Good Medicine Senior YearChapter 56 Holy Week and Pascha Part I
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May 17, 1985, McKinley, Ohio
“Last day!” Clarissa exclaimed when she came to my room on Friday morning before breakfast.
“If you think I’m going to ‘Carrousel’ because my life clock has gone red eight years early, Jessica 6, you’re nuts!” I declared.
“I thought that was a foregone conclusion, Logan 5!”
“Well, yeah!” I chuckled. “You’re my friend, so that does call your sanity into question!”
“Can you believe it’s been four years?”
“No. There never really was a time when it felt like the days were dragging by, and looking back, it seems as if time has flown by!”
“So true. Shall we get breakfast? The entire gang is assembling, even the lazy bums who don’t have their first class until 11:00am!”
We left my room to head to the cafeteria.
“Some people are in love with sleep,” I replied. “Something we future doctors know is silly!”
“Have you always been a morning person?”
“Pretty much. It gave me more hours in the day when I had an early curfew or early bedtime or there were evening church services. When I was living at home, I’d get the newspaper and do the chess puzzle before breakfast. It was a good way to start the day.”
“How exciting!” Clarissa declared sarcastically.
“Well, sex wasn’t really an option as a teenager!” I chuckled.
“Nor for the last ten months or so!”
“The difference was in High School it was for lack of opportunity!”
“Nobody really hit on you once you started seeing Elizaveta regularly.”
“No, but it was fairly obvious which girls would have been more than happy to keep me warm at night if I wanted.”
“Including a certain professor!”
“That was a warm bath and glass of white wine!”
“I have to say that is the one thing I’m sorry didn’t happen. I would have LOVED the conversation with you the day after!”
“What? Nuclear annihilation?” I asked with a smirk, referencing a TV show from a few years earlier.
“The reactions to that movie in the dorm were interesting.”
“The network forced the producers of The Day After to cut the most graphic stuff,” I replied. “All because the network censors were afraid people might be disturbed! Well, Golly Gee Wilikers, maybe people SHOULD be disturbed by the thought of nuclear war! I’m not about to surrender to the Soviets, but nuclear war would have exactly zero winners and effectively infinite losers! Sadly, we can’t un-invent the things.”
“So, no Red Dawn for you? Got it!” Clarissa replied with a laugh. “But that’s the most political thing I think I’ve heard you say.”
“What politics?” I asked. “The idea of a ‘winnable’ nuclear war is the very definition of insanity and anyone who thinks that a nuclear war could be ‘won’ needs to be locked up in an asylum! In fact, that’s a good way for us to safely use up the supply of psychoactive drugs! Maybe, just maybe, something will come of President Reagan’s START proposal and we can start putting the «djinn» back in the bottle! Sadly, it’ll never go all the way back in, but any nuclear weapon taken out of service is a win for the world. And now I’ve said my piece. Let’s go in and eat!”
We joined the extended gang for breakfast, spreading out across a second table from our usual one. Given exam schedules, this was probably the last time we’d all eat together as students. It was bittersweet, but necessary, as it was time to continue to the next stage of our journey. The person I was going to miss the most was Clark, and I hoped he was going to be both happy and successful in Chicago.
“We set a date,” Fran announced. “Well, my mom did, anyway!”
“And you’re eloping to Vegas the week before?” Sandy asked.
“We should,” Fran said, shaking her head. “But no. July 27th.”
“Where?”
“Wapakoneta. I did talk her out of a minister so we’ll just have a judge do the ceremony. The reception is at a park. And it’s casual.”
“Sounds like you did some serious negotiating!” Sophia said.
“More like threatening to do exactly what Sandy suggested!”
“The timing will be tricky for Elizaveta and me,” I said. “My ordination is that Sunday, and we absolutely have to be at Vespers.”
“The wedding is at noon and we’ll understand if you can’t stay for the entire reception. We plan to come to your ordination. We’ll leave for Vancouver on Monday.”
“Pete, did you guys find an apartment?” Clark asked.
“Last weekend,” he said. “It’s in that complex just south of the hospital. We figured it was better to be closer to the medical school than to Taft. We’ll move in when we come back from Europe.”
When we finished breakfast, we all headed back to the dorms, and Clarissa, Sandy, and I gathered our books for our last day of classes at William Howard Taft. In our Abnormal Psych class, we handed in our papers, filled out a course evaluation, and then were dismissed early. We took the opportunity to have coffee in the Student Union, then headed to our Physical chemistry class where we had our last in-class review before the comprehensive final exam we’d take on Monday afternoon.
We had lunch with a smaller group, then headed to our stats class which was another review session for a comprehensive exam we’d take on Tuesday morning, and then ended our four years at Taft in Doctor Blahnik’s classroom for Russian Literature. We handed in our papers and had a lively discussion about the themes and philosophies of the Russian authors we’d studied, and then at 2:50pm on May 17th, we left the classroom having completed our undergraduate studies. All that remained were two exams, and then it was on to graduation.
