No More Doctor Nice Guy Part 11 free porn video

No more Dr Nice Guy Part 11 As the world returns to focus my hands shoot up to my face and palpate it as I simultaneously look down at my body. I realize quickly enough that you can't actually tell what you look like by feeling your own face! Maybe if you're blind and have heightened other senses like touch I guess you can; but clearly that was not an ability I had. I just did not think I'd poked my hands all over my face enough to be able to ascertain with any certainty it is as the same as always. Although I felt much more familiar with my face than I think I would have Alex Turner's, and not just because it was history. I'd probably spent more hours in the last 9 months in the mirror doing my make up than Alex Turner had spent gazing at himself in the entirety of his life before that; but it still didn't translate into an accurate tactile map. I hoped that maybe the key was it didn't feel different. It felt like it could be unchanged. Still, at least there was one thing I could establish. My body looked the same as I looked down on it and my face remained soft. He hadn't turned me into a man. His implication hadn't been that he would but he had turned Kevin back into a woman, so I had entertained the notion momentarily as I floated between space and time or wherever the hell he sent me; that he was going to turn me back into the person I was before the curse. I felt ambivalent about this piece of established knowledge because even though I remained female, his last words rang through me and I dreaded to think who I now was. "Relax Alexandra. You're still you." I hear his voice and turn towards it. I guess he didn't need superpowers to tell what I was thinking. My actions made that obvious. But his affirmation brings me unquantifiable relief regardless. "It just wasn't feasible that a young single nurse would live in a home that size," he explains. Wasn't feasible? He was the one with the reality bending abilities. I imagine he could make anything feasible. But that wasn't my major concern. I grabbed at the life ring I felt he'd thrown. "I'm still a nurse?" "Of course. I said you're still you." "But-" And I was loathe to remind him in case I gave him ideas. But I had to know. "You said something about an unemployed single mother." "Well you're not yet clearly. But when the baby comes you will be." His implication was that having the baby would lose me my job. How would that work? "I could just take maternity leave." "Alexandra. You're all alone. You have no family. Putting your child in care for a day will cost you more than you earn as a nurse. It's just not practicable. No. I'm afraid unless you make some drastic changes your days of nursing are now strictly limited. Your baby will become your full time job! "Drastic changes?" What now I wonder? "Well you could get rid of it." "NO!" I don't even think before it erupts from me. But I do after. Is that what Mr Black wants? Was this something that wasn't supposed to happen. Like Kevin and I had mistakenly surmised. We couldn't get pregnant. We weren't supposed to. And now Mr Black is forced into a tidy up situation. But then if that's what he wanted couldn't he just click his fingers and turn my uterus into a prostate, and the baby would simply be gone. Unless that was the problem. He no longer could. Perhaps the baby was like an amulet protecting me from his transformative powers. I would pin that for future reference and explore it more later. "Well then. Your only other option is to start swiping right on men that look like Kevin. And copulate with as many of them as possible. And if you find a suitable one pass your child off as his. The sooner the better. You'll only be able to label the date inconsistency as prematurity up to a certain point. So I suggest you get cracking Miss Ward. Today even. To use your own parlance perhaps. You really better get fucking." For a fleeting second I wondered if this was a test. But as I looked at him I felt more unease at the comprehension that it wasn't. "I'm not going to trick some man into thinking he's the father of my baby. That's immoral. And evil." He grinned smarmily at my last word. Which acted as a prompt to me. I recalled two things. His assurance he was not about benevolence. And my hypothesis that he was the devil. Listening to his suggestions and watching his reactions still made me wonder if that was on the cards. Although he hadn't made a deal for my soul as yet. Maybe that was still to come. I shuddered. All this musing on theories that may or may not have been far fetched did give me a shock of angst as my thoughts returned to Kevin, making Mr Black's suggestions all the more distasteful. "Well I don't care what you do Miss Ward. But my suggestion might be the only chance you