Karma Part 1-6 free porn video

Karma Part 1 The Voice said, "You have been a pitiful excuse for a person your entire life. You have tormented those that loved you and manipulated others to do you bidding. You have watched the suffering of others and profited off of their misery. You are unfit to enter these gates. There is no excuse that you can offer that will change our view of you. Are you prepared for our judgment?" After a verbal beating like that what else could I say but "Yes." I mean they were pretty much right on. I was a shit head in life and probably deserved to burn in hell. But just to show that when you die you don't necessarily change and become all gracious and accommodating, I was trying like hell to figure out a way to come out ahead on this one. It just wasn't happening. The Voice boomed again. "You are irredeemable. Even now you seek to manipulate these events." OUCH! Got me again. "You are going to be sent back." Really? How cool is that? "You are condemned to live..." Ya know, in retrospect I probably should have paid a little more attention to what the Voice was saying but I was too busy dancing. I wasn't going to hell. I was going to live. What more did I need to know? Once again crap had turned to cream and in my eyes I was all set. Then the pain started. My chest was suddenly on fire and I was falling. I know its clich? but it happened. Next thing I know I'm laying on my back in the street with some guy hovering over me. He says to someone I can't see, "I think we've got her back." "HER????? Her who?" I thought to myself. I kinda moved my head a little to see who they were talking about and I catch my reflection in a puddle next to me. "Aw shit!" is all I can think when I see it. Then everything faded to blackness. Sunshine, blessed sunshine, has there ever been anything as beautiful? It was shinin' right on my face and it felt great. Especially after the whopper nightmare I had last night. In my dream Mandy (my ex wife) caught me takin a little loan from her purse and after accusing me (of all people) of trying to steal her money she hit me with something hard (a bat I think) and I fell over the railing on her porch. Three friggen stories I fell and landed in the street. Man I'm glad it was just a dream. I tried to raise my arms to stretch but I couldn't move. "Weird" I thought to myself. I opened my eyes to see what the problem was. I fuzzily looked around the room. It looked like a hospital room. I was a little (Okay a lot) out of it so it didn't occur to me that it actually was hospital room. "Where the hell am I?" I wondered out loud. At least I think it was me talking but it sure didn't sound like me. As my vision cleared I noticed something was on my chest. At fist I couldn't figure out what it was. It felt kinda heavy but not enough to hold me down. I kept staring trying to figure it out when all of a sudden it came to me. "I've GOT FRIGGEN BOOBS!!! Where the hell did I get boobs?" I yelled. "And what the hell happened to my voice." Then it all came flooding back to me. It wasn't a dream. "That son of a..." I started to say when a nurse (and a damn fine looking one I might add) came bursting into the room. "Honey are you alright?" she asked. "We heard you yelling all the way down the hall. We didn't even know you were awake. The doctor will be so pleased. We were starting to think you weren't ever going to wake up." (Never gonna wake up?) "How long have I been here?" I asked not wanting to hear the answer. "You've been unconscious since they brought you up from surgery a week ago." she answered. "Surgery? A week? I'm almost afraid to ask, but what did I need surgery for?" I grimaced in anticipation of her answer. She looked at me with a sad kind of sympathy that really got me worried. "Look," she said "I need to get a hold of Dr. Roy and tell him you're awake. When he gets here, he'll explain everything. Right now I would like to know your name." Oh shit! My name? How the hell was I supposed to know? I desperately tried to come up with something. Luckily she saw me struggling and said, "It's okay honey it'll come back to you. A lot of times with head trauma it can take a while for the memory to come back." Head trauma? Boobs? And I assume all the other associated parts too. Man the Voice really stuck it to me. I was screwed. Worst of all I had no idea what the Voice wanted me to do now that I was here. Yep screwed! Maybe I was in Hell after all. "By the way," she added on her way out the door "my name is Donna." Some time later (Ever notice how time drags in the hospital?) Donna and that Dr. Roy came into my room. Dr Roy said, "Hello miss (miss? ARRG!) My name is Dr Thaddeus Roy." Dr Roy was a tall (actually VERY tall) black man with a short beard and a little grey around the temples. He looked to be about 50 years old. "You may call me Thad if you wish; I'm not real big on titles and sir names." Thad? What is this guy nuts? By the way how old does this guy think I am? I could only muster a weak, "Nice to meet you Thad." (ARRRGGG!) "Donna," he said pointing to her like I'd never met her before "says you can't remember your name. Is there anything you do remember about who you are? "HMMMM let's see" I thought to myself, what do I remember? "Well my name is (or is that was?) Jake Bryant. I'm 42 years old and I died last week. While I was dead I apparently was barked at by God and sent back to earth as a girl. Think he'll buy that answer? Yeah me neither." I looked at him (trying to look sincere) and said, "No doctor I can't seem to remember anything before I woke up here today. By the way, where is here and what exactly happened to me?" (Seemed like a good couple of questions if ya ask me.) He looked at me for what seemed like hours, finally he said, "Let's see in order you are at Massachusetts General Hospital in Boston. (Good at least the Voice left me in familiar territory.) You were brought in eight days ago after being found laying on Williams St. in Dorchester. When you were found you were not breathing and had no pulse. When the ambulance arrived you were given CPR and other life saving measures and eventually revived." (Wow guess I really was dead. As if I wasn't sure before.) "After that you were transported here. It was determined upon your arrival that you had the following injuries: broken left leg, six cracked ribs, a severely lacerated spleen, broken right wrist, two crushed disks in your back and blunt force trauma to your head." (Damn that Bitch did hit me with a bat!) "We operated on what we could. We removed your spleen, set the bones in your leg and arm, taped up your ribs and drained blood from inside your skull to relive pressure on your brain. Your back is going to require multiple surgeries without which you'll never walk again. But with a little luck you should recover nicely. To be honest, my dear, you're very lucky to be alive today." I just looked at him in astonishment. "Was there anything left to break?" I wondered to myself. He looked down at me with genuine sympathy. He went on "To me it looks like you were either hit by a car going very fast or you fell out of a tall building at least 3 stories." (Bingo!! Mandy lived on the third floor!) "Now what we need from you is for you to just relax and let yourself heal. With you being awake, I'll have Donna here get you a television to help you pass the time. And you'll need it because you're going to be here for quite some time. I'd say at least three more months." (Three months! Man I knew the Voice was pissed at me but come on I wasn't that bad before. Well, okay I was.) "The last couple of things I'd like for you to do is, first every day try to remember something about your life before last Wednesday. Second I'd like you to meet with some one from the local news paper. If you agree I'd like to put your picture in the paper to see if someone recognizes you." "You mean something like do you know this girl?" (Again ARRRGGG!) I