understand where we are. I don't want you to take this the wrong way, but tonight I felt like I lost something in myself as well. Please forgive me for leaving this way, call me a coward, but I could not face you until I took some time alone. Thank you for being such a wonderful person, please be patient while I find the answers and the real me.' I made it back to my apartment and threw myself across my bed, crying myself to sleep. Sometime, mid-morning, I managed to call the office and tell my supervisor I would be taking a sick day. I had barely put the phone down, when it rang. I looked at the caller ID and saw it was Vivian. I was not ready to talk, so I shoved the phone under my pillow and laid back down, falling into a fitful sleep. I stayed away from the office for the remainder of the week and even shut my phone off to avoid any outside contact. I needed time, I needed answers, and I needed to find me, and what would get me there was retreating into safe territory for me... my art. Over the past months, I had given up almost all my art time being wound up with work and Vivian. Now, I pulled out my paints and easel, my drawing paper and pencils, and settled into a part of my life where I was very comfortable. As I sorted through boxes of projects started and forgotten or maybe half finished, I managed to relax. This was safe ground for me. A place where I could go, away from the rest of the world. A place just for me. There I found something special. It began when I picked up a project I had started over a year ago, it was a series of four sketches of the same pastoral landscape in each of the four seasons. I had done the pencil sketch as part of a class project and begun to finish it as a water color. Now, I would have the chance to complete it. I was surprised by the progress I made once I had brought out my paints. My hands moved smoothly and quickly blending and layering colors bringing life to the painting. I took several breaks allowing the colors to set and dry. During these breaks, I sipped tea and let my mind wander. I wanted to figure out what was right for me. And I wanted to figure where Vivian fit in my life. By Saturday evening, I had made considerable progress on both projects. The paintings were in a rest period and would not be touched again for a few days. And somewhere along the way, I sorted out a picture of me... of the me I wanted to be, and what part I hoped Vivian would play. I had survived the week eating canned ravioli and chicken noodle soup and decided I needed something more substantial. I dug my phone out from under the pillows where it had resided for the past few days and turned it on. There were 17 missed calls and messages, all from Vivian. I ignored them, choosing to deal with them later. Instead, I called the Golden Dragon Chinese restaurant and placed an order. Hot and sour soup, orange chicken, stir fried beef and veggies, and sweet and sour pork, and fried rice, would provide several meals and allow me to stay holed up for several more days if needed. While I waited for the food to be delivered, I decided to take a shower and put on some clean clothes. I had been living in my pajamas for the last three days and needed a change. I emerged from the shower refreshed and found clean jeans and a pull over linen blouse. I slipped a thick pair of wool socks on my feet, deciding against shoes. Making my way into the kitchen, I cleared away stacks of art work I had deposited there making room for dinner. I had just finished setting out plates and silverware when the doorbell rang. I had grabbed my purse and was digging out money as I opened the door. When I looked up, there stood Vivian holding the box of Chinese food. "I met the delivery boy downstairs. I gave him a big tip to let me make the delivery." She smiled, but I could see that she was unsure of her next step. She looked down at the box and then back to me, "It looks like you've ordered enough for two... can I join you?" I stepped back, allowing her to come in and place the food on the table. I retrieved another place setting and set it on the table. I reached up grabbing glasses while asking her, "Tea or wine?" And when I turned for her answer she was right there, pulling me to her and kissing me deeply. When she let me go, I was in tears. She pulled me back to her hugging and holding me. "I've missed you terribly. I was such a fool. Please tell me you'll give me another chance?" When we finally separated, she was crying as much as I was. I wiped away her tears, and she wiped away mine, and we hugged again. It took several more minutes for both of us to relax. It was Vivian who found her voice first. "Can we talk? I owe you an apology or two, and I owe you an explanation." I agreed to talk, but insisted we eat first. "I need some real food. I've been eating out of a can for the past few days." So, we divided the food and started in while it was still hot. Judging by the way she ate, she probably hadn't eaten much lately either. When we finally settled in to talk, I had so much I wanted to say to her, but she insisted she go first. I could sense her need, so I sat back and let her talk. "I've not been very lucky in relationships. I told you some of this the other evening, but there's more to it. Most of the guys I've dated have been attorneys or other professional men. They all have one thing in common, they want to be, or need to be, or insist on, being the dominant partner. They expected me to be the sweet, submissive girl giving into their every want and desire. That's not me!" She stopped for a minute taking a deep breath and composing herself then continued. "I wanted to be in a relationship where I was an equal partner, where my needs and desires were just as important as theirs. I swore to myself when the right person came along I would never be like that. Then I met you, and what did I do? I turned into the exact person I never wanted to be. I know I've got a strong personality, but I went way overboard. I was way out of line, and I am so sorry." I couldn't let Vivian take all the blame, and now it was my turn. "Vivian it's not all your fault. Yes, you've taken the lead in our relationship, but I was more than happy letting you do it. You are the best thing that's ever happened to me. You treated me like I was someone who was truly special. I've never had anyone treat me like that and I guess I wasn't ready for it. I needed to let you know what was important to me, but I put it all aside to be with you. And then you said you loved me... and I really wasn't ready for that. I couldn't deal with it and all I knew to do was to run. So, I did. I ran back to the only other thing in the world I cared about... my art. For the past three days, all I've done is work on my art, something I haven't done since graduation, and think about you. And what I discovered is I have two loves in my life, my art and you. You have given me so much, and I have taken so willingly, and if you're ready to give me your love, I am ready to give all of mine to you." This time, it was my turn to loan Vivian a nightgown, and we crawled into bed together. We curled up in each other's arms and neither of us let go all night long. In the morning, we made love, tenderly and with passion we could now both freely express. VII Over the next few weeks, my life changed dramatically. Vivian and I pieced together our relationship in a way allowing us to become equal partners fully appreciative of each other's needs and desires. When we were together we talked, we shared, and we learned everything there was to know about each other. But we each allowed the other to have their own space. For my space, I indulged myself in my artwork. It was a renewal for me and I embraced it with vigor. I had three or four projects going on and I would move from one to another as the spirit moved me. But in the end, I returned each day to my four seasons water color. I was driven to complete it. While I pursued my passion, I could see a change in Vivian. Where in the past, she would be in the office until 7 or 8 in the evening, now she was heading out almost every night by six. She told me that she was taking on a project that she had always dreamed about, but, wasn't ready to tell me about it. "It's in the early stages. I need to get a few things done before I show you." At the office, things changed as well. I was moved from the research pool to the law library. I was given the task of updating records on a new digital data base. Where the research had been challenging, new and different every day, this job was boring and monotonous. Each day was filled with scanning documents and attaching them to the appropriate files. Then the files were sorted and arranged for ease of access. It took a lot of focus and concentration, making sure everything was properly done. At the end of each day I was mentally fatigued and ready to head home and fall into my art. Soon, I was nearing the completion of my four seasons piece. I was anxious to have it done but had a crazy idea as well. I decided I wanted to try something I had seen before, but at the time didn't understand. Now I knew why, and I wanted to try it. I knew I would never want to have this painting anywhere except on an easel. Even when it was done, it would always be a work in progress. I had a photographer come in and take a very high-resolution picture of the painting and then print two sets full size on canvas in half tone grey scale at ten percent density. What this created were ghost like images that were exact copies of my painting. These images provided a backdrop for me to paint a near duplicate of the original, one set in oils, and another in acrylics. During this time, Vivian and I still spent much of our free time together allowing our relationship to develop on a much deeper level. We quickly became equal partners even though Vivian still proceeded to treat me like a princess and spoiled me. For my part, I did everything I could to spoil her as well, and in the end, we found great balance. The next big hurdle for both of us, was my parents visit. I had not been home since the beginning of my senior year over two years ago. I'd been planning to visit, but with my focus on graduation and finding a job, it didn't happen. Now, they were coming to spend almost two weeks to get to know their daughter again, and to meet her girlfriend. I explained the situation to mother on the phone, and she did her best to accept it, but daddy couldn't understand. "You mean to say, you're living your life as a woman, and you have a girlfriend who knows all about you? Just how does that work?" My parents arrived in town on Friday evening. When I met them at the airport, they barely recognized me. I knew I had changed over the past two years, but I guess the change was more dramatic than I realized. I saw them waiting in the luggage claim area and walked up to them. "Hi mother, hi daddy." And that was all I got out. Mother looked at me, her eyes wide, "Oh my God! My little girl has become a woman." She pulled me close and hugged me tight. "Kellie, you look amazing. I love your hair, and look at how pretty you are, I almost didn't recognize you." Daddy was not as accepting. "So, Kellie, I see it's true, you are living as a girl. And you actually have a job, and an apartment and a life? I'll be damned, but I hope you're happy, and what's this your mother tells me about a girlfriend? Shouldn't you be looking for a boyfriend?" We stopped for dinner on the way to the apartment giving my parents a chance to adjust. They had grown accustom to seeing me as a girl as I grew up, especially in high school, but this was new to them. They initially acted a bit embarrassed, but once we sat down in the restaurant and started talking they seemed to grow more comfortable. By the time we were at the apartment settling in for the night, although they remained inquisitive, we were a family again. Saturday, mother was ready for some bonding time. "I think the last time we did any mother-daughter shopping was when you needed a dress for your cousin's wedding. It's high time we hit the mall. I'm sure your father will be happy here watching football on TV. Every Saturday and Sunday from September through New Year, he's glued to the TV." Mother and I hit the mall at full speed. I always thought I liked to shop, but now I remember where I got it from. We were in and out of every store in the mall, several of them twice. If I would have bought everything mother thought I should, my credit cards would have maxed out and then some. In the end, I bought a new dress, a skirt and blouse, two pairs of shoes and a purse. For herself, mother bought shoes, and a purse. When we left the mall, I noticed mother was carrying two bags I hadn't noticed. "While you were in the changing room at Macy's, I pick you out a few things. It's been years since I bought you anything... you can't deprive me of a little motherly pleasure." It was late afternoon when we left the mall, so mother decided we should have dinner and take carry out for daddy. "This is our day. I don't know why it's so important to me, I think I'm making up for missed time. I don't know why I'm telling you this now, but I never let go of believing that being a girl was just something you were going through, a phase, that one day you'd grow out of it. So, all the mother-daughter things we could have been doing, never happened." Sunday morning, I was up early making breakfast, so it would be ready when mother and daddy woke up. I had cinnamon rolls in the oven and the coffee maker was steaming away. Once I served these, I would fry some bacon and eggs. Daddy always liked a big breakfast on Sunday, and I didn't want to disappoint him. I also wanted him in a good mood since I was planning to drag him out later in the day to meet Vivian. Vivian and I had decided she should come over to my apartment where she could meet my parents and we could talk and get to know each other, but my mother had other ideas. "If we stay in, your father will have his nose buried in the TV. College football yesterday, professional today. He'll be cordial but believe me he'll hear half of what we say and offer only an occasional grunt in response." Now, the plan was to meet Vivian at her condo. She was going to make tea and coffee and we could talk a bit. Then once we got daddy comfortable with the situation, he'd be taking us all to dinner. As it turned out, daddy was easy to deal with. He was quite taken with Vivian. It started when well pulled up to her condo and left the car with the valet. Then, when I explained that her condo was on the 17th floor, he was convinced before he met her. He had a tendency to place value on status, and this hit the mark with him. Once we arrive at the condo, Vivian took things in hand and charmed daddy and quickly bonded with mother. She hugged mother warmly, "Mrs. Burke, so lovely to finally meet you," and shook hands with daddy while flashing him her bright smile, "and Mr. Burke, every bit as handsome and dashing as Kellie led me to believe." Over the next three hours, I had very little opportunity to speak. Mother and daddy wanted to hear everything, but they wanted to hear it from Vivian. And Vivian only had to ask, "What was Kellie like when she was little?" to