One funny day in college
- 4 years ago
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My name is Jim, and I’m twenty-two. I’m in college, and I have this roommate, named Ed. He is twenty-three, and always seems to have bad luck when it comes to the ladies. There was one time, when we were at a club, that he was trying to pick up a couple chicks. There were two ladies, and he actually thought he was gonna get us both lucky.
‘You know ladies, those beer bottles aren’t the only hard objects around you,’ he said.
They both just laughed, and walked away.
‘Dude, what the hell was that?’ I asked him.
He was a little buzzed by then, so he couldn’t completely be blamed for the words that came out of his mouth.
The trip to San Francisco, California, goes at a faster pace than Boone likes because Peter, the trader, is pushing to get there and back home. Boone has little choice about matching Peter’s pace if he wants to get the extra money for hauling the goods. At camp on the night after the first full day Boone walks over to Peter and ask, “Is this the pace you’ll be keeping all the way to San Francisco and back to Arizona City?” Peter looks up at Boone from where he’s sitting as he says, “Only on...
After Boone sees everyone in the camp is properly set out for their first night in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania, he goes over to the cooking fire for the Gray contingent, asks for both Olive and Nellie to walk with him, and he walks toward the horses. He stops short of the rope corral they’ve put up for the stock, turns to the two young ladies, and says, “A couple of weeks back your mother told me both of you want to be my wife and have insisted I’ll be your man for some years. Is that...
The trip of about five hundred miles to Santa Fe should take them about twelve to fourteen days to make the journey. After much talking on who’ll go Mary decides Nellie and Sam will accompany Boone and he’s to hire three or four of the Apache as scouts. After the decision is made preparations are made for the trip, the three family members will share the gold between them in their saddlebags, and the ladies will lead two pack-horses carrying their camping gear and food supplies. To ensure...
Bright and early on Monday July 1st, 1861 the doors to the barn are opened and the four wagons move out. Yesterday afternoon was spent cleaning up the barn and stables and now they’re leaving after several weeks of living there while getting ready to go west. Three of the wagons are fully loaded and the fourth is mostly loaded, they’ll finish loading it when they reach Columbus, Ohio, where they plan to buy a great deal of salt. Nellie is at the reins of the lead wagon pair with Heidi in...
When rolling into town mid-morning Boone has a stray thought of, Something must be wrong! This is a Tuesday, not a Monday. We never get anywhere except on a Monday. He’s amused by the thought. During the afternoon they talk while they unpack the wagons, and Boone says, “While in Council Bluffs I caught up on the news. There’s been a dozen or so battles between Army units in Missouri since April, hundreds of shootings and killings in Kansas, and militia attacking the people all over Kansas...
Following the talks in December 1859 Mary, Heidi, and Boone start their preparations to leave Virginia. Materials and things are bought and put aside, for now. The tensions and troubles increase with each passing month of 1860. Mary, Heidi, and Boone become more worried with each rise in the tensions between the two major political forces. Boone starts to build a wagon like his father made using his father’s drawings which Mary has. They don’t have a farm wagon so he builds two of the large...
Howlaween It was Halloween night and the house was still. I settled in with a bourbon boiling brew and chocolate bars. Finally alone downstairs I had a chance to go through a large orange plastic jack-o-lantern found after scores of years in the attic. I poured out the contents inside my eyes lit up as bundles of vanished photos wrapped in orange and black ribbons like presents from decades fell to the coffee table. They had been mislaid decades earlier and found after my wife, Hermione,...
The trail west from Fort Laramie, Nebraska Territory, is well marked due to the many hundreds of wagons along the trail in the past twenty years. Many of the worst parts of the trail have been improved by earlier wagon-trains; which just means the trail is wide enough for the wagons, it’s well marked, also some water crossings have stones in them to stop the crossing from washing away, and some of the worst crossings now have ferries in place to make them easier. There are still some places...
