Candys Fashion House Chapter Fifteen free porn video

Thanks to Charlie for the guidance help and wonderful editing skills. I dressed quickly and left for work, it was going to be a big day. We were getting close to completion and we had the big party to organise. Siobhan and I worked on the invite list and gift baskets for all who attended. I organised the band, security, lighting and caterers. I left Candy to organise the models. I worked with the construction team finishing the runway in the new area. I ended up driving the forklift for a while because they were a man down. That drew a few whistles and cat calls as I raced around on the forklift. The laughter and jeering stopped though when they saw that I could actually drive the thing. It was a long day and I hung around the office for as long as I could. My phone rang, it was Lauren wanting to know what time I was going to be home. I lied to her. "Sorry baby I'm going to be a bit late tonight, got lots on at the moment." "OK then." She sighed. "But don't be too long, I love you." I sat at my desk trying to hold back the tears, fuck, why can't I stop fucking crying all the time. By the time I dredged up enough courage to go home it was late, very late. Lauren and Alecia had ordered in pizza and had eaten by the time I got there. Thankfully they had ordered enough so there was some left. The girls watched quietly as I ate in silence, I could feel their stares boring into me, but it was silent, no conversation, and definitely no laughter. It felt cool and tense. It was like we were all afraid to say something in case it ignited another fight. Later after eating I murmured, "I'm going to take a hot bath." They both watched me climb the stairs. I sank into the hot sudsy water and reclined back letting my muscles relax and soften. I closed my eyes and drifted off into a mild meditation. I felt the world stop and my mind slowed down. I don't know how long I was out for but when I came to the water was getting cold and I could hear the girls tittering in the bedroom. Alecia watched me as I came out of the bathroom. "God how did you do that, I went in to see if you were all right and you were in some sort of trance or something." "It's called meditating, an art I learned a long time ago. I don't use it as much as I should these days, but it is very refreshing and great for relieving stress." The girls were getting into bed as I dried myself. I glanced at them. This is normally one of my favourite times. The girls take as much trouble dressing for bed as they do if they're going out. As it always is the bed was awash with lingerie and lace. They are two very sexy ladies. "I'm going downstairs to get a drink, do you want anything?" They both shook their heads. I got a beer out of the fridge and turned on the TV, I flicked through the channels settling on some motor racing channel. I watched it mindlessly for an age hoping that the girls would be asleep when I got to bed. I had another couple of beers and when I checked the time it was well after midnight. I snuck into the bedroom and they were both cuddled up tightly together. It's a sweet sexy thing watching them like this. I slipped beneath the covers and laid on my back staring blankly into the darkness. I couldn't put my finger on what made me feel this way. All I knew was I felt weak and feeble, like I used to feel when I had run away from the bullies at school. I felt ashamed. I woke early again and escaped before either of the girls got up. It was another busy day and I had a string of appointments and meetings. The day was gone in a flash. I couldn't blame the girls. It was my fault. I just needed to be firmer. I stayed at the office until much longer than I needed to. It was late again when I got home I was hoping maybe the girls had an early night but they were up waiting. "Kelli come into the lounge baby we want to talk," Lauren called. "Come on stop hiding from us." I complained, "Sorry but I need to take a shower I will be down in a moment." After I had come back down, I noticed the girls were still sitting in the lounge waiting and Lauren didn't look happy. I walked into the kitchen, hunted through the fridge, and I decided that it would have to be simple as there wasn't much in there. Lauren had a nervous look on her face. "Baby what's wrong? You are not yourself. It is because of the other night isn't it?" I couldn't really deny it. "Yes I am uncomfortable with what happened the other night. I feel like I should never have let that happen." Alecia came over and cuddled up to me from behind. "Babes why are you so upset, we had a fantastic experience and we all loved it." "I just don't feel comfortable with myself for letting it happen." I was swallowing back tears that were slowly breaking through the dam. Lauren held my head in her hands and lifted my head until I was looking her in the eye. "Kelli that is just so wrong. Stop being a drama queen. You gave us a gift the other night and it was wonderful. Now you have an understanding of the pleasure we get. We have shared things that a lot of couples don't. I think we are stronger for it." Alecia kept holding me gripping my arm tight. "Babes the question is did you enjoy it?" What could I say they knew the answer I couldn't deny I enjoyed it. "Yes Alecia I can't lie, you already know the answer." She giggled. "Yeah we sort of got that impression. So if you enjoyed it and we enjoyed it how could it be wrong? Honey I love it when you put that beautiful cock in me, so why shouldn't you enjoy the same thing. We have to stop thinking about specific gender roles and just enjoy being with each other." Lauren was giggling as well. "Baby why are you so upset about this?" "Because I am scare that you will lose even more respect for me, because you won't see me as a man anymore." Alecia kissed me with a big grin on her face. "Baby that ship sailed a long time ago. You are no longer a man. That doesn't mean we don't love you or respect you. You are still our rock and we depend on you but you are not a man in the normal sense of the word." They were making sense but I couldn't shake off the feeling that it was wrong. "But what will people say if they ever find out, god I would be a laughing stock." Alecia kept nuzzling on my neck. "Baby you can't spend your life hiding from who you are. OK you aren't a normal boring man, you are so much more. Kelli, it's who you are, enjoy it and accept it." As she kept nuzzling Lauren snuck in and started kissing both of us and we ended up in bed making wild passionate love. It was the start of a magical period in our relationship, we seemed to find another gear if that's possible, we made love like rabbits and I was starting to wonder if I would survive. They were wearing me out. The big difference was in my head, I really started to feel comfortable as Kelli. I looked forward to going out and getting dressed up. I spent hours in front of the mirror trying new makeup techniques. I took great delight in raiding the girl's wardrobes. It was definitely first up best dressed in our home. What's more I was taking great pleasure in teasing the construction guys. Life was pretty good. The longer I spent in my new persona the old Michael was becoming a fuzzy distant memory. The deeper I went into Kelli the stronger the attachment was. I started to consider what the future would have in store. The more I thought about it the more I realised I couldn't go back to being just Michael and I didn't want to which was the strong point. I only had to think about how Maddison treated me. As Kelli she couldn't get enough of me, as Michael she didn't even want to talk to me. As much as I had fought this weird journey, Kelli is who I am. I loved Kelli. I loved the clothes, the