set mother and daddy's story telling in to high gear. When dinner time rolled around, it took some effort to pull the story telling closed, so we could get headed to the restaurant, but once we were seated and dinner was ordered, mother and daddy dove right back in. Quite surprisingly, almost all the stories focused on Kellie the girl and only mentioned Kelly the boy peripherally. Not once did I hear either mother or daddy say he or him, it was only she and her. The next several days were filled with time taken to just be a family. It had been a long time since I had a chance to just hang out with mother and daddy and do whatever we felt like or didn't feel like. If we slept in, that was fine, if anyone was up early, they started coffee and made breakfast as soon as they heard anyone else stirring. Then, while we ate, we'd plan how to spend our day. We went to museums, the zoo and art galleries. And mother and I went shopping...even managing to drag daddy with us twice. Seeing the look on his face when he bought a dress for me was priceless, but he drew the line when mother and I headed into Victoria's Secret. We would stop to eat whenever we found someplace interesting and dined on everything from hotdogs or pizza for lunch to steak or seafood for dinner. We ate Italian, Chinese, Mexican, Greek, Indian cuisines and more. For most of the week, it was just the three of us. I had taken the entire week off work to allow us time to get to know each other again, and it worked wonderfully. On Saturday morning, Vivian called to catch up on the week. "I'm glad it's all working out so well. Your parents are remarkable people. Do you think they are ready to meet my parents? Mother has been asking all week. She's not stopped talking about you and how impressed she was with you when you stood up for yourself at her birthday dinner without becoming either defensive or aggressive." I was more than a little confused, because I wasn't so sure I had made a good impression on Vivian's mother, and I raised this question. But Vivian was quick to correct me. "Don't be silly. She loved you. She's even called you a sweet young girl and the best thing that's happened to me in a relationship ever. But I guess you're not accustomed to my mother's attitude. She can sometimes come across very caustic even when she likes someone. I've become used to it when she meets any new guy or girl I dated." The confusion must have been obvious, because Vivian took time to sooth my feelings. "Oh, don't worry, I should have warned you. You'll see, now that she's met you and put you through her third degree, she'll be your best friend. It hasn't been this way with most of my friends, but she really likes you. And by the way, she made reservations for the six of us this evening at Charles Shay's. I think she wants to show off a bit. She wants to treat your parents to something special. My parents were very excited about the dinner and meeting Vivian's parents. I was a little nervous and apprehensive, thinking they might not mix well. They came from different backgrounds and lifestyles and I wasn't sure what kind of chemistry would exist. As it turned out, I shouldn't have worried. Once we sat down at the table and the conversation started, it was like Vivian and I weren't there. The dinner discussions started with some general 'get to know you' conversation but quickly turned to Vivian and me. Each set of parents wanted to know everything about the two of us. It was embarrassing having to sit there and listen, and neither Vivian nor I was spared. I couldn't have asked for more from my parents visit. At the end of two weeks I had bonded with them in a way I never had before. We were closer as a family, even though we lived 2000 miles apart. When they were ready to leave for home all three of us stood there hugging and crying. When we pulled ourselves together we agreed that we needed to get together again soon, and that Vivian and I would plan a trip to California. After dropping my parents at the airport, I didn't feel like going back to my apartment. I could already feel the emptiness that would greet me there. I called Vivian, but got her voice mail, so she wasn't going to save me. Needing somewhere to go, and something to do, I finally made my way downtown to the art center. This was a place where I could just wander and let my mind drift away from the mixture of feeling and emotions flooding me. So much had happened over the past few weeks, I needed some time to absorb it all and sort it out. I had been so busy dealing with the daily events, and I wasn't sure what it all meant for the long term. It was like having all the pieces of a puzzle laying on the table and needed to fit them all together. The problem facing me was I wasn't sure what the picture was on the puzzle. Later in the evening, while I sat listening as my stereo played the soft strains of Brahms and enjoying a cup of chamomile tea, I heard my apartment door open and close softly. Then I felt Vivian's soft hands embrace me from behind, pulling me into a soft hug. The scent of her perfume enveloped me as she kissed my neck causing goosebumps to raise on my arms. Suddenly, all the emotions I had been fighting throughout the day came to the surface and tears ran down my cheeks. Vivian made her way around me, never letting go. She pulled me close reaching up to dry my tears and kissing me softly. Her words were unspoken, but I knew what she was saying, expressing her love and letting me know everything would be alright. Letting me know no matter want challenges came our way, we would face them together. When she finally let go of her embrace, she looked at me in a way that let me know she could sense every feeling and emotion with which I was dealing. "I'm sorry I didn't come sooner. I knew once your parents were gone you would be fighting emotions. They were so totally wonderful, so accepting and supportive. I feel like I'm already part of the family." For my part, I pulled Vivian close to me again, holding her tightly. "I wasn't ready for any of this. My life has so completely been turned around from where it was once headed. You've done so much for me, mean so much to me, and I have fallen so deeply in love with you. And now having my parents here for the past two weeks and becoming a family again. I'm just overwhelmed!" The events of the past weeks served to pull Vivian and me closer together and deepen our relationship. We were so completely comfortable with each other and our relationship, and day by day it just got better. During the work day, I was constantly busy with the library project and would only catch a glimpse of Vivian at lunch or when she would take a minute to poke her head in the library. It was always the same, she'd mouth the words, 'I love you', and then be headed down the hall. We had diner together several times each week and planned our weekend adventures. There was always something special to do, or someplace to be, and if there wasn't, it was special because we were together. And when we weren't together, I found renew energy for my painting. I had already been putting considerable effort into my 4 Seasons, and soon had it to the point where it would stay, at least for quite some time. While I knew it would never be, 'Done', it was at a resting point where it would remain. With this done, I pulled out a set of the prints, and set to work on them with acrylics. I debated about doing the oils first, but knew that would be a much longer process. It wasn't long before I was bumping around my apartment with eight easels occupying a majority of the space. When Vivian would stop by she would tease me about the artist hovel and me becoming a reclusive genius whose work would never be appreciated because I wouldn't allow it to be seen. And then she had a brilliant idea. "I know you're going to hate this idea. But hear me out and promise not to say no without thinking about it. "What if we displayed your water colors in the lobby of the office? We've got those oversized ugly commercial prints there now, and I'd much rather see your work displayed, and allow others to recognize your talents." It took Vivian another three weeks to convince me, but all it took was me bumping into one of the easels and knocking it over. I was lucky, it was one of the prints I had not yet touched with paint, so no damage was done. But that was it, she was right, there wasn't enough room in the apartment to have a mega art studio. Vivian arranged for a maintenance crew to remove the art work in the lobby and repaint the entire area. While that was in process I worked with a framing studio to get a display fabricated from reclaimed wood providing the perfect support and setting for the pastoral landscapes. The entire process took almost a month, because under Vivian's direction it became a complete renovation, not simply exchanging art work in the lobby. "It's all got to be perfect! I'll not have your beautiful paintings hanging on a nail in an ugly box of a room. We're going to do this right and have a room that is worthy of holding your artwork!" So, there was no compromise. More than once, Vivian had to justify the project to her father, but he always gave in. He was standing there with me and Vivian watching the new molding and trim being installed. It had been made to compliment the style and feel of the framing. He was shaking his head. "I've never been able to win a argument with her or her mother. You'd think after all the years, I would have learned." In the end, the results were nothing short of spectacular. The lobby had become a new and inviting place rather than the stuffy lawyer's waiting room it had been. During the remodeling, the lobby had been closed, with all employees and clients using the side entrance to the building. Other than me, Vivian, and her father, the only other others who had seen the room were the construction workers who had finished the remodeling work. So, Vivian convinced her father that they should host a grand reveal, and Grant was more than willing to approve. He firmly believed it was good business practice to include employees in company success and celebration and this was the perfect opportunity. The gala event was set for the next weekend on Saturday evening. Grant had decided to take the extra week to plan something special. Everyone in the firm was invited along with a guest. Additionally, Grant and the other partners invited a few of their largest clients to attend. Total attendance would be more than seventy people. Vivian had taken the lead, pulling the event together, wanting it to be elegant reveal. The invitations specified cocktail attire and described it as a champagne and hors d'oeuvres affair. The large conference room was large enough to accommodate the group and was set up with high top tables, each covered with a linen cloth and a vase of fresh flowers. Similar set ups lined the hallway leading to the lobby area. Waiters and waitresses circulated carrying trays filled with champagne and hors d'oeuvres. Grant took advantage of having the entire group together to offer thanks on behalf of the partners for the continued high performance being enjoyed by the firm. "But on this special occasion, we have the opportunity celebrate the unique and amazing talents of one of our employees. I have to admit, when the idea was first brought to me, I was skeptical, but a certain individual whom I'm sure you all know convinced me." And everyone looked towards Vivian and had a good chuckle. Continuing, Grant looked to me, "Kellie, would you please join me up front." And he gave me a minute to work my way to the front of the group. "It was brought to my attention some time ago, that this young lady is an amazing artist. And through her generosity, she has agreed to put on loan to the firm an incredible set of her original paintings to be displayed in our lobby. Now it may sound like a simple process to take down the old artwork, and hang the new, but we decided to move ahead with a complete and much needed remodeling of the lobby, something befitting the artwork now displayed there." I stood by feeling a combination of pride and embarrassment. Neither me, nor my artwork, had ever been the center of attention and these emotions were something quite new to me. I was fighting back tears as Grant place his hand on my shoulder. "Ladies and gentlemen, the artist we are here to celebrate, Ms Kellie Burke." And the room broke out in loud cheering and applause. When the noise quieted, Grant asked me to say a few words, and then lead the group to the lobby. As I looked out at the crowd, I could feel myself blush and had to search to find a few words. "Thank you so much for your kind reception. I hope you find that my art is deserving." Grant led the way to the lobby holding my hand as I was shaking. Diane and Vivian followed close behind. The lobby was not big enough to accommodate the entire group, and there would be a procession beginning with the other partners, their guests and clients, and then the remainder of the firm's employees. There was an endless stream of wonderful comments and congratulations from everyone as they came through the lobby. I felt like I was as much on display as was my art. I wasn't used to this kind of attention, and this being the first time any of my paintings were being displayed. It was so rewarding, and so stressful. For the remainder of the evening, I was the center of attention with everyone seeking me out, congratulating me and wanting to talk about my 'hidden talents'. In particular Don Warren, the CEO of Warren IntelliTech, was particularly impressed and took the opportunity several times to speak with me. Don's company was the Firm's largest client and the relationship was handled exclusively by Grant. I was standing in the lobby with Vivian as the crowd thinned, and Don came to speak with me again. What he said was straight forward, simple and took me by surprise. Vivian, standing by my side was as stunned as was I. "Will you do a commissioned painting?" And I was speechless. I had never considered that someone would want to buy my paintings, let alone commission one. "I love what you've done with these paintings. There is such great depth to them, you feel drawn into each scene, and together, they tell such a story. Just amazing! I have a home near Aspen, Colorado and enjoy the incredible views. I would love to have you immortalize the view in a series of four seasonal paintings as you have done here. Are you interested? Can we negotiate something to entice you to do it? I realize I can't steal you away and this is a long-term project. I mean you need an entire year just to observe the four seasons. But, is there any way?" I was still speechless and trying to accept that someone was willing to pay for my artwork. I had barely heard the rest of what was said, but while I was still taking it in, Vivian stepped in. "You're absolutely right, you can't steal her away." And she gave me a hug. "But I'm sure we can work out something. Why don't you take a little time, and when you've thought it through, make a proposal? You know what it's worth to you and consider the time and effort that will need to be put into the project on Kellie's part. I'm sure you understand that this isn't like