Letters from Sky Part 16 and Epilogue
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Letters From Sky - Part 13 free porn video
Letters from Sky
By Jan S
Part 13
©2008
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Monday, May 19th (noon)
aawwhh, Marsh,
I'd hoped you hadn't looked at that stupid letter, and I could tell you
to never read it in the subject to here.
I was just being real dumb.
I woke up Lisa and everything when I was writing you, and yes I was just
real, real upset. But we talked, and she got her mom too, and I called
Daddy, and that helped, because hearing him, hearing how much I'd scared
him, made me know he couldn't have done any of that.
But what it was was that yesterday I found out that Amanda's Mom is Dr
Ross. And I knew her Mom worked with peeps that want to be girls, or boys
too, and aren't. Or that are but don't look like it, really is what it
is. But I also learned that Ann and Becky are also her cousins, because
she knew they weren't coming to the pool. And then I asked Kaezee on the
phone if Dr Ross was her shrink, and she is.
And that just seemed weird to me that Daddy had sent me there before the
clothes stuff started, and last night Daddy said that, when I was in the
hospital, I had said that I didn't care about my body anyway because it
is just a prison. And I remember saying it, Marsha, but I was just being
like deep and philosophical and stuff when I did it, but it scared him to
hear. And I also said it wasn't where I belonged too, and it meant that I
had to do things I didn't want to.
And that and the things you've told me about about when I was little made
him want me to see Dr. Ross, because she is kind of almost famous, and
she doesn't only do gender stuff but has done other things too.
And so that made me feel a lot better. A lot.
And Ms Y. had never known I was her patient at all.
So Ms Y called her, and I had an extra long session today, and she said
she never tells anyone, ever, who her clients are; and Ann and Becky and
Amanda didn't know; and Kaezee met Ann at an Ani-con, and only knew that
Kaezee saw her if Kaezee had said it; and Amanda knew that one girl
because she knew her before she started seeing Dr. Ross, when they were
real little. She tries to help people find who they are, not find boys
she can make be what they aren't, is what she said.
So I guess it doesn't sound like a plot anymore, OK? But I'm still real
confused. Real, real. And Dr. Ross says things went way too fast, maybe;
and that I can stop being a girl right now if I want. And when I got back
here, I almost did. But the thing is, and it's real stupid, the more I
get worried about it and think of it, the more I want to look more and
more like a girl, and wish people knew that.
OK? OK, that's the whole story about my freak out thing last night.
Now I got to make it up to everyone. I don't know what I can do. Because
I woke up people, and Lisa is all worried, and Ms Y sat in my room all
night and canceled all her appointments for today because they are afraid
I'm going to hurt myself again. And I don't feel anything at all like I
did that time. In fact, it's like the very opposite. But I can't get
people to understand how that was still.
And I missed my stomach doctor appointment and have to see him and Dr.
Ross again tomorrow.
And I'm real sorry to scare you and all, and how do I make it up to Ms Y
for all that? And to you and Daddy too? I'm just sorry I freaked.
And anyway, Marsh, the other thing is, I'm worried about you and Michael
being at that house these days. I guess you were for holidays, but this
is longer, and might be different. And she is different too.
Take care, OK? And I'm not being an old mother hen, and I wasn't either
about the drinking stuff. I just don't want you to get in trouble and
stuff because it would hurt Daddy and things.
I love you! Really!
Loves and Hugs,
Sky
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Monday, May 19th (night)
Hi again, Marsh,
Yep, I am feeling lots better, thanx.
Yeah, I can believe she did that. I can. So now what are you going to do?
There are Starbucks and Barnes and Nobles out here, if you just want, you
know. Please. It would be nice. But I know it would be really final with
her to do that, like you said. Maybe Michael would want to too if he's
really doing that.
I had a really, really long talk with Ms Y. today, and she was like all
apologizing about all the stuff with me pretending last month and, Mars,
I really felt bad because I don't really think it was like all her now,
because I think I really did like it right from then, and all. And she
did say again how much I seemed to be a girl as soon as I got around them
and had a girl's job, or mostly a girl's one. And she said she couldn't
remember, but right from the first night they must have said "she" and
"her" about me, and I'd thought about that, and I never noticed, and I'd
wondered how they hadn't ever, and had even thought that was part of the
plot, but she thinks I just didn't pay attention to them, and she thinks
that it would be impossible to get Wendy or Lisa to pull that off for
very long, and she's right. When Wendy gets going I don't think she could
think to say her for him, if she thought it was a boy.
