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Impractical Magic Part 1: Halloween has always been my favorite time of year. At first it was because of the costumes and candy and the fun of pretending to be someone else. Not that I ever really wanted to be anyone other than who I am... it's just fun to pretend sometimes. I kept dressing up on Halloween long after all my friends had stopped. Every year I'd find some new excuse to buy a costume. At first, it was taking my younger sister and her friends out trick-or-treating, but when she got old enough to abandon the practice herself, I was forced to find other excuses, usually by trying to get invited to one of the parties on campus. I really enjoyed not having to be myself that one night a year; it was like a vacation from my usual boring life into a world of magic and mystery, where anything could happen. There's a sense of adventure in the air then; it's always felt that way to me. But more than that, there's a sense of... ...well, magic... on Halloween that's always stuck with me, even as an adult. I've always believed in magic. Not the blatant fireballs & lightning bolt stuff from movies and D&D games, but the subtle kind. The kind that sneaks up on you like a slow sunrise. I even profess to have "cast" real-life magic before... though people usually don't believe me when I say so, or they write it off as coincidence. The kind of magic I make is easy to do that with, or at least it always was. For instance: I've called thunderstorms even in the desert, made streetlights black out just by thinking about it, given my natural luck a healthy boost when I needed it, and warded off things that I didn't want to happen both to me and to my friends. It wasn't a matter of casting incantations or anything (though I have studied some shamanism), it was just a matter of being in the right mindset and, well, just making it happen. This is what happened the last time I tried anything like that... It was Halloween morning. My friend Dave and I had gone out early looking for last-minute items to finish off our costumes. There was a party that night which our friend Felicity had invited us to. Felicity was one of my oldest and dearest friends next to Dave, and the three of us had all known each other since high school. Felicity and I had come close to becoming romantically involved once... but, that sort of fizzled out before it really began. I think we were both too afraid of risking the friendship if things went bad romantically. Dave was going exotic. He had a home-made costume loosely based off something he had seen in a Poison Elves comic book. It was a modern-day gothic-punk Elven warrior -- blue jeans, Renaissance-style peasant's tunic, leather jacket with arcane-looking markings, fake armor piercings worked into the jacket, and ornate hand-crafted burgundy leather boots made in the old style that lace up the front. Add a sword and a fake pair of Elven ears, and the effect was really nice. Compared to Dave, I was actually feeling a little insecure about my costume. I had been short on cash this year and hadn't really had a lot of time to work on anything spectacular, so I decided to go as kind of a mix-matched warlock. I had a really nice black silk tunic that I had bought at the Ren-fest a few years ago, the old "poet's style" with the lacings at the neckline and the pleated sleeves that poof out. I added some black leather biker pants, a pair of black low-cut leather boots, and a brownish-red woolen cloak. I had all the stuff already, so it didn't really cost me anything, but I was really looking for something to set it off. I had a lot of necklaces and such already, most of it costume jewelry from previous years or from when I'd played in a few live-action role-playing games and wanted to dress up in- character. None of what I already had really sparked any interest in me for this costume, though, and I didn't want to wear a necklace I'd used in a previous costume. I was already feeling bad enough that I hadn't put as much work into my costume as Dave had. Problem is, nothing at the stores caught my eye either. We'd gone all over town the previous day, and Dave had found a great pewter broach of a dragon to pin to his jacket... but I still hadn't found anything I really liked. I'd been in kind of a funk recently anyway. Nothing specific, just feeling tired of the usual routine and a little depressed that my college course load had so much of my time tied up, and... ...well, maybe a little lonely too. Part of me still wished that Felicity and I had taken the chance back when we both seemed interested in giving dating a try. So much time had passed now, though, that I was afraid to bring it back up with her. It seemed that more and more lately, my life was turning out to be a series of missed opportunities, for one reason or another. I wished something would happen to change that; that I could find some... ...spark... to make my life a little less routine. So against all odds I was awake in the early pre-noon hours, showered and shaved by ten and off with Dave to my last hope -- the local flea market. They had a large glass display case by the front of the store filled with costume jewelry and an odd, eclectic assortment of small trinkets ranging from steel figurines made in the '50's to stylized cigarette lighters and antique glassware. Most of the costume jewelry was just plain gaudy; stuff my dead Aunt Ida wouldn't wear to a disco-brothel in Vegas. (And she had pink hair and a poodle whose hair had been dyed to match hers) But there was one piece that really interested me, and my eye kept coming back to it. It was a leather necklace with Celtic knotwork cast in pewter or dull grey silver --I couldn't tell which-- in the shape of heart; with a dark blue stone in the center that caught the light the way murky water does at night. The knotwork was left loose enough that the heart and stone looked like they had been woven together. It was like I felt drawn to it, somehow. I knew I had to have it. I paid the cashier, and we left; Dave dropping me back off at my apartment. I still had most of the day before I had to get ready for the party. I slipped my shoes off and sat down on the couch to watch a little television. The necklace kept creeping into my thoughts, though. I took it out of the box and looked at it, holding it up to the light. The dark blue stone seemed to draw the light into itself giving a dull, glassy luster. I slipped it on; it rested perfectly center in the small of my chest about the size and weight of a nickel. I couldn't help it; I had to see what it looked like with my costume. I went into the bedroom and took off my jeans and t-shirt, replacing them with the silk poet's shirt and leather pants, leaving the cloak off. Then I put the necklace back on and looked at the effect in the mirror. I had to admit it looked pretty good; the necklace was just what the costume had needed. It was a nice look, especially with my long dark hair hanging loose past my shoulders. I took the costume off but decided to leave the necklace on. Slipping the shirt off, the necklace felt cold against my bare chest. I took the tight leather pants off and put on a pair of loose-fitting shorts then walked into the kitchen shirtless. I liked the way the necklace dangled when I walked; it had a good weight to it. Crossing the kitchen, I opened the cabinet and pulled out a glass, lost hold, and dropped it by accident. It shattered on the tile floor. At least it was empty. I bent down and started picking up the pieces of broken glass and cursed softly as I cut my finger. My hand rushed to my mouth, and I held it there, sucking on the blood for a moment before going to the sink and running it under some cold water until the bleeding stopped. After dulling the pain a bit under the icy water, I held my hand out and looked at the injury. Not bad, just a small cut. I grabbed a dustpan and a paper plate