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A Time to Every Season Part III By Tigger Copyright 2002, All Rights Reserved Chapter 1: The Morning After The only evidence of the late fall-dawn was the barest of brightening in the otherwise gray-clouded eastern skies. Audrey sat watching the sunrise beneath the now-leafless rose arbor in Jane's English garden. Odd how that had, over the time she'd been at Seasons House, become the place that drew her when she needed to think or needed to be alone. At first, it had been the scent of the roses that had drawn her - their perfume lingering even after those first hard frosts of autumn had burned away their petals and their blooms. Now, there was an austere beauty to the tangle of thorny vines that wound about the wooden frame of the arbor - something that said "peace" to the disturbed young woman. Audrey had come to this special, private spot immediately after her morning workout with Darryl - not that it had been all that much of a workout. She was still tired from last night's outing, and in all honesty, was more than just a little bit sore - particularly in her ankles and the backs of her calves. My Fair Lady could sing all she wanted to about how she 'could have danced all night and still come back for more', but Audrey suspected that she hadn't been trotting about in tight shoes with three-plus inch toothpicks for heels. *Lord, but my legs haven't been this sore since the day I discovered, and overdid, my first StairMaster.* Fortunately for her ego, Darryl had not been at the top of his game this morning either - at least athletically. In other areas, however, he'd been top of the mark which was a good deal of the reason she'd sought some solitude before going in for breakfast. In truth, she'd already planned to come here in order to sort through the morass last night's trip to Boston had made of her emotions. Then, Darryl had compounded everything and somehow made everything MORE mixed up. How could he DO something like that to her? She TRUSTED him, LIKED him - okay, she LIKED him a LOT - and he did THAT to her? He'd kissed her. Well, it had actually been more than that because he'd been kissing her for awhile now, but those were little pecks - gently sweet caresses. Not this time - this time Darryl had KISSED her - like those male actors kissed the heroines in those movies that Marie had been taking Audrey to see in Kingston - chick flicks, she called them. She'd never seen it coming, either. Just as she was about to head up the path back to Seasons House, that little sneak had spun her around to face him and then all but swept her off her feet with a knee-weakening kiss that had turned her mind to mush for goodness only knew how long. Still, it was only a kiss. *Yeah, Audrey, and a diamond is only a rock. As if I did not have enough on my mind, trying to deal with why, lovely as everything was last night, it somehow felt incomplete, like something very important was missing.* And then, he'd given her a present while he still held her boneless body next to his. Audrey looked down at the brightly colored bouquet of maple leaves she still held in her hands. They outshone, in every possible way, the gorgeous corsage that Kenneth had given her last night. *And you know why they do, Audrey. These leaves are the first 'flowers' that a boy who matters ever gave you. The boy who you were really missing last night. Might as well face facts, girl. Last night would have been perfect if it had been Darryl escorting you and not Kenneth.* Audrey carefully set her leaves down and rose from the bench seat to walk about the garden. The chilly wind reminded her that she had not changed out of her sweats and breakfast was not all that long off. She ought to go to her room, but she still needed to think. Audrey hadn't liked the feelings that had coursed through her when Darryl's mouth and tongue had taken possession of hers like that. Had she? *Be honest, young miss,* her mind chided in an unconscious emulation of Jane Thompson's admonitory tones. *What you aren't sure you LIKE is how much you DID like what he did.* That little revelation did nothing to improve her mood. Unfortunately, she really did have to go clean up and dress for the morning meal. Dealing with one of Jane's inventive disciplines would only serve to further muddy the already murky issues. Trying to remember to talk baby-talk when she was otherwise trying to figure out how she really felt about Darryl's sudden escalation of this boy-girl stuff was more than enough for one person to deal with at one time. *Before last night, if someone had asked me what I would do if some boy just up and kissed me without permission, I'd have answered 'Kill him, of course, and very, very slowly. Even after last night, I would have said I'd back his pushy butt off somehow. But THAT wasn't just any boy, and THAT kiss, well, that was not at all what I expected being kissed that way would be like. And dammit, I DID like it and I think... know, that I would like it again, too.* Somehow, confronting that bit of self honesty seemed to put things somewhat back into perspective. Her emotions calmed a little and the world seemed to slow back down to a more normal speed. It wasn't much, but it was enough for the moment. *At least until after I have survived breakfast,* she mused, turning toward the garden door. *If I skimp on the shower, I will have time to dress and put on enough make up to dodge the pinafores and corset bullet.* Just before she reached the corner, the door slammed open, and a laughing, auburn-haired flash raced out the door, with a tall, slender white-haired man in hot pursuit. Hidden by the corner, Audrey watched in dumbfounded fascination as the man who had escorted Jane to the ballet chased the ordinarily stern and controlled teacher about the garden. *And she's still in her nightgown and slippers!* Audrey thought amazed. *and no robe, either.* "ARTEMIS," Jane yelled, a hysterical giggle almost bubbling through, "Stop this INSTANT. I don't have time for this. The girls will be down for breakfast and I haven't dressed." "Then stop trying to run away, wench, and give me my kiss!" "You'll want more than a kiss, you rogue, and I don't have time for this!" Jane reiterated, dodging behind one of the stone benches. She almost made it, Audrey thought, giving credit where credit was due, and probably would have except that she stubbed her toe on the cold stone of the bench as she dodged again. Audrey made a mental note never to try to play keep-away with a man when she was wearing open-toed high-heeled mules for slippers. That momentary stumble was all this 'Artemis' fellow needed. He closed the gap and swept Jane up in an embrace that reminded Audrey eerily of how she must have looked when Darryl had caught her. Jane's protests lasted one, maybe two seconds at most before she was returning the kiss with fervor, enthusiasm and what Audrey recognized as a good deal of practical experience. *Have to remember that fingers-through-the-hair grip thing next time Darryl jumps my bones,* she thought dreamily before realizing what that image of herself and Darryl actually implied. *Yes,* Audrey thought with a sigh, *there WILL be a next time and that I AM looking forward to it.* Only then did the young woman snap out of her surprise-induced fugue enough to realize she was intruding. Quietly, she retraced her steps and headed for the kitchen door, leaving the two older folks to their privacy. ~-~ Art came up for air and looked down into the passion-darkened eyes of his wife. "Gotcha," he gloated softly. "Oh, just shut up and kiss me some more," Jane ordered, her voice husky. "Your wish, my dear," Art replied as he caught a glimpse of Audrey's retreating form. *Oops,* he thought, and just for a moment considered telling Jane. *Nah,* he concluded as he once again surrendered to the power of his lover's kiss. *Nothing she can do about it now, anyway. After breakfast will be soon enough. 