hiring someone to paint your house, and your proposal will take that in account." Don smiled as he responded. "I should have known I'd be negotiating with you. I've seen the two of you together, and I commend you on stepping in before I was able to take advantage of this young starving artist." And they all laughed at his joke. "I've a good idea what something like this is worth. It's not like I'm just buying a painting hanging on the wall someplace. I'll put something together and get a proposal to you. I'm confident I can make it worth her while, and I'm sure you'll make it worth my investment." VIII After the unveiling of the new lobby, and my artwork, we made our way back to Vivian's condo. I was still in a daze. I hadn't expected the reception, and reaction, both me and my artwork received. And, on top of that, there was the incredible offer from Don Warren. While he hadn't expressed an amount, I was sure when Vivian received his proposal it would be for a significant amount. It was not unusual, when we made our way to the bedroom, for Vivian to take the lead, and tonight would be no different. "It's your night, just relax and allow me... I'm going to make you feel so good." And she slowly stripped away my clothes, losing hers along the way as well. When we were both naked, Vivian pulled me to her allowing her hands to roam freely, caressing every inch of my body. She took me by the hand and led me to the bed. After the previous night, Sunday morning started late. We woke after ten but languished in bed just hugging and cuddling. By the time we finally got out of bed and headed to the shower it was after eleven and by the time we were dressed, and ready for the day, it was after noon. I was in the mood to just stay in for the day, still feeling a bit overwhelmed by last night's events, but Vivian was having none of it. We headed out for brunch at a small caf?. Eugenia's was Vivian's favorite and we had eaten there many times. It was in an area of the city called 'Old Town' and featured houses and other buildings built between the late 1890s and the early 1930s. It had an antebellum charm that had been preserved over the years. It was an elite part of town with all the houses and shops commanding a premium price. Vivian and I had admired the houses many times, whispering between ourselves, 'Someday'. While we were served mimosa and a fruit plate with lemon custard, Vivian talked about how proud she was of me. "You handled yourself amazingly well last night. I know it had to be a bit overwhelming, but you stayed within yourself. You were you, above everything else in front of all those people you were just yourself. Nothing artificial, just the genuine article, and that's one of the many reasons I've fallen in love with you." I sat quietly, listening to Vivian talk. She was working up to something, and it was best to let her move ahead at her own pace. I could see that Vivian was enjoying every minute of the buildup, and was sure whatever it was, it would be worth dealing with the suspense. Vivian reached out and took hold of my hand. "See that house across the street." And she pointed to a beautiful Victorian house. "On its own, it's withstood the test of time and the battles with weather and neglect. But look at it now. For the past six months it's been undergoing a renovation. It's being returned to its former glory, reassuming its place in the world." I was following her but had not yet sorted out where she was going. "I've loved that house from the first time I saw it when I was still a young girl. Daddy used to tell me if I really wanted it, someday I'd be able to buy it. I always thought that was a dream, but over the last year, since I've been with you, I've learned that dreams do come true. So, to fulfill one of my dreams, six months ago, I bought the house." Now I was really in shock. "Really? You bought it? You're having it restored? That's amazing, and wonderful. Could there be a better way to make your dream come true?" Vivian was still holding on to my hand and smiled at me. There was something else she was holding back, and apparently it was time to tell me. "It's actually only one part of my dream, because I didn't buy that house for me... I bought it for us." And she reached into her purse, pulling out a small blue box, opening it to reveal a gorgeous diamond ring. "To make my whole dream come true, you'll accept this ring and agree to become my partner for the rest of our lives." With tears rolling down my cheeks, I held out my hand and allowed Vivian to slide the ring on my finger. "Are you sure?" And those were the only words I could get out, before the cheers from all the surrounding tables halted any further question. Vivian came around the table pulled me to my feet and kissed me deeply. "Does that feel like I mean it? Of course, I mean it. How could you think otherwise? Now come with me. I told the contractor we'd be there this afternoon, so I could give you the grand tour, and get your opinion on finishes and decorating. I'm sure with your artist eye, you'll see things I'd miss or never see in the first place. Come on... I can't wait to show you." After paying our bill, including a big tip for the waitress, Vivian took me by the hand leading me across the street. Just standing in front of the house and taking in the elegance of the building gave me goose bumps. It was perfect in every way. Every feature crafted in exquisite detail. The main structure of the house was painted sky blue with the majority of the trim dark blue or bright white. Several pieces of the gingerbread and filigree embellishments were painted in a rainbow of colors making them stand out in perfect contrast. Walking across the porch, I looked at the detail of the leaded glass windows and the intricate carving on the front door. When we walked through the door, the interior was as magnificent as was the exterior. Whether it was wall color, woodwork and trim, built in cabinetry or fireplace mantels everything was perfect. Every room was perfect, even the kitchen where there were modern appliances made to look like vintage pieces. The sitting room, parlor and dining room were furnished exquisitely. It appeared as if everything was done. I was awestruck by what I was seeing. "Vivian, its magnificent! There's nothing I could do to improve it." But Vivian had two more rooms to show me. Leading the way upstairs and down the hall, she opened the double doors leading into the master suite. "I can't wait to hang some of your art work in the hall but come here and look. This will be our suite. Our private enclave and it needs to reflect both of our taste. I wanted you to see the room first, then we're going to meet with Brent Fuller the contractor, and Gwen Seville, she's the interior designer whose been helping me. They're both down stairs waiting for us, because I need you to see one more room there as well." This time, we made our way down the back stairway which led to a hallway adjacent to the kitchen. "This was called the servant's stairway, used when they were summoned by the lady of the house. Perhaps someday you'll be using it, wearing a sexy French Maid's uniform while serving me breakfast in bed." And Vivian couldn't help but giggle as she said this. Not to be outdone, I turned her comments back on her, "Or perhaps you, playing the part of the scullery maid, coming to serve your ladyship?" And we were both laughing out loud as we descended the stairway into the back hall. When we reached the first floor, I assumed we would head back to the sitting room or parlor, but Vivian turned me the opposite direction. We stepped through a small archway into a yet unseen room, a large open space spanning the entire width of the house and extending at least 20 feet further back. Stepping into the room, Vivian introduced the contractor and designer, and with a sweeping motion of her hand, "And this glorious space, is your studio. A workspace worthy of your talent." I just stood there taking it all in. "This can't be real, is it? You can't mean that, do you? Oh my God!" And again, she had me crying. Tears of happiness flowed down my cheeks and I hugged her to me, not wanting to let go. Vivian was glowing. She wanted to surprise me, and she had succeeded. "Right now, it's just a big empty space, but that's why Brent and Gwen are here. This is your space, and they're going to make it perfect for you. All you need to do is tell them what you want, and they'll make it happen. Nothings too good for you, so go wild if you want... I can't wait to see how it turns out." The room truly was magnificent, close to 20 x 40 feet with the back wall holding eight large windows allowing the afternoon sun to light the room. It had originally been an indoor garden space and had once been filled with beautiful flower beds and a few vegetable boxes. I realized this and decided on the spot that this would play a part in my design. There was more than enough room for studio space and I would love painting amongst the flowers. For the next several hours, Brent, Gwen and I talked design. Everything from arrangement of the space, built in cabinets, to colors of walls and trim, and the best kind of flowers to grow. Vivian watched for a long time while we were busy, decisions being made. After a while, when she was sure her input wasn't needed she headed out knowing we wouldn't miss her. By the time she returned, the sun was on the horizon, and the red and golden rays shown through the windows tracing their patterns on the walls. While the design process was wrapped up, Vivian laid out an evening snack. There was an arrangement of tarts and pastries along with tea and coffee. When the discussions finally ended, Vivian redirected our little group to the dining room. We'd been so engrossed in our discussions we were all surprised by how late it was. We assured her that all the major decisions had been made, and only a few details would need to be decided as the work progressed. I looked at Vivian with tears again forming in my eyes. "It's going to be amazing. I don't know how I can ever thank you enough." But Vivian had the answer ready. "You thanked me more than enough when you let me put that ring on your finger." Once things had been wrapped up at the house, we headed across town to Vivian's parents' house. I was quiet, worrying about the upcoming reaction, but Vivian was verbose. "I can't wait to see mother's reaction when she sees your ring. I brought a bottle of champagne with us to celebrate, and it might take more than a glass or two to calm her nerves. I'm sure daddy will be totally accepting, I think he's been expecting this. But with mother, you never know. I think deep in her heart she'll understand and know it's the right thing for both of us, but that might not temper her first response. But we shall see, and she will have to accept it as well." When we entered the house, I was fighting my nerves, and I even felt Vivian's hand shake. But in the end, it couldn't have gone better. It was like her mother had her radar turned on and before we had taken six steps into the house, she took hold of my hand, pulled it up looking at the ring. "It's beautiful! I wondered how long it would take, but I knew... I just knew." And she pulled the both of us into a hug. Hearing the commotion Vivian's father entered the room, and when he could decipher what was being said, he was congratulating both of us. And while he stood there watching the three of us, we were all shedding tears. I had cried so much during the day, I thought the tears would dry up, but every time I looked at the ring on my finger, the tears returned. That night when we returned to Vivian's condo was special. We were connected on a whole new level. Vivian was ecstatic but could tell I was worried and had no idea what was rattling around in my brain. I could see the concern in her eyes, so, I just spilled it, "My biggest fear is going back into boy mode and wearing a tuxedo. I don't know if I can do that?" But Vivian put that thought right out of my head. "Do you think I'd miss seeing you in a gorgeous wedding gown? I've been talking to Shelly about wedding dresses for weeks now, just hoping you wouldn't say no. I already have an idea for my dress, and I can't wait to see what you choose. I think the dresses are something we need to decide on early, because it takes time to get them made. Then we need to decide when, and where." Next on the agenda, was to tell my parents. I wanted to call them right away, but as always, Vivian had other plans. "We promised them we'd come visit, and I think this gives us the perfect excuse." So that became the new plan. Since it was still early in California, I called and talked to mother, making the arrangements. We'd arrive on Tuesday and stay until Sunday. My parents were thrilled we we're coming and promised to have a week's worth of activities planned. I tried to explain, saying we didn't expect anything special, but they insisted they had to show Vivian the same hospitality they enjoyed on their visit. Vivian had made the flights reservations, and we were flying first class direct from Chicago to San Diego. I asked why first class and she said, "Frequent flier miles. Better to use them than lose them. And consider it another reward for wearing that ring." Landing in San Diego, we rented a car, knowing how much my father hated driving. It would also give us a bit of freedom to get around without depending on my parents. I wanted to show Vivian everything I remembered that was special to me growing up. At least that was the plan, but I should have known better. When we arrived at my parents' house, things turned into a whirlwind of activities. We barely made it in the door and we were being redirected out again for dinner. During the drive to the restaurant, mother went on about all the things planned for the week, starting with an afternoon at the zoo and ending with a charity event at the art museum. She carried on through the ride, never stopping as we entered the restaurant and were shown to our table. It was when we were seated, and I reached for my water glass, she stopped. Mother reached out taking my hand and looking at the ring. Her mouth was moving, but no words were coming out, and then her tears started. She looked at me, and I could feel her hand shaking, and then my tears started. Before any words were spoken, Vivian reached out taking both our hands and her eyes tearing up as well. And while this was happening, daddy sat there staring at three crying women, totally clueless about what was happening. Once we let daddy in on the secret, the evening turned into a celebration. Daddy insisted on buying the champagne and offering the first toast. "To true love and to happiness, may all of your dreams come true." And at that moment, all my fears and anxiety went away. I had not stopped worrying for the past week how my dad would react, and he made it perfect. After breaking the news at dinner, mother started right away to change her planned agenda for the week. "We need to talk wedding plans. Do you have a date yet? Do you have a venue? What about dresses? We need to take a day to look at dresses. I don't expect you to buy it hear, but I'll not miss out on the search. We can look at dresses and pick out styles