asked. "No nothing like that just your picture with some kind of caption under it. No mention of you being here or having no memory. Christ," He went on, "that would bring out every nut job in the city. My thoughts are if someone is looking for you and sees you in the paper they'll call the paper and then be directed to us." "Yep he's a smart one." I thought. Then the light bulb came on and I said, "Thad, I have no idea what I look like. Could I have a mirror please?" "Of course." he said "Donna could you grab one from some where please?" Donna left the room for about 10 seconds and then returned with one. "Now remember," Thad said "your pretty bruised up so don't be too shocked at your appearance." He handed me the mirror. I took it from him and held it down for a moment while I gathered my courage. Finally I let out a deep breath and looked into it. When I saw my reflection my jaw hit the floor. I couldn't believe what I saw. I thought I'd seem a ghost. The Voice truly had a perverse sense of humor. Thad and Donna looked at me with concern. When I could finally pull my eyes from my reflection I said in a very small voice, "I know who I am. My name is Amanda Bry... err (OOPPSS! Almost forgot we were divorced.) David, but my friends call me Mandy." Now let me explain what a friggen disaster this is. First off Mandy is 15 years my junior making her (Or is it me? Man I'm getting a Popsicle headache from this) 28. She's quite the looker too, 5 foot 6 inches long darkish red hair, great legs, hell of a set of knockers, green eyes. (Getting hot and bothered just thinking about it. Hot and bothered? Yea right. I've got nothing to get hot with! This just keeps on getting better and better!) When I first met her she was eighteen and the sweetest thing you'd ever meet. That was until I got to her. What can I say; I was a total asshole to her. I cheated on her, beat her occasionally. (Well maybe more than occasionally. What? I told ya at the beginning of this tale I was a shit head. If I wasn't do ya think that I'd be in this position?) And generally took every opportunity to make her feel bad as I could. (I know, I know. I can hear your thoughts. Enough already!) The worst thing was is I think, for a while anyhow, that she really did love me. (Sad huh?) But eventually, like every other person in my life (Sad music please) she saw me for what I was and left me. The only thing is that she kept letting me come back around. Not that it was romantic or anything but she just never seemed to learn, no matter what she did I was always gonna take advantage of her. That is until the night she pushed me off of her porch. On top of all this I told these people I was her and I have no idea if she's still around. (This could get messy.) Thad and Donna looked at me astonished. "I've never seen anything like this before." Thad was saying. "By just looking in the mirror you now remember your name? How is that possible? (Shit I knew that one was coming.) Do you remember anything else about your life?" I looked at him sheepishly. "I have no idea how it made me remember but it did." I said a little bit indignantly. They both looked at me skeptically. "It's okay honey." Donna said. "Do you remember anything else? Anything at all?" I thought long and hard over that one. (Trying to make it look like I was straining to remember something.) Finally I said, "No not really." They both gave me a disbelieving looks. (This was starting to go very badly.) I was desperate to get them to leave me alone so I could figure out my next move. So lamely I said, "Ya know I'm kinda tired. Do you think we could discuss this more later?" Thad shook his head, "I guess we could, but I'll have to be honest with you and tell you that I'm having a hard time believing what you are telling us." (Yeah like the truth is so much more believable.) I shrugged as best as I could and said, "I'm sorry to hear that Doc. Do you always interrogate your patients the moment they come to?" His face reddened with (I hope) embarrassment and then he walked out of the room. Donna remained. I looked over at her. (Man she is really HOT!!! Black hair, blue eyes, nice tits, Ahhh if I was still a man... Once again ARRRGGGG!) "So are you gonna call me a liar too?" I asked trying to sound innocent. "Well..." she began "it's not that he and I think you're lying, it's just amnesiacs don't usually remember their names after just a quick glance in the mirror." I grimaced "So," she continued "you can see where his suspicions come from. If you do know more and don't want to tell us, that's your choice. But don't treat us like we're stupid. You're not that good of an actress you know." (OUCH! That stung.) With that said she left. Ya know one of these days I'm gonna write a book (another book smart ass.) called how to win friends and influence people. It'll be full of sound and sage advice on how to live a happier life. Come to think of it one line will say it all. The line will be, "Don't act like I do." (What do ya think? Got something there?) For the rest of the day neither Donna nor Thad came back. Other nurses came in and checked on me, but those two stayed away. The next morning I woke up to find Thad and some other doctor in my room talking over my medical chart. I just lay there tying to hear what they were saying but they were too quiet. After a couple of minutes they both noticed I was awake. "Good morning Amanda." Thad began, "This is Dr. Gold he's the surgeon that'll be doing your back surgery." "Hello." I responded coldly. "Have we had anymore revelations since yesterday?" Thad asked in voice dripping with sarcasm. (What is it with this guy?) I tried to turn to look straight at him. (PAIN!!!) I said to him, "What is your problem? Yesterday you were so nice to me until I remembered my name. Since then you've been nothing short of an asshole." He looked pissed. Dr. Gold for his part just stood there looking very uncomfortable. I waited for a reply while Thad fumed. "Miss David," he finally said, "I am not here to get into arguments with my patients. What am here for is to help them return to health. By your refusal to give us even the most basic information about yourself; you hinder my ability to help you. So before you accuse me of some other kind of personal agenda, I'll take my leave. Dr Gold, I'll see you at the nurses station when your finished here." he said as he stormed out the door. (I am just such the people person. Everybody just loves me.) Dr Gold looked like someone snuck him a lemon. (Let's how badly I can mess this encounter up.) Finally I said. "So you're going to fix my back huh?" He hesitated and said, "Yes... yes I am." He then got into the particulars of what he was going to be doing and how long the operation should take. I asked him about how long it would be until I recovered afterward and he told me if everything went well, about a month and a half. Then they could do the second one. (Wonderful!) I'll have to admit the whole time he was talking to me, I felt a little uncomfortable. It wasn't what he was saying as much as the way he kept looking me over. I know Mandy's a hot little number, but give me a break will ya. So any how he finally finished and said he'd be by tomorrow morning before the surgery. (Great, I'm so looking forward to that.) The rest of the day was pretty quiet. Donna came in a couple of times to check out how I was doing. I tried to talk with her but she wasn't really into it. Other nurses came in too and we spoke minimally. Also I got a TV so at least I had something to help pass the time. The following day I had my first back surgery. Talk about pain!! I know Thad says his problem is strictly professional but I think he may have cut back on my pain meds a little just to stick it to me. It went well according to Dr. Gold. (Man that guy makes my skin crawl.) He talks to you professionally enough, but his eyes wandered all over me while he did it. I've got tubes