attention and I loved Candy's. It was my company. Kelli was so deeply imbedded in my everyday thinking and planning. One day while I was putting my makeup on I reflected on my appearance, there were a couple of things that stuck out for me. As I looked in the mirror the two things that I didn't like was my Adams apple and boobs, I hated the fact I had to wear breast forms to appear like a normal woman. I was always self-conscious about the fact someone would notice. I also hated the fact that when I dressed in lingerie I lost my bust. If I was being honest with myself and I was going to become Kelli for real then breast implants were a must. But if I did go down that route I also knew there would be no going back. No running away. For days I wandered around seemingly lost and in a daze as I reflected and contemplated what to do. In the end I made the decision, yes I wanted to be Kelli. That moment of acceptance seemed to release me and I felt free, like a weight had been lifted. I smiled broadly inside. yes it was true I wanted to be Kelli. My relationship with Lauren and now Alecia was stronger than ever. We seemed to be getting on so well and they both loved Kelli. In fact everybody loves Kelli. I think as much as Alecia says she loves me I think if I was to slip back to living as Michael she would leave. What would happen after that is anyone?s guess. I contacted a local surgeon who specialised in plastic surgery and made an appointment. I didn?t talk to the girls about it. I was going to make it a surprise and do a big reveal. That would get the girls going. The surgeon did a full examination including a full screen of blood tests. He was amazed when I told him I wasn?t on any hormone treatments. He asked lots of questions. He said it was truly remarkable that a man would have such smooth skin, I had breasts developing and he did some body fat calculations. The look he gave me was one of disbelief. He kept asking about the hormones. Still he booked me in for the procedures, I decided on a small implant. I didn?t want to be one of those false looking woman with breasts way to big and firm for their body. I went for a B cup size. The doctor congratulated me on common sense. He smiled. "It will save your back in later life." I headed home feeling pretty chuffed with myself. Work was keeping me pretty busy the expansion project was nearing completion. It was a couple of days later when the doctor called me and he sounded upset. "Kelli why did you feel you had to lie to me about taking hormones?" I was nonplussed. "I?m sorry doctor but I don?t know what you?re talking about." "I have received the blood test results and they show very high levels of estrogen, the levels are commensurate with a male who is taking female hormones." "But I haven?t taken any." He sounded unsure. "Well do you take any medication of any kind?" "No," I replied. "The only thing I take is a vitamin supplement every day." He asked, "What sort of vitamin?" I went and got the bottle out of the cupboard and read out the label to him. "No that wouldn?t do it those are just an over the counter vitamin supplement." He was silent for a moment and I sensed he was deep in thought. "Kelli can you take a tablet out of the bottle please and describe them to me, see if there are any markings on them." I emptied the contents and got one of the tablets, and described it and read out the tablet marking. "Kelli, those tablets are birth control pills, who gave them to you?" "What!" I yelled. I could hear the anger in his voice and I didn?t want to drop Lauren in it so I lied. "A friend at work suggested that I take them because of the diet I was on." He was noticeably agitated. "This is a serious matter. There are a lot of side effects and dangers you need to be aware of. Taking female birth control pills is like taking female hormones and it does some things to the male body." He went on to list some of the effects. "There will be a loss in bone density and muscle mass." "The testicles and penis will shrink." "There is also an increased risk of suffering an enlarged prostate gland and this may lead to prostate cancer." "There are also the psychological side effects to consider. You may suffer from severe mood swings and feelings of sadness." Fuck that explained why I was always fucking crying. Thank god at least I wasn?t going crazy! "I strongly recommend that you stop taking the tablets immediately. If you would like to talk about hormone replacement therapy there are far better options with much reduced risk." I didn?t know what to say. The hard edge in his voice was plain. "If you want to you could lay criminal charges against your so called friend. In fact I would go so far as to say you damn well should. This so called friend has misled you badly." I thanked him for his assistance, and promised to consider the legal issue. He also suggested that if I wanted to continue taking a proper hormone then I should freeze some of my sperm because after a while the female hormones will make me sterile. Fuck! As we talked he asked whether I still wanted to go through with the procedures. Although he had scared me and I was angry the answer was still yes. He went through further explanations about recovery and booked in the operation for two weeks time. I collapsed back in my chair, what the fuck. Lauren had been tricking me into taking these fucking tablets for over a year now and I was stupid enough to go along with it. When I thought about it I realised what a fucking moron I really am. It was fucking obvious as hell, why didn?t I see it everybody else did! As the day wore on I got angrier and angrier. Shit she had actually put my life in danger all because of her fucking fantasy. By the time I got home that night I was ready to explode, I felt like strangling her, what about Alecia did she know? They were in the dining room when I walked in. They were having a glass of wine and chatting about their day, and work. They both smiled when I walked in although I saw the look change on Lauren?s face as she saw the stern look on mine. "Baby you look terrible, what?s the matter?" I slammed the pill bottle down on the table. "What can you tell me about these?" She looked horrified. "Oh shit," was all she said. It was the look on her face a look that told the story she looked scared. "So that?s all you have to say for trying to fucking kill me?" She was sniffling holding back the tears. "Baby please they are harmless they are just to help with your transition." "Harmless," I screamed. "Fucking harmless my arse. Here are some of the side effects of taking these things Lauren and they come directly from the doctor." I angrily spat out the consequences. "Loss of bone and muscle density, the bones become porous and brittle, increased risk of prostate cancer, shrunken testes and penis, erectile dysfunction and sterility. Not to mention the psychological harm, not surprising I have had such wild mood swings and I cry all the time." She was trying to hold my hand but I snatched it away. She was shaking her head. "Kelli I think you are over exaggerating it a little. I don?t think it?s as bad as that." I reached into my bag and threw down all of the research papers I had downloaded off the internet. "Really, so all of these doctors have got it wrong have they?" She honestly looked shocked and broke down. "Kelli I didn?t know. You have to believe me. I read an article in a woman?s magazine about how men transitioning use them to ease their transition. I thought they were harmless honestly. Baby I would never give you something on purpose that would harm you." "For fuck sake why didn?t you tell me? Why didn?t you at least talk to me about it?" "Baby I am sorry, at the time you weren?t even dressing as