that are the most flattering. And what about the guest list? I don't think many of your relatives will attend, half way across the country, but you still need to invite them. Maybe Aunt Nellie and Uncle John will show up and maybe Aunt Mabel and Uncle Mark. They were always partial to you and very understanding." While we did take time out during the week to visit the zoo, go to the beach, tour the art museum and attend the charity event, the wedding planning was never far from our conversation. Thursday, we took the entire day shopping for dresses. I had not stopped thinking about dresses since Vivian told me she expected me to wear a dress, and my mind was a mess just considering style options. Since Vivian had already decided on a style for herself, this trip was all about me. As it turned out, mother and Vivian had definite ideas on what they would like to see me wear. For mother, it was a princess gown, a big flowing skirt and an embellished bodice with a modest neckline. For Vivian, it was strapless and much more fitted. She described it as classic and sexy. For me, the options seemed endless. At the first shop, I must have looked at 30 gowns and tried on 5. Two were princess ballgowns, two were modified A lines, one with a drop waist, and the final one a mermaid style. While none of them were perfect, they did help me deciding what I liked and what I didn't. We visited three more shops that afternoon, and I tried on another three dresses at each shop. While there was still not the perfect gown, I now had a very good idea what I wanted, and while I wouldn't share my thoughts with Vivian or mother, once I got home, I knew it wouldn't take me long to find a dress. With my artistic ability, I created a visual image of the dress, and I would be able to use this in my search. With Shelly's help, it wouldn't take long to find the perfect dress. Daddy seemed relieved to have a day of peace and quiet while we were dress shopping but was clearly overwhelmed by the discussion over diner. At one point, he rolled his eyes back, "How can it be that difficult? You looked at what, over a hundred dresses? Surely out of that many dresses there must be one, doesn't there?" And he took a long drink of his gin and tonic while signaling the waiter that he needed another. "It would be much simpler if you were wearing a tux! Not so many choices and decisions." And at that point he knew he had gone too far. To say the rest of the evening was awkward would be an understatement. I held my words, but felt tears forming in my eyes. Vivian seemed like she was ready to say something, but mother stepped in first. "How dare you? Where are your brains... you must be sitting on them? How inconsiderate and demeaning. And what a bunch of typical male bullshit! Have you no respect at all for your daughter?" Mother stood and was ready to leave the restaurant, but I reached for her hand and held her back. "Mother, it's OK. This can't be easy for him. I realize he's been dealing with this side of me for my entire life, and for the most part, he's been very supportive. But I'm sure this is a big step in a direction he wasn't quite ready to take. I knew this had to happen at some time. I don't think he's ever had the chance to grieve losing his son. And now he must prepare to walk his daughter down the aisle. It's a lot to hit him with, and I'm just so happy to have him here with us." I got up and walked around the table and gave daddy a kiss on the cheek and a big hug. To his credit, he didn't flinch and hugged be warmly. And when I looked up, he had tears in his eyes, and so did mother, and Vivian, so not to be left out, I cried as well. By morning, we all seemed to have recovered, and all was right in our world. We spent the next two days just being a family and enjoying the company of each other. Saturday evening, we attended the charity event just relaxing and allowing the stress of the week to subside. Vivian and I were scheduled to head home on an early evening flight Sunday, had packed and were ready early. But daddy had a surprise for us all. "We've got tickets for a brunch cruise down the coast. It's great for whale watching and the dolphins always put on a show. And if we're lucky, the meal will be pretty good too." So, we all packed in the rental and headed to the yacht club where the small cruise ship docked. I wasn't sure what to expect, but it was an elegant ship of seventy feet or so, expressly designed for this purpose. Altogether, there were 40 or 50 people waiting to board, and when we did, we were seated at elegant tables along the sides of the ship. The cruise lasted just over three hours and was the perfect way to wind down our visit. The discussion was light, mostly centered around details of the wedding, particularly when and where. Mother and Vivian put together a plan that included weekly conference calls, an internet schedule to keep up on progress, and planning sessions including Vivian's mother in the process. In the end, even daddy conceded that was a good plan. I could tell that he was feeling a bit left out, but also was comfortable to let us handle it. On the flight back to Chicago, Vivian and I tried to recap everything which had happen during the week, the ebb and flow of emotions. But in the end, decided to let it settle for a while. We knew it had all worked out in the end and were both too exhausted. So, we settled in leaning on each other and slept for the four-hour flight, happy to have the sleep to deal with the three-hour ordeal of getting out of the airport and home. Over the next three weeks, Vivian and I spent every spare minute at the house or looking at furniture for the bedroom while the contractors worked to get the studio put together. I also spent hours working with Gwen to finalize the d?cor and furnishing for the studio. Gwen even arranged to bring in a gardening expert to help with the creation of the flower beds. Once all the decisions were made, it would be another month before everything was complete. During the time the house was being finished, Vivian and I started the serious planning for our wedding. While making decisions on our dresses was high on the list, it required a little coordination on our part. It was a forgone conclusion that Shelly would supply the dresses, it still required Vivian and me to shop separately so our choices were secret. The other big decision was the date, and it was dependent on the availability of the venue for the wedding and the reception. The biggest hurdle here was that most of the halls were booked for weddings anywhere from a year to two years in advance. There was no way we were going to wait that long, but... we were flexible on the date, so we could use that in our favor. Vivian was taking the lead in all areas of wedding planning, but never made a decision without my input. It was in her nature. When she had a mission, and a goal in mind she summoned up near superhuman energy. So, on Friday evening when she met me at Sanguine Caf? for dinner it didn't surprise me when she showed me a brochure for Wells Mansion and Prairie Garden Chapel. I'd never heard of it, but Vivian was excited. "I never expected we could get in, but they have an opening! I don't know if someone cancelled or how it could be open, but it's there... July 15th. Perfect, just perfect, and I've scheduled an appointment for us to visit tomorrow." The visit to Wells Mansion couldn't have gone better. While Vivian and I had been wrapped up in telling our parents and just reveling in the fact we were really going to be married, I don't think we had taken even a single minute to just let it all sink in, but, being at the venue and knowing it was where we would exchange vows, it all hit home. The Chapel was an amazing structure built in the garden surrounded by acres of flowers. The ceremony would be held here, and the reception in the mansion's great halls. As Vivian and I stood near the alter looking back across the Chapel, it became real. We looked at each other, and we both had tears in our eyes. We kissed and hugged and knew it would be perfect. IX At the office, everything changed. Where as in the past everyone treated me well, now, I was engaged to the daughter of the senior partner, and... my artwork was on display in the lobby. It all created somewhat of a celebrity status which was somewhat flattering, but sometimes a bit over the top. I think it was as uncomfortable for everyone else as it was for me. Vivian and I discussed the situation at work and decided to make changes. Since the house was coming together, I could give up my apartment and move in. That would save some money and allow me to supervise the finishing work at the house. This part of the plan also had me giving up my job and would allow me to get my studio set up and prepare canvases to begin my project for Don Warren. I could set up the easels and allow the canvas to acclimate. I could even brush on the sizing and base color allowing as much time as needed for drying time. I could even plan an initial trip to Colorado to visit the property and get the first pictures that would guide my paintings. I tried to talk Vivian out of the idea. "Giving up my apartment makes sense, and getting my studio set up would be great, but give up my job? I still need money to survive. I appreciate the way you treat me and take care of me, but it would be unfair to you to have to support me." But Vivian in her normal take charge style was having none of it. "Look, your real career is based upon your talent, and you need your studio, you need to immerse yourself in your art and Don Warren's project. Once I've finished negotiating with him, you'll make more money for those paintings than you would working two years in the office. I'm not taking on any kind of a burden, I'm making an investment... in you, and in us. So, don't give me any grief! I've not yet taken you across my knees and paddled that cute little butt of yours, but don't tempt me." So, it was decided, and that same weekend, I moved out of the apartment and into the house... the guest bedroom. Vivian and I agreed neither of us would use our suite until after the wedding when we would move in together. It only took two loads in a van to move me. I didn't have furniture or appliances, only my clothes and personal belongings, which filled most of one van, and my art supplies and equipment which filled the remainder of that van and the entire second one. On Monday, I made my way to the office to clean out my desk and say my good-byes. Everyone treated me so nice with many telling me not to be a stranger, stop by for lunch, or that they would see me at the wedding. I felt like I was leaving an important part of my life behind me but knew I had many friends here. After a final stop by Grant's office to thank him, I headed to see Vivian before heading out the door to the waiting taxi. Leave it to Vivian to make everything OK. She kissed me passionately, "Stop home to drop your things off, and then head back to town. You have an appointment with Shelly to talk dresses. I've got a head start on you, because I've already talked to her, and she'll have my dress ready for a first fitting next week." It was when she said 'home' it happened. Once again, it all became very real. Home, a word I hadn't used since I moved away from my parent's house. That had been the only home I'd had, and now I had a home I would soon share with Vivian. When I got to the house, I didn't waste any time. I had the taxi wait while I dropped my things in the house. When Vivian had said I had an appointment with Shelly my excitement level went way up. All the sadness about leaving the office was gone and I was looking forward to seeing Shelly. I had a picture in my mind based upon the dress shopping with mother and Vivian. Now I would see if the dress actually existed. When I walked through the door at the Elegant Lady, Shelly was ready for me. "I pulled several dresses for you to look at and give me your opinion on styles. As we look at them we can talk about the plusses and minuses. Vivian has told me you've already tried on several dresses, so you may already know what style you prefer, but looking at all the dresses will give you a chance to decide for sure. So, while we look, tell me what you think of each one and what you're looking for." As I looked at each of the dresses, it was easy to eliminate several of them based upon the mental image I had of my ideal dress. First, we eliminated anything columnar and all the mermaid style dresses. Then we moved on to A-line dresses and ballgowns and this is where I wanted to be. As we looked at the dresses, I described to Shelly what I envisioned. "I want a true princess dress. A princess neckline either sleeveless or with cap sleeves. Maybe off the shoulder. I want more fullness then I've seen in most A-lines, but not quite the huge skirt of most ball gowns. I prefer satin, maybe with a lace overlay. I think some small embellishments are fine, but I'm not into the big crystals or sequins." As I spoke, Shelly eliminated a couple dresses and we were down to four. "I want you to try these on and see what you think when you're wearing it and when you look in the mirror. A lot of brides think they know exactly what they want, but when they start trying on dresses, there opinion changes." After I'd tried on the four dresses, I was able to refine my vision. One of the dresses came close but was not perfect. The skirt was a bit too bell shaped and tapered from front to rear creating a short train. I much preferred a sweep hemline cut even, and just brushing the floor. Also, I became infatuated with one of the other skirts that was exactly what I wanted and featured four pickups at the hem revealing the frilly edges of the multi layered underskirts and full-length petties. When I relayed my thought to Shelly, she just smiled. "I know just the dress. I kind of had a feeling when I was looking through dresses, but I didn't want to bring it out too soon. As a matter of fact, there are three dresses that are similar, and I'll bring them all out, but I'm pretty sure I know which one it will be. Now let me warn you, it won't be perfect, but we can make it perfect." When Shelly returned with the three dresses it proved she was true to her word. They were all spectacular. And with her was Marty carrying one of the dresses. "I figured another pair of eyes and another opinion couldn't hurt. Besides Marty threatened to quit if I didn't bring her in on this." The first dress Shelly brought out was simply gorgeous. It was sleeveless with a princess neckline trimmed in ribbon. The bodice was fitted to the waist and embellished with a pattern of small crystals in a freeform swirl pattern. The skirt was a very full A-line and ended in a sweep hem. But there were two issues with this dress, the skirt being absent of any embellishments look stiff and plain, and the were no pickups at the hem. The second dress was equally beautiful, and I thought this might be the one. The bodice was satin with a lace overlay and a scooped neckline. It had cap sleeves made from the same lace. From the fitted waist, the skirt flared dramatically to a sweep hem with three pickups, each showing the lace underskirt. Everything seemed perfect until I was wearing the