My Story About My Addiction To Cock free porn video

Note: I had to start with Chapter 4 of my story because that begins after I've already turned 18. But there was plenty of fun to tell about before that. Anyway, everything written here is 100% true and about my life and sexual experiences from age 18 until my early/mid-20's.

Chapter Four

When I was 18 is when I came out to everyone, although no one was surprised and I think I always had that "cocksucker" look about me. It was shortly after I had met a guy named Joey who did gay porn. I won't reveal his stage name, out of respect, but I will say he was in his 20's, Italian, with black hair and blue eyes and very hot. We met through a party line and I drove to his flat where he lived with his partner who was in his 40's and flirted with me a lot. But that night when we first met, he'd had another guy over around the same age as him and they got naked and had me service both of them. It was so hot and I had never serviced two guys before. They kept having me take turns, going back and forth, sucking them, licking their balls and they both squirted their hot loads into my mouth.

One time when I went over there, Joey had to take off for a few minutes and I was there alone with his partner, I think his name was John or Jack....but we were in the living room and he was just wearing a robe. We were watching TV, but I could see him casually let his robe open up a bit so I could see his cock and he kept running his thumb along it. I wanted him to say something to me, but he didn't and pretended he was watching what was on the tube. I was going to make a move, but then Joey came back and John (or Jack or whatever) must have gotten scared because he closed his robe and started flipping channels. Whatever.

I also learned about an adult video store in San Mateo that had video booths, which I went to so I could watch some hot porn. Little did I know until that first night that there would be guys cruising the maze of booths and leaving their doors open a crack. So, I figured this was a golden opportunity for me and I went into a booth and dropped quarters in to play the video channels and within a minute or two, a man peeked into my booth. I let him an and locked the door. He opened his fly and pulled out his cock to let me suck it and in seconds he was pumping his hot goo down my throat. I made several trips to this video store, either going inside or sitting in my car just outside as men would walk by. There were some nights I would go and give head to anywhere from 3 to 8 men in one night. Older, bigger, smaller, Indian, Black, White, Latin. You name it! It was like a cock smorgasbord for me. When I'd sit in my car, guys would cruise slowly by in their cars and if there was an attraction, I'd follow them somewhere dark and blow them in their car. Or, they'd walk by my car and look in, so I'd have them get in and we'd talk a few minutes and then soon I would take us somewhere out of the way to suck them off. Some would suck my cock, too, but back then I was a total bottom slut and hadn't learned the thrill of being a top. (Don't get me wrong, I'll always be a cocksucker in a huge way, but I really like fucking ass now).

That was also the year I met Richard, a really handsome latin guy in his 20's who I had a huge crush on. I picked him up, as he was thumbing a ride one night to this gay bar in San Mateo that's no longer there, called "B" Street (on actual B Street) and there was a lesbian bar upstairs too. So, we talked as I drove him there and before I dropped him off, we made out for a few minutes and we exchanged numbers.

Richard and I hooked up again not too long after and he had me over his grandmother's house in Redwood City where he lived in this little house behind her house that was once his grandfather's storage "house" that he converted into his own pad. Richard was a lot of fun and we smoked weed together. He turned me on to this group called Mazzy Star whose CD we played over and over that night and then finally all stoned he layed back on his futon mattress on the floor and let me give him head. It was hot and his cum tasted so damn good, but I really had a crush on him and it didn't seem like he was headed in that direction. He was very free-spirited and in no way ready to settle on just one guy. I was still so young yet too and had no idea what a relationship involved.

So, we became good friends. He introduced me to the nude beach at San Gregorio, where when we got there he stripped right down to nothing and ran right into the ocean. He was great to look at and a beautiful example of manhood. He also got me into B-Street because he knew a guy who worked at the door and I was just told to be casual, not order any alcoholic drinks and blend in with the crowd. The place was dimly lit and large so it was easy to be incognito and have a good time. It was such a great place with a big dance floor and the music was awesome. Richard would instantly start mingling and so I would hang out and check out guys. I was a little shy there and so they would usually come up to me and start talking. I ended up going home with a few of them and was having a great time.

One night at B-Street, I met John and he invited me to his house...with him and his wife Judy. So, I thought, why not’ They were nice and in their 40s and he looked like the lead guitarist from Aerosmith. We went back to their house and they turned on some porn, got naked, served cocktails and introduced me to crank. Wow, did that get me amp'ed and I started talking 50 miles an hour about how much I loved cock. Judy wanted to see me suck her husband's cock, so John stood in front of me and I sucked him. Judy then put on a strap-on and pretended like she was stoking her "cock". Then she sucked my cock as John had me suck his cock. I couldn't stop looking at the porn too and the scenes they had playing were so nasty with a lot of pissing and cumshots. We partied and messed around until the next morning and I went home as the sun came up in a bit of a haze, baffled about what had gone on all night. We kept in touch and got together a couple more times. They'd have me over for dinner, then take me to B-Street for a drink (well, they'd drink), then we'd go back to their place and do some crank and mess around. It was fun, but we all moved on after the 3rd time.



