If I Could Turn Back Time. free porn video

If I could turn back time. CBA Hello, my name is Thomas and I wish I could be a woman. I've wanted to be a woman since I was maybe nine years old. But unfortunately, I started puberty by then too. By the time I was ten I had pubic hair and had started my growth spurt. At thirteen I could already grow a beard and I was 6ft tall (my height to this day). Now in today's world 6ft tall might not be all that above average for a thirteen-year-old, but back in the early 80's it certainly was. I was above average when compared to all my classmates and only saw others approach my height three or four years later. I was also a fairly aware child in that I knew about transsexuals and had secretly collected anything I could find about the matter. So I had both the Hustler magazine with Shannon and the Playboy with Roberta Close and would spend hours enviously looking at what they had achieved. Much much later, like many people I guess, I joined the internet once I saw how things could be searched and I could then view a much larger world of post-op transsexual women. So here's the rub. I was always too fearful to take action on my desires. Too cowardly to follow my dreams. And besides right or wrong, I didn't want to be an ugly girl, I have always wanted to be an attractive beautiful girl and my early puberty really messed with any confidence I might have had. ********** A career in the sciences is not a way to get rich or to have fame, it has to be about the passion for learning new things, seeing how the universe works. Or in my case a dream to fulfill. Working on quantum physics and applied sciences had brought me much frustration and anguish. So many failures, so many disappointments. But then science stumbled across a possible method of time travel via artificially created wormholes. I knew that I had to be in on that work! I made myself invaluable, I worked and collaborated with anyone who I thought might give me access and I made sure that the powers that be knew that I was a team player and to be trusted. My plans worked. *********** Getting everything ready, I knew I would likely only have one chance at this, and so I had collected everything I would need to be waiting and ready when the opportunity presented itself. *********** Emerging into the past in 1979 was..... interesting. I guess I had almost forgotten just how innocent a time things were, so I didn't really have a problem getting a car without a single piece of ID. Getting paper cash together for the purchase wasn't even all that difficult either. All I had to do was gamble on a few sporting events, the outcome of which I knew was certain. I have to say the increased incidence of smoking drove me up the wall, but I dealt with it as best I could because I had a dream to fulfill. I staked out my old hangouts, which wasn't that difficult, as my younger self had been given a motorcycle for my seventh birthday in 78, and so all I had to do was wait for my eight-year-old self to go off riding the bike. Approaching myself was the tricky part. There's no way the younger me would recognize myself, in my fifties I was certainly unrecognizable. But I had been pretty high strung whenever I got on that bike (or the four more I bought on my own with summer jobs as I got older. I LOVED to ride motorcycles back then.) But in the end, I simply followed my younger self out of the small town and then honked my horn as soon as we were out of sight of any of the townspeople. Sure enough, the younger me pulled over to see what all the excitement was about? "What do you want?" The younger me enquired. "I have something I want to show you!" And I then unlocked an iPad and showed a bunch of pictures, pictures showing my younger selfs past, present, and future until the pictures matched the guy sitting in the car in front of the younger me. "That thing is so cool! And you are really me?!? How old are you?" I could sense an underlying feeling of disappointment, I couldn't blame the younger me at all. "Yup I really am you when you get older, I'm pretty old!" "You're bald! How is it that you are here?" "Yup, we start losing our hair pretty early. I have come to see you in my past because I have something important to explain, and I want to offer you or rather us an opportunity for happiness." "Ok.... You want to go somewhere private?" Like I said, my younger self was pretty aware, even at that age. "Yes, exactly." "Ok, follow me!" And my younger self went racing off on the 80cc Yamaha dirt bike, rear tire spinning. I could tell the young guy was now excited. We ended up pulling off onto a dirt trail that led off of the road and into some woods. We parked deep into the tree line where we couldn't be easily observed: "This should do perfectly." "Ok, now what?" the younger me asked. "Alright, this is going to sound crazy, but here we go. Next year you are going to start puberty and this is going to start changing your body into a man. But also, you are going to start wishing that you could be a girl." Showing trust after seeing the tablet and the pictures that showed who I was, my younger self confided "I, I