Life's A Funny Bitch free porn video

Ted rushed back to the house in a frenzy, walking a little oddly from the cock throbbing in his pants, ready to explode from the rubbing of the fabric. He pushed away the recurring images engraved on his mind of Sarah’s lips enveloping Terry’s shaft, working down relentlessly to the hilt as her clearly well-practiced throat opened easily to his eight inches of magnificent flesh. Her ass had risen and fallen behind her head like a drunken rising moon as Terry sucked her into their mutual paradise; she ground down on his face about the same time his hands had held her head in place, tremors running through his belly and thighs, her eyes opening wide in unseeing amazement and her cheeks hollowed as she swallowed avidly, then pulled away to whimper softly in the O-face Ted had hoped someday to evoke but never really expected ever to see. Terry’s cock slowly softened as his slurping sounds continued, driving Sarah to two more peaks of pleasure before collapsing.

Ted had stared in awe at his deepest female crush stripping in unison with one of his mild male crushes, the rabbi’s daughter and the preacher’s son, repressing a sigh at the sight of her plump body, her wide hips and thick thighs the perfect setting for the thick black tangle of hairs he had wished to see since the instant he met her, then looking up to see the low-slung breasts with her star dangling between them. He next stared at Terry’s perfectly chiseled body, thick nest of dark brown hair surrounding the magnificent instrument rising like a modern sculpture of an ascending bird, watching him chuckle as Sarah lifted his cross to look at it before saying, “Mine’s much more interesting. Geometrically speaking, of course.”

“I’m here for sex, not math.”

“Tough shit, you get both with me, lover,” she replied with a smile as wide as his, and added, “Math is just like sex.”

He lay on the ground and replied, “No, math is like masturbation, physics is like sex. Any physicist will tell you that.”

She laughed sharply and settled on his face, lined up perfectly for Ted to watch as they launched quickly into an expert sixty-nine.

Shocked, scared at being found watching, and incredibly horny at the scene before him, Ted had stayed in the dark storage room in perfect silence as they sucked each other dry, then in a last hurrah had coupled, Sarah’s knees at Terry’s ribs as he had entered paradise and soon taken her there with him. They lasted only five minutes, but both had climaxed loudly, perfectly matched in lust and passionate release, sweat glistening on them as they had then hurriedly dressed and left.

Ted waited for five minutes to follow them. He was much too horny to simply spray happily in the dark; he needed privacy and special efforts to relieve the fire in his mind and pulsing feeling in his loins. He locked the door as he left after doing a last unnecessary inspection that all the equipment was back in place, and wondered what would have happened if the light had been on when they came in. However, by sheer lucky happenstance, he had been sitting in the dark looking around. He was halfway sure there was a hole near the ceiling somewhere, though even in the darkness no light showed, but by that point he was mostly just enjoying the warm silence and darkness after a trying week, relaxing as he sat on the smallest pile of mats. His muscles ached from practice, and he had opened the door slightly as he heard the outer door open. He had peeked out to see if the intruders were vandals or coaches, and as Sarah and Terry fell into a passionate embrace he had frozen, and after a minute knew he could not and should not interrupt them.

In ten minutes Ted was home. He walked around to the back, rushed through the back door and kitchen into his room, where without ado he stripped and lay on the floor, lifted his hips over his head, put his feet on the wall, and finding just the right angle gave a quick push and felt his chin wet with the precum oozing from the tip of his cock. In his mind’s eye, he opened wide to let Terry become the first man in his mouth as Sarah started to work her special skill set on him, and his head slipped inside easily, the taste of his cum long since familiar to him.

Stretching his back in anticipation, he thrust forward and started feeding himself into his mouth, his rubbery head fitting neatly between his tongue and palate, and in his fevered imagination, he replayed the first bob of Sarah’s head as she took Terry inside. The thrill he always felt when he gave in to sucking himself made him push himself further, and with a great effort he opened his jaw as far as it would go in such a confined position and slipped in further than he ever had before, perhaps half his shaft within himself. He stared happily at his wrinkled ball sac dangling above him and obscuring the hilt of his shaft, and at the same time that he remembered Sarah’s skilled ministrations, he exulted at the knowledge that he had his own special skills.

This time he decided to take his time. So often he had gotten the head between his lips, pushed twice to get an inch of shaft inside, and immediately launched his orgasm into his sucking maw; this time he took a rough breath and tried to clear his mind of everything but his mouth and cock. His gymnastics training had always kept him limber, but the last month of heavy-duty practice day after day had paid off, he now realized, in endurance. He suckled happily at his flesh, little drops of tangy precum feeding into his mouth, holding off each time he got close. His balls felt swollen to the size of tennis balls, his cock felt as if it would burst the moment he gave in to his lust, and his back scarcely felt the effort this time. He pushed a little further and felt himself slide in easily.

