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January 3 How is any of this possible? This damned body...how the hell can it be mine!? It feels do damned weird. The size, the shape, and these fucking hormones! I don't know who I feel like anymore, but it sure as hell isn't me... I don't know if anybody's going to believe me, except everybody who was there I guess. Hell, even some of them aren't fucking sure. But how could I expect anybody to believe any of this? This whole damned thing is absolutely beyond belief. It simply shouldn't have been possible for somebody to change...you know, like this.... But I did. I don't know what I'm going to do. My life, my job, my family.... Is it all gone? I keep expecting to wake up, like this was some sort of bad dream. But the inescapable truth is that I'm awake. And this nightmare isn't going to end... January 15 I'm feeling a little better today. I'm finally starting to get everything sorted out, legally anyway. It's still tough going at times, but people are starting to give in, little by little. Thank God Joe had his camera running for that whole ordeal. He got the whole damned thing on tape! Don't get me wrong, there's still a bunch of those damned lawyers who are screaming special effects, but I sure as hell haven't ever seen any like those before, and I'll be damned if they've been able to produce any! I think I might get through this whole thing with my identity somewhat in tact. But that still doesn't mean anything for the rest of my life. I think I lost my job, but Mr. Jacobson still refuses to acknoledge me as...well, me. He keepskeeps saying he won't talk to me about it. Honestly I don't think I would want to go back to working for that self righteous prick again after all this is over, even if he would let me. As for my family, well, I don't know yet. I just hope that they can accept me who, and what I've become. Anyway, I'm off to go see where the most important relationship in my life stands. I sure hope it goes well. January 23 It's over... I can't believe it! 3 years down the drain! I don't even know how to feel! Should I be thankful? I mean how could I have expected it to work out? I mean, what would people think... I mean, God, we're the same sex now, aren't we? But I still feel horrible. I know my body's changed, and my mind keeps telling me that it would never have worked, but my heart...my heart keeps telling me that I should have tried harder to hang on. Did I do the right thing? Should I have fought to keep us together? After it was over, I punched a wall...then I cried...I guess that just about sums it up. There's two parts of me, the male and the female, and they're constantly at war these days. In the end, I'm not sure which side is going to win... Maybe neither.... Febuary 2 The legal stuff's finally taken care of, minus a few loose ends here and there. Nothing major's left though. Mr. Jacobson seemed none too pleased to have to speak to me as though I was who I said I was, but I think he took some grim satisfaction in telling me that I'd been fired for not showing up to work. The worst part of it all is that I did try to show up! Fuck maybe I should sue or something.... But I don't think I really care that much anymore. It wasn't that great a job anyway. Mark and Sally came over today. I have to admit, they're great friends, and I don't know if I'd have been able to get through all this without them. They've been incredibley supportive thoughout all of this, even when everybody else seemed to be giving me the cold shoulder. Mark keeps saying I should try dating again...with members of the now opposite sex! Sally thinks I should take some more time to decide how I feel before I make that kind of decission. I don't know who's right... Febuary 3 That's what I get for listening to Mark... The date was a disaster. I really feel bad too, because it's not like the person Mark set me up with wasn't nice, but the poor sap had no idea what to do when I kept acting all...well, like me. The weird thing is, even if I could keep going out with members of my current sex, I'm not sure that it wouldn't work out the same way. I don't know which side of the proverbial gender fence I'm on anymore. I don't think I care either. February 12 Today was hell. I ran all around town, trying to fill out applications and interview for new jobs. I never realized how much sexual politics went on in the whole process. Stuff I used to do subconsciously now makes me either come across as cold and distant, or gay, depending who I'm talking to. Joe was a bit slow coming around, but he's been great over the last couple days. He even offered me a job, just until I can get back on my feet again. It's not exactly what I was looking for, or what I'm trained for for that matter, but it may have to do until I can get on my feet again. February 20 A letter! I mean, God, could it get any more impersonal! They're my parents, for the love of God! How could they just... And with a letter!? The apartment's thrashed, and my eyes burn from all the crying. But what else can you expect? I mean, they absolutely disowned me! And with a letter! I don't think I've ever felt so low in my life. Even right after all this started. I guess I was still in shock, and now it's finally hitting me full force. I mean, it's going to be like this, for the rest of my life.... I don't know what to do anymore. The job with Joe...it's not working out. I don't think he would fire me, but I can't just mooch off of his sympathy forever. I'm going to quit in the morning. I don't know what I'm going to do after that. March 15 It's been a while since I've written in this thing. They just let me out...of the psych ward. I guess I had a complete breakdown. It's not so surprising really. I guess the stress was just too much for me. Some of the doctors suggested a sex change might be the answer. But then what would I be? I mean, wouldn't that still just be pretending? Could I really just go back to being what I was like nothing ever happened. I guess I can never be entirely the same again though. I mean, I couldn't have kids. And I would still genetically be...what I've become. Not to mention my new size definitely belies my...genetic gender I guess you can call it. I'm not sure I could even pass anymore, even if they