Janie's Big Break (part One) free porn video

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“I want a blond haired blue eyed fraulein to suck on my manly wiener schnitzel before it is the time for some blitzkrieg-ing over there in Poland.” said Dieter to his friend Klaus.

“You got that right, mein mensch!” replied Klaus, "Now that it is world war two and soon Germany will sign the Tripartite pact forming a military alliance with Italy and Japan, I too would like a blond haired blue eyed fraulein to service me in such a way as to give me manly pleasure. Soon we will be one of the Axis Powers and we will have some serious seig heiling to do! It was not always this way!"

Soon in Pensacola Florida it was 2009, some fat chicks were angry because they had not achieved their manifest destiny. They were fat loud oily bitches, and they all wanted food.

“I want a burrito, God damn it” yelled fat oily Julie.

Each of the fat chicks drove their SUVs to an Mexican eatery and got bean burritos. They hadn’t even finished the bean burritos before they were all farting fat ass farts and discharging huge amounts of fatty methane, a greenhouse gas, into the air. Soon the average temperature of the earth’s near surface air and oceans increased, maybe because of the increase in anthropogenic greenhouse gas concentrations including the aforementioned fatty methane.

The fat loud oily chicks didn’t even care about the global warming that their fat farty methane had caused. Their only concern had to do with the discomfort the global warming had caused them. It was not always this way.



Meanwhile at an apartment in Cleveland, a California blond named Donna was slurping a guy named Richard’s seed squirter. Richard’s knob sack smelled cheesy and tasted like dank bile, salt and yeast. Donna slurped Richard’s dong as he pulled her ass cheeks so far apart that her sheriff’s badge became gaping fudge tunnel. When Richard did this, he was hit by a huge warm blast of dank fart. It smelled like something had crawled up Donna’s ass and died.

The shock of the fragrance snapped Richard head around. Forgetting Donna and her flatulence, Richard thanked Jesus for his Salvation Army BB flat contrabass trombone. Richard had always marveled at the design of the spit valve on the Salvation Army BB flat contrabass trombone. The Salvation Army BB flat contrabass trombone has a double slide and spit collects in both tubes. The Salvation Army BB flat contrabass trombone has two spit valves, one for each tube. The two spit valves are operated by depressing a single lever! Richard had a Conn BB flat contrabass trombone as well, but that model only has one spit valve. It didn’t have the spit yield potential of his Salvation Army BB flat contrabass trombone.

As Richard recovered his senses, he could feel the sudden increase in the earth’s atmospheric temperature due to the greenhouse effect of Donna’s cheek flapping gale force pungent methane rich California blond fart. Richard suddenly felt a sudden decrease in blood pressure that could have resulted in fainting. This was followed by abdominal discomfort, agitation, anxiety, constipation, decreased sex drive, diarrhea, loose stools, bloating, dry mouth, fatigue, and gas.

Richard’s erection shriveled. He wiped a bit of perspiration from his furrowed brow.


“Oh my gosh golly!” said Donna with a giggle “I just cut the cheese with my flatulent ass queef. My colonic calliope dropped a barking spider! I’m so embarrassed by the gaseous intestinal by product that just blasted out of my keister. I really emptied the tank with that one.”

Donna paused and scratched her nose.

“I suppose I killed the romance.” Continued Donna “Would you like to stick your rock hard chubby schlongski into my hot moist quivering quim?”

“My chubby schlongski is not rock hard anymore.” Replied Richard “Your ass blasted methane registered a 7.8 on the Rectum scale. Knocked the stiff right out of my willy. Can you fondle and suck it for a bit?”

“I love playing with your dick. It’s so big and if I squeeze it, it gets bigger.” responded Donna as she reached for Richard‘s shwantzer. “It’s a cute dick too. Some dicks are really ugly funny looking. Some guy’s dicks smell like ammonia or goat cheese or both. Your cock smells like a candy cane muffin. It’s so yummerz!”