That pushed him near the edge, so he pulled back and satisfied himself for now with light movements of his crushed tongue side to side on the top of his cock head. He worked his lips back and forth on his shaft as he thought back on his first time feverishly pushing his head to his lips, finally reaching success, his heart singing at the same time his cock exploded, stream after stream of sick-making goo shooting into his mouth and out the corners, the horniness and pride ebbing as the shame and fear of being gay rose. But he had done it once and was determined to do it again once his horniness outweighed his shock at such perversion. Four days later he had quickly assumed the position and flooded his mouth just as quickly, if less copiously, and had checked his response to the beautiful woman in the centerfold to make sure he wasn’t gay, then jerked off twice in quick succession to confirm his suspicions. By the fourth time, the oozing then spurting sick-making goo was familiar to him, even welcome, and he settled into twice-monthly self-suckings that he would have bragged about from the rooftops if he weren’t certain he’d be an eternal pariah for practicing such a perversely unclassifiable act. Was it gay? Was it masturbation? Or was it merely gymnastics taken to the ultimate extreme?

In fact, he had soon realized, it was all three. While he certainly wanted women, he also realized as he read stories and magazine letters that he wanted men too and masturbated constantly to thoughts of doing everything his overheated seventeen-year-old mind could think of. He feared, as so many young men did, becoming erect in the shower after practice, so he had volunteered to help clean up after practice so that he could shower alone after everyone else had left, or waited to get home so he could soap up both front and back, the luckiest of Pierres in his fevered brain, fucking a whole fist in front as three fingers took him from behind, or magically multiplied into three clones taking a willing woman in every hole she had to offer him.

None of that mattered now. Instead of the diffuse focus of his mental imagery in the past whenever his cock thrust into his mouth, he had a fixed, brightly burning image of Sarah enjoying two men and him enjoying the two of them. He remembered the mixed grimace and smile of her face as Terry drained into her, the swallowing as her climax washed over her, and with a pull of his ass with his hands he plunged into his mouth as far as he could manage. It was mostly the angle of attack that prevented him from deep-throating himself, a disappointment soon swept away by the largest load of his life surging spontaneously into his mouth. The head of his cock blossomed in the back of his mouth and he swallowed like an assembly line: pulse, spurt, swallow, pulse of pleasure, satisfying spurt, eager swallow, his whole consciousness reduced to need and release, wet hole and solid pillar, spasm and ingestion. All he felt and tasted was his mouth and his sperm, and all he heard was the rushing of his blood in his ears; with his eyes closed, he saw nothing at all, not even mentally, in his exclusive focus on every sensation of his ejaculation.

The orgasm lasted a long time, perhaps a dozen spurts, several of them seemingly containing more goo at once than he had ever drained in his largest ejaculation in the past. He sucked out the last drops and lay flat on the floor with a sigh, his cock half hard now and still softening. He would masturbate several more times that day, he knew, but the edge was off and he could think with something besides his cock. He stood and started to dress and noticed the letters on his table next to the door. He looked past it to see that the door that he thought he had left open in his haste was now mostly closed, and he blushed. Were the letters there before? He couldn’t remember. Had he perhaps pulled the door shut on his rush in? Again, he couldn’t remember.

He heard some noises in the living room. So, Sally was home. That didn’t mean she had seen him, but…she probably had. What to do, what to do?

He took a deep breath and thought. Sally was no shrinking violet, this he knew. Besides, they had known each other much of his life. She gave him all the privacy he wanted and treated him like an adult, not a nineteen-year-old student living in the back room. If she had seen him…she’d be cool about it, he decided. So he would be too.

After another minute straightening himself, he went out into the kitchen and poured himself some water, then went into the living room. “Oh, hi!” he said with an apprehension he didn’t show.

Sally looked up at him with a strange glance almost immediately extinguished by her usual smile. “How was your day?”

“It was good. I didn’t know you were here.” He looked at the clock. “So early.”

“Air conditioning went out. I decided to let everyone go early with pay and gave them each three hours of work for this evening.”

He nodded and sat down on the other end of the sofa. He raised the glass and said, “TGIF.”

She chuckled and raised an imaginary glass, and he drank the water down, each quick nervous swallow followed by a pause to think. He finished it and sat there silently, watching her as she looked at him. She was dressed to the nines, her burgundy blouse complementing the medium brown of her skin, the beautiful mixture of black and Mediterranean looking as enchanting as always.

An old friend of his mother’s, she had offered to let him stay with her when he went off to college. His parents were overjoyed that he would have a safe (and cheap) place to live; he was overjoyed because she had been one of his first puppy crushes, and then his hottest masturbatory target his senior year in high school. She had visited one week, the first time he had seen her in four years, and where once she had been his sweet “Aunt” Sally, now she was Sally the perfect older woman, accomplished and beautiful.

They sat there quietly until she said, “Care for a drink?”

“I’d love one.” This was true—with any luck, he’d dissolve the knot in his stomach and no longer care whether she had seen him.

“Say ‘when.’”

“Give me three fingers.”

She raised her eyebrow and chuckled; she brought him his drink, only a finger and a half, then sat across from him on the sofa. “Cheers.”