“Mike? Clarissa?” Doctor Blahnik called out from behind us.
We turned and walked back to her.
“If you two aren’t doing anything tonight, come to the house for dinner. Bring Elizaveta and Abby.”
“We had planned to go out tonight,” I said. “But I think dinner at your house sounds wonderful. The only caveat is that we were having dinner with Mark and Alyssa.”
“They’re welcome, if that doesn’t mess up your plans.”
“It doesn’t,” I replied. “Lissa?”
“We’d love to!”
“Then I’ll see you later. Dinner is at 7:00pm; arrive any time after 5:30pm.”
“Thanks, Doctor Blahnik,” I replied.
“You’re welcome!”
We turned around and walked back to where Sandy was waiting for us.
“Teacher’s pets!” she teased.
“Don’t look at me!” Clarissa exclaimed. “I was just along for the ride! Mike is Doctor Blahnik’s pet student!”
“I’m not even in the music department,” I protested.
“That didn’t seem to matter for her!” Sandy said. “Not to mention her REAL desire!”
I chuckled, “Elizaveta made sure that didn’t happen!”
“As did your promise to Lara!” Clarissa replied.
“Yes, but that was only intended to be in force until we figured it out. And given her concerns about living under a microscope as the wife of a deacon, it probably could have worked out in Doctor Blahnik’s favor.”
“Talk about a complete change! When I first met you, even the idea that Doctor Blahnik was interested would have freaked you out! Now you’re implying you would have done it!”
“He’s not implying anything!” Sandy declared. “He’s saying he would have banged her like a drum!”
“No, I’d have enjoyed a nice warm bath, a glass of wine, and some very enjoyable lovemaking,” I replied.
“Uh-huh!” Sandy smirked.
“You were quite clear which YOU preferred!” Clarissa declared with a smirk. “Not everyone likes the same thing!”
“Oh, shut up!” Sandy ordered, but she was laughing.
Kristin had liked slow dances; Sandy, on the other hand, had usually preferred ‘stress relief’, which was anything but a slow dance!
“Are you going to get Elizaveta right away?” Clarissa asked.
“No. I planned to pick her up at 5:30pm, so I’ll just stick with that. Music?”
“Absolutely!”
“I’ll leave you two to the music,” Sandy announced. “I’m going to go find Pete so we can get an early start on the weekend!”
When we arrived back at the dorm, Clarissa put her books in her room while I called Mark to let him know that he and Alyssa should meet us at Doctor Blahnik’s house. Clarissa came in just as I hung up and sat down on the couch. I put on Brothers in Arms by Dire Straits, then sat down next to Clarissa. She moved very close, so our knees, hips and shoulders touched, the closest we could come to cuddling without crossing any lines which might upset Elizaveta.
“Any idea why the short notice on dinner?” Clarissa asked.
I shrugged, “No, but you know Doctor Blahnik. She can be fairly spontaneous.”
“May I ask a completely inappropriate question?”
“Right, because you’ve never done THAT before without asking!”
“The rules have changed.”
I shook my head, “No, they haven’t, with the exception of whatever privacy Elizaveta needs.”
“Do you regret not waiting until after school is out to get engaged?”
“As enticing is that might be, I’m not sure there’s any way it could have ever happened. Without the celibacy pledge, I’d have ended up disqualifying myself from ordination, and I’d have missed out on finding the girl who is my perfect ‘partner in crime’, given you had to take yourself off the table.”
“I thought you didn’t want to be a deacon!”
“But the bishop wants me to, and I would have failed him if I couldn’t get that part of my life under control. Lara was instrumental in that, and I owe her a debt of gratitude on behalf of the bishop, Father Nicholas, my grandfather, the Parish Council, and myself.”
“And Elizaveta!”
“I thought that went without saying from the ‘partner in crime’ comment!”
“And it wasn’t the table I took myself from!” Clarissa said. “It was the bed. I just couldn’t.”
“I know and I understand. We both knew that was the likely outcome of our experiment. And I’m glad we did, because it ensures no regrets and no ‘what might have beens’.”
“I was afraid, at least for a time, that I had hurt you.”
I smiled, “We love each other far too much for that to have happened! We talked about it at length and took each step in a considered way. Now, if you asked me if I hoped it might turn out differently, the answer is ‘yes’, and I believe that would be your answer as well.”
“It would.”
“And yet, you absolutely had to be true to yourself. Anything else would have ended in disaster. So, here we are, best friends, colleagues, and former lovers, with a special, lifelong bond. To me, that is the best outcome we could have reasonably hoped for.”
“Setting aside what was pure fantasy, the way you did with Tasha?”
I chuckled, “I believe I actually lived that fantasy for several months! And I VERY much enjoyed it!”
“Between you and me, and invoking my ‘Lissa’ privilege, was she the best?”
I was about to contradict myself, because on further thinking about it, I had been wrong about Jocelyn, though I wouldn’t change what I’d told her. There was something very special about Jocelyn because she was first, and because of ‘Mik and Jos’, but one person transcended Jocelyn.
