Therapy V. 02 free porn video

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Hi, everybody. My name is Edge23 and I’m afraid of death. Which is funny if you think about it, because I know intellectually that it happens to everyone and there’s nothing you can do about it, but there are nights when I finally falls asleep from exhaustion because the thought of death sends me into a panic attack. Which doesn’t help anything, because then I worry about what the lack of sleep is doing to me, which just creates a vicious cycle.

My palms get sweaty and my heart feels like a jackhammer against my chest. I can tell I go into fight or flight mode, even though there’s nothing I can do. My breathing gets shallow and my hands curls up into fists. Now if I just had something to fight against. I have to move to get the excess energy out of my system or I start bouncing around like an over-sugared kid on a pogo stick. My jaw clenches, which in turn makes my head hurt, which makes me angry.

I’ve been to counseling and we think we figured out what the problem is. I don’t like being unprepared and I have no idea what happens after you die. Do you go to Heaven/Nirvana or Hell/Hades or Valhalla or Olympus or the Seven Heavens? Is it the Abyss or the windswept plains of Archeron? Are you reincarnated? Can you be resurrected? Is there a Purgatory that you simply wait in for something to happen? Or do you simply cease to be? I think that one frightens me the most, because I don’t want to just ‘not be,’ you know? The others I could deal with, even if it’s Hell. At least I’d still be around. Even Purgatory would be an improvement, though from what I’ve read, it can be kinda boring. But it’s the not knowing for sure that cause the panic.

I was raised in a church and believed in God and Heaven and everything that goes with it. When I got older, I realized that church wasn’t for me, what with various beliefs and doctrines, so I stopped going. I finally settled on that I believe that there is SOMETHING out there, but not ‘God’ as he/she was presented to me when I was a child. Some part of my brain just couldn’t handle all of the crap that was served to me on the silver platter that was organized religion. So, here I am without something to believe in when, apparently, I need something. I’ve thought about medication for anxiety. I’ve talked to my doctor and read through the effects and side-effects. I don’t think meds are the answer.

It’s the worst at night. I go to bed, feeling very peaceful, and then something happens to trigger thoughts of death in my mind and if I’m lucky, I can get rid of them. Other nights, they stay there at the front of my mind, so that no matter what I think about or if I get out of bed to do something else, they’re still there. Even trying to write doesn’t help because I’m too tired to focus. Sleeping pills don’t help, because I need at least ten hours to burn them out of my system. Even with a shit-ton of caffeine in the morning, I’m still groggy until about ten hours. Since I need that much time and I have to get up at 6:15 to be to work on time, that would mean taking them at no later than 8:15, which would seriously cut into the very, very small amount of time I get to spend with my wife. And believe me, that ain’t happening.

Hopefully by getting this all out on ‘paper,’ it’ll help the process. I can’t imagine it can hurt. Just know that everything in this ‘story’ is rhetorical and honestly, I don’t want to start a conversation with a complete stranger about his topic.

Maybe someday I’ll get it all figured out and then the panic will stop. Maybe I should go back to church and pick up where I left off. Do churches give money back for tithes or the money spent on the white clothes for baptism? Somehow, I doubt it. They’ll claim us even for saving my immortal soul or something. I didn’t know my soul was worth about four hundred dollars and probably another twenty-five for the clothes. Can you eBay a soul? Now THAT would be a sale. But I’m digressing. Probably because I can feel a panic attack starting.

Thanks for listening. I hope this all helps. Wish me luck.

E23.

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Canine attraction

We were chatting about the attraction of dog sex, and I said “I'd love to talk more about a dog eating your pussy”. Your face lit up, and I continued. “ I would want you get on your back on the floor, and I swat your ass until it's bright red, stopping only to swat your pussy. And as your pussy opens up in excitement my crop hits your clit, you squeal but you love it”You are interested in my story and I lie back, relaxing on the sofa and spin my tale:“I let in my dog who immediately starts to...