Chapter Five

The year I was 19, it was 1992. I was out of high school and working at a restaurant in San Bruno as a busboy. It was quite the year, indeed. One that will remain in my mind forever, for so many reasons.

After work, I had a tendency to go out cruising in my car, which would be anywhere from 11 at night, or sometimes I wouldn't go cruising until 2am, depending on when my shift ended. In any case, I had the habit of driving all the way from there in San Bruno, down to Santa Clara on El Camino Real, scouting for men who might need a ride (and hopefully so much more). My luck was pretty good, actually. There were a few guys who would look into my rolled-down passenger window after I'd pull up and offer a ride and they'd grimace at me and mutter things like "fuckin' faggot, get the hell out of here". Eh, so I'd drive off and they'd be forgotten about. It was their loss!

While there were those few and select killjoy's out there, there were double the men who did take me up on my flirting and offers for blowjobs. I remember one of them I actually met at a stoplight who was on a bicycle and I still offered him a ride. He was in his late 30's about and scruffy, with a semi-goatee and dirty blonde hair. So he got his bike into the back of my 1984 goldtone Toyota Corolla and we drove somewhere dark and he pulled his cock out of his black jeans and said I should really be more careful doing this shit, but then he pushed my head down and forced his cock into my mouth and started fucking it so hard that I was gagging, but he kept ramming it and holding my head down so I couldn't pull up from what he was doing and said to me "you got a little bit more than you were bargaining for aren't you’" in a panting voice and fucking my face with his balls pushing into my chin. I was drooling all over his balls. When he came, I remember he jerked so much that his cum filled my mouth and went up into my nostrils, which I sucked all down and swallowed. We then had a cigarette and parted ways.

I remember another guy named Nick in his later 20's who sat back and let me suck him off at leisure, who fed me two loads in a row. He was hot and a real nice guy. I ended up taking him out for breakfast after, it was like 4 in the morning at the time. I really enjoyed that experience, especially the very deep conversation we got into and I'll always be grateful to him for that time.

There was another guy who I met who was bi-sexual, I do forget his name. However, he was bi and had me over his place to suck his cock while his Filipino girlfriend was out. I remember he liked going to Reno, NV a lot to play blackjack. Sucking his cock was hot and he was very hot. Italian guy with a big cock and he laid back on his bed and pumped my mouth full of his cock until he had me gulp down his creamy load. I went back a couple of times to see him, but on the last visit was when his girlfriend came home and started banging on the locked bedroom door, yelling and screaming in Tagalog. He was laughing and had me keep sucking his cock until we both heard a huge shattering of glass. So, he got up, pulled up his shorts and went into the living room to find that his girlfriend had smashed a huge vase right through the glass coffee table out of anger and she was yelling at us both. I inched my way out of the bedroom and finally got out the door, fearing she'd try to kill me. I was so glad to have left, although I never got to see the guy again. He did call once and left a message on my parents' answering machine. He sounded drunk and said he was in Reno and that he missed seeing me. That was the last I'd heard from him.

There was one night when I picked a man up after work and I still had my uniform on from work. He had obviously had a bit to drink. So, I flirted with him and asked if there was anything he "wanted" (my usual come-on line) and he said "what do you have in mind"‘ So, I made my usual proposition of "how about some head’" and he accepted. However, when I finally found a place to park where it was dark and more remote, we started making out and when he put his hand down my pants, he stopped, backed off and started to freak out. "You're a guy’’’" He was obviously a little pissed off and I said "Yeah, what did you think I was’" and he replied, "I thought you were just an ugly woman!" And then he made me drive around while he shouted obscene things at me, threatening that he ought to kill me and I was panicking and crying and I finally made up the story that I had a wife and a son (yeah-right) at home and please not to hurt me. Well, after about an hour of driving around scared to death and having my gas tank nearly on empty, he had me pull over at a gas station and he got out and that's when I sped-off, driving away like a maniac.

But...did that stop me’ Noooooooo. I went out the next night and was cruising around. It wasn't long after that experience that I met Steve, a married man in his 40's who lived at a motel on the San Mateo/Belmont border where the lights of it just said "otel" (which he and I had called the "no-tell, o-tell") and his wife was apparently in the county jail. Steve was a man I picked up while driving around one night after work So, he took me to his room at the "otel" and introduced me to smoking cocaine (or, crack...) It was a freaky high that made me very alert and talk very rapidly. It was fun but it also made me quite a bit paranoid. He'd like to sit on the bed and do drawings and I'd sit and stare at him until finally I asked if he wanted a blowjob. He said "sure" and so I leaned over on the bed and he pulled down his sweats and briefs and I went down on him. I'd suck him for a while and then he'd want to hit the pipe and had me do the same, then I'd suck him some more. I ended up visiting him for a few nights to suck his dick until one night when he had me drive him down to East Palo Alto (the crack neighborhood) and little did I know when he was making his deal, that he had a bunch of Geoffrey Money from Toys R Us folded into a $20.00 bill. Well, that didn't make the street dealers too happy and we ended up getting chased by them in a black car onto the 101 freeway and I was dodging in and out of the light traffic there was while they chased us down, shooting at my car!!! They also through a big rock or something at the side because when it was over I saw a big dent in the side of the car. Yes, we finally managed to lose them. Meanwhile, I chewed Steve's ass out for that. However, I went back the next night to him at the motel and discovered his wife was there and that she had just been released from jail that night. So, that was the end of that.

