Realization
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Realizations
By: Ann O'Nonymous
"Well, so far, so good! Now to get to my apartment," Jack Roberts
thought as he tried to make his way up the sidewalk. "Only a half
block to go!" He staggered along, occasionally almost stumbling in
the very unfamiliar 3" heels, trying to maintain his balance and keep
his cuffed wrists as much out-of-sight as possible. There he was -- a
Master's degree candidate -- wearing a frumpy dress, cheap perfume
any "real" woman would refuse, somewhat overdone makeup, high heels
and a shoulder bag. If anyone ever saw him, he was sure they would
die laughing.
Coming to a corner, he carefully looked for traffic before crossing
the street and proceeding down to the entrance of his apartment
building, stopping at the locked security door. Fumbling around in
this alien item ("his purse") for the keys to this barrier took
precious minutes risking detection by another of the mostly student
residents entering or leaving. After checking the area, he put the
key in the lock, turned it and opened the door. "Whew! I'm finally
home." He breathed a sigh of relief and started up the stairs to the
third floor. "Oh, please don't let anybody see me like this," he
silently prayed. Jack was able to get almost to the front door of his
apartment when disaster struck!
"Jack? Jack, is that you?"
"Oh great," Jack thought. It was the pretty student who lived in the
apartment across the hall. He had met and talked with her several
times, either coming in, going out, or in the laundry room.
"Hi, Miss Saunders. Yes, it's me," Jack said rather dejectedly. He
turned around to face her.
Nancy Saunders, a six-foot raven-haired beauty, was standing in the
doorway to her apartment wearing Malibu slippers and a lightly tied
pastel blue robe over a pale blue nylon nightgown that accentuated
her well-toned curves. He knew her to be studying at his school,
where she was a phys-ed major, and, he believed, a lesbian. At least
he never saw her go out with a male. "Well, don't you look pretty,"
she said rather mischievously. "Why don't you come in for awhile and
visit."
"Is that a request, or ..."
"Of course, dear. Why would it be anything else?"
"I really don't know. Recently, I've had a few bad days and I'm not
too sure of anything anymore." Jack decided to accept her "friendly"
invite. Upon entering her apartment, Jack remarked, "nice place you
got here."
Laughing, Nancy teased, "Yep, Tex. Ah like it. I'll bet you say that
to all the girls," before resuming her seat. "I was just going to
make a cup of hot chocolate. Want to join me?" She patted the sofa
beside her, "Sit down over here, right next to me."
Closing the door, Jack walked over and, with the best grace he could
muster, took the offered seat.
"My, you did that rather nicely, considering."
"I've had a lot of practice the last few days. Could you get these
handcuffs off," he asked, holding out his hands. "I was told the keys
were in the bag. I'm sorry to say I really don't know whether to
trust them or not!"
Nancy took the bag in her hands, opened it and searched. "Well,
let's see: lipstick, tissues, spare panties and two liners, compact,
oh naughty, tampons and condoms - tsk, tsk, as if you'll ever need
them; tampons, that is. Comb, brush, hankies, money - two tens and
two twenties ... Oh, here they are - keys," she said adding, "Strange
isn't it! What you're looking for is always on the bottom. It should
be this small one, or, should I just leave them on you?"
"Come on, Miss Saunders, please get these things off."
"Nancy, Jack! Please call me Nancy. I'll have them removed in a
second." She took the keys and tried one followed by another.
Finally, the cuffs were history. "There you are: free. Give me your
foot."
Jack raised his leg, as she bent down. Taking his foot in her hand,
she exclaimed, "Just as I thought! These ankle straps have locks on
them. You do have a pair of really good-looking legs!" Saying that,
she looked up at him with an enigmatic grin prior to resuming her
search in the bag. Long minutes later, with "here they are," she
produced a set of smaller keys. With a few seconds work, he was
finally free of those painful objects.
"Why don't you get that coat off, while I get you a pair of
slippers?" As she left the room, Jack, deciding to accept her offer,
removed the coat and hung it on the back of the door. "Where do you
keep the chocolate, Nancy," he asked.
"Sit down and relax! You're my guest." Nancy soon returned with a
pair of slippers that she placed on Jack's stocking-encased feet.
"Care for a beer?"