connected to me everywhere and I've got casts on my arm and my leg. Yet still he looks. What would it be like if I was in a bikini? (A bikini? What am I thinking!!!! ARRRGGGG!) I tried to discuss this with Jenny, another one of the nurses, but she said it was all in my head. (Great patient care here huh? Nice to see they listen so well. Then again I've probably been black balled anyhow.) A few days later Dr. Roy came into my room for my daily (interrogation) progress report. For a change he had a smile on his face. Doing my best Bugs Bunny imitation I said, "What's up doc?" He looked at me like the cat that just ate the canary. "I have some news for you." he began "I got a call from the Boston police this morning. (Cops??? This can't be good!) They asked the hospital's director of admissions if we had a patient here named Amanda David. The director looked you up and transferred them to me. I told them that you were in fact still here." I started to squirm a little and the bastard noticed that made him smile even more. "Apparently someone has been looking for you since that night you arrived here." "Oh yeah? Who would that be?" I asked trying to sound nonchalant. "They wouldn't get into it with me." he said with disappointment in his voice. "But they will be here this after noon to talk to you." (GRREEAATTT!!!) A little after two in the afternoon my wait came to end as Dr. Roy and two detectives from the BPD entered my room. "Miss David?" the small Hispanic one began "My name is Detective Victor Ramos and this is my partner Detective Thomas Carter. We work in the missing persons division of the Boston police department. About three weeks ago we received a report from a Mrs. Rita David. (OH NO! Not her... err my? Mother!!!!) Saying she had not heard from you in several days and when she went to your apartment, the place was a wreck." I tried to look confused. "I'm sorry who did you say was looking for me?" "Excuse me detectives." Dr. Roy interrupted "Miss David here claims to have no memory of anything before her arrival here." (Claims??? You are such an asshole.) They both looked at me suspiciously. "Detectives," I began "is there any way we can do this without him here? The good doctor has some issues with me and frankly our conversation is none of his business." Dr. Roy shot me a dirty look. Carter, a rather striking looking man with blonde hair, answered, "I can't see why he needs to be here. Do you have any use for him being here Vic?" Ramos looked a little strained and turned to the doctor, "Could you excuse us please Doc?" he asked. Dr. Roy looked furious as I waved good-bye to him as he left. (Good riddance.) "So where were we?" I asked the detectives. "Um... yes Mrs. David.... Apparently she is your mother and she's very concerned about where you've been, so she called us. She gave us a picture of you." he reached into his coat pocket and produced a picture of Mandy. Looking at the picture and comparing me to it he said, "What do you think Tom?" "Yep I'd say its her." was the reply. "Okay now what happens?" I asked. "Now we'll get in touch with your family and tell them that we've located you. Unless there's some reason you don't want us to?" Ramos inquired. I thought for a moment. "Yes. I suppose you should tell them. Perhaps seeing them will help with my memory." (What else could I do? I gotta have some place to go when I get outta here. I know Mandy's family well enough to pull it off, I hope. Anything I mess up on I can chalk up to my head injury. Besides they're rich.) "Okay, then I guess we can contact them as soon as we talk to the doc and make sure it's not a problem with him." "Why do I need his permission for you to contact my family?" I asked indignantly. "I've already tried to explain that he has issues with me and I don't need him causing me anymore problems." "Can I ask what his problem is?" Carter asked. "When I saw my reflection for the first time after I woke up from my first surgery, I remembered my name. Nothing else has come back to me, but jerk off out there thinks I'm holding out on him." "Ahhh." was all they would say. I looked at the trying to figure out if they bought it but I couldn't tell. "Well be that as it may we still need to find out if you can have visitors before we contact your family." Ramos said. (I just can't seem to catch a break here.) "Fine!" I whined. (My god, now I'm starting to act like her, whining and everything. I gotta get outta this body. I think the estrogen is starting to get to me.) "Well I'd say if the doc okays it you should count on hearing form your mother within a couple of hours." Carter said on his way out the door. (Just wonderful.) True to their word the cops called Mandy's mother as soon as they got out the hospital door. Within fifteen minutes of the leaving the phone next to my bed rang for the first time since I woke up here. As soon as it rang I knew who it was. With tremendous trepidation I picked it up and said, "Hello?" "Oh my God!!! Mandy I'm so glad to hear your voice. I was so worried. I thought that no good ex-husband of yours had finally killed you. How many times have I told you to stay away from him? Well? What do you have to say for yourself? I was sooo worried!! I'm so glad you're okay. Your father and I are heading out the door right now to come see you. We love you so much! We're so glad the police found you. My poor baby girl. We'll be there as soon as we can. I love you my baby. Bye." (Jesus! What have I gotten myself into now? Maybe if I ask nicely Doc Roy will euthanize me before she gets here. Naaa the bastard wouldn't do it. He'd want to watch me suffer.) So surprisingly enough about a half an hour later I had visitors. Rita, a short matronly woman with dyed brown hair, burst into my room and beelined it right for my bed. Lucky for me Jenny was in the room and stopped her before she could get me into a bear hug. "Mr. and Mrs. David?" Jenny asked. "My name is Jenny Lingstrom I'm one of the nurses that have been taking care of your daughter while she's been here." Rita nodded at her in passing and tried to push past her to get to me. Jenny asserted her self and held Rita back. "Mrs. David, I understand you've missed you daughter but she just had back surgery two days ago so you need to be careful with her." Rita looked mortified. "I'm sorry," she said, "I had no idea." Swallowing hard I said "Mom? Dad?" Before another word could be said, Dr Roy entered. (Here it comes.) "Hello my name is Dr Roy. I'm the doctor in charge of Amanda's care." He said with a big smile on his face. To Rita he said, "You must be Amanda's mother. I can see where she gets her looks from." (AKKKK! I'm gonna puke.) Extending his hand out towards Dr. Roy, dad (I guess) said, "Pleased to meet you doctor I'm Paul David and this is my wife Rita. I'd like to take the time to thank you for the care you've given our daughter while she's been here. However I'd like to know why if you knew my daughter was here, you made no effort to contact us?" Dr. Roy looked at me with a delighted grin. He then said, "I'm sorry for the obvious distress the two of you have been under since Amanda disappeared. But we had no way of contacting you because Amanda here was unable to tell us anything about you." They both looked at him questioningly. He continued, "You see Amanda here claims to have no memory of anything before she woke up here." "Oh my baby! My poor poor baby! She can't remember anything." Rita cried looking at me. I just kinda shrugged. "I'm sor..." I tried to say before Thad interrupted me. "It's my opinion." Thad interrupted "Mr. and Mrs. David that your daughter has no memory problems. I believe that she simply didn't want to be found." (Ya know when I get better I'm gonna find this guy outside of this place and give him a swift kick in the nuts.) "What do you mean she didn't want to be found?" Rita countered, "Are you telling me you don't believe she has amnesia? Are you accusing