Secret Santa Stag free porn video

So, it was about time for the annual Christmas/Holiday party, and as usual, I was more than ready to participate. Of course, I was a lapsed Catholic, but a secret pagan side of me thought of it as Yule, which was the true origin of Christmas, anyway. Anyway, the parties tended to get a little wild at our company, a publishing firm where I was one of the rising young editors. Many of us were single young adults, and it was not unheard-of for a few people to get laid at the thing each year, often in a poorly lit or even dark section of the floor where it was held (sometimes, even on the elevators or other floors, if one was shy or secretive enough).

At any rate, we also held a “secret Santa” deal for our annual festivities, and as always, I was very curious to see whose name I drew from the traditional Santa cap. It was Julia Rosenthal, a relatively new secretary fresh from Princeton, of all places, who despite her Jewish faith seemed intent on taking part with equal enthusiasm. After all, as she put it, Chanukah was already over by the time that Christmas rolled around, and she could easily fit in two or three holidays, “as well as respect all of them.”

Julia had reddish brown hair, rather curly in fact, and while her tits were somewhat on the small side, they didn’t sag and she had the legs and ass to more than make up for it. Her bright blue eyes reflected her Norwegian father, Ivar Thorvaldsen, who had divorced her mother and returned to Norway when he grew homesick and tired of the culture clash of living in New Jersey. Julia’s mother had worked for the Princeton administration and thus she had grown up as a “townie,” which made tuition and admission much easier, especially with the right strings pulled. Ivar never being around to have his input on things, Esther Rosenthal had resumed her maiden name and brought her daughter up in the Faith, albeit Conservative rather than Orthodox or Reform.

Getting Julia’s name, though not really expecting any chance of being with her, especially so soon after Beth and I broke up (during Thanksgiving, after she had expected a marriage proposal and none materialized), I made a special effort to get something far above what was expected from me. I knew for a fact that Julia was fond of antiques. Naturally, therefore, I found a particularly old music box that seemed to fit her taste and I made sure that I didn’t even plant any hints or warnings.

Now, it was never said what we had to buy, so most people bought only under a certain budget, but this was a different occasion, and perhaps I wanted Beth at least a little jealous or even hurt that she wasn’t getting anything from me this year. Most of all, though, I wanted Julia to get the sense that she mattered, at least to me. If nothing else, friendship could develop from acquaintance, and I certainly wouldn’t mind having her as a friend.

Well, I wasn’t ready for what would follow from the chain of events that occurred at the party, which opened with some light eats, some wine, some spirits, some egg nog, some punch, some tea, and some coffee, depending on one’s taste. I poured myself a brandy, in fact, and was sipping it just a little when Beth approached me with a surprising smile on her face. Being the most junior editor on the staff, Beth might under normal circumstances have been intimidated by me, but we had been lovers for about three months when the dreaded Thanksgiving Fiasco occurred and she dumped me for it.

Oddly enough, even though she supposedly found a new boyfriend on the rebound, a douchebag insurance salesman named Chad Hughes, Beth had scarcely concealed her interest in my comings and goings. Even so, given her seeming jealousy and my refusal to avoid female company, I didn’t expect a smile from her that actually seemed sweet. I was instantly suspicious and on my guard, yet she didn’t hesitate to approach me in spite of my obvious caution and mistrust.

“So, going stag to a Christmas party, Victor?” Beth, as always, used my full given name instead of shortening it to “Vic,” which was a rare personality quirk that she shared, oddly enough, with Julia.

“Same with you, as it happens. Where’s Chad?” I observed, feeling guarded still.

“Oh, honey, when are you going to ever learn? Some relationships are real, meaningful, and serious. Some boyfriends matter. And some are like Chad. Shallow, stupid, and more than a little vain,” Beth smiled coyly, “Of course, I think that even as dense as he is, not being invited to the Christmas Party should be the sign that this was just a wild and crazy fling.”

“A fling, eh? So, it was just to pass the time?” I asked curiously, even as Beth got ever close to me, her hands getting a little too close for comfort, even as her face invaded my personal space.

“No, silly, it was to make you jealous!” Beth laughed, now brushing dangerously close to me as she closed the distance and gave me a light, but quite public kiss on the lips.

“So, all boyfriends are not created equal, then,” I mused, trying to let my discomfort combined with my arousal too obvious.