have of avoiding ending up alone. No one will want you when you begin to show; and certainly not when there's a child in tow." "I don't want anyone else." I say what I feel. "I only want Kevin." "You know how this works by now Alexandra." He sighs at me. "Kevin Moore doesn't exist. He never did. No one will have any recollection of him." "No one?" I ask tentatively. "No one except you of course my dear." "I want to see him." "I just explained to you Miss Ward. Please don't try my patience. You know you won't like it if you do. He doesn't exist." "Her then. You know what I mean. I need to be sure she's alright. And that you haven't done something to her." "Like what do you suppose?" "Put her in a life she doesn't want. Or that's horrible." "I assure you Alexandra. She's back in her old life. Which is what she wanted. Of course 18 months have passed and she is a very changed person. For the better of course. And no tricks. She's free to find a man, fall in love if she wants. Make friends. All things she was incapable of before I intervened. You should be happy for her." I wanted to be of course. But I could only think of myself right now. "Well I still want to see her. I want her to tell me that. And she deserves to know about the baby." "Why?" he asks suspiciously. "It's her baby!" "It's not her baby. It's Kevin Moore's. I'm sure she'll be as disinterested in it as she would be in seeing you." That stung. Now that she was a woman would any feelings she had for me just evaporate. Sure, she wouldn't want me in the way the curse made her but she'd still want my friendship wouldn't she? And wouldn't she want to be aware of, even if not involved with, the baby? But maybe Mr Black has interfered more than he's letting on. "Does she remember me?" Kevin Moore was erased from my life. Maybe I've been erased from her memory. That would explain why she didn't want to see me I guess. "Yes." Mr Black destroys that theory. "As much as I'm sure she'd rather forget. Her time as Kevin Moore will remain a reminder of always trying to be better." "Well let me see her and say goodbye then. Because if you won't take me to her I'll just find her myself." "Will you now Alexandra?" His tone is condescending. "Well answer me one simple question. What's her name?" Mr Black had me. I had asked Kevin early on what his name used to be. He wouldn't tell me. Save to say it wasn't Kevin. Which was his wry observation given I sorta got to keep my name. It wasn't so much that he didn't want me knowing. Well maybe a bit. But I think it was more he didn't want a reminder of who he was, and my knowing his former name made that more likely. I hadn't thought it important after a while. If that's how he felt I chose to respect it. I didn't imagine it would ever be relevant. I regretted that considerably now. "I don't know," I concede. "That'll make her hard to find then won't it," he mocks. "I know she's a lawyer at Fraser and Morgan." "It's a big company. And that was 18 months ago. I'm pleased to report she works for another law firm now. A much more ethical one." His answers were making it clear what he wanted me to know. What the writing said on the wall. "I'll never find her will I? You'll never let me." "Precisely. Now you get it. And she doesn't want to see you. She doesn't want to be found." It is in the silence of his adamant assessment that the elephant in the room finally sits on me. "Oh God! You ended his curse today because you knew about the baby. You thought if he knew too, he might choose to stay." "He might feel obligated to stay. There's a difference." "That's not fair. If he knew all the facts it might have been the life he chose. To be a family." "Listen to yourself. There's a term your sort use for a person like you. You're a conniving little cunt who deliberately got herself up the duff to try and trap a man in your miserable life." "That's not true! And our life was far from miserable. You cursed us and just abandoned us to it. We made the best of what we had." "Maybe your life wasn't miserable. You weren't trapped in a mundane job and enslaved by a sex addiction!" How can he throw that back in my face when he was responsible for it? I knew better than to take him to task on it though. He seemed to think he was above reproach. I guess with his powers, he probably was. "But he never seemed unhappy. He never said he was. I thought I made him happy." Which was true. "And yet he leapt at the first chance to get away from you! So don't espouse your hypocritical morality at me. You won't trick another man into being with you but you were quite happy to use your foetus to ensnare this one." "You know full well that's a lie. I would never do anything to make him unhappy. Your curse saw to that. You made me love him and spend my life doing everything I could to