my daughter of consciously misleading you? What proof do you have that she can remember? Hmm? I'm waiting Doctor." "Well madam," Roy began "You see..." "Oh just save it!" Rita screamed. "If my precious baby says she can't remember anything from before she got here, I for one believe her. Further more, I blame you for her memory loss. If you had been taking better care of her, her memory would probably have returned by now!" (Go Mom!!!) Thad stared at her with his mouth hanging open. "Paul are you going to let him talk that way about our daughter?" Rita asked looking at him sternly. "Certainly not dear." Paul replied. "Doctor I think you should wait outside while we talk to our daughter. But don't run away. I know the director of staffing at this hospital and when my wife and I are finished here, you and I will be having a conversation with him about your behavior here." (I swear that I actually heard Thad's sphincter pucker at that one.) "Sir I'm sure that's not..." Thad tried to say. "SAVE IT!" Paul hollered. "Just leave, doctor!" Looking miserable Thad slinked out of the room. In the corner, having watched the entire exchange, Jenny was having a hard time containing her glee. My eyes happened on her and she mouthed to me, "He's such a pompous ass!" I had to concentrate hard not to burst into laughter. After Thad left Rita turned to me and said, "OH my poor baby. How are you feeling? Is it true you can't remember anything? Don't worry we'll get you out of here as soon as your able to be moved. You won't have to worry about that poor excuse for a doctor." "For Christ sakes woman will you let her speak." Paul said impatiently. "How dare you speak to me in that tone?" Rita shrieked. "Who do you think you are to speak to me like that?" (Some one just shoot me!! Please?) Jenny interrupted, "Look folks all this commotion isn't doing Mandy any good. So if you can't calm down you're going to have to leave." Rita opened her mouth to reply but Jenny cut her off. "Lady," she said sternly "don't make me call security." Rita glared at her. Jenny returned her gaze unwaveringly. Finally Rita looked away. (You go girl!) Jenny with a satisfied look on her face said to me, "I'll be right outside. Just hit the call button if you need me." "Thank you. I will." I replied. Rita was giving me the hairy eyeball. "What does she mean, if you need help? Who could possibly help you more than us?" Before she could finish getting revved up for another tirade, I said "It's okay, she was just doing her job." Paul got down next to me and said, "Mandy honey, we were so worried about you. We really did think that Jake had done something terrible to you." Playing up my (supposed) lack of memory I asked "Jake?" "He's your good for nothing, low life, (Hey!) ex-husband dear. You really don't remember anything?" Rita said. "Sometimes, just as I'm waking up I feel like I'm on the verge of remembering everything. But then it fades before I can get a handle on it. It's very frustrating!!" (Am I good or am I good? Donna was wrong I am a good actor... err... actress. What ever!) "My poor darling, don't worry we'll get you the very best help available. Won't we Paul." Rita stated. "Of course we will. First though, we need to get her on her feet and out of here." He thought for a moment. "Well if you two will excuse me for a little while, I think it's time I go and have a chat with Carl Rogers." (Aw no please don't leave me alone with this woman.) "Who?" I asked. "The hospital director dear." Rita answered. "Don't you remember how you went out with his nephew last summer? Oops! I guess you wouldn't at the moment would you? You two made the cutest couple. And he was so handsome. Not to mention that he's studying to be a doctor. You know now that you're divorced from that no good Jake, you really need to think about your future. You're so beautiful but you're not getting any younger you know. You need to think about settling down with a real man soon. " (Please God just take me!!! I've learned my lesson! I swear I'll behave from now on! Please have mercy on me!) "Maybe give your father and me a couple of grandchildren." (Grandchildren? AHHH... NO!) "You know it's been so long since we've had little ones running around the house." (Does this woman ever come up for air?) "I think once you're out of here and feeling up to it we'll have to have a party in your honor. We'll invite all the nice single young men we know. Yes that's what we'll do. I'll be right back dear. I need to go find your father and let him know about our plans. He'll be so excited. Oh we have so much planning to do. Well stay put dear, I'll be right back." (Stay put? I just had back surgery. Where am I supposed to go?) I called Jenny as soon as she left. "Could you do me a favor?" I asked. "Let me guess," Jenny inquired "had enough company for one day?" "Yeah. I think I'm on over load. Can that really be my mother?" I asked. (Nice one huh?) "Well if it is, you might want to take your time recovering and wait it out here." she answered. "Let's see... stay here and deal with Dr. Roy's shit or go home and live with her. Not much of a choice is it?" I asked distressed. "Can't say I'm jealous of you or anything. That's for sure." Jenny giggled. We both laughed. Outside we heard a commotion in the hallway signaling the return of Rita. I looked over at the door worriedly. "Don't worry Mand; I'll take care of her. You just relax and try to get some rest." Jenny reassured. "Thanks Jen. I owe you one." I replied. "Don't even worry yourself about it; it's my job to see to my patients needs. Besides, it'll be fun putting the old wind bag in her place." Jenny laughed as she walked out the door. A few moments later I heard the muffled sounds of Jenny and Rita arguing outside my door. After a bit Paul seemed to get involved. All three voices grew louder and I started to worry about Jenny's safety. Then suddenly it went quiet. About five minutes later Jenny came back in with a wicked looking grin on her face. Nervously I asked, "What happened out there? It sounded like world war three was going to start in the hallway." "It wasn't that bad especially after your father got involved. We double teamed your mother and finally got her to leave. I'll have to say, she's a stubborn old broad that's for sure. You've certainly got your hands full." Jenny stated. I nodded in agreement and let out a sigh of relief. Jenny scowled at me. "Don't get too excited about them being gone." she said. "I can guarantee you they'll be back as soon as visiting hours start tomorrow." (I'm breathless with anticipation.) And that's the way things went for the next couple of weeks. Rita would come in every day as soon as she was allowed to. She would stay all day long, driving me and the nursing staff crazy. After she would leave for the day, Dr. Roy would come in and check/interrogate me about my memory. I told him that things seemed to be coming back to me a little bit at a time, but that wasn't good enough for him. (He's such a dick head.) Of course after the butt reaming mom and dad gave him, he would only show up when they weren't here. I tell ya, I almost wish the Voice had just condemned me to hell. (Or perhaps it had and I just haven't realized it yet. Naaa if I was in hell it would be warmer.) One day Rita brought my (err...Mandy's) sister Anita with her and I had to listen to them talk about all the family gossip. I tell ya there aint nothing like family gossip to really get you revved up. I'll have to admit, it was nice to see Anita. I always liked that kid. She's three younger than Mandy. Kinda short and pretty fat, but she's just the nicest person. She never has a bad thing to say about anyone, even me. (When I was still Jake, I gave them all plenty of stuff to bad mouth me about.) Finally the day came for my second back surgery. I was pretty excited because this meant that I would be released within a few of weeks. I know it means going to