Donna put the head of Richard‘s penis into her mouth, sucked hard and moaned. Her tongue pushed and curled around the bottom of his prick sometimes poking out of her mouth with a wet slurp. Richard stiffened considerably. He massaged her shoulder as she sucked more of his cock into her mouth and moaned. She had both of her hands on his balls and was tickling them gently. Richard knew from experience that Donna could suck as long as he could massage. Longer, actually.

Donna slurped and sucked on Richard’s stiff shlonger. Donna grabbed Richard’s shlong shaft near his balls and squeezed as she eased some of his prick out of her mouth until only the top part of his head remained in her mouth. Donna gave him a super helmet scrub, licking furiously at his piss slit. Donna looked up at Richard as she positioned herself carefully and slowly swallowed his eight inches of man sausage until her lips were resting on his pubs. She looked like she had a moustache.

Richard pumped her throat as he continued rubbing the area of Donna’s right shoulder blade. After about a minute, Donna slowly let his sword out of her mouth a bit and sucked hard. Her tongue worked the bottom of Richard’s rod as she continued to let more of Richard’s knob out of her mouth until only the top part of his head remained in her mouth. Donna gave him a super helmet scrub again, licking furiously at his piss slit.
Then Richard began to gently pump her throat again, but Donna gagged and quickly pulled away.

“Oh my gosh golly!” exclaimed Donna “That was close. I almost had to vomit, or ralph!” She sucked the head of Richard’s wang back into her mouth and slurped it hard and loud. She knew Richard loved to hear her slurp and moan while she sucked and she was happy to comply. Her cooch was already very wet, and it was in need of attention. That was good. Donna liked to wait until she couldn’t take it anymore. She had her thighs wrapped around Richard’s left shin. She was grinding her crotch against it while slurped hard on his wiener until he shot a sploogy load of man sauce down her thirsty gullet.

After he shot the aforementioned sploogy load of man sauce down Donna’s thirsty gullet , Richard realized he didn’t care about Donna. He didn’t care about her vaginal shenanigans. His sack was somewhat lighter by her efforts, and he appreciated that, but he felt empty. He wanted to leave.

Richard got up and put on his clothes. He reached into the pocket of his 100 percent cotton denim preshrunk five pocket button fly comfortably relaxed seat straight leg blue jeans and took out a socket wrench. He handed it to Donna.

“Hold on to this until I get back.” said Richard. He felt old and insignificant. It was not always this way.


“Ok” replied Donna, taking the socket wrench.

Richard left the apartment and took out his cell phone and made a call.

“So how’s Boise treating you?” asked Richard to the party at the other end of his call…


Meanwhile in a second floor apartment in Boise some hot Lesbos were double headed donging it. Downstairs was a corner brew pub where some guys at the bar were talking about the recriminations faced by one who frets about his feminine sexual traits. A mousey girl at a corner table had a psoriasis tennis elbow and a two all beef patty posterior, but it was a new year and she was working on both afflictions. She had a fast acting deep moisturizing intensive strength medicated ointment for the psoriasis tennis elbow and a new health club membership fro the two all beef patty posterior. Her name was Leslie.

“Where for art thou Romeo?” she muttered to her friend who was sitting next to her. She sipped her slow gin fizz.

“I’ve just got to get out of Boise.” said her friend. Her name was Janie. She continued speaking. “I‘ve yet to achieve my manifest destiny. Boise is so boring and I have huge nipples and I just can’t find a brassiere in Boise that I like that covers my nipples well.”

Janie was 19, thin, sandy brown hair, with big green eyes covered by a pair of librarian glasses. She had a shapely thin figure; average sized breasts, long legs, and a shapely posterior.

“I’m considering moving to Los Angeles.” continued Jamie. “If I can’t find a proper brassiere in L.A., I doubt one exists. Besides, I know a guy named Richard who knows a guy who can get me a part in a movie. I’ve always wanted to be in the movies!”

“What kind of movie is it?” inquired Leslie.