did shoot me up with hormones. Not that it wouldn't be nice to get the normal ones running through my body again. The ones that are in me now, they make me feel so....different. I don't know, I guess I'll sleep on it. March 20 I've finally made a decision. I'm going to do it. The doctors who they referred me to, they don't know what to do with me. I mean, normally, you have to live as the other gender for a while before you can switch and all this other crap, but my situation is....unique. They're starting me on hormones right away, which is something I suppose. They make me feel a little more...normal I guess you can call it, though I'm not sure that's quite the right word for it. It's still not like it was, but I guess it's something. March 23 I've never felt so alone... I guess my whole...ordeal is starting to weird people out. I mean, even the people who stuck with me after I changed are starting to shy away from me. Even Sally and Chris are starting to distance themselves, in a polite sort of way. They've got me going to some support group, but I'm even an outsider there. My situation...it's not really like anybody else's. A few of the others are bitter that I'm cutting through a lot of the red tape that's been holding them back for so long. A few more are jealous of my change and can't fathom why I would want to switch back. The rest are just...I don't know, confused by me... I need to find somebody, anybody out there who might be willing to accept me for who...and what I am. I wonder if they're out there. March 30 I've never been so happy in my life! I found somebody! I mean...God I can't even think straight right now I'm so excited. I mean, they understand me! They get me! Do you have any idea how exhilerating that is!? I mean, I've finally found somebody who accepts me! All of me! Exactly as I am! Gotta run, more later... April 3 May 16! That's the date. The date when I'm finally going to get back into the body I belong in, and not this...this abomination I've been forced to endure for the last several months. I mean, between this and...well, you- know-who, I think I might just be able to get through all of this with my sanity in tact. Hell, we're even talking about moving in together. I know, it's fast. I mean, I've never been much for taking big steps like that so early in a relationship. It took me a whole year last time...but...but this just feels so right. We're going out again tonight. Some fancy place downtown that just opened up. Anyway, gotta run. May 2 I know, it's been a while since I've written, but I've just been so busy lately. We decided to move in together. We've got a new appartment picked out and everything. You know, neither of ours was quite big enough for the both of us. We've been moving stuff pretty much steady for the last week or so, not to mentions sorting through everything trying to decide what to keep and what to toss. After all, we've got two appartments worth of stuff! The big day's only two weeks away. The two of us, we haven't...well, you know. We're talking about...maybe once before hand....just to see what it's like. I'm a little hesitant though. I mean, what if we like it too much? I mean, with the hormones and all, I'm hardly looking like...well, either gender anymore I guess. I'm kinda in some sort of sexual limbo. It's fine for the moment, but...I don't know if I could just stay like this... May 8 Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit. I don't know what I'm going to do. I mean, I'm having some serious second thoughts here... We did it...and it was like...wow. It wasn't like anything I've ever experienced before. I don't know if I really want to give that up. I mean, it was the most amazing thing I've ever felt in my life! I don't know what I'm going to do yet. We're going out to dinner tonight. I figure that'll be a good time to talk about it. May 15 I'm going through with it. We talked about it for a long time. It's pretty much all we've talked about for the last week. We decided that it would just be too weird for me to just...stay like this. I mean, The sex was great and all, but it's just sex. There's other, you know, social aspects to consider and stuff like that. I think the doctors were beginning to get concerned that I might be reconsidering. I've been trying to cover it up as best as I can. I mean, they would call this thing off in a heart beat if they thought I was having second thoughts, especially considering how relatively quickly we raced through the whole process. But they haven't called it off yet, and I don't think they're going to come up with any good excuse to between today and tomorrow. We're going to do it again tonight, one last time. For posterity's sake. I can't wait, for it or for tomorrow. June 1 What have I done... This is what I wanted, isn't it? I should be happy, shouldn't I? This is the body I'm supposed to have, isn't it!? Isn't it!? I'm beginning to think the operation was a huge mistake. Things just aren't...well, they just aren't right. Physically... mentally... spritually.... this just doesn't seem like the way it should be...like I should be. When I was walking that thin line between male and female I well, I became somehow whole again. Now that I've you know, comitted to one again, I just feel like...like... Like I've given up a part of myself... We're going out tonight...to celebrate, though I'm not really sure that I shouldn't be mourning instead. The worst thing is, I don't think my feelings are mutual... I'm beginning to feel alone again... June 13 It's over... We broke up. I guess the whole thing just got too weird... I'm beside myself. I don't know what to do anymore. I have nobody...nothing anymore. I've let everybody, everything I ever cared about slip away. I don't know what to do anymore... That's a lie. I know exactly what to do. There's only one thing I can do... To anybody who reads this...don't do what I did. If you find something that makes you happy, go with it! If you find somebody that makes you happy, never let them go! Everything about you is precious. You can't just shun a part of yourself and try to go on living without it. There are a precious few things in this world that can truly make you happy. Fight, and never let those things go. As for me...I'm done fighting.... The End.