live with Rita but after two months in the hospital I'd had enough. Anywhere has to be better than here. (Man I hope that doesn't fall into the category of Famous Last Words.) But I digress. Dr. Gold was in my room going over the procedure and leering at me (God this guy just makes me feel like I need a shower every time I see him.) when Donna happened to come into the room. Donna caught him touching my, well let's just say it wasn't my back and started freaking out on him. "Dr Gold!!" Donna roared. "Just what do you think your doing putting your hand there? Are you that hard up you have to touch incapacitated female patients there just to get your jollies? What's wrong with you?" Dr. Gold's face burned bright red with embarrassment. "Nurse Sylvia! What are you talking about? I'd never do anything like your suggesting." He replied trying to go on the offensive. Donna moved in between us. I was mortified but I was glad she came in when she did. She looked down at me sympathetically and asked, "Honey are you okay? Did he do anything else to you before I got here?" "No." I answered wanting only to crawl under the bed and die. "What do you mean, did I do anything else? I didn't do anything to start with." Dr. Gold squealed. "Amanda, tell her the truth, nothing happened." I stared at him in disbelief. I couldn't believe the set of balls on this guy. (Not that I could blame him for trying to weasel his way out of this. A few weeks ago I would have been doing the same thing.) "Doctor," I said trying to sound confident "I need you to do this surgery on me. You are the best in the business. However, after you finish, if you ever lay a hand on me again, I will have your medical license and your balls dangling from my cars rear view mirror. And that's before I tell my mother. Do you understand?" He tried to stare me down. I sat there passively waiting for his answer. When he realized he couldn't intimidate me, he shook his head in agreement. "By the way." I said, "I'd like Donna to be in the operating room during my procedure just to make sure no accidents happen to me while I'm under the anesthesia." My God he was pissed. His face was so red it looked like he had sunburn. He wasn't stupid though and knew we had him over a barrel, so he agreed. "Okay good. I'm glad we're in agreement. Now can we get on with this please cause I'd really like to walk again someday. Ya know!" *** At first I thought I'd died again. I was back in front of the Gates but this time instead of a booming voice there was an odd looking man standing there. "Welcome back Amanda." he said to me with a giggle in his voice. I just stared at him for a moment. He was the oddest looking person I'd ever seen. He had to be seven feet tall if he was an inch. He was extremely skinny, probably not more than 150lbs. He had average size arms but exceedingly long hands and fingers. His legs looked like he picked them off a daddy long legs spider and his feet had only three toes. His hair was the brightest red you could imagine, and his long face had a gap toothed smile and his skin was so white it looked like he'd fallen into a bucket of bleach. After taking him all in, I asked, "Am I dead again?" "Nope," he replied, "you can't die until you appease that which condemned you. And I'll have to tell you the One is not very pleased with your progress so far." "I can't die? What do you mean? Who are you? And if I can't die how did I get here?" I asked dumb founded. "Let's see, in no particular order, my name is Alexander. I guess you could say it's my job to monitor your progress and report it to the One." I looked at him quizzically. "It's not like in the movies, I can't interact with you whenever I decide to or anything. As a matter of fact the only reason we can communicate right now is because the anesthesia you're under has put you so close death. Also while you can't die you most certainly can be hurt. So be careful if you get your self maimed, you'll stay maimed for a very long time." "So what does He want from me?" I asked not really wanting to hear the answer. He looked at me and shook his head in disgust. "The One told you when you were sent back how you were to earn your forgiveness. The One also knows you didn't listen to what you were told and has forbidden me from informing you." "How am I supposed to gain my forgiveness then?" I asked trying not sound as scared as I was. "That is something you're going to have to figure out on your own. Never forget, Amanda, this is a punishment, not a field trip in another body. There is a reason you were given that body and when you discover that reason you will be half way to your salvation. Now, however, it is time for you to go back. Don't worry though, we will meet again." With that he and everything else around him faded away. I awoke some time later in the hospital recovery room and for the first time since coming back, I was terrified. Part 2 I had been recovering from my second back surgery for about a week when Dr. Roy introduced me to the most evil woman I'd ever had the displeasure to meet. Her name was Karen Tyler and she was my physical therapist. Karen was twenty five years old and seriously into body building. She had long blonde hair and a beautiful smile but she looked like she could bench press a pick up truck. (Even if I was still a guy, she'd scare the crap out of me.) At first she seemed nice enough but in reality it was her pleasure to torture me until I could take no more. She told me the torture would continue until I left the hospital, so I told her I'd leave that very day. She smiled her evil smile and said, "You have to be able to walk at least as far as the bathroom before you can be released." "Who needs to walk?" I asked. "If you ask me walking is so overrated. Besides look how good I am with the wheel chair. A couple more weeks of practice and I'll be trying out for the pro chair rodeo." I added as I crashed into the far wall. Karen laughed at my intentional joke and said, "You're in a good mood today. I'm glad to see it. You've been acting so depressed since your surgery that we were beginning to think you may need professional help." She was right. I had been depressed. After my encounter with Alexander, I was scared shitless. I'd been trying to figure out what the Voice wanted from me but I had been unable to come up with any answers. It got to the point where I was unable to function in any way for fear of doing something wrong. But last night I decided that if I was alive, I needed to live. So here I was trying to make the best of the situation I was in. Even if it meant being tortured on a daily basis by this spunky devil woman. (I was thinking it was like penance for my former sins. Well probably not but it sounded good to me anyhow.) "Okay miss introspective," Karen said breaking my reverie, "we need to get you out of that chair and over to the pool for your morning walk." (See I'm trying to be good. I didn't even flinch when she called me miss. Okay I flinched but only a little bit.) The pool sessions weren't as bad as the support bars at least in the pool it was nice and cool. I rolled over to the pool and Karen helped me get in. My goal was simply to walk the twenty feet across the pool and back. However my legs, after almost two months of inactivity didn't believe it was so simple. Nope not even a little. They screamed at me even though most of my weight was supported by either the water or the floatation device I had a death grip on. I was grunting and groaning my way across the pool when Rita made her morning appearance. I had asked (begged actually) her not to come during my PT sessions but she still did. And of course when she came, she brought her own unique brand of encouragement with her. There were times Rita drove Karen so crazy I though she wouldn't make it to the end of my session alive. Rita saw me struggling to get across the pool and started right in on Karen. "Don't you think she's had