They raised their glasses and sipped, and she told him about the work she was doing right now, talking naturally as they always did, perfectly matched housemates and long-time friends. He relaxed over the next fifteen minutes and then told her about most of his day over the first sips of their second drink.

She then said, “How does pizza sound tonight?”

“Great.”

“It won’t interfere with your training?”

“Nah.”

“Thank God. I’m too beat to do anything but lollygag around the rest of the day. Sure as hell not gonna cook.” He smiled at that, remembering the first time he heard such funny Texas words from his notional aunt as a silly boy of six; as a high school senior he had wished she would gag on his lolly every time he saw her.

“Yeah, I just wanna crash.”

“Sounds like a fine plan.”

They sat back holding their drinks, thinking their separate thoughts, and finally she asked, “So how is training going?”

“Really well, actually,” he said. “Coach says all the practice last year is finally paying off. He said I didn’t push myself nearly hard enough in high school. Had to get good habits last year and now I’m reaping the benefit.” The warm glow of the whiskey in his belly seemed to be just a continuation of the warmth of the cum he had swallowed, and he smiled at the memory of that first mind-boggling spurt. He looked up at Sally watching him and blushed.

“Good,” she said. “What special training do you do now?”

“Lots of stretches. In directions I never did before, stretching muscles I never stretched before.”

A former runner, Sally smiled, “It’s amazing what the human body can do when you push it far enough.”

He nodded and remembered one evening his first week living with her when they had traded training advice. She had said, “I still run, but not like in college. Thank God for the sports bra,” she had added as he had glanced down at her fairly ample bosom, and said maliciously, “These girls would bruise my face without one. That’s not as much fun for me as it is for my men, you know,” and laughed at his furious blush and, he suspected, his quick shift to hide his sudden erection. Over the intervening months, he had seen her in her sports bra often enough after runs not even to feel amazement any more at how thoroughly it made her breasts disappear.

“Gymnasts must have to stretch a lot. I’m surprised it’s new to you.”

“Some of it is, but others I’ve done for years.” He kept from grinning wildly at that and simply added, “There’s this one I do for my obliques I wish I’d known back in high school. I didn’t realize how much they needed it until last week. God, last Friday my sides were killing me.”

They laughed and she said, “It’s like the first times I stretched my calf muscles in the back properly. It hurt like hell and made me want to pee something fierce, but damn it felt good at the same time.”

“Yes. Just like that.”

He then told her about some of the stretches, and as the whiskey mellowed them both he finally said, “I saw my mail in my room.”

She nodded quietly and watched his face.

“When…?”

After a long pause, she replied, “I saw.” After another pause, she said, “I wasn’t going to mention it. I didn’t want to embarrass you.”

“So…”

“I reached in to put the mail on your little table and saw you.”

“You must think…”

“I think it’s perfectly natural.” After a pause, she added, “Well, not that. That was the most unnatural thing I’ve ever seen.” They laughed, his apprehension dissolving, and she said, “Masturbation, I mean. We all do it. Nothing to be ashamed of.”

After another sip, she said, “I had heard that some men can do that, but it seemed impossible to me. It was…impressive.”

“So you just saw and left?”

She blushed, the first time he had ever seen her do so, and she said, “I was curious. I watched until you finished. Three minutes maybe, and then ducked the hell out of there. I was really hoping it wouldn’t come up between us.”

“Sorry. I shouldn’t have asked.”

“No, it’s okay. At least I won’t have that secret hanging over us. Watching what you’re not invited to…It can really fuck things up.”

He blushed and said, “True.” He now wondered if he’d ever be able to face Sarah again without drooling all over himself in a beet-red blush before passing out and smiled at the thought.

“So, is that…some of your new special stretching? A special gymnast’s technique?”

“I’ve been able to do it for years.”

She goggled at him. “Really.”

He then told her about it, first in brief, then in some detail as her curiosity clearly knew no bounds, and she finally asked, “So you do that…every day?”

“I used to a couple of times a month, once a week. Now it’s just special occasions.”

“So what was so special about today?”

“I saw something I shouldn’t have myself.”

“Oh?”

“A girl I have a crush on snuck into the gym room with a hot guy. They didn’t know I was there. I saw everything.”

“So you were torn with jealousy…”

“No, I wanted to join them. Make both of them very happy.”

She smiled, “I know the feeling. I remember in college, I was really hot for one guy, but he had a girlfriend. One night after a party I was sitting out by the trees and they came there and didn’t know I was there. I wanted them both. It surprised me a little, wanting both of them.”

“So what happened?”

“After their first orgasm I stepped into the clearing and said, ‘Let me join you.’ And they did.”

“Wow.”

“Yes, wow. I’d had girl crushes before, but that was the first time I’d wanted more.”

“So…how many…”

“With them? Every night for a year. But they were seniors and I was a freshman, so they graduated and left me all alone.”

“No, how many women?”

“Twelve. Depending on what you count. And you’ve never been with a man?”

“No.”

“Women?”

