A Proper Goodbye
- 4 years ago
- 20
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Spring 2005 - Brownwood
A solitary, distinguished-looking man sat on the bench and gazed out over the large garden. His jet black hair was speckled with hints of silver and his weathered but handsome face showed signs of a life spent outdoors. To a stranger he appeared like a man taking in a beautiful spring afternoon, but those who knew Nathan Cordova would've noticed something was wrong.
Gone was the warm gentle smile that usually adorned his face. Dark brown eyes that once announced his intelligence and wit were now lifeless and cold. They were the eyes of a man condemned to a shattered life. It was a man with no hope who stared out over the rose bushes and spring flowers.
He felt the gentle April sun on his face but still shivered. It would take more than nature's warmth to give him any comfort. The sun's rays were only felt skin deep. They failed to touch the deep coldness claiming his soul.
Nathan shuddered and instinctively clutched the present in his hand. It was a bonsai tree, her favorite. It signified a milestone in their marriage, an accomplishment, and an ending. A wave of emotion swept over him as he stared at it.
I'm a cuckold, he thought to himself. I would've never imagined that possible.
He watched the couple as they strolled by him, arm in arm. She was still quite beautiful, even in her early fifties. The absolute look of love she had as she gazed up at her escort melted the years away from her face. Her long black hair was streaked with silver and her figure could still draw the eyes of most men. But it was her beautiful face which pierced through all his defenses. Her deep brown eyes and her huge smile had once inspired him to take on the world. Now it was that same face which tore at his heart.
He stared at the man who had taken his place. He was easily twenty years younger than his wife, Eva. He was tall and skinny and had an odd look about him.
"Oh Bobby," Eva gushed. "I can't wait for our date Saturday night. Have you planned anything special for us?"
"Uh huh," Bobby replied with a confused look on his face. Quickly the look turned into a smirk. "Yeah, something special."
He grinned evilly as he slid his hand down her back until it rested squarely on her rear end. With a little pinch, he made his intentions known.
Eva squealed.
"Bobby Jones, you watch your hands!" she giggled as she playfully slapped his arm. She turned and gave him a deep passionate kiss.
"That should hold you until our date," she said smiling broadly. Gently she placed her head on his chest and sighed as they embraced each other.
Watching his wife act like a lovesick teen was surreal for Nathan. It's difficult to explain what a man feels when he sees his wife in the arms of another. Some may get sexually excited at the thought of sharing their wife, while others feel the rage that betrayal brings. Still others may sense a deep sadness due to the death of their marriage.
Nathan could only empathize with the latter as he watched his wife of thirty-two years bask in the presence of her boyfriend. He felt the storm of so many emotions churning inside of him screaming to erupt. He could never have shared her. It wasn't in him since neither his heart nor his beliefs would've ever allowed that. Of course he wasn't exactly sharing her now. It had all the aspects of a bad dream, a nightmare he couldn't wake up from. He'd lost her and it appeared she wasn't coming back.
It was the slow death of his marriage which brought so deep a coldness to his soul. It had been over eight years since he'd learned of his impending pain. However it had only been the last year and a half that it had become a reality. His head and his heart were in a constant battle. He understood why they were in this hell, but it didn't lessen the torment he felt watching it.
He fought the dark despair by concentrating on happier times.
He smiled as he remembered the first time he'd met Eva Navarro. She'd been with her family as they spent their summer in the south of Spain. At twenty, he was supervising the construction crew working on her family's villa. She'd mesmerized him the first time she spoke. Even after the work was done he'd found reasons to spend time around the eighteen-year-old beauty.
Most had thought it was only a summer romance, but Eva's parents knew almost before the young couple did. They'd been able to see into their daughter's heart and knew she was completely taken with him. After meeting with him several times they were convinced he was as smitten as Eva was but they feared the couple was too still too young. When Eva and her family went back to the States, Nathan attempted to follow. He began the long process of attaining a visa.
The physical distance between them caused Eva's heart to burn even more passionately for him. Soon she'd convinced her father to intercede on his behalf which included offering him a job. With the Navarro family influence, his visa process became much shorter. Soon he'd found himself in America, working on a construction crew.