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Arriving home after a long shift, I almost don't notice a slightly bulky envelope among my mail. I glance at the return address and smile. Brushing aside my bills, I slit open the envelope. Out falls a single paper cocktail umbrella. I pick it up and twirl it around in my fingers. The sight of it brings a rush of memories. I tuck it behind my ear, sit down in my favorite chair, and let my mind wander.~~~~I remember clearly the first time I saw a cocktail umbrella. As a child, my family lived in...

Actions and Consequences Part Seven Onto Better Things

"Flight Eight-ten is now boarding for Houston, Texas," the lady said over the intercom."That's me," I said to the guy sitting next to me. For the last hour we had been having a conversation, well, I was holding a conversation with him. He was having a conversation with my cleavage."Okay," he said as he sounded disappointed."If you join any of those sites, we will talk more," I said as I walked away.That was how the conversation got started. He thought he had seen me before and well, he...

A WellLived Life Book 6 Kara IChapter 23 In the Swing of Things

November, 1981, Chicago, Illinois The days were growing shorter — well, the daylight portion, anyway, because the days were still twenty-four hours long — and the weather was getting cooler. On Monday, Mike, the guy in my calculus class, asked me if I’d be interested in joining a fraternity. He was a member of Theta Xi. They had a house on the fraternity quad and most of the guys were into engineering, and their president was the head teaching assistant for Doctor Bauer. That made it mildly...

The Most Precious Things

AUTHORS NOTE: The following is a most unusual TG story as the changes are assumed to have happened before the story was written. However this is vital because I wanted to explore an aspect of TG stories I have never seen explored before. It is a very short story, but I hope you like it, it looks at the whole TG transformation concept from a whole new mindset entirely. THE MOST PRECIOUS THINGS It?s been five years since my wife and I swapped, five lonely, confusing, desolate...

Favorite Things

Favorite Things By Donna Williams "We'll be dining out for Christmas dinner tomorrow, Marie. You don't need to slave over dinner this holiday." "That sounds wonderful," I responded. I so rarely have a day off from my maid duties, since I confided my cross-dressing desires to my wife three years ago. "Finish cleaning the kitchen and go to bed early Marie. Santa won't come if you're awake. I want you wear your little girl, pink, satin pajamas to bed, so when my little girl wakes,...

Incredible ChangesChapter 164 Touristy Things

So, with this herbal pill Molly gave me I will feel good, but I won’t cum or get hard. Will that actually still stop me from attracting girls who might be interested in having sex with me? After packing up we checked out before hearing from the airbase toward the Budweiser Brewery. Molly wanted to do the tour before we got back on the road. I was surprised when they didn’t bat an eye at us taking the tour without any adults chaperoning us. They even offered us small samples of the various...

Caught by Uncle in Aunts things

When I was a young boy, I started to find a fascination with feminine things. Not sure how it started, but one day I found myself trying on some of my Moms things and enjoyed the feeling. The issue I found early was that my Mom was very vanilla in her things, so I started to explore with an Aunts things, one I spent a lot of time with, as her son and I were very close. She had very sexy panties, bras, slips and pantyhose, so I would sneak them into the bathroom at her house, put them on and...

Angie Tries Many New Things

It was a Friday afternoon and my wife, Karen, called me and said that she was going to go out with a friend. She knew I had a dinner planned with a customer and the kids were gone for the weekend so it was her ticket to have fun. She said her friend Angie’s husband Mike was traveling so it was girl’s night out. Angie was in her early 40’s and I had always thought she might hot if she dressed a little more proactively and was a little more out-going, something my wife has no...