this time, then bent back down to sweep up the broken glass, using the paper plate to sweep the glass into the dustpan. It would do in place of a broom. Bent over like that, a few strands of hair got tangled in the bands of the necklace. Without thinking much about it, I swept the hair back over my shoulder and pulled the necklace forward. I felt a cold, electric shock go through my whole system the moment the necklace touched the cut on my finger. It was like a static charge had built up and suddenly swept across me. I barely had time to wonder what was going on before I blacked out. ??? In my dream, I was standing on the beach in Florence that my parents used to take my sister and I to when we were kids. It was late fall, and the Oregon rains had trailed off for a few hours, but dark heavy clouds stretched out across the horizon and hung low over the ocean as they slowly drifted toward shore under the fierce coastal winds. A woman stood out on the rocks just up from where the waves were breaking, staring out at the sea. She was dressed in a flowing white nightgown that fluttered in the wind. Her long dark hair blew in the wind untamed, and tangles of it whipped wildly in every direction. I heard her speak, though she never turned to face me, and the crashing waves roared like thunder in my ears as they smashed against the rocks. "Hello, Alex," she greeted me, still facing away. "I knew you'd come." "I felt you calling to me," I said. "Yes. Tonight is a very special night, Alex. Samhain; a time of rebirth and renewal. Did you bring the gift I gave you?" she asked. "Yes," I said and touched the necklace I wore. The blue gemstone woven into the heart-shaped knotwork glowed brightly as I did so. The dark clouds churned overhead; their center was the same deep, fathomless dark blue as the gemstone. "What is it you want of me?" I asked. "I want us to be together," she said and turned to face me. Her hair whipped up in the wind and obscured her face for a moment, then fell back down to her shoulders. She had my face. "Together as one," she said, "Always." Then, in a roar of thunder the clouds shuddered, and the storm overtook us. ??? I woke up slowly, like crawling through a long tunnel. My head was aching, and my whole body was numb. Slowly, the pain and numbness receded and my mind worked its way back to consciousness. My thoughts were cloudy. Vague images from some half-remembered dream floated just on the outer edges of my mind's grasp. I remembered dreaming but couldn't remember what about. I had a vague memory of a woman with dark hair, but her features were out of focus now that I was awake again. I wondered what the hell had happened... that wasn't like me. I'd never passed out before. Maybe the cut had bled more than I thought. Then I noticed the time on the kitchen clock. I'd lost nearly five hours! The whole concept was dumbfounding; I couldn't believe I'd lost that much time. Feeling fine now that I was awake again, I slapped a band-aid on the cut, threw the rest of the broken glass in the trash, and rushed into the bathroom to get ready for the party. I undressed and got in the shower, tossing the socks, shorts, and underwear I'd been wearing into a pile on the floor. I forgot I even had the necklace on until I felt the warm water running around it as the shower cascaded my chest. The leather chord it was on seemed strong enough to hold even wet, so I just left it on and began washing my hair. My hair felt silkier than usual and more full-bodied for some reason. I chalked it up to the new shampoo I'd been using. Finishing in the shower, I dried off and bounded down the hall into the bedroom to change into my costume. I was feeling really good all of a sudden. The shower had left me feeling pretty refreshed, and I was looking forward to the party. Whatever had caused the fainting spell in the kitchen earlier seemed to have worn off. I put I put on a fresh pair of underwear and an almost-fresh pair of socks that I'd only worn once that week, then pulled the leather pants on, leaving them unfastened so I'd be able to tuck the shirt in. Then I put the black silk poet's shirt on, pulling my hair out from under the back of the shirt so it would hang down on my shoulders, then tucked the shirt into the pants so that it hung loosely and buttoned the pants up. The pants were a little bit longer than I remembered them being now that I had them fastened. I put the cloak on and fastened it loosely with a Celtic knotwork broach so that it hung off my right shoulder just a bit like some of the old tartans used to. Finally, I put my shoes on, brushed my long hair out, and slid the necklace up from inside my shirt so that it was visible. Running a bit late, I grabbed my wallet and keys and raced outside to my car, cloak breezing behind me like Batman in a hurry. The party was already going when I arrived, and both Felicity and Dave were already there. Dave had spiked his short blonde hair and added glitter to his hair and face to go with the outfit. That and his naturally thin figure actually made him a pretty convincing elf. Felicity was wearing a full-length opal gown with glittery gemstones sewn into it. It hung off the shoulders, and where it tapered at the bottom it started to turn into a patchwork of several other types of material as if the seamstress had started one dress then got sidetracked and started sewing other patterns midway. She wore one clear slipper and one sneaker. Felicity had told me about her idea for a Cinderella costume, but I hadn't seen it until now. The idea came across really well; she'd done a good job with the dress. It was like looking at Cinderella stuck in mid-transformation. "About time you showed up, Alex!" Felicity teased as she hugged me. "Yeah, we were about to send out the marines," Dave joked. "Sorry," I said, "I overslept. Boy, Felicity, that dress came out great. You look wonderful." "Thanks, Alex. I like your costume, too... great necklace; where'd you get it?" Felicity replied. "Flea Market. Dave and I went this morning," I told her. "Yeah, they had a lot of neat stuff there," Dave added, "though some of it was way overpriced." "It looks really good with your costume," Felicity said. "Thanks." Dave gave me a strange look and said, "Did you die your hair, Alex? It looks lighter." "No..." I answered a little confused, "Maybe it's just the lighting in here or something." "Must be," he said. The party went pretty well until nearly midnight; Felicity got second place in the costume contest, and Dave got honorable mention. I was starting to come down off my earlier high just a little though. The leather biker pants were constricting me something fierce; like they were a size too small in the hips all of a sudden. And even though my shirt was hanging really loose and was made of silk, it was irritating my skin. My chest itched horribly, and I kept fidgeting all night unable to fully get comfortable in the irritating clothes. Twice Felicity and Dave asked me if I was feeling well, saying I looked pale. I felt hot all over, and my head was swimming like I'd gone on a bender the day before. It felt like I was on the verge of passing out again. I told Dave and Felicity about my earlier fainting spell, then decided to go home early. "I think it's time I leave," I said, "I think I may be coming down with something." "Do you want one of us to drive you home?" Dave asked. "No, I think I can manage," I said, "After all, it's not far." Felicity walked me out to my car and promised to check on me the next day to see how I felt. I didn't have any classes scheduled that day, so I promised her I'd try to get some rest. I thanked her and started to get into my car when she did something I hadn't expected... she leaned in close and gave me a hug like she usually did, but something about it this time felt... ...I don't know... ...just different. Like there maybe was something more to it than usual. Then she kissed me on the