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I tried to sleep, and I nodded off for a few hours, but it didn’t stick. I was tossing and turning. I was hot, and my various joints and muscles were aching me more than usual, or perhaps I was just more conscious of it than I usually am. In any case, I was tossing and turning. I was conscious, too, that this might be hurting Kelly’s quality of sleep. After an hour or so, I was wide awake, nervous, in pain, and feeling like a nuisance. I got up and went back to the downstairs bar. While we...
Wishbone: Along Came Jacki By The Sympathetic Devil [email protected] Dave came home from work early, his bitchy boss having told him he wouldn't be needed there anymore. He hated his life! How was he ever going to get laid when he was unemployed and still lived in his mother's apartment at 25? Something was weird. His mother's clothes are scatted all over the living room. She pitched a fit if Dave so much as left his jacket on the arm of the couch, but now her bra is...
Please email me at AngelJediGirl (at) gmail (dot) com before posting this story to any other site. Posting to a pay site is prohibited. Comments and suggestions are also welcome at the above email address. --- Sarah Carerra By AngelJedi (Released: March 1, 2010) Chapter 24 - Holliday Surprise Wednesday morning had me dreading school again. I couldn't believe that the day before I had been excited to go to school as Megan. Now, I was considering dressing up as Brett again....
Dave came home from work early, his bitchy boss having told him he wouldn’t be needed there anymore. He hated his life! How was he ever going to get laid when he was unemployed and still lived in his mother’s apartment at 25? Something was weird. His mother’s clothes are scatted all over the living room. She pitched a fit if Dave so much as left his jacket on the arm of the couch, but now her bra is hanging from the ceiling fan. Her clothes weren’t the only ones either. A man’s jeans and...
Chapter 1: Doomsday in Metropolis It was just a normal Tuesday in downtown Metropolis. Clark Kent, Bruce Wayne, and Diana Prince were in the middle of ordering coffee at the local superhero themed diner to enjoy civilian life for once. “I’ll take mine black” Bruce said to the waitress that was dressed as Wonderwoman. “Typical, let me guess you’ll have the toast extra dark too.” The real Wonderwoman said in jest at the brooding billionaire. Clark smirked, though they had faced down gods together...
Please email me at AngelJediGirl (at) gmail (dot) com before posting this story to any other site. Posting to a pay site is prohibited. Comments and suggestions are also welcome at the above email address. --- Sarah Carerra By AngelJedi (Released: January 4, 2010) Chapter 16 - Holliday Dinner Dad, acting as our agent instead of my dad (I hoped), had made us reservations at an upscale restaurant. I also found out that pulling a limo up to the door was not exactly the best...
Hi! Mera naam Vinod haa par mee apnee nickname Suckhot1 (mail id: ) se apnee nett dostto see chat kartaa huu. Voo apnee chudeeyee kee story mujhee brief mee batatee haa ferr mee us chudeeyee par ek spicy story develop kartaa huu. Meree saree stories sacch haa readers manee yaa naa manee ye un par nirbhar kartaa haa. Meree abhee ek nayee net frend baneee haa. Uskaa naam ha- Reena. Ab aggee kee chudayee story Reena kee sexy aur methee Shabdoo mee- Hiee , mee Reena Uttar Pradesh kee sabsee badee...
Pluto was rudely awakened by a loud dinner triangle, ringing as Persephone walked down the stairs. “Time to eat up slave!” as she walked down the spiral staircase. Pluto had been locked into the large cage he had seen the night before. He was still completely naked, save for the chastity cage which very uncomfortably suffocated his penis. He looked up and his jaw nearly dropped. He had seen Persephone last night, but that was in a confusing, hazy daze. Now he had his full senses about him and...
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Music wafted through the warm spring air like ribbons of sound, reaching my ears in jumps and starts as I went to answer the phone. ‘…Don’t open ’till doomsday, destruction’s not far away…’ It was the Misfits, playing through my crappy two dollar speakers at the other end of the house. When I reached the phone it had already rung six times. I was really hoping whoever it was would give up, I hate phone conversations. Of course, I had no such luck. ‘Hello?’ I asked, in that...