appease him. And now he's gone. So what happens to these feelings you gave me?" I knew I should shut up. Why was it that I couldn't? I was on a roll now. "These feelings of love for a man that never existed! Thanks to you! Do you take them away now or do you leave me stuck with them to torment me further?" Why don't I just give him more ideas to hurt me while I'm at it? Mr Black looks stunned. Then laughs a heartier laugh than I've ever seen him do before. "Oh Alexandra! You know I had promised to never see you again. And that was my plan. I was going to end Kevin's punishment sooner or later, but at a time when you weren't around. You just forced my hand with your little bun in the oven, so I had to sort things out with you in the next room. And you proved once again your habit of walking in at inopportune moments. Now I'm glad we did meet again though. You never fail to amuse me greatly. You think you're so smart. But you consistently impress me with your outstanding stupidity. You think I forced you to fall in love with him? I'm afraid my dear you did that all by yourself." "What are you talking about?" I have a creeping realisation. But I refuse to believe it. "I didn't control or manipulate your emotions in any way. So if you fell in love with Kevin, that was completely your doing. "But that's impossible!" He's lying surely. "It feels to me that you've made yourself a victim of your own powers of persuasion. Alexandra. You were so certain something was going to happen that you made it happen." "You're lying." I have to challenge him. Because any other option is unfathomable. "I assure you I'm not. Which I'm sure you'll come to realise in the hours of self analysis you're about to start. Personally I was very heartened by the relationship you two formed. Maybe Kevin wasn't as invested as you given how quickly he bailed on it. But he certainly felt something. Which is why he felt so ready to go back to being a woman. And really fall in love with someone. I guess you showed him how that was possible. So be heartened by that. And, as for yourself, remember a broken heart won't last forever. If it's any consolation I'm sure when the baby comes you'll be too busy to grieve." "I did all this to myself?" I'm incredulous. But it's become more a possibility the longer I reflect on it." "If you mean: Fell in love, became an extremely accomplished female sexual partner and got yourself pregnant. Then yes. That's exactly what you did to yourself. But I'm afraid it's time I left you with that. I have to go and check how your former husband is settling back into her old life." The knowledge that he's about to abandon me fills me with an anxious fear. I don't know what else had to change along with Kevin's disappearance. I look around the strange room I'm in. "Where am I?" "Not far from where you used to live with Kevin. It's an apartment. Two bedroom though. I made allowances you know. For the nursery. I'd hate you to think me heartless." Ironic he should say that. It's exactly what I think him. "Will I see you again?" I'm not sure why I asked it. I should hope not. Both times he appeared to me he's made my life infinitely worse. But he was my only link to Kevin. So there was some uncertainty in my question as to what answer I wanted. "I don't see why. Thank you though. For your help with Kevin. He gets a second chance because of you." "Do I get a second chance?" I don't know why I asked that either. What I would want. I'd never imagined our curses would end. But it seemed like a reasonable query. "Of course you do Alexandra. It's growing inside you." Then he vanished. I guess that was a dramatic enough parting statement for a grand exit. Okay; I begin, with the internal tone of self justification; so if he was speaking the truth then maybe he hadn't forced me to fall in love with Kevin. But he had set it up so that it was hard for me not to. He made me female. And I completely fell for that female trap of mistaking sex for intimacy. Giving it more meaning than the base animal act it was. Coupled with the instinctive desire to try and help him once I discovered his deep seated wounds I set myself up for a strong emotional attachment. And I let it happen. Once again I'd been the major driving force in my own destruction. If I hadn't have loved him then maybe I wouldn't have used a contraception plan that made the Billings method look like high science. I hadn't intentionally got pregnant. But I hadn't been super diligent in ensuring I avoided it either. I liked the feel of him I suppose, without the cling wrap. As I thought more about it, I guess I couldn't really fault Mr Black's argument for whisking Kevin away from me when he did. I would have ended up hating myself if Kevin had sacrificed his chance to be free of the curse for me. Or more