“Most emphatically not! Since when would a mindless, corporate drone like Chad Hughes, who has the IQ of a walnut, ever be the equal to a deep thinker like Victor Mancini, no matter how frustrating I find the level of your profundity at times? You should really know better than that, dear,” Beth said now, kissing me yet again.

“That’s two kisses now, Beth. One could construe this as sexual harassment,” I smirked, but I returned the kiss in spite of my protests.

“One might, but not you. I know better. You know better. You’re Victor Humbert Mancini, and you’re nobody’s victim or fool. You kiss no one that you don’t mean to kiss, and you know that you want to kiss Zoe Elizabeth Mantarakis, don’t you? You still want me, and let’s be blunt here, not all girlfriends are created equal, either, are they, Victor?

“Not even Rosa Cruz, though she’s a lot smarter than Chad Hughes. You’d take her more seriously, if you didn’t know that she was still in love with her husband and is at least a little bit of a good Catholic girl that way. I bet that you fucked her, though. I bet that she was damn good in bed, though so was Chad, I must admit, in his clumsy, raw talented, untutored way,” Beth grinned devilishly at me, even as I shrugged.

“She’s a married woman and I always wanted to fuck one, plus I hate her husband for how he treats her,” I observed, “I’m glad that Chad was a great lay for you, just as Rosa was for me. And, yes, she was that fucking good. Plenty of Latin heat to her. I don’t know how long this affair will last before Catholic guilt overtakes her, so I will enjoy her until that happens. Anyway, what’s this about, honey?”

“This, baby, is a game that you’ll figure out soon enough, but when you do, you can bet your sweet ass that you’ll be glad that you did. You’re a man, yes, so can be dense about women at times, though admittedly, we women can be obtuse in our own ways. Overcomplicating the simplicity of men has that effect, I guess. Even so, you’re probably the smartest man that I know in person, so you’ll get it, dear. For now, let the games begin. Oh, by the way, you’ve been standing under mistletoe,” Beth noted the mistletoe dangling above me all this time.

“Guess that means that I can get a freebie, then,” Rosa spoke behind us, as she planted one on me, “By the way, here’s my panties. Feel free to do whatever you want with them. Just remember that I’ll never take them back from you. They’re your panties now. Consider them my Christmas gift to you. And no, I’m not your secret Santa, but I would gladly be your naughty Elf.”

“My turn,” Julia winked at me as she gave me a light peck on the mouth, too, “Sorry, boss, but you ARE standing under mistletoe. I gotta give you a kiss. I love that rule!”

“Alright, now, I refuse to be left out of the fun!” another voice joined in, and the next thing that I knew, my mouth was invaded by the lips and tongue of Heather Aston, a relatively new intern on the company staff.

“Okay, that was damn good, but to what do I owe the pleasure?” I naturally inquired.

“Well, I’m public property now, so feel free to make use of me. We have about ten to fifteen minutes until they call us together for the gift exchange, so how about you bend me over and take me, dear Mr. Mancini? The copy room should be remote enough for our needs,” Heather invited me as she took my hand and led me to the copy room.

Before I knew it, my pants were down to my knees and my cock had taken Heather like it was old hat to me! My every thrust was met by her own, as she frantically took me deeper on each stroke. That we were doing this bareback didn’t bother me in the least, as I was more than drunk enough to enjoy Heather without such complications interfering with our pleasure.

“Oh, God, this was every bit as great as Beth assured me that it would be!” Heather exclaimed as she squeezed my dick and squirted all over me.

“What do you mean, Heather?” I asked her as my cock shot out my seed inside her.

“She means that I’m your secret Santa this year, and this was but part of your gift from me, the gift of a great quickie with another woman. To be honest, I find it rather exhilarating to see you in action with her, just as the thought of you fucking Rosa Cruz turns me on, too. By the way, did you know Heather here is Canadian and you just gave her an anchor baby? Yeah, she’s fertile as hell right now and you just put your spawn inside her. That’s part of what she gets in return for being my present to you. The other part is just a damn good lay, which you always are,” Beth informed me as she wrapped her arms around my waist.

“That he is, Beth. That he is. By the way, the idea that he’s been fucking you ... and Rosa Cruz, all of that is very hot! He’s really been sticking it to Rosa and hanging horns on her hubby’s head? Good for him!” Heather laughed, “So, Mr. Mancini, were you ever unfaithful to Beth during your relationship with her?”