dress, and then it wasn't right. The skirt rode over my hips creating more of a bell shape rather than A-line, and the hem with the pickups just didn't look quite right. I was so disappointed. When Shelly brought the third dress, I didn't know what to think. When she held it up, it didn't look like anything I wanted. But as she flared it out I began to see it differently. The dress wasn't satin. But the material had a texture and sheen which made it look soft and flowy. I looked at Shelly with a questioning look. Shelly smiled, "Charmeuse. It's just as soft as it looks. It will move freely with every step you take. And look at the hem. I think it gives you what you're looking for and more. Let's get you into it and see if you don't agree." Still filled with doubt, I slipped into the dress. As the softness of the material enveloped me, I began to think Shelly could be right. As the dress settled into place it began to feel even better. It had the princess neckline I wanted, was not strapless but off the shoulder with small sleeves that settled on my arms. The bodice fit snugly, embellished with only a small cluster of crystals. The cut of the dress defined my waistline before flaring gracefully and being supported by a crinoline. The hemline was cut in a handkerchief pattern with the points just sweeping the floor. This was in place of the pickups and when I saw it, it was so much better. Shelly was absolutely right, I wanted to keep this dress on forever! She said it wouldn't be perfect, but I disagreed. I couldn't see how it could be any better. As I stood there with my eyes glued to the mirror, Shelly and Marty began to adjust the dress pulling it in a bit here or there, lifting and adjusting the hem, and pulling down on the neck line. Shelly kept up an ongoing dialog the whole time. "I think we need to take in the waist about two inches. She'll be wearing a corset, but she needs to be able to breath and dance comfortably. If we raise the hem an inch, then add a layer of lace to the crinoline it will make the skirt fuller and the hemline a bit sexier. Then, if we pull the center of the neckline down a bit it will take full advantage of her lovely d?colletage." Now, I was blushing furiously, and Marty decided to take advantage of the situation. "Kellie, you're going to look so hot in this dress, Vivian is going to want to skip the dinner and reception, take you to the honeymoon suite and shag you like there's no tomorrow. And it makes me so hot and jealous, I'm tempted to jump your bones right here, right now!" Now I was shocked, and Shelly wasn't far behind. When I looked at her face, she was somewhere between amazed and pure laughter. Either way it relieved any stress that was hanging around and we all laughed. Then we all hugged, and then we all cried. So, the decision was made, and I couldn't have been more pleased. The dress was everything I could imagine. I felt elegant, beautiful and sexy. When Marty placed a veil on my head we were all in tears again. Shelly pulled us together in a group hug and we just stood there holding each other. After several minutes, we pulled it all together and Shelly and Marty were able to finish the fitting. Shelly said she would order the dress in my size and we would do another fitting and make the final adjustments. She had to put a rush on the order but promised me we could get it with time to spare. I left the Elegant Lady late in the day wishing the wedding was tomorrow. I was frustrated with waiting. I was anxious for the day to arrive, yet I realized how much yet needed to be done. But I knew better than to be too worried. Vivian and our mothers had everything under control. So much so, that Vivian was pushing me to head out to Colorado to visit Don Warren and see his property. I did need to get a feel for the property and take some pictures to provide the inspiration for the painting. With the dress decision made, I had run out of excuses, so Wednesday morning, Vivian dropped me at the airport for a flight to Denver. "Don's wife is going to meet you in Denver. Her name is Sharron and she's a real sweetheart. You're going to love her. She missed the unveiling of your paintings, and she's looking forward to meeting you. She'll take you to the corporate terminal and fly with you on their personal plane to Aspen, I think it's a Gulf 5, so it ought to be a real treat." The flight to Denver was smooth and quiet and I managed to get a little sleep. I had been having a bit of an anxiety attack questioning myself about this project. I knew what I was capable of, and was confidant in my artistic ability, but this was the first time I was painting for someone else... someone who was going to pay me an incredible amount for these four painting. And it was going to be a project that would keep me occupied for a great part of the next 18 months. So, my nerves were becoming a bit frayed. Vivian was 100% right about Sharron. She was a 5-foot 100-pound ball of energy. With bright blue eyes, a mass of blonde curls and an infectious smile you couldn't help but like her. When she first saw me, she bounded across the lobby and threw herself at me hugging me like an old friend. "I'd recognize you anywhere. Don told me you were a pretty little thing, but that's certainly an understatement." Sharron grabbed the handle of my roller bag while I was wrestling with my carry on, my computer bag and purse. She moved at a brisk pace causing me to almost jog to keep up with her as we worked our way out of the terminal to the waiting van that would take us over to the corporate terminal. Once we were in the van, Sharron started a string of questions. "Where did you study art? Have you always been this talented or is this something your acquired in school? Don showed me pictures he took of your paintings at the law office and I think they're magnificent. Do you think you can make our little piece of ground look as good?" I never had a chance to answer any of her questions, and I think she wasn't expecting answers. It was her way of keeping up the conversation and she kept it up until we made our way through the corporate gate and pulled up next to a beautiful gleaming white jet with blue and red stripes leading to the IntelliTech logo on the tail. "Here's our ride home. A little smaller than what you flew in on, but a whole lot more fun." When she said, 'a whole lot more fun', Sharron meant it. When we reached the end of the runway and the pilot wound up the engine, you could feel the power resonating through the plane. Then when the plane stared to accelerate I was pushed back in my seat feeling the force pressing me deep into the seat. Then, only a few seconds later, the wheels left the ground, and it felt like we were climbing straight up. After a few minutes, the plane leveled off and we were cruising smoothly. Sharron unbuckled her seat belt and made her way towards the rear of the cabin and two cabinets there. She soon returned with a bottle of champagne, two glasses and a small plate of tiny pastry treats. "We've got about an hour, so we might as well enjoy ourselves," and she poured the champagne, handed me a flute, and offered a toast. "To new friends and a new artistic venture." We talked throughout the flight, Sharron sharing her and Don's story. "We met in college at Northwestern where Don studied business and I studied music. Don's first job was in an investment firm and I worked in a recording studio. We got lucky when Don was talked into investing $5,000 in a telecommunication start up. Three years later that investment that investment was worth $500,000 and then the company went public. Suddenly, we had more money than we had ever dreamed of. And it just kept getting better. Don made a few more investments, and everyone seemed to pay of big. His last investment was to purchase a small computer software company... Intellitech." She talked about establishing a philanthropic charity that gave her something to do while Don was in Chicago, or New York or Paris or wherever business took him. "He's in charge of making the money, and I'm in charge of giving it away. We have more than we could ever spend, and I think it's our duty to share our good fortune." Then she looked and said, "Now tell me about you." I gave her the short story of my life, not feeling comfortable dwelling on my past, so I spent most of the time talking about the past few years since I'd met Vivian. When I finally got around to the wedding she stopped me mid-sentence. "Wedding? Really, you're getting married?" And she threw herself across the aisle between us hugging me like my best friend. Well once Sharron knew about the wedding, it set the tone for the remainder of the visit. She acted like my favorite aunt, wanting to know everything there was to know about the wedding plans; when, where and what about my dress? We spent the first afternoon at the ranch with Sharron giving me tour of the property. I was amazed at the spectacular views available. I had no idea how I would select the best view for my paintings. I had my camera with me and took dozens of pictures. I would sit with Sharron later and review them and see if we could make a decision. Later in the evening, Sharron and I dined on the rear deck. She had arranged for a local caterer to bring in an amazing meal. We dined on a grilled shrimp appetizer, ginger glazed chicken breast over spinach pasta and vegetable skewers. It was complemented by a crisp Pinot Grigio and finished with fresh fruit. Just as the sun was setting, Sharron poured more wine and took me by the hand leading me back into the house. "Follow me. I've got to show you something special." We walked down a hallway and entered a room that had to be Don's office. Everything about the room screamed, 'successful businessman'. From the large oak desk, bookshelves lining the walls and rustic d?cor it was a visualization of Don the man. Sharron watched as I took in the details of the room giving me a minute to take it all in before she spoke. "It's Don's inner sanctum. This is the nerve center of the business. He has his corporate office in Chicago, but this is his retreat when he needs to get away, but still take care of business." Then, taking me by the hand again she pulled me towards the wall of windows behind the desk. "You've got to see this view. I think this is what Don had in mind when to talked about 'his' inspiration for the paintings." When we stepped near the windows and looked out across the view, I let out an audible gasp. It was truly magnificent. From the house, the grounds sloped lazily across gentle rolls of pastural land. There were several clusters of pine trees and aspens framing the edges of a small stream that flowed through the base of this small valley. Then beyond the stream the opposite side of the valley rose more abruptly towards the backdrop of the higher peaks. The peaks rose to spectacular heights with the last rays of golden sunshine playing off their slopes. The view was breathtaking! I spent the next two days roaming the property with Sharron taking more pictures, but at the end of both days we ended up in Don's office watching the sunset over the mountains and valley and sipping wine. There was no doubt in my mind or hers that this was the view we wanted to use. Now I just needed to get started. Staying through the weekend gave Sharron the opportunity to show me the best of Aspen. Saturday afternoon, she made reservations at the Justice Snow's, a glamourous, vintage styled restaurant in the historic Wheeler Opera House. "It's where Don and I go when we want an absolutely wonderful meal and a casual setting. You can come here in jeans or a cocktail dress and be equally comfortable and accepted." We didn't go to either extreme, settling for casual dresses and comfortable shoes. After an early dinner, and a few cocktails we decided to wander the streets and a few of the shops which were open into the evening hours. After working our way through several shops, Sharron dragged me into a jewelry store with incredible displays of rings, necklaces and other jewelry. A few pieces had prices on them and I was shocked, nothing was less than $1,000. I was afraid to even consider what the cost was for the other pieces. It was one of those 'if you have to ask, you can't afford it' moments. As we were looking an amazing assortment of rings with emeralds, rubies and of course diamonds, we were approached by a sales associate, an elegantly dressed lady of approximately the same age as Sharron. "Kellie, this is my friend Bernice. She owns this shop with her husband, Arnie." And hugs were shared all around. "They sell some really gorgeous pieces, and the best ones are things they've designed." Bernice pulled out a few pieces for me to look at, and I couldn't deny how lovely they were. After looking at several pieces, she took out a set of matching necklaces featuring two interwoven hearts, delicately engraved and each tipped with a small diamond. She handed me one to look at while she picked up the second one. As I was looking at the hearts, I noticed that she was not replacing the piece she was holding in the case but placing it in a velvet lined box. I looked up, a little confused to see Sharron smiling. "Look at the engraving on the back." Holding the piece carefully, still not sure what was happening, I turned it over in my hands. There on the on the back, engraved in delicate script it said, "Kellie and Vivian - Forever". I looked up to see both ladies smiling, and tears flooded my eyes. "Oh my God! Is this for real? Why would you do this? This is so incredible! You can't..." And I was done. I couldn't have got out another word if I had to. Sharron's smile grew even bigger. "I can, and I did. When I found out you and Vivian were getting married, I decided you needed something special. Every girl needs something like this to share with the love of her life, so I called Bernice, told her what I had in mind. Let me help you put that around your neck. Bernice is putting Vivian's in a nice little box, so you can present it to her." On the way back to the house, Sharron revealed the rest of her motives for making the purchase. "I've known Vivian since she was four or five years old. She's like the daughter I never had and grew up calling me Auntie Sharron. Don and I don't have any children. We tried, and I had two miscarriages. Then I had to have a hysterectomy. I've watched her grow up and become a beautiful, intelligent woman, and I want to do everything I can to make her life happy, and this is one little thing I could do. I hope you won't hold it against me." How could I hold it against her? I spent the rest of the evening just thanking her. Then while we were sitting on the massive deck watching the sunset yet again, she filled me in on the plans for Sunday. "Let's sleep in tomorrow... I think we've earned it. We'll have brunch in town and then fly to Denver, so make sure you're packed and ready to go. I've reserved a suite at the Hilton for the two of us. We'll have plenty of time for a great dinner and a good night's sleep. Monday morning, I'll be flying out at 6AM and I'll try not to wake you. I'll be meeting Don in Houston and then we're heading to the Bahamas for a week of sand and surf. Your flight isn't until two, so you'll have plenty of