The Barford Files Chapters VII and VIII
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The Barford Files - Chapters III And IV free porn video
III: Shopping. Cleaning. Cooking.
The designated time that Pam was supposed to arrive at Rubie's Mall for
the screen test was actually a couple of hours before the Mall was to
open for business, so it felt eerie to see so many closed and darkened
storefronts as she went in, showing the printed e-mail that Shelly Piper
had sent to her to the Security Guard outside.
The moment Piper saw her, she lit up, and bounded over. "Yay! You're
here! And right on time, too. That's gonna be a gah-REAT reflection on
the people you'll be testing in front of!"
"Well..." Pam looked understandably nervous. "...I've never actually,
um, been on television before. I'm probably gonna blow it. You may be
wasting your time with..."
"Oh, no you don't, girl!" Shelly interjected, keeping her perky grin
evident beneath her wide, sky-blue eyes as they continued to walk
towards the screen test area. Her voice was a bundle of overcharged
energy as she spoke. "We'll have none of those negative vibes! Think
POSITIVE! Always! That's the Merryweather way, after all, and the only
way everyone will have a Merry day! OH, OH...I personally suggested that
'Merry day' idea to the showrunners, by the way, and they were 500%
impressed! They want to use that! Can you believe it?? MY IDEA!! I'm
telling you, Pam...it's all gonna come together! Just remember to be as
natural as possible. Pretend that the cameras are one person, and that
you wanna teach them everything you know. The cameras that are on you
are your best friend. Ever-curious, ever-vigilant. Be yourself for the
screen test. You'll be surprised at how well you'll do! Don't doubt
yourself, sweetie!"
Shelly continued to bound and prance all over the place like a
hyperactive gazelle, and always with a paper-full clipboard in one arm
and a smartphone in her other hand. Pam eventually came upon a table
where a quartet of executives sat. Three were female, and one was male.
Beyond this table was a stage in the middle of a large space between the
shops in the mall, built to resemble a surprisingly authentic-looking
kitchen! There was a state-of-the-art burner platform, an oven, several
hanging pots and pans, various bunched-up utensils and cooking
implements...if it could be found in a kitchen, it was here, and all of
it brand new.
As she stared at the kitchen set, her arm was suddenly grabbed by
Shelly. "C'mon! C'mon! You need to get to the makeup table! Let's go!"
"But...I thought this was just a screen test!" Pam confusedly remarked
as she was practically dragged over to a side table with lighted
mirrors, various articles of makeup, and a frumpy-looking, curly-haired
woman wearing butterfly-style glasses.
"We obviously want you looking your best for it!" Shelly chirped as she
settled Pam into a chair. Without a word, the frumpy woman immediately
went to work on Pam's face as Shelly checked a black stopwatch that hung
around her neck.
Five minutes later, Pam was deemed ready and Shelly once again grabbed
her and pulled her over to the stage. "Step on up!" she chirped. "This
kitchen is yours!"
Pam smiled nervously, practically feeling the caked-on makeup as lights
flared down from above onto the stage. The area was completely
illuminated, and Pam could feel the heat. The intensity of the lights
was so strong she could not help but squint in her effort to look down
upon the four executives staring back up at her.
A young woman wearing plainclothes, a headset with an attached mike, and
a clipboard cradled under her arm stepped over to Pam. From the way she
sounded, it seemed like this was to be the show's director. "Okay,
Pam... as Shelly said, act natural. Think of the cameras as your best
and most trusted friend. Open up, and tell your friend everything about
what you're doing, because your friend is curious, and wants to learn.
Never go quiet, but don't talk too much, either. Everything you do, talk
about it. Describe it as you go. Share your thoughts..." she indicated
the cameras. "...with your best friend at all times. Oh...and try not to
look too nervous."
"PAAA-AAAM!" Shelly called her from behind the quartet of executives.
