Married ... With Children: Magic Tricks free porn video

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Bud Bundy brushed back his greasy black hair as he stumbled down the stairs to the living room. It was his birthday. For most teenagers, hell, for most people under 30, birthdays are something to look forward to.

But not for Bud. His dad was usually too cheap to buy him anything. His mom was too lazy and too stupid to bake a cake. And his sister -- well, Kelly usually gave him something, but it was mostly grief.

Then there was this year. This year was going to be different. He had started making his plans months ago, when the idea first came to him. It had taken long preparation. Getting the right materials. Practicing. What was worse, practicing in front of the family, where everyone could see him fail. But that was an essential part of the plan. They had to believe it he was serious. And what better way than to open himself up to even more ridicule than usual?

And now, it was time. Now was the start of things he'd been looking forward to for so long. He smiled to himself as he felt his cock rise a bit in his slacks just at the thought.

It was a weekday, so his dad was at the shoe store, sticking his nose into other people's smelly feet. And his mom was out -- well, wherever it was she went.

But Kelly was home. Kelly was his sister, the kind of young woman for whom the term "slut" was invented. Hell, Kelly was a slut's slut, Bud thought. Always wearing hooker clothes, her boobs sticking out, her cunt wet from one guy's cock and already looking for the next one.

Like now. There she was on the couch, her legs splayed like she was getting it already. Tube top, no bra, her tits bulging out above the elastic, her nipples pressing bumps into the hot pink fabric. Bare stomach, short-short blue spandex mini doing little to conceal the view of her long, shapely legs encased in sparkly red nylons. Fire-engine red pumps with six-inch heels. Lipstick cherry red -- the only cherry she had left. Blond hair billowing out around her head. Bud licked his lips quickly before she noticed him.

"Hey, it's the birthday eunuch," she said brightly, patting the worn-out sofa cushion next to her. "Celebrating another year of your miserable life! Come on, I've got a present for you."

He had to make it look good, so Bud swallowed his glee and gave his face a hang-dog look. "Aw, geez, Kel," he muttered. "Not again. Every year I get all excited and every year you give me some rotten present. Not this year. I'm not gonna do it. So just forget it."

"Why, Bud Bundy," she pouted, her lips forming sultry curves. "I'm hurt. Well, OK, maybe I have been a little hard on you. But not this year. This year I got you something really great!"

Bud did a calculated double-take. "R-really? Something good?"

"Absolutely."

"Well, let me have it!"

She pulled a box sloppily wrapped in tinfoil from under the couch. "Condolences for your loss," it said on the card. He looked at it, then at her. "Well, it was all I could find in the drawer," she said. "Go on, open it."

Bud shredded the foil, uncovering a pale green box marked "Ferguson's Prime Dates."

Puzzled, he pulled it open. The fruit squatted in individual brown paper cups.

"Get it?" Kelly was giggling loudly. "Dates! 'Cause you couldn't get one any other way!" She poked him in the ribs. "Dates!"

"Uh, yeah, funny, Kel," Bud said through gritted teeth. Inside, he was furious, but he couldn't afford to let his anger show. Not yet.

"Oh, wait, there's more," his sister said, pulling out a much smaller package, also done up in wrinkled foil.

More cautiously this time, Bud peeled away the foil. He revealed a package of condoms. He looked up at Kelly.

"To use on your dates!" she shrieked, hugging herself as she sailed off into gales of laughter.

Bud forced a thin smile as he waited out her guffaws. Finally she settled down, although she did erupt in a broad smirk once or twice.

"Thanks, Kel," he said. "That's funny. Condoms for my dates." He slipped the thin package into a hip pocket. I'll need those later, he thought to himself. How sweet of her to provide them.

"Uh, hey, Kel?" She had started to get up off the couch; now she sat back down.

"Yeah, what?"

"Uh, since it's my birthday and all, could you do me a favor?"

She rolled her eyes. "God, Bud, I already gave you two presents. What more do you want?"

"Well, could you -- could you help me with one of my magic tricks?"

