SRU Reforming the Brat
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SRU: Dan's Redux free porn video
SRU: Dan's Redux
By JDCopyhack
Wisps of dust billowed from the floor as the wizard moved impatiently between
the front counter and the back storeroom. The last of the Christmas decorations
had finally been put away and business would soon get back to normal.
The holiday season was an exceptionally busy time of year for Spells R Us, with
so many people looking for that last minute novelty gift. Little did they know
what surprises awaited them on Christmas Day.
The wizard chuckled at this thought, then turned his attention to setting up a
new floor display. There would be a lull in business for the next couple of
weeks, but Valentine's Day was fast approaching and he had to get his shop
ready.
He was struggling to put Tab B into Slot 2 when his attention was diverted by
the sound of the bell signaling that a customer had entered his store. When he
looked up, he saw a familiar face, but not because it had been plastered on the
cover of countless sports magazines or was regularly featured on the ESPN
highlights. It was because he was a former customer.
The hair was shorter than it had been when he first walked through the wizard's
door some 16 years ago, and the face had lost its youthful exuberance. But the
eyes told the true story. Bags were formed beneath each one and the sparkle had
disappeared. This was a man in obvious despair.
As the man strode toward the counter, the wizard noticed his limp was more
pronounced. Then he spoke.
"I've been looking all over for you old man," Dan Marino said. "I've been to
every mall in every city we have played in the past three years."
"Remember, I told you I move around a lot," the wizard answered. "So, how do you
like Seattle?"
"It's cold and it's rainy and I can't wait to get out of here," the aging
quarterback of the Miami Dolphins answered. "I'm just glad the Seahawks play in
a dome."
"Ah, yes, the playoffs start this week."
"Yeah, that's why I'm here. I'm sure you have heard that people think I've lost
it."
"Yes, I watch SportsCenter on occasion."
"Well, then you know everyone thinks I should retire. You should hear the jerks
on the sports talk radio stations. Saying that I should hang it up before I
embarrass myself. What do they know about football? And you should see the
headlines in the papers. Even my coach thinks I'm shot."
"You mean Jimmy," the wizard interjected. "He has no room to talk. He must have
forgotten how I helped him out with that Herschel Walker trade."
"Yeah, well, that's not exactly my problem, is it?"
"No, it's not. So, tell me Dan, how can I help you this time?"
"Jimmy's sure to cut me or trade me after this season, and I don't want to
finish my career with the Saints. Or worse yet, the Bengals. So, this is it,
I've decided. But I want to go out a winner."
"But you are a winner, Dan. Look at all you've accomplished. Over 61,000 yards
passing. More touchdown passes than anyone has ever thrown. You're a legend."
"Hey, the records are great, but after you gave me that spell, I expected to win
championships."
"That's not what you asked for, Dan. Remember? You specifically told me you
wanted to be the greatest quarterback of all time. And many people regard you as
such. Isn't that enough?"
"Not now it isn't. Everyone thinks Joe Montana and John Elway were the greatest.
I can still throw a football 20 yards farther than noodle arm Montana ever
could. And Elway? Everyone thinks he's a god now that he's won two Super Bowls.
But he couldn't win squat until Terrell Davis came along."
"But, it's not like you haven't had your chance."
"You mean the '85 Super Bowl? Our defense played like Swiss cheese that day.
Besides, I always thought I'd get another chance. Hell, Jim Kelly got four
shots. Even Jim Plunkett played in two Super Bowls. I just want one more chance
at winning a championship."
"So, it's really that important to you?"
"Yes."
"Okay, let me see what I have in the back."
A few minutes later, the wizard returned clutching a bottle of Gatorade.
"Here, this should help."
Dan took the bottle from the wizard's hand and examined the label. It looked
like an ordinary bottle of Gatorade, but the liquid was a color he had never
seen before.
"I must warn you, my friend. The magic inside that bottle is very powerful. All
it will take is just one sip right before game time."
"So, this will work? Guaranteed?
"Didn't my previous spell work?"
"Umm, okay. How much?"
A glint filled the wizard's eyes.
"One million dollars."
"What, are you crazy? Last time you only charged me a thousand."
"Last time you weren't a multi-million dollar quarterback, who makes even more
through endorsements."
"I don't exactly carry that kind of money around with me, you know."
The wizard handed him a phone.
"Here, call your business manager. He can have the money wired to my account."
Dan looked at the bottle again.
"It's guaranteed to work?"
