Zen And The Art Of Self-Defense Chapter 4 free porn video

Part 2 - Freedom of Movement Chapter 4 - Center of Gravity You know, this really isn't the movies. In today's movies, as I dreamily awake, she would be dressing, saying she has to get to her job. We would couple for a moment as she eventually turns from me, and I would then drift in and out of sleep, savoring all the intimate moments of the past night where we had caressed and pleased each other to no end. Why that scenario? I should think it obvious, who was in what role last night. And then there would be the obligatory fade. So, anyway, in this world, I awake before Jillian which I have trained myself to do. She had mentioned that she had to get going to a number of appointments where she absolutely had to be. At this stage in her career, she had told me, she can't yet be the self-centered diva, making everyone wait for her. "Of course, I don't ever plan on being that person. And if you see that coming, please do stop me," she had said. That's a big order, but at least there are things I can do now to help and one is getting up, making it easier for her leave which of course, is very difficult for me to do. I would have given anything to have remained in bed a little longer, or better yet, spent the day with her enjoying each other as much - and maybe even more - than we had done last night. Such is not to be. I had even set the alarm, which I was able to turn off early to leave her peacefully sleeping next to me, but I'm fully expecting the phone to ring any moment. As I think on all this, and more, she comes into the kitchen where I am midway through preparing breakfast, and smiles at me, "Hmmm, smells so good, and aren't you just the adorable little woman in her kitchen." She is wearing panties and my nightshirt, with slightly tousled hair, and is still just as beautiful. "Be nice," I smile glancing back at her, softly saying, "or I'll put salt in your coffee and burn your dinner." She pouts a little, replying, "How can you say that, when I was so nice to you last night. And if I didn't know better, I was sure I found your g-spot." I murmur contentedly remembering last night as she comes over to me, in a playful tone, "Let's see if I can find it again." I'm facing the counter as I'm preparing her grapefruit and am wearing panties, a bra and a cami, and wig, "Please, I'm trying to work here and put on a decent meal." As she wraps her arms around me, I continue cutting the segments out, whining slightly, "And I'm sure I look just horrid this morning. My hair is a mess, my eyeliner is smudged." "You look ravishing, Chrissy, and if this is what you look like now, I can only imagine what you'll look like soon." Her hands are all over me, my chest, my hips, between my legs. "Stop that!" "Turn around and come here," she says softly as she starts turning me around, which I barely resist. And with her arms around me and mine around her neck and shoulders, we kiss, a passionate involved and tongue exploring kiss, and it feels wonderful. But almost like in a movie, even if it has been more than a minute or two...or more, into our embrace, the house phone rings. Jillian leans back, but with her hand on the back of my head, and says, "Let it ring, sweetie," and tries to pull me back into the embrace. "Uh uh, you know who it is and what she wants, and I'm sure she knows we're both here," I say as we break apart and Jillian starts her pout look again. I answer, "Hello?...Yes...good morning Elizabeth." I glance at Jillian She nods her head. "Yes...yes...yes she is...ok, here she is...bye." I hand the phone to Jillian who has sat down on a stool by the counter bar. "Good morning, Mother (she rolls her eyes at me).....Yes, a wonderful breakfast, coffee, my special blend, grapefruit which Chrissy here has segmented for me, and a half English Muffin, Bays, not Thomas, just like I like...Yes, she is good....I know, I'll be ready in about 15 minutes...Yes, and have Thad accompany me. Tonight, I'll play it by ear. Confirm that appointment today for Chrissy with Dr. Sanjay, and set an appointment in two weeks with Serge and after that with Danny....I know, I know, lots to do today...Thanks I'll tell her." She hands the phone back to me. "Elizabeth said to say thank you for getting me going. And I do too. No rest for the wicked, huh." We laugh at that, as I quietly say, "You're welcome," thrilled that they are appreciating me. I really do want this to work, as I continue, "You've got an appointment in 15 minutes?" "No, but I have to be getting ready back in my room at that time, because they are waiting for me." "Oh," I sigh a little dejectedly. "Chrissy, you were wonderful last night, in bed, both of us getting dressed, letting me work on your makeup, painting your toes, you doing mine. And this morning, getting my breakfast, knowing exactly what I would like. That is so totally what I want in a companion. Now keep working on that and putting it together with your martial arts and you'll be sensational." I sort of get a wry smile, "Thank you. And thank you for putting up with my sadly painful lack of experience.? With that kind of look between concerned and comforting, she quickly replies, ?Oh, no, no, no. Don?t say that at all. You were wonderful in your bedroom, and when we moved? That was so?sensually satisfying for me to show you, teach you all those things that we both found pleasurable.? She certainly knows how to make her partner feel good, even if I can guess the truth ? and accept that she is an actress - but that?s part of why everyone likes her. Though I think she is probably right about the later moments. I hope anyway. The phone call has allowed me to get her breakfast together, the coffee, the muffin and the grapefruit and I serve all on the counter bar, with appropriate tableware and napkin ?There you go, my lady.? ?You?re so sweet. This is really nice. Aren?t you having any?? she gives me a smile before digging in, looking quite content with how it?s all prepared. ?I will when you go, now eat your breakfast. Looks like you have a busy day and you?ll need your strength,? I slide in next to her on the adjacent stool with a glass of juice, which is what I prefer at the moment. ?Ah, another mother, just what I need. Yes, the days get that way. About Dr. Sanjay, sweetie, you listen to what he says and follow it exactly, okay?? ?Yes.? ?Serge is my hairdresser and Danny is a make-up artist. You should be done with Avery?s gym by then and have started on the doctor?s regimen. We?ll take it from there.? ?Okay.? She stops for a moment and looks at me, as her smile fades slightly, ?Are you really sure about this? You know this is what I want, but I want to know that you?re wanting it too. And if