I shook my head, “No. That was you, Lissa, because of what it meant and what we meant to each other. Tasha and I love each other, but not the same way I love you, and neither of those is the same as I love and will love Elizaveta.”
“But come on, the sex between us wasn’t THAT good!”
“Emotionally it sure was,” I countered. “And in the end, that’s what really counts. It’s not about number of orgasms, or how pleasurable those orgasms are. Sure, I like them, but in the end, it’s the closeness that matters more than anything.”
“Your feminine side coming through again?”
“If you want to call it that, yes. Do you remember what I said when Dean Parker resigned and you teased me about being a pig, but then teased me about a fivesome with Teri, Melody, Jeannette, and Marie?”
“That the ‘time of your life’ would be if you and I made love,” she replied quietly. “And, that even if you and I could only do it once, it would be worth more than a month with the five of them.”
“Q.E.D.”
“So, most physically pleasurable, then?”
“Tasha. Hands down. No contest! Though I expect to surpass that in about a week!”
Clarissa laughed, “I would hope so! So, where would you put Milena?”
“In the same category as you and Jocelyn, though you still win, easily.”
“You have no idea how much I love you, Petrovich!”
“I think I do,” I replied. “I’m the one man you could make love with. And you know how much I love you.”
“I do.”
“And everything is going exactly according to plan. We’re going to medical school together, which is the next step on the path.”
“So, besides Tasha?” Clarissa asked.
I chuckled, “You want a complete system of ratings?”
She laughed, “I’ll stop with second place on the pure physical pleasure scale.”
“I’m going to have to go with Kimiko because she was so focused on giving me maximum pleasure.”
“The dutiful Japanese girl who lived purely to please you?”
“Something like that. I’d really prefer we didn’t keep going down this path. I don’t particularly like comparing, and I only did it for you.”
“Sorry. I probably shouldn’t have asked, but I was extremely curious.”
“And for you, I answered; I wouldn’t do that for anyone else, and I really do try to avoid thinking that way. It could only ever hurt someone.”
“Elizaveta?”
I chuckled, “While she may be concerned about living up to some imaginary standard, I would say she has absolutely nothing to worry about in that regard!”
Clarissa laughed, “But the question remains - who is going to fuck whom senseless?”
“Either way works for me!” I said with a huge grin.
“It’s been close to a year, now that I think about it, hasn’t it?”
“Just under a year. I made the promise to Lara on July 6th of last year. The Sunday I get married will be about five weeks short of a year.”
“It really hasn’t affected you in any way I can discern.”
I shrugged, “Once I’d made the promise, real temptation basically dried up. Sure, there were offers, but not the way things were before. Everyone knew Lara and I were a couple, and it was only about a month after we decided it wasn’t going to work that I asked Elizaveta to marry me. The girls backed off because of Lara, and it just stayed that way.”
“You’re blaming the girls for your rampage?” Clarissa asked with an arched eyebrow.
I laughed, “No way! You know I didn’t usually seek out sex, but I had a very difficult time saying ‘no’ to girls who made themselves available, with a few exceptions.”
“Those Jezebels!” Clarissa teased.
“Yes, but who took them up on their offer? Me! I was in complete control! Well, I wasn’t, but you know what I mean!”
“That you are responsible for your own actions, no matter what anyone else does, but that you were VERY weak when it comes to an offer of sex! That seems to be a common thread with guys. That said, you were very good at keeping your word to Tasha, even when she tried to release you from your promise.”
“We had to grow up to do what we did,” I replied. “Any sooner and both of us would have believed it required us to get married, even if that wasn’t the right thing for the two of us.”
“And it let you figure things out with Lara without any drama, too.”
“Yes. The only real drama was being browbeaten by a certain very determined fifteen-year-old!”
“Poor baby! ‘Coerced’ into marrying a gorgeous Orthodox girl who wants to be his wife, can handle being the wife of a deacon, wants to be a doctor’s wife, and who is probably dripping in anticipation of having him fuck her silly in just over a week!”
“I wasn’t complaining! I was simply acknowledging that I was being a blockhead, which she had to overcome.”
“No more Russian?”
“Rarely,” I said. “I’m reasonably sure that was all part of my infatuation and lust for Tasha. Before she hit puberty, I had really cut down on how much Russian I used. I’d learned when I was little, and spoke to my grandparents and mom, but then once I was in school full time, I stopped using it for the most part. About the time I noticed that Tasha had developed into a gorgeous young woman, I started using more Russian. It wasn’t conscious, but I’m sure she’s the reason. Liz was right in that regard.
“Elizaveta and I talked about it, and we don’t plan to teach our kids Russian, though we wouldn’t interfere if our grandparents chose to do that. But having spoken with all of them, I think they’re all on the same basic page that I am - we’re Americans at this point. And that means we keep some of our ethnic traditions, but we speak English, which if you think about it, is what my mom’s parents did. Tasha’s family was something of an anomaly, though ROCOR has families like that who long to return to Russia, and might, once they see off the Communists.”