“I love to sing, so I would love to be in a musical. I asked Richard if there would be any singing.” replied Janie, “He said it wasn’t in the script, but he thought I might be able to sing a couple of songs if I really wanted to. He said it was an interesting idea.”

“Oh, that would be wonderful for you!” gushed Leslie

Suddenly, Janie’s cell phone rang and Janie answered it.

“So how’s Boise treating you?” asked the party at the other end of the call

“Oh Richard, Boise sucks, you know that.” replied Janie.

“Well, I got your ticket out,” began Richard, “I talked to my buddy in L.A. and he said you could sing in the movie, but the songs have to be in the public domain. Songs like “By the Light of the Silvery Moon”, “Amazing Grace”, “Down in the Valley (Birmingham Jail)”, “Everything is Peaches Down in Georgia”, “You're a Grand Old Flag”, “A Mighty Fortress Is Our God”, or “Onward Christian Soldiers”. There are many more. You can google it if you have the google installed on your computer.”

“Great, I get to sing! I had a computer technician install the google last week. I‘ll check for songs. ” gushed Janie. “What is the film called?”

“Its called “Gokkun Party 6.”” Replied Richard.

“Gokkun Party 6?” asked an inquisitive Janie, “It’s the 6th sequel?”

“Yes,” replied Richard, “The others have sold very well.”

“I’ve never heard of any Gokkun Party movies.” interjected Janie.

“Straight to DVD, my darling! You can google it.” Offered Richard.

“Well, at least it’s a party movie and I can sing!” chirped Janie optimistically.

“Cool, meet me out there next week.” replied Richard. “I’ll wire you some money for a ticket and I’ll pick you up at the airport. I’m in the movie too!”

“Oh groovy! We’ll have such a blast” gushed Janie

“I know I will!” Laughed Richard…

-->

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The log cabin stood alone on the shore of a small lake. A dirt road, wide enough for a single vehicle, wound its way through the woods connecting the cabin to a highway almost three miles away. From the porch of the cabin, the surface of the calm lake reflected the trees surrounding it, making the lake look even smaller. In the morning and evening, the fish would break the surface eating insects that skimmed across the lake. Occasionally, a deer would come out to the lake’s edge to drink of...

4 years ago
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Ed BiggersChapter 9

Officer Mike Tougas sat in the restaurant of the hotel sipping a cup of coffee waiting for Ed to arrive from his suite upstairs. After the discussion on the phone, he had investigated the family of Beth Hayes. When he discovered the number of times that the family had been attacked in the past, many of his suspicions about them had been dispelled although he didn’t know the reasons behind the attacks. It was only after digging a little deeper that he learned that this family was the John...

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Bigfoot and the Wood Nymph 2

I am the Wood Nymph. Gavin, the love of my life, the man I lovingly call "Bigfoot," has told you his side of the story. Now let me tell you mine. I'm twenty years old. For the first ten years of my life, I was raised in a very liberal family. We were nudists, and spent every summer at one resort or another, in the company of other nudists. We also went bare around the house, so nudity was commonplace and entirely normal for me. In fact, I was out of clothes more than in them, especially...

2 years ago
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Bigfoot and the Wood Nymph

I know these hills like the back of my hand. I grew up not too far away, and every summer my Dad and I would go up there, into the national forest, by ourselves. I was eleven when we first went up there. He had given me my first hunting bow the Christmas before, and taken me hunting in those woods every summer since then. We'd spend weeks together hunting, without ever seeing another soul. We'd lay out trails and blaze them, far from the tracks that most of the other hunters and hikers used....

3 years ago
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Bigfoot Bride

Frank wasn't lost, because he knew where he was, and how to get back- but he didn't want to even think about returning yet. He was out here by choice, three weeks walk into the wilderness of the Canadian coast range- The last sign of another person he had seen was a trappers line, and a trail leading to an unseen cabin, sixteen days before. He sighed contentedly, and adjusted the straps of his backpack. The frozen ground made his journey possible, because the numerous creeks, swamps, muskeg...