you?re not, please let me know, tell me now.? I sigh, but a soft one as I smile, glance down then back into her blue- green eyes, ?I?ve thought a lot about this, last night before falling asleep, this morning as I looked at you sleeping next to me, here in the kitchen. I hope that how I have been since you walked in a few moments ago, reflect my feelings?and desires.? ?Good. I?m so glad. I have a really good feeling about this, I know it will work,? she says as she finishes her meal, with her smile returning and exhaling softly. ?I do, too, but I?m already guessing I?ll have to really focus on my exercising and maintaining my abilities. I know there?s going to be lots of changes and I?ll have to figure out how to handle them, weight distribution, muscle mass and body tone. Probably some I haven?t even thought of. I?ve got to get started on it right now.? ?I?m seeing that sureness again, Chrissy?you do like that name I?m using?? ?Yes, maybe some time later I?ll think about it, but it really works for me now, and for the rest of the staff, too, I?m sure.? ?Good, and like I said, I like how you face up to things.? I just smile with a little blush at that. ?Now I?ve got to get dressed and go. Thank you for this delicious breakfast,? she pauses and looks at me in that way, that I?m learning all too well. ?You?re welcome,? I respond as we touch lips in a quick kiss, and she gets up and heads to the bedroom. I start on cleaning up the dishes, and a moment or two after I hear sounds of a faucet in the bathroom, she?s back, hair brushed, jeans and one of my tanks, looking just as cute. She heads to the door motioning me over. ?Chrissy? Okay to borrow this?? I come over to the door as she has stopped and is looking back at me, pointing to the tank. ?Yes, of course, that looks good on you,? I respond. She continues, ?It was truly wonderful last night, you?re everything I could have hoped for. Thank you for being here for me, and for agreeing. I couldn?t be happier.? ?Thank you for being here for me. Like I said in bed, finally being able to share my feelings and that, my, hidden place is such a relief, such a load off my shoulders, as is finding someone who wants to help me explore it.? She wraps her arms around me again, and we embrace like before. These kisses are like nothing I?ve ever experienced and I don?t want them ever to stop. She does stop and pulls back as she looks at me with a very relaxed smile, ?I want to see how everything goes, I promise I?ll call you later today. Ok, sweetie?? ?I?ve heard that one before. Oh wait, I think I?ve used it once or?..? ?You?re terrible, bye lover,? she says as we break apart and she opens the door. She turns back a moment as she leaves, ?I know you have a class today, make sure you clean up, and remove the polish. They?re expecting a manly man, I?m sure.? ?Oh, I don?t know, maybe they wouldn?t mind a girly-girl?? ?You are terrible!? she says as she gives me a playful slap on my ass, ?Bye!? I stand at the door as she walks across the grounds to the main house, watching her move so easily and purposely. Closing the door, I just lean back against it and let out a big sigh. I?m almost fearful of re- living too much of what all has transpired in the past half day, like if I think too hard, I?ll wake up and it will all have been a dream. But I?ve made the decision, and I know it?s the right one. I can just imagine where it will lead. I take a nice deep soft breath as images flit across my mind. And then I look at the remaining dirty dishes in the kitchen and realize that it?s not a dream, not yet, anyway, and I have things to do and places to be. It?s already closing in on 8 and I have to be at the gym by 10, or actually before so I can warm up. I return to the kitchen and pick up the phone finding the number for Elizabeth on a list, and punch it. I?m thinking I should make sure a ride or something is available. ?Hi, Elizabeth? It?s, uh, Chris?sy.? I glance down at myself and over at a mirror on a side wall. It is me, isn?t it? I sigh, as I?m sure I don?t look like Jillian was saying. Well, maybe a little? Oh, yes, pay attention. ?Oh?okay?great, a car will be ready at 9:15 and will pick me back up at 2 and the doctor will see me at 3. Got that.? ?Yes, you?re welcome, and thank you Elizabeth, you?re a dear.? My, is she efficient. And she thanked me for knowing to call her. Now to get this place looking decent. And I haven?t much time to pick up three rooms, put away these (and a fair amount of other) clothes, get this make-up off, shower, and get going. No rest for the wicked is right! As I pick up and straighten up (and try to put off changing for as long as possible) I do think back to moments from last night, the coupling, how Jillian felt next to me, my lame attempts at pleasing her, until she gently guided me to what really mattered. And then! Going into the other bedroom and her encouraging me to try on some of my outfits. And her actually liking some of them on me, and trying some on herself, and suggesting I toss others. Oh, well. I was surprised when, in a quiet moment, she asked if I would see her doctor the next day to talk about the sex change and transitioning. ?Tomorrow? That seems so quick!? ?I know, but if you?re committed, at least you should start talking to a doctor. And since I have one, a good one by the way, who?s available, why not?? How could I refuse her? But she?s right. There is no sense in postponing something like this. I have committed. And with my agreement, we started a whole new round of exploration. I felt good when she said, ?It?s great you?ve got just a little body hair. Some guys, well, you know. This will be so easy to get rid of, but not yet, of course, because of your classes. We can do a little ?sculpting? though.? And she took a new razor, a little cream, and proceeded to show me. Moments like that, how can one not but feel close to somebody? Once she had me in an outfit she liked, she then got serious and applied make-up, more involved than I had ever managed, combed and styled my wig a little, we shared some wine, she put polish on my toe nails and showed me how to do hers. And we talked a lot, about our hopes and dreams, some of our past. And she started calling me Chrissy, which by now sounds so?normal. It was like, now that I had let her take hold of me from that free fall, she was leading me on a journey where it was all so new and wonderful, where before I could even comprehend what we were doing, we were off in a new direction. And it ended in a coupling where I can barely describe it, because it was the most intense moments of pleasure that I have ever been a part. Where for the first time, I let myself fully go, and could not get enough from her, nor give enough