Sideshow Bob s Revenge
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The woman who won the 15-18 division was a very attractive redhead who was clearly the class of the group. Robin and I were both clapping when they announced that she'd won. The 12-15 division was a tossup; I liked the woman who won, Robin liked the other woman. And then it was Connie's group. She did look good in her bikini, I'll give her that. And she had learned how to give a blow job. And she gave her handler an awesome ride during the compulsories.
"Fuck," Robin said, even before they'd announced the results.
"Oh, come on, what fun what it be if somebody else beat her?" I teased her as we sat together watching the rest of the contestants.
"And what fun will it be if she — " Robin began, stopping immediately when she caught my glare. "I know — have fun, have faith."
That was what I'd been preaching ever since we arrived.
"Kind of odd learning about faith from you, though," she smiled at me.
I smiled back. All I knew was something was going right.
The Friday after the state show, I was walking back from my last class of the afternoon, hoping against hope that I had time to get a couple books out of my room before the blue rubber band went up. It was a late afternoon class, and I didn't always get back in time to get some books out for the evening. This time, though, I didn't have a problem with the rubber band itself; my stupidly-promised, albeit very effective, two-month celibacy was over. And I'd received a short e-mail from Robin, scheduling a "practice session" for a fancy nearby hotel on Saturday evening. So I was finally going to get laid myself. Even if it was by my best friend's mom.
There was a group of guys gathered outside the door to the dorm, and as I approached, they all stepped backward. One grabbed the door handle and pulled it open for me.
"Enter, highness," he said with a bow.
I had no earthly idea who he was, other than a guy on the next hall over from mine, so I just thanked him and went in. Along the way, four other guys briefly bowed their heads and muttered things like "your Majesty" or "your highness." Maybe they'd been at the show. You'd think college guys would be a little more, I don't know, adult about this. I mean, it's not like I won a Nobel Prize. Hell, I hadn't even won the MILF Show, for Pete's sake. The guys in high school had just high-fived me after I'd won the Nationals.
Finally, I saw Alec coming toward me. He gave me a much more sweeping bow, along with a "your Majesty."
"What the fuck's going on?" I said, stopping in front of him.
"The goddess awaits," he answered with a grin. "The men of Corcoran Dorm have decided that you must be the prince of legend, and we salute you accordingly."
He bowed again.
"What are you talking about?" I insisted.
"The girl? In your room?" he chuckled.
"There's a girl in my room every fucking Friday afternoon," I complained. "I think it's starting to permanently affect my spine."
"Those are The Chipster's girls," he said knowingly.
"Yeah, no shit," I said.
"Seriously, man," he said, "I was in there talking to Chipper earlier this afternoon, trying to help him understand the offense — which is, like, well, never mind. Anyway, there's this knock on the door, and he opens it up, and there's this goddess there, with a bunch of guys trailing behind her like the dust behind that Road Runner dude. And Chipper just stands there, with his mouth opening and closing and no sound coming out.
"So I lean around him and ask if I can help her. And she says, 'Is this Kenny Winston's room?' And I said, yeah, and she asks if you're there, and I say no, you're not, but you should be back soon. So she says, 'May I wait for him, please?' And by now Chipper's found his voice and he croaks out, 'Gay-bo? You wanna wait for Gay-bo?' And she smiles — God, what a gorgeous smile — and says, 'If Gay-bo is Kenny, yes, may I wait for him, please?'
"And then, get this, Chipper says, 'I gotta get dressed first, honey, but if you wanna sit there and watch me, I ain't gonna stop you.' And she says, 'that's okay, I brought a book.' And she sits down on your bed, opens her purse and pulls out a book, and just starts reading.
"So then — this killed me, dude — she's just sittin' there, readin' this book, and Chipper decides he needs to change his shorts. He's standin' there bare-assed, and finally he can't take it anymore. So he turns around and says, 'you sure you don't want any of this, honey?' You'd think he would have known better after that tape, huh? So she looks up from the book at him, looks down at his dick, and gets this little smirk on her face, looks back at him with one of those little raised eyebrow things, and then just goes back to readin'. So Chipper starts mutterin' to himself and pullin' on his clothes and we finally head for the door."
Another "your Majesty" went by, tugging on his forelock as he bowed his head.
"And just before we get there, she says, without looking up, 'those rubber bands on the door knob, I assume one is for you and one is for Kenny?' Chipper is, like, speechless, so I tell her which is which and she lifts her head up and looks Chipper in the eye and says, 'be a sweetie and put the red one on the door on your way out, please, honey.' I nearly bust a gut laughin', man. Chipper just stalks off down the hall, and I'm standin' outside your door holdin' my sides."
"So there's a girl in my room, right now?" I asked.
He blinked his eyes, looking at me like I'd turned a different color.
"There's a fucking goddess in your room," he put a hand on my shoulder. "The honor of the dorm is at stake. The honor of Handley College is at stake."