Not long after that whole experience and after recovering from the comedown of having been high off and on for several days, I went out cruising again. I ended up at the adult bookstore in San Mateo I'd been to so many times before, which is where I met Gary, in one of the video booths. I sucked his cock for a while and then he invited me to his room at the Super 8 Motel. So, I followed him there (in his black Rolls Royce). I was impressed! Gary was in his 40's as well and married with k**s and had a house in Half Moon Bay apparently. So, we got to the room and he turned on a porn video of some really hot straight gangbang scenes (there was a VCR in the room) and then whipped out a baggie of cocaine, pouring a bit onto the table and chopped it up. He then offered me a line. Dare I’ Yes, I dare. So, I sniffed up the white powder and instantly felt my heart race and I became a total horndog. We then got naked and he sat back on the bed and had me crawl up and start sucking his cock. I must have sucked him for an hour straight and then we did another line of coke and he had me get on all fours at the edge of the bed, he lubed up his cock and stuck it right up my ass. He fucked me good and I was loving it! He'd go in real deep, grabbing my sides and pumpin in harder and harder, until a while later when he groaned and bucked his hips into me and spewed his hot load into my anus.

After that, we were getting together every day. He would drive me around or I would drive him around and he would have me stop in various places that were private and have me give him head. I was a total cock whore for him and he really enjoyed that. We'd also get motel rooms here and there, mostly along the coast around Pacifica. I really don't know what he was telling his wife he was doing all this time, but I also really didn't care. I was having too much fun!

There finally came a point where things got a little weird and he started becoming paranoid. I figured it was all the coke he was doing, but then I began to get paranoid because it felt like when we were driving that we were being followed. Well, it turns out that this was probably true, based on what happened next.

He picked me up from my parents' house where I was still living at the time in his Rolls Royce and said he was taking me to Lake Tahoe for the weekend. I was thrilled! My mom figured that since he drove a nice car and was older that he was mature and responsible. Boy, was that not true! We drove up to Lake Tahoe and it became night as we entered the snowy mountains. I was pretty coked up and remember that everything seemed surreal and the snow everywhere seemed to glow in the dark. Everything looked icy and somewhat creepy. We finally got to a motel along the way and I was relieved. So, we got into fooling around and doing lines and he'd have me suck his cock endlessly. I remember him having me bent over the sink in front of the huge mirror and fucked me up the ass really good and I was able to look at him pumping into me and it really got me off. I jazzed like crazy onto the countertop and he shot his wad right up my ass, as usual.

The next day, however, he said he had to go and he'd be back later. At first, I was okay with it, but then hours began to pass and there was no sign of him. So, I began to get paranoid. I remember closing the curtains in the room tight and imagining that there were police cars surrounding the motel and that my parents were outside trying to get me to come out, until I opened the curtains and said that I surrendered, only there was no one there, I was just too high at the time. It was then that I somehow passed out, because I had been up for a couple of days and it had caught up with me. I awoke to Gary finally returning to the room all high himself and he seemed nervous, but when I asked him what was going on, he said "nothing" and got the coke out and started putting some out on the dresser. It was minutes later when there was a knock at the door. It was the police. Apparently what was going on was Gary was wanted by the FBI for something having to do with hijacking slot machines (which he was apparently doing when he'd left the room for so long) and also for Grand Theft Auto of the Rolls we drove up in and also for several thousand dollars' worth of cut gemstones in the glove box that he'd stolen. At first, they thought I was his accomplice, but then realized I was just a scared young man. They did arrest me, however, for being under the influence of narcotics and I spent the night in jail. It seems that Gary got himself bailed out and left me there to fend for myself, so that was the last I ever saw of him.

The next morning, I had to walk in my t-shirt and jeans in the snow for 5 miles from the jail to where the motel was to get my belongings, which was an ordeal in itself because the Indian owners of the motel were reluctant to give my belongings to me because i was a "bad man" so they said. Then, I called my cousin Noel wondering what to do and she called my parents and explained things to them more calmly than I would have. So, I was wired some money to take a Greyhound back and headed back to San Francisco. The bus pulled into the Greyhound station and there were my parents peering at me in the window of the bus and I read my mom's lips saying "You dumb son-of-a-bitch!" Oooh were they mad. I was a shit, wasn't I’

I ended up having to go up to Tahoe twice for court hearings and ended up being given a misdemeanor and made to do 6 weeks on a d**g diversion program. It was the only time I've ever been in jail (thankfully!) and that was enough for me! The only good part of it in the end was that my parents took me up to Tahoe for the hearings and my mom got to play slot machines and jokingly said to me "This is fun, I guess it wasn't all bad!" My mom cracks me up.