back. Jillian somehow stimulated parts of my body bringing me to new levels of sexual arousal I never knew existed. And perhaps, it was also the newness of experiences where I felt I was so much closer to who I really am, and realizing I was enjoying them for the first time, that added to the moments. That in many ways, these experiences were almost virginal for me, and I?m sure Jillian was aware, which made them so unbelievably thrilling. Suffice it to say, we were both exhausted. We finally fell asleep holding one another, or more truthfully her holding me, and me clinging back. It feels like almost a letdown of sorts after the experiences of last night, to have to get back to a life that seems so routine in comparison. But, I do have the memories as well as the anticipation of a future to fall back on. After working quickly to finish up and get going, I walk over to see Elizabeth about five minutes before my ride. ?Good morning, Elizabeth,? I offer brightly as I enter her office, wondering a little of what she might be thinking. She looks at me and smiles, a very friendly smile, ?Good morning?Chris. A busy day ahead of us, but I saw that Ms. Thomas was in a very good mood this morning, and you seem to be also. And that makes my job all the easier.? ?Oh, okay! Um, about picking me up, better make it around 2:10. I don?t want to keep anyone waiting, and it takes a few minutes to finish up. Will that work?? Her smile changes to her very down to business look as she says, ?I don?t see a problem, thank you for letting me know. Please feel free to adjust the times, within limits, letting me know when you can, so that we can keep things running efficiently.? ?Will do. If I don?t say it later or enough, I still mean it, you are great. Thanks.? She flushes a little and tries to look busy to cover up as she says quietly, ?You?re welcome. Now, I think your ride is about ready, you need to go.? ?Bye, doll.? ?Uh, good-bye,? she barely looks up, but that hint of a smile is there. Aaron is the driver, and I come to the passenger side door and ask if I can sit up front with him, as the seat is empty. I really feel uncomfortable being chauffeured around in these large cars, with only me in back. ?Hey, don?t think we?ve met, my name is Chris,? I say to him trying to be friendly. He looks at me not meanly but not pleasantly either, more like strictly professional. ?Aaron. That?s all right, the back is fine,? he motions me back there. I guess he wants to keep it civil. I won?t complain. Maybe if I get up with Stephan, Thad, and him for a drink, that might make things easier. I get in and get comfortable, while I see if I can figure him out. He?s probably the smallest of the three, still bigger than me, of course. It will be interesting to see how they are in the classes which I have to get going on. I have wondered if they came here to try to break into the business. I suppose like me, they actually have in a way. I?ve seen enough wannabes, that I can figure out a little why they didn?t make it directly to in front of the camera. Thad, Stephan, and now Aaron seem decent enough, but it looks like only Aaron has a little of what I?ve heard is called star quality especially from what I?m seeing now. I think on that for a moment as I sort of extend my glances of him. Gotta hope that later I can meet these guys in a more casual setting and see what they?re really like. We get near to the gym soon enough and Aaron looking in the mirror at me, says, ?I?m letting you out here.? Here being the end of the block. ?Hey, this?ll work. Thanks,? I say as I notice for a second how deeply blue his eyes are. He just murmurs without looking again, and we stop and I get out, and I say, ?Bye,? to minimal response. The car quickly leaves the curb. He certainly looks better than he?s acting, but I suppose everyone?s different. A few people glance in my direction, but I obviously don?t look like Anybody, so I mingle into the crowd and am quickly forgotten. The day is turning cloudy with some threatening sprinkles. It feels sort of odd to be coming to the gym. I mean it?s been just a little over two days, and it?s like there?s this whole new rhythm. I hope nothing inside is changed. I enter and see Avery, and smile slightly, and realize it hasn?t. He sees me and perks up immediately, ?Chris, my man, you?re certainly looking good this morning. I?ve actually missed you the past several days. You keeping out of trouble?? ?As best I can, Avery. And I?ve missed this place a little,? I look around and then at him, ?And you, too.? Noticeably looking even better he asks, ?So, how?s the new job? You working for anyone I might know? You can tell me, I?m good at keeping secrets.? I sigh a little, shaking my head, ?Naw, you know I can?t do that. But, I?m sure you?ll find out soon enough. The only secret in this town is how does anyone keep a secret.? ?Yeah, that?s the truth. So, what are your plans? Am I going to have to find a replacement instructor?? ?Not right away. I?ll finish up the classes, no problem. But you might want to be looking for somebody if you want to keep offering them. I?d like to keep my membership here, and I?ll even pay for it.? ?Chris, Chris, right now, you don?t have to pay for anything. When your current time is up, we can talk about it then. I figured I?d have to find somebody, I was just hoping that you wouldn?t be totally leaving here.? ?Nope, you?re stuck with me for a little while longer. Hey, I?ve got to get ready for my classes. I?ll talk to ya afterwards, okay?? ?Sure, and thanks for wanting to finish up, you don?t know how helpful that is to me.? ?Avery? I can tell you this much. I owe you big time,? I say as I walk into the back leaving him to think about that. I teach the several classes I have that day, chat with Avery in between. I give him some names of possible instructors, and even mention that Kevin is starting to look good enough as an instructor for a beginner?s class. Of course, I am also almost visibly distracted which increases as the day wears on; and thoughts about Jillian and my future tend to want to push everything else out. I am guessing that it does show at times. Kevin comes in as I?m finishing up, and I ask him, as I had been hoping he would be there, ?Hey, you want to hit that new bar in Santa Monica tonight?? ?Sure, sounds good, but I can?t stay out too long, about 8?? I?m pretty sure nothing is going on and figure I can find a way back into the compound, ?Great. Plan on it.? I mention that I?m pulling out of teaching classes, and he understands, and seems pleasantly surprised that I don?t want to lose our friendship. Avery had noticed that I was a little distracted and as I come through to leave, and asks, ?Hey, there, Chris, you ok? Somethin? bothering