Becoming A Teenage Girl - Pt 3 free porn video

Becoming a Teenage Girl - Pt 3 By Ms Annette Nicole Smith ************************************************************************ Thanks to all of you who have taken the time to read these stories and I have appreciated both the comments and the helpful criticism. I've looked closely at suggestions and where feasible will adopt some of the suggestions made in future chapters starting with this one. This chapter takes place on Boxing Day 1986 when I was 14 years old and occurred after my mother had arranged with her sister to allow me to stay on their farm at Henty (Riverina district of NSW) initially for a period of 2 years learning about how to be a female with the help of her sister and 3 daughters (my cousins). Some minor details have been altered only to protect the privacy of still living people, however with the mists of time covering 25 years since this part of my life happened I may have also forgotten some trivial matters as well. Almost everything in this story actually did happen including the answer I gave to my Aunty as well as the actions I was requested to take during our "girls only" bonding session. ************************************************************************ As the car slowed down to enter the dirt driveway that lead down to the farm, I could see the farm house in the distance and found it was just as I remembered it from my last visit with my brother 12 months previously. The farm itself (which was known as "Swampview," although it did not have any swamp near it as far as I knew) was located about 3 miles south west of town and all you could see from the main bitumen road was wheat standing close to 4 feet in height waiting to be harvested. The farm itself was only a small one of about 700 acres and was a mixed holding, mainly wheat with a small sheep holding of about 400 head. As we pulled up at the large stone built home, I saw a tractor in one of the far off fields. Mum had already opened her car door and gotten out and was standing, staring out over the farm, reliving in her mind earlier childhood spent out here herself. I slid out of the other door and went and picked up one of the suitcases out of the boot and followed after my 3 cousins who also had a case each and were heading for the front door. Mum and her sister Aunty Poss were still near the car with her sister pointing out various things on the farm as they talked animatedly all the while standing side by side with an arm around each other. I followed my cousins into the house as they headed for the big bedroom at the front of the house which my brother and I usually slept in each year we visited. They put down the suitcases on the bedroom floor and Margaret told us that she'd get the kettle going while her sisters set the table for afternoon tea. Margaret suggested to me that my mother and I might like to freshen up after our trip and join them in the dining room after we'd washed up. The smell of baking from the kitchen permeated throughout the house and was an inviting reminder to me that although mum and I had eaten on the train, it was now 4.30 in the afternoon and the smell of cooking food in the air did indeed make me peckish. So I cheerily said words to the effect that I'd tell mum when she came in, and watched the room empty as I began to put one of the cases onto the bed prior to opening it. I heard my mums and aunty Poss' voices coming down the long hallway towards the bedroom talking about things that had taken place over the years since mum had last been hear. Mum entered the bedroom followed by her sister and abruptly stopped in her tracks, looking around the room in silence. "The room's just as I remember it Poss," as she walked towards the door on the side of the room that led onto the veranda which went around the entire farm house and on opening it walked outside. Her sister followed her out and they began talking and pointing out things mum spotted while her sister regaled her of stories about childhood memories that she could still recall. It was as if mum had shed years in age as she gaily prattled on about one memory or another with aunty Poss, before coming back inside. "Margaret's in the kitchen getting afternoon tea ready mum," I told her. "Perhaps you might like to freshen up first?" I suggested. Aunty Poss cried out her apologies reminding mum that she (we) must be exhausted from the train trip and hurried out of the bedroom leaving us alone. "Bag's this bed," my mother said claiming the larger one next to one of the windows. That left me with the slightly smaller one which was where I had put one of my cases already, knowing that mum would prefer the large bed. "Remember where the bathroom is?" I asked mum. "We'd better get ourselves freshened up because I'm certain that afternoon tea's ready by now," as I proffered the way to exit the bedroom with my hand which had my mother walking past me and down the hallway to the bathroom, me following along behind her. Long trip or not, neither of us were going to get changed into something more comfortable as mum, like myself, was too excited about being here and with afternoon tea being ready to bother with a change of clothes yet. We quickly washed our face and hands and checked our faces before heading for the dining room to find my cousins and my aunt already seated around the table and waiting. Margaret was enthusiastically commenting to the others on how realistic I looked as we entered the room and took strategically vacant seats that allowed us not to have to squeeze past anyone. "Dad's not going to be finished till around 5.30," Aunty Poss informed all of us, "so it gives us time to all get reacquainted." And with that she asked mum and I if we preferred milk and sugar while my cousins helped themselves. "What made you want to be a girl," Bernadette blurted out as soon as I had taken a sip from my cup. "Mary Bernadette Hayes," her mother scolded her. "Your guests have only just arrived. At least give them a chance to relax before you start asking 20 questions," which had Bernadette quickly apologizing and sitting in frustrated silence. Bernadette was only a few months older than myself and just like me was always wanting to know the answers to anything she asked immediately. I eased my chair back slightly and turned to face her smiling at all the others before replying. "Bernie, I guess I've always secretly wanted to be a girl for years. It's just that I really didn't know how much I wanted it until a few months ago when everything seemed to come to the surface," I told her. I turned my head to look at everyone around the table. "It's kind of strange to be sitting here like this. I simply know that it feels right to me how you're seeing me at the moment. I know it must seem strange for all of you to see me like this even though you've always known me as Steven and I'm very grateful to all of you, not only for the welcome you all gave me, but for allowing me to stay with you to see if I handle being Stephanie." "I was just saying before you came into the room how realistic you looked as a girl," Margaret said to me. "If I didn't know better, I'd have thought you had always been a girl Steph," I blushed red at that and shyly smiled back at her. "Thanks Margie. You don't know how nervous I was when the train pulled in. I was scared silly you were all going to make fun of me when you first saw me." "I thought that you must have decided not to come Stephanie when our mother pointed out Aunty Margaret to us, standing alone on the platform," Foxy