Kelli and you were being so hardnosed about the whole thing I knew you wouldn?t take them, that?s why I didn?t tell you." "So you just made a Q1 decision and decided you knew what was best for me? You put my life in danger without even consulting with me. I can?t believe how selfish you are Lauren. I am so angry right now I feel like slapping you." Alecia had sat through the whole thing without saying a word. I watched her face intently. "Did you know about this Alecia?" She was shaking her head, but remained silent. Lauren jumped up from her chair. "Baby no one knows except me. I did it. Alecia wasn?t even living with us then. You can?t be mad at her. You have to take it out on me." She walked up and hugged me. "Please baby please, you have to forgive me? I didn?t know about the side effects. It was stupid I know, I should have done some research but the article made it sound so simple. Michael believe me I am sorry." She was bawling. "Fuck you Lauren you selfish self-centred bitch. All you care about is what you want. Don?t worry about the fact you could have harmed me. The doctor wanted to know who gave me the tablets. He wants me to lay criminal charges against whoever gave them to me. I lied to him, I lied to save your arse." She looked across at Alecia looking for support but she was saying nothing. "I have had it Lauren this is too much. I can?t live with you at the moment. I am going to move out." "No baby please don?t leave, we can?t work it out if you leave. It?s not fair on Alecia she didn?t do anything wrong." "No, I can?t stay here otherwise I am going to say things or do something I know I will later regret." I packed a couple of bags. While I was packing Alecia walked in behind me and wrapped her arms around me. "Shit babes, I am sorry. I don?t know what to say. Lauren has done the wrong thing but moving out? Do you think that will help? Don?t you think that you are overreacting? Wouldn?t it be better to stay so we can talk this through and see what happens?" "No this is the last straw for me. Every other time I have forgiven her but this time I don?t think I can. It?s her disregard for me, her lack of trust in me. I mean I hadn?t even decided to go down this path. If I had stayed as Michael what sort of freak would I be?" The tears were flowing and I was crying again, fucking tears. I have become a wreck. I walked out got in the car and drove away. All day I had been thinking about how this would play out. Where to live was the top priority. One of the seamstresses had been talking about an apartment down on the waterfront that she had moved out of because she had moved in with her boyfriend. I called into the office got her details and gave her a call. I didn?t tell her everything but she was happy to meet me there in an hour and show me through it. It was pretty nice, a balcony looking out over the ocean. And the price was right although I had to sign a twelve month lease. That bit was hard, it was like I had already made my decision. My hand shook as I signed. The only problem was it was empty, no furniture, oh well at least I could smell the ocean. I went down to the department store and brought a camp stretcher, sleeping bag, a kettle and a toaster. That night I slept out on the balcony with the sound of the ocean ringing in my ears. There were numerous calls from Lauren. Thank god for messagebank. Work the next morning was hard, Candy was chasing me around trying to find out what the problem was. Eventually she cornered me and there was no escape. I told her what had happened, she nodded her head. "Yeah I can?t say I am surprised. Remember back to our first meeting I said I had never seen anyone transition as easily as you. I thought then that you must have been taking hormones. I am sorry sweetie but it?s not the end of the world you know. It really has helped your transition you look fabulous and you can stop taking them. It takes years for some of the effects to happen anyway and I am guessing that the dose rate is fairly low." I glared at her questioningly. "So you take them Candy?" She grinned. "Yes sweetie I do, but I take a very low dose, just enough to help with the transition. I love my cock and I don?t want to lose it." We both laughed. "Yeah me to, otherwise what would I have to play with in the bath?" The weekend was rolling around and I thought it would be nice to go for a ride. So during the middle of the day I got a taxi over to our place so I could get the 996 out of the garage and ride it back to the apartment. Alecia called and asked if I would come home to see if we could sort things out? She pleaded. "Babe please, Lauren is an absolute wreck, she done nothing but cry since you left. She knows what she did was wrong, honestly she is so remorseful." "No I am sorry but I don?t want to talk at the moment, I am still way too angry to talk." I was trying not to sound curt or short with her, I mean it wasn?t her fault, but I couldn?t separate Alecia and Lauren, it was like they were one being. There?s nothing she could say to me that would make this any easier. The next week raced by, I started going to Tae Kwon Do every day, and I met a woman there who was a regular attendee. She was a novice and still learning so I helped her with her stretches and we ended up talking and became quite friendly. She sensed that there was some tension in my life. I didn?t tell her what but I nodded and agreed that I was tense and angry at the moment. She suggested I should try yoga as a good method of relaxation. She was an instructor at a local gym. What did I have to lose? Yeah I thought why not I will give it a shot. After the first class I was hooked, it was awesome. There was another plus, the outfits were amazing. I spent days shopping for sexy leotards. They are necessary but fuck they are so damn sexy, I loved it. Yoga became part of my daily routine, yoga in the morning and Tae Kwon Do in the evenings. While on a break at the yoga class I met another lady, she was middle aged but still very attractive, but what amazed me was how flexible and agile she was. She told me she has been practicing Tai Chi for many years. She invited me to a class that she attends. The Tai Chi was amazing as well. So now I did Tai Chi and then Yoga in the mornings. My dance card was pretty full. My appointment with the surgeon was looming quickly and I needed to get my mind around this, once done it would be hard to go back. I thought about my life as Michael, how hard it was. I could never seem to make my mark on the world. Suddenly with the arrival of Kelli that had changed, suddenly people were falling all over me, they took me seriously. It was however deeper than that, as Kelli I felt normal, I felt like I was complete I seemed to fit better as Kelli. My mind was made up I was going through with it. The surgeon gave me the full run down on the operation. Although it wasn?t dangerous or life threatening, there would be bruising and I would be uncomfortable for a few days after the op perhaps even up to a week or so. He suggested I take at least one week off work as a precaution. I had a chat to Candy and Siobhan, and organised for them to cover me for a couple of weeks. I convinced them that I just needed some time to myself. The operation went smoothly and there were no complications. None, except I felt totally weird. I had been wearing breast forms for ages and didn?t think it would feel that different, but it did. I could feel the weight. Maybe it was the bruising and swelling but they felt enormous. I went back to the apartment and locked the doors, took the painkillers they had given me and crashed. For the next couple of days I just laid around the house feeling sorry for myself. I don?t know if it was the isolation but it