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Disclaimer: None of these characters belong to me. Harry Potter and all the associated characters named in the story are the property of J. K. Rowling and her publishers and have been used without permission. As fan fiction, no money has been charged, or may be charged, for publication of this work. Hermione Granger had snuck out of the castle that was Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry because Hagrid, the half-giant game keeper, had finally agreed to show her what she had wanted...
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John hadn’t caught her age as things had just moved too fast. She was no teenager, but she couldn’t be more than twenty-five he figured? My god what a body, what a flat stomach and look at her firm tight ass. As her plump raspberry tinged lips enveloped John’s hard cock he groaned again and she giggled at his reaction. She looked more vulnerable and sexy than John thought a woman could be capable of looking. Their wild bedroom antics had tousled her hair and her make-up was streaked and smudged...
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Wishbone LITE By TwoSpiritsTG ----------------------------------------------------------------------- This was a short story I entered into a TG fiction competition a few years back with a 1000 word maximum (This story is 1010 words). For the record, I did win first place. I originally wasn't going to upload it here because of how short it is, but decided otherwise and here we are. If there is demand to expand it to something more I'll gladly do...
"Mount up, babydoll!" he said. At last understanding, Christine squealed and leapt to her feet. She pulled up her skirt and wiggled her hungry red beaver at him. She needed a trim. With a wish, all her pubes fell out, then an arrow-shaped landing strip grew in their place. "Are you really going to fuck me Mr. Phillips?" she asked eagerly. "You bet your sweet ass I'm going to fuck you, Christine!' he exclaimed, reaching around to grab said ass. "It really is your only hope of...
Porn that gets you off is fun, right? How about porn that gets you off and still makes you laugh? I know, I know, that sounds like a tall fucking order. But when you visit XHamster.com (Funny), you will realize that it isn’t as hard to find!Indeed, porn that’s simultaneously sexy and hilarious does exist! But does it mean that while you cum out of your tiny little penis, you will be laughing out loud? That remains to be seen. If that happens, let me know about it by dropping my ass a line on...
Funny Porn SitesHermione the Shiteater Interview with Hermione Granger taken by Rita Skeeter in Hogwarts, 1st June 1998. Wizarding Wireless broadcast. RITA SKEETER. Good morning, my dear listeners. I'm Rita Skeeter, your favorite journalist, and I'm visiting Hogwarts School today. Make your wizarding wireless louder, because you'll hear the most mind-blowing interview in my career. Of course you know how our glorious and mighty Dark Lord banned all the mudbloods and blood-traitors from attending...
Hermione's New School[Contains fantasy ball-, tit- and cunt-busting, castration (many, some graphic) and big tit themes]HermioneHermione sat on the broken down school bus with her arms folded tightly across her budding breasts.“I bet I finger the new girl first.”“No way - I’ll have her stink on my fingers before home time.”A chill ran down her spine and she re-crossed her arms tighter over her tender young tits. It had been a month since she had been expelled from Hogwarts and a week since her...
Hermione's POV Ronald That name had been floating around in Hermione's head for the past weeks. He was the only thing she could think and dream about. She would spend hours and hours laying awake in bed at night just thinking about how it would be like if she had told him that she loved him all these time. She wasn't stupid. She knew that Ron has feelings for her. But why he hasn't said anything? Why is he so afraid? Is it the war? Is it that he still has feelings for Lavender? Or...
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Hermione had been stayed at the Burrow for the week before term started on her last year at Hogwarts. She was Head Girl this year and as a celebration, Ron and Ginny had invited her to stay with them until school started. Hermione was so excited and proud of herself that she Ginny had thought of a joke of a present to give Hermione for her becoming Head Girl. Hermione was sitting on Ginny's bead reading the 13 page pamphlet Head Boy and Girl called Maintaining Order and Administering Discipline...
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Funny porn has been a lateral staple of pornography since porn producers realized they could package their blooper reels and sell them instead of binning the whole thing. Bloopers are hilarious in porn and in general, so it’s no wonder they started the trend of funny porn. There was also the 90s teenage mind that decided that the funniest thing ever is a chick with a cock, and so dudes would send each other pictures and videos of babes that reveal their cocks, and then they would call each...