cheek and told me to be careful driving home. It was midnight on Halloween night, and the girl I might have feelings for had just kissed me in a way that made me wonder again if we could be more than just friends, so I just stood there in the moonlight for minute, feeling giddy and alive despite the onset of sickness that had driven me away from the party and into the cool night air. The Crescent moon shone above me, occasionally being obscured by gray wisps of fast moving clouds. The breeze picked up, touseling my long hair playfully as I watched Felicity walk back to the party. For a single moment, that was my whole world. Silence, moonlight, and wind. I closed my eyes, and envisioned the moon free of its obscurement, shining brightly. I opened them, and watched the last wisps of clouds trail away from the moon's face as they parted. My breaths were coming in slower and slower rhythm, stretching time out in the pauses between them. Breathe in, and the wind picks up just a bit; the long strands of my hair floating outward on its invisible touch. Wait half a moment. Breathe out, and the breeze pulls away, settling everything back into place. I focused my thoughts and sent them out into the darkness, thinking long and hard about what exactly I wanted in that moment; that stolen magik moment outside of time when I had somehow connected with whatever it was that moved clouds with a thought and caused the moon to glow brighter. The heart-shaped necklace felt warm in the center of my chest, and I felt as though the moon's mystery was somehow being reflected into the dark blue gem at the necklace's center, and through it into me. Tiny jolts of electricity ran along my spine as the streetlights flickered, filling me with energy. If this was my moment, I wanted to use it to filter everything else out of my life so that I could carry some tiny portion of this feeling around with me forever. I didn't want to wake up tomorrow and forget what it felt like to touch moonlight; I didn't want this magik to get lost in my everyday life. I wanted to be different. I got into the car, dazed and giddy from Felicity's sudden show of affection and my subsequent trance; head and body once again reminding me that it was still aching, and without thinking about it adjusted the seat forward a couple of inches from where I'd had it before so that my feet could reach the peddles. I don't even remember the drive home; I was on autopilot the whole way. I unlocked the door to my apartment and went inside mechanically, barely registering my own actions. I got undressed on the way to the bedroom, leaving my clothes in a trail behind me as I went, and laid down to sleep in my boxer shorts and socks, not even thinking to take the necklace off. I was out like a light before my head even reached the pillow, sleeping soundlessly. Morning hit me like a bullet. I sat bolt upright, instantly wide awake and terrified. Of what, I don't know. Something was very, very wrong... There was movement somewhere in one of the outer rooms of my apartment. Someone was in my apartment! The hackles on the back of my neck rose, and I sat there on the side of the bed in darkness straining to hear anything more... I heard my breath catch in my throat; an odd- sounding gasp escaped my lips. There was the movement again; someone was definitely in the apartment with me. My heart was pounding in my chest, and I felt an odd and very alien sensation as my chest heaved up and down in panic... like someone had attached a small set of weights there where they shouldn't have been; they moved up and down as I breathed. I moved my hands to my chest in the darkness and against all logic felt the weight and softness of female breasts... BREASTS?!?... "My God...," I muttered and stopped abruptly, not recognizing the soft contralto as my own voice... What the hell was going on...? And that's when the bedroom light flashed on, and Felicity stood in the bedroom doorway dumbfounded. "Alex,...?!? Is that you?" she asked in shock, "Jesus, what's happened to you?" I looked over at her standing in the doorway of my bedroom, gripping the door frame like her legs might give out on her at any minute. She looked pretty shocked. I guess it must be tough walking in on your best friend when he's in the middle of turning into a girl... guess asking her out on a date was out of the question now... That's good, Alex, make jokes... then maybe this won't be real, and you won't be... "Oh, god; I think I'm gonna be sick." I made a mad dash for the bathroom, nearly knocking Felicity over as I ran past her... some host I am... I sat there on the cold tile heaving into the toilet for what seemed like forever, hair pulled back with one dainty little hand; the other gripped around the seat holding on for dear life. Those damned alien unwanted breasts in the way the whole time. My bare, hairless legs freezing on the cold tile; boxer shorts draped around my waist like a tent... I don't even want to think about what kind of surprises were waiting down there... Felicity plodded softly to the opened bathroom door and stood there for a minute just watching. I couldn't bring myself to look up at her; not in the state I was in. Without saying a word, she wet a washcloth with warm water and began helping me clean myself off. "It really is you, isn't it?" she asked, voice filled with wonder. I just shook my head yes, I couldn't seem to find my voice. And before I knew it, my whole body had started shaking. I drew my legs up to my chest and wrapped my arms around myself to try and stop it, but sitting there like that just reminded me of how alien everything felt. I felt tears running down my cheeks like hot coals. I hadn't cried like that ever, but I couldn't help it. Felicity put her arms around me and held me until I finished. Then, she helped me to my feet and into the kitchen where she sat me down at the table while she put on a pot of coffee. After a few minutes, she poured me a cup then sat down opposite me with a cup of her own. Ever have one of those days where you wake up and everything feels out of place? Like your whole world's gone topsy- turvy overnight? Well, you don't know the half of it... at least, not until you wake up in someone else's body, anyway. But I guess that's not entirely accurate. I was still pretty-much myself... same eyes; same hair; same quirky old me... but rearranged in a totally new package. And a very female package, at that. Quite a shock considering I'd gone to bed male the night before. "So," she joked, "aside from this, what's new?" That actually brought a smile to this girlish new face of mine. The initial shock was starting to wear off now. "Oh, this pretty much tops my list of new and unusual things." I replied. "No other real shockers today." I scrunched my forehead together and frowned. "I don't think. I hope not. Man, this is weird..." I allowed my voice to trail off, marveling at how different it sounded; all cotton candy and satin. "Yeah." Felicity agreed then was silent for a minute. "Do you have any idea how it happened?" "Not a clue. I woke up just before you walked in on me. This is crazy, isn't is? People don't just spontaneously change gender over night." "Something has to have caused it," Felicity said, "There has to be some kind of explanation." I thought back to everything I'd done the previous day... everything I'd eaten or drank, everywhere I'd gone, everything I'd talked about... none of it seemed very different from my normal routine, and none of it certainly seemed likely to be the cause of such a drastic and sudden transformation. "I did pass out for a little while yesterday after cutting my finger on a piece of broken glass. I remember thinking it was strange and feeling really drained afterwards, but I don't see how that could have caused something like this." I motioned my hand to indicate my new cleavage. It suddenly dawned on me that I was still pretty much naked sitting there in