seemed to hit home that I was alone, this was now my world. I was single and alone. I got call after call from Lauren asking if I was OK and whether we could get together. She had obviously heard through Candy that I was taking time off work. Still feeling pissed off with her and suffering a little loneliness, I spat out, "What do you care," and hung up. Later Alecia tried as well shortly after I had hung up on Lauren. "Hi babes I just wanted to touch base. We are worried about you." "I am OK, I am just feeling a bit stressed and thought a couple of days off might help." She offered to visit and cheer me up. "No thanks, I?m not very good company at the moment." By week number two I felt like I could face the world, so decided to go out and see a movie. It took ages to find something I liked in the wardrobe. I had only picked up a few clothes when I walked out of the house. It felt weird yet wonderful to have boobs, the swelling had already reduced and they weren?t so tender to touch, in fact I was starting to enjoy playing with them, nothing major just running my hands over them and giving them a little squeeze. Still some of my clothes were now a very tight fit across the bust. I must have tried on a dozen outfits before settling on a black shift style dress, I wore a loose fitting jacket that covered my boobs and I added a scarf to cover the small bruising on my neck. In the end I felt pretty comfortable with my selection. I didn?t care what movie was showing I just needed to get out of the apartment and be around people and mingle a little. As I was standing in line for the movie I noticed a young guy standing off to the side, he was watching me surreptitiously out of the corner of his eye. Every time I looked up at him he would look away, never able to hold my gaze. I smiled inwardly I knew how that felt. I remembered those first months at college where I so desperately wanted to talk to girls but couldn?t raise the courage. I got a drink and went to wait in line. The young guy came and fell into the line a few people behind me. As I was walking into the theatre I heard a bit of ruckus behind me, it was the young guy, the usher was pushing him back out because he was at the wrong theatre. I laughed aloud, what a dork, how did he think he was going to get in? I found a seat relaxing back getting comfortable when I saw the young guy come racing in, he stood in the aisle for ages scanning the room, then when he spotted me he quickly darted his eyes away and then casually walked up sitting in the row behind me. I mean the theatre was almost empty he could have sat anywhere but he chose the seat behind me. Nothing more happened until the movie was finished and I was leaving, he fell in step behind me following me closely. I stopped outside the theatre and looked around deciding maybe a coffee would be nice. There was a little caf? in the complex below my apartment so I meandered back with him following like he was on a covert mission or something. Every time I stopped to look in shop windows he would stop or cross the road before falling in behind me a couple of hundred metres. It was comical, but it also made me nervous, what if he was a rapist or something? No I was just being paranoid. Still I was happy when I got to the safety of the caf?. I ordered and sat at a table where I could look around the room. He came in a couple of minutes after I sat down. I took the opportunity to look at him more closely, he was tall, maybe six foot, he was handsome in a rustic sort of way. He had brown hair and was wearing the new designer facial stubble that seemed so popular with men these days. Not a beard as such just not cleanly shaven. It suited him perfectly because it didn?t look fake as it did on some guys who were just following a trend. He was slim without being skinny and he was dressed well. Hmmm not a bad package I thought with a smile. I drank my coffee and read a couple of magazines as he sat a few tables away drinking his coffee. The magazine gave me a warm fuzzy as I noticed one of our ads which featured me in a white cotton frock. I remembered this picture. At the time it seemed pure and clean the white dress and stockings. A single string pearl necklace and silver earrings. It was a good picture of me. It was the perfect angle for me and I loved it. I was still a little concerned so I didn?t want him to know my apartment was upstairs. I dallied around toying with the magazines. I waited and waited. Eventually he got up to go to the toilet and while he was gone I snuck out. Once home safe and sound I had a little giggle to myself. I couldn?t help but laugh. He might actually be shyer than I was. The next day I was feeling so much better that I decided to go shopping, I definitely needed a new wardrobe now. Everything I had brought previously was sort of designed not to show too much skin around the breasts. Now I was free to wear some outfits I had been dying to try. I wanted something that would really show off my new cleavage. As I headed down it was close to lunch time and stopped in for a coffee, bugger me if the young guy wasn?t there loitering around outside. At least he didn?t see where I came from. I ordered a coffee and again sat where I could watch him with a little caution. I could see he was fidgeting about in his chair, it looked like he was fighting some internal demons. I guessed he was trying to dig up the courage to come and talk to me. Shit this was a total role reversal. I decided to torture him I went in and out of every dress shop and boutique along the shopping strip. I found a couple of really revealing low cut dresses. I loved yellow, it seems such a bright adventurous colour. I chose a few different ones before heading for home. He followed me the whole way, when I went into shops he followed me and hid behind racks of clothes while he spied on me. I was almost home when I thought enough is enough. I decided to ask him why he was following me. As I approached an intersection I turned to talk to him, but I turned so quickly I didn?t realise how close he was to me. As I turned he walked right into me sending us both sprawling. He jumped up helping me to my feet. "Oh god I am so sorry," he mumbled, "I didn?t mean to do that." I looked into his eyes and I could see the anxiety and nervousness. "It?s OK I sighed no biggie, it was my fault really. I just wanted to know why you were following me." His head dropped and he stuttered, "I um, well I have been trying to build up the courage to talk to you. I am sorry I will leave you in peace." "Hang on Mr. you mean you have been following me around all day waiting to talk to me and now that you are talking to me you want to leave? What?s that about?" He stuttered, "Well I just, oh shit look I am not very good at this. I find it difficult to talk to people, especially woman, and even more so someone as pretty as you." That brought a smile to my face. He smiled and held out his hand. "Um I?m Josh." I liked it when he smiled, his personality changed and he appeared friendly. We shook hands which seemed weird. "Look Josh I am going to the caf? where we went last night. I am going to have something to eat, why don?t we actually sit together this time and you can tell me about yourself." Over the next hour Josh told me all about himself, he was single, he was an architect who worked for a local firm. He loved live music and going to the movies. He had an old MG that he was trying to restore but on a very limited budget. We laughed a lot and he asked about me and what I did. I gave him a very brief explanation of my job. I did tell him that I was off work recovering from minor surgery. He asked all the right questions, was I OK etc., etc. We talked for so long my throat hurt, and