Two years later, they were married. It started a thirty-two year married love affair that until recently had been the envy of both family and friends. Nathan closed his eyes and wrapped himself in the warm memories of his bride.
His smile slowly turned sad as he began to relive the last several years. Eight years ago, Eva had been diagnosed as being in the early stages of Alzheimer's, his beautiful bride had only been forty-four at the time. For the next several years they'd struggled with the fear and doubt that comes with such a death sentence.
After countless tears and prayers with their family and the church, he and Eva sat down to make some difficult decisions. They'd sought counsel from many sources: their priest, Father Bernard, their three adult children, close friends and relatives, specialists and lawyers. Four years ago they made several changes in their lives, changes they hadn't planned to make for at least another decade. Nathan turned the family construction company over to their sons, Marcus and Antonio. He knew they would continue to make it thrive and they had. He'd left himself on the payroll so the business would help him and Eva maintain their insurance.
Effectively retired, they used the opportunity to spend as much time together as possible. They weren't rich but they were very well off. Nathan decided, with Eva finally relenting, to spend some of their nest egg on traveling together. She hadn't needed to worry. The couple travelled for only about a year, and then Eva began having bad days. It was one thing to become disorientated and confused while they were within the safe confines of their ranch, but when it began happening in truly foreign surroundings, the results were disastrous. Nathan cringed as he remembered trying to calm his terrified wife while they were in Rome.
They had stayed exclusively in Brownwood since then. Their ranch wasn't like the monstrosities of several Navarro ranches in the area but it wasn't tiny, either. They'd built their dream home on 200 acres a few miles northwest of Brownwood. It became their sanctuary.
He grimaced as he remembered the fateful day when they realized Eva couldn't remain on the ranch. It had started like any other morning, they had eaten breakfast together. As he put the dishes away, she went to get the mail. She loved walking down the long lane to their mailbox each morning.
It had been October and there was a chill in the wind, an omen of an early winter. He'd smiled as he'd watched her start to go out wearing only her nightgown.
"Querida?" he'd asked, grinning. "Are you forgetting something?"
She'd flashed him her megawatt smile that melted his resolve. She quickly put on her cowboy boots and headed for the door.
"Eva, it's cold out there," he'd warned.
She quickly ran back to their bedroom and returned moments later wearing a pair of sweatpants under her nightgown along with her boots. When she'd donned a heavy fall coat over her nightgown, the ensemble was complete, redneck chic. He smiled sadly to himself realizing his wife's excellent fashion sense had been one of the early casualties of her disease.
The lane was only a hundred yards down to the mailbox and the county road. The ranch house was easily visible from anywhere along the lane. He'd watched her from the kitchen window like he had a hundred times before. She had a surreal beauty about her as her long hair and nightgown whipped in the wind.
Unfortunately that morning, he'd accidentally spilled the orange juice. He'd only taken his eyes off of her for a few minutes as he cleaned up the mess, but when he looked up again she was gone!
Frantically he'd raced outside but it was as if she had vanished. He'd gone back inside to see if he had just missed her but the kitchen was eerily silent. He walked down the lane calling out her name but to no avail. He racked his brain trying to remember everything he'd seen before she'd disappeared, hoping it would give some clue to her whereabouts.
He'd remembered a big black pick-up truck had driven by but he hadn't seen it stop. Fighting his rising fears that she'd been abducted, he returned to their home and called his sons and daughter. Within minutes he'd begun driving along the county road in his truck looking for her.
The family had searched for her for hours before he'd called the county sheriff office. Sheriff Olsen had been a good friend of their family and was aware of Eva's condition. When Nathan had called, the sheriff had brought with him several deputies to join in the search. By late afternoon, Sheriff Olsen had contacted the Brownwood police and in less than an hour half a dozen Brownwood police officers had joined the manhunt.
One of the off duty officers stumbled across her a couple hours after dark in an old machine shed a few miles away from the ranch. She'd been found huddled inside, covered by some empty feed sacks. They'd taken her to Sacred Heart because she was suffering from exposure.
