Klaatu Barata NiktoChapter 6
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DatoPorn free porn video
Dato Porn! If you are a porn lover worth your salt and pepper avocado toast, you must know your way around Google and are probably familiar with the ‘porn’ rule on the internet. If you have ever thought about it, someone has already made porn of it. No wonder you fucks are camping at sites offering incest smut because y’all have fantasized about screwing your own fucking sisters at some point.
The thing is, in this digital era, you can polish your cocks to whatever the fuck your lust demons demand. You can get whatever you genitals desire with the swipe of a screen or a few mouse clicks. You fools should count yourselves lucky you are living in the era of the internet. With just a working internet connection and some lube, you can while away the weekend jerking off to practically all the porn you want. Wanna grow hair on your palms? Be my fucking guest.
However, there are literally millions of sites offering you fap materials, and deciding which one has the best porn is like attempting to figure out what women like. Trust me, that’s not something you want to be doing. Luckily for you sneaky bastards, that’s where The Porn Dude comes in. I spend countless hours on the internet, taking a closer look at porn sites to guide you in the right direction when it comes to identifying porn sites to blow your load over.
My analysis of Datoporn.co
Today is yet another day when I come bearing goodies that occur in the shape of Datoporn.co, a free source of porn covering all your twisted fantasies. It is basically a porn tube, but with one twist, the materials here are user uploaded. There are thousands of free fuck flicks uploaded by porn-loving freaks who know their filth like the back of their hands. Does it sound like somewhere you’d spend a boring evening? Keep reading.
Awful design for starters
I start DatoPorn’s review on a negative note; the ugly ass design. Wait a damn minute, who even names their site Dato Porn? The first thing I saw when I landed here was the bright background that certainly won’t do you any favors if you are browsing at night. I’m assuming all my readers are productive people that have no time to watch porn during the day. Like I’ve said time, and again, all porn sites should be compelled to have a dark mode feature. After all, you don’t want to lose your sight in the process of losing your sperms, do you?
DatoPorn looks pretty dull and is as attractive as the STI infested whore you got from the backstreets last night. I don’t mean to brag, but they could learn a thing or two from The Porn Dude. Anyway, content is presented to you in thumbnails that are unfortunately not animated, and you have no choice but to click the thumbnail open to see what’s inside. If this is a consolation, thumbnails show the date of upload as well as length, and most of the uploads seem to be full-length videos, some running for almost 3 hours! Good luck surviving the fap marathon. Also, you can sort the videos by featured, most rated, and latest.
The lack of aesthetics aside, DatoPorn is actually a pretty simple porn site. They have a header with multiple tabs that include Categories, Make money, and Premium. On the top right is a basic search feature and options to register, which you will have to if you are keen on uploading videos. The site could do a lot to improve the site design and overall outlook, but at least it is not cluttered, and there are no flashy banners on the main page.
The allure of free porn
There are loads of porn sites out there dealing with premium porn, which you have to pay through your nose to access. I understand you are not ready to pay to masturbate, which is why I told you I’m here to help. Whether it’s a brand new car or just chicken nuggets, free stuff makes you happy. I’m all for you fucks to pay for porn and support the industry to provide more quality fuck flicks, but trust me when I tell you I know the struggle with paid porn. What to do if you are broke as fuck and just came home from the club with a raging boner that the bitches in the club couldn’t take care of? Your only remedy is free porn.
The good news is all the content found on this site is free. The team at DatoPorn has created a platform where users can upload porn for you to beat meat over without costing you a dime. There is no way of knowing the number of videos or how much content is here since there is no browsing menu. Still, the site is promising more than 1000 free porn videos every day. Well, I would take that with a grain of salt if I were you, but you will still find plenty to get off with multiple new videos added every day.
The videos play pretty smoothly, although pressing play initially directs to outside sources. Some of the videos required me to watch an ad for a whole 15 fucking seconds. Well, I guess that the price you pay for being a stingy asshole. Needless to say, the videos are not the quality stuff you may get somewhere else for some bucks. However, they are pretty watchable. Videos have a download button, but it kept directing me to some stupid looking sites with no download insight. Fucking frustrating.
Taking care of your blue ball problems
One area where you can’t fault the site is their ability to provide you with porn covering all your crazy fantasies. They have categories for anal porn, HD, beach, blowjob, ebony, facials, interracial, incest, lingerie, masturbation, and orgy, among others. You can also find location-specific porn from places like Japan, Spain, Asia, and the Czech Republic, among others. There is also a list of tags that should help you further refine your searches to fit your tastes. The number of videos per category has been indicated, which should actually give you a clue of just how much porn lies in wait. There are 15,328 scenes under the HD category alone.
Make money while at it
You read that right, fellas! DatoPorn gives you loads of money for merely visiting their site. That was meant to be a fucking joke, slow motherfucker. No one is ever going to provide you with money for stroking your cock. However, in an attempt to encourage members to post high-quality content, the site offers to pay users for every 10,000 views for the videos uploaded. The minimum payment is $50, although there is a catch; payment is made in tiers, and what you get is going to depend on where you are. There are a few rules to be followed, as well. Just click on Make Money and follow the instructions.
It also turns out you can grab a premium account, which inevitably comes with its perks, including unlimited downloads and all that crap. A monthly membership will cost you around 10 bucks. Whether that’s ultimately worth it is your choice to make.
The best of DatoPorn
Free porn; arguably, the site’s main pull is their ability to provide you with free fap materials. There are thousands of videos here that you can jerk off to for absolutely free.
Prospects of making money; the site offers some monetary incentives to users whose uploaded videos get a certain amount of views.
Categories; the collection of porn is diverse and covers tens of fantasies, and it is highly likely you are going to come across your favorite genre.
Possible concerns
Ads; the video playing experience is filled with annoying advertising and redirects, which makes playing videos a frustrating process.
Awful design; the site design looks bland, and uninspiring could use efforts to make it modern and visually appealing.
How the site can improve
There are plenty of improvements the website can make starting with going slow on the ads. They should probably seek other income-generating methods to make it easier for users to stream the videos. While at it, can someone from the site see to it that the download button is fucking working? Also, the website should provide users with a browsing menu, which is a glaring omission for a site with a vast collection.
Conclusion
Free, user-submitted porn is the rule of the game at DatoPorn. If you are looking for a place to get off thousands of videos without paying a dime, this is it. There is a respectable collection of videos covering multiple categories, and new ones are added daily. Is it the best free porn site? Nowhere near, but beggars cannot be choosers, remember?
Hortense
- 07.03.2023
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