"Hot chocolate, or coffee, please. I stopped drinking beer long ago!"
"Okay, I'll put the coffeemaker to work," she stated, as she left
for the kitchen area. "Decaf, or something a little fancy?"
"Whatever you got," Jack replied. Feeling more relaxed he got up and
strolled around several bookcases noting books on Tae Kwan Do, Tai
Chi, Karate, Meditation, and Akido, as well as Tao. Mencius competed
with Sun Tzu; Lao Tzu matched space with Confucius. A Kwan Yin statue
rested atop one case.
After awhile, Nancy brought in two cups of coffee with an "I hope
you take yours black with one sugar."
"Yes, as a matter of fact I do! How did you know?"
"I guessed. Well now, I guess you'll tell me how you got to be in a
dress. Some initiation, huh!"
Jack thought a while prior to answering: "Nope. Do you want the
Reader's Digest, the book length or the unexpurgated Tom Cruise Movie
Release version?"
"Oh, give me all the sordid details! I don't have classes tomorrow,
and I don't think you have any either. Seeing you like that has my
morbid curiosity aroused!"
Seeing Nancy dressed as she was had something of Jack aroused also!
"Well, okay, here goes. You see I have five students, all female,
that I tutor to make some extra money. They took exception to the way
I tried to instill a love of learning in them. Last Friday around
noon, they grabbed me and took me to a house just outside town. They
made me a baby."
"Didn't you try to fight them off?"
Jack stiffened a bit. "I have never, and hope to God never will, hit
a female. I do think I'll probably die first."
"Now that's admirable, Jack. I guess I'd probably use them for
practice. Now, what do you mean, a baby?"
"Well they put me in diapers, plastic pants, gown, booties and into
an oversized baby's crib! My hands were taped so I could not use
them, and they placed an oversized dummy in my mouth and secured it
at the back of my head with a ribbon. Later, one of the girls
actually breastfed me!"
"I bet you enjoyed that!" Nancy started to smirk at the thought of
him with his mouth on a girl's nipple, suckling away.
Jack's face flushed a bright scarlet. "Actually, I did. I'm ashamed
to admit it, but it was 'interesting.' Anyway, they kept me in a crib
overnight. The next morning, they said I had grown. Now, they put me
in a little girl's outfit. Mary Janes, I think that's what they're
called, anklets with those lacy tops, very frilly petticoats, rumba
panties, and a party dress. They put a wig on me, a long curly
Shirley Temple like thing, and they changed my outfits several times.
I don't know how much it cost, but I imagine they spent a lot!"
"I would say so. Little girl's clothes for someone your size, wow!"
"Hey, I'm not that big! I was allowed to go outside, where they had
me playing girl's games like Jacks and Hopscotch, go swinging on a
swing set, showing off my pretty pettis and panties. Even had a tea
party with two dolls and a stuffed teddy bear. I don't know how many
pictures they took. There were at least four cameras and, I think,
they used two or three rolls of film in a camera. I do have to admit
I lost a lot of tension just swinging, not caring who saw what I was
wearing!"
"Umm, they weren't sadistic, were they?" came out.
Recalling the circumstances, Jack replied, "If you mean 'was I
whipped or beaten for noncompliance,' no. I didn't get that feeling -
it was more like play. Like they wanted to tell me something in their
own way."
"These girls, do I know any of them?"
"Janice Lawson was the head of the group!"
"Her father was the CEO of Lawson, Thomas and Clarke, Inc. He was
worth several million bucks! I heard she's pretty rich herself."
"What do you mean, was?"
"He and his wife, along with Bill Clarke, were killed in an airplane
crash a few years back. As their only child, Janice stands to inherit
quite a bit of money."
"Damn shame! God, I feel for that poor girl. I lost my parents the
same way. It's rough!"
"Go on with what happened."
Jack took a sip of coffee, continuing: "Well, they played outside
with me as a little girl, later we went inside. There, I was punished
for showing off my frilly undies. They made me lie over a lap, I
think it was Joanne's, my panties were pulled down to my ankles, and
a hairbrush was vigorously applied to my posterior! Actually, I think
several were involved." Pausing for a second to reflect, he mused,
"It does sound worse than it was!"
"In other words, you got a spanking, right?"
