Naked in School Homer
- 3 years ago
- 32
- 0
Hey there everyone! My name is Jonas Lots. I hope you’ve been reading about me and my uhhh ... investments ... in A Better Option. It’s an intriguing tale, and one that I think you should read, especially if you’re interested in this tale. It might help you to understand some of the background for the story I want to tell you today. However, I suppose I can try to keep this story as independent as possible.
I can start by telling you that I am 35 years old. I stand at 5’8”, and I’m kinda slim only weighing 130lbs. I have gray eyes, short auburn hair, and a goatee. I only have one living relative, and that is my estranged sister. I hold an Associate’s Degree in computer science. [It was a wasted effort as I knew more about the damned things than most of my professors did.] I then went on to create and grow a network security company of my own. It was so successful that I ended up being bought out by a corporate giant, and I retired as a multi-millionaire at the age of 35.
My current interests, aside from my beloved computers [they are evil, evil machines], is a unique and maybe a little bit shady, investment. You see, I have a homeless family that I am currently funding, and intend to... , well... , take under my wing. To do this though, I would need privacy. I’m currently living in the city, [well near-city suburb]. But it is still a fairly populated area, and as my new pastime would be heavily frowned upon, I would need a very large wall, or at least neighbors that I couldn’t hit with a balled up tissue.
The only other thing I could say about myself is that I am a recluse. I was a reasonably well known hacker. It’s the reason my company made so much money. I won’t tell you my handle, that would bring all kinds of nastiness down on me from both sides of the law. Maybe it’s a bit stereotypical, but I love the privacy of a nice dark room lit only by my computer screen [sigh]. Think Neo in the beginning of The Matrix.
Alright, with the boring bit out of the way, here is my adventure in house hunting...
Thursday, Jul. 6:I had called up a realtor in the town of [redacted]ville. He went by the name of Lawrence Moore. I explained to Mr. Moore that I was in the market for a large house, in the neighborhood of 3 beds, 2.5 baths. But I also explained that privacy was at the top of my list. I also told him that I would need to buy quick, I was hoping to be free to move into my new home within a month.
Somehow, I could hear the dollar signs roll in his eyes. His voice was excited, and from the tone I could just picture some hot shot, grease slicked hair in a cheap suit, sitting with his feet propped on the desk.
“OF COURSE! Of course we can handle that! I have a couple listings that I’m sure would suit your needs perfectly! When would you like to see them?”
“I can plan to be down there on Monday and stay overnight to check out your listings. I have four in particular that I’d like to look at as well.”
“Sure, sure. Just give me their addresses, and I’ll see what I can find out for you. I’m sure I’ll be able to get the ball rolling on something for you.” I could hear a fake smile in his voice that made my neck hairs tremble.
I gave him the addresses, and he told me that he’d have all the information ready for me when I showed up Monday morning. I hung up the phone, and after that call, I needed a shower.
Monday, Jul. 10It was 8AM when I pulled my Chevy Camaro into the realtor’s office. It was a local privately owned place. I always shunned franchises where I could. A wooden sign stood out front reading Prentice Real Estate. As I stepped inside, I was quickly taken in by the warm touch of the decor, the quiet peaceful atmosphere. The place had a nice feel about it. I was quickly greeted by a tall, solidly built man. He was maybe 6’2” and 240 lbs
“Welcome! You must be Mr. Lots. I’m Blake Prentice. Please call me Blake. Len told me that you were coming. I make it a point to greet all of our new customers.” Blake held out his hand. I politely accepted a very firm handshake from him. “My father John Prentice, God rest his soul, founded this company sixty years ago. Now I run it. It’s still a little early. We normally open for normal operations at 9. But I expect Len will be here shortly for your appointment.”
At first glance, I took Blake to be a big tough guy, not to be trifled with. I quickly amended that. I don’t think my first assessment was wrong, but he carried himself with a sense of pride and honor that could only mean...
“Please excuse me if I’m being too personal, but were you by chance military? It’s just the way you carry yourself.”
“Not at all!” He beamed. “I know I can be a bit intimidating. We Prentice men have always been big people. I did indeed serve two tours patrolling along the Berlin Wall with the US Army.”
“You are right about the intimidating. Look at me, I’m a computer geek. When I was growing up, if I saw someone your size, it usually meant that I was going to end up inside a locker. But I was actually referring to the dignity you seem to carry with you.”
Blake was taken aback. He invited me into his office and to have a seat and made us both some coffee while we chatted away. “For a computer geek, as you claim to be, you seem to be able to read people well. To be able to pick out military from the way a person carries themselves is impressive.”
I’m not sure what it was about this man, that I felt I could open myself up so easily to him. But his warmness emanated from him in a way that left me so at ease.
“I’ve always been the quiet loner. I’ve had ample opportunity to sit back and watch people and how they operate. It is a useful skill at times.”
“You know what Mr. Lots? I think I like you. You seem pretty perceptive, and my gut tells me you are a good person. If I had met you earlier, I wish I could be taking you out there myself. As it is, I’m stuck here playing the evil boss role.”
How ironic to find a kindred spirit in this man. “I know what you mean, I sold off my company about a year ago when I tired of being ‘The Man’ instead of one of the workers. So now I get to retire to a quiet life in the woods. That’s what brings me to you.”
“Well, I’ll be happy for the new neighbor. And where is that damned Len at?”
“I’m sorry, you keep saying Len, but I thought my appointment was with a Lawrence?”
“Yes that’s right. He insists we all call him Len, but he advertises under his proper name Lawrence. He says the regal sound of it draws customers or some such hooey. A fucking load of confusing pompousness is what I say, and I’ve told him so. If you’ll excuse my French?” I wasn’t going to bat an eye at a little swearing, and he knew it. I was just surprised that our familiarity had grown fast enough to let himself relax in front of me already.
The door chimed, and when we both looked we could see a harassed looking, mousy haired girl being chatted up by a handsome man.