Chapter Six

One more thing happened when I was 19 that still lingers in my mind actually in an amazingly erotic way. I k** you NOT, this, like all of what I am telling you about, is TRUE. I was driving around again one night and picked up this guy who was thumbing a ride. He was in his late 30’s or early 40’s and he was handsome and rugged, with a buzzed head and goatee. But he was scary in a way and I didn’t know what to make of him. I thought I would be flirting but I was almost afraid to because I didn’t know whether or not he would freak out. He lived in a motel in San Mateo and I was telling me how he’d been released from San Quentin Prison not long ago so he was in transition. Anyway, we got to his motel, it was one of those long motels that was one floor and several individual units that went way back. I asked to use his bathroom to take a piss and so he let me come in. When I was done, I came out of the bathroom and he was smoking something out of a glass pipe, which I was guessing was crack. I didn’t say anything and I remembered from my prior experience with the guy at the motel before that I didn’t have any interest in smoking that again myself. So then he oddly told me that he had a gun in his closet and I looked at him and said ‘O-kay’’’’ And he said if I wanted to see it I could. I was getting scared and said ‘No, that’s okay’. He then squeezed his crotch in his tight black jeans and said ‘You like to fool around’’ Scared, I don’t know what came over be but I said ‘What do you mean’’ I was even stuttering. He said ‘you and me, we’re gonna fool around’. I kept thinking about the gun and said to him ‘I gotta go’. And he said, ‘Get your clothes off.’ I said ‘Really, I gotta go.’ And he got in front of the door and I sat down on the edge of one of the bed nearest the door. At this point I started to cry and he said loudly ‘Shut up!’ and smacked me across the face. He then started to strip off his clothes, exposing a normal length, but quite fat cock. I started crying even more but put my hand over my mouth to muffle the sound, so as not to anger him. He made me strip out of my clothes and he sat on the bed and made me get on the side of him and forced my head down on his cock. He started to face fuck me and said ‘Come on, suck it! My mouth was aching and I was gagging and he then pulled my head off his cock and told me to hold still as he got behind me and raised up my leg on my side. He then made me guide his cock to my hole and I said ‘no’please!’ I was genuinely petrified! But once the tip of his cock found my asshole, he grabbed onto me to hold me still and forced his cock into my ass. I literally saw stars then and felt the pain as he penetrated my hole deeper and deeper, making it start to bleed. It actually only lasted all of a couple of minutes before he shuddered and quietly grunted a couple of times to himself and I didn’t know what had happened and I said ‘Did you cum’’ and he said ‘Mmmm hmmmm’. When he pulled out and stood up, he got mad. There was blood and cum and some shit on his cock and he yelled at me ‘now look what the fuck you did, clean off my goddamn cock!’ and he had me get a washcloth and wet it and then get on my knees and clean off his still semi-erect cock. I then was able to wipe myself as clean as I could, but still felt my asshole gaping and oozing his huge load of cum. I felt violated and disgusting. Before he allowed me to leave, he made me give him my driver’s license and he wrote down my address which was of my parents’ house where I still lived and told me that if the cops came for him from me telling about what just happened, he’d make sure that one way or another I’d be sorry. So, I was freaked out by this and never did tell a soul about it. I remember driving home and it was raining. The sun was about to come up and I felt my ass still gaping and I was trying to tighten it and his cum made my asshole all slimy and oozy. The strange thing is that I felt oddly aroused by it afterwards and now for years I have jacked-off remembering that night. I guess I’ve become more jaded as I’ve gotten older.

So when I was 20, I met a guy named Brown and he was one year younger than me. We had an awesome connection, although we only had sex a couple of times. However, our adventures were many and very hot. We considered ourselves boyfriends for a while, but then decided it was better as just being friends.

Brown and I used to go out cruising guys together. We went one night to a sex club on 6th street in the SOMA district of San Francisco, which was inside of a warehouse. It wasn’t a legal sex club and it posed as the Church of the Cock. It was run by a man named Father Frank and he preached the Sermon of the Cock at midnight and served hot dogs. He also had beer and wine available until 4am and you could smoke pot and do coke there, as well. You rang a bell when you got there and someone would let you in. You paid $7.00 and were led up a flight of stairs. After that, we were free to enjoy! There were rooms with mattresses and videos playing where men were sucking and fucking each other. There was also a maze with glory holes everywhere. Brown and I split up inside and I wound up in the glory hole maze for about 2 hours, sucking off as many cocks and drinking down as much cum as I could. I remember there were these two hot guys who were both trying to get in my mouth one after another, and at the same time. One had brown hair, a buzz cut and that’s what I remember of him and the other was a blonde guy with glasses. Both were somewhere in their 20’s. The blonde guy came in my mouth twice after face fucking me. They both were on my side of the glory hole and so they had me backed into a wall and kept coming up to grab hold of my head and pump their cocks in my mouth. It was so damn hot and I was jerking my cock like crazy as I fed on their hard meat. Later, when Brown and I met back up, he looked like he’d had his fill, as well. We did go back again the next night, but unfortunately it had been raided and closed down and there was a note on the door. Apparently, this usually happened to Father Frank and he’d go to jail for a while, then get out and re-open the club in another location. We did go to his next club about 8 months later and it was in a Victorian house in the Castro, but it wasn’t as good.