'sides, looks like Audrey can use a few extra minutes to get ready for breakfast.* Chapter 2: Love - Vulnerability and Strength Jane lifted her hand to knock on the antique paneled door and then, for probably the third or fourth time, let her hand fall back to her side. It wasn't that she was hesitant - not really - it was more like she wasn't sure how best to approach this situation. As with most situations that she had been forced to deal with since taking on this particular student, this one was unique in Jane's experience. Never before had a student seen her, the cultured living embodiment of Miss Manners, cavorting about in her night shift with a man. Now, Jane was intent on some type of damage control. The problem was she had absolutely no idea what type of damage she had to control. The only thing about which she was sure was that the longer she delayed this face-to-face with Audrey, the longer any anger or upset the girl might have suffered would fester. *Damn Art, anyway,* she fumed silently. *He should have done something out there instead of sticking me with this little drama. What I should do is go back to my room, stuff him into a Lewis Carrol-authentic 'Alice-in-Wonderland' outfit, maybe a nice big pacifier to keep his sneaky and tasty mouth busy, and then drag him up here to Audrey's room by his ear! Maybe that would reassert my position as the Alpha Female in this house.* A smile that was at once both familiar and terrifying to almost one hundred boys crossed Jane's lips only to disappear just as quickly. "Remember Sheila, Jane Thompson," she reminded herself aloud, as she had uncountable times since her confrontation with Kenneth's vile and perverse mother. "It's all right to have fun with this, so long as no one is ever truly hurt." Sighing at the still-pleasantly seductive mental imagery, Jane then steeled herself and managed to give the door a reasonable facsimile of her usual authoritative knock. "Come in," came the response. Jane entered Audrey's room and came up short at the sight that greeted her. Audrey, resplendent in a soft cream and rose colored Laura Ashley skirt and sweater set, was sitting in front of her vanity mirror. From where she stood, Jane could see that her charge had been applying makeup - quite well, too, Jane was pleased to note - and had done something more intricate than was her normal preference with her coiffure. Opaque stockings hugged the girl's muscular yet shapely legs. Force of long habit had Jane's eyes dipping down to check the entire ensemble whereupon she repressed a small sigh. While the lovely rose-suede pumps matched perfectly with the rest of the girl's outfit, they were still low-heeled. Even with almost thirty pairs of new shoes to her name since her arrival at Seasons House, all Italian no less, getting Audrey into anything with more than a two inch heel took a direct order. Jane wondered if it had anything to do with her student's self image - whether Audrey felt she was too tall even without heels. *She looked so regal last night when she wore those strappy red spikes, not to mention drop-dead gorgeous with all that leggy beauty in the slit-skirt gown, that it would be a shame if she couldn't accept her own statuesque beauty. I think a bit of 'hinting' from Darla may be in order,* Jane thought, *but there are more important issues to deal with at this precise moment.* "You look very nice," Jane said quietly as she moved toward the girl. Then she saw the colorful mass of autumn leaves on Audrey's bed. "What have we here?" Audrey started to say something, reconsidered and attempted a diffident shrug. "Leaves. We don't get color like this back home. They're so pretty, but I really don't know what to do with them." *More to this than that,* Jane thought. *The girl has no skill at dissembling, but I won't press her on it.* "Marie might be able to help you do something with them. She is very much into crafts using natural materials and such things. I suspect she'd know a way of preserving them if they're something you'd like to keep for a while...as mementoes." "Perhaps I will see Marie. Thank you, Ms. Jane. You wanted something from me?" *Her poise has definitely improved. That little barb was well and subtly delivered. Translation: What do you want THIS time, Thompson?* "I felt we needed to talk, Audrey, given what Art told me you saw this morning." "What I saw?" Audrey only barely managed to keep her voice from cracking in surprise. "Yes, dear. Art saw you in the English Garden, and he knows you saw us." "It is not my business," Audrey replied sharply, turning her head to hide the blush she knew was firing her cheeks. "That is true and yet, it is also not true, dear," Jane said gently as she moved to take a seat beside her student. "I am an adult woman and as such, my relationships are ordinarily no one's concern but my own. However, I have been demanding a very high standard of behavior from you over the past few months and you have every right to expect that I, as your mentor and role model, should adhere to the same codes of conduct that I insist upon for you." "I'm not going to use what happened this morning as an excuse to go out and find myself a lover, Ms. Thompson," Audrey said, even as she realized she wouldn't have to find one, because the one she wanted was already found. She just hadn't figured out how to reel him in yet. Or what to do with him once she'd landed him. "I have too many goals riding on your good opinion of me and my behavior." "Oh, that was a very nicely worded set-down, Audrey," Jane said with a hint of a smile. "Brava. Would you look at this, please?" Audrey turned from her mirror and was surprised to see Jane holding out her left hand to her student, palm down. For a moment, Audrey could not see the point and then her eyes locked on the left ring finger - the previously BARE left ring finger - now decorated by a large diamond solitaire and a wide wedding band, both ornately decorated with antiqued glyph-work and other markings. "Art is my husband, Audrey. He has been for the better part of a year." "But...but... he hasn't been here...you didn't wear those... .I don't understand... " Jane caught Audrey's hand in hers and drew her up from the vanity and over to sit beside Jane on the bed. Not releasing the hand, Jane began to speak. "When you came here, we did not know what to expect, except that you had a history of dealing, well, rather physically with men who upset you. Moreover, we really were not sure what men did that upset you to the point of violence. Since you had no similar history against females, we decided to give you a break-in period in a female-only household. Art had to leave to fulfill a contract obligation with a university in the city so he couldn't be here full time anyway. When I needed an escort, he was the obvious choice," Jane shrugged and turned dark eyes on Audrey. "Besides, I missed him terribly. I hadn't planned on him being here last night, but he followed me home... . " "So you decided to keep him?" Audrey blurted. Both women stared at each other for several moments, neither quite believing what the younger woman had just said, then they burst out laughing. "Just so," Jane said when she'd finally managed to regain a modicum of control. "Although the dear man was very persuasive," she added, wistfully. "And as I said, I have missed him terribly." "You must have," Audrey said, "Letting him ravish you that way in the garden." The girl hesitated and Jane saw that she wanted to say something more and so let the comment go unanswered. The silence drew out between them until Jane was not sure she could stand it when Audrey asked, her voice almost a whisper, "Doesn't that make you feel vulnerable? Knowing he's that important to you? Doesn't that give him power over you? I mean, he could really hurt you." Jane mulled that one over for a few moments, recalling Darla's revelations about that bitch of a governess and all the garbage she'd fed a young and lonely girl. *Give her the honest truth she knows first, Jane, and then the rest.