"Godddd..." I moan as I prop myself up on my elbows on a towel on the
floor of the converted London taxi. "Why does it have to take this
long?"
"It'll take as long as it takes," Hannah replies from the driver's seat
of the taxi.
"Not 'that'," I say. "I mean my damned dilation..." I stare down at the
thick orange tube poking out of my vagina and sigh again.
"Do you want me to get you a pillow, or something?" Hannah asks.
"No, I'll be fine," I say, trying to sound at least SLIGHTLY grateful
for the company. "I know I shouldn't complain really, I mean, this is
nothing compared to what Mary's going through..."
After finishing my dilation, Hannah and I head back into the hospital
waiting room, where the rest of the Angels- along with Keith and Stuart-
are waiting for us. After greeting Stuart with a kiss, I sit down next
to him and wearily rest my head on his shoulder.
"Any news?" I ask.
"Not a peep," Krystie moans. "God... Why don't they just C-section her and
have done with it?"
"You know Mary would never accept the scar," Charlotte sighs. "And she
was dead set on having a natural birth..." As if on cue, the door to the
maternity ward opens, and Dan walks out, pushing his still-heavily
pregnant wife in a wheelchair.
"False alarm," Dan says, shaking his head to mass groans.
"Don't you fucking groan!" Mary snaps, rubbing her vast belly. "I want
this thing out of me now!"
"Then induce!" Krystie pleads with her best friend.
"I don't want to induce," Mary moans as she's wheeled back to her car.
"Not yet, anyway..."
"Sooner or later, you're going to have to make a choice," Dan says
tiredly.
"I know, I know," Mary sighs. "Can- can we just go home, please?" Dan
nods and drives the distressed girl back to their posh London flat,
leaving the rest of us standing around aimlessly.
"We'd best get home as well," Charlotte orders. Tiredly, all of us
return to our respective rides- Keith drives Charlotte, Hannah and Viks
home in the 'Angelmobile', whilst Stuart drives myself, Krystie and
Nikki (the Angels' new PA) to our respective homes in his car.
"Can you drop me at my studio please, Stu?" Krystie asks. "Now that I
know I'm not going to be on 'auntie' duties I might as well set up for a
lesson."
"Can do," Stuart says.
"I'll let Sarah know it's on tonight," Nikki says, straightening her
short pencil skirt and typing out a message on her phone. "Want me to
post on the Facebook group?"
"Please," Krystie replies.
"Ah, what would the girls do without you, Nikki?" Stuart jokes, making
the 17 year old girl giggle and making me and Krystie roll our eyes.
"I know how to post a message on Facebook," Krystie moans.
"Yes, but only on the rare occasion you know where your phone is,"
Stuart retorts- and this time, I can't help but let out a tiny giggle.
"You know, when I cleared out your desk, I actually found two old mobile
phones in there?" Nikki says, making the whole car- even Krystie- laugh.
"What happened to them?" Krystie asks. "I trust you're not stealing
company property, Miss Thomas..."
"One of them was smashed to bits," Nikki explains. "The other one had
half a Mars bar melted into the adaptor socket, so I didn't dare charge
either of them up."
"That's probably for the best," Krystie laughs.
"I guess I shouldn't really complain about being back and forth to the
hospital," I muse as we drive along. "I mean, you were the same when I
was in hospital in April, after all."
"And I expect the same when I'm in hospital next October!" Stuart
laughs.
"And me when... Well, whenever, I guess..." Nikki laughs, before her voice
trails off sadly.
"Oh Nikki," I begin. "Have you still not got a date?"
"No," the young woman sighs. "I was aiming for after my first year of
uni, but now that I'm not going to uni..."
"You're not having second thoughts, are you?" I ask the girl I'm
increasingly viewing as a prot?g?.
"No, definitely not," Nikki confirms. "It's just... A LOT of hassle."
"Believe me," I say with a smile on my face. "It's well worth the hassle
in the end." Stuart smiles and squeezes my hand as we head home.
"Mum, dad, we're home," I call as I lead my boyfriend through my front
door.
"Any news?" Dad asks, before seeing my companion. "Oh, hello Stuart!"
"Hi Mark," Stuart replies, enthusiastically shaking my dad's hand before
sitting down next to me on the sofa.
"No 'hi' for your own daughter..." I joke, making dad roll his eyes.
"Hi Jamie," dad mock-sighs with a smirk on his face. "And for the second
time: any news?"
"No, another false alarm," I sigh.
"God above," dad exclaims. "How overdue is that baby now?"
"Five days," Stuart answers. "And to answer your next question, no,
she's not inducing or having a C-section."
"Don't see why she's being so stubborn," dad moans. "Did you know Jamie
was born by a Caesarean?"
"I think you may have told me before," Stuart says, giving me a quick
hug.
"Yeah, let's just share all my personal details," I joke as the two most
important men in my life laugh at my expense.
"What have you two kids got planned for tonight?" Dad asks.
"Trying out a new Peruvian restaurant that's opened in Westminster,"
Stuart says.
"Ah," dad says. "You and the rest of the Angels, or is this a hot date?"
"Hot date," I say, feeling slightly embarrassed by the candid way my
father is discussing my love life.
"I leave the door unlocked," dad laughs.
"Speaking of, I've got to get home," Stuart sighs, checking his watch.