Nathan remembered the tearful reunion. When he saw her in the Emergency Room, his heart had broken. Her hair was wild and covered parts of her face and her eyes were still wide with fear. She'd recognized him and had begun crying as she ran to him.
"Querido, I'm sorry," she'd sobbed as she clung to him. "I don't know what happened. I got lost and then I ran."
"Hush querida," he'd replied gently as he stroked her hair. "I have you now. You're safe."
"I couldn't find you! I remember running and running. I ran until I couldn't any more. It was getting dark and I found an old shed. I went in and tried to stay warm but it was so cold!"
"Shhh," he cooed softly as he held his fifty-year-old wife as she sobbed like a child. "It's over now. You're going home."
It had taken the rest of the night to calm her down. As he held her he realized things were about to change.
Over the next few weeks they'd discussed what they should do. It was evident she couldn't safely stay on the ranch but it didn't make the decision easier. So many nights he'd held her as she cried herself to sleep. It was only after she was asleep he'd allow his own tears to fall.
How do you fight something like that? How do you protect your loved ones from an enemy with no face?
He knew it was a losing battle, they both did. They were fighting an insidious enemy which took no prisoners.
She'd had another bad episode the week before she was to check-in to Brookhaven. She'd become hysterical at the thought of leaving their home. He'd held her and they'd both wept as she begged him not to send her away.
He'd almost given in that night but Eva woke up the next morning screaming at him. She hadn't recognized him and was upset she'd woken in bed with a stranger.
His heart broke. It was time.
That was eighteen months ago; since then Eva's condition had deteriorated rapidly. The first several months were difficult. Nathan had visited two, sometimes three times a day. Their children visited almost daily. The most painful were those days Eva didn't understand why he had to leave when visiting hours were over. He fought back his tears, remembering her crying and pleading with him not to leave her there.
At least she's not being tormented anymore, he silently sighed. A small blessing due to the fact she doesn't remember us anymore. God, I know I should be grateful but ... it hurts.
Her laughter brought him out of his morose thoughts. It wasn't her laugh that'd surprised him, she was always so full of life, it was the lack of joy that laugh now brought him. Once it would've brightened even his darkest moods. Now ... he was only numb.
Ten months ago, Bobby came back into their lives and brought with him a pain Nathan had never considered. He'd spent each day trying to remind Eva of her past, to remember him. Each day had been a battle. On those days she remembered him, he'd have his precious wife for the remainder of the day. However on those days she didn't remember him, she'd find her way back into Bobby's arms. It was a slow painful battle, one he'd finally lost. She hadn't remembered him in the last four months.
Bobby's real name was Martin Dorfman and he'd recently transferred to the Brookhaven Mental Care Facility. Nathan had learned he'd been in an auto accident three years ago and received severe head trauma which had left him mentally disabled.
What was frustrating was that Martin wasn't even the second incarnation of Bobby Jones, just the latest. The original Bobby Jones had been Eva's high school sweetheart over thirty-five years ago. Now it appeared that any tall, skinny, white male could be Bobby in his wife's mind.
Just like that son-of-a-bitch Harold Frost!
Nathan sighed heavily.
Stop it! He chastised himself. He was as sick Eva is.
He struggled to put the sixtyish bean-pole of a man with dementia out of his mind.
Usually Eva's romances with her 'Bobby' were that of a star-struck high school girl, full of kisses, giggling, and heavy petting. Occasionally it'd gone farther than that, like it had with Harold.
Nathan desperately shut his eyes trying to force his mind from going down that path. He was startled out of his revelry by the gentle sound of a woman clearing her throat.
"Is this seat taken?"
A hint of a smile formed as he recognized the voice. Opening his eyes he stared up at an attractive woman in her late forties. He knew her age because she'd told him, not that he would ever have guessed it. She looked at least a dozen years younger than her actual age with her long blonde hair and willow-like frame.
"Mrs. Morgan," he said weakly smiling.
"Allie," she retorted.
"Allison," he said with a broad smile.
"Nathan, we've gone through this before," she said with a huge grin. "It's Allie."