accurately the baby. It was time to accept my current lot and take inventory of what remained. All traces of Kevin were gone. It was clearly the apartment of a single girl. Me. My clothes were much the same. Although certain Kevin related items had disappeared with him. All photos, our marriage certificate. My bridal lingerie was gone. As was my boxed wedding dress. I had tried it on one day a few months back, and taken a few selfies. When I showed Kevin he made me wear it and re-enact the wedding night we never actually had. It was fun. Although the foreplay took longer than we anticipated. It was harder to get out of that dress in a hurry than I imagined. I suppose the selfies were gone off my phone too. Ironically the naughty nurse outfit he'd made me buy from an adult shop on one other occasion remained. I told him I hated pandering to such a stereotype; no self respecting nurse would be caught dead wearing something as regressive as that. But my outrage was just for show. I'd worn it for him all the same. I also told him, whilst we were playing Doctors and nurses, that 'it' most certainly wasn't a thermometer. And what he was doing with it was not at all how you take a temperature! Memories of our love making made me feel so sad. It was then I felt pangs of pain deep in my heart. A sudden glaring beacon; that great revelation of my future loneliness; washed over me completely and I slumped to the ground in front of my bedroom closet. Before crying myself unconscious. ******* It was late Sunday afternoon before I dragged myself from my mire of self pity and tried to pick up some pieces. I didn't have to work again until Monday night. Thankfully only a run of 3 as Kristi needed me for the 48 hour lead up to her wedding. A reminder that life went on, I suppose, and I guess something to focus on. Aside from me, I wondered if anyone else's lives would be the lessor for having Kevin removed from it. Marty has plenty of buddies. Kevin was just another mate. He wasn't a groomsman. They got along well but Kristi and I were the reason they knew each other at all. So there won't really be a gaping hole left in their lives. I thought of the men and women at the factory. Kevin had patiently helped them all with mastery of their second language, and helped them navigate the bureaucracy of a foreign land. Would the foreperson that replaced him be as kind to them? I worried he or she wouldn't. I suppose to an extent the status quo was returned. Kevin Moore hadn't existed 18 months ago. And now he didn't again. I remained an anomaly. And I suppose my baby did too. More particularly than me even. Half its DNA was from a non existent person. What would that mean? There was way too much to process, so I just had to shut everything down. Not think about Kevin, or the baby's incongruous origins. But I was so frightened to think I was now alone. How could I possibly manage raising a child? I imagine every expectant mother thinks that at one time or other. I just hadn't anticipated going through it all by myself. My phone rang then. A timely reminder I suppose I wasn't completely alone. A small comfort, but treasured nonetheless. "Hey," I answered. Trying to use a voice that disguised the fact I'd spent the past several hours weeping pitifully. "How are you feeling?" "Seedy!" Kristi croaked. "I'll bet. If it's any consolation I suspect Hannah's worse though. Have you spoken to her?" "God. Imagine that conversation. It would become a 'who's more woeful' pissing contest!" "I suppose." My heart wasn't really in it. "Thanks for being the responsible adult Ally." "I guess it's just my nature." I'm blunt and dry. "Well you can run amock at my wedding. Marty's been talking you up with all the eligible bachelors." "That's not a good idea." I can't help sounding so flat. I best be careful or she'll call me on it. "Why the hell not? Just get a little tipsy. And hook up with one you like the look of. Choose someone you've never met if you want. Less chance of ever seeing them again." "Thank Marty for me K. It's great that he's thinking of me. But tell him I'm not interested." I try to sound more lively at least. "Not interested. You haven't even seen what's on offer." "I'm just not in that place right now." "God. In the near 12 months we've been friends it doesn't appear you've ever been 'in that place.' I've never seen you with anyone. Is there something you're not telling me?" "Well yes." "What. Let me guess! You're part of a cult and you're a virgin." "No. Not part of a cult." "Just the virgin part then." "Hardly." I laugh. "Well I've never seen any evidence to the contrary." I'll have to tell her some time. May as well be now. Problems shared and halved and all that guff. And I could use the news to explain my very altered affect. "I have all the evidence you need. It's growing in my womb right now." Does anyone even say 'womb' anymore? I probably sound stupid. "What the fuck!!" "Yep. I'm two weeks overdue. 