"Is she foreign?" I asked. "Is the honor of America at stake?"
He clapped me on the arm.
"Man, all I can say is that if she was in my room, I wouldn't be out here talkin' to no wiseass asshole like you."
I nodded.
"Good point. See you, Alec."
I approached the room with some trepidation. True, there was the red rubber band on the door knob. And true, she was supposed to be gorgeous. But still, suppose she was some sort of stalker or something? Suppose she went around from one MILF show to the next, selecting her next victim?
Aw, who the fuck was I kidding? I put my key in the door and pushed it open.
She wasn't reading now. Hell, she wasn't dressed now. Terry Kennedy was sitting on my bed wearing nothing but a smile. I closed the door quickly behind me.
"Terry?" I asked, even though it was quite obviously her.
"Kenny," she said softly.
"What are you doing here?" I asked.
"Waiting for you," she told me.
"Because?"
"Because you're going to make love to my mom this weekend, aren't you?"
"Well, I don't know if 'making love' is right," I ran a hand through my hair. "I guess I'm going to fuck her, though. We have to practice for the —"
"Kenny, I know you," she smiled indulgently. "You can't fuck anyone without making love to her. But she can't have you until I do."
I just kind of blinked at her.
"But you're a — I mean, this could really hurt you," I finally said. "I'm kind of big for your first time."
"I've been practicing," she said. She had a purse by the side of the bed, amid her pile of clothes, and she reached down and pulled out the dildo that I'd had made for her mother. Without taking her eyes off of me, she opened her mouth and took the whole thing down her throat without batting an eyelash.
"Mmmm," she moaned, slowly pulling it out and planting a kiss on the tip before she reached down and just as slowly pushed it into the slit between her thighs.
"Mmmm," she moaned again. "Oh God, Kenny." She was looking at me through half-lidded eyes.
I thought my cock had been hard before. Now it was trying to tear a hole in my jeans. Still, the big head had one last argument.
"But I thought you were saving your — you know, saving it for marriage."
Her laughter was like bells.
"That could be, like, months," she said. "I decided just to save it for the guy I want to marry."
That took a second or two to process.
"You want to marry me?" I asked.
Her face lit up. She pulled the dildo out and tossed it onto the floor.
"Why, yes, Kenny, what a sweet proposal," she said. "I'd love to marry you. Now come to bed and let's find out what I've gotten myself into."
The big head shut itself down. I tore off my shoes, my jeans, my socks, my shorts, and my shirt, and dove head first into her waiting arms. It would be just the first of many places I ended up diving that night. Sometimes head first, sometimes not.
I woke up first the next morning, just staring down at the beautiful goddess lying on my shoulder as sunlight flooded the room. Finally she woke up, too, and looked up at me with bright, smiling blue eyes.
"I owe you an apology," she said.
"No, no, no," I insisted. "You were great. That was — it was amazing. I can't believe it was your first time."
"I owe you an apology for last weekend," she said.
Oh. I couldn't help it. I started laughing. And Terry, bless her heart, started laughing right along with me.
"Okay," I said after we finally stopped. "Let me take you out to breakfast and you can tell me what happened."
Terry borrowed a bathrobe and trooped upstairs to the women's hallway to take her shower. She came back to tell me how much she liked the women I was going to school with. And how impressed they were when she told them about my success at the show. And how cowed they were when she mentioned that if they made one move toward me while she was back at school, before her transfer came through, she'd come back and rip their hair out, one strand at a time.
On the way out, I saw Chip sleeping in the first floor lounge, his feet hanging uncomfortably off the end of the couch. I opened the door.
"Yo, dude," I yelled.
"Huh?" he woke up slowly.
"Room's all yours, honey."
Terry and I took our seats in the cafeteria with our trays of food.
"So?" I asked.
"Well, obviously you were right about the money," she started. "But you know that. I talked to Dad, and he couldn't believe that she had borrowed the money from you. I told him that I couldn't believe that he had used up all the money they'd saved for Wally's and my college. So then he said that he couldn't believe that Mom was here, at a disgusting exhibition like this."
She started to giggle.
"And then Mrs. Becker came by? Our minister's wife? And told us that she thought it was so great that we were there supporting Mom. She said she wished more husbands were this supportive. And then she just smiled at us and walked off.
"And Dad was kind of, like, shell-shocked. He just sat there, like he couldn't decide what was happening. And I told him that he probably still hadn't noticed how good she looked, had he? And that if he did one thing — just one thing — to prevent Mom from doing this, from trying to educate her kids, from being able to eat something other than macaroni and cheese when she was by herself, which by the way she better ever not be again anyway, I told him, I wouldn't speak to him again for the rest of his life. And that shut him up pretty much completely. He kind of wandered off and I never saw him again."
Dottie
- 04.03.2021
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