And I told her how I remembered the time we went to breakfast, which was
the first time I picked to wear girl stuff for no reason, and Wendy had
said, "Even though Sky's a boy, she could still wear a dress." And I
still remember that real well. And maybe it was because of "boy" and
"she" being right there, but I noticed it big, big time. And she said
that maybe I'd right away been happy to have the chance is all, but that
it's not her field, it is Dr. Ross's. But I know Dr. Ross would never say
things like that unless I said them, because that is what shrinks usually
do.
I need to write Daddy a letter, big time, still, so more tomorrow, don't
be scared about me, OK. I'm lots better, I think. Just embarrassed around
Lisa and Ms Y., but they act like it's nothing at all, which doesn't
really help.
Really, really think about coming out here, Marsh!!!!
Loves and Hugs,
Sky
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Monday, May 19th (night)
Hi, Daddy!
Thank you for the GIANT virtual hug!! I did really need that!
I'd never thought of doing that in an email, Daddy. And you say I'm the
real silly one, huh? :-)
No, I don't think it had anything to do with the things with that Zack
boy, just with learning things all at once, maybe. Ms Y says that it
might be because things got out of my way all the sudden, and I could be
different. And that I was just lucky to meet so many people that knew
things like this happen. I don't know.
I'm happy, really, that you aren't canceling your things. I would just
feel worse if you did that, Daddy. Please, please don't. I'm not going to
run away again, or even back to the apartment, and I'm not going to hurt
myself any more; this is different. This is a lot different than then.
OK? I promise!!
OK -- But, Daddy, have you heard from Marsha and Michael lately? She
called to Marsha's internship place and told them Marsha didn't want it,
and Marsha has to get job at a store or something. I know Marsh wanted to
work at the museum a lot, Daddy. And she was going to have a part time
job too anyway.
And Michael went to a friend's house when he left the dorm, and Marsha
thinks he might be bumming invites, so he doesn't have to go there at all
before he goes to his camp job, and that's not for a month. I told Marsha
she could come here, I thought. She can can't she? And Michael too?
Please.
Well, it is a real bad report today on the computer classes too. But it's
because I was at the Dr Ross's all morning, and then I talked to Ms Y.
for a long time, and I feel real stupid about putting her and Lisa
through all that, you know. And she made me lie down for a while to rest.
When the other girls got back, she woke me and then made me go to Lisa's
soccer practice so I'd run around so I'd sleep tonight. It's grown-up's
logic, Daddy; you must understand it.
Lisa is on a real good team though, and so is Amanda. It's not super
select or anything, but their coach is real good I think, and she said I
could try out for her co-ed travel team for next year. Lisa and Amanda
are going to. At the Hall that would mean I wouldn't have to do school
PE, but it's three times a week, and games at least every other week in
fall and spring, and some are a long way away. Do you think that would be
OK though?
The coach didn't have an accent really, but she did call soccer
"football", so she must be real serious about it, right? I've always
thought that was a better name for it anyway, and that it was dumb to
call that other game I used to have to play "football". She also calls
the field a "pitch" though, and that is equally as dumb IMHO. I mean that
is only because they used to play it the same places they played cricket,
and it has nothing to do with football.
But listen, Daddy, the British also call parking lots "car parks", and
that is worse, because cars can't enjoy them, and would just mess up all
the grass and hurt the trees, right? :-)
When I told Ms Y that, she said we were driving on a parkway and when we
got home were going to park on a driveway (but she didn't, she went into
the garage.) :-P
OK, I know your thinking, "Sky, (or is it Jude?) is rambling, she must be
real tired." So I'll say good night (and, also, Lisa is trying to peek
over my shoulder.)
So:
(---HUG---)
right back at you!!! Only tighter. :-))
I love you.
2 More Days!!
Loves and Hugs, Lots
Sky
P.S.: I really, really do feel a lot better about things tonight. I
guess, even if it was all a plot, it was a real, real nice one for me.