Her eyes danced with a playful look that did nothing to hide her affection for him. He couldn't help but return her smile. She had such a joy about her it was contagious.
"Allie," he said softly.
He knew in his heart Allie Morgan was a Godsend. She'd become his Angel of Mercy, a light in the darkness that had surrounded his life. She'd been there at his darkest hour and had seen him at his weakest.
Nathan painfully replayed that terrible day.
He was ashamed that his visits had diminished drastically after the time he'd actually found Eva with Harold. Before then he'd always come to Brookhaven, checked in at the nurses' station and then gone back to her room. He'd knock on her door, open it, and ask her to visit with him. That day when he opened her door his fragile world shattered.
His beautiful wife laid there, eyes closed with a look of absolute rapture in her face as she softly moaned. Her smooth breasts were being roughly squeezed by the tall, thin man positioned between her muscular legs. His pale white skin was in stark contrast to her tanned, caramel colored body. Nathan watched in horror as an old man took his wife as she grunted out her pleasure.
"Oh Bobby, oh yes Bobby. Be gentle baby, you're my first and only. I love you and only you," Eva panted. She opened her eyes and saw him. With a shriek she pushed Bobby off of her and tried to cover herself. A stunned and confused Harold Frost fell off the bed.
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- Everlong -Disclaimer: This is a work of fiction. Don't rape people in real life,don't kidnap them and don't stick needles into them against theirwill.She's lying on a bed, naked, arms and legs spread. Coils of rope bindher hands and wrists to the posts of the bed. It is warm, almost hotin this windowless cellar, lit by countless candles of red and whiteon the floor, on shelves on the wall. Her body is stretched, her firmbreasts riding high, her skin golden in the...
When Times Are Toughby: counterparts199Mature audiences only - I'm a pacifist, and this is fantasy:"Times have been tougher. Since the nuclear wars society has rebounded and then stabilized. International treaty had hopefully made nuclear war a thing of the past. A rule of order has been established, creating strong senses of border, and allowing the full weight of a strong United Nations to come to bear on any nation crossing another's line. The only major exceptions are excessive...
CALONGE CUTIES AWESOME ATHLETIC SENSUAL SASKIA & MIGHTY MIND MARINACOME & SEE HOW HOT HORNY SEXY SASSY SASHA STEALS A SHOW FIRST FIVE M======================================================================CASUALLY CUNNING CUTIE SASKIA SMOKES WHEN WALKING TO THE SHORE & MECASUALLY SHE STARTS TO TRY HER HAND-STANDS RIGHT IN FRONT OF S.M. & MECLEARLY SHE SOLICITS SOME SUPPORT FROM ACROBATIC EXPERT PROF POET-PCLEARLY SHE SHOWS SURE SWIFT PROGRESS - POSES PROUD PUSSY...
CALONGE CUTIES AWESOME ATHLETIC SENSUAL SASKIA & MIGHTY MIND MARINACOME & SEE HOW HOT HORNY SEXY SASSY SASHA STEALS SECOND SHOW SHOT======================================================================CALONGE CUTIES COOL-OFF - COME-BACK BRONZING - SASKIA'S SMELLY SMOKE: CALONGE CUNNING CUTIE CUNNIE SEDUCTIVE SMART SHYLY SUBMISSIVE SASKIA CALONGE CUNNING CUTIE CUNNIE MEMORABLE 'MIGHTY MIND' MAIN MAID MARINACALONGE COLOURING BEACH BRONZING - BEFORE BRUTAL BAD BED-SEX BEGINSCALONGE...
BDSM : BONDAGE DOMINANCE SADISM MASOCHISM OR IN OTHER WORDS IN CONCRETOBALD BELLY BARE BOLD BEACH BEAUTIES - FIVE FINE FEMININE FEMALE FANTASTICALLYDARING DEAR DIRTY DABBLING DARLING DAUGHTERS PRAISE PROFESSOR POET-PETERSUNNY - SHYLY SEDUCTIVE - SECRETLY SUBMISSIVE - SUMMER-SCHOOL SEX STUDENTSMORMON MONASTERY MEMENTO MEFISTO MONDAY MORNING EXOTIC EROTIC EXERCISE BEGINNING BY BRUNETTES BEFORE BLONDES BY A LOOK AT MY LOVELY LONELY LASSESDO YOU LIKE TO FOLLOW THESE TASTY TINY TIT TIGHT TWAT TEASE...