already wish I could be a girl." "You do! Ok, I couldn't remember exactly when I first had those desires, all I could remember was master-bating when I was nine and wishing and imagining I could be a girl when I did it." "Master-bating?" "Ya, ummm it's a form of touching yourself that can be very pleasurable, but it also may have bump started my puberty. But the thing is, you are going to be starting puberty in the next year or so." "Ok, so what can I do?" "Well, there are surgical and chemical ways that boys can become girls. Maybe not 100%, for example, you would never be able to give birth to children, but in particular, the outside of your body can be changed to be like a girl, like a woman, just like how you feel on the inside." "Oh! That would be so cool!" "Yes, yes it would be very cool! But there are some things that you need to know. First, it's very painful, and it takes a long long time to have everything done. Two, the surgeries are good in this time frame, but they get much better later as doctors gain more experience with the techniques. Three, I don't know if any of your friends or family will accept you if you become a girl, but I'm telling you, and I'm sorry to say, but you will never truly be happy living as a boy or a man." "Oh." "Here is what I can promise. I have things I will leave here with you that will help you by laying out and showing what you can do to succeed in becoming a woman. Also, I will give you information so that you should be able to make lots and lots of money. Money you will need to pay for your changes and to help live a good life." My younger self was nodding their head hopefully. "But there is no guarantee of what will happen in the future if you are successful in becoming a woman, just by being here I am changing our future, so I think you will need to follow my career path as best you can so that you can come back and talk to our younger self about going through with the changes." "Wow, this is just like a science fiction story!" (Our favorite kinds of books.) "Ha ha, yes it is!" "I want to do it!" "Ok, I have a few more things that can only help us become a girl, but it will make big changes in your life right away." "What?" "Well if we castrate you and then you take these" I held up female hormone patches "these will kick start your female puberty. By the time your body starts to change, well then mom and the doctors will have no choice but to listen to our desires and help us." "I don't want to be in pain...." "I know, but I have some things that will help you, and after maybe a week or two you will be fine. It's up to you though, I can only tell you what can help make us happy, I'm not going to force anything." "Ok, let's do it!" "Alright! So I will need to set up some things in a motel room, so how about we do this tomorrow? I will meet you here at say 9 am, you tell mom that you'll be gone for the day, and I should be able to have you back well before supper and mom will be none the wiser." "Ok 9 am!" "Alright! See you then." "Bye!" "Bye!" and I watched the younger me ride off, excitement and joy on his face. I had the same expression. The next morning I could hear the bike minutes before I saw my younger self come riding into the woods, he was on time and had the biggest most hopeful grin glued on his face. It was contagious, we were taking the next steps to make our dreams come true. "Hope in, be ready to duck down as we drive to the motel, don't want anyone questioning why a young boy they might know is riding with someone they don't. When we get there, wait until I tell you to move from the car and into the room. I don't want to scare you, so be prepared to see the room prepared for the procedure. It's very hospital looking right now." "Ok!" "Ready to go?" "Yes!" "Here as we drive, you can take a look at this tablet if you like. I have a few of these I'm going to leave with you. You can use it to review and help practice anything you find interesting or to provide help so you can try things you want to do. For example, there are saved video's and articles on how to apply and wear makeup, or how to dress as a woman, or how to talk, or move, or lots of other things that it takes to be a woman. It'll be a long time before you'll have access to this kind of technology and information in the wild, so I want to give you a leg up by giving you early access. I'm going to give you several of these tablets so that if one breaks or the batteries start to go, you can have backups. Many of the help guides will also be on paper as well so that you can refer to them when out in public if required, especially where it would be difficult to hide the tablets. It'll be very important that you protect and hide the existence of theses tablets, nothing like this will exist for at least another thirty years or so! I will also provide you with enough hormones to last you into your twenties, as well as some equipment that can help you to pass until you start to get your surgeries, things like gaffs, false silicone breasts, and other such items. Lastly, I've already bought a long term storage unit to store everything. I found one that still exists in