Blake stood up. “Lawrence! Get in here! You’re LATE!” I was shocked to look and see that it was already 8:30. I had lost half an hour in such a pleasant conversation. “You had an 8 o’clock with Mr Lots here! Now you’d better get a move on.”
Lawrence, or Len, or whatever, stepped in. “I’m sorry, just a few last minute details I’ve been trying to cover with the other agents for today’s viewings, to make sure I had all the information. Hello, I’m Lawrence, but please, call me Len.” He held out a hand to me. I noticed his other hand held evidence of his ‘last minute details’ in the form of a Starbucks cup and a half finished newspaper crossword. I did at least take the proffered hand.
Len was as I had pictured him. Slender built, about my height. He had his blond hair greased back to accentuate his angular face. He was wearing a cheesy sports jacket that probably came off of someone’s discount rack. He had that 80’s sheister vibe, and I didn’t like it. In fact, I couldn’t figure out how he could fit into the homey environment of this company.
Len led me out to a desk in the main office where he pulled a folder out of a drawer, and opened it for us both to look through. “Here is all the information on the listings you wanted to see,” he pulled out three small packets, “and there are a few more of my own listings which I believe you will find comparable.”
What I want to know, if all of the information had been sitting in his desk drawer, then what could he have been trying to find out from other agents? I asked him that.
“Well, you see, it’s just a bunch of housing market stuff, and legalities, and nonsense. You don’t need to worry yourself about any of that.” He tried to put me off with a pearly grin.
I decided to let it go for now, and just get a move on. I wanted to get through the details and hit the road as soon as possible. As it was, it was around 9:30 when Lawrence led me to one of his own listings first. I followed behind, not wanting to ride in the same vehicle as that man. I was worried about grease stains on my clothes. It was a large Victorian residence, and looked like it had been around for a while.
I immediately got out of my car and walked over to his. “No.” I said brooking no argument.
He was startled, but brook he did. He stood up out of his car. “Now as you can see, this is a lovely home. It is in fact superior to the homes you were looking at. It’s got 6 bedrooms and 5 baths. It’s almost 8000 sq feet. And it’s a bargain. The owners are asking $450,000, but I can guarantee they’ll go for 400. You should really come inside and see it.”
I closed my eyes and counted. “First, I am a computer guy. There is no reasonable way for me to network and old Victorian. The walls aren’t built to run wiring. Second, the neighbors are right there.” I pointed to the next lot over which admittedly was about 50 yards away, “I did state that I valued privacy highly. If you look at the houses I asked about, you’ll see that they are all tucked away in the woods. And lastly, even at $400,000, it is still more expensive than the $350,000 asking price of the most expensive one I wanted to look at.”
Len wasn’t too dismayed, and promised I’d like the next one more. He then sat back down into his car and drove me to two more of his own properties. The first one I at least went in with him before deciding that I wasn’t interested. The second house once again had the issue of being too close to the neighbors.
Finally, we then went to view my one of my houses. Only, when we got to the house, there was a woman out front washing the windows. Len and I pulled up into the driveway and Len walked over to me.
“Oh, I’m so sorry, we must have gotten the dates mixed up. Let me handle this.” And without waiting for a response he walked right over to the woman.
The woman who had been watching since we pulled in, stood up to greet Len. Len began his introductions, and it was plain that he was trying to keep it quiet. The only reason that I could see for that, is that he didn’t want me to overhear, seeing as how we were the only three withing shouting distance. The woman just put her hand on her hip and let Len run himself out of breath. When it was her turn to speak, she apparently had no qualms making herself heard however.
“Well I’m sorry Mr. Moore. But I can’t just let you into my house just because you say you are an agent. If you want to see the house, you’ll have to go through my agent just like anyone else. And next time, make an appointment.” She said all of this loud enough to make sure I overheard.
I tipped my non-existent hat, “I’m very sorry madam. There must have been some kind of mix-up between the agencies. We’ll take our leave.” Then looking to Len, “why don’t we go pick up some lunch and we can plan out the rest of the afternoon.”
I didn’t wait for an answer. I just sat down in my car and waited for a defeated looking Len to climb into his car. He led me to a small diner where we both grabbed some lunch. I ordered a burger and coffee, while he ordered some fish and chips [As if he wasn’t greasy enough already.] I stewed over the events of the morning while I ate my burger. I wasn’t happy.
“Mr. Moore,” I decided to use his surname, because I don’t think I could like this man enough to continue on a first name basis, “what happened back there at the last house? If we offended that woman, I may very well not get a shot at one of the houses I was particularly interested in.”
He didn’t even bother swallowing, opting instead to talk around his food. “Oh, well it’s like you said. A mix up between the agencies.” He waved his hand in dismissal as he finally swallowed. “You wouldn’t have been interested in that one in the end anyway. You said that 400 was too high, and with everything tacked on in the end that would have gone over the mark.”
“I didn’t actually say that $400,000 was too high. In I’m willing to pay the 450 that they were asking if it’s the right house. Now, what do you mean, extras?”
This time he stopped and and I could see him picking his words carefully. “Well, you said that you need the sale quickly, so there’s the expediting fee which comes in at a percentage. Then there’s an additional percentage since you’ll be paying mine rate plus the other agent’s rate. Then there would be the background and credit checks to make sure you can really afford the house.” My temperature was rising, and I had to work very hard to not let it show. At last I could see what I had been feeling this whole day. This man was a Grade-A fuckwit of a scam artist. “ ... and when you add it all up, it would come out to be about 68k more than just what’s listed.”
“I see...” I was fighting very hard to control myself. “And how are these additional fees normally handled?”
“Well, normally, you would have one check cut and made out to the seller’s agent to pay the agreed price for the house. Then a second check can be made out to Prentice Real Estate, and we would pay out the taxes and fees from there.”
I pulled out my wallet and set $30 on the table. Then I set my phone on the table as well, and I pressed the stop button.