time to get to the airport. Later, after she had opened a bottle of Merlot, I pulled out my computer, and we started looking through the pictures I had accumulated during the week. We knew the view I would be using, that was the easy part, but now I wanted her thought on how I would frame the painting, what was the proper width and height. Using the mountains and sky as the backdrop gave us lots of choices as to how big or small the picture would be. Once we made some of these basic decisions, then we could talk about how big the canvases would be, and this led to a discussion of where the paintings would be displayed. In the end, we decided on 36 inches tall by 40 inches wide for the paintings size, which would give us a very lovely perspective of the landscape. Then we walked over to the room that Sharron called their gallery. The ceilings of the room were 12 feet tall, and the back wall was 24 feet across. There were several paintings already hung there, but Sharron assured me they would be moved. "We've got so much wall space in here, plus I'm having some display walls made for the smaller paintings. I want to give it something of a museum feel. X Arriving home was a special event. First, it really was home, and I had that magnificent home waiting for me. But better yet, there in the baggage claim was Vivian waiting for me. I had been gone for less than a week, but it felt like a year. I saw her smile at me, and I pulled her in a tight embrace. "I've never missed anything or anybody as much as I missed you!" Vivian wiggled away enough so she was able to give me a kiss. "I've missed you too. I've got so much to tell you about the wedding plans. But first things first, tell me about your visit with Sharron." We drove only a few miles from the airport before stopping for dinner. There was no sense trying to deal with rush hour traffic. We stopped in at an Italian restaurant that had been in business for 75 years. Marcello's was known far and wide for their amazing food, so it was worth stopping. We sat and ordered our meal while sipping wine and when I felt we were both relaxed a bit I started. "Let me tell you what Auntie Sharron had to say." And that was all I got out. "Oh my God! She told you about that? I mean, I can understand her telling you, but the first time you met her, I didn't think she would say anything. So, what else did my Auntie tell you?" I couldn't help but laugh. "She only had kind things to say. She said you were like the daughter she never had. And... she sent this for you." And I reached into my purse pulling out the small velvet covered jewelry box. "She said every young woman in love should have something like this." Vivian took the box and opened it slowly, taking her time to examine the contents. It was like she expected something to jump out of the box. But when she had the box fully open, her eyes lit up and a huge smile came to her face. "Oh my God. What is this." And she picked up the necklace and examined it closely. "This is gorgeous! What did I do to deserve this?" Then when she looked up, I took the matching necklace out from under my blouse where it had been hidden. And when she saw my necklace she really broke down, and the tears flowed. When she could find her voice, her words were still trembling. "What were the two of you up to? Did you know about this, or was it a surprise to you as well?" By now, I also had tears in my eyes. "I had no idea she was planning this. We had dinner in town, and then while we were walking through the shops, she dragged me into the jewelry store. Before I knew what was happening, she was placing this one around my neck while yours was placed in the box." Once we finished dinner, Vivian drove us to her condo rather than the house. "We have an agreement, remember? I think we'd better spend the night here, then you can head over to the house in the morning." Arriving at the condo, we fell into each other's arms. It had been a week since we had been together, and we were both ready to release pent up passion. Quickly, our clothes were piled on the floor and we were entangled in bed. Our first embraces were tender but built quickly. I allowed Vivian to set the pace and lead our lovemaking. I always felt comfortable allowing her to be the dominate partner in our love making, and neither of us were ever disappointed. It was sometime after midnight when we finally fell to sleep, with our bodies still wrapped together. I slept in such totally comfort that when Vivian rolled over in the early morning, I wrapped my arms tighter pulling her back to me. She rolled a bit more and responded by tightening her grip on me as well. We stayed that way for several more minutes until I felt her nuzzle closer and kiss me gently. When we made our way out of the bed, Vivian took me by the hand and led me to the shower. We spent the next twenty minutes in soapy, sudsy embraces before the hot water started to fade. We quickly dried and made our way back to the bedroom to dress. We decided on a quick breakfast of coffee and Danish before getting our day started. Vivian had it all planned. "I've got to get you up to speed. Our mothers have been running wild and we need to make a few decisions to get them back in line. They've been talking about everything from colors to flowers, to music and more. They've got some great ideas, but we need to be making the final decisions." The rest of the day was then taken up with wedding planning. We visited a florist and decided on flowers. Our mothers had made some preliminary 'suggestions' and we were able to make a decision which included some of their ideas. Then it was a caterer where we sampled everything from appetizers to desserts plus several options for main courses. By the time the day had passed, we'd chosen rose bouquets for Vivian and me, and floral arrangements with more roses, daisies, and carnations. The meal would start with lobster-crab cakes, followed by prime rib with Asian shrimp skewers, desert would be champagne sorbet with mixed fruit. Hopefully everyone would still have room for cake, a traditional white wedding cake, but layered with fresh strawberries and custard. Late in the afternoon, Vivian drove back to the house, so I could get settled in. She helped carry my things in, we deposited them in the bedroom I was using. Then she took me by the hand and led me to my studio. "I can't wait for you to see how much progress has been made. Gwen and Brent have been working overtime to get it ready. There's still a bit of work needing to be completed, but I really wanted you to have your studio space ready to start your paintings." When we walked into the space I couldn't have been more surprised. Gwen and Brant had taken everything we had discussed and turned the space into a magnificent studio. The walls were finished in soft lavender and the trim was done in two darker shades plus white. It all kept with the vintage feel of the house. The floor of studio area was a combination of large dove grey tiles with smaller black and white tiles creating geometric pattern that defined the space. There were three large cabinets to hold supplies and two large work tables. And centered in the work space were all four of my large easels and two smaller easels which held paintings I had in process. There were three stools of various heights where I could sit comfortably as I worked. I took it all in, and then looked at the rest of the room. There were eight raised bed garden spaces set in front of the windows. They were sized and spaced to allow easy access for planting and pruning, and several already held beautiful flowers. And on the opposite end of the room from the studio was a small garden sitting area. A round rug covered the tile floor and was set with an elegant table with matching chairs. Vivian smiled as we walked towards the sitting area. "This is our special place. We can sit here for morning coffee, afternoon tea, or wine in the evening. This is where we can come to relax and talk about what is special in our lives." And she turned to me and kissed me deeply. Over the next several days, Vivian and I spent most of our time putting the final pieces in place for the wedding. We chose music for the ceremony, picked a band for the reception, selected songs for our first dance and dances with our parents. Then we chose music for the rest of the reception, everything from the Big Bands, to rock, songs from the 50s, 60s 70s and 80s. And then all our current favorites. Thursday morning, Vivian had the final fitting for her gown and in the afternoon, it was my turn. My dress was perfect. Yet again I didn't want to take it off. If there was any way possible I would have gone directly to the Chapel for the wedding. They say the journey is better than the destination and one should live with the excitement of the anticipation, but I couldn't believe it. All I wanted was to be married to this incredible woman. Friday morning, I sat in the studio, enjoying my coffee and staring at the four blank canvasses fix to the easels. This was not an unusual behavior for me before starting to create the paintings. I would visual the painting on the canvass laying it out in my mind. So clear was this visualization that whenever I would look at the canvass, the painting would reveal itself again. It was like doing a paint by numbers in my mind. As I sat there, I created in my mind, an overall layout and framing of the paintings, and then I looked from one canvass to the next visualizing each of the four seasons. While this was really, only valid for the spring painting as I overlay my recent observations, it allowed me to look forward to the other three seasons. These would require a minimum of three more visits to the ranch, but that was something else to look forward to. It would still be a few weeks before I lay down the first brush strokes and began to build shape and color. Until then, I would return to the canvasses each day and do my visualizations until they were perfectly fixed in my mind. Only then would I be ready to begin the hard work... but the fun work. While I spent time with my canvasses and my thoughts, the craftsmen and women who were putting the finishing touches on the studio and the gardens worked around me. Every once and a while, one of them would stop and stare or ask, "Do you really see something there?" I'd just smile and tell them it could only be seen through my eyes, at least for now, and tell them to check back in a few months. As these weeks passed, Vivian was deeply involved in some sort of securities investment case I couldn't begin to understand. It kept her busy, and included a couple of trips to DC, all of which served to keep us apart. We'd talk three times a day, working through details for the wedding, but mostly about how we missed each other. Every day, I grew to love her more and she reciprocated. We were ready to spend the rest of our lives together. Two weeks before the wedding, Vivian returned from one of her trips. She snuck in to the studio just as I was brushing a thin matt coat of background color for the sky. This would be the base over which many other layers would build the final image. Just as I set the brush aside, I heard her behind me. "When you finish there, the walls in the dining room could use some touch up." I turned towards her trying to give my best pout and hurt look, but it didn't work. Before I could say a word, she leaped into my arms and her lips met mine. She almost knocked me off my feet, and I managed to keep my balance, but it didn't make any difference as we both sank slowly to the floor. After kissing and cuddling for several minutes, as we sat holding each other, Vivian as was her style took the lead. "I think you'd better put you paints away so we can head to the condo. We've come this far, I'd hate to break our promise now, but I want you. I need your body, so get a move on it missy." It was another twenty minutes before I could clean my brushes and put up the paint, and by the time I was done we were running out the door. We made it across town in record time. I warned Vivian about speeding tickets, but she said she knew a good lawyer. Arriving at the condo, our clothes were hitting the floor before the door closed behind us. We raced to the bedroom acting like teenagers with hormone overload, and when we hit the bed we hugged each other tightly and both broke out in laughter. Neither of us could speak for several minutes, but we continued our embrace. Finally, Vivian found her voice, "You are such a tease. You bring out the best in me and the worst in me. But just think, in a few weeks all we'll need to do is climb the stairs to our new bedroom." After several more minutes of kissing and hugging, Vivian rolled me over causing my penis to stick straight up in the air. She leaned forward and kissed the tip, causing it to twitch. "We really haven't discussed it," She said as she slowly stroked me, "But I hope you're not planning to get rid of this anytime soon." I had only thought about 'this' a thousand times or more, but not recently. For the last several months, I had been focused on three things only, my paintings, the wedding, and everything I could possibly do to keep Vivian happy. Unknown to her, I had been experiencing fits of paranoia and panic attacks, fearing that she would change her mind at the last minute and I'd be out on the street. I realized it was an irrational fear, and that our love for each other was a testament to the strength of our relationship, but it didn't change a thing. For the most part, other than a few tears, I had hidden it from Vivian, but now that she brought it up, so to speak, my fears jumped to the forefront. I looked up at Vivian, and hugged her tight to me, hoping to hide the tears forming in my eyes, but my sobs gave me away. I pulled away looking for a place to hide and finding none. "I'm sorry. I am so sorry to be such a disappointment to you." And the flood gates opened, and my words faded back to sobs. Vivian looked at me with shock showing on her face. "Oh, my baby. I'm the one who should be sorry. You aren't a disappointment to me, you're everything I ever wanted. You are all that I want... all that I need. I was just teasing, and it wasn't right. I love you so much my darling little one, for who you are, just as you are, and how you will always be." And she wiped away my tears. We hugged for a while longer with out saying a word, but then I looked at Vivian and smiled. Again, she looked shocked. "What's that look all about?" I broke out laughing as I answered. "I can't believe I thought you were going to let 'some little thing' come between us." Now she was laughing as well as she reached for that 'little thing'. "You mean this 'little thing'? Well if it's going to be between us, we might as well put it to good use!" The next morning, we slept in and decided that we needed a quiet day of doing nothing but being together. We had no plans and made none. We decided to head to Eugenia's for brunch and sat at the same table where Vivian had proposed to me. While enjoying a mimosa, and buttercream pastries filed with fresh berries, we sat for an hour not speaking a single word, just being comfortable in each other's company. XI The final weeks leading up to the wedding passed by without