* "Yes, he could hurt me, Audrey, and he has. Just as I can hurt him and have. But I will tell you that I felt more alive, more feminine, more loved during that silly little chase around the garden than I have in all the days he's been gone. Jane paused to let her student mull that over before continuing to press home her point. "There's always a risk when something is really important, Audrey. That's part of what makes that something valuable - and thrilling. Knowing that you are vulnerable gets your adrenaline flowing, and knowing that you are willing to do it - that you have found a prize that valuable - is a wonderful part of the reward. Winning a race where there is no competition is not as satisfying as winning when you aren't sure you can, until you have." *That got your attention, didn't it, you competitive little wench?* Jane thought fondly. "And laying your heart on the line is the greatest risk of all, for the greatest reward you can imagine. As you said, he could hurt me, but the final reward - the ultimate prize - is his love, and he loves me too much to ever hurt me except by accident." Audrey thought about that for a moment. Was that what was missing with Darryl? Had she been holding back? Playing defense and not taking the chances necessary to get the touches needed for victory? It definitely gave her something to think about. "And you love him just as much." It wasn't a question. Jane's face lit up with a smile that made her normally austerely handsome face breathtakingly lovely. "With all my heart. So much it sometimes frightens me, but it is a good kind of fright." "A good kind of fright?" Audrey was intrigued. She had come to understand the frightened part quite well in the past few hours. The idea of 'good fright' was something she had not considered. "It makes me try harder to show him how much I love him back. To show him how important he is to me. Life is short, dear, more so for me than for you, I think. I am closer to fifty than to thirty and have more of my life behind me than in front of me. The fear I spoke of pushes me to take every bit of love I can get and savor it to its fullest so that none of it goes unappreciated or unreturned." "That's lovely," Audrey breathed in a surprisingly girlish sigh. Then she turned serious eyes to her teacher. "Don't worry about this morning as far as I am concerned, Ms. Thompson. It's... .well, nice to see that kind of man-woman love, for real, I mean, and up close." *She's made so much progress,* Jane suddenly realized, *And not just in the superficial aspects of being a woman. I don't know what is the catalyst, but I think she's just about ready.* "Ms. Thompson?" Audrey broke in on Jane's thoughts. "When I first came here, you said that some of your students called you 'Jane' or 'Aunt Jane'?" Jane nodded, but otherwise said nothing. It was difficult to speak when you were holding your breath in hopeful anticipation. "Would you mind... I mean," Audrey hesitated for a moment, seemed to shake herself and then pressed on in a rush. "Would it be all right with you if I called you Aunt Jane?" Touched and a more than a little surprised, Jane leaned over to hug the younger woman. "I'd be honored if you would, dear," she said before standing and helping Audrey to rise also. Then she saw the leaves and smiled at her student. "Why don't you take those down to Marie right now. I am sure she will know how to preserve them." An smile of unexpected pleasure lit Audrey's face. "I think I will, Aunt Jane. I really would like to keep at least of few of them if I could." Chapter 3: Kisses and Bouquets - A Seasons Courtship Audrey tried to watch what Marie was doing, but almost scorched her own fingers when the hot flatiron slid across the waxed paper a little more easily than she'd anticipated. She returned her attention to the ironing board and nearly sighed. There, between two sheets of waxed paper was the largest, most perfectly shaped, most vividly hued of all the leaves from her bouquet. Autumn Maple Leaf Red was rapidly becoming her favorite color and she wondered idly if Carolyn Beale sold a lipstick or nail enamel in that shade. "Is this right, Tante Marie?" she asked, holding up the now-fused sheet for the older woman's inspection. Marie stopped what she was doing and examined Audrey's prize. Finally, she nodded. "See, Cherie? I told you that the wax would become transparent once you had everything properly ironed?" "Yes," the girl said with a happy smile. "And you're sure that this will preserve it?" Marie gave a sly grin. "Of course. Why I have such mementoes of my own, preserved just this way, pressed between the pages of my teenage diaries. And I am... well, we won't discuss my age, so let's just say that they were given to me many, many years ago." "By your Willie, Tante Marie?" Audrey asked, only to realize too late how painful that question might be for her friend. "Oh, Marie, I am so sorry... I did not mean to... Marie smiled and waved away the apology. "Non, ma petite, do not worry yourself so. Yes, many are from my Willie, and all the more precious to me because of that, but there are also memories of other beaus in those tightly wrapped pages." *but that question certainly does tell me why these pretty colored leaves are so very important to you, dear.* The older woman returned to her own project and carefully selected another leaf that she then dipped carefully into a thick, viscous white liquid. When she withdrew the now heavily coated leaf, she delicately brushed away the excess. Audrey watched as the liquid dried quickly, becoming clear as it did so. Marie waited until there was only a slight liquid sheen on the leaf before she began to shape it with agile, knowing fingers. Moments later, the red-orange leaf was added the other leaves, glued to a cloth covering an eight by ten inch board. "It is almost like you are doing flower arrangements except you're using that board and not a pot, and those aren't flowers," Audrey said, awe in her voice. "That's because I am, Audrey," Marie answered as she made a final, almost imperceptible adjustment to the last leaf. "There, I think that is just about right," she said as she stepped back from the brilliantly colored explosion of bright reds, vivid oranges and brilliant yellows. Marie picked up a small flower pot and began cutting it with a saw - making a vertical cut from the rim of the pot straight down to the bottom. When she'd finished, she examined the heavy orange clay thoroughly. "This will be perfect. I will just glue this to the frame so that it looks like the bouquet is in the pot, and then, tomorrow after all the glues and glazes have cured, I will spray it with some clear polyurethane." "It is so lovely," Audrey actually gushed. "Well, a girl's first bouquet of flowers from her boyfriend should be lovely." *I am glad Darryl did so well.* "Boyfriend? Who said anything about a boyfriend?" "No one, petite, but those are from Darryl, aren't they?" Caught off guard by the older woman, Audrey sighed and sat down into one of the kitchen chairs. "Yes," she finally admitted, wanting to say more, but not precisely sure how to raise the issue. "And?" she prompted gently. "And...and...well, he kissed me!" Audrey finally blurted. Marie turned to make some tea, in part because she was sure they would need some, but mostly to hide the happy grin that now curled her pert lips. "Well, you've told me he has done so before. You were quite taken aback as I recall. Had he stopped before this?" *If he did, I will personally tear a strip off his stupid male hide!* "Oh, no, that isn't it. I mean, he's managed to give me a little peck on the cheek or steal a hug every day we've worked out together. Today was different. Today he KISSED me. Bent me over backwards and everything." *ATTA BOY!