“A couple. Nothing great. Graduation night, a dance last year. They weren’t up for anything long-term.”

She nodded. “So when you got home…”

“I imagined I was sucking him, she was sucking me, and he was sucking her.”

She smiled, “It is fun. It’s like sixty-nining except you can change from AC to DC any time you like.” She paused for a minute and finally said, “But wow, sucking yourself. Lucky man.”

“I doubt any woman could do it.”

She smiled, “Contortionists can, or so I’m told. They say one of the girls in my freshman dorm could. She had trained from a very early age and was very very flexible. But that was just a rumor someone started after we saw her performance once. But yeah, she probably could. The way she could bend her back, it looked inhuman; her face was pretty much in contact with her mount more than once. It did seem possible. And she never had a girlfriend or boyfriend, so maybe she did. If I could suck myself without breaking my back, I’d never leave my room.”

They laughed and she rose to pour them both another. When she came back, she said, “But yes, probably everyone has a story about the embarrassing time they were caught masturbating.”

“What’s yours?”

She smiled and said, “Well…My junior year I was showering late after a long run. I had soaped up and washed my flower clean, but then I decided it needed more cleaning.” They both laughed and she said, “I hadn’t had any loving for two months and I just rubbed away. I had the loudest orgasm I had ever had outside my room and looked up, and there was the captain of our running team staring at me.”

“Oh my God.”

“Yeah. I was scared shitless. She pointed at me and said, ‘You. Wait here for me. Don't you fucking dare leave. We need a serious talk about the use of school facilities.’”

“You must have died.”

“I nearly did. She had a quick shower and dried off and said, ‘Come with me’ and took me into the team office. Both of us naked, of course, and there she locked the door and said, ‘You never use the showers for sex, understand?’ I nodded and she said, ‘That’s what this office is for.’ And she made me sit on the edge of the desk and went down on me and then we sixty-nined for an hour. Afterwards, she said, ‘We both need regular sex, so here’s my private number.’ She had known I was bi and had decided to have me, then I offered myself up to her on a silver platter. And then she graduated too at the end of the year.”

They laughed and he asked, “What’s the most partners you’ve had at once?”

She thought for a second and said, “Four.” I goggled at her and she smiled in happy remembrance. “Business expo. I hooked up with two gorgeous women I thought I’d never see again, and when we went back to my room my roommate was sixty-nining with a gorgeous redhead. It was truly a multicultural event. A blonde American, a redheaded Argentinian, a Japanese woman, a Pakistani woman, and yours truly. Every combination for three days and nights. And the business connections I made have actually been very useful, more than the crappy products on display.”

They were both laughing throughout this, and she asked, “Tell me about your lady love.”

“My crush.”

“Whatever.”

“She’s a math major, incredibly smart and fun. She has long curly black hair. Plump…well, solidly built.” She nodded. “I have to keep from staring at the beautiful Star of David she has hanging in her beautiful cleavage. You can only say it’s really pretty once without making it clear where you’re really staring. God, those tits.”

“Observant?”

“Rabbi’s daughter.”

“So what would the rabbi say if he knew what she’s doing?”

“She.”

“She?”

“The rabbi.”

She nodded with a smile, “Of course. What would her father say?”

“I dunno, but from what she says about her family, the rabbi’s wife would probably warn her to be careful.”

She laughed loudly at that. “Okay, okay, you got me.”

They sat there as they enjoyed another sip. For the next hour they talked in depth about their sex lives, becoming increasingly mellow, and finally she said, “I really do have you at a disadvantage.”

“How’s that?”

“Seeing you earlier. So intimately like that. It’s completely unfair.”

“As long as you enjoyed the sight, that’s fine.”

“No, it isn’t fair.” She stood and started undoing her blouse, and he sat up as stiffly as his cock had suddenly done. Soon her bra had dropped to the floor, her brown breasts sagging and as beautiful as he had dreamed. She then dropped her skirt and panties and stood before him, the vision he had desired so often freely offered to him, and she sat facing him on the couch, thighs spread, hips tilted to show him everything, and she stared into his eyes as she rubbed her lower lips amid the hairs. “I’m just repaying my debt,” she smiled, and worked herself vigorously for her pleasure and his.

As she approached her climax, he asked, “Did you like watching me?”

She nodded. “I shouldn’t have, but I did.”

“I’ve wanted to see this for so long.”

“Now you get to.”

“I’ve never seen a woman do this. In real life. No woman ever did it for me.”

“It’s a special gift.”

With a sudden gasp, her climax started, her hips thrusting against her hand moving in a blur, her scent filling the room along with her cries, and finally she lay there exhausted. She looked down and saw his cock sticking out through his unzipped zipper, and she smiled and said, “Go ahead, do it for me, let me see how much you loved my gift.”

He stood and stripped and sat across from her. She left her thighs open and smiled as he stared fixedly at her crevice, her lips still swollen and gaping open for him, and they flushed further as he glutted his eyes on her. She asked him, “How often have you thought about me?”

“Most nights.”

“When did you start?”