only my boxer shorts. As a guy, I was used to going topless, and in my shock earlier it hadn't occurred to me to put a shirt on. The Celtic heart necklace I'd bought yesterday rested snugly between my new breasts. I'd forgotten I still had it on. "Wait a minute...! The necklace! Yesterday, when I passed out, it was right after I touched the necklace with the finger I'd cut." A look of panic crept across my face, "You think this could be some kind of weird infection or something?" Felicity frowned in confusion. "I don't think any infection I know of could work this quick on such a large scale... and I definitely don't think any kind of flu could cause this kind of, um, swelling?" She indicated my naked chests. "There has to be something more to it; probably something way outside usual medicine. I mean, you can't just go to the doctor and get a shot for an overnight case of girlness." I frowned, and looked down at myself, and for a moment wondered what the expression looked like on my new girlish face; probably all pouty. "It would be nice to hope that it could be like a 2 day bug, though. I sure don't want to have to be stuck like this." "Okay, so doctors are out," Felicity said, "Maybe there's someone else we could go to, though. Someone who specializes in unusual stuff like this." "What, like a witch doctor?" I asked. "Something like that. My aunt Lauren has a small new age shop downtown. She mostly tells fortunes and sells cheap love potions - stuff like that - , but she has a real gift. I've seen her do some pretty unexplainable things. She may be able to help. If nothing else, maybe she'll be able to tell us if there's some sort of spell or something on the necklace." "It's worth a shot," I agreed. "There's something I want to try first, though." Felicity said, "Try taking the necklace off to see if that does anything." I took the Celtic heart in my hand, still not used to seeing how slender my hands were now, and slowly pulled the necklace's leather chord up over my head. My breath caught as I did so, and I closed my eyes in silent prayer. And then the necklace was off, and I was still unchanged. Still a girl, despite having twenty-two years of life experience that said otherwise. "No dice, I guess." I muttered regretfully. "I guess it was kind of a long shot," Felicity said, "But, hey, if it's a spell of some sort, I'm sure my aunt will recognize it. C'mon, the sooner we get going; the sooner we can ungirl you." I liked the sound of that. While Felicity phoned her aunt to tell her we coming, I went back into the bedroom to try and find some clothes that would still fit. Walking down the hall was a different sensation; my whole center of gravity had changed. My strides were shorter, and I couldn't help but notice the way my hips seemed to swish back and forth. And, yes, my new breasts bounced like they had a life of their own, especially topless like I was now. I was beginning to see why women wore bras, though I hoped I wouldn't be sticking around for the experience of wearing one. Finding something that fit proved to be more difficult than I had thought. All my jeans were way too snug at the hips and too loose at the waist, and some of my t-shirts looked like they'd been painted on. Even my shoes were too big. I finally settled on an old pair of sweat pants that I used to wear to the gym (though I had to roll the pant legs up at the bottom) and the silk poet's shirt that I had worn to the party the night before. The black silk felt nice against the soft skin of my breasts, but the thin material made me feel horribly exposed even though the shirt was baggy enough that my breasts didn't stand out too much. I pulled on an old pair of beach sandals and looked at myself in the closet mirror. Not exactly a fashion statement, but with a little luck I wouldn't have to get too used to making this feminine body of mine look good. Felicity drove us over to her aunt's shop, mostly because we didn't want to take the risk of getting pulled over in my car. I didn't want to have to explain to a cop why the photo on my driver's license didn't match the way I looked now. I sat there in the passenger's seat the whole way, seat belt strapped uncomfortably across my chest. I folded my arms across my new boobs, acutely aware of how far they jutted out, and stared silently out the window trying to make some sort of sense of all this. The strangest part was that I didn't feel all that different. I mean, odd as it was suddenly waking up as a girl, I was still basically me. Yes, it felt weird... but it didn't feel... foreign. This was still the body I'd grown up with. It was just changed in certain places. This is the body I would have had if I had been born a girl. Finally, we arrived. The shop was set into an old brownstone downtown, the kind built side-by-side. There was a big picture window in the front with a display on the inside that showed a giant paper moon suspended in a nighttime sky littered with gossamer-cray paper stars trailing silver and blue tensile. In the bottom corner of the window, a sign read "Midnight Blue Mystic Emporium". Felicity's aunt was waiting for us just inside. She locked the door behind us and put a sign up that said, "Having an Out of Body Experience. Be Right Back." I smiled at that, thinking how much it really applied. Aunt Lauren hugged Felicity and ruffled her hair playfully, "Hello, my little beansprout," she teased Felicity, "What is it that's gotten you so fired up this time?" "Aunt Lauren," Felicity said, "you remember me telling you about my friend Alex, right? Well, he's got a big problem, and he needs your help." "Yes, I remember you telling me about him. He was that nice boy you wanted to go out with, yes? Well, where is he and what sort of problem does he have?" Aunt Lauren reached out to me to shake hands as she continued, "But, first, don't be rude, Felicity, dear; introduce me to your new friend." "Aunt Lauren," Felicity said, "this is Alex. Alex the boy I told you about. When he woke up this morning..." "He was a girl," Aunt Lauren finished. "Yes," I added, suddenly hopeful, "and I think maybe it was this necklace that did it." I showed her the necklace. "Is there anything you can do?" She examined the necklace for a few moments, then closed her eyes and rubbed it between her fingers turning it over and over like a worry stone. "There is powerful magic here," she said, "very old and very powerful. I have not felt anything like it in a very long time. What is more, I recognize the source of this magic. You are indeed under a spell, Alex; one conjured by my old friend and mentor, the sorceress Salome Adora. I'd recognize her work anywhere. Where did you get this, child?" "At the flea market. It was on sale." I scrunched my brow in frustration, pleading, "Can you break the spell?" "Alas, no child, I'm afraid not. Salome has always been a better conjurer than I am. Her craftings are always very intricate. I doubt that anyone but her could undo this." "Oh." I felt the pit of my stomach churning. "Well, is there any way you can contact her?" "Yes, there are ways..." Aunt Lauren began, "but even as good a conjurer as Salome was would be hard-pressed to do an incantation from beyond the grave." She frowned, "I'm afraid she died some time ago; probably before you were even born." My heart sank. That was it, then... I couldn't believe it. I felt faint all of a sudden. And then there was a sudden falling sensation, and before I knew it, I'd been enveloped in darkness. A few minutes later, I was coming back around. I could hear Felicity and her aunt talking as though through a tunnel. The darkness started to give way to hazy splotches of color that slowly coalesced into images. "You'll be alright, child, you've had a mild fainting spell. Don't try to get up too quickly." Dear God, I thought to myself, was this what I had to look forward to... fainting like some damsel in distress at the drop of a hat? "I'm doomed," I