I remember the doctor suggesting I limit speech. Josh stuttered, "I am going to the movies again tonight would you like to go?" I agreed without even thinking about it. I said we could meet beforehand and have a drink? He nodded. "I would love to." I went up to my apartment and was crazily going through all my clothes again finding a suitable outfit. By the time I had spread my entire wardrobe over the bed and floor trying to find the right look the phone went and it was Alecia. She wanted to talk, to see how I was and how I was feeling. I said I was Ok and just sitting around thinking. She told me that Lauren was a total wreck and was moping around. She feared that she was going to have a breakdown. She begged me to go back and talk to them, try to see if we could at least be friends? As she talked she started to sob. She was sniffling between words. Hearing the sadness in her voice started me off as well. I cried. "Please just give me some time. I can?t talk to her at the moment." She wouldn?t let go. "Well what about if just the two of us get together and we can talk, would that help?" "No baby, I?m sorry I know this isn?t your fault and I don?t want to get you tangled in our arguments, but the truth is I can?t separate you and Lauren at the moment. I?m sorry that?s just the way I feel." "Kelli, is it still Kelli or is it Michael now?" "It?s Kelli." I sighed. "Thank god," she mumbled. "For what it?s worth I don?t agree with what Lauren did, I think she was wrong. She didn?t think it through. She just got swept up in the emotion of it all. She wasn?t thinking straight." I was taking deep breaths trying to maintain calm. "I can understand that but she has had plenty of time since to tell me." She sucked in a deep breath. "I am not disagreeing with you, I?m just trying to explain why she did it. She did the wrong thing for the right reason. I mean we can all see this beautiful sexy creature that you have become. From the very first time I saw you as Kelli I couldn?t believe how you could be so beautiful. Lauren just wanted to bring that out in you and allow you to shine. I know what she did was wrong but the results are amazing. You must see that, you must see how sexy you are as a woman." In the end I agreed to go over on the weekend and see them both. I was still going through my clothes when I realised I was going to be late for my date with Josh. Then the coin dropped, god I was going on a date with a man! Bloody hell, what was I thinking? I showered and as I soaked under the spray I shaved my legs. They didn?t need it but I just loved the feel of the razor sliding up my legs. It?s so fucking sexy. As I dressed I luxuriated in my favourite part of dressing. I sat on the end of the bed and started to roll my stockings up my freshly shaved legs. Oh my god it never fails to give me an erection. It is pure sex. The silky sexy material sliding up my legs. Fuck it felt so good. The only thing better is lipstick. I love applying lipstick. It is so damn sexy, the taste and smell. My lips feel so much more sensitive and so sensuous. That simple act always makes me feel like a woman. As I looked in the mirror I watched as my lips took on a look of their own. Pouty and sexy bright red and sexy. By the time I met Josh at the caf? I was a bit of a mess, I had talked myself out of this at least half a dozen times, and then convinced myself that it would be OK. Nothing was going to happen. We were just going to the movies! Well it turned out to be a fun night. Josh was really good fun once he let down his guard and opened up. He did have a sense of humour and when he smiled he was so handsome. Handsome I grinned. Shit get a grip girl! For god?s sake he is a man I kept telling myself. For fuck sake, I get a set of tits and suddenly I want to fuck the first guy I meet! What the fuck. Josh was the perfect gentleman throughout the evening, he never pushed too hard, never got touchy feely. It was just a very nice pleasant evening. We ended the date at the caf?, we exchanged phone numbers and I agreed that I would like to see him again. He asked if I would like to go out for a meal and drinks on Friday night? I agreed yes I would like that. He leaned over and gave me a light kiss, which I returned. Friday night rolled up pretty quick Alecia had been ringing me constantly, making sure that I was going to be there Saturday afternoon. That night I had a date with Josh and I needed to get that out of the way first. I chose one of my new dresses it was the low cut black one with string straps. God it fit like a glove and was so revealing. I walked back and forth in front of the mirror just watching and admiring my new shape. The swelling wasn?t completely gone but the bruising was and there was no sign of the stitches, they were underneath and covered by my bra. I went with four inch heels an open toe strappy design that really went with my dress. For my makeup I went with a dark moody look, accentuating my eyes, I wanted to look mysterious and exotic. We met at the caf? again and he led me a couple of blocks down to a little Italian restaurant, it was intimate and cosy. Very romantic in fact, I would need to keep this one in my diary for future reference. We chatted and talked about work. Josh was really into his job he obviously loved it. He becomes a different guy when he gets excited he forgets about everything else. Some women would probably have been bored I suppose, but because of my history in construction I was fascinated and the conversation was great. It was like just being out with a mate. I guess it suddenly dawned on him that he had been rabbiting on and he apologised saying he was a jerk. I patted his hand. "Josh it is OK to be passionate about your job, don?t be ashamed of that." It was so apparent how much he loved his work and he was working on this new project which he was so proud of. We drank a bottle of wine with our meal and I was feeling no pain by the time it was over. Josh helped me up and as we got outside he hailed a taxi. We ended up at a little jazz club, it was small and the crowd was sparse, god I was so glad he didn?t choose one of the glitzy clubs with pounding techno music. He found us a table at a secluded spot and we relaxed listening to the music. The band was awesome, tight and smooth. We worked our way through another bottle of wine before he asked me to dance. As we hit the dancefloor he pulled me in close, it wasn?t to close but it was close enough. As we danced I found myself gliding with him and as he held me tighter I surrendered to his embrace until I was up tight against his body. I could feel his heat through the flimsy fabric of my dress, and I felt his erection which was digging into my tummy. My head rested on his chest as we sort of swayed, we weren?t moving we were just standing there swaying. It came to an end when the band stopped for a break. We had a couple more drinks before I thought I had to go before this went too far, I was losing control. Ever the gentleman he walked me outside and called a taxi which took us back to the caf?. As we were saying goodnight he pulled me in close and kissed me, it was hard and forceful, totally different from kissing a woman. His lips were firm and his stubble was like coarse sandpaper on my cheeks but as his tongue slid into my mouth I didn?t fight it, in fact I returned it with the same enthusiasm. It was Josh who broke the kiss saying goodnight and jumping back in the cab and disappearing into the night. That night curled up in my sleeping bag I felt completely unsettled. It wasn?t just the kiss, it was the feel of his cock pressed up against my tummy as we danced. As I recalled all of the details of the date I slid my hand down until I was stroking myself to an