you, today?? I certainly can?t tell him, got to think of something, ?Oh, you know, when the weather changes, I just get out of sorts.? He looks out a window and nods knowingly, ?Yeah, you do, and I can understand. Hey, thanks again for finishing up these classes, you know how I don?t like having to step in.? ?Hey, it?s ok, you?ve been really great to me, so it?s no problem, though I do feel a little bad about leaving.? ?Chris, my man, you got to do what you got to do. You?ve got an opportunity here, and it may never come again. You?re doing the right thing. Take it and run with it and never look back.? He?s a lot closer to the truth than he realizes. Maybe someday I can come clean and tell him. ?Thanks, Avery. You?re a friend. I?ll be back for the next classes. See ya then,? I look at my watch and it?s almost 2:10. ?Great. See ya .? I leave the gym and head over to my pick up spot, and just as I get there so does the limo. I glance in a window and notice that Stefan is driving, so I ask if I can join him up front, to which he agrees. ?Chris, we?re planning on going to that club down around Malibu tonight, you interested?? Uh, oh, I really don?t want to leave Kevin hanging, but I got to get to know these guys better, too, what do I say? ?That?d be great. Uh, I?ve got this buddy of mine; I was hoping to meet up with him, later. Um, would it be all r?? ?Hey, you both can join us if you want. Does he know about Ms. Thomas?? ?Nope, just that I?m working as a trainer up in the hills and have met some drivers and bodyguards. That?s it.? ?I don?t see a problem.? ?Thanks, Stephan, I appreciate that. I?ll give him a call.? I call Kevin and after a little cajoling, he agrees to meet us there. I give Stephan a little heads up on Kevin, hoping at least he will make him feel included. ?He sounds interesting. Glad he can come.? I glance out the window and notice we?re going a slightly different direction. Stephan catches it and says, ?I?m taking you right to the doc?s office. I?ve been told the appointment?s an hour, so someone ? probably me ? will be back at 4. Any earlier, just call.? ?Oh! Okay, great, thanks.? I wonder how much he knows, how much any of them know. Elizabeth surely has to know. Well, she does, both Jillian and I?ve used ?Chrissy? several times, I don?t think she even blinked. I wonder what they think? No, wait, Stephan practically said the other day they knew what Jillian needed and thought I would do. So did Elizabeth, and they were ALL in agreement. Was I the last to know? No, don?t go there. Now, how do I talk about it? Hey, nice weather, how about those Lakers, I?m getting a sex change. Just doesn?t quite fit here, does it. And tonight, if Kevin shows up, and Stephan and I guess Aaron start asking questions, what do I do? This is getting very complicated. But no time to worry about that as we?re at the doctor?s office. I always have some trepidation, well, maybe fear, about going to doctor?s offices. Getting stuck with needles, and prodded, not exactly my idea of a good time. I think it probably raises my blood pressure a little, too. I go in, do the requisite amount of waiting, and am called into the back. Before I can say anything, I?m put through the gauntlet of an examination ? weight, height, blood pressure, blood sample. A competent assistant takes some history, asks the routine questions and has me get into the gown. Jillian said to do what the doctor says, so I rather meekly acquiesce to this intrusion of privacy. Now that I have the time, I do wonder about how quickly this is actually happening. How did Jillian get me in here so fast? Oh, that?s right, I heard her say to Elizabeth something about confirming the appointment. Still, I wonder about it all. Finally, the doctor enters the room. ?Good afternoon. I?m Dr. Sanjay. So, Chris is it? Nice to meet you.? ?Yes, good afternoon.? He glances through the paperwork that the assistant had filled out, ?Everything looks good. Let?s check some more things.? ?Okay.? He takes his stethoscope and listens to parts of my body having me breathe. He checks for various physical issues including those rather personal ones males are subject to, finally saying, ?You appear in very good health. That?s often a good start.? ?My family?s always been pretty healthy. Though, my dad died in an accident.? ?I?m sorry to hear that,? he looks up at me, continuing, ?Now, I?ve been told why you?re here, but I?d like to hear it from you, if you?re ready to tell.? I take a breath. This is it, I suppose, the commitment. Except I wasn?t expecting this, so I?ll have to wing it. Pretty smart of him actually. ?I guess I?ve always had this feeling that I?m the wrong sex, well, gender, on the outside. I?ve known it since around age 4 or so. And it?s never left, never changed, never wavered. Only how I have suppressed it?or tried to, which has never come close to working. I?ve now decided that it?s time to get my gender corrected, male to female. I want to get started.? He thinks about it for a moment, and then asks, ?Have you been to see a therapist?? ?No, I?ve considered it, but what I have read and learned about myself, I?m quite certain of what?s happening. I just was only unsure about when I was wanting to actually start transitioning.? He nods and continues, ?This is a quite significant change to your life, have you given a lot of thought to this? From the little experience I?ve seen, as well as my readings, it?s not something that should be rushed into. I?m not a therapist and I don?t claim any particular expertise in this. And I?m not trying to make you change your mind, I just want to be sure you understand what you?re asking and that you are fully committed to it.? I sigh a little, ?Yes, I am fully committed to it. I guess it took finding someone who understood, and was supportive to make me realize what I really want.? I pause as I think back to Master Wu and continue, ?Sometimes, I?m finding out, it takes someone you?ve met, who seems to really understand you, to help you better understand yourself.? He looks at me for a moment, ?I see. I just want to be certain, neither Ms. Thomas nor anyone else is rushing you into this. Is that correct?? I look at him directly, ?No one is forcing me into anything. Any more than I?ve been forced into living in this body since I can remember.? He thinks on that, before responding, ?Good, I just want to be sure. What you?ve described about your growing up, that?s a fairly typical story, from what I understand. Would you like to tell me some more? Incidents, moments, thoughts, the like? I?d like to get to know more about you a little better.? I relate the various events of my life, the times I did dress, venturing out, almost getting caught, the constant fear of