2 years ago
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Paris Partie 1 sur 3

Ce jour-l?, Maxime Lamothe eu 17 ans pour la premi?re fois de sa vie. Bien s?r, il avait eu 16 ans, aussi, et 15 ans avant ?a. Mais ces ann?es-l? ?taient encore porteuses d'espoir. Il avait attendu, attendu, mais il s'?tait jur? que si ??a? ne changeait pas, il irait voir quelqu'un. Au cas o?. C'?tait maintenant. - Ecoutez, jeune homme...je ne vois rien d'anormal. Votre taille ne devrait...plus tellement changer. Vos parents ?taient d?j? petits eux aussi, apr?s tout. Mais c'est vrai, g?n?ralement...enfin....-...

4 years ago
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Le Retour partie 3 sur 3

Maxime resta tr?s longtemps dans un demi-coma. Ou, tout du moins, il le pensait. Des images allaient et venaient. Des personnages apparaissaient devant lui. Il ne pouvait pas voir leur visage, mais il les entendait parler. Parfois en fran?ais, parfois en anglais. Il se sentit avoir froid. Puis chaud. Puis froid ? nouveau. Et faim. Et chaud. Plusieurs fois il voulut ouvrir ses yeux, mais il n'y parvenait pas. Lorsqu'il ouvrit enfin ses yeux, il ?tait dans une chambre d'h?pital. Toute blanche, toute...

4 years ago
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Persephone

Sometimes I loved being a professor. Most of the time, really. My class is such that usually students don't take it if they aren't serious about it. Classical Mythology is not on the general education list so there are no general education credits for taking it. Teaching a specialized subject typically meant mature and dedicated students.This semester, however, my Thursday evening class had a handful of miscreants in it, one miscreant more troubling than the others. It seemed Blake...

Lesbian
3 years ago
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Ed BiggersChapter 6

Following Shadow, Ed walked into the IRS office and stopped at the receptionist. She looked at Ed and then glanced down at the cat. Smiling at Ed, she asked, “Who are you here to see?” “The person in charge,” replied Ed in a very casual manner. Very calmly, she picked up the phone and called security. Looking at Ed with a smile, she said, “Let me let him know you are here.” The sour tone of her voice let Ed know that she was lying to him. He reached in his back pocket as the woman said,...

2 years ago
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Ed BiggersChapter 7

Ed woke up on the floor of the playroom with Beth, Kelly, and Ling. Beth was spooned against him while Kelly and Ling were sleeping together. The hand moving on his cock suggested that Beth was not asleep. He moaned as his cock erected under her gentle administrations. As a result his moans, she knew that she was having a real effect on Ed. Beth increased the pressure of her grip on his cock. He shifted giving her easier access to it. The noise woke Kelly. Pouting, she came over and said,...

4 years ago
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Ed BiggersChapter 13

The house was still under construction, but enough of it had been completed to see how it was laid out. Ed walked from where the living room would be to the kitchen and dining room. Trying to construct a mental image as he examined the layout, he decided that he liked it a lot. It would be a very nice house once it was finished. He turned to Mrs. Hayes who was still in the living room and said, “I like it.” With a little smile in his direction, Mrs. Hayes said, “Of all the plans the...

2 years ago
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Ed BiggersChapter 23

Ling, Kelly, Leroy, Betsy, Linda, Dan, Claire, and the entire staff were waiting for William Redman Carter to return home. Much to everyone’s surprise, he walked into the house and headed directly to Linda without pausing long enough for anyone to hug him. He stopped in front of his mother and, after a pregnant pause, said, “It’s time to get you to the hospital.” “What?” asked Linda as a sudden spasm passed through her abdomen. Her eyes grew large when she realized what he meant. “I told...

2 years ago
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Aria di cambiamenti Parte 3 Rachel

Note from the author: The story is in Italian as I realized it is too hard for me to keep writing in English, but I will probably translate it later on. ---------------------------- Capitolo 3: Rachel Matt sedeva al tavolo della cucina di Steve. Una massa indistinta di capelli viola le ondeggiava davanti al viso ogni volta che si muoveva. Indossava ancora il pigiama prestatole da Chelsea. "Non riesco proprio a credere di aver avuto bisogno di un...