chipped in. "Then a strange girl comes up and kisses mum on the cheek saying hello to her. I have to admit that it took a moment for me to realise who you were and two and two added up, beside the fact a strange pretty girl was wishing me a Merry Xmas!" she smiled happily to me. "Oh yes. Sorry about walking up behind all of you before saying hello," I told her. "Far wiser heads then mine had decided that it might be best for everyone if I just walked up to all of you and simply announced myself instead of standing next to my mum," I informed her. I turned my head and looked at both Mum and Aunty Poss and hopefully conveying my admiration at their plan to introduce Stephanie to them and how successfully it had worked out. "I have to admit that I didn't know who you were when you walked up behind us and spoke either," Bernadette told me. "All I saw was a teenage girl I'd never met before wishing all of us a Merry Xmas and then I realised who you must be." "Well enough questions for now girls," Aunty Poss quietly announced. "Your aunty Margaret and I are going to let all of you get better acquainted and ask as many questions as you like later on after dinner when Aunty Margaret and I will explain what we've decided on for Stephanie's moving in with us in a "girls only," get together." We then sat back to enjoy afternoon tea with mum asking questions about everyone else only to be interrupted when Uncle Bill walked into the room announcing his welcome to both of us before sitting down to take a cup of tea as well. Aunty Poss stood up and remarked how long we'd been gossiping for and told us she'd almost forgotten the stove and hurried out to the kitchen, asking Bernadette to come and give her a hand to get dinner ready. Mum and Uncle Bill were busily catching up with each other as I quietly joined the exodus away from the table. I joined my cousins who seemed to have congregated in the large old fashioned country kitchen although my offers to help were rebuffed in a friendly fashion. I marvelled at how each of my cousins seem to be doing something towards the preparation of the evening meal, so I pardoned myself and left to go to the toilet attached to the side of the house which had been built with it's own wash basin as if it were a suddenly remembered building plan mistake. The summer heat although nearing dusk was noticeable after the coolness of the house, so after I had finished I quickly retreated back inside and stood in the kitchen and asked questions of my cousins as they finished preparing dinner. As the meal preparations were beginning to signify that my aunt and cousins were almost ready to serve, I offered to set the table which had Bernadette offering to assist me setting out the cutlery. We re-entered the dinning room only to find that mum and Uncle Bill had vacated the room. Bernadette and I quickly placed cutlery at each of the chair places when my mother cruised past both of us and went into the kitchen noisily asking if she could help prepare dinner. After being told to sit down in a friendly manner by her sister, mum came back into the dinning room and smilingly suggested to me that we might quickly change out of out good clothes and led me out and back to our bedroom, where we changed into more casual clothing. "After you help clear the table and wash up the plates later on, we're all going to have a girls "bonding," session," mum reminded me as we got changed. I'd taken out a casual light skirt and top to change into. "Uncle Bill's going round to visit one of the other farmers for a bit of chat, so we don't have to worry about embarrassing interruptions." Now with us both changed, we headed back down the long hallway towards the dining room when the words 'dinners ready' were called out. Maureen and Margaret were already in there as Maureen asked mum if she wanted a glass of sherry with her dinner and had poured several glasses already to which my mother agreed to, telling Maureen at the same time that I was a bit too young. Uncle Bill walked in and sat down at the head of the table and Maureen and Margaret sat at different places around the table, as Bernadette walked in carrying a tray balancing several plates of steaming food. She first placed a plate in front of her father, then started to place plates at each table setting as her mother followed her in carrying another tray and set out the remaining plates into empty places, before sitting down and inviting mum to sit beside her, leaving me the only vacant chair on her other side. Meal time here was much more formal than at home and with grace said we began to eat dinner. The girls conversed with their father about his day or about what they had planned for tomorrow, which apparently was a trip to the shops at Wagga. Mum and her sister were quietly talking among themselves and I was answering questions covering my previous 12 months from my cousins and Uncle Bill. It was a real family affair, just the same as any previous time my brother and I had stayed there. We finished dinner and were then presented with desert followed by tea or coffee, before relaxing while conversation continued for about another half hour. The girls were then excused from the table and I got up and followed Bernadette out to the kitchen, while my mother Aunty Poss and her husband remained seated at the table. In the kitchen, without asking I donned an apron and rubber gloves and proceeded to fill the sink with hot water and then dirty plates. Bernadette told me with a smile, that she was glad I was here because usually it was her task to wash the dishes and now she could just dry up instead. I ingested that information and realised that washing up would probably be one of my house chores from now on. While we washed up we discussed things that had happened over the previous 12 months. It was apparent to me that she must have been spoken to about asking me any questions about my change to Stephanie, although she must have been bursting to find out more. Occasionally I'd let slip a fact or two as we washed up and I enjoyed talking to her as she helped with the drying up. Before we had finished, it was clear to me that we were now a lot more comfortable with each other and as my other cousins joined us. From their reactions they soon realised Bernadette and I had stolen a march on them. As the heat from the kitchen stove made me begin to perspire around my face, I began to realise that Bernadette must have had to help with the washing up most of the time and although we had been only two additional places this evening, my mind accepted the fact that even after my mum had returned home, washing up for a family of 6 was going to be a chore I'd quickly begin to dislike as the washing, drying up and putting away had taken about 40 minutes. - good grief! With everything put away, all 4 of us left the kitchen, my cousins leaving for different rooms in the house, as I wondered back into the dinning room to announce that the washing up was done and the kitchen tidied up, to the general thanks of aunty Poss, as Uncle Bill then gave his apologies and got up and disappeared outside. Mum and he sister then stood up and as if by agreement Aunty Poss said she'd see us in about 20 minutes and walked out. Mum looked at me and asked me if I was ready to face what was coming. Smiling back at her, she then suggested we go and get changed into our sleepwear and generally tidy ourselves up, so we walked towards the front bedroom while I noticed Bernadette walk out of the bathroom and Margaret walk into it both saying they'd be up