“Heather, there is no need to call me ‘Mr. Mancini’ after I’ve just fucked you, and yes, Beth already knows that I screwed a few girls, though I never outright denied it. Whether or not you’d consider that cheating when I never promised fidelity, but I didn’t disavow it, either, is a matter of interpretation.

“I fucked that intern, Dawn Fitzgerald, during last year’s Christmas Party and after it, for instance, but Beth must know that by now. Dawn bragged about it and I never denied it. I also never apologized for it or explained it or excused it. It wasn’t wrong. It was just something that I did. Of course, I didn’t ask who else she fucked and she never asked me, which I thought was interesting. I naturally assumed that she wanted marriage as a way of getting me to implicitly or explicitly promise fidelity, but I refused to propose partly for that very reason. Another reason was that I wasn’t sure if she would, or even could, be as faithful as she seemed to wish me to be.

“Until such things were clarified, I wasn’t about to propose marriage or agree to it or anything that might imply or suggest monogamy, because I am not a one-woman man. I have never been one and I never will be one. It’s just not me. What’s more, I am not sure that Beth is a one-man woman, and come to think of it, she has never bothered to make any such claims, either, which puzzled me when she got upset over the lack of a proposal on Thanksgiving Day. It never occurred to me that she would be hoping for marriage so early on, with everything still up in the air and undefined,” I asserted, while Beth kept fondling my ass and now guided it back inside Heather’s twat for an encore.

The next thing I knew, Beth’s fingers were up my ass as I fucked Heather again, all three of us heated in our lust, a surprise threesome that pleased me very much in spite of my cautious words and feelings during this party so far. Heather began really pushing back hard at me, all over again, her hips working their magic in tandem with mine as I pounded her sweet pussy to the point of mutual ecstasy.

“Okay, now, Victor, you’ve said your piece, but while you’re getting a piece, I will speak mine. I get it now. I understand now why you didn’t anticipate that I wanted to marry you, still want to marry you, in fact. Yes, you caught me. I’m not the poster child for fidelity any more than you are. I was intimate with other men, and frankly, other women, too, during our relationship. And I will be again when we resume it ... and when we get married.

“Now, now, hear me out, babe. Don’t jump to conclusions. I have no interest in making a wimp or cuckold out of you, I swear. I never did. Do you not realize that I walked into our relationship with my eyes wide open from the very beginning? I not only knew that you were a skirt-chaser, I loved that about you! Are you kidding me, honey? Who could possibly make a better mate for a slut like me, and yes, I am a slut, I admit it, and I own my slutdom, than a philanderer like you?

“Why wouldn’t I want to marry a man like that once I found him, a man after my own heart, a man with the same deliciously lecherous nature as myself? The slut husband, a perfect companion to the slut wife, my dear! So, yes, I learned about you and Dawn Fitzgerald, and frankly, it turned me on so much that I went after Dawn myself right after you and had my way with her as well. I was her first ever woman, took her Sapphic virginity, and she wrote me later thanking me for that, too ... and thanking you for taking one of her other cherries ... her anal one.

“Yes, she sent you thanks through me, because she knew that I would eventually pass her words on to you. Feel free to read it some time if you wish, the letter, I mean. In any case, that’s why I wanted you to propose to me, so that you and I could get married in time to commit adultery together at this year’s Christmas Party, but unfortunately, you forced me to postpone my plans. I guess that I should have just popped the question myself and explained why, but like most women, I tend to forget that men aren’t mind readers and don’t do well with hints.

“So, there, that’s part of my gift to you as well ... the gift of a slut wife for the rest of your life, if you’ll have me. The ideal wife for a man like you, one who will not only wink at your extramarital pleasures, but help arrange them for you now and then. Little surprises like Heather here, and unless I miss my guess, she’s very keen on being intimate with you quite often in the future. So, how about it, Victor? Want your very own slut for Christmas? I promise never to let jealousy get in the way of the kind of marriage that we both want! We can both be sluts together!” Beth assured me as I kept pumping inside Heather and she continued fingering my asshole.

“Oh, God, yes! That feels great! Okay, you sold me on it! Next Christmas, we can be the adulterous couple at the Christmas Party, each fucking others before going home to each other!” I declared as I kept pounding Heather’s cunt.

“Good, because I want to be your girlfriend, Mr. Mancini! Yes, I’m going to keep calling you that, sir, especially now that we’re intimate! It really turns me on to get fucked by my boss! Beth, you’re okay with your husband having a girlfriend, right?” Heather urged my now fiancee.