orgasm. As I recovered my breath, I realised he was probably lying in bed doing exactly what I was doing right now. In the morning I set off to the shops. I wanted to wear something today that would show of my new assets. This was my big reveal and I wanted to rub their noses in it. In my heart I knew it wasn?t Alecia?s fault and I couldn?t hold her responsible. It was just every time we spoke she defended Lauren. Regardless of what she said to me, she was definitely on her side! I hunted all morning before I found the perfect dress. It was an A line white dress with a V neckline. Thin spaghetti straps with a low back. It was a cotton blend material and it fit perfectly. I was going to go braless and this was going to be perfect. When I looked in the mirror I realised how short it was. Shit it barely covered my panties? In the end I thought fuck it, if I never wear it again it doesn?t matter, it was perfect for today! Shoes now I was going to need some shoes to go with it, something with a nice heel but not too much. It didn?t take long to find the shoes they were in the window as I walked past the little boutique next to the dress shop. The moment I saw them I forgot entirely about comfort and went with the little twitch my cock gave when I saw them. Once home I spent an age getting my makeup right, it was daytime but I went with a slutty look, I wanted them to see what they were missing. Yeah I was going to rub their faces in it. By the time I was ready to leave I must have spent twenty minutes just walking in front of the mirror, admiring my new shape and the fact there was no Adam?s apple, I didn?t have to wear a choker to hide it. I actually chose the little diamond necklace that Alecia had brought for me, it sat right in my cleavage. Because my breasts were still so sensitive my nipples were hard, hard and pointy, god they were sticking out. I slipped in to the stiletto heeled shoes that looked so sexy. A thin needle point stiletto heel boot that strapped around my ankle. They were open toed and my bright red toenail polish glistened in the light. Yeah I was ready. As I arrived I got out of the car and straightened my dress pulling it down as far as I could. It was no use, the dress still felt to short. I strutted up to the door and knocked. Lauren answered the door and the look on her face was priceless, her bottom lip just about hit the ground. She pulled her hand up to her mouth to cover her surprise. "My god you look fabulous." I could see her eyes going up and down my body as she took it all in. "holy shit" she cried out. "You look incredible." Alecia came running out as well and was going to throw her arms around me but she came to a grinding halt and her expression gave way to shock. "Oh my god Kelli you look gorgeous." "Thanks girls," I replied. "Are we going to stand in the door or are we going in?" They both ushered me in and Alecia grabbed my hand and spun me around. So this is why you haven?t been at work. Can I touch them? Is it painful?" I smiled. "It?s OK they aren?t as sensitive as they were, but they are still a bit tender." Alecia gently cupped my boobs, her hands caressing as she rubbed. Lauren just stood there watching. Alecia sighed. "Bloody hell they feel gorgeous, so soft and yet so firm. They are perfect." I had to pull her hands away. "Steady on, there?s not much room in these panties." Lauren leaned over and kissed me, her hands resting where Alecia?s had just been. "God Kelli, you look different, so slutty and sexy." "Hey." I pulled back. "A little less of the slutty thank you," I whined. Alecia giggled. "Shush, that was a compliment. This look is so different from what you normally wear. It is a little slutty, but it?s classy as well. You look very, very fuckable!" We went into the lounge, Alecia went and poured us some wine and sat beside us. Lauren took a deep breath. "I am sorry for what I did, you are right I was being selfish. At the time I just wanted you to see how beautiful you are and I was so afraid that you wouldn?t see it. I was scared that you would lock Kelli away forever. I was wrong but I only did it for you." "Rubbish you did it for yourself, plain and simple. There was no other reason it was just so you could get what you wanted. It had nothing to do with what I wanted." She was in tears. "Please we want you to move back home. That way we can work through this. We can?t while you are living somewhere else. Please, I said I was sorry!" Alecia cut in. "Babe you can see how upset Lauren is, living apart isn?t helping. Just come back and then we can all work on it together!" "Girls I am not ready to move back home. I don?t know if I will ever be able to trust you again Lauren. Every time I think everything is cool something else crops up. As I drove away I got a warm feeling, normally I would be bawling my eyes out about now, but now I had a new found confidence and a fresh outlook. I felt almost like I was high. I decided to go to one of the nail salons and get a manicure and maybe even a pedicure. That night Josh called asking if I would like to go to a movie tomorrow? I was hesitant, but agreed. What the hell was I thinking, I was so confused. We met up as usual at the caf? and had a coffee before heading into the theatre, Josh paid for the tickets and as we were walking in I felt his hand slide into mine. As we sat and got comfortable I felt his arm slide around my shoulder in that old time wary male manoeuvre. He had brought an extra size coke and as he set it up he poured a small bottle of bourbon into it and gave it a stir with the straw. So we sat back sharing the drink with a couple of straws. It felt like being a teenager and sneaking something we weren?t supposed to. As the movie progressed and the buzz kicked in I nestled my head on Josh?s shoulder and his hand moved until it rested on my boob, he hesitantly played with my nipple, rubbing it with just his finger tip and then squeezing it between his thumb and forefinger. God it felt so sexy, my nipples were so sensitive anyway. Josh tightened his grip around my shoulder and pulled me even closer to him and as I looked up his mouth closed on mine and we descended into a deep kiss. His lips were insistent and compelling. There was no room for argument. His tongue was swirling around my mouth and his hand moved behind my head pulling me harder into the kiss. As we pulled apart he had a huge grin on his face. "Wow that was some kiss." I smiled back my cock was swelling under my dress and if we didn?t stop I wouldn?t be able to walk out of here. I noticed he had to do some adjustments as well which gave me a rush. As we settled back to watch the movie his hand rested on my thigh, he didn?t move it upwards he just rested it there and it felt like he was holding a branding iron on my leg. I couldn?t take my eyes off it as he gave my thigh a squeeze. When he walked me home that night we kissed again and it was a repeat of the previous night, his rough sandpaper like chin rubbing on mine felt so alien but so arousing I was on fire. I had to lean up and stand on tippy toe to kiss him and although he wasn?t forceful I felt like I was under his control, he was in charge. The kiss ended too fast for me and he said good night and wandered off. That night all I could think about was Josh. What would he say if he knew? Would he accept me or would he laugh and hate me? Jesus he might even punch me out. As I prepared for work in the morning I rummaged around looking for the right outfit. In the end I went for a pencil skirt and cream blouse, the blouse was very sheer and you could see my bra through it, I chose a light beige coloured bra to make it less noticeable. I arrived early and was going through my emails when Candy walked in we started