His sister groaned. Bud had been tormenting the family with magic tricks, always begging someone to pick a card, hold two ends of a rope, or do something. He'd heard all their jokes -- like, this time, could his trick be to make himself disappear? He'd swallowed it all, biding his time. Now, as Kelly formed her answer, Bud desperately hoped he hadn't gone too far, hadn't driven them all so crazy that she'd never say yes.

"I really should be leaving," Kelly said at last, eyeing the door.

"Aw, please, Kel?" Bud forced himself to whine. "It is my birrrrthday."

His sister shifted away from him. "I really have to..."

Bud switched tactics, hoping to catch her off guard. "I could -- I could make it worth your while."

"You!" Kelly snorted. "What could you do for me?"

"I could tell you at what garage Bill Parker is going to be tonight at seven," Bud said, looking her straight in the eyes.

"Who?" Kelly's voice affected a disinterested tone, but Bud saw the flicker of interest in her eyes. He'd hooked her.

"Bill -- oh, well, if you don't even know him..."

"Parker? Parker?" Kelly feigned a search of her mind. Wouldn't take long, Bud snickered to himself. "Oh, yeah, I think I know him," she said. "Why would I care where he was going to be?"

Bill was a studly football player that, Bud knew, Kelly had been drooling over for months. He had his own set of friends at school, though, and Kelly hadn't been able to break in. Bud knew his sister wouldn't want to pass up a chance to get him alone.

"Oh, I don't know," Bud said aloud. "If you really don't care..."

"No!" Kelly said, quickly. "I mean, well, maybe -- OK. What would I have to do?"

Bud smiled. "Just follow me."

He could barely contain himself as he went up the stairs. It was working! Just a few more minutes and there would be no turning back. He had a brief moment of doubt, but then he thought about what was ahead and, as his cock rose, his fears disappeared.

"Lie down on the bed," he told his sister, pushing open the door to his bedroom.

"Bet you never said that to any other girl," she snickered, but she did as he said, putting her blond head on the pillows. "Now what?"

Bud slipped on the dopey black cape he'd been using to turn himself into Bundini the Magnificent. "I just need a couple of props," he said, rummaging in a dresser drawer.

He pulled out a shiny pair of handcuffs. "I bet you know how these go on, huh, Kel?" He permitted himself that little bit of sarcasm. Kelly, probably thinking about getting Bill Parker, said nothing and allowed Bud to snap the cuffs over her wrists.

Then he slipped a loop of red and black bungie cord over one of her ankles, and repeated the motion with another cord around the other foot.

"You're not going to do anything stupid, are you?" Kelly seemed a little uncertain. "You've got the key to these cuffs, right?"

"Sure, Kel," Bud said, attaching first one cord and then the other to the foot of his bed, pulling her legs apart.

"Good, 'cause -- hey, what is this?" Kelly tried to sit up.

"Haven't you been in this position before?" Bud was moving toward the head of the bed now. "I bet you have."

Kelly's eyes flared. "Just what are you..." Before she could finish the sentence, Bud had grabbed her hands and yanked them up, slipping the cuffs around a hook he'd screwed into the wall. His sister was helpless now. She could move her legs only a little, just enough to bend her knees a few inches.

"Hey, this hurts," she cried, tugging at the cuffs, which dug into her wrists. "Come on, let me go."

Bud said nothing, looking down at her with a widening grin.

"Come on, you twerp," she said sharply. Bud frowned. "I mean, come on, my wonderful magician brother," she tried. "Let me go."

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Chiff's Magic Emporium By Morpheus Dean frowned slightly as he walked along the city sidewalk, thankful that his workday was over but less than pleased by how his day had gone. At 28 years old, and having worked as clerk at the company for five years, he had expected to get the promotion, which had instead gone to the director's second cousin. "Work sucks," Dean frowned, shaking his head. It wasn't fair that his boss could hire some relative, and bring him into the company ahead...

Magic Ink VI the Final OConnellChapter 14

The following new character appears in last few chapters: Makhpia – Luta (Red Cloud) Two Wolves Called Jason, Lakota, Robert's older Brother t, 6'-0'', 200 pounds, 28 years old, jet black hair, gray eyes, a very rugged looking individual and the guardian of the Thunderbird spirit By late on the afternoon of my third day in the wild, I had reached a decision and reviewed it to ensure that all of the necessary points were covered. I was now ready to return to the house and those...