Her squinting eyes switched from the director to Shelly. "Hey! Hi. Just
so you know..." She indicated one dark-skinned female executive who was
busy writing notes down on a piece of paper. "...this is Camille Nolan
of Loris International's advertising wing, and..." Shelly stepped behind
the woman next to him, who looked like a pretty young Asian girl with
shoulder-length black hair. "...over here is Lynn Ji-Kim..." Lynn gave
Pam a cordial wave and a cute smile as Shelly moved to the only male of
the group, a graying old man who looked at her with an inquisitive
stare. "...and over here is Mr. Nigel Raleigh, who will gauge your
international audiences potential..."
But Nigel shook his head resolutely. "She's far too plain. She won't
work without a full makeover," he growled, his words tinged with a
distinct british accent."
Shelly sighed as the other executives glared at Nigel. "Obviously, we
have judges here who are, well, quick to judge." Her gaze turned to
Nigel. "Any changes like that come later, Mr. Raleigh. We just need you
to gauge her..."
"I know why I'm here, girl!" Nigel snapped back. "I am giving my knee-
jerk reaction! This is a professional opinion rooted in years of
experience measuring the worth of potential new celebrities that are to
go before the cameras and create memorable personalities!"
"Yes, yes, very well." Shelly moved to the last female executive,
another older and graying woman who offered a polite nod to Pam while
keeping her expression disturbingly neutral. "And this is Ida Hopkins of
Standards & Practices. So long as you don't ad-lib anything
unnecessarily raunchy, you shoud earn her vote easily."
Regarding all four executives, she gave the quartet a wave. "Hello. I'm
Pam Merrywether."
Camille nodded, smiling. "She already has a pleasant-sounding voice. She
may get my vote easily as well."
Lynn nodded as well. "I agree."
"Needs a little more energy in her voice." Nigel observed. "She should
sound as if she was looking forward to inviting us into her home. We
need a little more eagerness."
Pam nodded, smiling. "I'll do my best, sir."
"Are you an experienced cook, Mrs. Merrywether?" Ida asked.
Pam shrugged. "My first cooking days were when I used baking toys as a
kid. You know...the ones where you can actually create edible foods?
I've been watching cooking shows and reading cookbooks ever since. Never
really thought about promoting those skills like this, though."
Shelly shrugged, flashing yet another perky smile. "First time for
everything!" She chirped, still relentlessly...and perhaps even
mindlessly...upbeat.
The director finally spoke up. "OK, quiet please..." She then stepped
over to face Pam. "...what we'd like you to do is to use the kitchen set
to prepare a quiche for us. You should have everything you'll need right
there. Take a quick moment to confirm that."
"Yeah, let me...get...what I need...on the counter..." Pam went back and
forth between the working onstage refrigerator/freezer and the pots,
pans, and bowls that she would need. She had done quiche so often that
she bragged of being able to prepare it blindfolded.
Within five minutes, she had what she needed on the counter next to the
burners. "I'm ready."
But the director surprised her by soundlessly mouthing the words we're
rolling.
Her eyes went to the camera. "Aaaand...so are you! Okay...always
remember, before you do anything, is to butter up your pans. Last thing
you want is to have your tasty quiche sticking more to the pan than it
should be sticking to your tastebuds." She partially unwrapped a stick
of butter as she spoke, and then set a burner on low-flame mode. Pam
then hovered the round that she was to create her quiche in over the
burner while rubbing the butter end of the stick against the smooth
surface of the round. "Just give the butter a light press against the
surface while covering every inch of it, right up to the corner. Try not
to spend too much time getting everything you need for the quiche
together. If you would rather wait until everything is mixed together
before buttering your pans, that's fine too." She dropped the pan and
shrugged, smiling meekly. "My bad habit."
As she continued her work, explaining everything as she went, the
executives observing her watched with very approving expressions. Even
Nigel found himself nodding thoughtfully as Pam continued her very
naturally-delivered tutorial.
Pam felt less and less nervous, given the nature of her primary
direction. Act natural. Pretend the cameras are your best friends. These
two bits of advice were very helpful in guiding her through the quiche-
making-for-television process. She even inserted her natural wit
wherever necessary during her tutorial.