my time, so we know it'll be safe for your things to be stored there until you are ready to use them." I'm not sure how much of that my younger self picked up on, I should have given him the tablet 'after' I briefed him. "This thing is so cool! I love how I can just move my finger, and things on the glass part move too!" That's ok, I'll brief him several times before I leave to ensure he'll have everything committed to memory. As we pulled into the motel parking lot, he was watching a video on how to help people understand transsexual's and hopefully help avoid abuse or bullying. I was glad he chose that one, as he was almost certainly going to be exposed to that in his future. "Wait here, I'll go open the door, and then I'll come back to walk you into the room." He was already wearing a dress and had a wig on his head, I figured the disguise would survive anyone glancing our way by chance, but if anyone got to close..... who knows? Once I had the door opened, a quick glance to confirm there was no one else around, so I went back to the car, held the door open and then helped him out. It looked like I was escorting a date into my room. It had to be intimidating, but he walked right in despite the surgical equipment and the needles on display. "Go into the bathroom and take a shower. There's medical disinfectant soap that I want you to use on this area." (I motioned to the crotch area.) Be very thorough as it will help prevent infections. When you are done, dry the same area with the green towel, it's especially clean and will help avoid infections as well. You can then put on the surgical gown, and then come out here and lay down on the bed with your back on these pillows. Questions?" "No." And he walked into the bathroom, where I could soon hear the shower running. I put on disposable scrubs and a face mask, rechecked everything for the fifth time by the time he came out of the bathroom smelling of antiseptic soap. As he laid down he looked at me with some fear in his eyes "Like this?" "Yes, that is perfect. So I want to ask you again, are you sure this is what you want?" "Yes, I want to be a girl. I really really want to be a girl!" "Yes, I really wish I had been able to grow up a girl too!" Pulling my mask down over my mouth and nose, I then pulled on some disposable gloves. "Ok, I'm going to give you something to numb the area, it's not safe or required to knock you out. If you want to watch you can, or you can look away if you like, it shouldn't take too long to perform the orchiectomy, sorry, that word means to remove your testicles. Do you want some music?" In a little voice, obviously nervous and a bit scared "No music thank you." "Ok, please keep your legs apart, I'll warn you, this needle is going to hurt for just a bit. Please try to be quiet, we don't need anyone investigating weird noises or anything.... and here we go...." my younger self was whimpering but stoically taking the pain "just a couple more seconds..... and.... that's done. Ok, we'll give it 5-10 minutes to ensure full numbness, here I'll just lay this sheet over you while we wait. You are doing great." Within a minute "I can't feel anything down there anymore, it was like pins and needles at first but now there's nothing". "That's good! But we'll wait another five minutes to 100% ensure that you won't feel any discomfort or pain. That would suck!" "Ya! So will there be much pain after they are gone?" "There will be some for a while and you won't be back to full comfort for a couple weeks or more, but I think you'll be able to ride the bike soon enough. I checked and starting tomorrow they are calling for rain for at least the next week or so. Should give you a good excuse to hang around and watch TV while mom is home, but when she's at work you can watch videos on the tablet. It'll be a good idea to start practicing some of the things right away so that whenever you decide to come out you can start with some experience." "Come out?" "Well you can tell mom you are a girl whenever you want, but I would suggest you wait until you start to show secondary female characteristics. Perhaps in a year or two or whenever you start taking the hormones in greater quantities. If you follow my recommendations, you will only be taking very small amounts of hormones for at least the next year, more would be better. Give your body time to adjust to the missing testosterone, and then ease into the estrogen. Whatever you do, don't take to much! Too much can give you cancer and cause other problems, so make sure you follow the guidelines found on the tablets and I made a paper copy of that as well. Ok, can you feel anything I'm doing?" "Nope, completely numb down there." "You want to watch, or do I keep this covered?" "I want to watch. I want to always remember the day I started to become a girl." "Ok! I'm so excited too. Alright, let me tape your penis to your tummy like so, and this is some antiseptic solution I'll wipe around the surgical site. And..... now I'll make the first incision like so, a small amount of blood is to be expected, but see nothing too bad." I quietly talked as I continued to work on removing my