"Yeah! I haven't been spanked since, oh, since I was, I guess,
eleven. I gave some friends fruit from our store. That was worse,
definitely."
"Okay, go back to what happened."
"Well, that night they decided to have a slumber party. There were
three other girls added to the group. Now I know what goes on at
girls' slumber parties; I sure didn't get much sleep! At least Janice
gave me a pink Baby Doll that almost fit. You can almost certainly
guess where my mouth was in the morning. I must have changed girls
four times that night. In the morning, Janice woke me up and put me
into a satin French Maid's uniform - felt nice too ..."
"Ahem!" Nancy interrupted. "Didn't that feel very humiliating - I
mean, you're a male, and that's gotta lower your, em, esteem. A
servant rather than one being served."
Jack pondered that statement trying to phrase an appropriate reply.
"I didn't feel that way at the time. Maybe I'm just one of those
submissives. Again, I did control what I cooked, I kinda liked the
way the uniform felt, so it seems to me that there was some trade-
off."
"Trade-off?"
"Yes. Umm, I relaxed. I forgot about midterms, studying, tensions
regarding term papers, all those stresses of school, although I still
wonder how they can do anything in that apparel. It's beyond me!
Janice had me cook and serve breakfast, for ten I think. I've got to
say that was actually fun. I do enjoy cooking; don't get much chance
since I live alone. I really outdid myself. The group did give me
some nice compliments, a few kisses thrown in. Some of the girls
wanted a different kind of service, and I managed to avoid that
embarrassment. There was some discussion as to what they were going
to do to me that day. I wound up getting dressed as a college
student, female of course, and off we went, shopping at the mall."
"Whoa! This 'servicing' you thought of as an embarrassment -- you
mean oral sex with a female? If a girl can do it with a girl, why
couldn't you do it?"
"I've never done it! I just couldn't. I would make a fool of myself!"
"Hon, you really lived a sheltered life. All you need to do was just
say so. I'm sure they would have loved to teach you the 'proper way'
to pleasure a girl. Even so, just showing interest would really get
their attention."
"I really would like to try it. I got to like most of the girls, 'I
feel' they're not a bad bunch to hang out with!"
"Jack, if you don't mind me asking, do you prefer being around
females or males?"
"Females, definitely, positively, most assuredly. Okay, we got up to
the shopping. We went to a place in the mall. Apparently, Janice
knows the owner, or one of the salesgirls, and they had me try on
various outfits, modeling them for the clerks, asking for their
opinion. Some of the clerks saw me in underwear, so they knew I was
not a female. Funny, now that I think of it, they were all very kind
and helpful with their suggestions. I wonder??? Janice brought
several outfits there, so I guess they were happy. We went to a shoe
store where I got to tease a male clerk ..."
"Guess he had some kind of kink going," interjected Nancy.
"Probably. We trooped into another 'junior miss' store, ate in a
crowded restaurant which certainly scared me and, I think, they were
going to get my ears pierced. But, for some reason, Janice changed
her mind."
"Well, I think people would be asking too many questions if you
suddenly had pierced ears. So, what next?"
"Back to the house, a modeling session, in ladies' underwear this
time. Again, more photos. They, the girls -- not Janice -- wanted
something different because I wouldn't 'service' them. There are some
photos with me tied up in various parts of that house, in various
stages of undress. In chairs, in heels and panties, bra, stockings.
In a bed, in a negligee and panties. Well, you get the picture.
Essentially, now that I think of it, they were very careful. I
remember Patti asking if the ropes were too tight or if I was
uncomfortable."
It was at that moment that the intercom buzzed.
"I'd better get that!" Nancy walked over to a receiver on the wall,
removed it and said, "Yes."
"Hello. My name is Janice Lawson. Do you live across from Jack
Roberts? I've been trying to reach him on his phone. Do you know if
he is in?"
Holding her hand over the intercom, she asked, "It's Janice. Do you
want to talk to her? Should I ask her to come up or go away?"
"I don't know. I am still a little mad at her, ... oh, what the
hell! I've got to face this some day. Send her up, if you don't mind."
"Janice, my name is Nancy Saunders. Jack is here, third floor rear."
With that, Nancy buzzed her in.
Nancy looked at him and said, "I'll get more coffee. How does Janice
prefer hers?"
"Light, two sugars," was the immediate reply.
