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Stay Casino! Slots are, by far, the most popular game at any casino, whether online or on land. The barrier of entry is extremely low, the gameplay is simple, and the rules are clear. You don’t have to spend time learning confusing strategies or dealing with upset players at a live table. It can just be you, your machine, and a big jackpot.
Slots are inherently games of chance, but that doesn’t mean you can’t employ some tips and tricks to help you maximize the opportunities to get a big win. Of course, they won’t guarantee you a massive payout, but they might stop you from losing it all.
Slot Thoughts
First off, some basics. As with any gambling, you should set a fixed spending limit to keep yourself out of the red. To that end, start by playing low denominations until you understand how that slot machine functions. Each pays out differently, and how you play can affect that.
Knowing the paytable is key to understanding how the payouts will work. Slot machines are required to make the odds public for all of their devices. When reading the paytables, look out for progressive slots. They tend to distribute wins in large jackpots instead of small amounts during regular spins. That means you will need to dump more money in before a payout may happen. Finally, play slots for fun, not to pay your damn bills.
Now for some more detailed advice. Perhaps the most important thing to do is pay attention to RTP (Return to Player). The higher the number, the more likely you will earn your money back. Look for slots with a return to player of at least ninety-five percent. Some slots have up to a ninety-eight percent RTP.
Next up is to select slots with bonus symbols. It’s never a good idea to turn down free money. Bonus symbols give you the chance to win re-spins, free spins, wild cards, multipliers, jackpots rounds, and bonus rounds. They also make the game much more exciting. Usually, bonus symbols come with cut scenes, bright lights, and fireworks. Games with bonuses typically have an increased variance, but it’s easier to win in exchange.
Pay attention to how a slot machine treats its bonus symbols. Many devices automatically count them when they appear, but some require you to select them. These are called “pick ‘ems.” They add an element of engagement that’s very fun, but you can end up fucking yourself if you don’t know you’re playing a pick ’em. Pay attention to the paytable and read everything carefully. As you become more familiar with slots, you will gather an intuitive sense of the slot machine’s deal.
When selecting a slot, there are two extremes you must balance because you can’t have both. You can either have a large payout size or a high payout frequency. Neither is better than the other. It just depends on what your playstyle is. For example, if you have a smaller budget, hit frequency is more important. Those smaller wins ensure you don’t hit your limit too quickly. On the other hand, the higher payout option may be more attractive if you have some money to spend.
Those paytables are endlessly important. Another thing to pay attention to on them is jackpot eligibility. To qualify for the jackpot, you must bet the maximum on many slot machines. Far too many novice players don’t know this and bet the minimum thinking it will give them a shot at the big one. Unfortunately, this is untrue. If you want to win twenty million, you will have to put some skin in the game.
This next one is significant because many idiots and scam artists will try to sell you some bullshit slot methods they claim are a sure-fire way to retirement. So let me make this as straightforward as possible. There are precisely zero ways for you to influence the random number generator inside a slot machine. Anyone telling you otherwise is a crackpot. There’s no particular cheat or technique that will budge the numbers. There’s no hidden button combination. Playing faster won’t help. The time of day does not matter. It’s all genuinely random.
On that note, please avoid being superstitious. The Gods don’t give a shit about sick, starving children, and they must have been napping during the holocaust. If those events didn’t inspire action, do you really think they give a fuck about your next slot machine spin? Unlikely. There are no hot or cold machines, lucky numbers aren’t real, and that gut feeling you’re having is your breakfast being digested.
Might I direct you to an experiment colloquially referred to as the superstitious pigeon experiment? Long story short, pigeons were taught to perform certain actions in exchange for food, and they accomplished this task quite well. However, when food dispensing became random, the bird started inventing elaborate dances they thought controlled when the food came out. The longer it went on, the more complicated the dances became. This concept explains a depressingly large amount of humanity’s worst behaviors. Don’t become a superstitious pigeon while playing a slot machine.
Now that you are fully loaded with a wealth of slot knowledge, it’s time to get you in a casino. Fuck driving out to some fetid heap full of the detritus of society. Instead, stay at home and hit up Staycasino. Staycasino is a global leader in digital gambling. You can’t get too much better than this shit.
The first thing you will notice is the superb web design on Staycasino. The dark background is easy on the eyes, and all game types are well organized, so you won’t have any problem finding a suitable game for you. The main menu runs down the left side and contains the options Promos, Games, Search, Events, Tournaments, Payments, VIP, and Club. The gaming menu is to the right with the options Slots, New, Popular, Bonus buy, Megaways, and Live.
The Money Tree
The promos on Staycasino are one of its best features. These guys know what keeps a person gambling: free money. The welcome bonus is one of my favorites I’ve ever seen. They don’t stop the bonus train with your first deposit or even your second and third - You will receive a bonus on your first six deposits.
Your first deposit is matched one hundred percent up to one hundred and fifty Euros plus one hundred free spins; your seconds earn you a seventy-five percent match up to one hundred and fifty Euros and fifty free spins. Your third bag you a seventy-five percent match up to one hundred Euros and fifty free spins. Your fourth gets you a fifty percent deposit of up to two hundred Euros and one hundred free spins. Your fifth nets you another one hundred percent match up to one hundred Euros and fifty free spins. Finally, your sixth deposit earns you “the secret bonus.” Altogether, it’s known as Grandma’s welcome pie; it’s time to cream pie Grandma.
Once you work your way through those and become a vet, bonuses are still available to you. There are new bonuses created each week for you to take advantage of. At the time of this article, there were two weekly bonuses, unlimited free spin Tuesday and the weekend reload bonus that earns you an extra two hundred Euros.
There are also a couple of one-time bonuses. So if your birthday is coming up, you should definitely join because members get a one hundred percent match bonus along with twenty free spins. The second is a high roller bonus for all my readers with cash to blow. That gives you a fifty percent match on deposits over three hundred Euros and under Sixteen hundred.
Finally, Staycasino is always running a lotto for all members. There are five winning tickets, and the prize is one thousand free spins. That’s a lot of fucking slot playing all for free.
When I’m taking a short respite from stroking my cock I often find myself on Staycasino. They have designed a superb online casino with all the features I need to have a good time. The web design is on point. You will never have trouble finding the right game for you. Their slot selection is fucking massive. You couldn’t run out of games to play if you tried. The real trick is all their excellent promotions. They are giving away money and spins like they grow on trees. It’s like throwing money out the window not joining this site.
As much praise as I have to heap upon Staycasino, I still see areas they could improve. For example, I really enjoy their free spin lotto. But I would love it if they came up with other lotteries for members to participate in.
I love gambling, but it needs to be on a world-class establishment when I do it. Well, Staycasino is just that. They know how to treat me, and you can’t beat their awesome bonus selection.
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