being discovered. He listens and takes some notes, acting almost supportive. ?Are you unhappy being male? Have you ever considered doing anything drastic because of it?? I think for a moment, ?No, I think it?s more that I?ve been unhappy that I?m not a female. All the life experiences I?ve missed, the frustrations I?ve had because I know what I should have been. How I?ve forced myself to become what you see, to compensate. As I said, I?ve learned to get along, cover all that up. I just don?t want to do it anymore. I know it isn?t me.? ?I see,? he thinks a moment and continues, ?I want you to understand that you?re considering a drastic change to your body. Changing one?s outward sex is a very complicated and potentially dangerous procedure. I would like to talk to you about what?s required, what may happen, your understanding of medical part of it, and mostly to make sure you have seriously considered the physical implications and possible consequences, and all that it means. As I have said, this is not something to be taken lightly.? ?I know.? ?I?m sure you do to some extent. But let me go into more detail.? Which he does, as he explains the process, the expectations, the surgeries, and possible outcomes. ?I?m going to give you some literature, and web sites that I?d like you go to and read up on. Some additional real life experiences, where things didn?t go quite as expected and where they did. Changing your gender is no guarantee that your life will be any better. Your life is what you make of it. But if this will correct one aspect of who you are, like recovering from any affliction, it can allow you to focus on the things that you can and want to do to live a healthy and perhaps, more enjoyable life.? ?Now, I?m strictly a general practitioner, specializing in women?s health, so I can start you on the prescriptions, start you on a regimen, explain the diet that will be beneficial. Any actual surgeries will come from referrals by me to specialists. I know of several who are qualified, and we?ll get you in to see them when the time is ready. I?m familiar with the current standards of care, and if you want me to be your primary care physician, we will follow them. It?s not a quick process, it will take some time. Do you understand that and agree to it?? I think, yes, it?s really what I sort of expected. I wonder if it?s what Jillian expected. I take a breath and respond, ?Yes, I understand and I agree.? ?Good, you will need to sign some waivers, and I will write the starting prescriptions today. We?ll get you on what I mentioned earlier, Hormone Replacement Therapy or HRT, and I?ll be monitoring your condition as we go. But I?d like you to think about all this again before you start. Give yourself at least the weekend, go over the literature and the internet and call me Monday and let me know.? ?Oh, okay, that?s probably a good idea. Thanks.? ?Part of the process is that you will start living as a young woman as soon as is practicable. Starting to get experiences, and learning how to deal with the changes you will be going through is the best experience.? It is starting, I think I?m ready for it, I hope, ?Yes, I can see that.? ?Just one more item. The standards of care are somewhat flexible. Just on my recommendation, you could start the surgeries required. But I may at some time ask that you see a trained therapist. Is that acceptable?? ?Yes, that?s fine. Do you see that possibility?? probably not a bad idea, except I?ve always had an aversion to shrinks. ?At this moment, no, but I like to make sure my clients understand that lots can happen in any procedure or process and they should be prepared as best they can.? ?Okay, I was just a little worried, but I guess that?s normal. I think I?m ready.? ?Good, so let?s go ahead and set up a schedule of visits, and I?ll write the prescriptions, have them called into your pharmacy, and give you a suggested diet and the rest. You seem like a very intelligent and confident person, Chris, that and your good health, are a good start on this.? ?Thanks, Dr. Sanjay.? And I inwardly hope I can live up to this expectation. I know I said all the right words, the words I know the doctor wants to hear, and actually I want to hear. I have to admit that this whole process is moving so much faster than I had ever anticipated or even imagined just days ago. I?m sure I?m doing the right thing. It?s just that I?ve had doubts about so many things for so long, I can?t help but feel some tinges now. Will they subside? I don?t know. I leave and Stephan pulls up as I walk to the parking lot. ?Everything go okay? Do we need to stop anywhere?? he pleasantly asks as I get in the front seat. ?No problem. I suppose we can go by the pharmacy, if it?s on the way.? ?Sure.? We head back to the compound with a stop, and Stephan doesn?t ask any more about the visit. I?m very happy that privacy seems to be respected. I?ll no doubt mention something, but when I?m ready. About 7:30, Stephan calls and says they?re heading out and to meet him by the main house. I get there, and he and Aaron are ready to go. Thad, of course, is with Ms. Thomas. I?ve been in L.A. long enough to know what to wear, and we?re all in pretty much the same ?uniform? (as it were), just different shades, patterns, and cuts. The car is a late model sedan with Aaron driving with Stephan in the back seat. He motions me to the front passenger seat. Okay! I?m up front with Aaron. ?Hey, guys, thanks for including me.? ?Glad you could come,? Stephan replies. Aaron barely looks my way and just grunts a little. Is it me? I again wonder. Does an attitude come with the looks? I push on, though, ?While I got you both here, what?s your schedules look like in the next couple of days? I?d like to get that training going and give you all a demonstration for starters.? ?Great,? Stephan says, and Aaron even seems to perk up. They give me some times along with what they believe is Thad?s schedule, and possibly Kitae?s. It will be tough to get all four together, but three at a time is probably easier. Stephan mentions that Ms. Thomas had strongly suggested they coordinate their schedules to include some training, and Elizabeth got right on it. ?Actually that should work out as I like everyone working out with a partner, and we?ll change off.? We agree on a demonstration over the weekend, and training three days a week starting Monday, allowing for people to be able to attend two. Plus we have to allow slight changes for when Ms. Thomas wants me to accompany her. This all should work out well for me. And I have to make sure Elizabeth is given all the information and we can set up a workable schedule for everyone. Just as we get that settled, we get to the club, park nearby, and walking