to chat away, she brought me up to speed with what had been going on whilst I was away. There was plenty to do and it would take me a couple of days to catch up. While we were talking she kept staring at me, she started to grin. "Stand up she commanded." I stood up and she walked around the desk so she could see me properly. "Oh my god." she screeched. "When did you get those?" I laughed. "That?s why I wasn?t here the last couple of weeks." "Wow why didn?t you say something? I could have come and kept you company, I have been through this, I know what it feels like. Shit girl you look amazing, you could have gone a size bigger though." I shook my head. "No I think they are big enough." She hugged me tight. "Well there?s no going back now." She smiled. "I guess Kelli is here to stay." I nodded. "Yep you are right, there?s no going back. No more running away." We kissed and she walked out shaking her head. "You bloody amaze me sometimes Kelli, you bloody amaze me." Not long after Siobhan came in wanting to catch up as well. "Honey it?s so good to have you back." She sighed. "It?s been bloody hectic. We have a lot of meetings scheduled and there?s a couple of interesting ones, which I think you need to look at." I went and made us both a coffee and we were chatting away when she started to take second glances. "You look different, what have you done?" I just shrugged my shoulders. "Nothing special." She was smiling. "No there?s something you look more elegant, and you..." She stopped and this big smile spread across her face. "Oh my god you have implants don?t you." She walked around the desk and surprised me by reaching out and cupping her hands under my new boobs and squeezed them like she was weighing fruit at a supermarket. "Wow very nice," she whispered conspiratorially, although I noticed it took her a long time to remove her hands. We finished our chat and I agreed to go to lunch with her as she was meeting with a local newspaper reporter who wanted to do an in-depth article about the company. Lauren phoned later in the morning pleading for me to return and work on our issues. We argued back and forth. In the end I agreed. I would come over and cook a nice dinner. Neither of the girls was home when I got there and the place seemed cold, empty. I got stuck in and started to prepare the food. It wasn?t anything special, just spaghetti Bolognese I hunted around and got some glasses and set out the table. As I was putting out the cutlery Alecia turned up and she greeted me with a huge hug and a kiss, the kiss drew out and turned into a very torrid embrace. "Oh god babes I have missed you so much. Lauren has been so hard to live with she has been very depressed. She knows she did the wrong thing. If she wasn?t so depressed I would have moved out, she is driving me fucking crazy." Just as we were breaking from our kiss she walked in. She smiled. "Well you two seem to be getting along well? Can I have some of that." and she walked over pulling me into a tight embrace, and her lips crushed mine in a searing kiss. She pulled away. "I have missed you, god something smells delicious." She grabbed Alecia and kissed her as well. She pushed her up against the bench and forced her legs apart, although in all fairness Alecia wasn?t exactly fighting her off. They continued to make out as I turned back to the dinner. Alecia moaned loudly as she humped her with her leg, driving it up between her parted legs against her pussy. Alecia was almost crying. "Fuck oh god stop babe." Lauren pulled back slowly kissing her exposed cleavage and slid her tongue down into her bra. Alecia?s hands were tangled in Lauren?s hair. I noticed Lauren?s hand had disappeared up Alecia?s dress and the sounds told me her fingers had found a home. She was squirming wildly. "Fuck Lauren, oooh fucking hell babe stop please stop." But her hips were thrusting, bucking on Lauren?s fingers. Her arms locked around her neck and her eyes were closed and her face contorted tightly as she came all over Lauren?s hand. "Nice show girls," I muttered. "Dinner will be in five minutes, looks like you better get changed." Lauren smiled. "Don?t start without us." She held Alecia?s hand and dragged her up the stairs. I served up the food and was seated at the table when they wandered down. "Well Kelli, what did Candy think of your new boobs?" I laughed. "Oh you know she thought it was pretty cool although she thinks I should have gone bigger." "No," she retorted. "They are perfect just the way they are." Lauren nodded. "Yes I think they look great, I can?t wait to feel them naked against me." Alecia giggled. "Yeah me to babe I can?t wait either." She smiled cheekily. "Go on show us a little just lift your blouse." I shook my head. "Sorry girls maybe another day." She pouted. "When are you coming home?" "I am not coming home yet. I don?t feel ready yet. Lauren if things change, or if you can convince me that you have changed then it will be different. At the moment I don?t feel that way." Alecia tried to ease the tension. "Where are you staying at the moment?" "I have rented a small apartment down by the waterfront." Lauren had a deep frown. "Are you seeing somebody else? Is that why you won?t come back?" "Don?t be ridiculous Lauren, I am not seeing anyone. For god?s sake I made a commitment to you and to you as well Alecia. I will never go back on that." Lauren adopted that coy teasing look she uses to get what she wants something. "Well if you aren?t seeing anyone you must be feeling pretty horny by now? Why don?t you just stay the night and let us relieve all that built up tension for you." "Lauren I have already told you the answer is no!" I had barely got in the door at the apartment when my phone rang it was Josh asking if we could go out. This was hard, I knew that if I was going to give my marriage any chance then I couldn?t carry on the way I had been. I had lied to Lauren about seeing someone and it wasn?t right. "No Josh I am sorry but I can?t see you anymore." I didn?t go into details. "I am sorry." He sounded sad and unsure of what to say, I sensed that he wanted to ask why but I think my rebuttal had knocked his confidence. It was funny when we first met he could barely talk to me, but after our third date he was comfortable enough to talk endlessly and he kissed me. This had knocked the wind out of his sails and he was back to the shy uncertain guy. He never did ask why, he just said with resignation. "OK." It wasn?t just the concerns about my marriage that fuelled my decision. I was scared about where this thing with Josh was going. I couldn?t hide from the fact that there was an attraction, and that scared me more than anything else. I tried to convince myself, I am not gay. I repeated it several times like a mantra, a chant almost. I did that many times over the following days as he kept popping up in my thoughts Over the next week or so I spent more and more time at home with Alecia and Lauren and slowly but surely things sort of evened out until one night after way to many drinks we ended up in bed together and to say the sex was incredible would be an understatement. It was everything you could wish for. Make up sex is the best. I could never stay mad at either of these two. I had missed waking up together. I had missed the feel of their naked bodies mashed up against me in bed. Slowly over the next few days we sort of slipped back into our marriage. It was hard for me at first. There was still an uncomfortable peace between Lauren and me. She was trying hard, going out of her way to do everything for me. She did most of the housework. She even washed my car. The very first weekend Alecia dragged us out on one of her epic shopping adventures. We spent ages going through shop