"Guaranteed to help you win your championship, or your money back."
Dan took the phone from the wizard's hand and dialed.
***
As both teams took the field, the pre-game hype was exactly as Dan expected.
Both ESPN and CBS ran lengthy features on his record-filled career. The
newspapers countered with headlines like "Is this Dan's last fling?"
His wife, Claire, would surely get a chuckle out of that one.
When his name was announced as part of the starting lineup, the Seahawks fans
him a respectful ovation. As the murmur died down, Dan reached into his
equipment bag and took out the bottle of Gatorade. Putting the bottle to his
lips, he took a healthy sip, and then placed the bottle back in his bag. But
when he started to jog out onto the field, he noticed the pain in his shoulder,
the result of an injury that kept him on the sidelines for over a month, was
worse than usual.
Disregarding the wizard's instructions, he returned to his equipment bag,
removed the bottle, and took another sip.
***
It took Dan half the first quarter to find his rhythm, but when he did, things
really started to click. Despite an early 7-0 deficit, he guided the Dolphins to
three quick scores to take a 21-7 halftime lead. He felt younger and stronger
than he had in years. He had little difficulty avoiding the rush and was
throwing with pinpoint accuracy.
"Hey, Dan, you need to stop looking downfield so much," Jimmy Johnson
unexpectedly demanded amidst the halftime euphoria. "Safe passes, remember? I
don't want any turnovers in the second half."
"Damn him," Dan thought as his coach walked away. "I'm playing my best game of
the season and he's still not satisfied."
Dan then reached into his locker for the bottle of Gatorade. Considering the
wizard gave him a 32-ounce bottle, he would have plenty left to help the
Dolphins make their Super Bowl run. He took another sip.
***
The second half started much the same as the first half ended, with Dan leading
his team quickly downfield. But with his team facing a second and eight from the
Seahawks 22 yard-line, Dan started to feel woozy. And as he barked out the
signals, he felt a tingling in his hands that caused him to fumble the snap from
center. The Seahawks recovered.
Sitting on the bench along the sidelines, Dan flexed his hands in an effort to
stop the tingling, to no avail. When he looked down, he noticed they seemed
smaller and finer. The tingling sensation started to spread up his arms and into
his upper body. Suddenly, his shoulder pads felt lose and he felt an
uncomfortable itching in his chest. But there was no time to adjust his
equipment as the Dolphins regained possession of the ball on the Seahawks 35-
yard line following an interception.
Dan trotted back onto the field looking to make amends for his earlier mistake.
As he did, he noticed the ever-present ache in his knees, something he had felt
since his days at the University of Pittsburgh, had mysteriously disappeared.
Leading his team back to the line of scrimmage, Dan once again barked out the
signals, only to hear his voice crack. Once again he fumbled the center snap,
but was fortunate to recover the ball. Jimmy Johnson fumed on the sidelines and
signaled for Damon Huard to start warming up. Dan noticed the activity on the
sidelines and was determined to show-up his egotistical coach.
Johnson had called for a running play, but Dan changed the call in the huddle.
Approaching the line of scrimmage, he felt a strange tickle creeping down the
back of his neck followed a sharp tug within his groin, causing his cup to slip
out of place. This time, when he called out the signals, his voice was soft and
lyrical.
For the first time in three plays, he handled the center snap cleanly and
dropped back to pass. He could barely see downfield and by now, his uniform
seemed practically huge. The large helmet spun on his head, further obscuring
his vision. To avoid the on-coming rush, he decided to throw the ball deep
downfield, where it would either be caught for a touchdown or fall harmlessly
out of reach. The ball barely traveled five yards.
At that same moment, Cortez Kennedy crushed Dan to the turf. Everything went
black.
***
Two years later, Salt Lake City Olympics...
The applause of the crowd reached a deafening crescendo as the tiny figure on
the ice completed her program. It was a flawless presentation that propelled her
past Michelle Kwan into first place. Later, tears of joy streamed down her
cheeks as the Gold Medal was draped around her neck.
Sixteen year-old Daniela Marino finally won her championship.
***
In a nearby mall, the wizard turned off the television set and smiled. A few
minutes later, a hulking figure stepped into his shop. Karl Malone, the great
forward of the Utah Jazz, had grown tired of finishing each season as an
also-ran and decided to seek the wizard's help.
"Wait here," he told the NBA All-Star Forward. "I may have just the thing..."
The End.
Bree
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