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JULIAN AND HARPER and I sat on our deck in the afternoon sun a couple of weeks after Julian had finished his first year of college and Harper had graduated.
“Terrified. I mean, Dad, it’s not the first time I dressed up, you know that.”
I nodded.
“Dressing up around the house or going out with lingerie underneath, that’s OK. No one notices.”
He paused and drank. White wine on our deck. Late afternoon sun warm enough but not too hot. I reached for my Leica.
“Look to me, Julian, will you?”
The sun outlined his features, a masculine light, portrait photographers call it. Julian’s strong cheekbones and his nose highlighted. No light meter. I’d take my chances.
“Miriam and Eloise are cool with this, Dad. I mean, them and Harper have lived together for so long they practically read each other’s minds.”
“They went out with you and Harper, right?”
Julian nodded. I turned to Harper to ask her how Julian looked. She laughed out loud.
“You should have seen him, Dad. He looked fantastic. Even I had to look a second time to be sure it was him.”
“It was just us four girls out for a drink and maybe a little dancing. There’s a place not too far from their house where everyone goes.”
Julian stopped and took another swallow. I refilled his glass and topped up my own.
“You sure you want to hear this, Dad?”
My turn to laugh. “You bet, Julian. Your mom and Mama Sarah want to hear it, too. Too bad they’re out.”
“OK. Here goes.
“The place wasn’t too busy and we we found a table right off. Far enough away from the music but close enough to the dance floor.”
Julian touched my forearm.
“It’s an ‘all-gender’ place, Dad, you know?”
I nodded.
“So it was no big deal if I danced with Harper first.”
Another swallow. Once more I filled Julian’s glass.
“I wasn’t trying to look like anything other than myself, I mean, this part of myself.”
“And he did, Dad,” Harper put in. “He looked great.”
Harper leaned over to kiss Julian.
“Anyway,” Julian continued, “I got asked to dance by a fairly cute guy right off.”
Julian shook his head in disgust or disappointment.
“We danced kind of apart and kind of together, but when he grabbed my boob ‘by accident’ I decided that was it. Lucky he didn’t reach between my legs. Even though I’m kind of strapped in, he might have noticed.”
Julian shrugged.
“Anyway, no biggie. Harper and I danced again a little. It’s the kind of place you can ask anyone you feel like asking to dance. So I picked another cute guy and went up and asked him.”
Julian looked out at the garden a moment.
“And, Julian?”
“And it was great, Dad. Just great. I mean, Harper’s the one, she’ll always be the one in my life, but we know there will be others, too.”
Julian’s turn to kiss Harper. He laughed, or maybe snorted.
“I mean, we’re not swingers, Dad, but we’ve had a little fun with others, right?”
I nodded. His mother and Sarah and I had enjoyed the company of others from time to time.
“Funny thing is,” Julian continued, “we actually talked, this guy and me. Not easy in that place.
“‘Want to sit down?’ he asked. Ahmed was his name. ‘Your friends won’t mind, will they?’
“I looked over at Harper and the girls and waved. They laughed. ‘Nope,’ I answered. So we sat down. Ahmed was easy to talk to. The kind of guy who listens more than he talks.”
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