6 weeks since my last period in fact." "Are you sure?" it's probably rhetorical. She's just incredulous. "Maybe your pituitary's just playing up." "You know my cycle as well as.... better than anyone. You could set your watch by it. And I did the pee on the stick thing." Twice. But maybe don't say that. "Oh God! Who's the father?" "No one you know." Apparently. "And he's not in the picture anymore." Irrefutably. "Oh!" She pauses. I suppose it was a bit of a Mic drop." This is not a phone conversation Alex. I'm coming over." "Are you okay to drive?" I don't decline her offer. I need my best friend right now. "I've got a functioning liver you know. Well relatively." "Fine. Do you know where you're going?" Because I wouldn't. But I guess she does. I've probably lived here as long as she's known me. "Hung over. Not head injured Al!" "Okay. See you soon." *** "What are you going to do?" She's sitting at the kitchen table of my apartment. I could have bet money on this question being a lead in. "I'm keeping it if that's what you mean." "Well yes. But I need to be sure you understand what this means. How much your life will change." "Ruin it you mean." "I'm not you Alex. But I guess I have that traditional idea of a partner and children. And kids when I feel financially secure. You seem to be rushing headlong. Maybe you don't care about those things but it will be hard to establish a long term relationship with someone when there's a child in tow. Not impossible of course. Just more challenging." Her argument was logical. And sensible to most. But I didn't want anyone but Kevin. Now that he was gone I was destined to be alone. But the baby growing inside of me was as much his as mine. And tangible proof he existed once. One day I might need that perhaps. "I know you think I'm crazy Kristi. And I know I'm charging into completely uncharted waters without a compass or a back up plan. But I want this baby. So I have to accept the repercussions of that. And I didn't tell you to have you try and talk me out of it. Or to steal your thunder in your wedding week. But I obviously won't be drinking at your wedding and you would have got so suss on me then anyway. So better you know now, and we not deal with it till you're back at work after your honeymoon. And we keep it a secret till the mandatory first trimester's over." "Okay. But how are you feeling?" "Fine now. I had a big spew this morning . Which is kinda how I found out." "Morning sickness hey? You really do things by the book don't you?" "It's almost like I was manufactured in a lab," I say snidely. Which she laughs at; so I do too. "Let's get back to wedding business K. I need the complete distraction from my life. Give me some spot fires to put out." "That, oh faithful bestie... I can surely do!" ****** On Wednesday night. The start of my last shift before the wedding, Shaan grabs me before she exits. "How's Kristi? Is she ready?" "I think so. She's been pretty meticulous. Just nervous about it all going well." "I'm sure it will. I'm really looking forward to it." "So you should. Kristi and I decided you should have the pick of the men. Well Hannah the maid of honor might be some competition, she's quite the predator, but you're a far better choice." I laugh. "What about you?" "Someone's got to look after things. You saw how slightly out of hand things got at the Hen's. And I'm certainly not in the market for a man right now." Shaan gave me a look then. I hope she doesn't think I was implying anything. I mean she is one of the most stunning human beings I had ever seen. I could tell that though even when I only had eyes for Kevin. So it wasn't like I was seeing her with new perspective. But I hadn't considered the repercussions I would face from going from near daily sex to suddenly none at all. It had only been 3 or so days and maybe I was already getting toey. Although I couldn't imagine, after 9 months of being a happily heterosexual woman, I would find myself channeling Alex Turner's tastes. So I felt Shaan was probably safe from my designs. But I dreaded even more feeling an attraction to men other than Kevin. I'm sure it was just coincidence that the male stripper's abs from the hen's party were sliding through my head intermittently. The root of the problem was no doubt that I was missing Kevin, and this was merely a knee jerk reaction. And I wondered what my hormones were doing as my body tried to establish the origins of a placenta. I just had to hope things would even out, and I wouldn't do anything stupid and reboundish. "So you say." Shaan chooses her response. "But things might change when the party's in full swing." "Perhaps," I