* Marie's mind cheered. "Well, since you are keeping his gift, I can assume that you were not enraged by his taking of liberties?" Audrey burst out laughing at that. "You've been around Aunt Jane and her Victorian ways too long, Tante Marie. Taking liberties?" She laughed again before answering. "I think I liked it. No, that's not being honest - I KNOW I liked it. I just don't know what to do about it." "How so, petite?" "You know? You're the only one who has ever called me 'little one' and meant it nicely? I like that, too." "Glad to hear it, petite," Marie responded pertly but plainly refusing to acknowledge the girl's attempt at changing the subject. "Now answer my question. What don't you know about dealing with Darryl's kissing?" Audrey colored attractively, and tried to find the words to answer the question - and not only for Marie's benefit. "Well, it's the feelings, Tante Marie. They're just so scary and yet, at the same time, so wonderful...I just feel so...so off balance," and then, feeling very brave, blurted out, "And I want him to do it again! Soon!" "Oh ho, so you are content to wait for him to take the lead again? Bah! I thought you were a modern young woman" She saw the confusion on Audrey's face and smiled a very secret, very female smile at her young prodigy in the ways of l'amour. "Jane's views aside, petite, this is the dawn of a new millennium. There is simply no reason you can't take the initiative if that would make you feel better - more in control. Heavens, girl - start as you mean to go! IF you want him and you want him on fair and equal terms, try doing your own fair share of the courting." "Courting? Me?" The idea was terrifying. It was also incredibly exciting. "You!" Marie replied forcefully. "But I don't know how to do that," Audrey almost wailed. "It will be easy. He is, after all, only a mere man and you are a truly superior and beautiful young woman. Le Bon Dieu created women to tempt men and, fortunately, also made men easy to tempt. It is what we women do, darling. Start with something easy. He wants to kiss you. You want him to kiss you again. Next time you see him, bend HIM over backwards and ravage HIS mouth." Then Marie's eyes twinkled and her smile somehow became even more mischievous. "Slip him some tongue, girl." Marie watched as the girl let the idea roll around her head and could tell the precise moment when her apprentice's mind imagined how that kiss would feel. It was all Marie could do not to clap in glee at the look of excited anticipation that flashed across Audrey's lovely face. The girl rose, half in a daze and began to leave. "Take your waxed leaf, dear," Marie told her. "I will finish the other and then frame it for you once the preservative is completely dry." "Thanks again, Tante Marie," Audrey said distantly as she turned for the door. The last thing Marie heard before the door shut behind the departing girl was, "Courting?" As impossible as it seemed, Marie's grin grew even broader. "And Cherie? Mark him with some lipstick - BRIGHT lipstick - when you do it!" she called out, hoping the girl heard her. ~-~ For the remainder of the day, Darla noticed that Audrey was quieter than was her norm. Especially since she had healed from her surgeries, the girl's effervescent energy usually kept her constantly on the go, always doing something. This day, however, she was more sedate, her manner more introspective. Darla did not know whether to be happy or upset - whether to hope that it had been Darryl's attempt at a Rudolf Valentino-style kiss that had resulted in this quieter version of his love, or just fatigue. On one hand, she seemed to have been affected strongly by the experience. On the other, unfortunately, she did not seem to be reacting at all like young women in love were rumored to act. *Well, I guess that's to be expected. She had a late night and an early morning. I'm kind of dragging, too. I just wish she'd bring up Darryl's little farewell this morning so I can find out how she feels about it now that she's had time to think about it. Hmmm... what day of the month is it?* Darla took a quick look at the calendar she carried in her purse and sighed. *Almost that time of the month for Darla again. Well, at least I can be Darryl with her, but it sure does get boring pretending to be irritable and nauseous. The things I do for Momma-Jane.* Darla went to find Tante Yenta-Marie for some more pointers. This was getting more and more complicated and made Darla... or more correctly, DARRYL wish for an older simpler time. *Well, not too much older,* he thought with an irrepressibly male grin. *If Caveman Dar ever went after Cavewoman Rock with a club, it would, in all likelihood, be Dar who ended up with a lump on the skull and counting stars. Which, if she then dragged Dar off to her cave by the hair, wouldn't be all that bad a fate. It's just that I wish I knew if she would want to drag me off to her lair or leave my carcus for the buzzard-o-sauruses.* ~-~ Marie heard the door open and hurriedly hid her leaf and pot project in the pantry before turning to see Darla. *Ah, good thing I hid it. Wouldn't do for the scamp to realize just how deeply his little gift affected Audrey. He might get a little too cocky and stop trying quite so hard.* "Hi Tante Marie," Darla greeted her adopted aunt with a smile, a hug and a kiss. "Is that polyurethane I smell? What are you up to this time?" "Oh, just some craft stuff for the holidays. Decorations in the main,* she answered, trying to stay as close to the truth as she could before changing the subject. "So what brings YOU to my kitchen, miss?" Darla seemed to wilt and then plopped indecorously into a nearby chair. "What, or rather, WHO do you think?" "Ah, la tres jolie Mademoiselle Audrey," Marie said with great satisfaction. This was all going perfectly! "She did not like your plan for this morning?" "She seemed to like it - at least some - when I did it!" in her annoyance, Darla's voice dropped into Darryl's register for just a moment. "I caught her by surprise, but she didn't fight at all, and in only a moment or two, she really started to put her mind to..." Darla caught herself becoming perhaps a bit too graphic and consciously composed herself. Marie watched in amusement as the girl's sprawl shifted into a position more in keeping with her character of demure young womanhood. Darla coughed to clear her throat and then continued. "I was not the only one actively kissing," she finished primly. "And she did keep the silly bouquet of leaves I gathered for her... but I didn't see her bring them in the house and she hasn't seemed to show them to anyone." *So you not sure how she feels. Good, that will keep you trying. Still, a little encouragement wouldn't hurt.* "Well, I did help her preserve a leaf today. We ironed it into waxed paper so she could put it in her journal." "She did," Darla breathed, hope brightening her eyes. *I did say a LITTLE encouragement, you rogue.