“You think that’ll happen?”
“I think the Church will outlive the government, yes. If Stalin couldn’t destroy the Russian Orthodox Church, nobody could. Even he worried about the grandmas!”
“Wow! You didn’t even use the Russian there!”
“I will, occasionally, for effect, but no, I didn’t. Mike and Elizaveta Loucks are Americans. Period.”
“Your sister must be jumping for joy!”
I chuckled, “I won’t go quite as far as she did - rejecting anything even remotely Russian, and I certainly am not going to leave the Church. Saint Michael the Archangel is fairly typical of the OCA now, being mostly American. Holy Transfiguration is moving that way and within a decade will only be vaguely Russian, mostly because of the Slavic names and a few traditions from the Old Country. But, there is one thing I don’t want to change.”
“What’s that?”
“I’d like you to keep calling me Petrovich!”
“So, your non-Russian friend is the one person who’ll use your Russian name?”
“The bishop will use ‘Mischa’. Normally, the married men would start calling me ‘Petrovich’ but I’ll be a deacon so nobody could really use that unless I gave them permission and even then, only in private.”
“What do your parents call you? I mean after ordination?”
“Anything they want!” I chuckled. “But seriously, it’ll depend on context. Privately, they, and my in-laws, will call me Mike. In public, ‘Father Deacon’ or ‘Father Deacon Michael’, though the ‘Father’ part is somewhat optional. And that’s the usual way I’ll be referred to and addressed, though some of the teens will probably opt for ‘Deacon Mike’ which is OK by me. And the bishop will only call me ‘Mischa’ in private. In public, he’ll use my title, just like everyone else. That’s the tradition.”
“So you’ll be ‘Doctor Loucks’ in the hospital, Deacon Michael in the church. What about everywhere else?”
“That’ll depend on context, too. Anyone who is Orthodox would call me ‘Deacon’, as would most other ordained clergy. Anyone who knows me outside of church will call me ‘Doctor Loucks’, or what I think I prefer, ‘Doctor Mike’.”
“And Elizaveta?”
“Husband!” I chuckled. “But for real as of a week from Sunday!”
“Mike, otherwise, right?”
“Yes. And I will keep calling her «Котёнок» as her pet name, and «зайчик» when I want to rile her up!”
“Because you want her to fuck like one?” Clarissa teased.
December 30, 1984, McKinley, Ohio On Sunday, after church, Clarissa, Elizaveta and I went to Tasha’s apartment to spend the afternoon with her and Nik. Tasha and Elizaveta prepared dinner together, and had a quiet conversation in Russian, while Nik, Clarissa, and I talked. From their body language, I got the impression that «бабушка» Natalya was giving Matushka Elizaveta advice. My first thought was that I should be very afraid, but that thought was fleeting, and I realized that if there was...
March 28, 1985, McKinley, Ohio On Thursday, after my lesson with Doctor Blahnik, I met with Mark and Alyssa for our final catechism class. We finished reviewing the Nicene Creed, and then went over the baptismal rite to ensure they knew exactly what would happen on Holy Saturday morning. “Seriously?” Mark asked. “A horse trough?” “It’s painted gold with three-bar crosses on each side,” I offered. “The only other options are a river or a lake. We could probably arrange that, if you felt it...
August 21, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “When’s your last day?” Grace asked on Tuesday morning. “Tomorrow. I need to participate in checking in Freshmen starting Thursday. Are you working Thursday and Friday?” “Thursday, because it’s check-in. Friday I’ll be at orientation. Do you think we could keep our chess dates?” “Evenings are out because of studying, but Tuesday and Thursday afternoons are completely free, except for my guitar lesson on Thursday right after lunch.” “What about Tuesday...
June 5, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “Do you want me to sleep at Doctor Blahnik’s house tonight?” Clarissa asked when she arrived at the dorm early on Tuesday evening so we could go to dinner. “No,” I replied. “Ice cream with Grace isn’t a date. And besides, you know the score.” “So this doesn’t end with her licking your cone?” she teased. I laughed, “No. I won’t be more than an hour or so.” “I’ll hang out with Jocelyn and Dona. I don’t want Kelly to complain I was in your room without you...
June 9, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “I’ve figured out what’s wrong with this game,” Dona said after we’d played the first nine holes. “What’s that?” “Using as few strokes as possible to get it in the hole!” I guffawed. “I mean, seriously, who wants FEWER strokes than average?” she continued. I laughed harder. “And who thinks that the best possible way to score is one stroke, then you take it out and move on to the next hole, never to put it in the first one again? GUYS! That’s who!” I...
June 2, 1984, McKinley, Ohio On Saturday morning, Clarissa left for her volunteer job at the local free clinic and I headed to the dorm to move my things from eight to two. It took about an hour to move everything and get it set up again. I’d just finished when I heard a very familiar voice call my name. “Hi, Jos!” I replied happily, holding out my arms. We hugged and exchanged a gentle kiss and then I pushed her cart down the hallway to her room. “You could have come up to get me to help...