enough for today? Look how pale she is! You know you shouldn't push her so hard. She's had a very traumatic couple of months." Rita rambled. "Mrs. David," Karen answered looking like she was going to strangle her "I have told you repeatedly if you are going to insist on coming to these sessions, you need to keep your comments to yourself." "Who do you think you are to be talking to me that way?" Rita began indignantly. "I'm her mother and I will certainly not keep my comments concerning her well being to myself. So you just back off missy!" "MOTHER!" I hollered, "You apologize to Karen right this second. She's doing her job and doesn't need you making trouble for her. Now I need to finish my session here so you can go wait for me in my room or you can leave and come back in an hour when I'm done. Either way you need to go!" Rita's jaw hit the floor with a thud. At first I thought she was going to jump into the pool and drown me. But in the end she turned and stormed out leaving Karen staring at me in shock. I stared back at her and asked, "What?" Karen replied, "I never thought I'd see the day you'd stand up to her like that. I mean I've seen you get irritated when she pulls her crap, but you never really say anything to her about it." "Well, she is my mother. (Ya know it just kills me to say that.) Or so everybody tells me anyway, so I guess I cut her a little more slack than everybody else because she is just trying to look out for me. She is a pain in the ass though." Karen laughed, "Well, I certainly don't envy you having to go live with her when you get out of here." "Yeah, I get that a lot from everyone around here. The only one that seems happy to see her here is Dr. Roy and that's because he gets his rocks off when he thinks I'm uncomfortable." Karen looked at me questioningly. "I'm not his favorite patient." was all I said. (Talk about an understatement.) "Well how bout we get you out of there before you turn into a prune?" Karen asked. "Yeah, that's probably a good idea. I'm getting pretty tired." I answered. When I got back to my room Rita was waiting for me. (Just what I need.) Before she could start I said, "Mother, I'm sorry if I embarrassed you but right now I'm exhausted and need to sleep." She gave me a look of embarrassment. "There's no need for you to apologize dear. I'm the one that should be apologizing to you and that nice therapist. (Okay where did the real Rita go?) I know I'm something of a nag (her? nag? What ever would possess her to say such a thing?) but it's only because I want to make sure that you're getting the best possible care here." Rita said quietly. "I know Ma. I know." I said tiredly. "I love you, you know and I just want to see you get better so you can get out of here and back home." she said sincerely. "I love you too, Ma," I replied. (What did I just say? Man I must be more tired than I thought.) She came over and gave me a hug. It was actually kind of nice. We both smiled at each other. I think she started to say something else but I didn't hear her. I had fallen a sleep. When I woke up Anita was there. "Good morning sunshine. Glad to see you're finally awake. I was beginning to think you had slipped back into a coma." she said smiling. Slightly disorientated I asked, "What time is it?" "It's a little after 7pm. You've been asleep for hours." Anita replied. "I guess I have." I said dully. "Where is mom?" "She went home to get dinner ready for dad. She was just leaving when I got here. She looked pretty upset, like she'd been crying. (Oh great) Do you have any idea why?" she asked. Sheepishly I said, "We had an argument while I was down at physical therapy. She was really aggravating Karen, my therapist, and I got mad at her and told her to leave." "You did what?" Anita almost yelled. "How could you do that to her? You know she can't help the way she is." Now I was getting annoyed. "Do I?" I asked harshly. "The last time I checked I still didn't have much in the way of a memory. So how would I know? Hmm?" (Okay it was a low blow. What can I say? I still suck sometimes.) Anita looked mortified. "I didn't mean to get upset with you." she said, "But you being here has mom really upset. (Like it's a picnic for me.) When you were missing for those weeks, she cried every day. And when you turned up here, alive she got down on her knees and thanked God. All she seems to do is fret over your condition. So how about cutting her some slack?" (Wow as if I didn't feel shitty enough. This girl really knows how to lay on the guilt.) Wondering if I looked as embarrassed, about my behavior, as I felt and desperately wanting to change the subject I said, "So how are things with you?" She was thoughtfully silent for a moment and then apparently deciding not to peruse it any longer she said, "Things are good. Jack says hello and hopes you'll be out soon." "Jack?" I asked. (This time I wasn't pretending.) "Jack's my husband," Anita answered, "and I have a 3 year old son named Charlie. Who, by the way says he misses his aunty Manda and also hopes you'll get better soon." She promptly produces a menagerie of pictures. Jack is a handsome guy (YUCK!! Did I just refer to a man as handsome??? I really got issues.) with short sandy color hair. Charlie was an absolute cutie pie (Cutie Pie? UGGG) with his brown hair and freckles. "A nephew and a brother in law." I said thoughtfully, wondering why she'd never mentioned them before now. "Nita, are there any other family members I need to know about? I don't have any kids or anything, do I?" Her face got serious for a minute. "No." she whispered. "You don't have any kids." "Is there something wrong?" I asked. The look on her face had me really concerned. "No, it does just... aw forget it; it's not important right now." I was going to say something else when she quickly changed the subject on me. The look on her face said she didn't want to get into whatever it was, so I let it go. "Anyhow that covers the immediate family. All the aunts, uncles and cousins will be there for you to meet again when you get out of here. You know mom's planning a party for you once you're up to it, don't you?" (Just what I want a friggen family reunion. GREAT! Just great.) "She said something about it the first day she came here but since she hadn't brought it up again, I'd hoped she'd forgotten." I said hopefully. Anita laughed, "Yeah like that's gonna happen. You know once mom sets her mind to something, there's not turning her back." I smiled woefully, "I guess you're right." After that we made small talk for a while more and then we said our good byes and Anita left for home. As I had mentioned before I had always liked Anita when I was married to Mandy and after her visit my opinion of her had grown even better. I couldn't ask for a better sister. *** Today was certainly a day to remember. Yup gonna have to put this one in my diary, if I ever start one. Saturday April 9, 2005 was the day that for the first time since my incarceration here (2 months and 6 days worth) I was able to go to the bathroom by myself! I'll have to say that after a small bit of confusion (my plumbing change left me standing there momentarily with nothing to hold on to) everything came out fine! *** Jenny and I were out in the hall doing my twice daily trek to the nurses' station. On top of my daily physical therapy sessions Karen had told me walking around the halls would help get me out of here sooner. So every day I walked with one of the nurses for support. "So I hear we might be loosing you soon." Jenny stated. "Yep that's the rumor." I replied. "Another week or so if things continue to go well." "You must be excited." she said. "I am. I can't wait to go out side again. Spring is coming on, the weather is getting warmer and I can't wait to feel the sun on my face again. It's amazing the little things you miss when you're stuck inside for so long." was my reply. "When I'm ready, Karen said that we go work out