“Honey, my future husband already has a married girlfriend, okay? You know, Rosa Cruz? She’s got a husband herself and I have no desire to make him stop fucking her, not now that I have him for myself. I was just envious before when I spoke. Now that I get my fair share of Victor, more power to her if she wants to cheat on Thomas Cruz with him! I hate Thomas Cruz, too! The more Victor hangs horns on his head, the better, if you ask me! So, sure, if you want to date my fiance, go for it! Enjoy him! I hope that he gets to bed Julia Rosenthal, too, just as he seems to wish.

“By the way, dear, I’ve been screwing Chad Hughes off and on since before we dated. I don’t think that you care, do you? He’s a fine lay, as I said. Just not good husband material, that’s all. It has nothing to do with fidelity. None of us are the faithful sort. It’s just that he’s an idiot and all that we have in common is sex. Nothing else. Oh, and I’ve been sleeping with the boss, too, but I didn’t think that you would mind that, either. I’m going to keep fucking him and Chad, until I tire of them, just as I hope that you don’t drop Rosa, Heather, or Julia any time soon,” Beth informed me as Heather and I came together, my seed shooting once again toward her womb.

“No, I honestly don’t care if you fuck half the men in the firm, as long as you don’t mind me screwing half the women,” I told Beth, even as I pulled out of Heather and both ladies knelt to share the taste of the intern’s twat on my dick.

“You have a yummy slit, dear. Mind if I eat you out now and then?” Beth propositioned Heather, who shrugged.

“I can be Beth’s girlfriend, too, if you’re both okay with that. I can be Beth’s and Mr. Mancini’s girlfriend. You can share me with each other, just as I would be sharing both of you with the other,” Heather suggested.

“Works for me, then. That’s another part of my gift to you. A girlfriend to share. Hey, would you like to swap panties and spend the rest of the party wearing each other’s underwear? I think that would be hot myself, feeling your damp pussy juices on my own crotch!” Beth said as she wiped her fingers clean with a wet wipe.

“I like the sound of that. Yeah, let’s do it!” Heather handed her thong to Beth, who slipped it on while giving her the silk panties that she brought to work with her.

“Okay, I think that we need to go back before they send out a searching party for us to do the gift exchange. I only hope that Julia likes my secret Santa gift to her,” I laughed as we headed back to the party.

“Oh, honey, you’re such a sweetheart when you want to be. I bet you that Julia will cream herself when she realizes how much you like her. I know that I did when you first hit on me,” Beth assured me, just as our boss, Lewis Evans, announced the gift exchange.

Rosa’s gift from Lewis turned out to be the first one and it aroused a bit of comment, as it was a thinly veiled insult to her absent husband: a set of sex toys clearly meant to get her off. She not only didn’t get offended at the risque gift, she gave the boss a full-on lip lock and whispered something unmistakably sexual in his ear. He blushed a little in spite of himself, even as he winked and gave me a thumbs-up.

“What did you tell him?” I asked Rosa as she came up to me, my cock still smelling of Heather’s snatch.

“That my top fantasy was to have him use my mouth while you fucked my ass and one of the women here used the strap-on dildo and thigh harness from his collection on my cunt! You don’t mind if I actually fuck him now and then, do you, because I have and I do ... and I will now and then,” Rosa confessed to me.

“Rosa, you’re a married woman. You’re already committing adultery with me on a regular basis. Do you really think that I’m bothered by you bending over for Lewis Evans, our boss, the editor-in-chief of the firm? I know that post-modern HR twats get their panties in a wad over ‘inappropriate workplace affairs, ‘ but screw them! Beth is already sleeping with him and I’m okay with that, just as she is okay with me doing you and Heather. I wouldn’t be shocked if Heather was sleeping with him, too. None of that stopped Beth and me from getting engaged just now, right after I fucked Heather twice in the copy room, and I’m still hoping to get into Julia’s pants, too,” I chuckled now.

“See, this is part of why I feel safe sleeping with you. I know that you will always have other women and you know that I will never leave Thomas. Sorry, but it’s true. He’s a real bastard, but he’s my bastard. Yes, I cheat on him, but I will never leave him. You’re smart enough to know that we have can only be an adulterous liaison and you’re cool with that. I’m still in love with Thomas, weird as that sounds. I just can’t help it. Besides, I’m Catholic. I might step out on my husband, but I would never divorce him. Now that you’re going to be married, you’ll be even safer as a paramour for me. It will be double adultery, too, even spicier. Plus, you’re Catholic, too, so you would never divorce Beth, so I’m even safer,” Rosa explained her thinking.