Once the quiche was ready for the oven, she slipped it in...and found
that a second, pre-prepared quiche was already in there. No doubt this
was a lingering 'through the magic of television' trick. She worked
through this unexpected surprise, too, and in a manner the
executives...and everyone else, for that matter...did not expect.
"Aaaand while we're waiting for that one to cook, we'll just pull out
this one..." Her hands, covered with cooking mitts, pulled out the
freshly-cooked quiche. "...and show you what it should look like when
your quiche is done. Plating tiiiime! Cut this baby up into cake
triangles and serve, serve, serve...and if anyone asks? No! The cake is
NOT a lie, and neither is this yummy quiche!"
The smiling director killed the camera feed, after which the director
joined the pleased executives in providing their new star with a round
of loud applause. Even the stagehands looked impressed as they joined in
the ovation.
Pam looked visibly shocked, surprised that her 'performance' was so
well-received.
"That was perfect," Lynn complimented. "110 percent natural. This is
exactly what this kind of show needs."
"Marketing is going to have a field day promoting you, dear." Camille
added, beaming a pleased smile of her own. "In a very short time, I
think you're going to re-define the catchphrase 'cooking with Pam'."
"You kept your language accessible all throughout, sweetie!" Ida
remarked. "Nothing at all salty about the words you used. If you can
keep that upbeat rhythm, we could take you above and beyond even Gordon
Ramsay's programs."
"Oh, heck. We could have Gordon, Rachael Ray, Martha Stewart...future
houseguests for sure!" Camille noted.
"Does...this meannnn...?" Pam wondered aloud.
"Oh, your future is set, honey," Camille assured. "If you want the job,
it's yours."
Nigel was the only one who looked skeptical in any way. "I still say she
needs..."
"YES! YES! We're gonna fix that! Don't worry! Shit!" Shelly explosively
interjected.
Camille gestured to Ida cautiously. "Language!" she hissed.
"OOOH! Ummm..." Shelly blushed deeply, going from a sudden rage machine
to an embarrassed little girl in her response. She restored her perky
grin. "...s-sorry!"
"I...don't suppose I could suggest a mode of music for this show?" Pam
figured she'd try to make such a daring request. She spoke a bit
nervously. "I mean, so many of these morning home lifestyle shows have
such sappy music. If it were possible, could we go for a more jazzy
melody for the show?"
Pam thought this would endanger her chances of keeping a job she had
just won, but Camille sounded surprisingly receptive in her response. "I
don't see a problem with that. In fact, I agree. If the ambient music
were jazzy in nature, it would make the show much more progressive in
its approach."
Shelly, standing behind Camille, was wide-eyed and impressed in her
apparent shock as she gave Pam a quiet 'thumbs-up'.
"Not to make it seem like I'm being purposely harsh on you, young
lady..." Nigel began. "...but we just need to be assured of wide appeal.
Having a pleasant face to go with that lovely voice should give this
program all the more measure it needs to go the distance, so to speak."
Pam shrugged, smiling. "Whatever you feel needs to be done, sir."
Shelly once again grabbed Pam's arm the moment she stepped offstage and
began pulling her away from the kitchen set as she spoke, once again in
whirlwind mode. "Right, so we need to have the stage cleared quickly at
the moment while we address Mr. Raleigh's concern about your appearance.
You saw the Butterfly Salon on the way in, right? Well, that's going to
be our next stop, and they're all ready for you to boot! You're getting
the extra-special treatment. If Nigel thought you didn't look like a
star now, just wait and see his expression when they're through with
you! Nigel might even be our go-between in getting Mr. Ramsay down
here...did you know he is nothing at all like his nasty personality
suggests on Hell's Kitchen? He's actually quite the gentleman off-
camera! I wonder if he's better at frying things. I mean, he is
Scottish..."
As Shelly kept chirping along, Pam couldn't help but be concerned for
what was about to happen to her. She was about to be taken to the one
place her daughter steadfastly refused to go into after being more or
less sold on the rest of the mall.
She never thought to ask her daughter why, however.
* * *
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