moaned. "Nonsense, dear," Aunt Lauren chided me, "You're just changed is all. It could have been much worse, you know. Lucky it was Salome who cast the enchantment and not some sex-starved old wizard. Who knows how you could have ended up then, hmm?" "But I don't want to be a girl!" I whined, "Why would anyone do this to someone, anyway?!?" Felicity gave me a sympathetic glance. "Actually, that's a good question, Alex." Aunt Lauren said, "The Salome I knew wouldn't have done something like this to someone against their will. She was always very interested in helping others as best she could. I can't believe she'd have left an enchantment like this just laying around for anyone to find. There must be more to it than this; more of the enchantment that's yet to make itself known." "What? You mean I could be changed further?" I felt my soft contralto voice rise even higher in pitch with panic. "Yes, it's possible... but more likely the spell's already been cast and the other aspects of it simply aren't visual ones. I think you've changed as much physically as you're going to for now." She ushered us into the back room of the shop as she continued. "If you'll permit me, I may have a way of deciphering the rest of the enchantment. It will require me to put you into a short trance so I can study the energies at work within you." "Anything." I said, "If I wake up with any more surprises like this one, I'll go crazy." "Lie down on the couch over there, then, child. Felicity, dear, hand Alex that crystal on the second shelf; the one next to the chalice, will you? Alex, dear, just lie back and relax. This will be over before you know it." I lay back on the couch holding the crystal Felicity had handed me and closed my eyes. Aunt Lauren sat softly next to me, gripping her hand on top of mine and began whispering something I couldn't quite hear. It felt like I was drifting off on a soft breeze. My whole body seemed light and airy. There was a heat coming from the crystal and a sort of current, though I couldn't tell if it was flowing into Lauren or me. Trickles of electric current seemed to rush all over me. It was invigorating; like standing in a meteor shower or riding the tail of a comet or... And then I was awake. Lauren stood in the corner of the room washing her hands over a small sink. Felicity was sponging my forehead with a damp dishrag. She seemed troubled. "What is it?" I asked. "I was right." Lauren said, "There was much more to the enchantment than is readily visible. It's quite possibly the most complex charm that I've ever seen. I cannot reverse it." "But what else is there? What else did the spell do to me?" "The necklace was more than just a simple spell repository." Lauren explained. "I should have seen that from its form... stone bound into the knotwork of the heart... the necklace was a housing for what remained of Salome's essence; her soul; the heart of her magik. I say was because that essence now resides in you, Alex. The necklace was Salome's last gift to the world... a promise that a part of her magik would live on in someone worthy of using it. That someone is you, Alex. You are Salome's chosen successor; it was no whim of fate that you found the necklace. You were drawn to it so you could receive its gift. You're very lucky, child." I was speechless. How do you respond to something like that? "But that still doesn't explain why he was turned into a girl," Felicity said. "Of course it does." Lauren said, "Salome's magik, like all conjurer's magik, was fueled by the strength of her soul -- her female soul --; of which she has given a part to Alex. In order for Alex to make any practical use of the magik Salome has given him, he had to have some way of tapping into the female energies that fuel it. Thus the transformation." "Great," I muttered, "my first day as a girl, and already everyone's calling me a witch." Lauren frowned slightly, "There are far worse things to be called, my dear." I felt my face redden, and looked to the floor guiltily, casting a quick glance at Felicity for support. "I didn't mean..." "It's okay," Felicity assured me, "We just hate all the negative stereotypes out there concerning witches. It gets to be a real pain sometimes." "I guess I never really thought about it," I said. "Wait a minute... what do you mean 'we'...?" Felicity arched an eyebrow at me and smirked, "Welcome to the club, sister." "So what now?" I asked, "I mean, granted, it is a little bit of a relief knowing why and how this happened to me, but it doesn't do me much good otherwise." I looked at Felicity's aunt Lauren, "There has to be some way to reverse it. Certainly we haven't tried everything; I've only been here a half hour. There has to be something else we can try, Right?" Lauren looked taken aback. Clearly, she wasn't used to being talked to this way. "We could be here indefinitely grabbing at straws - You're right; there probably are spells that would work - , but the cure may be more damaging than the disease. You could end up even worse off than you are now." she said bluntly, "If I were you, I'd just leave well enough alone..." I wasn't sure how to take that, exactly. "I'd always thought that if true magic existed then the possibilities of its use would be limitless. After all, isn't the essence of magic just making the impossible real?" "Good point," Felicity said, "but I think you're approaching this from the wrong angle. It's not that the magic itself is limited... not if I understand what Aunt Lauren's taught me of it so far correctly, anyway... there's an unlimited supply of magical energy in the world, and that can be used for whatever purpose you can imagine... but the human mind can only comprehend forces of that magnitude by finding some way to describe it, and in doing so building self-imposed restraints on how they deal with it." "But if they're self-imposed, then they can be cast off." I said, "Besides, we already know it's possible to reverse a person's gender because it's already happened to me once. All we have to do is find a way to do it a second time." "Only Salome knew enough about what she's done to be able to undo it," Lauren stated, "There's more at work with this enchantment than just the surface effects. If someone who doesn't know all of its intricacies tries to alter it, the results could be catastrophic. It could be fatal... or worse. No, Alex dear, I'm afraid you're stuck like this until Salome herself is able to lift the spell." "Meaning forever," I said. My whole body sagged with the weight of what that meant... having to live out the rest of my life as a girl. "Tut-tut," Aunt Lauren chided me, "Never say never where magic is concerned. You were right about one thing, child, there are always possibilities. Salome may indeed be able to help us." "But I thought you said she was dead," Felicity said. "She was," Lauren explained, "but now a part of her lives within Alex. It's possible that Alex could learn the enchantment necessary to reverse the effects. Salome was a very powerful and talented witch, and I have no doubt that Alex could become one as well if she worked at it." "I'm willing to give it a shot if it means getting back to normal," I said. I looked to Lauren, "Will you teach me?" I asked. "I'll teach you how to use the gift that Salome has given you, but I don't have a manual for what's been done to you. The reversal spell is buried in your subconscious somewhere, jumbled up with all the other mystical knowledge Salome gave you. After you've studied the basics, it may free itself enough that you can access and make use of it. It'll either come or it won't," she said, "but it won't happen right away. And I won't teach anyone who isn't seriously willing to master their abilities. There's nothing more dangerous than someone who dabbles in things they don't fully understand." "But what if I never learn the reversal spell?" I whined. "Then you'll live a full and healthy life just as you