“Remember your visit? When I was in high school the first time?”

“Yes. I thought you acted a little strange around me.” They laughed. “What did you imagine the first time?”

“I imagined you posing for me like a centerfold, one of the beautiful black centerfolds I had.”

“I think I know the ones. I’m honored to be in such company.”

“But you were more beautiful than them, and you were real.”

“True.”

“They always kept their thighs shut. I wanted to open yours and see what was so special to be hidden like that.”

“A woman’s treasure. Like her mind, like her passion, shared only with someone special.”

“And then I imagined coming all over your breasts.”

She laughed, “You may.”

“I may…”

“Come here. Act out your first fantasy of me in reality. Show me how much you love this gift.”

He straddled her ribs with her help and lasted about twenty seconds before returning her gift. He stared, rapt at the breasts he had dreamed of enveloping most of his cock, held together by her hands so the nipples touched, her brown eyes devouring the sight of him wanting her, and she smiled as he suddenly fucked hard and fast into her soft flesh, chafing her as he pumped away madly and sprayed her neck and chin with his seed. The last few spurts were satisfied dribbles down her cleavage that pooled in a gray puddle on her throat with thick white streaks. He watched happily, feeling as if he had taken possession of her, and then she made space for him to lie next to her.

She gazed steadily into his eyes, seemed pleased by what she saw there, and said, “You’re an adult. We’re friends and we share a house, and now each other. I’m not yours. You’re not mine. Don’t think this is more than it is, and just enjoy what we have. You’ve wanted me for years and I’ve wanted you for months. Now you can make all your old fantasies come true and move on free in life.”

He nodded, “Yes.”

“Now kiss me, and make it worth my while.”

As they kissed he felt her breasts, squeezing their soft fullness, and she pushed one of his hands to feel her mount. As he rubbed her lightly, she asked, “Have you played with many?”

“No. It was always rushed. They told me basically to fuck them until they came and then let me come on their belly and we were done.”

“Then let me show you every secret of that treasure you dreamed of between the thighs of all those beautiful women you imagined loving.” She instructed him in explicit detail how to pleasure her and laughed when she saw the pride on his face after her first orgasm under his fingers. After a couple of minutes, she said, “And now the special lesson.” She had him kneel before her and finally impatiently demanded, “Lick me.”

“I just wanted to see you.”

“You have all the time in the world for that later. I need to get off.”

He knelt and licked and followed her orders with his tongue and lips and fingers. She held his head in place and said, “You swallow your own cum, so don’t get squeamish on me. I’m going to come hard, so don’t stop.”

He didn’t, and indeed he remained in place after she ravished his face with her hungry cunt, raising her to a second peak ten minutes later. She pulled him to her and reached down. She smiled when she felt his resurgent cock and teased, “I’m probably not as expert as you are, so we’ll just call it a night.”

“I want it more than anything.”

She smiled, “Of course you do.” She knelt before him and watched him like a connoisseur as he fell to pieces in her talented mouth, groaning when she took him into her throat and swallowing contentedly a minute later as he finally filled another mouth than his own.

They curled up together and she said, “How long do you need to rest?”

“Half an hour maybe.”

She nodded. “Let’s shower and go play in my bedroom. —Remember, you are not to tell anyone about us.”

“I know. I wonder what my mother would say?”

“She told me when I agreed to take you that if we became lovers, I was to take care of you.”

“What?”

“Your mother is much more realistic a woman than you seem to think. She accepts that you’re grown up and she thought this might happen. She grilled me when we discussed it and decided that if it happened with me, it was fine with her.”

“Was she like you in college?”

“In what way?”

“Well…open?”

“She had three boyfriends before she met your father. One each year, actually. She was straight as an arrow, but hardly a prude. She was very lucky in her love life.”

“Okay, that’s all I wanted to know. All. Nothing more, ever.”

“Good, because that’s all I’d tell you. All. Ever.”

They laughed and retired to the bathroom and then the bedroom, where they caressed and kissed until he was ready again. She took him into her and looked up at him nervous as he rested just inside her entrance. She said, “Slowly, take your time. I need it a long time this first time.”

“Like an hour?”

She laughed loudly, “God no. I’d wrestle you off me before half that was over. Last fifteen minutes and you’ll be golden.”

He slowly entered her as she watched him dreamily, and once he was inside her and moving slowly she asked, “Am I what you want?”

“Yes.”

“All those centerfolds, now you can experience what you wanted with them. No more frustrated dreams of beautiful brown skin. It’s like they set you up to be putty in my hands. Well, putty after you finish. Before then you’re like a pile driver.” They laughed and she said, “Soon you’ll have forgotten them and remember only me, and it will be so much healthier for you, a real woman with real affection and real friendship.”

He gloried in her soft, accepting body under his as it took every thrust he could give her and thrust back with interest; the glow of her golden-brown skin in the late afternoon sunlight surpassed the shades of all of his paper models of any color, and when her climax seized her after twenty minutes of mutual play, he held nothing back and watched her body proudly as he launched his sperm deep inside her, taking his pleasure finally in a woman worth taking.