2 years ago
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Lifes Choices

Every choice has a consequence, every consequence effects your "morality", for good or evil. One choice may say something like: +1 good, another may say: +1 evil. Here are the four characters, and a little about them: Henry- The second son of a minor land owning nobleman. His father owns a small castle, and a small farming town. He has an older brother, and a younger sister. He's born in 1172. Morality starts at 0. Louis- A poor peasant farmer. Born in 1165. Will he get married and work hard,...

BDSM
1 year ago
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Tommy Part 30

"Tommy"By Gentile Part 30---------"I swear to God."---------"I was going to take my jeans and panties down and off and have you do it to me in your cruiser, Tommy."He was heading to his release when Girl initiated conversation:"I love my jeans. You bought those jeans for me at Brandeis, remember? (area department store where prices are too high for Girl Castleberry) Yes, I was going to take my jeans off and my panties down, the ones you bought me at the Woolco. I only wear the panties you buy...

3 years ago
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Ghost StoriesChapter 5

After what seemed like passing over to eternity, he kept on hearing people talking. Peter regained consciousness, with his eyes blinking. The light from the sky was blinding at first but he slowly got used to it. He heard someone say, " ... it looks like he is returning back to the land of the living..." As Peter gained full awareness, he realised that he was lying on his back on the ground, with three grown men in their 50s. They were fishermen. Two of them were standing and one of them...

2 years ago
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Path To GloryChapter 22

Bailey fared better in her second tournament. She made the cut but was still far back on the leaderboard. Still, for a 17-year-old amateur, I was pretty impressed. Both of our birthdays fell on the following week — which was good because it was an off week from her travels. The U.S. Women's Open was two weeks away and it was being played about an hour from Virginia Beach. I considered driving over, but I knew Bailey wanted time to prepare for the tournament. I did manage to have 18 roses...

1 year ago
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A Happy Thanksgiving With my Cousin

This story is completely fictional! It had been a few months since I had seen my cousin Sara and when she got to my house for thanksgiving I was stunned at how sexy she looked. Since I had seen her last, she had cut her hair and more importantly developed a nice set of tits. Not too big and not too small, just perfect for a track runner like she was. She had a slim body but which I loved to stare at. When everyone arrived I took their coats and threw them on my bed, Sara came with me and threw...

Incest
4 years ago
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Part 4 Busty Young Liz Does The Gardener

Liz had recently enjoyed her first big cock. It was her first fuck that she really instigated outside of her relationship with her boyfriend. Jeff just happened to be around when her boyfriend was away on holiday, and it just felt right to go back with him that night. There were no regrets either, although she had been unfaithful, the moment of pleasure far outweighed the guilt.She had been unfaithful before, but with Jeff it was really of her making, she went out looking for it, and lucky for...

Anal
1 year ago
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Human ManChapter 22

Scott was having coffee and a pleasant conversation with Connie. She was asking about Levall, when the wayward Mendoza daughter stumbled into the kitchen. Janie's hair was frizzy, and she was wearing an old nightshirt over pajama bottoms several sizes too small. "You're alive," her mother said. "I don't feel like it," Janie grumbled. Hair covered the young woman's face and she didn't look up. She moved like an automaton to the coffee machine, grabbed a mug from the cupboard and...

3 years ago
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Pricking Massage

I have read several great stories over the years and this inspired me of sharing an encounter that happened with me a few months ago. The incidence is completely true other than the names which I have changed to conceal the identity. My name is Rahul -30 years old I am 5’6’’ tall and have a slim body and I am based out of Mumbai. I met Neha at a common friends place at my home town about 12-14 years ago. We became very good friends and applied to various Universities after passing out of...

3 years ago
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My First MFM threesome turned into way more

This story is about a true event that happened in my life; however, I will not disclose the real names of the people in the story. Nobody has the right to publish or use my story without my written permission, enjoy! I met a couple who I will call Tom and Jessica the first time I went to a nudist camp north of Dallas. They were sitting in a wood line area and I was just floating around the camp look around and enjoying my first nudist experience. As I walked past them, they said hi, I said hi...

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