at her gym together." I needed to work out too. All these months of inactivity had left my body a little wasted. Jenny smiled at that thought and said, "I can picture that. She'll have you looking butch in no time." "Butch? Me? I think I'm a little to slight of build to look butch." I bristled. "Nah you'd look cute all muscular and buff." she teased. I know she was kidding but surprisingly she was starting to piss me off with this. I decided to just laugh it off though. Just then Paul came up from behind us and put his hand on my shoulder. (Scaring the crap out of me.) I nearly jumped through the roof, but when I saw the big smile on his face, I couldn't get mad. "Daddy!" I yelled. (Daddy? What's with that?) "What brings you here at this time of day?" "Hi princess." He said. (Princess? Oh God! Someone help me.) "Just came to see how my girl was today." I scowled in mock consternation, "Dad I'm a little old to be called princess ya know." Ignoring me he turned to Jenny and asked, "Would you mind if I took over and finished Mandy's walk with her?" "No sir. That wouldn't be a problem at all. Just be aware, sometimes she gets tired before she makes it all the way back. If that happens just call one of us and we'll bring her a wheel chair." I stuck my tongue out at her as she walked away. Once we got back to my room I asked, "Is mom with you?" "No," he answered. "I wanted to come see you alone." (Uh Oh!) "Okay, so what's up?" I inquired. (I'm not sure I want to hear this.) "I was at your apartment the other day cleaning things out. And I ran into your landlady Priscilla and she told me some interesting things about the night you got hurt." (Zoinks!) "Like what?" was all I had the saliva to ask. He looked really upset. "She told me that Jake was at your apartment that night. While it was quiet at first, after a short while she heard the two of you yelling at each other. For the life of me I'll never understand what you see in that good for nothing scumbag." (Don't hold back dude, tell how you really feel. Sheesh!) "Not too long after that she heard a loud thump and what sounded like a man scream. Then she saw someone fall by her window. She said she could have sworn it was Jake that fell (Oh shit!) but when she looked out it was you lying on the street. So it looks like he did this to you too. As if the last time wasn't bad enough." (Last time?) He looked pissed! I was petrified. What should I do? It's not like he'll believe the truth. Before I could decide he said, "I know this must be hard for you to hear, (You can say that again.) but if I ever find that little son of a bitch, I'm gonna kill him!" he growled. "I'm going to talk to the police," he continued "but I wanted to tell you first." He looked drained. "Are you sure that's a good idea?" I asked. "Is Cilla willing to tell them what she told you? What you said sounds terrible and certainly explains a lot but I can't say I remember that night at all. So it's not like I can confirm her story or anything." "Even after all this you still want to defend him?" Paul roared, "First he beats you and causes you to miscarry (Whoa! Miscarriage? What miscarriage?) and then he, at very least causes you fall off of your balcony almost killing you. How can someone so smart be so friggen blind?" I was speechless. After a minute I said very quietly, "Daddy, I'm not defending him. Christ, I don't even remember him. I just don't want you to go to the police and look foolish if no one can back up what you tell them." With tears running down his face he said, "I'm sorry princess. I didn't mean to lay that on you like that. It's just for a moment there you sounded so much like your old self, when it comes to him I just lost it. I'm so sorry." He reached over and hugged me fiercely. Long moments passed before I asked, "Dad, what did you mean, I had a miscarriage? When did that happen?" He couldn't meet my eyes. "I swore to your mother that I wouldn't say anything until you remembered on your own." "Well, I don't think you'll be keeping that promise any more." I answered icily. He stared at the floor and continued, "About six months before your fall you came home and told us that you were pregnant with Sam's baby. (Who's Sam?) Oh you were so happy and your mother and I were so relived that you'd finally moved on from Jake. But a month or so later Jake called you and gave you some line. So of course you went to meet with him. He wanted some money to pay someone or another and you refused." He had to pause for a minute before he could go on. "So he... he beat you. He beat you so bad that you miscarried the baby. You were devastated. You swore to us that day that you'd never have anything to do with that son of a bitch again. Not long after that you broke up with Sam and moved out." I was stunned. Flatly I said, "And then I went and saw him again. I'm so sorry daddy, for everything." He looked miserable. "You have nothing to be sorry for. But you have to promise me that if he ever shows his face again, you'll walk away and call either the police or me." "I promise," was all I could say. Once again he pulled me close and hugged me. "I love you so much, princess. I was so scared when you disappeared. I though we'd lost you for good." "It's okay Daddy." I tried to sooth. "I'm safe and I promise to never see Jake again. Okay? Please stop crying Dad. It'll be okay." After a bit, the emotional storm passed from him. He kissed my forehead. "Are you okay?" he asked. "I'm not sure. I need some time to think." I answered. Understanding my unspoken request he said, "Well, I have to get back to the office. I'll call you later when I get home tonight, to check on you. Also your mother will be by later. If can bring yourself to not tell her about our conversation I'd appreciate it. If you feel you need to talk to her though, I'll certainly understand." He left without another word. I was devastated. I had no idea that Mandy had ever been pregnant. How could I have done that to her? Is it any wonder that they wouldn't let me in up there? For the rest of the day I stayed alone in my room with my thoughts and my guilt. Part 3 "Mandy?" Donna's voice invaded. "Go away!" I said miserably. "Mandy, are you okay? Jenny said that you haven't been out of your room in hours and that you sent your mother away when she came earlier." "Go away!" I repeated. "Talk to me please. Come on what's wrong?" Donna pleaded. I got myself into a seated position and yelled, "GO AWAY! LEAVE ME ALONE! I DON'T WANT TO TALK TO ANYONE!" There were tears streaming down my face. Donna came to the side of my bed and put her hand on my shoulder. "No," she said. "It's my job to look after your health while you're here. That includes your mental health. So I'm not going to leave until you talk to me." "Oh for Christ sakes! Fuck off! There how's that for talking?" I asked bitterly and turned away from her. "Fine you want to be stubborn, I can be stubborn too." She walked out of the room and returned a couple of minutes later with a book. "I'm not going to leave you in here crying all by yourself." she said as she pulled up a chair and sat down. She was really pissing me off now. Trying to reign in my temper, I said, "Please, Donna I'm alright. Really. I just need some time to myself. Okay?" "Look kiddo," she replied "I know our relationship hasn't exactly always been the greatest, especially when you first arrived here and made so much trouble with Dr. Roy, but as time has gone on I've become quite fond of you. When Dr. Gold was messing with you, who stayed in the operating room making sure that he didn't try anything funny?" I gave her no answer. I lay in my bed lost in my guilt. Donna sat and read. The silence seemed to stretch on for hours; the only sound was the turning of her pages. "My father told me I had a miscarriage." I said quietly. She looked up from her book but said nothing. "He told me that my ex-husband beat me, causing it. The guilt is almost