Brown and I also used to like to pay visits to a guy named Michael, a paralegal in his mid-40’s, who liked his vodka, but he was quite hot. A hairy guy, wore glasses and could fuck like nobody’s business. Brown and I would go over there together and get naked and he’d take turns fucking us in front of each other and we’d all suck each other off. I even went back to see Michael several times alone to get fucked. He really knew how to jackhammer a guy’s ass and he’d kick his spunk right up into it every time. He’d get really sweaty too and our bodies would get all slippery and wet. Fucking loved it!

Brown and I also went once to the windmills out at Ocean Beach and went walking along the paths out there in Golden Gate Park. We had been out all night and it was just starting to get light out. Well, what started was something I’d never even imagined would happen. It started with seeing one guy and we cruised him and followed him into this bushy area. We started taking turns sucking his cock, then another guy came along, then another guy and before we knew it, there were 6 of us chain-sucking each other’s cocks. It was so hot and I was totally getting off on it. We were all moaning and groaning and pumping our cocks in and out of each other’s mouths until we were all feeding one another our hot seed. I remember being a bit lightheaded after that experience and very fulfilled.

Yet another thing Brown and I did was drive down to L.A. for a weekend. We had no money to get a room and decided to just have all the sex we could find and then head home. We ended up dropping acid and hanging out at Santa Monica beach, where we laughed our asses off and even imagined Yoko Ono rising up out of the ocean waves like the Kraken from that mythological movie. We had this Yoko Ono thing going on and used to plot to find her and hang out with her. It was so hilarious and we were so juvenile. We ended up finding a major cruising area in Hollywood, too, and of all places RIGHT UNDER the Hollywood sign on the mountain! There are guys all over that area, it’s a park, and we sucked quite a few cocks there one day and had ours sucked plenty. Now every time I see that sign I think to myself ‘Yeah, I know what’s happening there!’ It was a great trip, with the exception of getting a flat tire on the way back way out in the middle of nowhere in the mountains along highway 101. We ended up having to walk to get AAA to come tow my car, which it did, into Salinas. Do you know how hard it is to find a place that will replace a tire on a Sunday’ At least back then it was hard. But we did find a place and I had $28.00 left and the guy at the gas station gave us a used tire for that and put it on. We had some awesome Mexican food in town, but we were the only white guys in the place and were being stared at by everyone. By the time we got back, we were totally exhausted, hung over from sex, acid and being up for way too long.

Brown and I also used to get together with other guys and play with them together. I remember another guy who we met at Collingwood Park in the Castro one night in his 40’s who was on coke and he gave us each a ‘key hit’ of it and had us take turns sucking his cock right by the fence of the park.

It was a great friendship and we had these adventures for several months. Then, he met a guy from the south named Craig and that tapered off as they got more serious.

Also when I was 20, I started working at a department store at the mall in men’s furnishings and there was a black guy in his 40’s or 50’s and he worked in the men’s shoe department and he liked young white boys like myself. So, one Sunday morning when it was slow, he lured me into the back of the shoe stock area and pulled out his huge cock and I mean it was HUGE and had me start sucking it. It was so damn big that my mouth began to cramp after a while. He also invited me after work to his apartment to mess around and I started to suck his cock and again, my mouth cramped up, so he got me bent over his couch and used some Vaseline on his big tool and worked it up as much as he could into my ass. I remember it really hurt going in, but he kept making short pumps in and out and grunting and groaning until he pulled out and spewed cum all over my ass. My hole was gaping and I remember wondering if it would ever close up again!

I had a friend named Aaron who worked at the department store with me who I met while I was working and he worked across from me in men’s sportswear. The first time we saw each other he was squinting at me, which I learned moments later that he didn’t like wearing his glasses and that made me laugh. He was 24 at the time. We became fast friends and had a lot of fun together. We went to clubs in the Castro that I was able to get into without being carded, which were few. Oh, and the Stud on 9th street was another place. We would go dancing and meet guys. He was shocked one night because I was making out with one guy and then the guy left and at one point Aaron had to go to the bathroom and when he came out another guy was sucking on my neck and I was saying ‘Oh, it’s been so long’ and Aaron gave me a look of horror and shock. Aaron also named me ‘Sex on Wheels’ after the song by My Life with the Thrill Kill Cult because of the way I cruised around at night.



Chapter Seven

My friend Aaron who I mentioned in the previous installment of my story was also famous for giving me another nickname, which some still call me after I tell them the story I’m about to tell you. One night when Aaron and I were out at one of the Castro bars (I was still 20 years old at the time) I met a man who took me to his place nearby and when I came back to re-connect with Aaron, I was giddy and excited. I said ‘Guess what’’’’ and Aaron rolled his eyes and said ‘Oh god, what’’ I continued on to say ‘The guy I just gave a blowjob to said I have a mouth like velvet.’ Well, after that, Aaron nearly pissed his pants he laughed so hard and from then on I was often known by the nickname of ‘Velveeta’, because I was the cheesiest.