The ProfessorChapter 2 Familiarity Breeds Lots of Things

I’d been assigned four classes to teach for the semester: two sections of Introduction to Computers and Programming (freshman level); a class in Geographic Information Systems that I’d created two years prior; and a senior-level course entitled Organization of Computer Systems, that got into the guts and design of both computers and operating software. By the end of the first week, I had seen about eighty new faces in the introductory classes, and renewed acquaintances with another twenty in...

Onlyfans LiaChapter 11 Broaching New Things

“So this is just a quick fashion show. Sort of, anyway,” Lia explained as I followed into her studio bedroom. I’d been expecting a quiet Wednesday evening with nothing more than a little light cuddling in front of the television, but instead of that Lia had pre-warned me we would probably be moving on to the boning stage of the evening earlier than usual or as she had described it in her lunchtime email, ‘at the drop of a pair of knickers’. “So this is going to be a fashion show but only...

Actions and Consequences Part Eight Getting the Hang of Things

"Hey!" Michael said as he saw me enter the studio.I smiled and greeted the director with a gigantic hug."Glad to see you aren't like the others," he said as he stared at my chest. "All these women getting reductions these days."I had worked with him on my previous interracial shoot; it had been almost a year since my first porn shoot. I was happy to work with him again. The last two were a pain to deal with, always wanting to change things. I knew with him at least all I had to do was show my...

Dream MasterChapter 39 Little Things

It had been two and a half weeks since Bastion had been arrested – two weeks since my big argument with Allison and Jamie. I was the one who called Allison in to talk to Jamie about her desire to torment Bastion, but I was prepared for – even expected – Allison to go along with it. Jamie was right; I'd seen the video, seen the damage – both mental and physical – that he had inflicted on these girls. I'd seen – through their own dreams, and visions shared by their protectors – the things...

My maid like doing kinky things

Hi an ISS reader, my name is Ajay. I am 21 years old person. I stay in Delhi. I want to share my experience, which has happened with our maidservant, about one month back, which is 100% true. Believe me friends, I am not cooking up some story and posting it. Our maid’s name is Dulaari. She is some 30 years old lady and she is little dark. The key thing to be noticed in her is her boobs. She has very fat boobs. She always wears her saree below her navel, so her navel can be seen clearly whenever...

The Tide RisesChapter 3 All Good Little Things

At dawn, the morning after our wedding ceremony-celebration, an impending shower threatens a deluge! Amaru and I are anxious with concern! The damp will ruin our love warmed wedding bed, where we spent the night making love under the old oak tree. Can’t dampen our spirits! A little precipitation can’t fog our happiness! It CAN make our bed miserable to lie in! Out of the foggy haze came riding shiny knights in wet slickers! Muddy clay clods spraying from their horse’s galloping hooves, our...

Ladies Things

A plain white bra. Firstly, because he would be able to hide it under his clothes. Secondly (and most importantly) because it would help with the nipple problem. They've been getting tender and sore. He's a bit older than I was when I first started wearing bras, so I felt confident that he would be able to manage it. Obviously he never imagined he'd have to ever wear one, but then I never expected to be buying ladies' underwear for my son. It goes both ways. Anyway I worried he would...

Needful Things

Part One – The artefact Diiinggg! The shop bell gave a resounding ring as Mrs Pennington pushed open the door of the dingy old shop. Amelia Pennington was the haughty national delegate of the Association of Towns Women’s Clubs and as such she travelled around the country to various meetings. As a keen collector of antiques and objet d’art, whenever she saw an antique shop she just had to have a browse around. On entering the shop which rejoiced in the name of ‘NEEDFUL THINGS’ she immediately...

PurcellChapter 9 Learning New Things

When Gabe Lincoln led his delegation to the Republican National Convention in May of ‘68, he realized that the formula for assigning seats had been to their disadvantage. On a historical basis, Alabama had no Republican presence in ‘64 and a census population of less than 800,000. Well, next time would be different, and he was a state party chairman. Since every potential candidate but Grant had withdrawn, he didn’t expect a long affair. The committee had scrambled to find accommodations...

Naturist SchoolChapter 2 Trying New Things

By the time I met Claire for dinner I was gradually becoming more accustomed to camp. I insisted that she sit next to me so that it didn't feel like I was staring at her breasts every time I looked up from my plate. Claire was patient with me and it felt natural to open up. After dinner there was an all camp "barn" dance. As most of us were new to the naturist lifestyle, the campers from Sunset High School came dressed out of respect for our 'modesty.' There were some stunning...

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