in a few minutes. They were wearing nighties! Mum and I walked into our bedroom and immediately commenced to get changed. I was about to take out my peignoir set, when mum suggested I might prefer to wear one of the new cotton nighties we'd recently brought together. I put the peignoir set back and took out one of the black cases we'd used for storing away purchases made over the last 2 months. I luckily picked the right case and picked out a pale green nightie which had broad shoulder straps and came to round my knees. I was about to take off my bra, when my mother who'd already slipped on a pink cotton nightdress asked me to wait a moment. So I sat on the bed and silently waited as my mother calmly looked at the reflection in the mirror before turning around to face me. "Stephanie, I've planned for tonight with my sister to allow her daughters to ask you anything they want about you. You'll be expected to answer them truthfully and without excuses. They've welcomed you today, but depending on how you behave this evening and the answers you give them, will ultimately decide whether you stay here or not." My face must have registered my horror and perhaps my nerves. Mum hadn't told me about the consequences before. She'd only said that we'd have a girl's night where my cousins could ask me (us) questions about Stephanie. Not about my staying here being dependent on the get together answers I was expected to give. "While I'm going to be beside you tonight and I might answer a question that you feel uncomfortable with, I'm not going to help you otherwise. You wanted the chance to be a girl and you're getting that chance. But this is a final test to see if you can live in a female environment amongst girls every day. Now please strip naked for me," and as I did so, she reached into her purse and took out my small pink harness. "I'm going to put this on you now and when I leave in a few days time, you'll be expected to wear this every day from now on until I let you know that you can take it off and I'm telling you now that you'll probably have to wear it all the time you're living here. Wendy told me that you can wash with it on and she assured me that it's easy and quick to dry. Now step over here and let me put it on you." I walked over and silently stood in front of my mother and I then felt her gentle fingers touching me and watched her as she fumbled about with my testicles and penis as she discovered how to put it onto me. I heard the faint click and carefully tried to stand up straight, feeling the tight restrictiveness around my groin knowing that my genitals were now tightly encased. "It's a bit harder to put on then Wendy had me believe," mum informed me with a smile. "You can put your nightie on now Steph," mum told me. I quickly slid it over my shoulders and was about to put on a clean pair of panties, when my mother stopped me again. "This nightie comes down to your knees," she told me. "It gets very hot here in summer, so it might be better for you to get use to not wear panties to bed in summer except during your period which if memory serves me correctly starts tomorrow," she told me. "A girl only wears panties under her nightwear if it's for modesty Steph," as I quickly inserted a napkin in my panties before pulling them back up to my hips. "Let's go and wash up now, shall we?" as mum walked outside and led me down to the bathroom. I felt awkward with both the panty napkin and the harness restricting me again and subconsciously walked quite tenderly although I wasn't in any pain. Mum made me wash my face clean and pat it dry, before she brushed my hair into place suggesting I only put a small amount of blush on my face, for colour. I carefully took my powder brush out and applied it lightly to my face before changing brushes and adding a light shade of rose dust to my cheeks, all the while my mother carefully watching me. I put the make up compact back inside my toiletry bag and automatically reached for my lipstick. "That won't be necessary tonight Steph," my mother informed me. I felt a bit naked without lippy and I looked at my reflection, not entirely happy with it. Mum obviously saw my reflection and quietly laughed. "You look lovely Steph," and then suggested I go wait in the bedroom for her to return. As I walked up the hallway I heard the sounds of a car disappearing up the dirt driveway. That must be Uncle Bill I thought as I walked back into the bedroom. A few minutes later I heard a muffled knock and voices quietly talking for a few minutes. Mum then opened the door and walked back in and closed it. She seemed to have changed in her demeanour as she walked over and sat down on the bed. Mum then suggested I might like to join her on the bed. Then sounds of far away knocking and doors opening had me thinking to myself about horror movies and squeaking doors. Mum's slipped her hand in mine and gently squeezed it, trying to calm my suddenly fragile nerves, telling me how sorry she was I had to go through this tonight? There was a gentle knock on our door and the voice of aunty Poss. "Can we come in now?" to which my mother informed to do so. Aunty Poss lead the way in followed by all 3 of my cousins. Everyone wore nighties and unlike myself were wearing makeup with lippy. Two of my cousins were carrying chairs. Bernadette and Margaret made themselves comfortable on the opposite bed and Foxy placed the chairs for her mother and her to sit on, which they both did, incidentally blocking the door so that no one could get in or "perhaps," GET OUT. Aunty Poss wasted no time at all and commenced to explain that tonight was a "girls only," night. "Well Stephanie.....I'd better explain what tonight's really about. No doubt your mother told you, but I'd like to tell you what I think it's all about. My sister, your mother, rang me about 4 months ago telling me about your personal habits in wearing girls clothes. She'd mentioned about it a few times previously when she'd written to me, but when she rang me that evening, it was suggesting that you might be serious in wanting to be a girl and that she thought it might be a good idea if you could try living like a girl somewhere far away from where you live now and asked if we might be able to allow you to live with us." "What you might not have known is that she rang me back just after your last birthday and flew up and stayed the following day with us," I DID remember my mum saying that she had to fly to Melbourne on company business and she was back the following day, but thought nothing of it at the time. "While she was here Steph, do you mind it I call you that, pet," to which I smiled and said of course she could. "What you don't know is that she came up here and explained everything about you and your wearing girls clothes and that she'd seen you at a BBQ where you were made up to look a lot older, for a dare your mum told us." "She told all of us that you looked like a girl, acted like one and told her that you actually wanted to be a girl. In fact she was adamant that you really felt like a girl and wanted to be one. "Your mum also told us about the bullying from both your brother and your father and how unhappy you were at times." "I have to tell you quite frankly, that initially I and my daughters, except Foxy were against you coming here to stay. It took your mother showing us photos of you and fair degree of persuasion to even allow us to accept your coming hear today. In fact I have to say to you that neither, Bernadette or I are convinced it would be a good idea for you to stay here and