He collapsed on her and she rubbed his hair and whispered, “And now you’re really my lover.”

“And now I’ve had a real lover. Not just some bored chick wanting a quick lay.”

“You enjoyed what you had with them.”

“Yes, but I enjoy it with you so much more.”

“You’d damn well better.”

The next morning they awoke at the same time. She looked searchingly in his face and relaxed when he smiled easily. “Good, it wasn’t just a drunken mistake.” They stayed in bed the rest of the weekend, ordering food for delivery and getting up enough energy to make coffee and sandwiches when they woke up late each morning. When they weren’t pleasuring each other, they talked:

“Did your father teach you Greek?”

She replied, “Of course not. His grandfather banned Greek from the household and his sons never learned it, so of course he couldn’t teach me.”

“Did it cause much of a stir, his marrying your mother?”

“No, not really. Ten years before it might have, but society had really changed by then, and they had changed with it.”

“Do you cook Greek food?”

“No. We can order out if you want. But you have to pay.”

Another time he asked, “Have you had much bullshit? Discrimination or silliness?”

“A little. I shut that shit down immediately. I get more grief for my tits.”

“Well, they are gorgeous. What are you, an E cup?”

She blinked and said, “Hell no. I’m a C cup most of the time.”

“I would have thought they were bigger.”

“They’re quite big enough, thank you. You’re looking at them from the front, where they spread out. From the side, you might be surprised how flat they look.” And so he posed her and found the front view most pleasing. She giggled as he showed her just how pleasing, and later, as he helped wipe her up, she said, “Toldja.”

“They’re perfect.”

She raised her eyebrow. “You just like having big brown tits to fuck.”

“You say that like it’s a bug, not a feature.”

“Hardly. You’re already hard again from just staring at them. That’s no bug.”

“You just like having a long hard cock to suck.”

“Pot, kettle,” she said as she lowered her head and let him entwine his fingers in her hair. Two minutes later she wiped the corner of her mouth and said, “That’s the fastest yet. I’m flattered.”

At one point she held him exhausted atop her and said, “You are of course free to take another lover instead of me when you find one. Just don’t lie about it. And I’ll tell you if I take another.”

“I doubt that will happen.”

“Don’t sell life so short. Life’s a funny bitch full of hilarious jokes.”

Monday was an early day for both of them. They dragged themselves out of bed at seven and showered together; they downed a pot of coffee and settled for instant oatmeal, and she dropped him off at campus early. He staggered to his first class and woke up halfway through. He had a quick early lunch and went off to his class with Sarah, hoping against hope that he would see her and that he would not. Fortunately and unfortunately, he saw her. She walked straight up to him, the deep-diving V of her blouse exposing the silver and ceramic of her beautiful pendant jostling at the top of her cleavage. He kept his eyes on her face and met her smile with his own. “Did you have a good weekend?”

He replied, “Yes.”

“So did I. So how’s everyone’s favorite physics major today?”

“I dunno, how is Terry?”

She giggled and said, “Terrific, but I was talking about you.”

“I’m hardly everyone’s favorite.” He smiled wickedly, “Look at our classmates. They’re kids. My appeal seems to skew older.”

She laughed with a surprised look and said, “Don’t worry, some of your classmates, I’m sure, lower the mean.”

He smiled and she grinned, “Okay, not just in class. Flattered you and insulted their intelligence. I’m a dangerous woman.”

They laughed and he replied, “The best kind.”

She sat next to him in class, which she had only done twice before, and after class, he walked with her toward the exercise fields as they talked freely about their classes and reading and likes and dreams. They separated reluctantly and he went to practice. Coach watched his efforts with a deeply critical look and finally said, “You slacked off all weekend, didn’t you?”

“I exercised some of my muscles.”

Coach laughed. “I’ll bet, but we compete in gymnastics, not fucking. Go run two extra laps and do the whole routine again when you’re done. Then clean up and be ready to work extra hard tomorrow.”

“Right, Coach.”

He finished well after the other guys and quickly showered alone and straightened up. He had put away the last mat when he heard the door open. He slowly walked to the storeroom door and stopped when he saw Sarah.

“Hi.”

“Hey. Question for you.”

“Yes?”

“If you have a great opportunity, what would you do?”

“I’d make sure it was a great opportunity and seize the day.”

“Really?”

“Really.”

“Now that puzzles me. You don’t seem that kind of guy.”

“Why do you say that?”

She smiled and walked up to him. She stopped smiling, cocked her head to one side, stared into his eyes for a minute, and asked, “If you’re such a seize-the-day kind of guy, why didn’t you join Terry and me Friday?”

“I didn’t know I was wanted.”

“Why didn’t you ask?”

“I didn’t want to…ruin your fun.”

“So you just watched us.” She thought for a second. “Was it a good sight?”

“Incredible.”