Lawrence Moore went white. That was the last bit of evidence I needed to see for myself. I walked out and got into my car. I drove as fast as I could over to Prentice Real Estate and was happy to see that there was a small leading behind the building. I parked right next to the dumpster. Maybe we’ll be able to scam the scam-artist.
When I walked in, Blake looked surprised to see me there without Len. He quickly changed his surprise into a jovial grin. “Jonas! Did you get separated from poor Len?”
“Can I speak to you privately?” He could tell from my demeanor that something was wrong.
We went back to his office and took the same seats where. I couldn’t help but think that just this morning the two of us seemed completely lost in such wonderful conversation. I had been happy. That was before Len.
Blake sighed, “It’s Len right? The customers he works with never seem quite satisfied. So, spit it out, what happened.”
So I started by first explaining the three houses that he insisted on showing me and how none of them matched what I had told him previously on the phone. Then I told him about the botched showing of one of the homes that I wanted to see. Blake’s face was growing sour as I relayed my story.
There was a knock on the door. Blake stood.
I quickly whispered, “I’m parked around back. He shouldn’t know that I’m here.”
He walked over to the door and cracked it open. There was some mumbling then, “Give me a minute, I need to wrap something up.”
As Blake was sitting down I hit play on my phone and Blake froze halfway down to his seat. He clearly hadn’t been prepared to hear recorded evidence of Len’s misdeeds. Only when the recording finished did he sit himself down fully in his chair. He closed his eyes, thinking hard. Or maybe he was hurt inside.
When he looked back up at me, there was a quiet desperation in his eyes. “I am deeply sorry about this. I ... Oh lord, help me ... I need to make this right.” He took another second, “if you would be kind enough to agree, I will make sure you get proper treatment. If not by our company, I can hand you over to someone that I trust implicitly. Would you be willing to wait outside in the lobby for a minute though? I think I need to handle this next nastiness sooner rather than later.”
I nodded and stood. When I stepped out into the lobby, Len was standing there, leaned over the desk of same mousy haired girl from this morning. She definitely seemed uncomfortable. I couldn’t blame her. I managed to walk around him and sit down in the front of the lobby without his seeing me. I have no idea what this guy’s issues were. He’d just had a client walk out on him with evidence of his committing a felony, and fifteen minutes later, he’s horning it up over some girl who is was to young for him. I’d be scared shitless if I’d been in his position. Not that I ever would be in his position [I’ve always covered up my tracks.]
“Lawrence Allen Moore! Get your ass in here!” Len stiffened at Blake’s full use of his name, but he stood and walked as coolly as he could into the office and shut the door.
I made a decision, but if I wanted it to work, I would have to work fast. I pulled out my laptop [I never go anywhere without it] and cracked my way into the nearest cellular hub, and began a back-trace on active phones. I put the phone numbers into a table, and with a little more cracking, associated each number with a name. I scrolled through the list, and found Blake Prentice. I then pulled out my phone and sent the audio file to him.
Finding the number wasn’t hard in itself, but to do it over the thundering noise coming from the office? The real challenge was performing my quick hacking while trying to listen to what was being said ... here let me rewind for you.
The door to the office closed. Five seconds later... “WHAT THE HELL WERE YOU THINKING!” [Alright, just assume the rest is Caps locked], “What is this bullshit I hear about you trying to fleece out customers! That is a felony in any state! You’ve been on my shitlist for some time now! The customers never seem happy after one of your sales, and now I know why! I feel humiliated! You’ve disgraced this company, you’ve disgraced me, you’ve disgraced my father’s name!”
It got quiet then. I waited for about two minutes. Then the door opened, “Jonas could you come here please?” It was amazing how he switched from the bellow to such a polite tone.
I stood and walked into the office, choosing to stand this time by Blake’s desk.
Blake kept a calm demeanor, “Len here has just told me that you’ve been making up lies about him. He said you’ve been a difficult customer, and when you weren’t happy with anything at all that you must have made up your story to get rid of him.”
I grinned at Len, “You should have known that your story would fall through with even the slightest check. Blake, check your phone, you should have a message waiting.”
Blake was startled, but he pulled out his phone, and when he opened it, I got to hear Len’s fraud for the third time today. Blake let it play in its entirety.
“Mr. Moore, no more first names. You don’t deserve it. Your father and I are old war buddies, and I took you on only as a favor to him. I do owe him my life after all. So I shall do him one last favor. You will leave this town. I don’t care where, as long as it is not ******ville, and you will stop committing fraud. If you can get your self-centered ass to do that much, I will not turn this recording over to the authorities. I will be telling your father though. Now get your slimy ass out of my office and clear out your desk. You’ve got fifteen minutes to get off the premises.”
Len stood up and glared first at me then at Blake. I rather think Blake wanted Len to say something, but Len had enough sense to cut his losses and walk out. He didn’t even stop at his desk. He just went right out the front door.
“Jonas,” Blake’s voice sounded weary. “Would you be kind enough to close the door?”
I closed the door and took a seat.
“Jonas ... No, Mr Lots. I am deeply sorry. I hope you won’t think too badly of me. I never liked him, but as I said, I owed his father. That’s the only reason I’ve kept him around for as long as I have. Is there anything I can do to convince you to stay?”
“Blake, you don’t need to be so formal. Feel free to call me Jonas. As far as I can tell, you’ve done nothing wrong. So far the only thing I’ve lost, is the half a day I wasted with that slime. In return though, I see an opportunity to cement a friendship in a new town that I don’t know much about.”
Blake’s eyes grew moist as a huge grin spread across his face. “Well said!” He was back to his jovial tone, but he volumed it down as he continued. “I think we can both agree that today is kind of a wash. But I promise, I will pull every favor I can to make sure you get a chance to view your other houses ... By tomorrow if you want.