would have anyway, child; you'll simply be doing so as a woman instead of as a man. There are worse fates, you know. You have to accept the fact that you may never be changed back, even if you do learn to control your abilities." Lauren said. That was something I wasn't ready to deal with quite yet. There had to be a way out of this, and I was intent on finding it no matter how long it took. "I understand. But for right now, I need to believe there's still a chance; otherwise, I don't have anything to work towards. " "Very well, then we'll begin your studies Monday, after you've had a few days to get settled into your new state a bit." Lauren said. "Oh, no!" I moaned, "My studies! There's no way I'm gonna be able to go to my classes like this! And it's too late in the term to drop out without affecting my average. Not that anyone would believe I am who I say I am, anyway. Two and a half years of college down the drain overnight. God, what a nightmare." "Maybe not," Felicity said and turned to her aunt, "Remember what you did for that lawyer? The one who needed to lay low? Wouldn't that work for Alex?" Lauren thought for a moment. "Yes, I think it just might, at that." She began rummaging around the back room for something, finally pulling a small brass urn from a shelf of strange looking knick-knacks and pouring the contents of a large ivory bottle from a second shelf into the urn. "Alex, dear, hand me your driver's license." I did as she asked, and she took a pair of scissors and cut it in two then tossed it into the urn. It sank out of sight in the murky liquid. "Now, take this piece of paper," she instructed, "and write the name you now wish to be called. Choose something appropriate to your new form." I thought about it for a few minutes, then wrote the name Alexis on the piece of paper. Lauren folded the paper and tossed it into the urn, as well. After a few seconds, the liquid began to clear until it was like looking at normal water. In the bottom of the urn was my driver's license, whole and uncut. Lauren reached into the urn and retrieved it for me. The name, the photograph, everything on it had changed. Alexis Cole Lacey had been born. "When you come back, bring me your class schedule and school transcript and any other documents you need changed, and I'll do the same thing for them," Lauren told me, "The spell is such that everyone will act as though you've always been Alexis instead of Alex. It's not strong enough to fool those closest to you, though --your friends and family-- because anyone you've given your heart to will always know you no matter what, but it should fool most casual aquaintences and strangers." "Wow," I said, "Maybe there's more to this being a witch stuff than I thought." "Oh, there's lots more," Lauren said, "but it's not all as easy as it seems, as I think you'll find out. For now, though, go home and get some rest. We'll start you off on Monday." "In the meantime," Felicity told me, "we'll need to do something about your wardrobe. I don't think any of your old clothes will fit you." "Probably not," I agreed, not liking where this was heading. "I have a few things you can borrow that may fit you," Felicity offered, "but we'll eventually need to buy you a few things." "I was sort of hoping that I'd get changed back before I had to worry about that sort of stuff," I admitted, fidgeting with a long strand of my hair with my finger as I spoke. "I'm afraid that's not very realistic," said Lauren, "You have to face the fact that you may be stuck like this for quite a while." I sighed, feeling the odd weight of my new breasts heave up and down heavily as I did so. "Then let's go ahead and get it over with," I said, resigning myself. "It'll be my treat," Felicity beamed, "C'mon, it'll be fun!" "Fine," I said, "but if I start getting excited over shoe sales, kill me." "Deal." With that, I acquiesced as Felicity practically dragged me out of Lauren's shop, and drove me to the mall to begin my training in the mysterious art of womanhood. ??? I am NOT wearing a skirt I told Felicity, putting my tiny little foot down firmly. I don't care what I look like; I'm a guy, and that's that. I crossed my arms in front of my pert little breasts, looking as adamant as I could. A strand of my long wavy auburn hair drifted down over my eyes, and with a big huff I sighed and blew it out of the way. A tiny smile tugged at the corner of Felicity's lips. "We came here to get you some new clothes," she said, "Hardly any of your old stuff still fits you now. Remember what Aunt Lauren told you? You could be stuck like this for awhile. Since you've become a girl, you should dress the part." "I know, but that skirt's way too revealing... I'm just not comfortable wearing something like that, at least not yet." I said. "All right, then for right now we'll stick to jeans and blouses. You look like a jeans girl, anyway. But you'll still need something underneath..." She indicated her chest, "Here...," she said and moved her hands down to indicate her waist, "and here..." "You mean... like... women's underwear...?" I blushed. I hadn't even thought of that yet. But I guess it did make sense. "Yeah," Felicity answered, "Come on, I'll help you find your size." We made our way to the lingerie section. I felt incredibly out of place, like I was some sort of infiltrator walking behind enemy lines. I looked around me at the racks of women's undergarments. Bras, panties, corsets, negligees, teddies, gowns... Why in the world did they have to make it so complicated? I nearly jumped out of my skin when a sales lady came over to help us, startling me. "How may I help you young ladies?" she asked. "My friend here is shopping for a new wardrobe," Felicity told her, "She's just recently lost some weight and isn't quite sure of her new size." The sales lady turned to me, "Let's go ahead and measure you, then. Can you raise your arms for me, Miss?" I did as she asked, and she took out a tape measure and ran it around my torso twice, once across my breasts and once just below. She wrote the numbers down on a piece of paper & did some quick figuring. "Looks like you're about a 34B cup," she said, "Let's go ahead and get your dress size." She ran the tape measure around my waist and then again around my hips, reading the numbers aloud as she did, "28 waist... 36...," she said, "You'll probably fit in a size 7 to 9. The sizes are labeled right on the tags; feel free to use the dressing room. Let me know if you need anything else." "Thanks," I said. When the sales lady was out of earshot, I whispered to Felicity, "I still don't know the first thing about this stuff, though... what exactly am I supposed to be looking for?" "Well, mainly you'll need a few bras and some underwear," she said picking through the racks. "But feel free to grab anything else that gets your attention. Don't worry about cost; today it's my treat." She pulled a sassy red bra and panty set off the rack and held it up to me. "Here, try this on; I bet it'd look sexy on you." I felt my cheeks flush with embarrassment as I took the undergarments. I stared at the bra. "Do I really have to wear one of these things?" I asked. Felicity's response was jolly, "You do if you want to keep your form," she joked. "Besides, who's going to know? It's not like anyone's going to recognize you. Aunt Lauren's spell took care of that. As far as anyone is concerned, you're just a normal girl wearing girl's clothes... nothing abnormal about that." She smirked and a trace of mischief seeped into her voice, "Besides, I think red's really your color." For my part, I just grew even redder in the face and resigned myself to my fate and the bra, adding it to the jeans and blouse I had already picked out to try on. Felicity ushered me into the changing room like a prisoner on death row being led to his execution. "Yell if you need a hand," she told me. The dressing room was larger than most men's dressing rooms that I'd