In a few minutes, there was a knock at the door. Jack got up and
opened it, admitting Janice.
"You have no idea how glad I am to see you," Janice said, rather
happily, entering the apartment. "I've got something here for you!"
With that, Janice produced a large bag. "All the Polaroids, photos,
negatives, everything. It's all here."
At that moment, Nancy returned to the room carrying a tray with
coffee cups and some chocolate chip cookies. "I thought we might as
well enjoy some snacks."
"Thank you very much," Janice replied, "Jack, is it alright ..."
"I've already told her what happened, so you can say whatever you
want. Look, Janice. I'm sorry that I said 'Bimbo' to you, but I hated
to see you just getting passing grades when we both know you can do a
lot better. I wanted you to try and show me up, I didn't feel I was
too mean to you."
"Jack," Janice started to speak, stopped, looked from Nancy to Jack
and back, wondering about their relationship. A raised eyebrow in
query got a shaken "no" in reply from Nancy. [Noticing the
interaction, Jack thought of the two as lionesses about to fight over
a miserable scrawny warthog.] Resuming, "Jack, we had a little
meeting when I got back to the house. You're right. We over-reacted
and decided to give all the stuff we had on you back! You were really
nice about everything. I am sure this sounds crazy - maybe a little
sarcastic -- but I would like to think you had a somewhat pleasurable
experience being with us."
Janice opened her handbag, took out a rolled-up sheath of papers.
Handing them to Jack, she stated firmly, "I typed out everything we
did to you, the day we did it, and how you were dressed. A complete
signed confession that you can take to the Dean of Women. I ask that
I be the only one expelled - the others did what I asked of them."
With that, she leaned back, closed her eyes, expecting the worst.
After unrolling the papers, Jack glanced over the details chuckling
a bit here, shaking his head there, nodding agreement at the end.
"Fascinating." Slowly, he tore up the papers, got up to deposit the
scraps in a nearby wastebasket.
Janice felt a palpable relief wash over her, similar to the
purification effect of a summer's storm. She choked up a bit as she
stated, "I don't deserve it and you know it! Jack, I swear this to
you: as God is my witness, I WILL do better! This I promise you - a
GPA of 3.75 or better."
Jack sat there, wondering if he should tell Janice his whole story.
She should know. "Janice, perhaps I should tell you why I was so hard
on you?"
"Sure."
Nancy chimed in with, "I'd like to know, too."
"Okay, here it goes. At one time, I had an older sister, two years
older actually, who was much smarter. My family owned a small store,
selling mostly groceries. A few other things we kept in stock for
certain customers. The family decided that my sister would attend
college. I worked and whatever money I made went into my sister's
school fund. I did all kinds of work. I thought if I could get good
grades, I might get a scholarship. So, I worked for my sister and
studied for myself. There just was no time for any social activities.
When other guys were taking their girls out, I was at the library,
studying. It went quite well, we made enough for my sister, but I
still had to keep my grades up. It was about two weeks after my
sister graduated, and she was to go on to college."
Jack paused for a moment, reliving the bad memory. Maybe this
telling would purge him of the feelings that "She should be here,
going to school, certainly not him." He didn't cry anymore - it was
no use. He used up his quota long ago.
Getting a hold of his emotions, he continued: "She was out with a
girlfriend, shopping for clothes for college, and they were heading
home. Witnesses stated they had legally entered an intersection when
the car they were in was struck, broadside, by an eighteen-wheeler.
The car was demolished, and my sister and her friend were killed
instantly. The truck driver had suffered a massive heart attack, and
he was dead even before the truck struck the car. Most of her college
expenses were used for her funeral. So, that left me. I was able to
get a small scholarship and found enough work to fund my schooling.
Between study and work, there was very little time left for me to
socialize. I managed to do fairly well in school and would graduate.
My folks were to fly in for the commencement ceremony. They never
made it. The commuter plane they were in crashed a mile short of
landing. As I remember, they said it was due to an engine failure. I
dunno. Their insurance kept me in school, and I swore that I would
get a Master's degree in their honor. I got my B.S. for my sister.
So, Janice, I needed money to keep me in school, and here was a
tutoring job that would help. I mean, here you are with all this
opportunity! And what do you do -- you just want to make a passing
grade. God, you are smart, beautiful, you are so like my sister. I
just wanted to do something to make my sister proud of me. Is that so
wrong?"