He became lost in thought for a few seconds. Then he stared at me hard, as if truly trying pass judgment. Then he relaxed. “Alright, you’re a good person. I’m sure of it, and you’ve done me a huge favor in getting rid of the piece of shit. So, I’m gonna do you a favor, I hope. There’s a property I have not yet listed. Now I’ve seen what you’re looking for, and I know your price range. I think this house might actually be of interest for you.
“I guess I’ll just tell you. I’ve got a buddy who runs a construction company. A couple years back, he was commissioned to build a house. Well, it was a really strange arrangement. You see, the buyers first provided the blueprints, and commissioned for him to construct the house. But they had separate companies to do the designing, the surveying, and the excavating. It’s built on and into to side of a mountain you see. It seems a little unusual, almost like compartmentalizing. Well the point is, half the work was done and paid for before my buddy even began construction. Heck even the foundation was already done.
“When the job was finished, the buyers were nowhere to be found. Now my buddy had enough sense to collect half of the commission up front to help offset the costs, but now he had no way of collecting the second half of the commission. So naturally he placed a lien on the house. Well the rough part is that the house, according to him, was appraised to be a million dollar home.”
I choked. “I’m sorry Blake, but I’m really not looking to buy a home for that kind of money.”
“Hear me out ... You remember that I said that all the work was done by separate companies? Well my buddy was the last stop in the construction, and his is the only company whom didn’t get paid in full.
But he’s now stuck paying taxes on the property, and really he just wants to get rid of it. Well, I’ll tell you now that his stake in the building cost was about $600,000 with half of that paid up front. So he’s down 300 for the construction, and another 16 G’s in taxes.
“So here’s where my favor to you comes in. I cannot legally tell you that he will let property go for $350,000, because the house is worth three times that. But I can arrange for someone to take you over to the house tomorrow. I haven’t seen it myself, but I have seen the blueprints, and a few photos. I think you’ll find it to be worth your time.”
I was starting to have trouble taking all this in. In fact it was starting to sound like a sales pitch. To buy myself time to process, I asked, “When you say you’ll ‘arrange for someone’, you mean you don’t want to take me over yourself?”
Blake looked a little abashed. “Well... , I ... uh ... okay I’ll be straight with you. The house is, I’m convinced, exactly what you’re looking for. The photos I’ve seen are phenomenal, and it meets all the requirements you’ve laid out. But I’m kinda trying to resolve another issue I have at the same time.
“You see, that girl you saw out in the lobby. She’s new here, just graduated high school last June. And well she’s a little shy. She hasn’t been able to make any sales yet. I keep telling her that confidence is everything in this business, and she just needs to speak up a little. I can tell that she’ll do just fine someday ... If she would stop acting like a scared little mouse.
“I can see that you know what you want, and that when you find the right home, it won’t take much selling. I’m hoping that you could break her cherry, and that maybe it will boost her confidence a little.”
“And you’re sure I can trust her? I’m not making any accusations, but at this point I know I can trust you. Aside from that, I’ve had enough shenanigans for one day.”
“I give you my word. If you’re not 100% satisfied with her, I’ll buy your home for you out of my own pocket. I’m that sure.”
At my nod, Blake stood and came around his desk. He cracked the door open and called out, “Amelia, would you come here, dear.”
Blake returned and stood behind his seat, while Amelia came and stood just inside the the office door. I stood as she entered the room.
“Jonas, this is Amelia Prentice, my daughter. Amelia, Mr. Lots.”
“Please, Jonas.” Then something clicked into place, and I burst out laughing.
When they both looked at me a little shocked, and Blake maybe even a little upset, I had to explain, “Well if she’s Amelia Prentice, then Blake, that would make her your ‘A Prentice’” And I had to let out one more chuckle. It took them a both a second, then Blake let out a huge guffaw while Amelia went red and bowed her head in embarrassment, but there was a little smile there as well.
Once Blake caught his breath, he began, “Amelia, Mr. Lots- Jonas here, wants to buy a home. Unfortunately, Mr Moore, who is now no longer with this company, tried to scam Jonas out of quite a lot of money. Now, Jonas has very kindly agreed to give us a second chance, and I want you to help him find his new home. I know you can be trusted to treat him well. I’ve given him my word on that, and you know what that means.”
Amelia’s eyes got big and round, “Yes daddy.”
“Amelia, what did I tell you about when we’re in the office?”
She looked down in embarrassment, “I mean, yes sir, -er, Blake.”
“Close enough, I guess. Here...” He rummaged through a drawer and extracted a folder which he handed to Amelia. “I want you to start by showing him this home tomorrow morning. He also has three other homes he wants to try to view, you’ll find...” he opened up another folder already sitting on his desk and picked out a couple packets of paper, “ ... yes, these three are the ones he wants to look at.” He handed her the sheets.
Amelia blanched when she looked down, “umm, Blake? If he wants to buy a house this, ummm, nice, shouldn’t he be talking to Jackie, or Ste-”
Blake stood up and cut her off, “Nonsense, I want you to do it. It’s time for you to learn how to make a sale. Show a little backbone. You need to step up and do whatever it takes to show you are committed to the customer. If you can do that, the rest is spelled out for you in those packets you’re holding.”
She barely managed to whisper. “I’ll get right on it.” And she left the office.
Blake sighed and shook his head, “That girl ... Maybe I was a little too strict in raising her. She never really came out of her shell. But I will at least see her make her way in this job, even if I have to drag her through her paces. But let’s not sweat that for now, I’ll make the arrangements, and do you have a number I can reach you at with viewing times?”
We spent about five minutes rounding out the conversation and I left with a hearty handshake.
Before he released my hand, Blake made one more request. “I know I’ve asked a lot of you already, but just last thing, please? If you do decide on a house, at least make Amelia earn it a little. She needs broken in on this sale, not a free pass.”