up, I see that Kevin is already there. ?Hey, Kev, hope you haven?t been waiting long.? ?Hey, Chris, nope, just got here.? I introduce him to my co-workers and Stephan is friendly immediately, probably because I did fill him in, mostly because he?s an outgoing guy, while Aaron is a little reserved. I did notice his bodily response when I recognized Kevin, with him showing some signs of surprise. Learning that Kevin was a wrestler in high school, and continued for a while in college warms him up?to Kevin. Now I?m really wondering if it?s me. There?s a crowd building up outside and Kevin mentions quietly to me, concerned if we?ll be able to get in, but it?s obvious Stephan or Aaron know somebody as we are let right in. Thad shows up a little later for awhile as Ms. Thomas is up the coast at some private affair, giving him some time. She had suggested he stop by. Inside the club, we meet up with some friends of Stephan and Aaron, check out who?s all there, and they set me with some young women to dance with. I?m a decent dancer, and have a good time, but I don?t follow up with any of them. I do note that Aaron seems to glance my way a little too often, but says practically nothing to me the entire evening. Since Stephan, Kevin, and later Thad, all easily include me, I don?t let it bother me much. Kevin is also included in conversations, even by Aaron who acts quite friendly to him. Aaron eventually hooks up with a young woman and leaves with her, after doing a casual, but obvious glance in my direction. A little while after Thad has to head back to where Ms. Thomas is, Kevin nudges me saying he has to leave too. ?Hey, can I get a ride with you?? I ask because I need to talk to him alone about some things. ?Sure, but we have to go now, you?re not too far away are you?? ?No, but I?ll have you drop me off a ways from where I?m at. You understand, this is a private residence, and the less people know, the better.? ?Okay. You know I?d never tell.? ?Yeah, but I don?t want to put you in any difficult position, either.? I mention to him that I?ll be leaving Avery?s gym as an instructor when I finish my current classes, and I?m recommending him as an instructor to Avery. He?s appreciative of that as well as that I?ll be still coming occasionally and we can continue working out together. During a lull, he says, ?One other thing I noticed tonight, Chris; Aaron seems like an okay guy, but it looks like he?s giving you the cold shoulder. I can?t believe you?d do anything to tick people off. Does he have some problem?? I sigh, ?Yeah, I?ve noticed that too, and I have no idea. Just one of those things I guess, I must rub him the wrong way.? ?Well, just be careful around him.? ?Yeah, I will, thanks for mentioning that,? I say as I glance out the window. ?You can let me off here. Thanks for the ride.? ?Okay,? he replies as he pulls over. ?Say, a lot of nice digs here. You?re moving up the world.? After I get out a long block or so from the estate, I walk up and use the card at the personnel entrance and it works. The next day, I give the demonstration in the gym on the grounds, explaining my training a little, without mentioning the Ohio incident. I do think they know about it, but it shouldn?t matter. Finally I take Stephan, Aaron, and Kitae on one at a time as Thad is working. Kitae is a little leery of me as he mentions our first meeting. Stephan gives it a try and I can see that he?s trying to use too much force instead of allowing fluid body movements to achieve his goals. I easily handle him. After each demo, I explain what I?m doing, and offer each suggestions and pointers on what they?ve shown me. Then I take on Aaron. We spar around and I can tell immediately that he has had more training than the other two. He?s actually pretty good. I do take him down several times demonstrating some throws, which I can tell irritates him. ?Can we try Karate?? he asks, which I agree to and he rather quickly he switches to Kenpo, the more aggressive style. I surmise this is because I hadn?t mentioned it. Perhaps he may have assumed that I either didn?t know it or was not as good as he thought himself to be. Master Wu taught me that last, and advised me to be quite cautious using it, because it is can be the most violent of the hand to hand martial arts, especially if not used correctly, as it emphasizes trying to overwhelm one?s opponent with a flurry of attacks. It takes me several seconds to interpret his moves, and respond, which I am able to do, backing him into a corner before pulling back and going into a neutral stance, assuming he would also, as I began addressing the others. ?What you just saw is called Kenpo Karate, although it has several different names and styles, but?? Before I can finish, I catch Aaron out of the corner of my eye, with sort of a wild look in his eye, as he leaps towards me. At once the others say, ?Hey, man, what?re you doing?? I sidestep his attack, and immediately drop him to the ground into a body pin. I then whisper close to his ear, ?It?s about controlling your emotions. Learn that, and you?ll be even better.? I say aloud as I release him, ?Okay, that?s enough of a demonstration. We?ll start in earnest on Monday. You all know the schedule I?ve created. Plan on some serious workouts.? Aaron avoids me as they all work out a little more and leave. Later that day, I run into Stephan in the dining area and we talk about Friday night and the club scene. He offers, ?Your friend, Kevin, seems like a nice guy, and fit in with all of us. Any time he wants to join us again, that should be fine, without even asking.? ?Thanks, Kevin?s a great friend. But, I really want to ask you about Aaron. Does he have problems, or is it just my imagination?? Stephan looks at me with a little grin and a nod, ?We wondered when you were going to ask. Thad and I have both noticed how he?s treating you. Except for that stupid leap at you earlier today, it?s been not really bad, but barely civil. Let me explain some things which might help.? I take a breath, a little relieved in a way that what I was seeing was that obvious to the others, and concerned that there may be lots more to this than I imagined. ?Ok, you probably know by now that we?re very professional around Ms. Thomas, no intimacy, no involvement. I like her a lot, but I understand. We all do, and it?s working for all of us, even Aaron. But only to a point with him.? ?I can see that,? I say as I nod my head. Stephan continues, ?He actually was involved with her before he became a bodyguard/driver. A little over a year ago, he met her on some location, and they got a little intimate, but she broke it up, and he seemed to accept that, at least that?s what little we?ve gotten from both of them. She hired him