JOLLY JUICY JOSÉE AND MAIN MAIDEN MARINA MAKE ME MADJOLLY JUICY JOSÉE IS AN OPEN BOOK - MAIN MAIDEN MARINA?JOLLY JUICY JOSÉE IS INTIMATELY INTRODUCED - SEE BELOWJOLLY JUICY JOSÉE DOESN'T KEENLY KEEP SEXUAL SECRETSJOLLY JUICY JOSÉE DOESN'T COME EASY IN FACT NOT AT ALL!=====================================================JOLLY JUICY JOSÉE IS MY MAIN CALONGE CUTIE CHALLENGEJOLLY JUICY JOSÉE IS MY MAIN MIGHTY MIND SEXY STUDENT JOLLY JUICY JOSÉE IS MY MAIN CALONGE CUTIE CHALLENGE JOLLY JUICY JOSÉE...
The First Mona Youngblood Story Mona Youngblood had a good view of her apartment from her hidden vantage point. Which is, of course, the point of hiding for advantage. Or, in this particular case, hiding for safety, since there was an intruder standing not six meters away from her. Having worked for several years on the fringes of society and the law, Mona had the foresight and the resources to extensively remodel this apartment. There was a very good wall safe behind an oil original in...
"When's the party?" my Mom asked. "The party's this Saturday," my 16-year old big sister Autumn answered. The party was next door at Savannah's house. She was 16 too. "Alright, you can go. You know that Dad and I will be at his business convention and we won't be home until very late." The convention center was a couple of hours away. "I know," said Autumn. "I was going to be bored at home all day so this gives me something to do." "And me too," I chimed in. Autumn frowned...
The second difference I recognized was sex. That realisation came while I was standing knee-deep in one of my favorite stretches of the ringriver. Just downstream of the canyonlands — what Mother called “antispinward”, opposite to the rotation of the ship — the river was dotted with a cluster of small islands planted with cherry trees. If you were daring enough, the island chain could be reached from the riverbank by leaping the foaming water via a series of broad flat rocks. Every 120 days...
After a decade of daily travel Zuri and I were intimate with every bank and island of the river. Our bare feet had trod its thirty-kilometer circumference multiple times, leaving both of us aching to adventure farther. Finally yielding to our demands, Mother led us along an antispinward stream feeding the ringriver, heading towards the bow. The air was cool, carried on a low headwind that pushed constantly against my face, pebbling my skin with gooseflesh. Crisp, dry brown foliage snapped...
Five kilometers above the night-darkened lake, the last set of fireworks launched themselves from the spindle of darkened moonline. As we watched, the tiny dots of light descended through the atmosphere, splitting into thousands, then millions of autonomous fragments, forming a spinning accretion disk of brilliant color that stretched across our home from one side to the other. The vast display pulsed, colors rippling out through each fragment, reflected in the water below, illuminating the...
My lessons began to diverge from Zuri’s a year after our first dive in a takamakura. While my sister continued to learn whatever interested her, my sessions increasingly became focussed on urban planning, stellar cartography, environmental stewardship and resource allocation. The more I resisted the flow of information, the more overt the lessons became, like fighting a remorseless current. Eventually, it was easier to give in. In reward the infinite space within the takamakura began to...
“You are homo liberas. You will never grow sick, never wither or fade.” Standing on the cliff face, skin gleaming in the mist of the waterfall that thundered over the lip of dark brown rock at our feet, the words of our mother had the cadence of a rite. It was the morning of our fourteenth birthday. We had arrived at the falls after walking most of the night, reaching the top just as the lightline began to glow into dawn. The higher elevation of the upper summerland plains dropped...