The Magic Flute

Copyright Oggbashan August 2013 The author asserts the moral right to be identified as the author of this work. This is a work of fiction. The events described here are imaginary, the settings and characters are fictitious and are not intended to represent specific places or living persons. ************************************************* ‘Only those with a pure heart can pass safely through the ordeal…’ ‘You’re joking! Who has one of them?’ ‘That’s what I’m supposed to say to...

Magic Ink VII the Fourth RealityChapter 4

Characters returning from Grace and Owen: Grace O’Malley, Heroine, former prostitute, 5’-2’’ tall, 110 pounds, 34D-22-34, 21 years old, alabaster skin, long flaming red hair, bright green eyes, some freckles, very cute, has a large but untrained Talent and little knowledge of Magic Owen O’Connell, Blacksmith, Grace’s lover and soon-to-be Husband, 5’-9’’ tall, 150 pounds, 25 years old, light auburn hair, gray eyes, quite handsome, has a large but untrained Talent and little knowledge of...

Magic Ink VII the Fourth RealityChapter 15

The following new characters make an appearance: Mary Margaret O’Connell (Margie) Katie’s twin Sister, Margie and Robert’s Daughter, Born on the 18 of September 1907, 7 pounds, green eyes, flaming red hair, Siberian Tiger cub Mary Kathleen O’Connell (Katie) Margie’s twin Sister, Margie and Robert’s Daughter, Born on the 18 of September 1907, 7 pounds, green eyes, flaming red hair, baby Dragon Patrick Owen O’Malley O’Connell Grace and Owen’s Son, Born on the 15 of October 1907, 7pounds 8...

A Touch of Magic

Prologue We stood before the tribunal pleading for mercy. We knew it would fall on deaf ears but it was worth a shot. My father and I were facing certain death, we each took huge risks in supporting my wife and mother in their training but it was worth it. My name is Izod Hammel. I am a grand wizard and president of the Wizard's Council. My father is Ozmodias Hammel, a retired wizard who himself was once president of the Wizard's Council. We have spent the better part of four...

Magic Ink IV Ken and KellChapter 21

We had just finished taking our seats and Lady Caoilinn had signaled for the first dish to be served when everything was interrupted by a long, loud, high pitched, agonizing scream that was suddenly cut off. I immediately sent out my Magical senses to determine what had happened. I didn't like what I found. "What on Earth was that?" Lady Caoilinn demanded in the sudden silence that followed the scream being cut off. Captain Sean Og was already on his feet and calling for the guardsmen,...

Dennis The Menace 1 Margarets Magic Words

Dennis the Menace I Created by Hank Ketcham Parodied by Ron Dow75 Margaret?s Magic Words In the part of a once small town that was now a part of suburbia, a small boy in a purple shirt (with a blue O) and black shorts, baggy socks and sneakers ran to play with his friend. "What have you got, Dennis?"Joey MacDonald asked the blonde with the cowlick in the blue-and-black striped shirt, red overalls, and running-and-jumping shoes coming out of his walkway to the...

The Magic Show

The Magic Show by Jordan Holder The conference I'd been attending at the convention center was over, giving me a free evening in Vegas before my plane left the next morning. I'd already decided when planning the trip that there was no point in flying back on the red-eye, which would ruin the day anyway. So I was looking for something to do. Losing money at the casino tables or in the slot machines held no particular attraction for me, but there were plenty of shows...

Why I Hate Magic Parts 13 Revised and Expanded

Why I Hate Magic Chapter 1 Daniel could think of several reasons why he didn't want to go to Dr. Suspendo's Midnight Magic Show. His apartment needed cleaning. Semester finals were coming up and he really should be hitting the books. There was an all-night marathon of Godzilla films playing on television. While any of these excuses would have worked, the real reason Daniel had no interest in watching a magic show had almost entirely to do with the fact that he hated magic. Hate,...

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