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Road to Tombstone

It was hot. Dust-eating, butt numbing hot as I rode the trail from California into the Arizona territory. Tombstone was planning a big Independence Day shindig that year since eighteen hundred and eighty two was a territorial anniversary. Even though I was still more than a hundred and fifty miles away I'd met up with slower moving groups heading in that direction. The trail was crowded with buckboards carrying weary families, with children whining about the heat. Big, clanking wagons loaded...

1 year ago
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Hagrid takes advantage of Hermione

Hermione: Just think of Emma Watson or google her or something Hagrid: Big guy, like 9 feet tall, kinda fat, long bristly beard and hair. Harry: Skinny, untidy black hair, glasses, scar on his forehead Ron: tall, red hair, freckles “Where are you going?” Ron asked. Hermione, one foot out the portrait hole looked back at Ron and Harry, who were playing a game of Wizard’s Chess in front of the fire in the Gryffindor common room. “I’m just going down to see Hagrid. I need...

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Study friends Ginny and Hermione

Hermione walked towards the libary to meet up with Ginny - who had asked Hermione if she could help her with studying for the OWLS. The mere thought of studying sent Hermione into a frenzy of delight! What would she teach the young Ginny? Transfiguration? Defense Against The Dark Arts? Oh! Hermione did not care which subject, for she loved them all. She walked into the libary and proceeded to look for Ginny - she overheard several people talking, "man, I never knew she could be that hot -...

3 years ago
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Melody at Monet

We took an Uber down to the museum, and we were having a great time socializing on the way. The Monet exhibit had been sold out for weeks and as we preceded toward the exhibit hall where the Monet exhibit was housed, we were all very excited as we waited in the museum lobby for our scheduled time. We were soon allowed to go in and as soon as we started to walk around the Monet exhibit, it was apparent just how packed it was. The museum kept the lighting low, probably so it wouldn’t damage...

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297 PT1 The last atonement

297 PT1 The last atonement! This in pt1and 2 is a 100% true story as given to me by the lady concerned, some features of it some will find distasteful and normally I would not deal with in my normal course of writing, but because its true I have included the whole sorry story in her own very precise wordsThe last atonement! I was going through a bad patch emotionally, things were very difficult at home and I was in a rather dark place, I knew I needed some release from the mental struggle of my...

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Harry Potter and the Spellbook of Desires Chapter 34 Harry Gets Hermione

Chapter Thirty-Four – Harry Gets Hermione Disclaimer: This story does not reflect the attitudes or characters in the Harry Potter series, nor does it have any affiliation with its author. Story Codes: mf, mf, exhib, grope, magic, mc, reluc, spank, unif Since acquiring the fabled Spellbook of Desires from the strange and frankly disturbing salesman at the Quidditch World Cup, Harry had not once used it to seduce Hermione Granger into having some hot teenage sex with him. Ron and half...

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Being Bred By Bigfoot

Cathy could feel her stress level start to decrease as she drove out of town in her dad’s F150 pickup heading into the mountains.  Her freshman year of college had sucked in about every way possible with the exception of she had passed all of her classes, and gotten the number of credit hours she needed for both semesters.She was heading for a girl's weekend with Sherry and Janice.  They would set up camp tonight, Thursday night, and then they would do some serious hiking in the mountains just...

Monster Sex
3 years ago
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Harry and Hermione

Harry Potter, "The Boy Who Lived", was beyond mad. He was seethingly angry. He had just been out on a date with Cho Chang, the girl he had had a crush on since his 3rd year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft & Wizardry. Thing had looked up over the past few months. Cho actually seemed to be liking him! It had taken him ages to screw up the courage to ask her our, but he couldn't have wished for a better response. She had accepted immediately. However, once out on the date, Harry found...

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