younger selfs testicles, and when he asked, I showed him what they looked like after I had cut both of them free from our body. "After we're done, I'll give you some gloves and you can hold and feel them if you like?" "No, that's ok." "Alright, I just need to finish suturing things up, I want to take my time to minimize scarring. I figure you'll like a nice clean look, and though I'm not completely sure if it will matter later, I figure in the future if you get gender reassignment it can only help if there is only good healthy scar-free skin down here." As I worked I continued explaining "You see to create a vagina, the surgeons will use the skin of this area to make it. The penile skin becomes the vaginal canal, your scrotum here becomes the labia, and the tip of your penis will be turned into your clitoris. So you see it's important that you take care of what you have as it will be essential in your future. There, that should do it, not too bad if I say so myself!" "Ya, that looks good...." "Here, I'm just going to apply a bit more antiseptic onto the incision site, and another needle to help fight off infections, and then a small bandage, like so... Ok. So you will need to avoid getting this area wet for the next three days, after that it will be ok, but then ensure you dry it as best you can. The sutures are the kind that dissolves and should fall out on there own. Here are some spare bandages, and some feminine pads to place in your underwear for the next while. We don't want mom to see any blood in your underwear, she might start asking questions. Make sure you bury the bandages and pads in the garbage, again we don't want mom asking questions!" "Ok." "Here is some Tylenol, take only one every 4 hours if you're in any pain. So what I'd like to do is hang out here for a while until the local starts to wear off. You will be in some pain, but I want to make sure you don't pee yourself or anything, as the numbness might make it difficult to know when you have to go. I will give you something else that's a bit stronger than the Tylenol for the ride back and so you can also ride your motorbike back home. That's going to be the tricky part as straddling your seat is going to aggravate the site something fierce." "Will I see you again?" "I don't think so. I'm pretty sure I will be grounded from the program that gave me this opportunity. But that's ok, this is the only reason I ever truly wanted to come back in time. It's all so I could make our dreams come true so that you can live a better happier life then what I had. Already you have proven to be braver than I ever thought I was." "What will happen to you?" "I don't know, I've already drastically altered my past, I think that is why you will need to ensure that you come back and do this again to yourself in your own timeline, or else it will be like it never happened, and then we probably get reset back to where we are now. I have left a diary as best I could recall that shows how I was able to work on the projects and get myself assigned to the first travel back in time. To be fair, you might experience some discrimination as a woman or as a transsexual woman, but I believe that 'where there is a will there is a way', and that you will be able to live our dream and make it happen again, only it will be a female future self who comes back next time. I'm so excited about that possibility." "Thank you! Thank you for doing this!" "It is purely self-serving, but your welcome! Here let me show you all the things available on the tablet." And so I showed my younger self the recommended schedules, ideas for when to do or start certain parts of transition, and the expected timings and outcomes. I showed the videos, the thing's like "how to's", for example, woman's fashion: Makeup, skincare, jewelry, clothing, shoes. Or examples of changing the pitch of the voice, or ways to talk or move that appear more naturally feminine. There was also some sexual "how-to" content. My younger self would most certainly need to know how to have sexual relations as a pre-op transsexual and maybe later a post-op. The "how-to" videos gave pointers on how to practice, prepare, make it safer and more pleasurable for the 'bottom'. I put age locks on the "how-to" sexual content that would be accessed by a reminder that was set to alarm when my younger self turned twelve (I was twelve when I almost had sex the first time, so that could definitely happen again). Though twelve is still a pretty young age, I had been thinking about such things since I was nine years old on my original timeline. No point in passing on wisdom if it's too late for the recipient to receive it on time, and if my younger self was lucky, the new girl was going to have opportunities I could only dream of. "Ouch! Oh, that aches!" "Ok, obviously feeling is starting to return. Do you think you could go to the bathroom?" "Ya, I can go." "Ok, it'll be tender, but see if you can make your own way into the bathroom. Probably be easier to just sit down for now on. That will become your future anyway assuming you go the whole way." "Ooo ow ok ok I'm I'm alright." And my younger self walked slowly