April 28, 1985, McKinley, Ohio On Sunday, after the Divine Liturgy, Father Nicholas asked me to come to his office. “I spoke with Vladyka last evening. He gave his blessing for you to play in your band with a couple of conditions, which I don’t think will be a problem. The venues are important - no bars or clubs. He’d prefer you play things like High School dances, or venues where no alcohol is served. The key is decorum.” “Thank you. I’ll make sure I discuss any concerts with you in...
June 17, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “I’m going to break things off with Maggie tomorrow,” I said after Clarissa, Jocelyn, and I arrived at Tasha’s apartment for our usual Sunday dinner. “What?!” Jocelyn exclaimed. “I thought you were going to take the Summer.” “I’ve thought a lot about it, talked with Tasha, talked with Clarissa, and had a short talk with Doctor Blahnik. Basically, I let my promise to Maggie cause me to ignore the reality of the situation.” “Lara?” Jocelyn asked. “It’s...
January 2, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “Well?” Clarissa asked after I returned to the great room. “Wait and see. Angie’s next appointment is a week from tomorrow. I’m hoping Doctor Mercer waits until then to talk to Angie, but I’m afraid she’ll call Angie’s mom and THAT will cause Angie all sorts of heartache and might even set off her condition.” “Wouldn’t Doctor Mercer know that?” “Yes, but the problem is that Angie did something Doctor Mercer thinks is inherently dangerous. She’s almost...
October 20, 1984, McKinley, Ohio After Vespers on Saturday night, I headed back to campus and found a note saying the gang had gone to see Thief of Hearts and would be back around 10:00pm. I was dying to know if Clarissa and Sandy had received their letters from McKinley, but it looked as if I’d have to wait a few hours to find out. Given that my close friends were out, I really didn’t have much to do, so I picked up my guitar and played, though I didn’t sing. I started messing around with...
July 29, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “Your mom hasn’t called you yet?” Tasha asked when our small group gathered at her apartment on Sunday afternoon. “No,” I replied. “But I figured it would take a couple of weeks of not hearing from me or Liz before she decides she needs to talk to me.” “You’re doing OK?” “Yes. It’s not all that different from you and Sasha, except that your dad figured it out quickly.” “If by that you mean you shamed him into behaving as a Christian should, then yes.” “How...
May 13, 1985, McKinley, Ohio The phone rang very early on Monday morning, startling me awake. A quick glance at the clock told me that it had to be Angie calling, and I dreaded answering the phone. Reluctantly, I got out of bed and moved across the room to answer it. “Mike,” I said after I picked up the handset. “Mike? It’s Mom.” “Mom?” I gasped in surprise. “What’s wrong?” “Grandpa Loucks had a heart attack,” she said. “Dad is on his way to Chicago.” “How bad?” I asked. “His prognosis...
June 16, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “So that’s it?” Clarissa asked when I hung up the phone on Saturday morning. “Yes. After I talked to the investigators on Thursday morning, they closed the investigation and late yesterday the base commander told Maggie’s dad he wasn’t going to take any action. According to what Karl said, the base commander gave Maggie’s dad an unofficial reprimand about what he said to me, but that won’t have any negative effect on his career.” “And Maggie is going to see...
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January 24, 1985, McKinley, Ohio The phone rang on Thursday evening while we were studying and I went to my room to answer it. “Hi, Mike; It’s Fran Mercer.” “Hi, Doctor Mercer.” “I had a session with Angie today and explained to her about why the state wouldn’t let her marry. It didn’t go well.” “What happened?” I asked apprehensively. “She became very angry and agitated. Her psychiatrist ordered a mild sedative, but she’s refusing to take it.” “Lord have mercy,” I replied softly. “So...
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Hi ISS readers, I think all you know me. For the new readers, at first I introduce myself. I am Moni, late 40 and 5’-7”. I was born in a middle class Bangladeshi Muslim family and serving in a public organization. My whole life is lustful indeed. As I gained some practical experience about sex at my childhood, I became a sex-maniac and whenever I got chance I tried to fuck any aged girls or women with many tricks without applying force or at least to peep the uncovered boobs and pussies from...
October 17, 1981, McKinley, Ohio There was a knock at the door just before 6:00pm and I was sure it was the girls so I called out for them to come in. As expected, it was Jeannette and Marie. “Ready for hot meat between buns and slurping creamy white liquid?” Jeannette teased. “My bedroom is right there!” I grinned. “Should we leave you two the room?” Marie smirked. “Dinner first, then dessert!” Jeannette laughed. I took Angie’s hand and the four of us left the dorm and headed for the...
December 16, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “That was an interesting speech by your bishop,” Clarissa said as we relaxed in my room after studying for Monday’s Analytical Chemistry exam. “You mean because it sounded like he was speaking directly to me? Or to you?” “It almost seemed as if he were excusing sin.” “I understand how you could hear it that way, but what he was doing was acknowledging the power it has over us. Paul wrote about it in Romans 7. Believe it or not, I don’t have that entire...