humour her. I was fairly sure that was unlikely. "Did you hear the good news though." Shaan moves along. "That girl Javed saved the other week. She got discharged from 'Wellness House' today." "That's great." It was pleasing news. "I heard she got extubated and discharged from ICU last week but that was my last update. Nights tends to isolate you." "I hope she doesn't do it again though. Like they all do." The words of a weary cynical nurse ring through. I can empathise though. "I know it seems like a revolving door sometimes. With the frequent flyers and their representations. So I know what you mean. But what you don't realize Shaan: These borderline personality disorders and the recurrent overdosers. If you can get them through the rough years. They end up doing really well in the end." "I guess we don't see that when they're calling us all 'Fucking Cunts' at 3 in the morning Alex. But I guess it is food for thought. I forget you used to be a psych nurse. Do you miss it?" "It's not like my skills are going to waste in the Emergency Department Hun." Which was somewhat true. Alex Turner's comfy chair calm conversation style of psychiatry didn't really cut it in ED. But knowing how to de-escalate someone psychotic because they were cracked up or just plain bonkers was an invaluable skill. "True dat." She jokes. "Well I hope she does well given how hard we all worked to save her. You should have heard Stanley in the tea room right now. He was making out like he single handedly saved the day. "Why am I not surprised. Please tell me he's not still there. I forgot to put my food for tonight in the fridge." "Just ignore him." "I always try to. But it can be hard." Sure enough he was telling some intern about his heroics. Or maybe he had been. He'd moved on from there. "Anyway. You shoulda seen her tits wobble every time the Lucas thumped on her chest. I reckon they were fake. You know how when chicks lie on their back their tits slide out to the side. Well these just sat straight upright, all perky. I coulda found out for sure if she died. Give 'em a good squeeze. But it was a bit hard to do when she ended up in ICU." God. He's so repulsive. For all his faults I honestly believe Alex Turner was nowhere near as reprehensible as this guy. And I feel like I have become a fairly harsh critic of that former aspect of me. I slowly count to ten as I shove my food in the fridge. The nurse he's dating, a vacuous ninny for sure, but that's an aside, was actually there the night of the arrest. Surely she can't have been impressed by his belligerent behavior. Maybe she admires his arrogance. I don't know. I just can't imagine. As for the girl's boobs. I hadn't noticed. She was only 24 after all, so things should have still been fairly taught. Besides, the ambos had cut her bra off to attach the defib pads; and with her arms up forward, strapped to the side of the Lucas, I'm sure her breasts were held in place. What sort of a creep focuses on that anyway? "You're a fucking disgrace Stanley." So much for counting to ten. "What's the matter Ward? Jealous? Or maybe you fancied her tits yourself. You certainly don't seem to be into men." "I can't see any of them around here? Just a stupid boy with a tiny dick." "Like you'd know." "Well that's what Julie says in the change rooms." I shouldn't have done that. Brought her into it. I leave before things escalate, to the sound of his awkward laughter. *** It's so bloody early when we start our wedding day ritual. Clearly it's my first time as a bridesmaid and in spite of everything else being ready, getting us equally ready is a time consuming process. Hair and make-up are major undertakings, along with French polished nails. It's nice to have a whole team fussing over you. I suppose I was a little bit ripped off not actually having a wedding day with Kevin, even though it was all moot now. At least I'm getting an inkling of what it would have been like. Once all that is done, getting her in the dress turns out to be the most precise task of all. Her excitement is infectious and it's so easy to get swept up in it and forget about all my own issues. The day flew by though, once it began in earnest. I loved the church wedding, the photos in the botanic gardens and all the grand, if somewhat clich?d tradition of it all. At the reception, with my insistence I finally get Kristi to stop and draw breath. "Just stop and take it all in Hun," I tell her. "No more stressing. Just enjoy it." I guess she listened, as she seemed to smile a lot more after that. As time went on I could tell she was finally appreciating this truly was one of the best days of her life. As it totally should be. Hannah and Marty's best mate Isaac ('call me Zac') gave the speeches and did the toasts. Non alcoholic cider looked enough like