too much to bear." I whimpered. She came over to me, pulled me close and said, "Oh honey it's alright. You have nothing to feel guilty about. It was not your fault. He did this to you. You didn't do anything." I know she was trying to comfort me, but in all honesty her words were only making things worse. She held me as I cried. Mandy was one of the best things that ever happened to me and all I ever did was shit all over her. There are no words to describe how awful this is. And the worst part is I completely deserve to feel this way. I moped my way through the next couple of days. I didn't leave my room unless I had to. Karen and Donna were as supportive as they could be. (Apparently Donna had told Karen what was up.) I know their hearts were in the right place but their constant belittling of Jake wasn't exactly making me feel any better. I came to realize that there was no one I could really talk to about this. No one would be able to say anything that would make me feel better, with out me coming clean about who I truly was. That would, of course, be a one way ticket to a nice tight fitting jacket and a lovely padded room. Nope I was going to have to work this one out on my own. I woke up at about 2AM from a whopper of a nightmare. I'd been having one just about every night since my conversation with Paul. I got up to go to the bathroom. As I got out of bed I noticed that I felt wet down there already. "Wonderful. Now I've regressed to bed wetting." I thought to myself. I turned on the light to see how bad it was. At the same time I reached for the nurse call button. After informing the duty nurse (with tremendous embarrassment) I had wet my bed, I pulled back the sheets to the damage. When I looked down I saw blood. "What the hell?" I wondered confused. I looked down at myself and saw more on me. "What the hells going on?" I yelped as the nurse entered the room. I was panicked. All I could think of was I had ripped my stitches on my back or something. "Amanda calm down. What's the matter?" she asked. Pointing at first the bed and then myself, I screamed, "LOOK! I friggen bleeding. I must have torn my stitches. Get the doctor before I bleed to death!" As she started to assess the situation and to chuckle. "What's so damn funny?" I demanded indignantly. "Honey calm down. You didn't rip your stitches and you're not going to bleed to death." She answered still giggling. "What's wrong then? Look at all the blood!" I retorted. "You've started your period." she stated simply. "My what? Period?" For some reason I couldn't make a mental connection. What she was saying made no sense to me. She looked at me like I was some kind of moron. "Yes, dear, your period. You know your menstrual cycle." she said patiently. "Menstrual cycle? Oh my God!" I said with dawning understanding. "Yes, dear. Now why don't you go take a shower and I'll clean up this mess. When I'm done I'll get you...Hmm. Do you prefer tampons or pads?" she inquired. "How the hell would I know?" I asked myself. (I barely know what the difference is.) "I... I'm not sure." I said a bit squeamishly. She studied me for a moment. "I'll just grab you some pads," she said as she shooed me into the shower. After I got out (And may I add that was one of the nastiest things I've ever experienced) my humiliation continued. The nurse handed me a box of pads. I took them and retreated back into the bathroom. I looked the box over but I couldn't find the instructions. I opened the box but no manual fell out of it either. Then I decided to open on of the wrappers figuring maybe if I saw the thing it would be self explanatory. (So much for that idea.) After another couple of minutes the nurse knocked on the door. "Honey are you alright in there." she asked. Swallowing what little pride I had left, I meekly said, "I don't know what to do with this thing." She poked her head in the door and looked at me quizzically. "May I come in?" she asked as she entered the small bathroom. She surveyed the mess I had made and smiled. "I guess your memory problems extend to more areas that we were aware of." With that said she gave me a quick demonstration of how to use the pad. She left while I put on my underwear and finished getting dressed. It took more courage than I thought I could muster to walk out of that bathroom when I was done. Somehow I managed though. She was waiting for me when I came out. "All set?" she asked. "Yeah. I think so. Thank you for your help." I said as I climbed back into my bed. She came over and pulled the covers over me. "Check that again in a couple of hours. If you have any problems changing it just call me." she said merrily. "Thanks." I whispered. As she went out into the hallway, I pulled my pillow over my head and hid. *** It's here! It's here! The day has finally come! Unlike my previous notable day entry this one is legit. I'm going home (Well to Mandy's parents' house anyhow.) today. I am finally going to get out of here! Woo hoo! No more hospital food! No more 3am wakeups to take sleeping pills! No more Dr. Roy! No more people watching me go pee! Ah life is good! Now if I only had some clothes, I'd be all set. About two hours later Rita and Anita (Hey, their names rhyme. I never noticed that before. Think they did that on purpose?) came to get me. "Well you certainly look better today." Anita said. "Well if you'd been stuck here as long as I have, you'd be psyched too." I replied. "I'm just glad to see you smiling. The way you've acting been these past few days, I was beginning to doubt we'd ever see it again." Rita said. "I was actually talking to Dr. Roy about getting you some depression treatment. You know that your mood can affect your ability to heal. So I was really worried whether they'd let you out. But Dr. Roy, isn't he such a nice man? Anyway he said that you'd be fine and that being home would probably bring you out of your funk." (Help me!) "You know Mrs. Wasserman down the street she suffers from depression. Sometimes I see her outside in her robe at all hours of the day. So I was telling..." "Whoa ma." Anita interrupted, "I'm sure Mrs. Wassermann's' depression problems are fascinating but we need to help Mandy get ready to get out of here." Rita continued, "Oh, of course. I'm so sorry honey. You know how I get. I start talking and my mouth just takes off on me. Why just the other day I was talking to your father." "MOM!" Anita and I hollered in unison. She gave us a chastised look and we all burst out laughing. (And it hurts like hell to laugh but I couldn't stop.) After a few minutes we composed ourselves. "So wait till you see what we brought for your trip home." Anita said excitedly as she produced a yellow flowered dress. "Well what do you think?" she asked expectantly." (Oh I don't think you really want me to answer that.) I put on my best fake smile and said, "It's lovely." Looking a bit deflated Anita said to Rita, "See I told you she wouldn't like it." "Well she can't wear her blue jeans so this was the best I could come up with." Rita retorted. (Mandy always was a blue jeans kinda girl. But on those occasions she got dressed up, Woo Whee! She was smokin'! Ah, like I said before... issues! Lots and lots of issues!) I said to the both of them, "It's okay. I do like it. Thank you very much. Can one of you give me a hand here?" (While I can get up on my own, it hurts like a dickens so any time I can get help I take it.) Anita helped me get to my feet and handed me the bag she was carrying. "The rest of your stuff is in there." She said pointing at the bag. "If you need help just holler." I smiled as I shuffled off into the bathroom. After what seemed like an eternity, (Man those bras are tough!) I emerged once again. "Can one of you get the zipper?" I asked. (Why do they have to put them on the back? Can anyone answer me that?) Rita complied. When that was done, I went and took a look in the mirror. I'll have to admit, other than being way to th