In San Mateo, Aaron had been living with a man named Steven who gave him a break on part of his rent in exchange for sex, which I found quite hot. Anyway, one weekend Steven was away and I stayed there at the apartment with Aaron. I ended up talking on a phone chat line to guys and Aaron would listen and giggle at me. But then I met a man who was in his mid-50’s and married, who ended up coming over to the apartment and Aaron let us use Steven’s room. Well, the older man fucked me up the ass and we apparently left a little streak on the sheets, which neither of us noticed. So, after Steven returned, I got a call from Aaron telling me how Steven had a shitfit when he found the streak on his bed and that I wasn’t allowed to go over there anymore. Whoops! I did see the older man a few more times. Once, he took me to these private hot tubs in the east bay area and we had a very nasty time in the heated water, jets pushing into my ass as he pinned me up against the tub and was making out with me while I stroked his erection and mine under the water. He then sat on the edge of the tub and had me suck his dripping wet cock and lick his soaked balls until he decided to get back into the water and fuck me in the ass as he reached around and jerked my cock until I ejaculated into the chlorinated water and then he spurted his jizz into my hungry hole and then the water cleaned me after he pulled out.

Aaron eventually moved from San Mateo to a shared flat on Elgin Park, an alley-type street in the city off of Duboce. He had also left the department store somewhere in that time and started working at a clothing store and a muffin shop on Castro. I remember one night we went out and then went back to his flat and after I left, I walked down the street and met a man standing there cruising me. He was deaf, but indicated for me to follow him upstairs to his flat. So, I went up and though he could not hear or speak, we had a very intense session of sucking each other’s cocks and locking lips and sucking tongues for quite a while. It was very, very hot. He and I saw each other a few other nights the same way and he’d have me up for some more.

Just before I turned 21, I got a job with Aaron at the muffin shop on Castro, now no longer there, but those of you who were around the Castro in 1993/4 will know which one I am talking about. Aaron and I had a great time working together again and I enjoyed making him laugh by singing really loud in my off-key way, so that passersby would stare into the shop and Aaron would turn red and hide behind a counter, laughing hysterically.
While at the muffin shop, I ended up having to close the shop alone on many nights, so I would flirt while the shop was open and invite guys to come by when I closed. So many nights I’d have a different man come by and I’d turn of f the lights in the front of the shop after locking us both in and then took whichever man it was at the time and suck his cock on this table, or wherever the mood presented. I remember a hot Latino man with a flat top haircut came by and fed me his beefy, uncut cock and fucked my face good, holding onto my head and groaning out loud, until he pulled out and used his thumb to hold open my jaw as he spurted his hot seed into my open mouth and watched me then gulp it down. It was a great place to privately suck a lot of cocks and I thought I could go on there forever. Good thing the manager or owner never came by at that time or I’d have been in deep shit!

I also met an older man whose name I believe was Tim, in his early 60’s. He was short and was bald on the top of his head. He wore t-shirts, jeans and cowboy boots and had a goatee. He looked very hot and he had been parked outside the muffin shop smoking a cigarette after I had closed one night. So, I flirted as I cleaned up and he finally saw me and flirted back. I ended up inviting him in, but he offered for me to join him at his place, so I closed up and we went there.

His apartment looked like it should have been part of the set for Sunset Boulevard, sort of dark and mysterious, with a large collection of antique furniture everywhere. The once piece I remember was a smoking table that was silver and had built-in compartments for the cigarette box, one for matches with a striking stone in it, one with a glass or crystal lighter that was very heavy and one for the ashtray. He was always using the word ‘elegant’ about things. He loved taking me to bed and having me nurse on his granddaddy dick for a long time before rolling me onto my stomach and climbing up onto me so his body weighed me down and he stuck his hard prick up my ass and started biting my neck and shoulders. He made these really hot groaning sounds in my ear that gave me chills as he pumped over and over into my hot asshole. It was funny, because I’d think of the way he’d fuck me and then laugh thinking to myself ‘It’s elegannnnt’ with his voice in my head saying it. We were seeing each other for about a month and he was fucking me like crazy to where I’d wear him out and he’d sleep a lot afterwards while I’d amuse myself looking at all of his collected wares while listening to classic Hollywood music and then he felt it was getting to serious and even though I didn’t understand it at the time, he said our age difference was a problem. I remember how upset I was at the time, but now I can understand how a vast age difference is mostly good for hot sex, but for something serious it’s better to be with someone who I can relate to around my own age. This took me several years to learn and many sexual encounters and brief love affairs with countless older men.

Eventually, I left the department store in San Mateo all together and got a job at a men’s clothing store on Castro Street, coordinating shifts between there and the muffin shop. The clothing store was fun and looking back I can see how I was one of the ‘twinks’ the owner liked to hire to work there. The owner was a great man and at the time had a wonderful partner. I decided not to take a chance there and didn’t have sex at this shop. However, the dressing rooms were great because they were diagonally across from the register and if you stood at the register you could see that there were mirrors slanting from above each dressing room so you could see what was going on inside them. It was hot to watch guy after guy try on clothes and strip down to his underwear, if any, some who did this on purpose so you could check them out. I did get some dates by working there and when I turned 21, I would go next door for a drink on my lunch hour to a bar that was army-themed, though I don’t remember the name, and I’d meet guys then. I’d also go out after work a lot since I worked right there, to places that are no longer around in the Castro, like The Bear and the Elephant Walk. There was also a nightclub back then called the Phoenix, which closed and was taken over by the pharmacy next door to expand.