on with that understanding, but it?s rather obvious he?s still got some deeper feelings about her. Not enough to get him fired, but he?s going to have to be careful.? ?Oh! Okay, huh, that explains an awful lot, you know?? ?Yeah, well, you do realize that he?s most likely jealous of you. And not just of you now, but your future, too, we?re guessing. He did try to get Ms. Thomas to try him as a companion, but she very politely declined. We think he?s still upset a little.? ?That explains a lot.? But before I can say anything else, Stephan continues, ?There?s some more. I don?t want to say he?s homophobic, but we think he does have some issues. You?re now going to be forcing responses from him. We?re all hoping they?ll be positive, because he is an okay guy, basically. You saw that with Kevin. I just thought you should know.? ?Thanks,? I sigh, even here in paradise, all is not perfect, not that I expected it, but I was hoping. I continue, ?I can see that in some ways, he?s okay. I?ll just have to be on my guard with him, I guess.? ?Chris, from what I?ve seen of you, I think you?re doing fine. It?s the next stage, I think where some problems may arise.? ?Yeah, I can guess,? I pause, and then looking at him directly, continue, ?You all do know what I?ll be going through, right?? ?Yeah,? he nods and looks at me a little ruefully, ?and like I?ve said, we know what Ms. Thomas wants and are supportive of her, and you, if you?re able to handle it. I?m not envious of you in the least. From what little I know, I think you have a difficult road coming up, but we?ll be here if you ever want to talk about things. We?ll just have to keep working on Aaron, especially if he wants to continue here.? ?Thanks, Stephan, you don?t know how much I appreciate that.? ?Hey, we can see Ms. Thomas? responses to you already, and they?re what we were hoping. Not to put too much pressure on you, but keep it up!? I roll my eyes at that, ?Yeah. Thanks.? Well, my path is getting a little clearer, I guess. Some more pieces of what Elizabeth and the others have been saying are falling into place. This is certainly an interesting job, and interesting times. For the rest of the day, I read the info the doctor gave me as well as look up the internet sites, and I call him back on Monday. He takes my call personally and I tell him that I will be starting the medication. He sounds satisfied and just reminds me to follow the directions as well as the diet and regimen he has prescribed, which I promise I will do. On Tuesday, I escort Jillian shopping to some of the stores in Beverly Hills, where she doesn?t have accounts, and it?s a pleasant day, as we encounter no problems. We?re not intimate in any way, just very friendly, and positive, and I attribute that to our having gotten beyond that. I?m certainly not kicking myself. She has been in preliminary meetings about the movie off and on and will be starting the next day. The two weeks seem to fly by now. I have become very involved with the training classes, and my four ?students? are very attentive and mostly eager to learn, for different reasons, as I have figured out. Aaron keeps to himself, not showing any obvious hostility, but I can feel some subtle responses especially when I let him practice on me. He carries each action several seconds beyond the others and uses a lot more pure strength. I?m ready for it, but I keep things civil. Ms. Thomas even stops by for a class, dressed in obviously expensive designer gym wear and wants to experience some of what I?ve been teaching?and know. ?Hi, Chris, guys.? They respond back with ?Hello, Ms. Thomas? except Aaron who adds a slight frown to his face that I may be the only one noticing. ?So, Chris, let?s see what you can do. And do you think you can teach me some simple moves in the next half hour?? I roll my eyes a little, as I?m sure she knows nothing is that easy, but I respond, ?Sure, Ms. Thomas, I have some I can show you and get you started probably on at least one.? ?That will be fine, let?s get going, then.? I take her through a typical training session, with a little meditation first. I can see that she?s not enamored by it, even if it is just a fraction of what I put the others through, but she accepts it. We do some stretches. Then, using Thad, Aaron, and Kitae, I show her some of the different simpler moves and responses. Finally, I take her on, doing some easy throws with her, and then showing her one specific move and letting her practice on me. Too soon, of course, she has to leave, as Stephan comes to retrieve her, and she says, ?That was very nice, Chris, thank you. I?ll see if I can make a little more time and come more often. Bye, now.? The days pass as I give the classes, change my workouts to include different sets of exercises that I know I?ll need as my body changes, and accompany Jillian on another outing, this one much quicker than the last, for lunch at one of the chains. Eventually, Tuesday and my last day of teaching classes at Avery?s has arrived. It?s seems to have come upon me far too quickly, and I?m not sure I?m prepared for it. I barely talk to Avery as he seems busy. I have very mixed emotions as I go through the final moves, positions, responses. As I leave after my last class, where the students are understanding but still a little depressed that I won?t be continuing my instruction, I come by Avery who is also now a little gloomy in his way. He has only a hint of his normal smile as he says quietly, ?Hey, Chris, I know you?ll be around, but the time you?ve been teaching here has been great. It?s helped the gym grow and lots of students have really appreciated your classes. I know you?re on to bigger challenges, but it?s still a little sad to see you go.? I detect a little tear, not in his eyes, but definitely in his voice. I try to cheer him up as I say, ?You know, I?ll be around as much as I can, and if I can help any student who?s here when I am, I?ll be happy to do it. Anyway, I?m hoping there may come a time when I can tell you everything, and maybe help you and this place lots more. You?ve been a great employer, and even better friend. I can never say enough nice things about you and the gym. Who knows, maybe I?ll be in a position to teach again. And anyway, you?ve got Kevin as a teacher now, and I know he?ll do a great job for you.? Avery smiles a little, nodding at my attempts, replying, ?If you ever decide to teach again, you come here first. So, good luck in your new job. I hope they know what a great guy they have. And don?t be a stranger, either. Okay?? ?Avery, for you, I?ll never be one as long as I can help it.? ?Hey!? we say to each other with a little tinge of emotion in our voices as we shake hands. And then he says, ?Oh, what the