live with us at all. Although I HAVE watched you closely today and admit I can see that you appear to be genuine in your wanting to be a girl my main concern is the best interests of my own family and I can't see how allowing you to live with us dressed as a girl is in our best interests." "Your cousin Margaret seems to have changed her mind about you and told me this afternoon that she now wouldn't object to you living with us, so you might like to remember that this evening," I looked over at Margaret sitting on the opposite bed next to Bernadette and quietly mouthed a THANK YOU which she returned with a smile, which Aunty Poss saw as I turned back to look at her. "But although you've surprised me today not only by the way you look but by how you behave, I'm not convinced at all that I'd want my daughters, especially Bernadette having to live with a young male dressing up in skirts," she told me with a wry smile on her lips. Whatever my mother had told me about coming here to live, was now being very quickly crushed by her sister. Mum silently squeezed my hand offering support, but saying nothing in my defence. I was trying hard not to get upset listening to Aunty Poss talk to me this way. It made me start to think about my desires to live as a girl and how absurd it must appear to everyone including my own mother, who'd obviously tried to humour me by pretending to support me, proving again a mother's love for her children is sacred. Her sister's words though were turning to acid inside of me and making me feel extremely nauseous. "Mum," Bernadette piped up. "I don't need to remind YOU how vehemently I objected to the idea of having Steven come here to live, dressed as a girl. I thought the whole idea preposterous and as late as last night told all of you that I wouldn't be a party to any of this." "Remember how I promised to humiliate him at the station? I would have too if Steph hadn't looked so real and come up and introduced herself the way she did. I've watched her carefully this afternoon and this evening and actually spoken to her when we were washing up mum." "I can't say that I understand how Steven thinks, sorry for saying that name again Stephanie. Anyway, while I can't completely understand Steph's thinking about wanting to live as a female, I have to admit that she looks and acts the part and seems to even sound like a girl. Having talked with her my thinking's changed entirely and so if she wants to be a girl so much and is willing to try living as one, it might be fun to have her living with us." "Margaret's 5 years older than I am and Maureen is 24. It might be kind of fun to have a cousin around my age living with us. I'm now willing to give it a try, although I still don't understand Steph's mind completely," She looked at me with a friendly smile, which I returned in full. "Well thanks for letting me know that Bernadette. But Stephanie, although you might have convinced your most virulent critic to change her mind, it's going to take a damn sight more then that to convince me why either I or my family should run the risk of being ridiculed in the community if you were to be found out. Your mother may be my sister and I love dearly, but it's going to take more than your wearing pretty dresses and make up to justify to me that it's worth the risk to have you staying with us and quite frankly young miss, I can't see that happening! In fact my mind was already made up some time ago and it was only the love for my sister that I even agreed to allow you to come here like this!" I'd listened closely to what Aunty Poss had said. I couldn't disagree with her thinking either. Although I hadn't lived in this area for more than 2 weeks a year, previous holidays had made me realise how close knit the farming communities were. I slowly swallowed and looked directly at Aunty Poss, before asking her if I could leave the room for a moment and wash my hands and clear my thoughts. And with that I stood up pulling my hand from my mothers grip and excusing myself, walked over and opened the door and walked out closing it behind me. I did indeed go to the bathroom and wash my hands, before slowly walking over and looking into one of the girls bedrooms, to see it, smell the female fragrances of various perfumes, before moving up the hall to do the same in the next one, quietly asking myself if it was all worth it, or was I being extremely foolish. Stopping for a moment to collect my thoughts, led me to ask myself if my mother's silence so far this evening meant that she actually agreed with her sister and had needed me to hear it from someone else about how foolish I'd been behaving. Perhaps all the shopping and the nightly mother daughter sessions had been a concession to me and she was waiting for me to come to my senses. I silently asked myself again, as I had so many times recently, "what WAS IT that was driving me to want to try and live like a girl anyway?" I thought that tonight was going to be easier then Aunty Poss hade made it for me. Perhaps it was finding out that of my cousins only Maureen (Foxy) had been willing to accept my being here as a girl initially. Yet I also took strength in that Margaret and even Bernadette were now willing to let my live with them although they had apparently been against it until they actually met me. I thought about my own desires and about the friends I'd left behind. And with that I took a deep breath slowly exhaled, my mind made up. So I headed back up the hallway and gently knocked on the door, waiting for permission to enter before doing so. I was bid entry and slowly turned the handle and opened the door knowing in my own heart that my old school motto was true. "Man IS the maker of his own fortune." Walking in and then turning and closing the door, I briefly noticed that Mum was now sitting where Maureen's had been just across from her sister. Maureen (Foxy) was sitting on the bed next to Bernadette while Margaret was now sitting next to me on the bed where my mum had been. I walked over and sat down next to Margaret smiling at her and giving her my thanks for her change of mind this afternoon. Perhaps it was the fact that my mother had changed seats to be near her sister that suddenly steeled me to speak my mind, as hopeless as it was to do so, but whatever the reason was, I knew that now was the time for me to show the determination that was welling up inside of me even though I'd already been told the decision that I couldn't stay and live here as a girl. "Mum....FABER EST SUAE QUISQUE FORTUNAE! Sorry I don't know the Latin word for woman, so I hope you'll understand and forgive me for what I'm going to do now," There was curious looks on everyone's faces at what I had just said. My mother nodded her head vigorously and was sadly smiling back at me. I looked around the room at everyone and gave them all a sad smile that they couldn't know was a warning. "Aunty Possum," I said looking straight at her. "I must admit to being initially surprised at WHAT you said and HOW you said it to me. I'll have to admit to you that I thought that this evening was initially no more then a question and answer affair which I was and still am willing to under take." She looked back at me curiously perhaps wondering what I was about to say. If she though it was going to be an admission of defeat or a plea for understanding from her, she was going to be disappointed, I'd decided. Well I wasn't going to go silently into the night and perhaps she may have now realised it as well, because she sat up straighter as I addressed