I really did have a good feeling about Blake and his daughter. So I agreed. Then I spent the rest of my day checking into a small hotel and grabbing a steak dinner at a nearby restaurant. Blake did call me in the middle of my dinner to set up my appointment for 9AM the next day [I thought I’d get to sleep in more now that I’m retired, oh well.]
Tuesday, Jul. 11I arrived at Prentice Real Estate about ten minutes early. I walked in the door and Amelia jumped up a little too hastily. She knocked over a stack of paperwork that scattered everywhere as it fell.
She gave me a very flustered greeting, “Oh- Good morning Mr. Lots ... Oh dear.”
She started scrambling to pick up all the paperwork. Blake had been right yesterday, Amelia was a scared little mouse, accentuated by her light brown hair and small pointed nose on her round face.
I bent down and placed my hand over hers to calm her down. “My name is Jonas, you are free to use it. And you can relax, I’m not going to bite.”
I gave her a grin then began helping her pick up the papers.
“Right.” She said as she stood up and tapped the papers to straighten them out. “Would you, umm like to sit and look over the information I have, or, uh, would you like to go see the houses now?”
“I know most of the information on three of the houses already, why don’t we just head out and see them.”
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=== Homesick === by Trismegistus Shandy This story is released under a Creative Commons Attribution- Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License. ----- We'd all gone to see the new _Tombs of Atuan_ movie, Mom and Dad and Kiara and me. On the way home, we chatted about the movie and got into an argument about whether they'd gotten Ged and Tenar's relationship right. Those were the last normal moments of our lives. Then Dad turned into our subdivision -- still normal --...
"Elisabeth, can you come into my office at once, please?" Elisabeth Manning looked up from her computer screen, surprised at the somber tone in Willard Aldredge's voice. He was usually a pretty unemotional sort of a boss, the kind of steady going and rather dull bureaucrat to be found in any government department in Washington. Then again, Elisabeth would have had to use much the same words to describe her own life; steady and dull. But something or someone had obviously got Willard fired up...
Group SexSouth of Bikini Episode 7 "Homeworld" 0800 hours, Ni'ihau, Hawaii, May 8th, 1944 "Good morning, Empress." "Good morning, Corrine." "'Morning, Empress." "Good morning, Jamie." "Good morning, Empress." "Hi, Tish." "Good morning, Empress." "Hi, already! Oh, et too, Alex?" Allie seemed a little upset this morning as I approached on an intercept. We were both on course for breakfast. As usual, the...
John sat on one of the sofas in the Officers’ Lounge, with his feet up on the coffee table, and Alyssa and Calara cuddled up beside him. The other girls were spread out on the adjacent sofas, and they watched the colourful expanse of Maliri Space drift by, through the long windows that flanked the room. “John...” Dana said tentatively, looking over at him from the other sofa, her beautiful face burning with curiosity. “It’s nearly time for bed, have you got something planned for...
It is a beautiful autumn day a week before the big game with the homecoming dance afterward.Rebecca is a freshman at this college who is cute as a button but, oh, so shy. She is five feet tall with long red hair and bright green eyes. She is curvy and could stop traffic if she really wanted to. But she dresses for comfort not to impress anyone. There are enough other girls that dress to get attention.She has decided to go ahead and invest in a sexy off the shoulder red dress for Homecoming. She...
Love StoriesCHAPTER 1 Barbara Thompson came close to panic as she read the email from her daughter on the eve of Nikki’s homecoming after spending the last two years in England finishing her Fine Arts Degree at great expense. Barbara and husband Bass (Basil) had used the money set aside to buy another commercial property in their town of Lynch to ensure their eldest received the education she desired. The email read: ‘Hi mom, my degree with honors is in the bag and I’ll be home in two weeks. I have...
Katie Jackson counted out loud as she crunched her stomach, “49,” as she exhaled and laid back onto the floor only to return as she strained her tight stomach, “50.” She breathed heavily as sweat ran down her face. She breathed deeply again and exhaled past her lips. She glanced at the clock on the wall and knew she needed to get ready to go downtown. As with her workouts recently she ultimately ended up unbelievably horny. She had used her sex toys nonstop in hopes of supressing her desires....
Before Homer by Tigger (c) 1997 It was dark in the old man's library sanctum, but then, it always was when the young man did his secret research. He had waited until the old man had taken to his bed chamber, and then waited some more for the drugged wine to take effect. The last thing he wanted was for the old man to catch him poring over the ancient tomes in the old man's library - tomes that had been old when Atlantis had sunk beneath the bright blue waters of the...
“That’s crazy. Let’s just stay watch the game. We’re going to get caught.” “No, we’re not. And even if we are, what are they going to do? It’s about two years too late to expel us. And it’s not like they’re not going to call the cops. After all we’re alums. Potential donors.” Clara was right, although that attitude came naturally to her. Although she came from an enormously wealthy family, she was not in the least snobby or stuck up. It was impossible, however, for her to be unaware of how her...
Horny. Unbelievably horny is how she felt as Katherine Jackson sat at the table with the other members of Mothers against Drunk Drivers. The meeting had gone on longer than expected as she looked at the darkness outside. She had texted Mrs. Lee to stay with her children until she finished. They had been such good neighbors since Fred was away by helping out with their children or tending to the lawn. However her libido was killing her. She had avoided seeing Tommy for the past few weeks. She...
My neighbour was looking for a cleaner over the summer while she worked away and, being young, around eighteen, I jumped at the opportunity to help. I needed a job to help fund me through college and this seemed like a convenient option, being that I lived right next door.On my first day, I arrived early in some baggy jeans and an old sweater, my neighbour Carla, showed where everything was, handed me a list of chores and waved goodbye as she left for work. I got started cleaning the bathrooms...
Quickie Sexby BrettJ © 2010 Timothy Tate was waiting impatiently at the airport for his daughter’s plane to arrive. He was feeling mixed emotions about seeing her again. Eagerness to see Tanya, happiness about her moving back home and anger over the circumstances that had led to her return. Tanya had moved to California with her fianc? years ago, over her parent’s strenuous objections. Neither Timothy nor his wife Aneta had liked Carlos very much. Their daughter Paris put it succinctly. “He’s...