been in; big enough that there was a full length wooden park bench on one side, and a large floor-to-ceiling mirror along the back wall. I looked at myself in the mirror; a young girl about 5'4" with long wavy auburn hair wearing men's sweat pants and a poofy black silk poet's shirt looked back at me. I couldn't believe that she was me. I peeled off the clothes I'd worn into the store, stepping out of my boxer shorts after I had the sweats off. I pulled the red silk panties on first; they slid up my smooth legs until I had them all the way up. They felt odd sliding across my ass cheeks as I bent to pick up the bra. I stared at the bra for a moment. I was going to wear a bra? Shyly, I put my arms through the straps and pulled the straps over my shoulders. I cupped my breasts and placed them in the cups of the bra, leaning forwards as I did so, then reached my arms behind my back and tried to fasten the hooks. It took me a few tries, but I finally managed it. It felt like someone had locked my chest into a vice; very uncomfortable. The jeans and blouse were next, neither of which gave me much of a problem. The strangest part about that was having to get used to all the buttons being on the opposite side of what they were on men's clothing. Fully dressed in my new clothes, I took stock of myself again in the mirror. I looked like a typical young woman, her hips fitting snugly into the denim jeans, her blouse revealing her shapely features (which seemed to be accentuated by the bra's push-up effect). The girl in the mirror took a deep breath, her breasts rising and falling beneath her blouse. She blew a lock of her long, Auburn hair out of her eyes, cocked her hip to one side and brushed her hair out of her face with a slender hand. She was really very attractive. If I were still a guy, I might even get turned on by her... "Whoa... What am I thinking?" I said to myself. "You okay in there, Alex?" Felicity called from outside the dressing room. "No... be right out," I answered. To the girl in the mirror I muttered, "Well, cutie, we might as well get this over with..." I stepped out of the dressing room in the new outfit, glancing around the clothing store in embarrassment. I was sure someone was going to come over and chastise me for 'playing dress up'. No one else in the store even gave me a second glance, though. To them, I was just another girl doing what tons of other girls did on the weekend, shopping and trying on clothes. "Wow," Felicity said, "Alex, you look great. You're really a very pretty girl." Still embarrassed, I put my hands in the pocket of the jeans and shied away from Felicity's appraisal. I had no idea at all how to take her compliment. Being a pretty girl wasn't exactly on the top of my list. I'd much rather that either I or Lauren could wave a magic wand and return me to my old male self. On the other hand, if I had to be a girl... well, it did feel good to know that I was at least a nice looking one. We took the tags off all the clothes I had on and gave them to the sales lady, telling her that I had decided to just wear the new outfit out of the store. Then we brought everything Felicity and I had picked out up to the counter. In all, I'd ended up with 4 new bras, several pairs of underwear (in a full spectrum of colors... why they all couldn't just be white, I didn't understand), several pairs of socks (also in various colors), 5 pairs of jeans in various cuts, 5 blouses, 3 t-shirts, 2 pairs of shoes, a purse (what I had to put in it I had no idea, but Felicity insisted on getting it...), and 1 skirt (Felicity talked me into it); plus the outfit I had on. Felicity wouldn't show me the receipt, and when I asked her how much it had cost she just smiled and said that I was worth it and that I had needed everything she'd bought me. "Let's stop in the food court and get a bite to eat before we look at cosmetics, okay?" Felicity suggested as we left the clothing store weighted down with bags. "Sure," I said, "Come to think of it, I am pretty hungry." I hadn't eaten anything all day; I'd been too sick this morning after the transformation. Waiting in line at the pizza place, we ran into a friend of ours from campus, a boy by the name of Matt Watkins. He'd been on the varsity football team the year before and had a room down the hall from me when I still lived in the dorms my freshman year. He was the sort of square-jawed, baby-faced guy that lots of girls found attractive, though I'd always thought it looked like he was trying too hard. Still, there was a sort of lost puppy-dog cuteness to him, I guess. If you were into that sort of thing, which I reminded myself I most definitely was not. The last thing I wanted to do was pick up some guy. "Felicity!" he called, "Hey, how are you? I haven't seen you since Dave's party. What've you been up to?" "Hey, Matt," Felicity greeted him. "Just out doing some clothes shopping. How have you been?" "Doing pretty well... the usual; you know," he shrugged as he answered, then gave me a really weird sidelong glance and asked, "Hey, who's your friend, Felicity?" "Matt, this is Alexis; Alexis, Matt," Felicity kept up the appearance of introducing us even though Matt and I were old buddies, and he just didn't know it. "Alexis...," Matt said, drawing the name out, "Cool name." He gave me another strange look. Why the hell was he looking at me like that? Had I forgotten to take one of the tags off my blouse or something? I felt his eyes gravitate to my torso, then slowly work their way back up to my face. He shot me another of his looks. He was starting to make me really uncomfortable. "Hey, it's good that I ran into you both," he said to us, "the varsity team's throwing a party tonight, and it would be really great if you could come, Felicity. You too, Alexis. There'll be lots of people, live band, alcohol... it should be a blast." "We'll keep it in mind," Felicity said, "I think we had something else planned, but if that doesn't pan out we may drop in." "Coolness! Catch ya later, Felicity. Great meeting you, Alexis," Matt said as he gave us both another once-over with his eyes then strolled off. "I think he really liked you," Felicity teased as Matt walked away. "Spare me. Did you see the way he was oglings us?" I said. "No more than most guys do," Felicity told me, "You might as well just get used to it. Guys have, like, no concept of subtlety." "I think I've lost my appetite," I said. "Hmmm...," Felicity said as though in deep thought, "Maybe you're right... pizza is pretty fattening. After all, we have to watch our girlish figures, don't we, Alex honey?" She nearly doubled over laughing as I lost my composure. "Some days," I muttered, "it's best not to get out of bed..." The trip to the cosmetics counter of JC Penny turned out to be a two-hour ordeal. Felicity insisted that I get a full make-over so I could get a feel for wearing some of the various make-ups before I bought them, and the saleswoman was only too eager to please. I think she smelled a large commission. Outvoted, I once again resigned myself to enduring another part of the 'great feminine experience' as Felicity put it. I never knew that girls put so much work into looking good for others. Sitting there as the saleswoman applied the make-up, I felt like an actor getting ready to go on stage opening night. The have cleansers for places I didn't even know I had dirt. By the time we were through, Felicity had spent over a hundred dollars at the cosmetics counter alone... and I discovered exactly why she had insisted that I have a purse: you have to have one to carry all this stuff around with you. I had to admit, though, in an odd way it did feel good to be pampered like that. I could see why so many women tied so much of their self-worth to their appearance. Looking good and knowing it makes a girl feel good... even if she doesn't want to admit it. I hardly recognized myself in the mirror when she was finished, which was doubly