“Yes, we are.” She looked down at the throbbing bulge in his shorts and raised her eyebrow. “You’re always staring at my tits. And always getting hard from looking at them. You probably see my nipples really hard all the time.” I nodded. “That’s because I always watch you. Especially your cock. Girls are so much less obvious than boys.”

By this point, she was only inches from him. Her breath brushed his lips and she leaned in, then pulled back before he closed his eyes, and asked, “Was I beautiful? My body?”

“Incredible. The best.”

She smiled. “Everyone goes gaga for scrawny blondes. I like a man who goes gaga over me.” She leaned in again, her breath brushing his cheek, but pulled back just before their lips touched. “Did you like my skills?”

“You mean…” He stared fixedly into his eyes and nodded almost imperceptibly. “I couldn’t get the image out of my mind all day.”

“Yeah, and I couldn’t get the taste out of my mouth all day.” They chuckled and she said, “Good thing I like the taste.”

She leaned in again, her breath brushing his other cheek, and then pulled back. “You know, Jewish girls are the best lovers.” She leaned in, almost touched her lips to his, and pulled back to say, “At least in my experience.”

He looked into her eyes and she winked, then leaned in again. Her breath brushed his ear and she pulled back. “All this time I’ve been wondering when you’d ever see me.”

“I saw you the first time I set eyes on you.”

“And did nothing.”

“You were too beautiful.”

“You’re forgiven.” She leaned in and her breath brushed his other ear, then she pulled back. “I’m careful. I’m on the pill, I have a clean bill of health. I’ve had many lovers. That doesn’t bother you?”

“No.”

“Are you very experienced?”

“Not really.”

“You will be. If you say yes.”

She leaned in and his lips formed a yes against hers, and she giggled and opened her mouth to his. As on Friday, she stripped quickly and had little use for foreplay when very excited; this time she was drenched and pushed his head between her thighs before he had much chance to explore her breasts to the full. She pulled him above her and took him deep into her throat as he sucked her thoroughly, and in her excitement, she came quickly three times, then slammed her thighs closed as she worked him fully into her. He grunted, “I’m coming,” and she only opened wider and pulled on his ass. With a flash, it seemed, his orgasm washed all over him, his cock draining into her swallowing throat.

Finally, she let him go and lay back as he explored her body happily, her breasts fascinating him. She giggled as she watched him harden and lay back to let him inside her. As he pushed into her, he asked, “Are you and Terry an item?”

“Of course.”

“So you’re cheating on him.”

“No, not really,” she chuckled.

“So what counts as cheating with you? Anal?”

She laughed, “No, that counts as the dessert of a good meal.”

“So why isn’t this cheating?”

A voice above them said, “It isn’t cheating if we decided to do exactly what we’re all doing.”

Ted looked up, “Oh, hi, Terry.”

Terry stood there nude and fully erect. “So, who wants this?”

Ted grinned, “Me, me, me!”

They laughed and Sarah said, “We didn’t know if you were that way, but we figured you probably were.”

Terry knelt before them and put his cock within easy distance of Ted’s mouth. “Have you ever done this before?”

“Only myself.”

Sarah’s eyes opened wide for the first time and she gasped, “I should have gone for a gymnast sooner! This I have to see.”

With a tilt of his head and extension of his neck, Ted took Terry’s cock into his mouth, and as he explored it happily, not a trace of guilt in his mind, Sarah stared up at him and swiftly boiled over. Her spasming cunt pushed Ted over the edge, and the sight of both of them climaxing pushed Terry over the edge as well. His spurts were copious and tasty, and Ted swallowed easily.

Sarah stared at him. “We’ve wanted a man to join us who is willing to play with both of us. I dreamed of a man giving me as much cum as he was getting from Terry. No net change of mass for the lucky, lucky guy.”

They all laughed. Ted said, “We need to get going. Soon another team will be in here. We have half an hour.”

Sarah said, “Yes, we know the schedule. Is it all cleaned for them?”

“Yes. We just need to dress and split.”

They quickly left and got to Ted’s house soon after. They went around to the back and marched quickly into Ted’s room. Terry was about to close the door when Ted said, “No, leave it open.” Terry shrugged and they turned to watch Sarah undress. She then watched happily as they undressed for her, and they fell into a circle, Ted sucking Sarah as Terry sucked him. They sucked happily, coming to a leisurely orgasm each and then changing direction. Sarah came again quickly and extricated herself; she sat there watching her men sixty-nine until sounds in the front of the house made her sit up quickly.

The men heard nothing, however; Terry was on the edge, and his first spurt shot into the back of Ted’s mouth as Sally’s deep voice said, “Well, hello, boys and girls.” Ted finished Terry off, rejoicing in another load of his seed, and then sat up and smiled at Sally.

“Right on time, I see.”

Sally smiled almost imperceptibly and said, “So it would appear.”

“I have company.”

“I see. Shall I…?”

Ted stared into her eyes as a smile spread over her face. She looked at the three of them and asked, “May I join you?”

“Please do. That’s why I left the door open.”

Terry pulled away and said, “I’ll just watch for a while. Ted and Sarah drained me dry.”