further incident. With the meticulous planning of Vivian and out mothers every detail had been addressed. There had been very little for me to do aside of a final fitting of my gown. But there was one more thing I had to do. I wanted to buy a special wedding gift for Vivian. Since quitting my job, she was responsible for all our income, and I was feeling hurt for not contributing. While she insisted that my contribution would come through my artwork, I still felt bad. But I still had just a bit of money in an old checking account, and decided it was time to close the account and put the money to good use. When I set out, I had some idea of what I wanted, but also knew I had a limited budget. I knew that Vivian was very partial to emeralds and decided that's what I wanted to find. She had spent so much money on my engagement ring I wanted one just as special for her. I was optimistic when I started out, but after visiting a few jewelry stores reality took hold. Everything I saw that I liked, far outstripped my $400 budget several folds. I was giving up and stopped by The Elegant Lady to talk with Shelly, maybe she would have an idea. And she did. I sat with Shelly sipping tea and told her my problem, and she knew just what to do. "I've got just the place to go, and she grabbed her purse. I don't have any appointments this afternoon, and Marty can handle the shop, let's go. And before I knew what we were doing or where we were going, we were in her car and heading down the highway. "We need to get away from the city, and away from the jewelry stores. They don't have anything to impress Vivian, but I know a place that does." We drove west of the city for 40 miles and exited beyond the surrounding suburbs and drove another 5 miles into a small town. From what I could see, there were ten buildings in the downtown area. There were three gas stations, two small restaurants, a hardware store, a drug store, a doctor's office and two shops simply labeled 'Antiques'. Shelly parked in front of the last building and headed towards the front doors. I'd never been in a place like this and allowed Shelly to take the lead. On the door of the first building was stenciled in gold lettering, 'Forgotten Memories' and the second door read, 'Remembered Treasures'. We passed by the first door with Shelly saying, "They are more into furniture and household good. Interesting, but not what we're after." When we entered the second building, I went into sensory overload. There were display cases and shelves stocked and stacked with an incredible variety of antique 'stuff'. I didn't have a clue as to what we were looking for or where to begin, but Shelly was right on it. "Follow me. There's several booths near the back where vendors specialize in jewelry. They have some great stuff, and it's reasonably priced." I just followed behind, not really having a clue about where she was taking me, but when we made it to the rear art of the store, there it was. Case upon case of jewelry spanning the range from costume trinkets to genuine antique jewels. Necklaces, bracelets, ear rings and rings, it was all there. I couldn't believe how much was there, and how would I ever find anything and know what I was buying. But that was where Shelly stepped in again. "You can ignore most of what you see. You want to focus on these cases here. These are all genuine antiques and the stones are all real. If I understand what you said about what you want, don't look at the biggest stones first, look at the ring as a whole. I think you'll find that the prettiest rings have smaller stones but better craftsmanship and design." Shelly's advice turned out to be right on track. It was easy to be taken in by the larger stones, but if you looked away and looked back ignoring the stones you could appreciate the ring. I spent the next hour sorting through the cases looking at every ring I could find with an emerald. In the end, I had selected three rings from which to choose. Up until then, I had ignored the prices, but was taken back when I did look. While the rings were all much less expensive than what I was used to seeing in the jewelry store they were all above my $400 goal. Each of the rings was priced closer to $600, but Shelly said not to worry, here, we can negotiate. I looked at Shelly, more than a bit confused, and let her take the lead. "Trust me, if we'd driven out here in a BMW or Mercedes, you'd have to pay full price, or close to it. They're used to the city crowd coming out here for a bargain, but they also realize most of their customers are of lessor means. We drove out here in my eight-year-old Ford and believe me, they checked it out. You pick out the ring and leave it to me." It took another hour before I could choose the ring. All three had emeralds as a center stone, one was round cut and was set in a bed of small crystals, the second one was heart shaped and sat on a raised setting, and the third one was pear shaped with two tiny diamonds on either side. In the end, I chose the ring with the round cut stone. It seemed to have the most sparkle, but the biggest thing was the sculpting of the band it was elegant, very 1930s style the age of elegance. From that point, it was up to Shelly. She talked the sales lady at the front desk and there was some good-natured bantering between them. I stood back watching and listening, feeling almost embarrassed. I had never seen bargaining like this, Shelly was a tiger going after the prey, and the sales lady was the protector. The original price was $550 and I heard Shelly offer $200 and the saleslady comedown to $500 early in the discussion, but from there, I lost track. After several minutes, I heard the number $400 and thought I was home free, but Shelly wasn't ready to give up. I watched as the sales lady picked up her phone and dialed. Shelly took me by the hand and led me out on the porch. "Now we're getting somewhere. She's calling the person who owns the ring to see what their bottom line is. She had quite a lot authority to come down, but I've asked for more. Don't worry, she'll come back with a better price." I tried to tell her we were already at my budget, but she shushed me. "Remember, you have to pay sales tax." I sassed back telling her I thought I could cover the tax, but she shushed me again. "Here she comes. You just watch." The sales lady poked her head out the door and we returned to the shop. "OK, I've talked to the owner and she's willing to come down a bit. $375, and that's her bottom line. I didn't think she would even do that, but there you go." Before Shelly could say a word, I spoke for the first time. "I'll take it!" And they both broke out laughing. We walked up to the counter and the lady wrote up the sales ticket. "OK, here you go, with tax, it comes to $401.25" I dug in my purse and pulled out the envelope with the $400 in it and handed it to the sales lady. While she counted it out, I dug further and pulled five quarters out of my change purse. When I laid the quarters on the counter, Shelly broke out laughing. "It's a good thing you don't need bus fare home. I don't think you'd make it." Before we left for home, Shelly pulled me into one of the restaurants. "It's dinner time... my treat." I tried to tell her I could pay for it, but she refused. "Consider it part of my wedding present. I don't know when I've had so much fun." Shelly and I entered the door of Annie's Caf? and were immediately surrounded by wonderful aromas. We didn't even look at the menu. Shelly took a deep breath enjoying what ever it was and that's what she ordered. "Whatever you're cooking that's producing that incredible aroma... I'll have it." I just nodded my agreement. The waitress whose name tag just happen to say, 'Annie', smiled, "It's spicy tomato bisque with grilled southwest chicken breast. Today's special. It's served with deep fried onion petals with cheesy salsa dipping sauce." Shelly and I ordered sweet tea to go with our meals and waited patiently. While we sat there, my cell phone started buzzing and beeping. I looked at the screen and there were three missed calls, all from Vivian, and now a text message. I decided to read the text rather than listen to the voice mail. "Ignoring me??? I hate you! LOL. Last minute schedule change. Flying to Detroit. Back tomorrow dinner time. Plan something to surprise me. Love Ya." I showed the text to Shelly. "This is great. I think I've got the perfect way to surprise her now!" It didn't take much thought for me to plan a dinner at Eugenia's. It had become our go to spot, especially for special events. Since Vivian was flying in on a charter, I only had to pick her up at the executive airport, saving us both a lot of grief. Her plane landed just after 6:30 and by 7:00 we were enjoying a glass of wine. We both enjoyed grilled salmon and creamed rice and were enjoying strawberry ice for dessert when I pulled out my surprise. "Do you remember the when you brought me here for brunch after the reveal of my paintings in the lobby? You gave me something special." Vivian just grinned. "How could I ever forget? It was the best day of my life... at up until now. But we've got a lot of life to live yet, don't we?" I couldn't help but have a goofy grin on my face, this was just as I'd planned, and Vivian could see it. "What? I know you're up to something, so what is it?" I reached into my purse and pulled out the small green box which held the ring. I took her hand and placed the box in it. "When you proposed to me, it was the happiest day of my life, and you gave me this beautiful ring that's on my finger. But I need to give you something as well, something that you can wear as a reminder of my love and devotion to you." As Vivian opened the box and looked at the ring, her mouth fell open and tears flowed down her cheeks. "Oh my... how, why, what have you done? This is gorgeous! It's amazing!" She slid the ring on her finger and was on her feet, almost throwing herself into my arms. When she landed in my lap, the chair tipped over and we fell in a heap on the floor. We were kissing and crying and the whole restaurant was on their feet. Three waitresses surrounded us helping us to our feet and making sure we were OK. When we got to our feet, Vivian held her hand high showing the ring and everyone was cheering and applauding. Eugenia herself stopped by to see what the ruckus was all about. "If you two keep this up, I'm going to have to ban you from the restaurant! This is the second time you've created a stir." Then she hugged us and tore up the bill. The week before the wedding, things got crazy. My parents arrived in town on Monday evening. Even though mother had been deeply involved in the wedding planning, most of it was via conference calls. Now she wanted to jump in and make sure everything was up to her expectations. She was a perfectionist and would settle for nothing less. While daddy was excited as well, he was doing his best trying to stay out of the way and turning mother loose with the credit cards. Tuesday afternoon, I had the final dress fitting, just to make sure everything was done, and the fit was perfect, which it was. I think mother's eyes were wet throughout the fitting. Shelly ask her over an over again for any changes or tweaks that might be needed. Mother would look and check and say it was perfect. The only change mother suggested was for the veil. There was a small silver comb which fastened the veil to my hair, and mother thought it just a bit small. "I think it the comb should be a bit larger, a little more elegant." Shelly stepped back for minute and then nodded. "I think I've got a couple you can choose from that will make a bit more of a statement." She reached into a display case and pulled out the combs for mother to review. It didn't take long, and mother picked out a comb she liked. It was only a bit larger than the original one but was embellished with a row of crystals with seed pearls. Mother was pleased, and I agreed, it was lovely. Vivian had taken the entire week off from work and had gone for her final fitting early in the morning, so by late afternoon, we both had our dresses. That was the last major hurdle and everything else should fall into place. We had planned a dinner with all our parents for us to talk about any last-minute details. The biggest detail was to work out the procession to the alter. Vivian and I had taken the unique approach of asking our mothers to be our brides maids. So, the two of them would be walking down the aisle together. We had selected very stylish dresses in a color called rose quartz. The dress had cap sleeves and a round neckline. They had natural waistlines and were cocktail length ending at mid-calf. For jewelry they would wear simple pearls. For the next step Vivian would be escorted down the aisle by her father and then daddy would escort me. Both our fathers would wear stylish dove grey tuxedoes with vests and bow ties matching the color of our mothers' dresses. There really weren't to many decisions needed to be made, but it gave us all a chance to be together and talk. While our parents were all very supportive there was still a bit of nervousness. There was still the great unknown as to how some people might view our marriage. We had been selective in who we invited, but neither of us had been hiding anything. People who knew us, knew who we were, truly in love and meant to be. But I was more worried about the few relatives of mine who were flying in from California. Aunt Nellie and Uncle John were coming and bringing my cousin Lisa and her husband Tom. Also, Aunt Mabel and Uncle Mark were coming with their son and daughter, Abby and Mitch. I was a bit concerned about this as they used to tease me endlessly when I was growing up. While my mother told me that they had matured since then, I was still worried. So far, these were all relatives from my mother's side. Daddy had been an only child, so there were no aunts, uncles or cousins, but his parents were still alive and planning to attend. They had always been my biggest supporters when I was growing up telling me often that "I should be myself and nothing more". They were now in their 80s but still my biggest fans. Daddy told me when he explained the wedding to them, they thought it was wonderful. So, in the end, my worries were minimal. Vivian's side of the equation was a bit larger, but just as easy to deal with. She had four aunts and three uncles all with spouses and 23 cousins along with 5 spouses and five additional kids. Our plan was for them to all get together, my relatives and hers for a get to know you BBQ on Thursday afternoon. We secured a pavilion at a local park and for simplicity sake, had it catered. It was ribs and chicken, and hot dog and hamburgers with lots of side dishes. There was also a lot of soda and beer. It turned out to be the best thing we could have done. While there were a few tentative moments initially, by the time we wrapped up in the early evening, we were acting like one big family. Since we had so much family coming from out of town, we planned for several different activities on Friday to keep them entertained. There were trips to the zoo, the botanical gardens, the art museum, and natural history museum. It turns out there was something for everybody and they