her. It was taking all of my courage not to cave in and start babbling incoherently. I took another deep breath and continued on, remembering my debating skill tips. "You're right to point out the possible consequences that you and your family might incur if you allowed me to live here and I was to be found out. In fact I understand you vetoing the idea of me staying here without further discussion. I'm sure that even with all of your daughter's oppositions now appearing to have been reversed it would still be foolish for this plan to continue any further." "I'd like to dearly thank each of my cousins, your daughters for their belief in my desire to want to become a girl and even considering to allow me to possibly stay here. I'm humbled that all 3 of you were willing to finally consider giving me the opportunity to stay here," I said turning and facing each of them in turn and silently mouthing a thank you to each of them. My mother started crying, stood up and apologizing left the room hurriedly. My mother had obviously thought that I was indeed surrendering to common sense and was pulling out of the whole plan she'd thought out in some detail. I was briefly disappointed for a moment she thought I wasn't made of sterner stuff. "But I've sat here and listened to what you've said to me tonight in silence and without interrupting you aunty Possum, and publicly acknowledge that your concerns are certainly well justified. BUT....I feel that you might owe me the courtesy of hearing my side of the story," The room was deathly silent and I paused to take another deep breath and try to think of my next sentence. "Aunty Poss, if I told you I knew WHY I have this urge to live like a girl, I'd have to admit to partly lying to you. While I actually don't know why I feel these urges to be a girl, it's been that way since I was about 3. And although I can't describe it to you, I get a wonderful feeling dressing and acting like I'm a girl." "I HAVE lived with the fear of being found out and being ridiculed by a community so I can understand and accept the reasons for your decision. In fact MY community begins with my brother and father finding out about my feelings and I've lived with that fear for years." "I've already felt the scorn and contempt of my own brother since I told him of my wanting to be a girl and being dressed up when as I am now when I told him. I doubt very much if we'll ever be friendly brothers again. My father had been going to be notified by a solicitor after New Years about my wishes and I have to hope that my brother doesn't say anything before hand to him although he has promised my mother he won't." "Aunty Poss, I've had to play contact sports and gotten hurt all for the sake of pleasing my father and brother in the past. I'm NOT asking you for your sympathy for me doing that though. I AM telling you this because I need you to know how hard I've tried to fit in and please others, enduring occasional pain and criticisms of my skills and courage, just to satisfy the ego of other males." "The happiest times I've had have been playing dress up with my baby sitters daughter, who I think of as my unofficial big sister, and reading girls books and magazines," I took a pause at this moment and another deep breath, marshalling my next sentence, before continuing on. "The excitement each Boxing day of coming out to Henty to live with my 3 girl cousins has always been something I've looked forward to. Taking home fond memories like Foxy's laugh and laughing that way for several weeks afterwards, only to be humiliated into stopping it by my father or my brother telling me to stop laughing like a girl." "For the past few months I've been subject to medical appointments where whatever dignity I had has been ripped away completely as I've had to undergo gynaecological examinations, intimate examinations of my pelvic and anal areas, so many blood samples I feel like a pin cushion and now having my body going through changes I don't entirely understand or comprehend as I take hormones and testosterone blockers in a bid to have my male body change to the of a female," I took a deep breath and decided I was going to get this out of my system tonight once and for all. "Even now, my emotions are as such that I feel I just want to start crying, yet know I can't, because it's been hammered into me not show weakness. Why is it that my mother can burst into tears, yet if I were I do it, I'd probably be looked at with contempt. Aunty Poss?" I said with subdued rage. "I'm sick of trying to live like a male when in my own heart I know I was really born to be a girl, but cruelly robbed of it by 1 extra chromosome." "If you had ANY idea of how much time, effort and thought I've put into coming out here to Henty to live like a girl, you might have at least given me the chance to argue my case. Instead you told me that it could never have happened because of concerns for your family's reputation, which I not only understand but can agree with!" At this point the sound of knocking and my mother turning the handle and coming in announcing it was only her which stopped my verbal flow. I didn't even wait for my mother to sit down before I continued on. "I've been cruelly teased Aunty Poss. Teased into thinking that I might be able to try living as a girl. My own mother has spent countless hours showing me and training me in the finer points of being a woman. I been tempted, by being taught all about make up and how to wear it, being shown and brought lovely dresses and skirts and being allowed to wear them," Another pause and a deep breath... "Having courtesies extended to me by strangers. Watching my mother's enjoyment as she showed my how to behave as a girl and sadly now realising how much of a disappointment it must have been for her not to have had a daughter instead of a son, then on suddenly finding out that she has a quasi daughter, having to willingly give her up." "I've said good bye to friends I've grown up with and most likely will never speak to again and I've done this willingly! I was supposed to sit through an interview with the principal of Culcairn High just to see if she could believe I could be a female in a male body, but that's now gone by the board now that I know where I stand." "If YOU felt I deserved to be teased like I have been Aunty Poss, perhaps you could have found a kinder way of telling me NO. You might tell me that it wasn't teasing, but having now listened to me, I wonder if perhaps you now realise that it was." "If you think that I didn't understand the risks involved in wanting to live as a girl, you'd greatly under estimated my understanding of people in general and biased people in particular," It wasn't as if I allowed aunty Poss to say anything in reply to me. But I sensed a feeling of shame and embarrassment, yet one also of understanding around the room. "Did YOU know that part of that part of the training my mother has made me endure was to wear sanitary napkins like I'm wearing now. She did this to make me understand what a woman has to go through each month and every month until she reaches menopause. I can't begin to understand the pain a woman has to go through each month, but she's made me do it so I can realise the inconvenience and the embarrassment and therefore appreciate women more?" This brought a stifled laugh from my cousins to which I turned to each and smiled. "Perhaps that's why I'm so emotional at the moment?" I told them with a smile as Margaret reached over and gave me a gentle tender hug. "So I ask YOU aunty Poss and I'd