“Yes, that’s true. Once Beth and I tie the knot, it’s a done deal and there are no take backs. We’ll both be fucking around on each other when we’re sixty, most likely, and still come home to each other to fuck each other blind and limp. It’s just how it is,” I remarked, even as Julia’s name was called out and she opened her music box to her surprise.

“Okay, who did this? Please tell me! I want to know who my secret Santa was! This must have cost a pretty deal, and this note on it, ‘Whether Friend Or Lover, I Will Always Stand By You.’ That ... means so much, but I want to know who sent it, to know who honestly feels that way about me!” Julia asked aloud, even as Beth, Heather, and Rosa all pointed to me.

“It was Victor,” Beth finally declared aloud.

“Victor, do you like me that way? Honestly? Can I really count on you? I always thought that you were just a ‘love ‘em and leave ‘em’ type, though admittedly a nice guy in spite of that. What exactly are you, then, if not what I thought? I mean, you’re having an affair with Rosa, everyone knows that, you fucked Dawn Fitzgerald at last year’s party, and your relationship and break-up with Beth are no secret. Plus, it’s quite clear from the way that Heather led you out of the room that you’re fucking her now, too. What gives, what’s the deal, Victor?” Julia asked me directly, which was refreshing from a woman, but maybe that was the Jersey Girl in her.

“Well, I am the ‘love ‘em’ type, but ‘leave ‘em’ not as much. I mean, sure, Beth dumped me, but now that she wants me back, I’m engaged to her. I have no intentions of dropping Rosa if I can help it. Dawn moved away or else I’d probably still be screwing her on a consistent basis. And now that I’m also dating Heather, with Beth’s blessing, I fully intend to keep her, no matter how many times she might sleep with someone else, including Beth herself. I know that she’s a bit wild, but that’s fine with me. So, yes, if you want to be with me, Julia, I will gladly take you as a lover. Just accept that there will be other women. I won’t care if you have other men, either. Or other women, for that matter.

“If, on the other hand, you just want to be friends, that’s okay with me, too, and I will be a damn good friend to you. I won’t complain about being ‘friend-zoned, ‘ and you can always change your mind about that, too. So, that’s the deal. I’m not faithful, but I am loyal, and yes, there IS a difference. That, my dear, is the meaning of my ‘secret Santa’ gift to you, and why it was the kind that it was,” I explained, just seconds before Julia walked over to me and planted the wettest, steamiest French kiss that she could on my lips.

“There, honey. Not exactly a ‘let’s just be friends’ gesture, is it? All I wanted from you was to be honest and level with me, and you did. Thank you for being an adult and treating me as one, not as a delicate flower who can’t handle the truth. I, too, am loyal, but not exactly faithful, and yes, I’ve been sleeping with Mr. Evans, but all of the women do that. He’s fun, but so are you. I don’t intend to stop, but if you’re okay with me screwing him, I have no problem sharing you with Beth, Rosa, or Heather. Or Dawn if she ever returns. I just didn’t want mind games, false promises, and some player trying to play me. If you’re honest and fair with me, I’ll be honest and fair with you. By the way, you know that I’m Jewish, right? That’s not an issue for you, I hope,” Julia replied with pleading eyes.

“Babe, I knew that you were Jewish when I saw your last name. Not exactly an issue for me. I’m a Catholic, you’re a Jew, so what? Heather’s an Anglican, if I recall correctly. Doesn’t bother me. Beth’s Greek Orthodox. Who cares? Mr. Evans is a Mormon, for that matter, and it doesn’t stop him from screwing various women. Dawn was a Baptist. Rosa is Catholic, too, and stepping out on her presumably Catholic husband. So what? My first girlfriend when I started here was a Muslim, my second an atheist, and yes, I fucked both of them, and, yes, both of them were interns.

“I once screwed a nun. It’s true! I lifted her habit, yanked down her panties, balled her like crazy, and she loved every second of it! We never did it again, and to my knowledge, she never broke her vows again, but it was worth it to sample the forbidden fruit for once.