Janice had a hankie in her hand, dabbing at her eyes. "It reminds me
of my parents." Putting down her coffee she walked over and sat
beside Jack, putting a comforting arm around him. "It's tough - you
never really get over it. You just try to move on."
Nancy was sipping her coffee. She said, "You two really have
something in common."
Jack sat with his head down, trying to make up his mind. "Janice,"
he said softly, "I got a confession to make. I enjoyed being around
you and your friends. I liked the feel of those clothes and your
perfume. I'm sorry. I guess I'm not much of a man, am I!"
Nancy jumped in. "Hell, it makes you more of a man than some of the
childish jerks I've met! Look, sweetheart, I'm a lesbian, but now I
met and chatted with you, well I'm wondering. From grade school to
high school, all the guys were either too this or too that. I've made
my mistakes. You know, the nice guy everyone called a sissy."
Janice looked at him, "Hey, wait a minute. Is that what you think?
That because you enjoyed what we did, you are some kind of 'sissy' or
'swish.' A homo, maybe? Come on now. When you were with us, didn't
you have fun? When you walked into that mall, weren't you afraid
somebody you knew would recognize you, and didn't you face those
fears? I know we played some mean tricks on you, but I didn't hear a
word out of you. You didn't whine, complain or groan. You did what we
asked. How many men do you know would go into a store and model
ladies underwear. You have got to be very secure in your sexuality to
do that. Jack, I didn't think much of you before. I thought, 'here's
one of those macho pricks we can have fun with,' and we did, but you
fooled us. I would like to think we brought out the better part of
you!"
Nancy sat for a second, sipped a bit of her coffee before saying,
"She's right, Jack. Some men have to advertise the fact that they're
a man. Others know and feel no need to prove it!"
"Maybe I should have paid more attention in Psych classes. Hey, it's
getting late, and I'd better get to my apartment. I didn't get too
much sleep for 'obvious' reasons."
"Jack, dear boy," Nancy purred, "why not stay here. There is a good
late night movie with car chases and things blowing up..."
"Whoa," Janice interrupted, "I still didn't get a chance at him.
Jack, in the bottom of that bag there are two matching nighties and
panties. I was thinking of staying ..."
"Are they the lime green ones from that 'junior miss' place?"
"One and the same!"
"Well, if Jack agrees to make breakfasts, my bed is big enough for
three!"
"How about Western omelets?"
[Over the next few months, Jack dated Nancy many times. Janice
applied herself rigorously to studies amazing her professors. Jack,
with Nancy helping, took on ten more to tutor. As he taught, he
learned.
In a small church two blocks from campus, on a beautiful sunny day,
Nancy became Mrs. Jack Roberts - her choice.]
Epilogue
It had been a very lovely Commencement Exercise, with all the caps
and gowns in the colors of the disciplines of the various schools.
In a gathering of the recent graduates, two women, holding hands,
strolled through the quad, oblivious to the comments from some, like
"lessies," and "dykes," choosing to ignore their ignorance.
There was a cry, "Hey, Jackie, Nancy!" Two heads turned as one, as
several females descended on them. Dual and group hugs along with
smooches abounded.
"Janice, you did it! A 3.89 GPA. Cum Laude, yet! I'm so damn proud
of you!"
"I owe you a lot, Jack. So, Nancy, how's married life. Jackie
treating you well?"
"Great!" Nancy's smile said it all.
Janice stood for a moment contemplating her next statement. "My
father's will states that when I graduated from college I was to take
over his company. I do have a need for a Human Relations Vice
President and I've got a big house. It would be very easy to change
one room into a nursery! And Nancy, if you're up to it, there's a
dojo nearby that could use a female sensei."
"Now that sounds interesting!"
Jackie queried, "How did you know?"
"We women have to keep some secrets, don't we?"
Nancy pulled Jackie over and whispered in her ear, "I called her
last night."
Janice smiled, and said, "If you take the 'position,' I'm sure the
two of us could show you a lot more, em, positions."
It was now Jackie's turn to laugh, as she said, "I don't know, I
don't want to be 'tied down' too long!"
Definitely not the end!
Annie O
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