* "Yes, of course," Marie replied with careful nonchalance. "Jane has told her to record her thoughts about her time here, and she said it would be a good example of the pretty fall colors." "Oh," Darla sighed, the anxiety and uncertainty came back. She shrugged it off and turned back to Marie. "So now what do I do?" "What do YOU think you should do, Cherie?" Marie asked, very gently. Darla considered the question for several moments. "Maybe something a little less overt than this morning's kiss? Something friendly and affectionate, but not quite so..." She stumbled again, not wanting to say 'sexual' in front of Tante Marie. "Passionate?" Marie asked, a twinkle in her clear blue eyes. "That's it. What do you think?" Darla asked, hoping for reassurance from a competent, female-thinking authority. "Oh, I think that is not too bad a plan. If she was surprised by the... passionate kiss, or a bit uncertain, a little friendly affection might put her off-balance." "Okay, Tante Marie, and thanks." Marie watched the incredibly feminine figure glide from her kitchen. "But somehow, mon petit brave, somehow, I don't think it is the so-very-regal Audrey who will be put off-balance tomorrow." With that happy thought, Marie turned back to her meal preparations, humming a song that sounded suspiciously like a particular Brahms March. ~-~ "Marie?" Jane called as she strode into the kitchen after the evening meal. "Yes, Jane?" Marie had just finished filling the dishwasher and was busily wiping non-existent stains from her immaculate counters. "Do you know what is the matter with the children? Both of them have been very quiet all day." Marie looked at her long-time friend. She'd promised both young people to keep their discussions confidential. Should she tell Jane? She always had in the past when she knew something that her friend and employer needed or wanted to know, and yet, this was Darla...no, actually it was Darryl. *What would Jane do if she knew her son had fallen in love with her student and was trying to court the girl who had been raised to fear males? Darryl has been talking with Art - he told me that much, but has he, in turn, also spoken to Jane?* "Marie?" "Sorry, Jane, just wool gathering," Marie said as she reached a decision. "Besides them being tired from their big evening out last night? I have an idea about Audrey. I think she is struggling to decide how she feels about Darryl." "I thought as much. Did something happen - recently, I mean?" Jane's asked quietly. "I believe she got quite thoroughly kissed this morning and isn't precisely sure how to react to the fact that she enjoyed it. You know she has very little experience with men of any age, dear, but even less with boys her own age." "Art thought Darryl would do something after last night. He was, well, rather more upset about not able to be her escort than I had anticipated." "I like the match, myself," Marie said saucily. "In fact, I think they'll be perfect together." "She towers over him!" "I don't think our Darryl feels the least bit threatened by her size," Marie tossed back with a grin. "What about Audrey? I gather she doesn't mind towering over him?" Marie snorted out a laugh and Jane found herself feeling foolish. "Of course she doesn't. If anything, she'll be all the more comfortable with a male version of the classic Regency 'pocket venus' as her consort. Lord, but this will be a complicated courtship. Oh, wait, did Darryl give her those leaves she was mooning about this morning?" "Yes. I believe he did. Audrey asked me for some help preserving them." "You think Darryl is good for her, then?" "Are you asking as Audrey's guardian or Darryl's Mother?" "Either. Both." "I think they're good for each other, Maman." "Part of the reason she is here is to learn to deal with other people without that violence that marred her recent years. She certainly handled herself well last night. I guess we sit back and watch," she said before adding, "But, if she hurts my boy." "Go cuddle your husband, Jane," Marie ordered her friend, amused exasperation in her voice. "You need some rest yourself. You were up late last night, too." "Oh, you," Jane breathed in affectionate exasperation. Then she bent down to kiss her friend's cheek and left the kitchen. *Maybe I will go jump Art,* she thought with a smile. *Retribution for this morning's garden chase.* Chapter 4: Resolution and Crisis The next morning found Audrey sitting alone in the Music Room, quietly fuming. *Face it, Rockwell, you flat wimped out. You had him in your sights and you just didn't take the shot.* Audrey had been out of bed earlier than usual this morning, so that she could pay particular attention to her face and hair, and she was sure that Darryl had noticed. She'd decided to run him hard that morning, so he wouldn't be quite so quick on his feet when she made her move just before they parted for breakfast. In her mind's eye is was all so REAL - she could feel the corded power of Darryl's tight, sinewy body as she dipped him backwards over her arms, could savor the vision of his eyes looking up - maybe just a little bit afraid - into hers, could almost smell the musky aromas of his sweat and arousal, and could almost taste his lips - parted in surprise - ready for her to ravage them. *God, just thinking about it makes me feel all shivery and edgy,* she fumed. It had ALL been there for her - just two short steps and he'd have been HERS! All she'd had to do was advance on her target, but at that critical moment when her victory was at hand, she'd retreated instead. She could just kick herself. *Okay, Rockwell, why did you back off? It's not like you haven't been that close to him and had his lips on yours. Except you were caught by surprise that time. THIS time, you knew going in you were going to be that close to a man, that you were going to be that open and that vulnerable. Cripes, you really are a wimp!* She jumped to her feet and paced about until she came to a stop in front of a window. *It's not as if you don't like and trust Darryl. Good grief, you wouldn't be even considering this if you didn't. So why couldn't you go through with it?* The question went unanswered as she resumed her pacing. *I mean, he's just a guy, right? Why can't you kiss a guy you really like? You ride horses, you shoot guns, you fence with swords,* and then she came to a stop. "Maybe that's IT!" she said aloud. *You've done all those things, but not the first time you tried,* she told herself firmly. *And you were definitely trying to run before you've walked...heavens, before you ever crawled.* She went back to the sofa and again sat down. *So, where do I learn how to handle a courtship as a girl? I suppose that is another of those things I missed out on thanks to Miss Phoebe Elizabeth. Lord, yet more girl-stuff you never got to learn, Rocky m'girl. Hmmm... girl-stuff, eh? Well, isn't it handy that I have my own personal teacher's assistant in Girl-stuff 101 who has nothing better to do than help initiate me into the dark, feminine mysteries of the hunt? Particularly since she knows this fellow so well already. Oh my, yes. Very handy indeed.* Smiling widely, Audrey jumped to her feet, and enthusiastically went off in search of Darla. ~-~ At the same time Audrey was berating herself in the Music Room, Darla was also more than a little preoccupied with what had gone on earlier that morning. Ever since breakfast, the young woman- with-something-extra had been distractedly staring out the window of the front parlor, her mind a confused morass of memories, feelings, fear and hope. *She was up to something this morning,* Darla told herself, *and then she changed her mind for some reason. Lord, but she'd looked fine - especially with that French braid trailing down her neck. That's the first time she's ever done anything more complicated than a ponytail with her hair.* *And there was that look she gave me, too. She couldn't have been more than three feet away from me - turned my brain to mush - froze me in my tracks. That must be what a deer feels like when the headlights hit it in the eyes.* *So WHY DIDN'T SHE DO ANYTHING!?!? Was it something I did? One second she is stalking me with this incredibly hungry look on her face, and the next she's trotting up the path to the house. Should I have given her some signal? Let her know that whatever she had in mind was fine with me? And just how the hell would you do that, Thompson-Smith? Fall on my back, spread-eagled, and yell 'take me, I'm yours?' Yeah, right. If she didn't die laughing, she'd stomp me into the mud.