February 9, 1985, Milford, Ohio “Do you mind sitting in the waiting room for five minutes while I talk to Doctor Mercer about Angie?” “That’s fine,” Elizaveta replied as we walked through the door of the building where Doctor Mercer had her office. We went upstairs and into the waiting room and Doctor Mercer greeted us. Elizaveta sat on the couch and Doctor Mercer and I went into her office. “Elizaveta will join us after we talk about Angie,” I said. “You don’t need any private...
August 31, 1984, Duquesne, Pennsylvania “Anything I need to know?” I said as we neared Lara’s house. “Not really. I told you about both sets of parents.” “Names? I mean other than I know your biological dad is Sergei Viktorovich Federov.” “My step-mom is Alisa, my step-dad is Albert, and my biological mom is Elena. My step-siblings are Karolina and Pavel. Oh, and my cat is named Lilia Felicksovna Koshkaa,” she added with a laugh. “Cute! I take it that your step-dad’s house is typically...
September 29, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “Yes!” Elizaveta squealed. Everyone clapped and the grandmothers put the choker and bracelet on Elizaveta, who was impatiently waiting to come to me. Just before she did, Gennady hurried over, winked, and we exchanged a Russian greeting, causing everyone but Elizaveta, who simply rolled her eyes, to laugh. Once Gennady moved away, Elizaveta quickly came to me and we hugged tightly, then Elizaveta turned to her maternal grandmother. “Grandmother, may I...
October 13, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “I’d like you each to fill out this worksheet,” Father Nicholas said. “Please do not collaborate on the answers. It’s important for me to understand our starting point. Please don’t overthink this, or write down what you think I want to hear or what you think the other person wants to hear.” I scanned the worksheet before I began, something I did for every exam, quiz, or worksheet, then began with the first questions which mostly had to do with how well I...
November 17, 1984, West Monroe, Ohio “What did you say to get your dad to come upstairs?” Elizaveta asked as we climbed into my Mustang for the drive back to McKinley. “I just insisted he keep his word to you.” “To me? I’ve never spoken to him until today!” “The promise he made, three years ago, to love any girl I married and treat her like a daughter, was made to you. Well, assuming I’m not in enough trouble with you that you’re going to call off the wedding.” “You said you wanted to be...
January 17, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “My parents were kicked out of the church because they wouldn’t make me stop coming to Saint Michael the Archangel,” Mark said when I greeted him and Alyssa on Thursday afternoon. “Are they going to the Lutheran Church?” “Starting on Sunday, yes.” “What about yours, Alyssa?” “They’re supposed to have a meeting with the elders on Saturday morning. I invited them to Saint Michael, and Mark’s parents suggested they go to the Lutheran church.” “But it’s not...
February 16, 1985, Greater Cincinnati, Ohio “Good morning, Subdeacon,” Father Stephen said when Elizaveta and I walked into the main lobby of The Christ Hospital in Cincinnati. The hospital was on Mt. Auburn, one of the highest points in the city, and offered a nice view of the city below. Father Stephen was clad in his ryasa. “Father, bless!” I said, holding my cupped hands for his blessing. “Bless you, Subdeacon,” he said, making the sign of the cross over my upturned palms. I kissed...
May 26, 1985, McKinley, Ohio On Sunday morning, I decided to walk my usual route through Doctor Blahnik’s neighborhood, rather than run. I had nervous energy I needed to burn off, but I didn’t want to burn off ALL my energy. I put on my shorts, t-shirt, and running shoes, and went out the front door. I was surprised to find Clarissa sitting on the steps waiting for me. She hopped up and we exchanged a hug. “What are you doing here?” I asked. “Waiting for you! Ready?” “For?” She laughed,...
September 20, 1984, Milford, Ohio “Thanks for coming here, Mike,” Doctor Mercer said when I walked into her office. “I felt I had to. Clarissa and Sandy are at Frisch’s, and I’ll join them when we’re done. They know it could be a while.” “Have a seat,” she invited. Instead of sitting down, I went to the couch, took off my shoes, lay down, and stretched out. Doctor Mercer got up and moved to the chair which was positioned just behind my head. “This is different,” she said. “I know,” I...
December 24, 1984, McKinley, Ohio On Monday, which was Christmas Eve, I slept in, ate a light breakfast, then made some tea and went to sit in the music room to start reading Foundation. I read for about fifteen minutes before Doctor Blahnik came into the room. “What time are you leaving?” she asked “About 11:00am.” “And you’ll be back tonight?” “Around 9:30pm, most likely. We’ll go to Vespers, then have a light meal.” “Will you join Milena, Joel, Derek, and me to decorate the tree? I...