all kept busy while the wedding rehearsal was taking place. Then, rather than a rehearsal dinner, we hosted a cocktail party for the entire group. Again, it was the best thing we could have done. While everybody was excited for the wedding, this was yet another way to bring the family together. XII Finally, the big day arrived. Vivian and I had left after the cocktail party, shared a kiss and went to spend our last night apart. She would be staying at her condo while I was in the guest bedroom at the house. But tonight, we would share the master suite as newlyweds. Vivian would be getting ready with the help of her mother and Shelly for the dress, and Madeline from Belle Claire for hair and makeup. I would be getting help from my mother and Marty, along with Michelle and Lisa from Belle Claire. After all, it was our wedding, and we decided we needed to be pampered a bit. And that extended to our mothers. They were to enjoy the pampering as well. Michelle set my hair in large barrel rollers and sprayed my head with setting lotion. She then placed a large bonnet over my head and set the drying temperature so a warm breeze blew through my hair. "We want your hair to dry, not bake." While my hair dried, Michelle turned her attention to mother, while Lisa began working on my makeup. She started with a light covering of foundation to even my skin tone. She wiped most of it away, making sure my skin looked even. Then she went to work with an air brush spraying on a delicate lay of powdered makeup that gave a subtle glow to my skin. Changing to a smaller air brush she sprayed on several colors to create contouring of my cheeks, highlighting my cheek bones, and softening the shape of my nose and chin. She finished this step spraying on sealer to help keep the look in place over the long day to come. Lisa gave me a five-minute break while Michelle took the dryer off my hair. "It's almost done, so we'll leave it air dry and cool while Lisa finishes her work. Then we'll pull out the rollers and make magic." Starting on my eyes, Lisa applied mascara to my lashes and then added extensions. "I want Vivian to melt when you batt your lashes at her. I'm going to back your lashes with liquid liner that will be incredibly sexy. Then I've chosen a palette of colors for eye shadow that will really make your green eyes sparkle." Lisa gave me another break, but, promised the final touch up would happen once my dress was in place. Then, she turned her attention to mother, who had just had her hair finished. Michelle made an elegant sweep with a final spray of mother's hair and turned back to me. "OK girl, are you ready to get gorgeous?" Within minutes, the roller were out, the brush and comb flying and I was enveloped in a cloud of hair spray. Then came the curling irons, a large barrel one used along the sides and back, and a much smaller one use on the crown of my head. And more and more hair spray. When the dust settled, my hair looked spectacular. It fell from the crown of my head in a cascade of soft curls. On the very top, the curls were tighter and would provide the cushion where my veil would sit. I sat looking in the mirror spellbound. I could not find the words to express what I was feeling. But at last, mother broke the spell. Alright princess, time for your dress. Time is running short." While I was ready for my dress, I wasn't ready for what was next. "Deep breath." And Marty pulled firmly on the laces of my corset. I took the breath, but it was immediately force out again by the crushing affect as she pulled the laces even tighter than I remembered. "Get ready, one more pull. Deep breath and exhale." And before I could react the corset pulled me further in its grip. "This is the bridal corset you chose. Remember when we first tried it on you. It was snug then, but this one is an inch smaller in the waist. When you get your dress on, your figure is going to be eye popping." I knew Marty wasn't lying, because my eyes were already popping out. I remember when I picked out my bridal lingerie and she and Shelly had first crushed me with the corset saying the laces had pulled the corset completely shut and she would order in a smaller one. But this was not what I expected. When Marty finally tied off the laces I stood for a minute or two just catching my breath. Slowly, the crushing feeling relaxed a bit as my body adjusted, and then I was ready for my dress. Marty and mother bunched the dress and held it over my head allowing it to slide down over my body, and the feeling as the material fell into place was magnificent. As Marty pulled up the zipper, I felt the dress hug me, and I knew that without the smaller corset it would not have fit. Mother continued to hold the skirt up at waist level, and Marty placed the crinolines on the floor and helped me as I carefully stepped into them. Slowly, allowing the material to take its shape the crinolines were raised to my waist and secured there. Only then did Marty help mother to lower my dress to its full length. They both fussed with it a bit, making sure it lay just right and while mother held my hand, Marty set my shoes down and had me step into them. "We need to get you into these, so you don't step on the hem." Time was passing quickly, and I was nervous about being ready in time for the ceremony. But mother assured me there was plenty of time. While I stood there admiring the dress in the mirror, Michelle came to fluff up my hair, and as mother held my veil, Michelle fitted the comb holding it in place. Then mother allowed the veil to settle into place gently falling to my waist. Lisa was there to touch up my lips, and when she stepped back, I saw myself as a bride. As I looked in the mirror, a single tear escaped the corner of my eye, and when I turned my entire little entourage all were teared up as well. Michelle and Lisa fussed over mother touching up her hair and makeup, making sure everything was perfect. As they did, Marty peaked out the door. "OK ladies, it looks like we have a full house, and all we need is the brides." She held the door open for Michelle and Lisa to make their way out and then stepped back allowing daddy to step in. This was the moment that worried be the most. Daddy had come a long way over the years, and much further recently, but was he ready for this. I didn't have to wait long for my answer. As he looked at me, first making an overall appraisal then meeting me eye to eye, he couldn't hide the tear rolling down his cheek. "Stunning! You are absolutely gorgeous." And he hugged tightly. Then, daddy turned his attention to mother. "My lovely wife, you're as beautiful as the day I married you." And there were tears all around. Marty quickly handed out tissues, and carefully blotted my tears preserving my makeup. And then it was time. Marty scurried out the door to find her seat, and I could hear the first strains of our chosen music. Mother was first out the door and met Diane in the small ante-room of the chapel. The shared a quick hug and turned for their walk down the aisle side by side. As I watched our mothers walk down the aisle, I didn't see Vivian and her father make their entry. But when I turned my head back, there they were, and I had to fight back the tears. I had dreamed about what Vivian's dress would look like, and it went beyond anything I had envisioned. I started with the color. Her dress was champagne colored and covered with delicate lace. It was strapless with a sweetheart neckline, fitted to the waist and over her hips, showing off her amazing figure. Above the knees the dress flared dramatically ending in a short trailing train. Instead of a traditional veil, Vivian wore a fascinator trimmed with matching lace, satin ribbons and netting. Overall, she was the picture of elegance. I stood quietly, as Grant took Vivian's arm as her processional music started. We had decided on a string ensemble to provide the music rather than the traditional organ. She had selected excerpts from Allegro Maetoso from Handel's Water Music, adding to the elegance of her entrance. As they made their way down the aisle, daddy and I took our place in the anteroom. Once Vivian was in place in front of the alter, her music quietly ended, and it was my turn. Although not traditional, the opening strains of Fur Elise welcomed my walk down the aisle. As daddy took my arm, we took our first steps. I looked to the front of the chapel and saw our mothers, and Vivian waiting and watching, and I could see Vivian's eyes widen. When we reached the alter and the music stopped, daddy moved my veil and gave me a kiss saying, "Your mother and I are so proud!" Then he stepped aside, and I turned to face Vivian, taking her hands in mine, and then turning to face the minister. The next minutes seemed to fly by as we exchanged vows and before I realized, the minister was announcing "It is my great pleasure to introduce Kellie and Vivian Clark-Burke. You may kiss." And we did. We kissed and kissed as the applauds filled the chapel. We stood for a minute or two, not wanting the moment to end. Then, as our recessional music began we walked down the steps of the alter. As the ensemble played the overture for The Royal Fireworks we made our way out of the Chapel stopping on the lawn where we were joined by our parents. We stood there as a wedding party and greeted the guests as they exited the Chapel then winding their way through the gardens eventually making their way to the mansion where the reception would be held. Once the last guests were greeted, the photographer was there to begin taking pictures. So, backing the Chapel we went with our parents and the minister. When finally, we were done in the Chapel, it was off to the gardens for more pictures and then off to the reception. The reception was incredible and again, it seemed to pass by far to quickly. We danced our first dance to the classic The Way You Look Tonight, and then Paul Stookey's The Wedding Song and at last, Can't Help Falling In Love with You. During these last two songs we were joined by our parents changing partners until we all had turns together and ending up in three couples again. The reception lasted until well after midnight and Vivian and I danced with everyone there. When the music ended the crowd seemed both happy and sad. Happy for Vivian and me, but sad to leave. But before Vivian and I made our way out to the limo that would take us home, we invited anyone who wished, to stop by the house the next afternoon for brunch. "But not before 2 PM, we'll be busy til then!" The limo ride was 40 minutes and seemed much longer. We could have stayed someplace closer but wanted to share our first married night in our own suite. By the time we arrived we were ready to attack each other. We made it to the front door and stopped to kiss, then again as we closed the door behind us. We shed our heels at the bottom of the stairway and hiked up our skirts to ease our climb. Opening the doors to our suite we walked in hand in hand stopping just inside again to kiss. Vivian turned to me and I to her and we hugged tightly, neither of us wanting to let go. I whispered in her ear, "Is this all real?" She responded by pushing me onto the bed and climbing on top. "Does this feel real?" and she kissed me deeply. We had to get back out of the bed to remove our gowns and set them aside, but we were soon naked in bed with our bodies tangled. We made love slowly, allowing the passion to build. And build it did. I felt her body shake as Vivian reached her climax and just seconds later my body spasmed as I followed her to extasy. We held each other, our grip slowly relaxing as we both fell into a deep sleep. We woke early the next morning buoyed by our need to make love again and a healthy dose of adrenalin. Our energy rose to a level I had never known. Our passion rose again and again, leaving us spent. Finally we made our way out of bed and into the shower. For several minutes we washed and softly caressed each other, but our time was limited. We needed time to pull ourselves together before friends and family arrived for brunch. Managing to get dressed and downstairs only minutes ahead of the caterers arriving, we made coffee and toast to sustain us. When the caterers did arrive, they set up shop in the kitchen preparing the food and setting up the dining room and studio garden for friends and family to mingle. While they were busy getting things organized, Vivian and I took our coffee to the outside garden and enjoyed the late morning sun. At some point, we both dozed, waking only when our parents arrived. Over the course of the afternoon, over 100 friends and family members stopped by to share time and wish us well. We all shared hugs and smiles and even some tears when it was time for them to leave. It was such a wonderful way to share our excitement and enjoy the company, but in the end, we were totally exhausted and collapsed in the seating area of the garden with just our parents. We all sat quietly for several minutes lost in our own thoughts. It was daddy who finally broke the silence. "So, we haven't heard anything about a honeymoon. What do the two of you have planned this week, I mean other than the obvious?" Which earned him a punch in the arm from mother. Vivian and I both laughed it off, and her parents weren't offended, so we let it go. But, we did owe them an explanation. I looked to Vivian and let her explain. "We're going to spend the next week getting settled in here at the house. We've got movers packing up my condo tomorrow and moving everything here. I've already got a buyer, so that won't be hanging over our heads. Then next weekend we're going to fly to Vegas for three days. We've got tickets for two shows and we might gamble just a bit. Neither of us are really interested in gambling, but we figure you can't go to Vegas and not gamble a bit. Then, we're going to settle into life together. We still have a lot of growing together to do. Then we've planned a couple of trips later in the year. The end of August we're going to take an Alaskan cruise, and in between Thanksgiving and Christmas we're going to take a week in Hawaii." So, this is where my story ends, and our life begins. Vivian and I have a wonderful life together. She has continued her career as an attorney, and after almost two years of work, I finished the four pieces of art for Don and Sharron Warren. I also found a job as assistant to the curator of the art museum. Its only a part time job but provides me with a steady income that keeps me from feeling that Vivian is supporting us both. It also allows me plenty of free time to continue painting. That's important because I've accepted two more commissions for four seasons paintings. One, for a friend of daddy who has property near Big Sur, and another for a business associate of Don's who live in Northern Minnesota. Vivian and I travel a lot and we visit my parents often, mostly in the winter to get away from the cold and snow. They come visit in Chicago during the summer. We've been to France and England and we're planning a trip to Australia. Sometimes, I pinch myself. I could never have imagined life turning out like it has. It's better than any dream I every had and I thank Vivian everyday for being there for me and being the love of my life.