into the bathroom. I heard them drop the seat and shortly the sounds of making water. They washed their hands as to be expected before they came hobbling back out. "You know, I just had a thought. It might backfire so only use it if you must, but if when you get home and if mom happens to see you moving funny, just say you got hurt on the bike, but that you're going to be Ok. I don't think she would take you to see the doctor unless you asked to go, or if you didn't get better soon. Don't bring it up unless she asks, and maybe just stay in your room and say you are sleeping. I seem to recall that I did that quite a bit when I was your age myself." "Ya Ok." "So the storage unit is number 104. It is in the next town over on Princes Street, it's rented long term under your name and the combination code to access it is 13, 45, 78. By the time you need more hormones or anything else stored in there, mom should be letting you ride all over the place on your bike. You will then be able to go there on your own to collect as much as you need and whenever you need it. The only thing I can't account for is if you move. If for any reason mom should move you guys to another town further away, it'll be more difficult for you to access any of the supplies there until you turn sixteen and can drive a car on your own." "Ok." "Alright, I have written the most important things on these papers" and I handed them over to my younger self "that and everything else is on all the tablets. Each tablet works the same way and has identical information. There is plenty of storage so you can take your own videos and write your own diary. I suggest you do that to help your future self prepare for when they come back in time. We will now set up facial recognition on this tablet, but you need to remember the code to get into them, it is the same on all of them "TheFutureIsBright71". "That is so cool!" My younger self was impressed by the built-in facial recognition. "Oh ya, here is another feature that is cool. See these things here on the screen? They are called "Apps" and this app over here does virtual makeup. See, you start it up, select one of these makeup examples and then when you look into the camera it overlays the makeup onto your face. See, already, all you need is a bit of makeup and you already appear to be the girl you are going to become." "Thank you!" And my younger self gave me a hug. "I'm so proud of you, and I have no doubt you can make a happy life for yourself. Just continue to be brave like you've been today and you will be fine. Come on, I need to get you back so you can be home before mom gets back from work. And then I will need to get back myself." "What are you going to do with all this surgical stuff?" "When you go and put the dress back on in the bathroom (so I can sneak you out of here), I will bundle it all into these empty suitcases. Just before I leave, I'm going to set the car on fire and destroy everything. There should be no evidence of your castration or my identity when everything is said and done. People will only know when you are ready to tell them, or like I said when you start developing breasts, I expect it will be discovered then whether you like it or not. Now go get dressed. Oh and take this." I handed him an oral pain medication "It'll help with the pain until sometime tonight." As my younger self walked into the bathroom to change I quickly packaged up all the surgical tools, the sponges, threads, linen, and everything else I used for the surgery and placed all of it into the suitcases. When my younger self walked back out in the dress, I slipped inside to pee myself and then a quick check, 'Oh almost forgot the antiseptic soap!' Everything else looked good. "Ok, let me load the luggage into the car, and then I'll come back to escort you out." After loading the luggage, I looked around and noticed no one was watching, so I escorted my younger self back into the passenger seat, I then started the car and drove up to the manager's office where I simply dropped the key and then hopped back into the car and we were off. My younger self was back to watching "how-to" videos during the ride back. When we were back into the woods I took the dress and wig, they would be destroyed along with everything else in the car. "Here, these are some fairly powerful pain meds, so only take one tonight before bed and another 12 hours later if you must. There's only enough for a couple of days and then it'll just be the Tylenol, so only take these if you really need them Ok?" At his nod of understanding "This backpack is now yours, let's place your tablet inside like so, and now I think everything is complete and as ready as I can make it." "Thank you!" "You are most welcome. Here let me start your bike." The kicking motion would likely not be good right now. "I recommend that you stand up with your legs bowed out until you get onto the smooth road." With a happy smile "Bye!" and my younger self drove off. 'Wow, that went better then I ever hoped for.' With a smile on my own face, I drove the car to the town dump, as expected it was empty, so I was able to pour a can of gasoline in and on the car and then a match soon got it into a roaring blaze. 