Soft, blue light played over Zuri’s bare stomach from the factotum’s cupped digits as she lay back on the grass. It was impossible to believe that a baby could exist in her flat, firm belly, but there it was, projected and magnified in a hologram above her navel: two tiny yolk sacs with their fetal poles. Twins. I held Zuri’s hand, breathless in wonder, feeling her hand squeeze mine tightly. “That’s us,” she whispered. “We’ve always been a fecund species,” our mother said, then blinked. “I...
Lying on her side under the shade of a river birch, the dark round hill of Zuri’s belly moved slightly with each slow, deep breath as she slept. Passing high above us, a long white wisp of visibly curved cirrus cloud momentarily dimmed the sunline, stilling the whirring sounds of insects. Spinward, the closest building of the polis remained a quarter of the way up the cylinder. Compared to the nomadic adventures of our childhoods, we’d been making very slow progress along the ringriver...
19 YAL Our wanderings became circumscribed by our daughters. Ananya and Hotene, names we had chosen from the Old Sol cultures associated with their phenotypes, largely slept when we did. Thankfully, they usually went down at around the same time, after Hotene’s nightly fight; the staggered circadian rhythms that kept our sleepless human ancestors on guard at the mouths of their caves were synchronized in homo liberas twins, repurposed to Longshot’s watches. Our family expanded to three...
20 YAL At first our mother’s departure felt much like the trips she had taken in the past when Zuri and I were children. But as the days of her absence continued, we realised that she wasn’t coming back. “Daddy?” Ananya’s high voice piped above my head as she swayed side to side on my shoulders. “Yes, sweetheart?” “How many stars are there?” My eldest daughter – Ananya had emerged into the world two minutes before her sister – had recently become obsessed with counting and numbers....
Frowning at the carving in my hands, I smoothed a curve of dark brown wood with the pad of my thumb. I’d been playing with Ship’s printer algorithms for weeks, trying to convince the AI to produce wood with an interesting structure that avoided becoming interlocked. Working on the meter-long post with a chip knife had convinced me that the latest sample might actually be a usable result. I had started carving a few years ago. Carrying a sleeping Ananya in my arms along a rocky beach at the...
The bats were just beginning to come out by the time I made it to the polis. Avians had apparently never been successfully adapted to the habitat, for reasons we still didn’t understand; the only birds we ever saw were flightless rails, parrots, and some ground-hugging species. But bats had thrived, especially in the canyon and rainforest biomes, from where they emerged each evening to hunt for insects. We had taught the children to spot them at dusk by listening for the faint rustle of...
After dinner was cleared away and recycled, we rose one level farther. Mother had told the truth: the dome at the top of the tower was completely clear, allowing me to look directly overhead at last. A ramp from the open capsule doors took us up to a square sleeping platform in the center, from where I could see the city spread out beneath us and the darkened habitat beyond. Immediately, I felt much more comfortable. Standing above the center of the ringriver allowed me to observe it as I...
“So Mom’s pregnant,” Zuri said. I looked at my sister in surprise as I climbed down from the crouching factotum. “You knew?” She raised an eyebrow. “Of course. She never does anything without a plan.” Returning to the intimacy of family allowed me to forget my new responsibilities for a long time. Fear of command was replaced with the immediate task of raising Hotene and Ananya, thoughts of the immensity of our voyage and my responsibility for it subsumed by the simple act of waking up...
30 YAL Sitting on the stern shore of Lake Numi I felt the alert from Ship enter my mind like a rock shearing from the face of an incomprehensibly tall cliff, falling through infinite divisions of femtoseconds before plunging into the shallow waters of my brain. Glancing at Mother, I saw her eyes film over in response to the same message. You have this, she subvocalized, her voice low and calm in my ear. Longshot was beginning to turn. In the depths of interstellar space the vessel’s...
My children’s reaction to Mother’s departure reflected their personalities perfectly. Ananya was saddened by the news, but held up stoically, leaving our conversation determined to make her grandmother’s last day with the family as pleasant as possible. Kirra, too young to fully understand what was happening, appeared to be mostly confused, but quickly settled into nonchalance. I reserved a chance for storminess later when realisation set in. In contrast, my second daughter’s response was...