Most college students go home every chance they get. They long for the comfort of home, the home cooked meals, and the memories of good times. Me on the other hand, I would prefer my college life in sunny Florida over a week spent in South Carolina during Christmas. I have no reason to go home. There is nothing there for me anymore. There is a reason I left my home in the first place. As much as I hated to go home for the holidays, my parents made a good point. If I didn’t spend my Christmas...
1993-94: Homeback Confidential Not much sex in the first part of this story. Much more feelings than fuckings, as this is an account of my return home after Operation ‘Restore Hope’ in Somalia. It was the moment in which I experienced the strongest feelings ever, the real turning point in my life. The story starts in October 1993 in the burning desert of central Somalia, and ends after New Years Eve in the cold and wet Dutch winter. We were close to the end of our turn of Mission. 76th Mech...
It was a hot day, and the opening day for my brother’s baseball league. Just what I enjoy more, on hot sunny days is watching baseball. All the players are in there tight pants, with tall athletic tan bodies. Not a single one of the players are ugly on my brothers team but one player stood out to me. Like any other normal hot day I wore tiny tight shorts and a tank top, hoping to get a little color early this year. I was sitting in my chair relaxing watching the game when I noticed one of the...
There is something about that striped blouse and dark skirt together that makes me want to do things to you. Bad things. Real bad things. You come home from work in that combo and I can’t believe how fast I’ve gotten hard. Now it’s your turn to submit. No mercy! You walk toward me with a slightly tired looking smile of greeting and I say ‘Stop. Get down on all fours. NOW!’ You look a little taken aback but you obey immediately. A deal is a deal and you always keep your word. ‘Crawl to me –...
Ashley unlocked the door to her apartment, and reached for the light switch as she stepped through. Before her hand made contact with the switch, her arm was grabbed and she was roughly pulled inside and she felt her other arm being wrapped behind her. Before she could scream out an alarm, her mouth was taped, her eyes blindfolded and she was half dragged, half walked forward…but by who…and why…what did they want? She felt herself struggle, but realized it was useless. With trepidation Ashley...
You live in the modern day world! There are no flying cars or dragons, no, simply look out your window if you want to imagine what the lay of the land is for this story. One key note and important distinction: your universe has been altered for some reason! Women are more prevalent than men, splitting it 70% to 30% and in your high school specifically the ratio is more like 80% to 20%! What a strange plot devi- I mean, “phenomenon”… You are 18 years old and attend the local public high school....
Mind Control"Hey, are we there yet?" I feel like I've asked that question a hundred times since the trip began, my parents are dropping me of at my brothers house for a week. The last time I saw him was a couple years ago, he moved away from us to study and got a job soon after. I must have been 11 when he left, he was 17, we were never really that close but something is making me really excited for this visit, my 18th birthday was just a month ago so he is 24 years old now, I wonder if he has a...
BDSMThe house was a beautiful old-fashioned timber two-storey place with a huge block of land surrounded by trees on three sides. When Frank and Michelle first saw the house, they both agreed it was a bargain for the price it was on the market for. It was in very good condition, quite clean, and surprisingly well insulated. The real-estate agent told them that all the windows were double-glazed, and the previous owner had been supposedly obsessed about quiet. Despite the old-fashioned external...
Mind Control(Author's note: thank you all for favoriting this story! If you like this one, my other story that I've written, with some help, is called "The Casting Couch" and is in the Erotic Couplings section. If any of you want to add chapters or a different branch, go for it. I only keep this story as "moderated" so that I can proofread what you've written. As for the content of this story: all characters are over the age of 18. Any content that is similar to real life events is merely coincidence.) My...
IncestAs you come into our house, you enter by the entrance way that is about three yards long. Looking to the right is a hallway with a bedroom on each side and a 3/4 bath at the end. As you walk into the living room, you look across the room and there is a futon with two large, curtained windows behind it, on the left, there is a short couch facing the futon with a coffee table between them.We placed the small couch there to give separation between the living room and the kitchen-dining room to the...
ExhibitionismWie schon des öfteren erklärt, ist er beruflich oft unterwegs. Wir sind sehr ehrlich zu einander und leben unsere Sexfantasien gemeinsam aus! Wenn er wieder einmal für paar Tage nicht da ist, telefonieren wir abends und machen uns geil. Dabei mache ich es mir selbst bis es mir kommt, er ist dabei einfach so heiß und weiß genau was ich hören will. Aber, er spart sich immer für mich auf und macht es sich nicht selbst. Er braucht es „echt“ und will mir jeden Tropfen seiner geilheit geben! Also...
I had been away at college for several weeks, so I was looking forward to getting home and seeing my mum and dad again. It had been my first term away, and really the first time I had been away for any length of time, so I had missed them both, especially my Dad with whom I had always been very close, and with whom I felt I had always had an especially close relationship.I'd spoken to them both many times on the phone of course, and we had kept in touch by Skype, but I was still almost...
A middle-aged woman wearing a black and blue sari stepped out of the house with her little daughter and small baggage. It was very early in the morning. The sun had not come up yet. She seemed to be in a hurry as she pulled on her daughter every time she felt drowsy. “This is our only option. We must be there on time,” said Champa as she walked to the bus depot. When she was close she heard the roaring of bus seeming about to leave. The moment she saw the bus accelerate she ran for it leaving...
IncestHi, I am Jai and this story which I am going to narrate is a real-life incident, which happened in my friends’ life. I have narrated it as he explained it to me. Just sit back, relax and enjoy while shagging your dick. I even gotta see some encounters after my friend explained this experience. It’s a long story and I will try to make it as interesting as possible. I am a good looking, 5’8 tall and have a 6-inch strong dick; I work out regularly which helps me go really long sessions on the bed....