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Tuesday, May 20th (late morning)
Hey, Mike
Hey, Marsha told me like you never showed up there, and are staying with
friends and stuff. She thinks you might be like your trying to stay away.
If you want, you could like come visit here and stuff. There's an extra
room and all. If you want, you know?
Look, Mike, just write Daddy is all, OK? Sometimes he won't start about
something, because he's like: "It's for you to bring up," you know? At
least he is with me lots. So just talk to him, OK?
I'd like it a lot too, really. It would be great to see you and all too.
I'm a lot different now though. I lost a ton of weight (OK - never really
weighed a ton :-P but, you know), and I wear my hair different and other
stuff. You might really freak, but I hope not. Anyway, I'd like you to
see anyway.
But Mike, what I've got to do is figure out if I do it just because I
want to be different from what I was, or if what I was always was
different from me really. And OK, that makes a lots more since in my
head, and it's kind of what some people have been telling me but, Mike,
do you want to figure that out too? But I don't know, some how that makes
sense, but maybe I'm crazy and don't know it.
Please. Just come.
Loves,
Sky
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Tuesday, May 20th (early afternoon)
Hi, Marsh
Are you doing OK? I think I am, but I'm not sure. I'm not all freaked now
anyway.
First the good news: My stomach is all better. I still can't eat tons and
tons of tomatoes and orange juice and things like that, but I can have
some. But I've started to like white pizza!
And my doctor said he thinks that Memorial Day is the end of May, and he
hasn't looked at a calendar, but that I can swim and stuff then!! One
week!
And when I saw Dr. Ross we mainly talked about the difference between
wanting to be something different and wanting to be what we are but can't
be; you know what I mean? And that was as bad as what I said to Mike a
little while ago almost.
But I just mean I'm not all freaked out anymore, just still kind of real,
real down. But not like I was last winter. I keep having to say that
because of things I did then, and now I'm just confused, not like then.
And I think even if it was a plot, it was a nice one because I like where
I got to most of the time, but now Dr. Ross is like trying to talk me out
of it, so that pretty much means it wasn't one anyway, right?
So anyway, any thing else happen there? I guess our old ground rule about
not mentioning her is gone, huh? Is that OK?
Mike said something: We all had to be a certain way. We could make
mistakes and screw up, but they had to be the right ways, the ones she
could talk to people about, and they would say, "Yes, they do that." But
if it didn't fit the role we weren't being like "Her child" would be. He
says she was like that with him too, and he says she was with you too
too.
Daddy told me once that some people raise children; he didn't say he
meant her; but that ranchers raise cattle, not calves; and dog guys raise
dogs, not puppies, and people should raise grown-ups. Maybe it is just
dumb kid stuff, but I think they link up. I think she was raising us to
just be her kids, her things, not real people, always. And maybe you and
Mike growing up had something to do with her getting even worse about me,
but also I was always the furthest from what "Her kid" 'specially "Her
son" would be because of the things you told me about, I think.
Alright, I know what people all think when little kids, like me, try to
get deep and figure out the world and things, and maybe it's all just
kiddy stuff and doesn't make real sense. But it's what I think anyway.
But, so, anyway, I'm not trying to stop you from loving Mama, Marsh. I'm
just trying to understand things myself. I do hope you come out here, but
if you don't want to maybe it would be good for her. 'Cuz I don't want
her to hurt.
But I don't want you too more.
Loves and Hugs,
Sky
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Tuesday, May 20th (night)
OK, Marsh,
I got something new to talk about!
Want to hear about it? It's weird.
I guess I do so many weird things that, if I didn't do something weird,
that would be weird, but this wasn't about the weird things that I do a
lot, but is weird in a whole new weird way of being weird, like it's not
as weird as that weird stuff, but it is even weirder in the weird way
that it is weird. OK?
And yeah, I decided to see how many times I could use "weird" in a
sentence on that. :-P But I didn't start 'til I was half through; I bet
I coulda done more if I'd thought of it at the beginning.
But so anyway, what I did was give Zack a flower.
