Androids of Evergreen pt3 Athena
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And A HalfChapter 3: The Green Man free porn video
By Saturday night, I had decided my life wasn’t worth living. I couldn’t overtly commit suicide: that would devastate my parents. Instead I decided to make an ‘accident’ happen. I’d read about a man who nearly killed himself by drinking a bottle of Scotch. At my local supermarket I found that they had a special offer on a brand of Irish whiskey I’d never heard of before. Scotch, Irish, what difference would it make? If one bottle wasn’t enough to kill, I needed at least two. Hell, why take chances? I bought five. It wasn’t as though I would need the money any more. The cashier was extremely suspicious and I had to prove I was over twenty one before she’d let me buy even a single bottle.
I made my way to a quiet spot by the side of the river. If alcohol poisoning didn’t kill me, surely I’d get so drunk I’d fall in and drown.
I opened the first bottle and took a swig. I nearly choked as the amber liquid burned its way down my throat. There was no hurry, I had all night, so I waited until the burning died down before I took a second, smaller sip. It went down a lot more easily.
As I continued to sip the whiskey, it started to rain. As it soaked through my clothing, chilling me, the whiskey kept me warm from inside. It occurred to me that if the whiskey and the river didn’t kill me, perhaps I’d die of pneumonia. I giggled at the thought, then took another sip.
I was perhaps halfway down the first bottle when I realised I wasn’t alone. There was a little green man sitting next to me.
“Are you a Martian?” I asked.
“With an accent like this?” he answered, in a rich Irish brogue. “Care to share a drop of that whiskey?”
I had five bottles. I expected two would be enough to kill me. I could certainly spare some for my erstwhile companion. I handed him the bottle and he took a swig.
“Thank you kindly,” he said, “that’s fine stuff. Reminds me of my home country.”
He passed the bottle back and I took another swig.
“Tell me,” he said, “what’s a fine young man like yourself doing out here all alone on a night like this?”
“But I’m not alone, you’re here with me, my friend.”
“And I’ll stay as long as you keep sharing that fine whiskey. And perhaps you’ll share your story too.”
“I’m here to kill myself.”
“And why would you want to do that?” he replied, holding out his hand for the whiskey bottle.
And so I found myself spilling my guts to a complete stranger, how the doctors had said there was nothing they could do for my little problem, how I’d been repeatedly humiliated, how I’d sworn never to let it happen again until I had gone out with Claire. As I rambled on and on, we finished the bottle and I opened another one. Then we finished the second and I opened a third. Funny, I didn’t seem to be getting any more drunk despite the quantity of whiskey I was consuming.
“What would you wish for, that would improve your life?” he asked when I finished taking and opened the fourth bottle.
“Easy. A normal-sized penis.”
“I don’t think that’s possible,” said the green man, taking the bottle from me and gulping down another mouthful.
He handed back the bottle and I took a swig.
“‘Tis a tricky one. Let me think,” said the green man, taking his turn with the bottle.
We sat there in companionable silence as he thought. The rain fell persistently but I didn’t feel cold enough to shiver. And I didn’t feel really drunk. The fourth bottle empty, we started the fifth. The sky began to lighten: dawn was approaching. When we reached the last dregs of the fifth bottle it was my turn, but for some reason I handed it back to the green man.
“Thank you kindly,” he said, draining the bottle. “It’s been a pleasure sharing a drink with a gentleman such as yourself.”
The rain stopped as the sun crept over the horizon, and I was suddenly blinded by a rainbow spectrum of light. I shook my head. When my vision cleared, I found myself at home in bed. It had all been a dream. I turned over and went back to sleep. I couldn’t be bothered to get up. What was the point, I had nothing to live for.
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