IncestOn the Friday of Faye's third week of absence from the lab, our boss sent me round to check on her. There's only so long you can play the "bit of a bug" card before it becomes taking the piss.When I rang her bell and waited, I didn't think she was going to answer. It even crossed my mind that she might have bagged a sneaky last-minute flight to somewhere decidedly warmer than dreary old Scotland and had been phoning in her "still not better, I'm afraids" from a poolside somewhere gloriously...
Ashley unlocked the door to her apartment, and reached for the light switch as she stepped through. Before her hand made contact with the switch, her arm was grabbed and she was roughly pulled inside and she felt her other arm being wrapped behind her. Before she could scream out an alarm, her mouth was taped, her eyes blindfolded and she was half dragged, half walked forward...but by who...and why...what did they want? She felt herself struggle, but realized it was useless. With trepidation...
ReluctanceIt was a hot day, and the opening day for my brother's baseball league. Just what I enjoy more, on hot sunny days is watching baseball. All the players are in there tight pants, with tall athletic tan bodies. Not a single one of the players are ugly on my brothers team but one player stood out to me. Like any other normal hot day I wore tiny tight shorts and a tank top, hoping to get a little color early this year. I was sitting in my chair relaxing watching the game when I noticed one of the...
ExhibitionismHomeschooled Synopsis: When his mother pulls Mickey out of high school and enrolls him in a home schoolers group, he develops close bonds with, and identifies with the other seven members of the group - except that most of them are girls and that leads to Mickey being feminized and then ultimately to regressing to an infant. 8th Grade - The year I was in eighth grade in middle school was the worst year of my life. That was the year that my father died. In four months he went from...
There is something about that striped blouse and dark skirt together that makes me want to do things to you. Bad things. Real bad things. You come home from work in that combo and I can't believe how fast I've gotten hard. Now it's your turn to submit. No mercy! You walk toward me with a slightly tired looking smile of greeting and I say "Stop. Get down on all fours. NOW!" You look a little taken aback but you obey immediately. A deal is a deal and you always keep your word. "Crawl to me -...
=== Wanderer and Homebody === by Trismegistus Shandy This story is set, with Morpheus's kind permission, in his Twisted universe. It is a sequel to my earlier story "Twisted Throwback," but though it contains some characters from that story, I think it stands alone pretty well. Thanks to Morpheus for his feedback on the rough draft. This story is released under a Creative Commons Attribution-Noncommercial-Share Alike 3.0 United States License. You may repost it on other sites,...
Young 'Lady' Gina's homeschooling I was still called George when I moved in with my slightly excentric aunt Celia almost two yeas ago, after my mother had a serious nervous breakdown due to my lecherous oger of a father leaving us. For some reason aunty, after walking in on me wearing her prettiest undies and high heels, had taken up encouraging (and accomodating) my little transvestite affectation to the full. Aunty sorta found it a delightfull and classy foible and decided that she...
?The Patanican Alliance consists of 3 planets, Planet Whiteside, Thordaw and Kadir ?The Patriarch Alliance consists of 3 planets, Planet Whiteside, Thordaw and Kadir. All 3 planets were lost during the Great Retreat of 7816 and were taken over by the Walien Theocracy. The aliens withdrew in 7950?the 3 planets (like most of the other planets in the Outer Rims) decided to declare independence.???????????????????????????????????????????????? The Outer Planets, the Lost Terran Empire...
It was a happy homecoming party. Steve had returned home after four years of traveling the less explored parts of the world. As a talented writer and photographer, he’d paid expenses by doing articles for magazines and other publications. He’d become a bit of a local celebrity. Plus, it was his twenty fifth birthday. He was tanned, buff, and even better looking than when he had left. After the buffet some music was started in his parent’s back yard and the dancing began. As...
Sandy was a homewrecker, and she got to the point of enjoying it. She didn't start out that way. She was fresh out of high school and got seduced by a slightly older man. He spent money on her, took her to nice places, treated her like a queen, and in return, she treated him as her king. She believed every word about his failing marriage and how he was getting divorced soon. She even helped him keep their relationship on the down-low because of how it might affect his divorce. She was...
SeductionHey everybody, long time reader, first time poster. I couldn't get this story out of my head the past few weeks so I decided to put it to (digital) paper. Please feel free to leave a review, or you can contact me at [email protected] if you'd prefer. The usual caveats apply, and please don't repost this without permission. Thanks for reading! _________________________ Small Towns and Homecomings By Akira Marx Where was that line from, "You can never go home again?" Maybe it...
All through school, almost every night since I was fifteen, I went on dates. But I seldom dated anyone more than three times. I decided very early in life that I would not get hooked on anyone who couldn't give me the life that I had planned for myself. Now don't get me wrong, like any healthy girl I like boys. No, the truth is I loved boys. There was this boy who asked me out and he took me to see "Sleepless in Seattle". After the movie he took me up to ';Make-out Mountain', and that...
"Oh, Eric, could you put a light bulb in the changing cabana while you're here? Remember, it was dark the other night?" It was Saturday and David was watching a game on TV. I stepped into the cabana, following his cute little butt in a red pair of trunks. "Maybe we shouldn't put a bulb in ... it was so much fun, eh?" I giggled. "This one is OK, it was just loose." He grinned at me knowingly. "Oh, really? That's an idea. Just leave it un-screwed, then." My meaning brought a smile,...
Climbing out of her car Maria gave a slight groan as the pain in her legs reminded her of the fucking she had just received. Her blouse is tied around her waste, all the buttons having been ripped off. Reaching into the car for her purse she saw the cum stains on the leather interior; wiping it up with her fingers she sucked the cum juices off of them smiling to herself. "Good to the last drop", she giggles and heads into the house, her high heels clicking on the pavement. Giggling again as...