Sally stripped quickly and went straight for Sarah, who smiled happily. Sally kissed her and held up her star. “So you’re the rabbi’s daughter.”

“I am one of many daughters of many.”

“You’re probably the most beautiful one.”

“Yes, most likely.”

She chuckled into Sally’s mouth, and as Sally caressed her and worked her mouth down to her breasts, Sarah said, “You know, Jewish girls are the best lovers. In my experience.”

Sally said from her belly, “In my experience, there are two Japanese women, an Argentinian woman as Catholic as the day is long, an Episcopalian nun, and at least one Baptist and one Pakistani atheist woman who were better than my Jewish girlfriends. You have some serious competition.” She then tongued her navel and added before moving further down, “And that’s not even counting me.”

Sarah’s eyes had widened increasingly as she went through the list, and she finally murmured, “Well, I might have to tell everyone that black is best.”

“No, it’s mostly my Greek side. Sappho was one of us, you know,” and then her head sank between Sarah’s thighs. She simply lifted her hips as Ted came up behind her and helped him aim straight into her, and he marveled at the heat and wetness he found inside her. Sarah lasted five minutes and Sally came soon after Sarah did, and Sarah moved away as Terry took her place. She sucked him rapidly and efficiently and received his spunk after three minutes of oral skills that left him awestruck and exhausted and Sarah’s skills in a distant second.

Sarah came back and played with Sally’s breasts as Ted took his time, and soon she had moved into position under Sally to sixty-nine with her as Ted worked her hard. Sarah licked his shaft as he thrust deeply and chuckled when he came. He pulled away and sat beside Terry as they watched the two women devouring each other. When they had hardened a last time, they sixty-nined beside the women and all four had their last climaxes almost simultaneously.

The four cleaned up quietly and cooked dinner together, then collapsed on the couch. Sally asked, “So, has either of you done that before?”

They shook their heads in exhausted contentment.

“Do you want to do it some more? In the future?”

They grinned giddily and nodded like two bobbleheads.

Sally said, “Good. That was one of my best foursomes. The best with men. I like both of you a lot. You’re experienced enough and up for me. Physically you’re both drop-dead gorgeous. So remember, no jealousy, no blabbing to anyone—anyone at all—and no stupid sex outside our quartet.”

Sarah snuggled up to her and said, “You’re so beautiful. I’d do anything to keep things like this.”

They chatted and recuperated, and before bedtime were ready for a last hurrah. With a grin, Sarah said, “I have one last fantasy. Ted needs dessert.” He thought for a second and then blinked, and Sarah mounted Terry and smiled back at me, “Look in my purse.”

She looked over at Sally, who shook her head. “Not my scene.”

“I have a mouth all ready for use…”

Sally smiled and crouched in front of her. Sarah licked happily at her hairy mount, and then more deeply as Ted slowly worked his way into her. It was tight and a bit dry, and it was mostly the pleasure she showed in taking him into her and the sheer reputation of the act that triggered his desire, and all but Terry came quickly. Terry stood there erect and close, and Sarah whispered, “It’s better to give than to receive.” Ted chuckled and leaned over and with relatively little pain and then massive pleasure let Terry have dessert.

Ted remained hard but wanted only Sally. It was late and Sarah and Terry took the extra bedroom while Ted shared the honor of Sally’s bed. As he lay there after washing up, she said, “You liked buggering her, didn’t you?”

“It was…different. I like her, so it was good.”

“How was it being fucked?”

“I liked it a lot.”

She smiled. “I lied down there. We need dessert too. But it’s only for you, not for Terry. Our own special treat. They are never to know, just us.”

“You want it?”

“Lover, I want you. Seeing you with them made me so jealous, but you wanted me to join in. That washed it all away. Like a present for us together to enjoy. A banquet. Whatever Sarah does for you, I will do a hundred times better.” She crouched before him and helped him get her ready, and then she groaned happily as he worked slowly and carefully into her. Unlike Sarah, taking her that way was pure pleasure for both of them, and every stroke was engraved on their memory. She whispered, “Only special men get this. Only special men make me want it.”

“It’s so much better than Sarah.”

“Your cock feels so good there.”

“I never thought this could be so perfect.”

They moaned as they worked to a fever pitch, and as they climaxed, they said at the same time, “I love you, I love you so much.”

They lay there in exhaustion and she finally chuckled. “What did I tell you about life? Just full of jokes of every sort.”

“This must be one of her better ones.”

She chuckled, “Just wait until you tell your mother. I’m not sure how funny she’ll find it.”

“I’m not telling her any time soon.”

In fact, it was only a year later when Sally agreed to marry him, or he said yes to her offer—neither was quite sure of the sequence of events apart from being inspired by Terry and Sarah tying the knot in a surprise civil ceremony and enjoying a four-person honeymoon—that they breathed word of it to her, and it did, in fact, take a month for her to find it funny; his father had an even worse sense of humor, but had been reconciled to it by the time Ted led his new bride down the aisle and out of the chapel.