I remember dating a guy named Eddie who I met one night after work when I went for a drink at the Phoenix. He was in his early 30’s and he always wore a ball cap and had this strange curl of hair that hung out the back of the cap. He was kinda butch/kinda nelly but he had a really big, uncut dick, although he preferred for me to fuck him. He lived in a bad part of down in the Bay View/Hunter’s Point Area and I hated driving him home because I always thought I’d get shot at. One night before I took him home he had me park somewhere and he had me sit back and pull out my cock so he could work his ass up and down on it. Up to this point, I hadn’t fucked more than a couple of guys and wasn’t really into it (whereas now I loooove to fuck). Still , I got into it with him. But then one night he’d moved on and said I was too young for him. *sigh*

There was also a thug boy named Levi who I met and fell madly in young love/lust with. He was bi-sexual and always checked out girls, despite our little thing we had going. He would describe himself as being a ‘Heinz 57’, a mixture of several nationalities including Black, White, Latin and Filipino. He was very hot to say the least, skinny, dressed like a thug boy, 19 years old. Listened to rap, smoked pot. He had a very large and long cock and I was always after it. Until that point, it had been older men for me, but Levi had this attitude and sexiness about him that only a thug boy could produce. And na’ me used to let him drive my car (with me in it) because he liked to drive and be ‘cool’ and I was so ga-ga I’d let him do what he wanted. He also lived with an older man named John who was a little ‘off’ and when we’d go there John was nice to me, but he’d lecture Levi about things and Levi would in turn throw a tantrum and break things. What was I thinking at the time’ I’d just let that all pass and think about his big dick stretching open my ass. And while Levi liked to take a little advantage, he always came through when it came to sharing his glorious boymeat. The first time he fucked me was in his bedroom and we were trying to be quiet so John didn’t hear and it hurt pretty bad and he stopped and said ‘Oh shit, I’m sorry, you’re bleeding’ and I thought for a second, shrugged and said ‘kkkkkeep goooooinnngggg’. After all, it was in and I might as well get some spunk in my ass. Yes, I took my chances. Anyway, things got to the point where I was spending every free moment with him and letting him drive my car and my relationship with my parents wasn’t so good, so I broke things off and bid him farewell. He didn’t take to kindly to that, but that’s life!



Chapter Eight

So in the summer of 1994, I decided to move to a small town called Alcolu, South Carolina, where a man lived who was in his early 40’s and he seemed like everything I could ever want. He said he had work lined up for me which was great. He was very romantic in his letters and phone conversations and my heart was a’flutter.

My parents were concerned about whether or not it was the right decision, but despite that, they threw me a going away party with all my family and friends there to celebrate my new life. In my mind, it was going to be like every country song I had listened to and everything was going to be biscuits and gravy.

Then I bid my parents farewell the next weeken and had my 1989 red Toyota Corolla packed up with everything I owned and some cashiers checks I had gotten from money I had saved and some from the family as a gift and I started my trip. Nothing much went on at first, it took forever to get out of California but I was happy once that part was over. I enjoyed Arizona and New Mexico and the panhandle of Texas. Most of my driving I did in the late afternoon and evenings and slept during the day at motels. This way the roads wouldn’t be so busy. My trip was along Highway 40 and it was a beautiful drive.

However, the most interesting things happened starting right in the beginning of Arkansas and continued throughout the Southern states. As the sun would go down and I’d be at a rest area, I’d discovered lurking in the bushes were men cruising. Well I was floored by this and had no idea this kind of thing went on. Then again, I hadn’t been to too many rest areas in my life before then. I couldn’t help myself and I walked on over to the bushes and through a path that guys had obviously made and then crossed paths with one guy whose face I don’t remember, but I remember he was wearing light blue jeans and had a nice swollen cock coming out the fly. So I dropped to my knees and took his cock into my mouth. This was great! No words were exchanged but he pumped my face for a while and then silently held onto my head and started breathing heavily as I tasted his warm cum filling my mouth.

Then as I was leaving this other guy in a pickup truck started following me and he got on the side of me once I was back on the Highway. So I looked in his window while trying to keep my eyes on the road and he pushed himself up in his seat and showed me his cock sticking out of his jeans. Then he got in front of me and so I followed him off the next exit. I followed him for a while until I couldn’t see much as it was dark. Then he stopped behind this Tex-Arkana fireworks stand and got out as I pulled up and stopped my car and got out. He lowered the tailgate of his truck and sat on it. He was really hot with reddish hair and a goatee and a flannel shirt which he opened to expose his hairy chest and stomach. I got down onto the dirt and took his cock into my mouth and started sucking it with a lot of passion and he was moaning and groaning. I unzipped my fly and started to jack my cock off as this was so damn hot. I was barely able to see what I was doing but I kept looking up and watched his face as I sucked him off. I then reached up with both hands and started tweaking his nipples as my mouth continued to work his pole. That sent him over the edge and he drained his balls into my mouth. This caused me to climax and I erupted and came all over the ground. We were both out of breath and I stood up and felt dizzy, but relieved. Then when we regained our composure, he zipped up, thanked me and told me he had to get back home to his wife. I remember I started to crack up from that and he looked back and smiled as he got into his truck. He then drove off into the night and I got back in my car and backtracked my way to get back to the Highway, which I finally found.