after shop. Alecia was determined to buy me a complete new wardrobe that reflected my new body. I tried and tried to say no, but she is a tornado on a destructive path when she is in this mood. We had been shopping for hours and my feet were killing me. Lauren picked up on the fact and dragged us into the little wine bar where we had the run in with Brent. We found a table and were going over the menu when a tray with a bottle of champagne and glasses arrived. We looked at the waiter and he pointed to a guy sitting at the bar. It was the same guy as last time, Brent. Alecia gave him a wave and she and Lauren giggled. "Your boyfriend is certainly persistent." I got up on my soap box. "He?s not my boyfriend. In fact he is probably after one of you." We drank our champagne laughing and joking about our day out. The bottle was going down fast and as we were arguing over whose round it was when Alecia leaned over the table and kissed me. It was passionate and toe tingling. Before I could ask what the hell that was all about Brent turned up with another bottle. "If you girls will do that again I will keep a never ending supply coming all day." They both laughed and invited him to sit with us. I gave him a cold stare. "You don?t take rejection well do you?" He smiled. "Maybe but I know what I like Kelli and I do like you." "So you think it?s OK to go around hitting on married women do you?" "No not normally Kelli, no I don?t. I am sorry if I have offended you," Alecia changed the subject quickly asking about how business had been. Brent didn?t want to let it go. He asked, "Kelli what does your husband think when you are and about getting all hot and bothered with your girlfriends?" I smiled. "I never said I had a husband Brent, I just said I was married." He looked mildly shocked. "Oops sorry my mistake, so there?s hope for me yet?" Alecia giggled and Lauren gave me a strange look. "No Brent there is no hope for you. Not only am I married but you now realise you are the wrong sex. You would need a sex change before I would be interested in you." "Wow you sure know how to pour water on a hot fire." He got up and walked back to the bar shaking his head. Alecia smiled. "Kelli, you can be a real bitch when you want to be." I smiled coolly in return. "I just told him how it is, I didn?t want to lead him on." As we finished up, I complained this is the last time we come here. Over the next few weeks things were wonderful at home, I don?t think Lauren and I had ever got on as well as we were. We did have our ups and downs like every other relationship. It was after one fight which had occurred when the girls tried to get me to party the night away with them at a night club and I had left them to it. The night had ended badly when Alecia and Lauren arrived home rolling drunk and Lauren took the opportunity to abuse me loudly for leaving them to fend for themselves. I got so upset I slept in the spare room. When I got up the following morning I decided to take the bike for a spin. I checked over the 1098 which I hadn?t ridden her for a while, I thought yeah I might go for a ride. As I was getting the bike ready I noticed Alecia and Lauren wander in. They both looked sorry for themselves. I didn?t acknowledge them I just carried on getting ready. Lauren wandered into the garage. "Going for a ride?" I nodded my head in the affirmative. She responded caustically, "What not talking this morning?" "That?s right Lauren I?m not interested in listening to your bullshit, I got enough of that last night." "Come on baby," she moaned. "We all said some things we probably shouldn?t have." "Wrong Lauren wrong, wrong, wrong. You two were just being bitches. You came home drunk and insulted me, what did you think was going to happen?" I jumped on the bike and fired her up. "I am just about to go for a ride to try and clear my head. I really am sick of all of your bullshit." I was looking forward to a nice ride but hardly ten minutes in and it started to rain, it wasn?t just light rain, it bucketed down and I was saturated. I pulled into a petrol station with a covered roof and sat there watching the weather close and the rain drive in. My day was fucked, there was going to be no ride today. I braved the weather and rode over to my apartment. Thank god I still had this place. I showered and sat out on the balcony and looked out over the skyline, there was lightning and thunder as the weather really exploded. I waited all day for the rain to break so I could ride back home and face the music. I was thinking maybe I should just stay here? At least it was quiet, but no, at some point I was going to have to go back and face up to them. They were both sitting at the table drinking coffee, I walked past them straight into the kitchen. I loitered around in there before I couldn?t hold out any longer. I sucked in a deep breath and walked in. They looked back and forth between them before Alecia started, "Kelli we are both sorry for last night. We only wanted a bit of fun and we have been trying to get you to mix better with men in particular. We both agree that nowadays it seems women are much easier for you. At work you seem to get on well with the construction guys. We thought if you could transfer that to social situations it would make it easier for you to be with guys. Why is it so hard when we are out dancing and having a good time?" "Alecia you don?t seem to understand, this is exactly what I have been complaining about. You and Lauren talk to each other about me and make decisions thinking you know what?s best for me. You don?t talk to me you just decide you know what?s best for me. Well let me tell you, you don?t know shit. I have told you I am not into guys, I hate being in situations where they think it?s OK to grope, paw and grab me. I hate that and I was hoping you respected me enough to support that." Lauren replied, "Yeah you are right of course. We didn?t do the right thing the other night and we have apologised for that. We should have taken better care of you last night." Alecia smiled guiltily. "Babes I concede we could have done things better, but I still believe we need to get you into situations like that where you have to interact with men." "I accept that, but there?s a difference between interacting and having sex on a dancefloor." They both laughed. "Shit that?s a bit melodramatic. It?s just a bunch young guys who don?t know boundaries. These days that stuff is accepted at clubs and nobody minds. I sighed. "OK girls I sort of agree. I am trying to be more tolerant but if we go out somewhere and I am not comfortable I expect you to accept I will leave." Lauren frowned. "Maybe we just go slowly, we just dance a little bit and when you get overwhelmed we leave?" "Or maybe we don?t go to clubs at all," I muttered. "If you want to go dancing, you go with Alecia and I stay home." Alecia said, "How does that help? How does that get you past your phobia?" "I meet men every day, I talk to them at work, when we go shopping there are men everywhere. Every day I meet more and more of them. I don?t have to go to clubs to do that." "Babes you need to learn to be in close contact with them, you know dancing, chatting, and flirting." "I can tell you now if you think I am going to let you manipulate my life for your own little social experiment then I?m sorry but it?s a no go. If that?s what you both want then I am prepared to leave." "Fuck Kelli that doesn?t have to be your first reaction. Surely we can work through our problems. Babe you have amazed me so many times, but then when the going gets tough you just leave." After much to and fro they both accepted that they would try to be more supportive and less confrontational. Inside I wondered how long that would last.