Theophany, January 6, 1985, McKinley, Ohio After I dropped Elizaveta at home, I took a chance and drove to Father Nicholas’ house. Matushka Natalya greeted me at the door and let me in. Father Nicholas invited me to his study. “Sorry to bother you at home, but the bishop suggested I speak to you.” “Am I going to be happy at the end of this conversation?” “Angie drove from Cincinnati on New Year’s Day to talk to me.” “I thought she wasn’t supposed to drive!” “She’s not. She did it...
March 15, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “What did I hear you playing?” Clarissa asked when I came downstairs on Friday afternoon. “Just practicing,” I replied. “Yes, but that was no guitar!” she protested. I frowned, “I really should have skipped practicing this week. It’s a surprise for my wedding.” “Wait! That’s one of those Russian guitars like the girl had in Doctor Zhivago!” “A balalaika,” I confirmed. “It was Doctor Blahnik’s suggestion.” “What songs can you play?” “The only one I play...
April 19, 1985, McKinley, Ohio Elizaveta drove my car to Pizza Inn, where her friends had reserved the small banquet room for the party. She’d be taking her driving test Thursday, and wanted a bit more practice. I was sure she’d pass, but with BMV employees, one never knew what might happen. When we arrived, Elizaveta backed into the parking spot just as I’d taught her, and after locking up the car, we went inside to where ten of her friends and their boyfriends or girlfriends were waiting,...
September 29, 1984, McKinley, Ohio At the close of Vespers, Father Nicholas, I, and two acolytes left the altar. He completed the prayers which served as the Dismissal, then turned to the congregation. “One announcement,” he said. “Tomorrow, immediately following the Divine Liturgy, we’ll have a betrothal ceremony for Subdeacon Michael and Elizaveta Kozlova.” There were a few gasps, but otherwise, no real reaction because we were in the nave, where applause or chatter was completely...
December 31, 1984, McKinley, Ohio Elizaveta greeted me at the door with a soft kiss, then took me to her father’s study. She left me with him and Gennady, then went to the kitchen to put the finishing touches on the meal. I accepted a splash of brandy from Viktor and we toasted. “When do you head back to Harvard?” I asked Gennady. “Wednesday afternoon,” he replied. “You know, I never asked if you had a girlfriend.” “I do. A girl who lives in Boston, but who’ll move here if I ask her to...
Sunday Of The Prodigal Son - February 10, 1985, McKinley, Ohio On Sunday morning, when I left the altar during the canon of Matins to retrieve Father Nicholas’ homily which he’d left in his office, I was pleased to see Mr. and Mrs. Greenwald standing near Mark and Alyssa. When I returned to the altar with Father Nicholas’ notecards, I quietly let him know that they were in attendance. As the Matins moved to the Divine Liturgy, the hymns foretold the destination of our Lenten journey, which...
May 25, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “In Psalm 8, we read - When I consider Your heavens, the work of Your fingers; The moon and the stars, which You have ordained; What is man that You are mindful of him; And the son of man that You visit him? For You have made him a little lower than the angels; And You have crowned him with glory and honor; You have made him to have dominion over the works of Your hands; You have put all things under his feet. “‘Crowned him with glory and honor’ - that is us,...
December 27, 1984, Rutherford and McKinley, Ohio “Marie, this is my friend Dale Melrose. Dale, this is my friend Marie De Santis.” I could tell by the look on Dale’s face he was VERY attracted to Marie, and knowing Marie, she’d be more than happy to entertain him, if that’s what he wanted. “Dale,” Jocelyn said, “this is my boyfriend, Bill Ebersole. Bill, Dale.” They shook hands and I suppressed a chuckle at the thought that Dale didn’t look at Bill the same way he had at Marie. We walked...
December 28, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “That’s how you left it?” Clarissa asked, later that evening, as we sat by the fireplace. “Given I didn’t have an answer to her question, there wasn’t really anything more I could say. She didn’t make me leave or anything, and we had a nice dinner with her parents and maternal grandparents. And she kissed me properly when I left.” “That’s good, I think.” “I think it’s neutral, which is, I suppose, ‘good’ from one perspective.” “I think you were right...
March 9, 1985, McKinley, Ohio On Saturday morning, Clarissa and I had breakfast together at Doctor Blahnik’s house where we were both staying during break. I’d slept at the dorm the previous night because it didn’t officially close until Saturday at noon. I had walked over from the dorm, made my toast with jam and sliced a grapefruit, then poured a glass of grapefruit juice and joined Clarissa at the kitchen table where she was eating bacon and pancakes with maple syrup. “How are things at...
April 15, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “How are you feeling, Petrovich?” Clarissa asked when she came to my door on Monday morning after I’d run and prayed. “Fine. I slept like a log last night! What did Abby think?” “She was pretty awestruck by the service and had a good time at the party. Everyone else seemed to have a great time, too.” “I think Clark made some new friends,” I chuckled. “He spent like three hours with the old men smoking and drinking!” “So did Gene. Did Jocelyn have to pour...