expect you to answer me as honestly as you've asked me to answer any of your questions tonight"..... "Do I look and act believably as a girl to you or not? I'll accept your judgment as I've readily but reluctantly accepted your decision about me staying here." There was complete silence in the room as everyone waited for aunty Poss to reply to my question. Maureen was over and hugging my mother. Margaret was hugging me, as I assumed in commiseration. Bernadette was looking at me with tears in her eyes, then at her mother. I had no idea what Aunty Poss was thinking about. Perhaps she's simply anxious as me for all of this to end I thought to myself. "I can honestly admit to you Stephanie that you look and act like most 14 year old girls. You're certainly as outspoken as any other fourteen year old girl, that's for sure," Aunty Poss said to me with a smile. "I'll also admit that I'd already made up my mind about your not staying and that I appreciate you being able to understand my reasons were not personal or biased against you yourself." "I actually told your mother that, a few minutes before we all came in here tonight of my decision," I looked back at her in shock and then at my mother with some embarrassment and understanding for her, as I realised that she had already known the answer yet had made me publicly endure this disappointment tonight anyway. "My husband, told me that he'd leave the final decision with me as to whether you would stay with us or not before he left. He admitted to both your mother and I, while you were washing the dishes, that he was surprised you looked so believable as a girl and so much like photos of your mother, when she was your age. He also told me that he could accept you under this roof until or if your real identity was discovered." "You've been somewhat outspoken this evening and I've been just as courteous in listening to you as you were to me when I was speaking, but I have just one more question to ask of you Stephanie and I'd expect you to answer it as truthfully as you have with my other questions already tonight....." "What makes YOU think you can live like a girl and not be found out at some point in the future? Because if it's discovered who you really are, you must realise you can't stay here. You know that, don't you?" Aunty Poss had asked me the one question that would have been impossible to answer, even if I had not already now known the decision. As the answer no longer mattered, why bother to make promises that couldn't probably be kept I thought to myself. "I'm NOT sure that I CAN live like a teenage girl without being discovered Aunty Poss. I can't promise to be able to do it and I'm realistic enough to tell you that. I admit to not really knowing all the obstacles I may encounter or whether I'll make a mistake or not. I just know that I WANT.....NO, I NEED to try and do this," I told her. "I understood my mum's thinking that I had more chances of succeeding if I lived in a female environment and willing accepted that I might lose more than I gain by doing this." "I've got one thing going for me though Aunty Poss. And it's taken the last few months for me to realise that I had it all along. You see, I've got some unusual breeding in my genes." "Did you know that I've got a lesbian (My Aunty Lillian) on my father's side?" I asked her. "I've also got the Clare bloodline of school teachers and pragmatists, as well as my mothers Stapleton bloodline on the other side as well. I've also inherited my father's insistence on perfection and my own mother's determination and stubbornness. I just have to learn to harness it all, but I'm determined to try to succeed and become a girl Aunty Poss. I DO know THAT!" "Sunshine," she said with a trembling voice as she looked at my mother calling her by her childhood nickname. "You've got a very articulate but outspoken and feisty daughter on your hands and heaven help you trying to raise her. She has the courage of her convictions, which is very rare in someone so young." "It's obvious that she needs to learn a bit of discipline and it's also obvious to ME anyway, and I'm sorry to have to say this to you Sunshine, but you're not the person to do that. However I'M willing to try and do that for you, if you'll let me......" The room erupted in loud squeals of joy. Mum and her sister were hugging and crying with each other. Margaret who was sitting beside me was crying while showering my face in kisses. Bernadette and Foxy were hugging each other and laughing before coming over and joining Margaret in giving me a hug. I eventually struggled free and went over and hugged mum first and then Aunty Poss, whispering to her that I was going to try and make sure I didn't let her trust be wasted. Only for her to tell me that she KNEW I wouldn't let her down if I could avoid doing so. Eventually we all seemed to calm down and I started getting questions thrown at me from all directions by my cousins. Being the centre of attention was not something that I ever wanted, but considering what had just been said and decided upon, had made it that I would be expected to satisfy their curiosity. I waited a few moments and then quietly asked what time it was, to be informed it was 9.15 and having aunty Poss inform us that her husband wouldn't be home for a few hours yet. I took ANOTHER deep breath and tried to remember in my mind and say next what I'd been practicing for a week or more at home of an evening in my bedroom. "I'm still in a bit of shock so I hope I make sense in what I'm about to say to all of you." "Firstly, I genuinely appreciate that you're all willing to allow me the opportunity to stay here and try growing up a girl. I also have to tell all of you that I AM a male, although I AM on heavy oestrogen supplements and testosterone blockers and you're all seeing me dressed as a girl." "I promise that I'll always try and respect your privacy. I will NEVER enter your rooms without knocking and being told I can enter first. I DON'T expect any of you to have to do the same in return. I'll always try and respect your bodies so if I see you in your underwear I'll just turn around and ask you to cover up for me," This was greeted with howls of laughter by everyone except my mother who knew what I was trying to say. "I really can't expect, nor do I expect to receive the same sort of courtesy in return. That doesn't mean that if you knock and enter you'll catch me masturbating or anything like that, I can assure you of that!" which brought with it amused laughter from my cousins. "Mum has explained to me a number of times about how women accept nudity amongst each other and that's something I'll have to remember for school, but never will I accept that under this roof. You're my cousins first and foremost and I want you to know that I'd never try to sneak looks at you in any form of undress. This is YOUR home and YOU have a right to expect to live and behave as you always do, so if any of you are inclined to parade around the house naked or the like, could you please try and warn me first......PLEASE!" "As far as I'm concerned, I've already accepted that if I should ever show my body naked, whether accidently or not, I'd have to willingly accept that I broke Aunty Poss' trust and would expect to be asked to leave," At last my cousins and Aunty Poss were looking at me seriously and how was earnest in what I was saying to them. "I also have to tell all of you, that, at the suggestion of my mother, I'm now wearing a harness around my genitals and am now giving the key to your mother to keep