It was a happy homecoming party. Steve had returned home after four years of traveling the less explored parts of the world. As a talented writer and photographer, he’d paid expenses by doing articles for magazines and other publications. He’d become a bit of a local celebrity. Plus, it was his twenty-fifth birthday. He was tanned, buff, and even better looking than when he had left. After the buffet dinner some music started in his parent’s back yard and the dancing began. As the plentiful...
Luurat’s troops had stormed the old Estrella compound, but could not prevent its destruction. The explosion that destroyed the hastily installed foreign technology. Luurat wasted no time thinking about the Tomradi troops lost. That old set of buildings provided him with a convenient field post, where he had placed himself on the undamaged throne of the emperor. The Tomradi had a close connection to Avondur for many thousand years. This world was unique. The Ancient Gate Network focused on...
Over the next few days, the Borealans split off into small groups, each choosing a location for their log cabins, clustered vaguely around the longhouse. They used similar methods as they had used to build the original structure, albeit the going was much faster on such a smaller scale. There seemed to be no real organization, the Borealans milled about, helping where they felt it was appropriate. It wasn’t uncommon to see one member of the pack working on a log wall in the morning, only to...
A weary Mickey McKellar tried not to make a sound as he stepped into his familiar entry hall, but the clink of his keys in the bowl by the door sounded like the gong of a church bell to him in his current hyper-aware state. He glanced down at his stained slacks; his cock was straining against the material – still! – after more sex in this day than he’d ever had in any previous week, or month. His undershorts were long gone, probably left in the back room of the doughnut shop. He would have...
Dee Johns found her home at the end of a washboard gravel road four miles northwest of Winthrop. "A place to settle down," she said. They were at Wolf Creek where it emerges from a deep canyon that cuts between the north end of Thompson Ridge and the south end of Virginian Ridge, the western wall of the upper valley. It was a sweltering 100-mile drive northeast along the Columbia River, then north along the Methow River, following sharper and narrower bends, climbing and winding, crossing...
August, 1986 Agent Killian warned us that the people in New York had been talking to the people in Washington, D. C. for the last two years, plotting to kill me. This meant that we were switched from a flight from Syracuse to Dulles to a flight from Buffalo to Baltimore-Washington International Airport. A Sergeant in a Lincoln Continental waited for us at the curb outside of baggage claim with a sign saying "Alexandra and Sgt.-Maj. McKiernan" in medium-sized letters. He nodded respectfully...
Reddit HomeMadeXXX, aka r/HomeMadeXXX! Why is amateur porn the best type of porn out there? Hell, I don’t know. Maybe it’s because it’s raw, unedited and not produced by a guy behind the camera who’s waving instructions at the girls like a spastic aircraft marshaller. Imagine you’re viewing a particularly sexy triple-A production and your dick is rock hard, then imagine that instead of looking into your eyes, the girl is actually seeing some suit-wearing yahoo waving stroking instructions at...
Reddit NSFW ListLooking for real amateur porn movies at Home Movies Tube? We’ve all had that moment when we got absolutely bored with high production porn and wanted an amateur sex tube. Well, at least I’ve had that moment. When I look at it, sometimes I feel like it’s just too fake for me to enjoy it at all. That’s where sites like HomeMoviesTube.com come into play and I get to enjoy thousands of user-submitted porn videos that are genuine and made by authentic people rather than those skanky pornstars, all...
Amateur Porn SitesHome Grown Freaks! If this is the first time you are hearing about Homegrown Freaks, it is a free community of people who share a similar love for ball bursting amateur porn uploaded by slutty members. Even better; not only do you get to see everyone else’s collection, but you can also upload your own and show the world just how depraved you can be if given the opportunity. There are plenty of things to love about this porn destination and being the ultimate nerd; I’m the best placed to tell...
Black Porn SitesLove Home Porn? I know I do. What’s not to love about amateur porn? Well, let me rephrase that—what’s not to love about amateur porn done well? Obviously, there is a fuck ton of amateur porn out there that really puts an emphasis on the “amateur” part of it. I’m talking about shaky cameras, shitty recording quality, 10 or 15-second video lengths. I mean, seriously, who the fuck records a video of 10 seconds of them fucking someone from behind in which you can maybe see the girl’s ass for like 2...
Premium Amateur Porn SitesFellas, let's talk about boobs. Melons, puppies, lady lumps, jugs, or whatever the fuck you call them. There is no denying that every grown man loves the sight of boobs. Why are fellas so obsessed with this specific part of the female physique? Well, I think the better question would be, why the hell not? I mean, if for nothing else, titties are sexual and aesthetically pleasing. Look away now, my gay readers. Y'all can go check out the gay content on mygaysites.com. See? The Porn Dude has...
Reddit NSFW ListWhat’s your Stay Home POV? If you’re like a lot of motherfuckers, you’ve spent the last year or so working from home or just watching TV all day. It’s been shitty if you’re used to going out, doing things, or interacting with other humans, but hey, at least we’ve all had a lot of extra time for whacking off. I’m sure you know that as well as I do, otherwise you wouldn’t be here and you wouldn’t have the ol’ Fleshlight all lubed up, dripping on the carpet and ruining your security deposit.Do you...
Premium POV Porn SitesOur Home 2 sure has an innocuous name, doesn’t it? It’s so sparkly clean that you’d never guess there was anything pervy going on over there if you weren’t reading about it on a site like ThePornDude. Hell, even after spotting the babe on her knees in the site’s logo, all that intro text about “hobbying” threw me for a loop. Maybe it’s a product of the site’s age, founded more than a decade ago. Most of the other websites I review in this category refer to the practice in more explicit terms;...
Escort SitesDid you grow up in a Taboo Home? If so, well, perhaps you should talk about it with your therapist. For most of us, it’s just a fap fantasy, and what a popular fantasy it is! While web searches for the topic have gone up in recent years, incest has been a common and titillating element in storytelling since the dawn of written history. Admit it: the only part of the Oedipus myth you really remember is the part where he bangs his mom! Make what you will about those enduring Greek themes of drama...
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