May 25, 1984, West Monroe, Ohio After our second round, Violet and I went to her bathroom to shower. We needed to get back to the party, so we didn’t take too long, and once we were clean and dry, we dressed and I helped her change the sheets on her bed. She put them in the washing machine, and checked the time so she could return to put them in the dryer. Once she was satisfied there was no remaining evidence, we left the house to walk back to the party. “Thank you for fucking my brains...
Chapter 10: Love And Other Things June 23, 1984, West Monroe, Ohio I’d had to skip my Saturday morning mini-golfing with Dona because Clarissa and I needed to be in McKinley for Sasha’s 11:00am wedding. Saturday weddings were not the norm, but Vladyka ARKADY had granted «ekonomia» because of the circumstances. While we were in the Apostle’s Fast, there were no strict canons against marriage during the Apostles Fast like there were for the Dormition Fast which would begin in a week. Given...
June 30, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “I was right!” I said when I arrived at Doctor Blahnik’s house after lunch with Mr. Kozlov. “No way!” “He asked me to take responsibility for the distribution of charity to individuals and families in need. He’s been doing it, temporarily, because of Deacon Grigory’s heart attack. As he said, it does belong with clergy, and typically falls to the deacon.” “Good call, Petrovich.” “He did have a second matter to discuss,” I grinned. “So, actually, we were both...
August 4, 1984, Rutherford, Ohio “Hi!” Liz exclaimed when Lara and I walked into the restaurant in Rutherford on Saturday morning. “Hi!” I replied, hugging her. Paul and I shook hands with a nod, I hugged Emmy, and then the five of us sat in a round corner booth. “Liz said you did really well on your test,” Paul said. I nodded, “I’ll get into the school I want, which is all that really mattered to me. Well, I have to have an interview, but I don’t foresee any problems there. Clarissa did...
October 1, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “Hi, Ang,” I said when she came to the phone. “Hi, Mike!” she answered. “How are you?” “Fine. How are you?” “OK. Have you thought about what I asked?” “Yes. Has Doctor Mercer talked to you about it?” “Yes,” Angie sighed. “And you agree with her?” “It’s more complicated than that,” I replied gently. “At this point, with my upcoming ordination, that kind of sin would be a serious problem. Father Nicholas warned me, without us talking about you, that he’d...
October 18, 1984, McKinley, Ohio On Thursday Clarissa, Sandy, and I had our fifth and final interviews in Pittsburgh. It followed the same basic pattern as the other four. Each of the schools - McKinley, OSU, UC, Indiana, and Pittsburgh had something to recommend itself. The girls and I discussed the strengths and weaknesses of each of the four schools besides McKinley, and decided, if we all didn’t get into McKinley, our order of choices would be UC, Indiana, Pittsburgh, and then OSU. Any...
October 20, 1984, West Monroe, Ohio “Please do not let my parents bait you into an emotional response,” I said to Elizaveta as I turned off Route 50 in West Monroe. “You think they will?” “I have no idea; I just wanted to warn you.” “Paul seems really nice,” Elizaveta said. “And yes, it was bad that he broke the law, but he and Liz are getting married. So in the end, they’re doing the right thing. You’re five years older than I am, and right now, I’m only about a year older than Liz...
November 3, 1984, McKinley, Ohio “That was fantastic, Mike!” Melody gushed when the debate ended about two hours after it had begun. “He served me up a series of fastballs right over the plate,” I replied. “His mistake was attacking externals at first, because that put him on the wrong foot from the get-go. If he had focused purely on theology, I wouldn’t have been able to score so many points with what amounted to ‘zingers’.” “You had him too tied up in knots trying to explain how he knew...
December 11, 1984, Rutherford, Ohio “What do you want us to do?” Clarissa asked. “If you and Jocelyn will just wait here, Elizaveta and I will go get my dad.” “You’re that confident?” “No, but I have to seem confident to successfully make the case to my dad. And I have less than ten minutes in which to do that.” Jocelyn and I got out of the car, then Clarissa and Elizaveta got out of the back seats. I took Elizaveta’s hand and led her into the County Administration Building. We took the...
January 12, 1985, Greater Cincinnati, Ohio “You came alone?” Doctor Mercer asked when I walked into her office in Milford. “I did. I’m going to see Angie’s pastor after you and I finish our session.” “Did you tell Elizaveta you were going to be here?” “Yes.” “Did you tell her WHY you were going to be here?” “No. That seemed to me to introduce unnecessary turmoil. I did tell my bishop and priest about the situation.” “That’s unexpected. Why tell them and not her?” “I saw my bishop on...
January 12, 1985, McKinley, Ohio “How are you, Mik?” Jocelyn asked when I arrived back at the dorm. “I feel like I’ve gone fifteen rounds with Ali.” “Would you even last one round?” “No, of course not, but I STILL feel like I was in the ring for the full fifteen.” “I know you usually talk to Clarissa, but she’s with Abby. I have an ear if you want.” “I love you, Jos; that’s never changed. And I can use an ear.” “Then come on,” she said. “Your room?” “We’ll leave the door open if you...