Funny Porn Sites“You had better missy.” She jumped over the back of the couch, landed next Hermione, and grabbing her shoulders to look straight in her eyes, “because, I want ALL the details!” Hermione had thought Lavender would be mad, or feel as though she’d been cheated on but it appeared she couldn’t have been more mistaken. The look on her friend’s face was a mixture of impressed and giddy. Lavender wanted girl talk. Hermione had never had a girlfriend she could talk to about boys. I mean they’d...
Submissive whiteboi becomes a sissy faggot pussyboy for his nigger master.It was to be a night of romance. My Nigger lover, Tyrone, gruntedas he pulled his glistening cock from my aching, cum filled asscunt. Hehad just shot a massive load of man slop into my steamy, grippingentrails. Our lovemaking had been a brutal affair, as it always is, which is just the way I like it. I am a subjugated fuck slave, nothing but a sissy faggot sperm receptacle for my dominant nigger lover.Tyrone is the envy...
Daytona Day 1 of 5 I am only going to set this up once so… Master had 5 of his buddies over last Sunday (2/21/16) to watch the Daytona 500. It was in the mid 40’s so my naked ass was outside grilling some food and the guys were just sitting around shooting the shit. For those that don’t know, I am a 24/7 sub/slave for my husband/Master so at home I am always nude. Anyway, eventually the talk turned to the race and who they thought was going to do what. I am and always have been a big Dale Jr....
She even started taking notes in her diary and keeping them locked away in her trunk. She treated some of their sessions like lab experiments noting what worked, what didn't etc. Lavender seemed to like it a bit rougher than Hermione. She enjoyed being pinched, nibbled, scratched, and having Hermione pull on her hair while she ate her pussy. She had even asked Hermione to pretend to be a professor and spank her for doing something wrong. A fantasy Hermione enjoyed a bit more than she’d...
"Oh, fuck, sweetheart!" Hermione yelled in husky tones. "I don't know what I do to deserve you! That's it! Oh, that's it," she groaned, lovingly caressing Ron's ginger hair. "Keep bobbing your head up and down just like that. Tongue fuck my sweet, little, pussy like that. You love the way that dirty, sopping, twat tastes, don't you, honey? Fuck me! Deeper! Deeper, Ron! Shove it in deeper! Oh God, slurp that pussy and make me cream!"They were on a king size bed in the Room of Requirement, the...
The great thing about thongs was that you get a great ass in them, which was the reason why Hermione had begun wearing them during her fourth year, she was after all fifteen and going on sixteen in a matter of months. The bad thing about them was first of all it took time to get used to the feeling of the fabric between your cheeks and second of all you had to make sure they sat correctly or they would be ever so uncomfortable .Hermione stifled a yawn as she flushed the loo and began pulling up...
"Professor, aren't you supposed to show us first?" asked Hermione. "Well, that may be the case, but let's see what you can do." Hermione just shrugged her shoulders and went to the back of the classroom with the other students. They grabbed various books off of the shelves and were back at their tables. She just opened one up and found a sleeping potion that she hadn't made but looked simple enough to make. All was required was a bit of catnip, alcohol and some other ingredients. She...
Hermione arrived at Sydney’s Home and sat down in the den to have tea with her surrogate mum. Halfway through high tea, Sydney decided to broach the subject of Hermione’s visit. “The choice is quite simply yours. I can tell you that in my opinion from the bashful way you found the courage to voice your need for a ‘panties down’ or as those across the pond say, knickers’ for an authentic proper schoolgirl caning.” “I even brought the bottle-green knickers you requested.” Hermione spoke back...
????????????????????????? Persephone in Winter??????????????????????????? by Night Writer ??????????????????????????????? Prologue Elyse waited patiently by the open trunk of the car as the boy placedthe last bag of groceries inside. She found herself smiling, for noparticular reason.? The sun was warm on her face, and a slight breezeplayed with her hair, tickling her cheek, teasing her in and out of herdaydream. The soft knit of the light sweater fell away from the firm swell of...