* *I have no freaking idea what she was thinking and therefore, no freaking idea what the hell I should do next, if anything. Guess that just goes to show that no matter how deeply I immerse myself in the feminine world, some part of me doesn't make the connection. Man, if Jane ever heard me cop out with 'I just don't understand women'... particularly the woman I want to make my own, she'd have my head on a platter. Maybe I should just go throw myself on Marie's mercy again. Hopefully, I can look sufficiently pathetic and inept so she'll give me a real hint this time.* "DARLA?" It was Audrey. "In here, Audrey." Darla called back. Audrey burst in, her skin flushed and eyes wide. The very air seemed to vibrate in time to her excitement. "I'm SO glad I found you," she bubbled as she rushed into the parlor. "I really need your help on something!" "Okay," Darla said cautiously. "This isn't going to get me on Aunt Jane's bad side, is it?" Audrey just shrugged, still grinning. "Nah... Well, probably not... as long as she doesn't know about it." "You're kidding, right?" Darla asked, frowning. "Jane always finds out about everything, and contrary to what you may think, I really DON'T like dressing like the caricature of a six-year-old playing tea party. Those starched petticoats are scratchy where I don't really like being scratched." "Never more serious," was the airy response. "And we'll be careful so she doesn't find out... too much." "Great. Ummmm...maybe you should tell me just what you want so I can decide if it's worth spending the next six months in those damned petti's, along with a tasteful assortment of equally uncomfortable pinafores and Mary Janes." "Okay. I wouldn't ask, but I just don't know how to do this, and you are the person Ms. Thom... I mean, Aunt Jane told me to talk to when I had questions about girl-things." *Girl things? Audrey wants to know about GIRL things?* Thoroughly confused, Darla could only ask, "Girl things, Audrey? What kind of girl things?" ~-~ "Can we go somewhere... a little more private first?" Audrey asked carefully. "I'm not real comfortable with this yet and I'd just as soon not have Aunt Jane or her husband walk in on us." "Her husband?" Darla goggled. *How in heaven's name did she find out about Art?* "Oh, come off it, Darla," Audrey sniffed. "I caught Jane and Art playing kissy-face-tag in the rose garden yesterday and she told me about Art and her reasons for not introducing him to me from the start. "I'm cool with that. I just don't think I want an audience while I talk to you about my secrets." "Okay..." Darla said slowly, while thinking very fast. *I've already told Jane I'm not playing snitch anymore, but if this really is a secret for Audrey, any of the public rooms are out. And Audrey's bedroom is one that Jane had rigged with surveillance cameras and microphones after Mike's suicide attempt. That leaves my room, which isn't a good idea, or somewhere outside.* "How about we go for a walk - perhaps down to the stable?" "Great idea! I'll go see if I can sweet talk Marie out of a thermos of cocoa and something to snack on." "Don't forget something for Garters and Teddi!" Darla yelled after the suddenly gone Audrey. "What the hell am I getting into now?" ~-~ "Good grief," Darla exclaimed as Audrey began laying out the contents of the wicker basket, starting with a picnic blanket, "you said a snack, not a six course meal." "You know Marie as well as I do - hell, you know her better. What did you expect? She said it would let Art have 'a civilized luncheon with his belle wife' if you and I picnicked out here." Then Audrey laughed. "Lord, will you look at this? Fine china and crystal glasses for an afternoon picnic in a horse barn." Then she shook her head in disbelief, or maybe admiration. "Only at this place." *I'm not at all sure that what Art has in mind is particularly civilized, but all I can say is, 'go for it, Dad!'.* "Well, at least it is warm here in the stable, or I would have very uncivilly crashed their little tete-a-tete. OH WOW! Marie's special chicken salad!! She rarely makes that when a student is in the house, and it's my favorite!" Audrey looked up from her work, a quizzical look on her face. "Why not? I know it's bad for the figure, but once in a while it's not a problem." "Aunt Jane," Darla said with a giggle. "She loves it, too, but even she hasn't been able to find a dignified and neat way to eat one of Marie's overstuffed chicken salad sandwiches." "Well, she sent us plenty of napkins so I guess I won't worry about being dignified and just enjoy my sandwich." "Good plan," Darla approved. "HEY, I get the bigger one. She packed them for me!" "Watch it, shorty," Audrey said with a mock growl, before handing over the biggest of the three sandwiches. "That just means I don't have to share the other two." Soon, the two young people were seated on the blanket in front of Garters' stall with their legs drawn demurely beneath their skirts, happily consuming their feast. "So, Audrey," Darla offered as she munched contentedly on an apple, "now that we're both stuffed, what was it you wanted to talk about?" "Boys," the other girl said softly. "Or maybe more correctly, men." *Uh oh,* was Darla's first thought, before she realized that this might be the chance she'd wanted to see if or how Darryl had messed up this morning. "You said you were starting to like, um, Darryl quite a bit. Is that still going okay for you?" she managed with an air of nonchalance she was far from actually feeling. "Yes... no... I guess..." "Well, that's definitive," Darla quipped. "Oh, you," the taller girl said with an embarrassed smile. "Look, you know about my past, right? I just don't know how to deal with...this!" "Define 'this' for me, okay? Take your time." "I've never been, well, attracted to a guy before. I just don't know what to do." "Is he attracted to you?" Darla asked, as much because she figured the question was appropriate as because DARRYL wanted to know if Audrey knew he was. "If he isn't, he shouldn't be kissing me the way he did yesterday," Audrey snapped, and then blushed. "He, ah, caught me by surprise." Audrey twitched as she realized she'd just revealed more than she intended, at least about the depth of her feelings about Darryl. She wasn't sure she wanted to tell anyone about that yet. For that matter, she wasn't sure she even understood it herself. So she shrugged and said, "It's, um, it's just that, ah, he's the first guy who has ever really kissed me. He... really did a number on me." "Did you like it?" Darla prodded deeper "After a good deal of thought," Audrey's eyes suddenly became alive with excitement. "I had to admit to myself that I LOVED it," she confided. "Pretty good one, was it?" Darla asked, grinning conspiratorially. "Like one of those movie close-up kisses - from an old black and white film. My toes actually curled, Darla." *Mine did, too!* "Sounds like you like him and he likes you," the smaller girl observed with a nonchalant shrug. "You're both mature for your age, and nearly at the age of full consent. So what's the problem?" "I'm not holding up my end of things, Darla, and I really don't know how. That's where YOU come in." A niggle of uncertainty tickled at the back of Darla's mind. "Where I come in? I'm not sure I understand." "I don't know what to do. I grew up feeling like I wasn't male or female, neither fish nor fowl, if you can understand that. Almost sexless, really. I don't know how to deal with these feelings, these situations." *Oh NO!