hell? and gives me a bear hug. As one chapter in my life ends, I?m getting quite involved in the next one. Only two days later, on a Thursday, I have those appointments with Jillian?s hair dresser and make-up artist. I first go to Serge who does several things I wasn?t expecting. He colors my hair a little lighter than it was, does a razor cut giving me a rather unisexual style, and he fits me for several medium dark blond wigs of various lengths, that come close to matching my new hair color. ?These are to start with, Chris,? he says as he carefully helps me put each one on, ?soon we will be looking at a weave and extensions. You have very nice hair, very fine but thick. I?m sure I will be able to do nice things eventually.? Ulp! I think. I wasn?t quite expecting all that, but I suppose it?s all right. As he explains how to care for them (much more involved than I had ever done), he holds up a mirror opposite the large installed one and already I?m noticing differences in my looks. The hair color and now wigs seem to bring out the very subtle changes that I?ve already felt were happening from the prescriptions, diet and change in exercises. And these wigs are so much more luxurious than the ones I had been using, obviously very expensive and the best of human hair. Yet, they?re only temporary. It leaves me a little breathless as I look at myself. I then go to Danny, taking one of the wigs with me as Serge requested, and I?m in for a bigger surprise. I thought Danny was only going to give me tips and ideas, show some possibilities, using the one wig as a guide. Instead, I get a complete facial after he works at removing as much facial hair as possible with standard methods. Finishing that, he removes most my leg and arm hair. When I question it, he responds, ?Ms. Thomas said that you were finished giving public classes and if you want to work out at that gym, just wear warm-ups. Nobody will really notice, unless they get very close. Trust me on this.? I really have no choice. Then, he has a nail tech come in and give me a manicure and pedicure, actually putting on high end press on nails with a clear polish, slightly longer than mine. Following that, she pierces my ears putting in small hoops. Danny then comes back explaining about the earrings, ?You can take them off after they set up, for short amounts of time. But get them back in soon.? As he starts a complete make-up job on my face, constantly looking me over, he says ?There?s a lot to learn to about make-up, Chris. Most women start at a young age and through trial and error, sharing with friends, and just experimenting, learn to do their own. Even then, they?re still almost novices at it. It will take a little while, but you?ll learn lots more. Especially how to care for your skin. You have a very nice complexion, and those green eyes and slight dimples, what you?re going to learn first is how to compliment and accent them.? He gives me a running explanation on what he?s doing, encouraging me to pay attention and asking occasional questions to make sure I understand. He shapes and trims my eyebrows explaining, ?I?m not doing a lot, thicker eyebrows when done right look very attractive, and without penciling, you won?t look that much different.? When he?s finally finished, he helps me on with the wig and then allows me to look at myself, I am not a little surprised at how seemingly attractive I do look, even still wearing boy clothes and with a boyish figure. ?Hello, Chrissy,? a voice I recognize says behind me. I look in the mirror and there is Jillian looking very intently at me. I?m not sure at first it is Jillian other than by her voice because she is in a redhead look, shorter hair just above the shoulders, wearing a nice tailored suit, but not something you would think Jillian Thomas would wear. With her dark glasses, she is sort of unrecognizable. Except I now know that smile, that voice, her demeanor. ?Oh, hi, Jillian,? I reply as I realize she has been there for at least a few moments if not longer. And now I get a little flushed. I know, she has helped me with make-up, but this is even so different than what we did. And I stop thinking about how she appears, only that she is seeing me as I have only in my dreams imagined myself. ?Just as I?ve always suspected, you do look quite attractive?very, very pretty. I see Serge has selected a nice color and style for you, and Danny here has done his usual absolutely marvelous magic.? Danny smiles, saying a quiet, ?Thank you.? I just smile, not sure exactly what to say, trying to hide my obvious blushing. ?Are you finished here?? she asks Danny with her quite pleasant but unable to reply no to voice. ?Yes, Ms. Thomas, I believe Chrissy here is ready.? Ready for what? I wonder, as Jillian continues, ?Come on, Chrissy, let?s go over to your place. We need to find something nice to go with your new look. I?m thinking I know just the ensemble.? She takes my hand and just pulls me along. ?Isn?t Serge just wonderful with all the things he can do with hair? I?m so lucky I found him. He?s got just the right color for you. You look so natural. And Danny, I just love what he can do with cosmetics. Like that scene in the Emerald City where all those people sing about all the different ways they can make someone look. I don?t know what I?d do without them. And I just know you?ll see as time goes by, all the looks they can give you. Don?t you agree?? I can barely get out any words at all, as she just effuses about them and about how good I now look. And I certainly can?t get any of my questions in, between everything she?s asking me and going on. In moments, we?re in my little bedroom and she is going through the closet, where she pulls out one of my cuter dresses, which she had earlier stated was one of the really nice ones. Soon, I?m into panties, a bra, with my inserts, the dress, 3? pumps, and some simple jewelry, a touch of perfume. She hands me my sunglasses and small clutch, and says as I turn around in front of the mirror, looking at myself, ?This should complete it. You look very attractive Chrissy, just like I had hoped you would. Come on, we have dinner reservations. We have to get going.? I stop and look at her with a little shock, ?What? You?I don?t?.? She wants us to go out, now, the first time I?m truly dressed and looking so?so feminine. But I can?t, I mean, I?m not ready for this. Am I? As if to answer my thoughts, she says ?It?s time you let the world see just how gorgeous you do look, and besides, I?m getting hungry.? She looks at me in that way, and I know that look, and what she means. My heart is beating a mile a minute, but I take her outstretched hand, saying a quiet, ?Ok,? and we head out to a waiting vehicle. To be continued?????.