in custody for me. I'll never be unlocked from it unless I should suffer some sort of injury that requires having it removed for any period of time or else for my specialist appointments every 6 weeks or so." "The harness means that I am now unable to achieve an erection, so you're all safe from me in the future!" This brought another hoot of laughter from everyone, including my mother. "Well I'm relieved to know that both my and my daughter's honours will be safe around you," Aunty Poss merrily told me. I smiled back at her and continued on, expecting that I'd humiliate myself if my mother was to mention things that were embarrassing to me, instead of me saying them before she had the opportunity. "I'm also expected to practice monthly menstruation cycles. I have a calendar and I'll stick it on the inside my wardrobe door. If you should ever catch me out not following it, I'd expect you to advise your mother and I'll accept whatever punishment she gives to me. As I said earlier I am presently wearing a napkin although my first day of my current cycle is not until tomorrow." There were a few chuckles at this, but it was Bernadette who asked me if I was joking about what I'd just told them. I looked at my mother who quietly whispered into her sister's ear and got a nod in return. Mum then stood up and as she walked over I stood up off of the bed. She then raised my nightie up above my waist and there for all to see was the prominent bulge of a panty napkin sticking out from the sides of my panties. I stood red faced as she allowed all my cousins to see it before lowering my nightie back down. Foxy asked if I knew the difference between a tampon and a napkin. I told her that I did know the difference as I'd used both and preferred the napkin. This brought a nod of understanding from Foxy and I think the first acceptance by my cousins as to how serious I was about behaving and wanting to be treated as a girl. "Your mother told me about your needing to wear cutlets," Aunty Poss said to me. "I must admit that I didn't understand what she was talking about Steph and I have to ask what she meant," my Aunty Poss piped up with a curious inflection in her tone. I smiled at her and my face started blushing. "I may have my mother's blood in me aunty Poss but unfortunately not all her genes I told them. I'm not very developed up top and so I need to have some help while I'm waiting for mother nature to bless me. Most 14 year old girls would have some sort of bust by now so I'm having to cheat!" I told them with a smile. I then asked Bernadette and Foxy to move off the bed as I lifted one of my cases up onto the bed and opened it. I took out a small box and opened it up and passed it over to Aunty Poss first. She peered into it and started smiling before handing it over to Maureen, who broke up and started laughing with that guinea pig squealing sound of a laugh that she had, as Bernadette grabbed the box from off of her. She took one out looking closely at it and gently squeezed it in fascination. Margaret had rushed over and taken the box and proceeded to take out the other one. Foxy had recovered enough by now to come over and give me a hug apologising for her outburst. "If you need larger cutlets," she told me, "Perhaps dad can get them for you next time we kill a sheep!" which sent her into another fit of laughter and we all joined in with her. As the laughter died down Bernadette remarked, "I'd heard about these things, but I've never seen them before. Were you wearing them when you arrived?" to which I nodded my head. "I can wear them either tucked into my bra I told her or I can glue them to my chest. Usually I prefer to glue them, but it's not recommended I sleep with them on," which had Bernadette remarking "Wow," as she carefully placed the silicon gel piece into the box before handing it back to me as Margaret handed over the other one, before I returned the box to my suitcase. "The drugs that you're taking," Margaret asked, now genuinely interested in learning all about me. "What do they actually do to you?" "Oh that's a tough question for me to answer as I'm pretty bad at science so I might need mum to help me out a bit. The oestrogen tablets are there to increase the female hormone levels in my body. They also affect the fat tissue as well, increasing it in some areas such as the bust and the hips while reducing it in other such as the waist and of course my penis and testicles. The blockers do exactly what their name implies." "I take them to counteract the testosterone and other male hormones my body always wants to produce since I AM a male. At my last medical a few weeks ago my body was breaking even in the hormone department. My next prescription is stronger so that in a few months time I'll actually begin to develop breasts, I HOPE." "My old specialist did tell me that I had a marked change to my hip measurements so that might mean my bum's getting bigger and she told me that my boobs would start to show in about another 3-4 months," I told them to general laughter. "Have you noticed any other changes to your body," Foxy asked swept up in the atmosphere I was creating with my open and honest answers to their questions. "Although the doctor tells me my hips are starting to increase, I haven't noticed it myself. I could still fit in my old school trousers when school just finished. My nipples are getting very tender nowadays and I can't stand facing towards the shower head any more and generally have my back towards the water. They get very tender and sore at times when they rub up against my school shirt. I'm pretty certain that I'm getting more emotional now than I use to. If I see a movie and it's got emotional parts in it, I seem to be tearing up where as before the drugs I probably wouldn't have." "MUM. If we asked Steph do you think she'd allow us to see her nipples," Foxy asked her. Before Aunty Poss could reply, I reminded them about what I had said earlier which I advised them that if I allowed them to see my nipples, I'd have to go back home as per my personal commitment to Aunty Poss. It was mum who stepped in and told me that I'd always planned to answer any questions any of the girls asked me, she reminded me. I confirmed to her that we had BOTH agreed to this in the train, but I reminded her that I'd also declared to everyone here, that I'd accept having to leave if I showed off my naked body even if by accident. Didn't mum remember? "I think that tonight Steph and only just for tonight, It might be an idea to actually show all of us how your body looks," Aunty Poss told me. "For tonight I'll grant you a pardon." I thought about it for a moment and on moving my arms out of the straps I found that I could lower the nightie to around my tummy which I proceeded to do. Margaret who I was sitting beside didn't have to move as I lowered my night dress but everyone except mum stood up and came across to see them. My nipples had swelled up and were clearly prominent surrounded with a dark brown ring of flesh. "May we touch them Steph?" Margaret asked me. I asked them not to under the circumstances, with an embarrassed flush to my face and meekly surrendered to their staring at my nipples, which made them harden even more and my body shivered with a tingling feeling. Aunty Poss was standing on the other side of me and was gently holding my hand as I continued to allow each of my cousins to peer closely at my chest. My body shivered for a moment as I felt a cold chill cross my spine although it was now summer. My nipples appeared to be swelling out