* "And you think I do?" "Sure you do. You're a real girl's girl, so I'm pretty sure you know how these guy-girl things work from the girl's side of the equation. Lord knows I don't. I mean, look, let me give you an example of what I mean. This morning? I was going to really turn the tables on Darryl for that Valentino scene he hit me with yesterday. I was really going to lay it on him - just to find out what it is like to be, well, the aggressor in this type of thing. I wanted to bend HIM over backwards - you know, draping him over in my arms, and then kiss him senseless like he did to me. I'm big enough, strong enough to do it, so I figured I'd sauce that gander good." Stalling for time, Darla asked. "So what happened?" "I wimped out," Audrey said with a disgusted sigh. "I got worried that he wouldn't like it, or worse, that he'd think I was doing it to show him what it was like to be overpowered. And... . and... " "And what, Audrey?" "Well, when you think about it, what I was planning to do would pretty much prove that I'm stronger than him. The guys I know from the gym tend to be really sensitive about girls showing them up like that. It's part of the reason I want to compete against them." "You're afraid that he might dump you for showing him up like that?" Audrey nodded. "I don't know much about men, but what I do know is that they don't have a sense of humor where their supposed manhood is concerned." "Knowing Darryl," Darla said carefully, "I don't think he would have gotten angry or anything. He might have laughed." "THAT WOULD HAVE BEEN WORSE!" Audrey yelped, bringing Garters to the door of his stall to see what the noise was all about. *She's fragile,* Darla realized, *particularly where her sexuality is concerned. She assumes that anything that happens less than perfectly is her fault. "I don't think he'd have meant it in a bad way. Darryl is just one of those guys who laughs when he's happy. If he likes you, I guarantee he'd be happy to have you, what did you say? Oh yes, ummm, kiss him senseless." "But I don't know that - didn't know that!" Audrey almost wailed. "Well, short of going out with the two of you," *Which flat out isn't going to happen,* "And interpreting his responses for you, I don't know what good I can do, Audrey." *Particularly, since there is a real problem of conflict of interests here...or is it? She wants me and I want her... No, you can't EVEN think like that, you idiot. There lies nothing but disaster.* "I need a plan," Audrey said firmly. "I need to get over my, um, hesitancy around boys. Just like the plan I made when I decided I was going to compete in the Olympics against men, only this is a different sort of relationship." Darla nodded, trying to portray an air of calmly analytical consideration of Audrey's idea. "Just what did you have in mind?" "I need a Get Laid plan. That should cover any remaining, ah, uncertainties." "You want a WHAT?!" "You heard what I said," Audrey replied, smirking. "A plan," Darla repeated, not quite sure she believed where this was going. "For you to follow, so that you can... 'get laid'. Get laid by... whom?" "Darryl, of course. I don't know the 'what's and how's' of all this romance stuff, so that's where you come in. I figure we can start out small - you know - little things, so that I don't panic or get worried that he won't like it, and so that you can tell me what the likely reactions are and how to interpret them." A ball of anxiety seemed to be growing exponentially inside Darla's gut as she forced herself to stay focused. "Interpret them? I don't understand." "Sure you do," her friend enthused. "Like the laughing. Suppose he laughed? You said right away that it meant he was happy and liked what was going on, right? Well, I probably would have belted him one, or run off to lick my wounds. So, I figure we start building this plan - a little bit at a time - to make sure we account for anything new we've learned along the way, and work our way up to the big time." The ball of tension that had been growing almost exploded. For several long moments, Darla could not speak, could only barely think. *Oh God, she wants me to tell her how to seduce Darryl, but Darryl is me, I mean, I'm Darryl and... Oh GOD!* "You want. . me...to...to..." "Teach me what I need to know to seduce Darryl," Audrey finished, a huge relieved smile on her face. "Whew. Thank goodness I finally managed to get THAT out. I mean, he's really okay for a guy, and I...well, I like him. On top of all that, after that kiss, I don't think he'd run screaming into the night if I jumped his bones. So, I guess I don't mind if I make one or more of his days VERY lucky," she offered with a very salacious smile "So, Teach, what do we do next?" Whatever reaction Audrey had anticipated to her request, the look of shock and near-horror on Darla's face was not it. "I can't handle this," the boy-girl gritted out in a voice that was neither Darla nor Darryl, but an agonized mix of both. "I just can't do this. I... I," without finishing, Darla jumped to her feet and began to leave. Surprised and suddenly worried at her friends unexpected distress, Audrey reached out and caught Darla by her arm. "Hey, wait a minute. What's the matter? What..." Furiously, and with surprising strength, Darla shook Audrey's hand from her arm. "No, please, I need to be alone for a... a ohhh god, I... have to leave." Audrey looked on in open-mouthed disbelief as Darla practically raced out of the barn, her skirts forgotten and flapping immodestly about her flashing legs. "Goodness, what's happened to her?" she asked herself as she watched her friend disappear up the trail. *I should follow her. ...* Audrey mused. *Well, she did say she needed to be alone... . Okay, so I'll just pick up the picnic leftovers and take the basket back to Marie before I go check on Darla. Besides, she'd probably have a fit if I left her precious china and crystal laying about on the floor of the stable.* Chapter 5: Programmatic Breakdown "Ma-REEE-EEE?" Audrey called as she walked through the kitchen door, the neatly repacked picnic basket hanging from her arm. "Here, now," Marie scolded as she bustled back to where the frowning girl stopped. "There's no need to shout like that. My hearing is quite good, thank-you-very-much" Then she got a better look at the very distracted young woman's face. "What's wrong, Audrey?" Marie asked in a much gentler voice. "Marie...have you seen Darla?" Audrey asked, looking around as if to see if her friend might be at hand. "In the last few minutes, I mean?" "Well, no, but why? Here, let me take that basket." The older woman took the picnic basket and set it beside her sink. "Now, what is all this about?" she asked again. "Darla and I were talking about... well, things, and suddenly, she was really upset," she said, before adding reflectively. "I have never seen her react that way before." *Why do I think 'things' is more correctly spelled 'boys', perhaps even one specific boy?* "What happened?" Marie asked again, this time more firmly. "She turned and ran," Audrey shrugged, her confusion plain on her face, "after telling me she needed to be alone. I... I let her go, but the longer I've thought about it, the more I'm worried that letting her go off alone in that kind of mood might not have been the right decision." *That doesn't sound like Darla. Whatever could have made her react like that?* "Any idea what set her off?" "I'm not really sure, but...Marie? I was going to clean up the stuff in the basket, but now, would you mind taking care of these things? I really feel like I should go find Darla." Marie watched as the girl slipped away into the public rooms of the main house. "Lord, I hope this is nothing serious," she murmured to herself. "Audrey seemed more pensive than really worried." At the same time her mind could not think of anything that was 'nothing serious' that would set off her rock-solid nephew/niece. "On the other hand, maybe I had better go find Jane." ~-~ Audrey concluded that the most likely place to find Darla would be with Jane Thompson. Besides, if she wasn't there, Jane should be told that her niece was so upset. Audrey had no experience with someone that apparently upset, and felt that the erring on the side of caution was the smarter course of action. As it turned out, she could hear the sound of voices as she approached Jane's downstairs office. That was odd, for as Audrey had learned over the course of her months in Season's House, Jane's office was as close to soundproofed as made no real difference. The cause also became obvious as she came up to the office door - it wasn't closed, although she couldn't see in through the bare crack. Audrey hesitated at opening the door and concluded that, whatever was wrong, Jane Thompson was better able to handle it than Audrey herself. She was about to leave, when some imp had her stay to listen. "You're sure I can't talk you out of this?" Jane's voice asked in that calm, rational and almost toneless voice Audrey had come to know and respect. Ms. Thompson was trying to make one of those uncomfortable points of hers. "No," was the adamant response from a still-upset Darla. *Her voice is really husky-sounding. I wish I knew what I did to upset her so. Maybe if I listen just a bit, I will get a clue so that I don't do it again.