I don't know why, Marsh!!! It was really dumb; I mean after all that
stuff. And I don't know what he's told his father, but he called Daddy
last week, and he wants to see us tomorrow. Just the first night Daddy is
back and everything, and I already think Daddy thinks I did something.
And it's not like I can prove anything. And I don't want to do that on
his first night back, you know.
But then he was sitting by the walk right after getting bawled out by the
woman that runs the rec center, and just looking at one leaf of his
flower, and I did. Well I gave it to Wendy to give him.
See, Lisa and I went back to the pottery room after origami and were
helping to put the things on the rack for the kiln. That was because some
pieces of mine fell off when it was fired, but the lady said I could
still glaze them and keep them, and I hope I can get them back on, and it
will still be pretty. And they are small and delicate so I was helping.
And there was a fight out by the soda machines, and someone was calling
someone names, and we went out to look, and it was Zack, and they were
just all just yelling at each other about not having enough for drinks,
and I think trying to get Zack to buy some, but he was saying he didn't
have money, and he had paid lots of times, and they should this time.
And so see, in origami we had made lotus flowers. I don't know if it is
officially origami, because we used lots of different pieces of paper and
then glued them together, and origami is supposed to be just one piece, I
think. But they were still real nice because it was our last project.
And so Zack, even while he was fighting, or yelling at least, was holding
his in his hand with his palm up, being real careful, you know. And
during the class, he had worked real hard on it, which was strange,
because usually he just did what we were doing real fast, you know,
followed the instructions but didn't, like, try to learn them or do it
good, or he would try to make everything into something else. But today
he didn't do that, and his had about twelve or more pedals on it, and
mine only had eight, and his were real good ones.
So one of the other boys knocked the lotus out of his hand, and then
another boy stepped on it on purpose and scraped it along the floor so it
all came apart. Then Zack pushed that guy into the soda machine, and
yelled about supposed to having to take that home to prove he hadn't
skipped and the boy knowing it, and Zack's partner from fishing was
there, and he stood between them, and then the pottery teacher told them
to leave, but the lady that runs the whole rec center came and told them
not to come back until they had a parent talk to her, and to go out
different directions.
OK, after we had got the kiln loaded Lisa and I went and talked to the
head lady because, even if we don't like Zack, it seemed like she should
know the other boys started it with the flower stuff, and also that Jeff,
that's the boy in fishing, was just trying to stop it.
And when we went outside, Ms Y. was waiting in the car, and Wendy was
over on the swings, and Zack was sitting on the curb looking at the one
pedal that was still hooked to his green stand thing he'd made. And, I
don't know, but I told Wendy to take my flower over to him but not tell
him whose it was or anything. And she said he asked if she was Lisa's
sister, but she didn't answer.
So, I don't know why I did it. Just real dumb or something, and tomorrow
we meet with him and his 'rent.
But, at least, Daddy will be home tomorrow!! He gets in about twelve if
his planes on time, but he still has to go to his office and to the
hospital some too, so I won't see him 'til dinner time. I ordered stuff
to do stuffed chicken breast for his dinner, because did you know you can
order that stuff online? We do it mostly, especially for dinner. And
they'll bring it tomorrow, and I hope Andrea doesn't get mad that I want
to cook, but I told you she's being nice now, right? And why?
Gees, Marsh, I g2g. I still have to write Daddy's letter, and Lisa and
them have already finished the show they were doing. Bye.
Loves and Hugs,
Sky
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Tuesday, May 20th (night)
Hi, Daddy
Last report! Yea!!!!
OK, I got a whole unit of the English done, and a half of one of the Math
and some of the Science too!!! Yea me!?
OK, I know that's not really much, but it's been hard, and I've been busy
with things.
But you'll be here tomorrow and can yell at me in person. OK?
And the Doctor said that my stomach is doing great, and I can stop
worrying about foods so much, AND that May ends on Memorial Day, and I
can swim that day!! But I know you will talk to them about it and get
details. But don't talk him out of it, PLEASE!!
And, OK, I'm all over that whole thing from that night, OK?
Could you try to get home early tomorrow? That way you will have more
time to tell me I should have done more computer stuff, right?
I love you, and I can't wait. Bye.
LoveHugLoveHug LoveHugLoveHug LoveHugLoveHug LoveHug,
Sky
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