There were more stops where the same type of thing happened. One guy with glasses followed me in to this area and so he got on his knees and opened the fly of my jeans as he looked up at me and then he pulled my cock out and started sucking it. Then this other guy with a mustache came up and had his cock out and so the guy with glasses was taking turns on sucking both our cocks. This excited the shit out of me and after a few turns of the guy sucking my dick I blew my load right down his thorat. But then before the other guy could suck the cum out of the guy with the mustache, I quick leaned down and put that guy’s cock into my mouth and in seconds he pumped his cum into my mouth while the other guy with glasses stood up and jacked his cock, then turned my head with his hand and I opened my mouth as he groaned and squirted his hot seed into my mouth. Then that was that experience.

Well finally I got to Alcolu, but I could barely see the numbers on the houses, which were widely spread apart and they had huge lawn areas that separated the houses from the road by a distance. Then I found a house that looked exactly like the one he sent a picture of, so I pulled into the long dirt driveway and got out, excited to finally see the man I’d written to for over a year. Well, to my shock, a middle-aged black male opened the door with a shotgun in his hand and his wife was behind him looking annoyed. ‘What you want boy’’ he said sternly and I was really freaked out, thinking he might shoot me! So I stuttered a little and said ‘Uh’I think I have the wrong house.’ And quickly turned and walked away. Oops! I got in my car and drove off as fast as I could and then finally I found the house not much farther down the road.

Well, I’m going to keep this part short because it’s not real sexual, but it turns out that this man had sent me a picture of himself that was quite old when he looked good, like a big bear with longer hair and a beard and looked like he could be a hot bear daddy. Nope, when I got there this man had gotten a lot bigger, had dyed black hair that was cut just like Connie Selleca in the TV show Hotel and wore foundation, ‘rouge’ and eyeliner and mascara that showed off his beautiful blue eyes. My heart sank when I saw him and was wondering what I had gotten myself into. He even asked me if he looked like Crystal Gayle. OMG ,whyyyyy’’’

So I tried to make a go of it with him. He did stop wearing the makeup but the haircut was a bit much. People would stare when we went out and the sweat rings on his belly button and armpits were kind of nasty on his t-shirt. I mean, I like sweat as much as the next guy but going out in normal places, we don’t need to show the rings. It was humid though so I’ll give the guy that. Turns out he never did have work lined up for me either.

I didn’t mind that he was bigger as I’d always been a big boy and so it really didn’t matter to me. I even had a little sex with him. He was nice and hairy which was good. His cock was short, stubby and real fat. I remember I couldn’t barely get my mouth around it. So he got a good load in my mouth and that was that, but he knew that by his not being honest about things from the beginning bothered me and that I was planning to leave, that I had made a mistake. After all, I WAS na’ and 21, which is not a good age to try and get serious, for any of you guys out there in this age range dreaming of finding love right now. Trust me, wait until you’re older! Have fun while you’re young!

So I did leave one week later to head back to California. I planned on going to stay with my friends in Tracy, CA, a straight couple with two k**s who I knew well and who said I could go there if things didn’t work out (I really didn’t want to move back home). I was a bit exhausted and barely slept on the way home because I was somewhat traumatized and then ended up falling asleep at the wheel and crashing my car between Holbrook and Winslow, Arizona. I ended up being picked up by a tow truck driver who told me right there my car was totaled. I had been dehydrated from being stranded for about an hour before he showed up and he gave me water and I was soooo happy. It as blazing hot there! He invited me to his house where his wife was making dinner and I could come eat while I figured out about getting a Greyhound to California. I found that the bus wouldn’t be leaving until 10 that night, so I was welcome to stay there until then. Well, I then was introduced to their 19 year old son Tyler, who was fucking adorable, sort of as thuggy as a white 19 year old boy from Arizona could be and he was really friendly. I mean REALLY friendly and aske if I wanted to go cruise around with him and he’d show me the area before dinner. So I said ‘sure!’ and so we drove around the small town of Holbrook and started talking. Then he said to me ‘I’ don’t wanna sound rude or nothing, but are you gay’’ I looked at him and nodded, hoping he wasn’t a gay-hater or something, but surprisingly he asked me then if I wanted to suck his dick. I was like ‘serious’ Really’’ and so he drove down this road and went behind this warehouse that I had a feeling he’d been to before and sat back in his car and let me suck his cock through the opening of his boxers. It was so hot and he had a great scent about him. He came pretty quickly into my mouth and it tasted great. Back at his parents’ house I tried not to look too guilty that I had just given head to their son, but everything was fine. They fed me a great dinner and then saw me off at the Greyhound station and I was off to Tracy, CA.