'Here goes nothing' and I clicked the hidden button on my watch activating the return signal. ********** Coming aware back in the lab, the first thing I was cognizant of was the pair of large breasts projecting off of my chest along with my full head of long hair pulled back tightly on my head. I could only assume it was styled into a bun (which was confirmed later). An attempt to remember my childhood and I recalled an older but still very attractive woman visiting me when I was only eight years old. She convinced me that she was my future self who had traveled back in time to help me start my dream of becoming a girl. She said her name was Teresa. My future self visiting me to help me become a girl and a woman was to remain my secret always. I had been able to hide my lack of testicles for several years, and it was only when I started taking hormones in greater amounts for about six months that I finally started growing a pair of breasts at thirteen. My mother was shocked, but when she questioned me what had happened, I only told her that despite her telling me my whole life "I'm so glad that I had a boy instead of a girl", that she was wrong. She had given birth to a girl all along, just that nature had made a mistake and I had made moves to correct it. I only hoped she could accept and love me. Of course, she could. I remember I was so happy my voice was never going to develop into a low masculine register and I was to remain free of chest and body hair. I watched the boys go through those changes with their puberty, and I felt blessed to now be counted with the girls as instead, I grew breasts, hips and a juicy butt. My memories of coming out was a bit painful and I had lost many of my friends, but I made some new ones too. If fact there had been a gay boy in my grade who everyone could tell was gay (he only later came out of the closet openly when he went to university), but all through junior and senior high school we never teased him or bullied him or assaulted him, and after I declared that I was joining the girls team, I found myself embraced by the same girls and offered to be their friends just as he had. Even though we were very different, he became one of my closest friends as we kinda found in each other a kindred spirit. I was surprised to find that I remembered that I had experimented sexually with both boys and girls by the time I was only fifteen years old. The memories were pleasant regardless of who I had been intimate with as I had practiced with phallic-shaped fruit and toys to be ready before I tried a real penis in my mouth and bum. Judging by the fact I now knew that I was married to a wonderful man, I guess I had decided I liked sausage more than tacos. The '80s were a less enlightened time I think, so I had to wait till I was in my twenties before they would let me correct my genitals. I had already met my future husband by then, and he loved me for me and not for what I was packing. Besides, I was able to keep him happy no problem and I had nothing but pleasant memories of enjoying everything did with him too. But after my surgery to turn my P into a V, it was one of my happiest memories that I could recall. Well, that and holding and breastfeeding my first adopted child (The right chemical cocktail having caused my breasts to lactate). We had been married for only a couple of years when we decided to have children. Of course, I was incapable of being a genetic parent, so we adopted our first two girls, each a couple years apart in age. We tried a surrogate for our third child, my husband provided his half of the genetic material, so he was the natural father. When we had another girl, we decided that three kids were enough of a blessing. Raising three girls while also still chasing the dream of time travel had been a challenge, but there was nothing quite like my past, present and future happiness laying on the line motivates a girl to succeed. Besides my husband was a fully involved father and absorbed at least half of the parental duties. We never talked about it, but he could tell there was something very personal about me succeeding at my job. And succeed I did as I just returned from the first successful time travel away mission. Tonight I looked forward to celebrating with my husband. I was looking forward to getting all dolled up and sexy with full lingerie, an evening gown, and some high heels. My husband would take me out and lead me around on the dance floor, one of two places where I always demanded he takes charge. Then later tonight, I would submit myself to him as he took charge in the other place, our bedroom. I could hardly wait to take pleasures as I pleased his cock with my mouth, my pussy, and my ass, and he would choke me just a bit while he pumped into me, maybe slapping my ass occasionally. I don't know exactly how tonight will go down, but my husband has learned to really control me while we fuck and make love and I knew the orgasms would roll over me again and again. It would feel so good that I would wish I could turn back time and do it all over again. fini CBA