* "This whole thing has gone too far, and... and I just can't help her any more, not now! I can't do what you ask and I can't do what she asks. It's time, Mom." *MOM?!?!?* Audrey's mind reeled at that revelation. Now, NOTHING would move her from her station. "I'm not sure I agree, dear. You're very upset right now. That doesn't make this a good time for such a major decision - especially when it affects more than just you." "This time you don't have to agree and you don't get a say," Darla's voice was a barely audible hiss. "I have to do what I have to do, or lose everything - including my self respect." "Need I remind you that she's MY student?" "No, but that's why I am telling you." "Are you doing this because it's right for her, or because it's right for you?" A long silence followed Jane's question. Finally, a gusty sigh broke the seeming impasse and Darla spoke again. "I don't know, Mom, and that is the whole truth. Both of us, maybe. Or maybe neither of us. But going on as we are is not right either. Not for either of us. I *am* sure of that. Audrey deserves better than this." At that, Audrey straightened and strode into the office. "I quite agree, and since I seem to be the topic of discussion," she said firmly, "I think I have the right to know precisely what you two are talking about." ~-~ Darla closed her eyes against what was to come, but nodded. For her part, Jane looked to be readying an argument, but that died aborning as her child held up one finely manicured hand. "Could we be alone, Aunt Jane? Please?" Jane's face took on a mutinous glare that almost made Darla smile, having seen its like often in the mirror. "Please. It really is time. She deserves that." Still uncertain, Jane glanced back and forth between the two beautifully dressed young people. Finally she shrugged. Turning to Darla, she bent down and kissed her child on the cheek. "I will be in my study if you need me." Darla gave her a shaky smile and nodded, whereupon Jane turned a sterner eye on her pupil. "You will do everyone a very great favor - yourself included, Audrey - if you listen to what Darla has to say with a fair and open mind. I'll remind you that you came here under some duress, forced by the very serious issues you were facing. It was my judgment at the time that equally serious methods were required to address those issues. Darla consented to assist me, at my request and despite significant misgivings on her part. None of this was her idea - it was mine. She merely deferred to my greater experience in such matters." Then Jane slipped from the room, carefully closing the door behind her - only then wishing she'd remembered to activate the microphone hidden in her desk-set. "Okay, Darla," Audrey said coming directly to the point. "Just what the hell is going on here!?!" ~-~ Darla turned away from Audrey, and went to stand in front of the windows that overlooked Jane's beloved English garden. Try as she might, the words she needed eluded her. "You know, in all my time here at Seasons House, and in all the talks I have had with Jane's students, nothing like this has ever happened. I don't know what to say to you, Audrey." "I'd say the place to start is with Jane's parting shot," Audrey replied. "Since that seems to be pretty close to the beginning. What did she mean by that crack about 'Serious methods'?" Darla nodded, and began to nervously rub her crossed forearms with her hands. "Do you remember what you were like when you first arrived? What Rocky was like?" she asked in a soft, oddly husky voice. Frowning, Audrey sat down in one of the conversation setting chairs. "Yeah. So? I wasn't much of a lady, then, okay? I know that, and if this is all about whether I intend to stay, ah, feminine, or whether I like being a woman now, the answer is yes. Does that solve this great revelation Jane was trying to talk you out of giving me." "That's part of it, but only a small part of it. If you'll recall, it wasn't just that Rocky wasn't very feminine - didn't WANT to be feminine. It's more about the way Rocky thought about men." "That person, Rocky, didn't think much of men, I mean, about men very much." Despite the tension coiling in her guts, Darla smiled. "You were right the first time. That Rocky was more likely to attack a man than get to know him." "I was not THAT bad. I only retaliated when..." Darla turned and fixed a challenging look on the tall girl, stopping her in mid- sentence. "All right, already. I agree, and that I SOMEtimes would act decisively rather than wait and have to react. So, maybe I wasn't very nice then. What's all that got to do with you and now?" "Well, Jane decided that you would be able to, um, settle in better if there were no men in the household." Rolling her eyes, Audrey grimaced. "Right, and so Art left, leaving poor Aunt Jane all alone. Oh, except for you and Marie of course." Darla gripped her crossed arms tightly, trying to force them to stop shaking. The moment she had been dreading was upon them both. "Um, it's not quite that simple." A bark of laughter answered Darla. "For damn sure it's not simple if you won't spit it out. Damn it, Darla, I thought you were going to come clean with me." "Ah, yes, well, it was also, um, decided that you needed a companion while you were working through your issues." "And that's where you come in." "Yes. But, you see, there was more to that 'solution' than you were told." Throwing her arms up in frustration, Audrey stood and moved to face Darla. "God, I hate pulling teeth. Get to the damn point!" "The only young person in the household who could be your companion was not, um, compatible with your first need." "So, what? You're a visitor? An older student of Jane's? But I heard you call Jane, 'Mom'." "Yeah, well, that part is right. I'm her adopted... child." "And? What's the rest of it? I don't have any problem with adopted children so that's no reason to get all strange on me." "Audrey... God this is hard... I'm not her adopted daughter." Darryl replied, consciously changed his voice, and letting his posture sag a bit, thus losing the prim perfection Darla always displayed. The combination, along with the stress Audrey realized was all too real for any continuing distraction, finally got through to the athletic girl. She knew what Darla was about to say before the words even came. "I'm her adopted son." he concluded quietly. For several heartbeats, Audrey was bereft of speech. all she could do was remember the times she had been with this... this person, confided in her... HIM, trusted her friend, only to discover that she had not friend. Not here. "Son?" she spat out when her voice returned, lashing out with all the fury, confusion and hurt she was now feeling. "Oh, God, you... we... in the dressing room, and... in my bedroom... spying on me, laughing at me. You... you... BASTARD! You... SON of a BITCH!" Darryl felt the tears burn, but had no strength to staunch their flow. "Dear Audrey, that's not the worst of it." "Don't you DARE call me dear!" she raged at her betrayer. Nodding, Darryl turned his face away so he did not have to face her accusations. "The worst of it is... who I really am." "Who, Jack the Ripper? What could possibly be worse than bei