far more prominently as I displayed them to my audience while I silently grimaced at the pain from my restricted penis hopelessly trying to become erect at the same time. "Sorry I asked you Steph," Foxy said smiling in sympathy, but all the same peering closely at my nipples. Bernadette also showed no reluctance to come over and peer closely and I had to remind her not to touch them as she began to move hr hands towards my chest area. By now I was visibly shaking, so as they started to sit back down I quickly pulled my nightie back up and put my sleeves back and repositioned the nightie till I was again comfortable. My nipples however were now extremely prominent and could be clearly seen through the thin material. I looked over to my mother and she smiled back at me with a perceptible nod of her head. I asked to be excused for a moment and left the room heading for the bathroom if only so I could try to readjust my harness to reduce my discomfort. I eventually had to take off my panties and put cold water on it, to immediately reduce my frustrated erection. A short time spent drying the harness with a towel and I put my panties back on and pulled them up till they were snug before heading back to the bedroom. I knocked on the door and I heard Bernadette tell me to wait a moment, before she opened the door but asked me to keep my eyes closed as she helped me back inside closing the door behind her. She then told me I could open them and I saw Mum with Aunty Poss standing beside Foxy and Margaret with their arms crossed in front of them. They quickly moved their arms to their sides and I was seeing 4 pairs of breasts staring back at me. I turned my head away only to have my aunty Poss tell me to turn around and look at them as they continued to show me their breasts for about 15 seconds before pulling their nighties back up and covering themselves. Aunty Poss came over and gave me a hug and told me that we were all girls in here and Maureen had felt guilty for asking to see my nipples and causing me so much discomfort "so we're all sorry and hope you'll forgive us," which had me kiss her on the cheek and join in the happy laughter. As we all found our seats or beds to sit back on, Foxy was now sitting beside me and she told me how sorry she was for asking to see my nipples and embarrassing me earlier, She then told me that her mum had suggested to her and Margaret that what was good for the goose was good for the gander too as she hugged me tightly and gave a big noisy kiss on the right cheek. "Stephanie honey," my mother addressed me, letting me know by the words that my bonding night wasn't over yet. "While you were outside, I was asked about your harness thingy and your aunty Poss has agreed to allow your cousins, except Bernadette to see what it looks like, so Steph would you mind taking your panties off one last time for me, please." I was more than reluctant now to do this as I'd earlier given my word and was quite serious when I gave it and told my mother so in no uncertain words! "Come on now Steph," Foxy encouraged me. "You heard your mother, so drop them drawers gal," she told me with a smile and a laugh. I looked desperately over to Aunty Poss who smiled at me and slowly nodded her head to show that she agreed with it. So I slowly stood up and began to pull down my panties and then stepped out of them. At this point Bernadette stood up and left the bedroom, although letting us all know she was still standing outside the door so she could listen. I was about to lift my nightie and decided on requesting a condition first. "Mum I've given my word tonight and already I've had to break it, so what's aunty Poss going to think of my word in the future?" I asked her. "If I'm going to do this I'd like to hear Aunty Poss actually say that I'm not going to be held responsible for breaking my word tonight." Aunty Poss got up and came over and looked me straight in the eye. "Stephanie I know that your word is your bond and what's happened to night will never be held against you by me, or any of your cousins. Your mum told us while you were outside how you had agreed to do this on the train," Which I had agreed to, I silently admitted to myself. "Your mum felt that your cousins and I had to see how sincere you were and your harness is there to remind us how much you want to be treated as a girl. So young lady," she said, as she took the hem of my nightie and pulled it up over my shoulders and head. I stood there with my arms crossed protectively over my chest as first aunty Poss and my mother looked closely at the harness. I knew I was blushing a bright red as my mother explained how it worked to her sister. They gazed at it for about a minute and then Aunty Poss started asking questions to me about the harness. She asked me if it was painful, which I told her that it generally wasn't unless I started to try to become erect. She asked me if it affected me going to the toilet, which I told her tongue in cheek that it only caused me problems if I was foolish enough to stand up going to the toilet! which brought a chuckle from everyone else in the room. She then asked if I had difficulty walking with it on and I told her that I had even gone horse riding wearing it and most of the time was actually unaware I was wearing it. She remarked that I seem to be turning purple down there and I told her that as long as my penis remained flaccid, the colour was usually close to normal skin tones. Aunty Poss began to move away but before she did quietly said to me that I'd shown how much I wanted to be a girl and she was glad I was going to stay with them, which made the humiliation I was feeling ease SO VERY much. I endured my cousins close inspections for about 10 minutes, answering everyone truthfully until my mother finally thanked me and allowed me to get dressed again. Bernadette was then told she could come back in, as I hurriedly put on my panties and pulled them back up and then slipped my nightie back on over my head. My face must have been glowing bright crimson, but a look at my cousins didn't seem to have them blushing or turning their heads away in embarrassment. It was Aunty Poss who asked if anyone had any further things they wanted to know about Stephanie, because after tonight I was never going to be subject to such a vigorous "girls only night," ever again. She then told my cousins that as of right then, the promises which I had made would be strictly enforced but in fairness to me, the girls were also told that if they ever told a soul about me, they'd answer to her and there father, because if any of them let slip about my identity, the whole family would suffer. "Mum, can you ask Stephanie not unpack her bags in the morning until I wake up and join her," Bernadette asked smiling at me as she said it. "I agree," said Margaret. "I'm simply dying to see what clothes Steph and Aunty Marg brought with them. We can get them unpacked and then head for Wagga shops about 11ish," she told us. "Alright girls," Aunty Poss said. "Steph, Breakfast's around 7ish tomorrow, although you'll probably already be up with the daylight," mum and I were informed. All of my cousins came over and wished me and mum a good night's sleep giving each of us a kiss to go with it. And with that the bedroom emptied and mum and I began to get ready for bed. Hugs to all, Stephanie. I've enjoyed my recent vacation and have to return to work on Monday. This storyline WILL continue, but it'll now take much longer to write each chapter. Hugs to all of you. Annette Nicole Smith 8th July 2012.