“In college, I was screwing two of my professors, who were a lesbian couple, by the way, and when school was over, they invited me over to dinner, where they lured me into bed for a threesome. Obviously, they were bi, not gay. Turns out that they were using me for my sperm and I was happy to donate it to them quite naturally. They both ended up on maternity leave in short order and they now have two kids, Aaron and Sharon, one from each of them, both of them mine by blood, though I signed away my parental rights.

“At the time, I had a girlfriend in Israel and I didn’t hide it from her, any more than she hid her flings with male comrades in the IDF from me when she wrote me letters from her base. I also slept with several activist types, two of them Democrats and one of them a College Republican. One was a Communist, seriously! I had my only gay relationship so far in college, too, with my roommate Joel, who was a freak in bed and an outright homosexual, unlike me. He was a bit versatile at first, but we eventually discovered that he preferred to bottom with me and I preferred to Top with him, at least.

“My point being that I don’t have those kinds of hang-ups. I just don’t,” I declared, even as Julia gave me a lip lock, followed by Heather’s, Beth’s, and Rosa’s.

“So, are we agreed that we’re your girlfriends, then, and you won’t simply drop us for screwing Mr. Evans or other men? Can we be Mr. Evans’ girlfriends, too? Mr. Evans, are you okay with sharing at least four women with Mr. Mancini?” Heather asked us both bluntly.

“I’m okay with sharing you ladies with Mr. Evans or anyone else, for that matter. If I don’t mind Rosa staying married to a jerk like Thomas, why would I mind her sleeping with Mr. Evans?” I observed while kissing all four ladies’ hands.

“Hey, I got four girlfriends and I still have a wife somewhere in the world, probably schtupping some Frenchman in Nice, but who cares? If Victor and I can agree, as gentlemen, to share the four of you with each other, and with other men ... and women, I take it, why should there be a problem? True, I’m a pathetic joke of a Mormon, but I’m a great husband, father, and editor, so three out of four ain’t bad. Deal, Victor? Deal, girls? You all date him ... and me. Permanently? No break-ups!” Lewis Evans actually shook my hand and I accepted the handshake, man to man.

“What about me?” Dawn arrived rather abruptly, crashing the Christmas Party, “I slept with both of you, too. And with Beth. And I want to resume doing it ... forever.”

“Make that five girlfriends to share. We’re both going to be quite busy, aren’t we? What brings you back, dear?” I asked Dawn with a kiss as Mr. Evans clapped me on the back and fondled her ass a little.

“Well, it turns out that I’m a nymphomaniac. Seriously! Diagnosed, no less! So, I came clean with my boyfriend, who dumped me in a hurry when he heard that, and I returned here to the men and women who loved me for what I really am: a slut. And, yes, Beth knew about this already. She knew that I was coming. I’m part of your ‘secret Santa’ gift from her, too,” Dawn admitted to me, just as Thomas himself showed up, angry, drunk, and carrying nunchucks, no less!

“Alright, you two jerks, which of you is fucking my wife?” Thomas roared, swinging wildly in a way that would render the illegal martial-arts weapons almost useless ... almost.

“Both of them are, baby, and they’re going to keep doing it, as long as they wish to, which is apparently for the rest of my life ... and the duration of our marriage. And, no, dear, I’m not filing for divorce or leaving you. I’m not granting you a divorce, either. We’re not going to end our marriage. We’re going to be married for life, just as we swore to be.

“Look, you silly, selfish, jealous bastard! You’re a real prick of a man and you’ve been a lousy husband, but you’re MY lousy husband and I’m keeping you! Listen up and put those fucking things down before you hurt yourself or somebody else! I know about you and your double life, Thomas William Cruz, so don’t even try to be all preachy with me!

“Your exaggerated machismo, reckless gambling, and ‘downlow’ scene with all those guys don’t impress me! I don’t mind being dominated, sexually, but that’s quite different from being bullied, controlled, and abused by my own husband! I have seen your Grindr account and profile, baby! I know about your trysts with male campaign aides and pages in the legislature. I know what kind of legislator you’ve been since your party leadership blackmailed you with threats of exposure.

“Yes, I know about your secret and illegal activities, about your visits to Bangkok, Rangoon, and Manila, about your fun with the houseboy, and by the way, I fucked him, too. He’s yummy, I must admit. I don’t know what you did with him, but I can guess, given your profile and messages. You have a taste for young, male ass. I don’t blame you!