weird since I still basically had the same face I'd had as a man; just softer in certain places. I'd have never thought that I could look that good. Problem is, I looked good in the wrong way... I wanted to look like Mel Gibson, but ended up looking more like Julia Roberts. It was nearly dark by the time we made it back to my apartment. The trip to the mall had really drained me. Between that and waking up that morning to find I'd changed genders, then meeting Felicity's aunt and being told that I was housing the spirit of a dead witch inside me & I'd been given her powers... well, it had been a full day all around. Felicity helped me carry all my shopping bags inside and unpack them in the closet. We made room by going through all my old male clothes and boxing up all the things that I could no longer wear. I saved a couple of old shirts to wear around the apartment when I didn't want to have to dress up. My old football jersey was big enough on me now that I decided to use it as a nightshirt. We did the same thing with the dresser drawers, replacing my old boxer shorts and such with the bras and panties Felicity had bought me. By that time, we were both getting pretty tired. This whole thing had been almost as trying on Felicity as it had on me. I was hoping that she would stay the night... not for any ulterior motives; just because I didn't feel like being alone. But with everything she had already done for me, I felt too timid to ask. "Would you like a drink?" I asked her as we came back into the living room. "Sure," she said. I mixed two margaritas, careful to go a little lighter on the tequila than usual just in case my smaller frame had decreased my tolerance level. "Thanks a lot for helping me out today," I said as I handed Felicity her drink, "I don't know what I would have done without you." "Don't mention it," she told me, "You'd have done the same thing for me." "Still, you've been a big help. I want you to know it really means a lot to me." I took a sip of my margarita as I spoke. "I can't imagine what it must be like," she said, "I'm not so sure I would have held up as well as you have today." She took another sip of her drink then placed it on the coffee table. "I guess it hasn't quite set in yet. It's like I've been in a daze all day, just reacting. I'm not so sure how I'm gonna deal with having to stay like this indefinitely. I guess I'll just have to take it one day at a time." "If you need anything, just ask." she told me, "I know it must be tough getting used to everything. If you have any questions, or if you just want to talk... let me know." "Thanks," I said, "that helps." "That's what I'm here for," she told me. We finished our drinks over small talk, laughing over the way Matt had fawned over us and joking over some of the quirkier moments from the day's events... mostly my confusion over various female habits and clothing. I wanted to ask Felicity to stay over, but never quite found a way to. It was close to midnight when she left. As I was finishing my third drink, it occurred to me that it had been nearly a full twenty-four hours since my transformation. I made my way shakily to the bedroom; the drinks had caught up with me quicker than I thought they would. I started taking my clothes off to get ready for bed, fumbling with the blouse's reversed buttons with my shaky hands. Halfway through, my reflection in the mirror caught my interest. I looked at the girl in the mirror, clad only in a red bra and panties and wobbling unsteadily on her feet. "Some man you are," I told her, "letting the girl you love run off on you on a night like this... and if that wasn't enough, going and getting yourself girled on top of things." I fumbled with the straps of the bra, trying to unhook the clasp. When that proved futile, I just slid the shoulder straps off and tried turning the bra around so the clasp was in the front. Maybe if I could see it... "You deserve these breasts of yours," I told the girl in the mirror, "Maybe next time you'll think twice about buying one of these infernal contraptions." Finally, the clasp came undone, and I gave a triumphant yelp of glee then collapsed on the floor in a fit of giggles. As the giggle fit died off, I crawled over to the bed and hoisted myself in using the sheets to pull myself up. "At least," I told myself as I drifted off to sleep, "tomorrow can't be any worse." That night, I dreamt that I was my normal male self again. Felicity had agreed to go out with me, and we had a blast... dinner, dancing, a carriage ride in the park, and finally walking along the beach at night. The two of us strode hand in hand just above where the surf stretched to an end. Felicity was wearing the most beautiful blue dress, and her short blonde hair looked gorgeous and elegant. She had her shoes off and was walking barefoot in the sand. I had actually worn a nice suit, and carried the dinner jacket draped over my shoulder now that we were away from the crowds. We kicked sand at each other playfully, and Felicity sprinted up the beach like a gazelle. She tossed her shoes aside and called for me to follow her. I threw the dinner jacket into the ocean and took off after her. I caught up to her further down the beach, and we fell into each other, kissing each other over and over again. Felicity lay down in the sand, took my hand, and pulled me towards her. "I want you," she said as I lay down beside her in the sand. "I love you," I told her, "I always have, and I always will." The waves were crashing behind us now, and I could feel them pounding inside me like thunder. My heart was racing. I leaned forward and kissed Felicity again, but she stopped me in mid-kiss and pulled away. "What's wrong?" I asked her. "It's just not going to work between us," she told me, "I don't date girls." "But I'm not...," I started, then stopped when I felt my breasts jiggle as I tilted forward. Shocked, I tore the front of my dress shirt open and stared down at the feminine protrusions there. I looked back up at Felicity and pleaded, "But, I don't know how this happened..." But it was too late; she was already gone. The next day was Saturday, and I was glad of it. I woke up late, early afternoon sunlight trailing into the darkened bedroom through the half opened blinds. My head was killing me. How much did I drink last night? Pieces of the dream came floating back to me, mingled with events from the previous day. How strange to dream that I'd turned into a girl, I thought. Where had that come from, anyway? Head still foggy, I crossed the hall to the bathroom. My whole body felt swollen for some reason. Still half asleep, I stood in front of the toilet to pee, then reached to pull down my underwear. They felt wrong. What were these things? Silk briefs? When had I gotten those? That's about the time I started running into problems. For some stupid reason, this damned hangover of mine was affecting my motor skills... I couldn't seem to find my penis, even with both hands down there searching for it. God, I thought, don't ever let the guys hear about this... That's when it all suddenly came back to me in a massive flooding rush. "Oh, God," I cried and stumbled to the mirror, red panties dangling around my knees. I sounded like a panicked schoolgirl. "Please, no..." I pleaded, hoping my reflection wouldn't show me what I knew I'd find. A feminine version of my normal self stared back at me in the mirror. Worse, she looked as bad as I felt. I'd forgotten to take off the make-up from the cosmetics counter before I went to bed, and now my cheeks and eyes were puffy and smudged, and there was a lipstick smear across my chin. My hair was a tangled mess. "My God," I muttered, "I've turned into the elephant woman." My knees felt weak, and I suddenly needed to sit down. I also still needed to pee. Convenient, that. I sat down on the toilet, letting my panties drop to the cold tile floor, and began wondering how exactly I was supposed to