champagne for me to get away with it, no-one suspected a thing. So I could toast away and wander around looking suitably ebullient. What I found remarkable though was that a mere 7 days after she'd been vomiting in a seedy toilet, Hannah was at it again. Knocking back the booze and getting more and more disinhibited. She certainly was lighting up the dance floor. I could see why she and Kristi were friends. She was definitely a live wire. "Watching the entertainment." A male voice said beside me as I stood near the edge, wondering if I should intervene to save her dignity. At some point Hannah was sure to go 'arse over tit' and make a spectacle of herself. I glance in his direction. "Isaac," I say dryly. "I'm just waiting for the train wreck." "Why do you insist on calling me that?" He says, but without annoyance. "It's your name. And such an old man name. It's funny." "Fine! Alexandra!" "I like my name. In any of it's forms. You can call me that. Or Alex. Or Ally. Or even Al." "That's also an old man name. Makes me think of a bloke with a beer gut." "Well definitely call me that then. That's the image of me I want you to have. Isaac and Al. Contemplating our paunches whilst we rub our hands through our thinning grey hair." "What are we going to do about Hannah?" He ignores my vivid visual description. "Not we. You! She's your partner in the bridal party. You sort her out." I wouldn't shirk my duty. I had rescued her once, and will do it again if needs be. As much for Kristi's sake as hers. I don't want anything happening that could detract from her wedding. But if I could off load her onto him it'd be a win. "I'm surprised you aren't all over that already anyway." Here's hoping on the power of suggestion. "Been there done that." He grins. "Eww!" I say. "Really?" Then, "Ewww!" again. "What's that reaction for?" He seems a little offended. "I dunno actually. Probably an over reaction." I back pedal. "There's nothing wrong with either of you. So go for it by all means." Which was my true sentiment. "Nope. No backsliding. Especially when I haven't worked my way through all members of the bridal party." Oh for fuck sake! I hope he's joking. "I don't think Marty will be too impressed with you if you try to sleep with Jason." Marty's younger brother. He was my direct opposite in the bridal party. "He's not first on the list," Marty retaliates. "I'll see how I fair with the others to start with." "Luckily for you I know you're a decent human being when you're not liquored up and being sleazy at your best friends wedding." I decide to be charitable. "So here's a tip. See the girl on the dance floor in the saffron dress." "Saffron?" "Really?" is he messing with me? "Yellow!" I explain anyway. "The dark one." He means her colouring rather than the shade of orangey yellow I guess. "Yeah I suppose. Her mother's Indian. Her father's African. She's Shaan. Personally I think she's way out of your league but I do know she's single. And looking. So feel free to have a crack." I wasn't setting a hound on Shaan. I would never do that. I did actually like Zac. He was a good guy. "Well she certainly is hot! But not what I had my sights set on tonight." "Give it a rest Isaac. It's not happening!" "Oh come on Alex. Your best friend just got married. Aren't you feeling all loved up and amorous? Sucked in by all the majesty and pageantry of it? And you're looking fucking gorgeous. All that effort with the make-up and your plastic looking hairdo. Are you really going to waste that by going home alone and wiping your face off in your flannelette pjs?" "Aren't you the pragmatist? So I suppose you're really doing me a favour by throwing me a bone. Because that's precisely why I'm looking so pretty. Just so you'll want me!" I'm not mad. I just want to torment him. He does make a valid point. I do look fantastic thanks to skilled artistry. I just wished Kevin was here to appreciate that. "You're so funny Alex. I could argue with you all day. I suspect this is already foreplay for us!" "Is that right? Well you'll just have to excuse me then. I have a sudden urge to vomit." Sadly, it was true. And not because of him. But he needn't know that. I bustle off to the 'ladies,' grabbing an ondansetron wafer out of my clutch, hoping it will kick in in time. The last thing I want is anyone to see or hear me vomiting in the loo. **** Thirty minutes later and the nausea has settled without me vomiting. I'm ambivalent about that. Surely if I had vomited I could have avoided my current predicament. A major case of vomit breath definitely would have prevented me from being where I am at this particular moment in time, doing what I'm doing. Which is standing out in the courtyard of the Reception centre. Hiding behind a large fern. With Isaac Smith's tongue halfway down my throat. TBC