"Got some work to catch up on. See you tonight, babe." Stuart gives me a
lingering kiss as he stands up, waving at me all the way out the front
door.
"I really, really like him," dad says, relaxing back into his chair with
a smile.
"I- I actually love him," I confess.
"GOOD," dad says. "I've said all along that you don't need a man to be
happy, but ever since you started seeing Stuart you've been a whole new
woman."
"I started seeing him a couple of weeks after my surgery," I giggle.
"Technically, I WAS a whole new woman!"
"Oh, you know what I mean," dad says. "And who knows? In a couple of
years I may get to walk you down the aisle..."
"Bit early to be thinking about that!" I say dismissively.
"Your grandmother got married when she was 22," dad says, still
chuckling happily. "So did two of your great-aunts..."
"Well, yeah your daughter WON'T," I say firmly.
"I'll settle for when you're 23," dad laughs, making me roll my eyes as
I turn my attention to my phone.
After a light snack- I don't want to ruin my appetite for dinner, after
all- I change into my outfit for the night. It being a boiling hot July
day, I'd only worn a loose sundress over a comfortable bra and panty
set, but for my date, I want to wear something special. I exchange my
comfortable panties for a mesh thong- the mesh breathes enough to be
comfortable around my still-healing, still slightly swollen area, and is
see-through enough to show off said 'area'! I decide against a bra,
instead picking out a dark red halter neck dress with built-in
'support'. The dress is clingy enough to show off my curves- and my
cleavage- and short enough to give my tanned legs the same exposure,
especially when paired with the strappy 4" heeled sandals I'm planning
to wear! I repaint my toenails and fingernails a dark red colour to
match the dress, and apply a thick layer of make-up, including two
different shades of red lipstick. After spraying on a cloud of perfume,
I tie the sandals to my feet (giggle at how similar it is to tying on a
pair of pointe shoes), tie my hair into a playful updo, grab my handbag
and head downstairs to where my sexy boyfriend is waiting for me.
"Hey, beautiful," Stuart says, greeting me with a soft kiss. Stuart, for
his part, is wearing a pair of plain black trousers, smart black shoes
and a light-blue short sleeved shirt with a decorative pattern stitched
into it. It probably took him five minutes to get ready, as opposed to
the 30 minutes plus I took, but it hasn't stopped him from looking
seriously hot.
"Hey, sexy," I reply, slipping my hand into the back pocket of his
trousers as he leads us to our taxi.
Just over an hour later, after finishing our delicious meal, Stuart and
I take a gentle stroll, hand-in-hand, along the brightly-lit streets of
the sprawling city.
"You know," I muse, "I've lived in London my whole life, sometimes I
forget just what a beautiful city it is."
"I know, I'm the same," Stuart says. "Well, 'whole life' apart from 3
years of uni, anyway."
"Ah yes, how could I forget?" I say with a grin. "Sexy AND talented.
When are you going to write me a song?"
"I think James Blunt beat me to it," Stuart laughs. "You're beautiful..."
I can't help but giggle contentedly as Stuart serenades me.
"It's getting late," I whisper after Stuart finishes his song. "We
should get home..." Stuart sees the devilish grin in my eyes and
immediately susses out why I'm so eager to get home.
"Taxi!" Stuart yells, returning my excited smile.
We arrive home less than half an hour later and all but leap into each
other's mouths the second we reach my bedroom door. It doesn't take long
for me to strip Stuart down to his boxer shorts, and he quickly unties
my halter neck, freeing my breasts for him to play with, paying special
attention to my stiffening nipples. I'm soon freed from the dress- and
my thong- and I leap into Stuart's arms, allowing him to carry me the
short distance to my bed. I gently lower his shorts, freeing his swollen
clitoris, and I give it a quick kiss, allowing its short, but not
insignificant length to slip between my lips. Immediately, Stuart is
moaning in ecstasy, and it doesn't take him long to pulse in orgasm from
the 'blowjob'. As he recovers, I lay on my back on the bed, my legs as
wide as my recovering crotch will allow.
"Three months," I say with a devilish grin. Still panting heavily,
Stuart returns to my breasts, gently teasing my nipples, before running
a finger down my body to my own, brand-new clitoris. I feel a wave of
electricity flow over me as his finger gently strokes it, eliciting the
feelings I've waited so long to feel. As Stuart gently slips a finger
into my vagina, I can feel the climax building inside me when all of a
sudden, it's as if the orgasm 'bursts' and I pant heavily- but not as
heavily as I've done in the past when men have made love to me.
"Was that good for you?" Stuart asks.
"I think so," I reply, bringing a confused look to Stuart's face.
"You THINK so?" He asks, sounding particularly put out by my response.
"Give me a break," I reply, hopping off my bed to get my dilating kit.
"I've never had a vaginal orgasm before!"
"But you have had orgasms," Stuart replies. "And if you only THINK
so..."
"Oh relax," I say, lubricating the dilator and inserting it into my
vagina. "We've got time to work it out! Besides, I kinda like the
thought of you 'exploring' my body..."
"Where no man has gone before," Stuart chuckles, laying down beside my
naked body. "Well, no flesh and blood man, anyway..."
"Oh, stop being so jealous of a dilator!" I laugh. Stuart also laughs,
but it's clear that even after three months, he's still uncomfortable
when I dilate in front of him.
After I remove the dilator and climb in bed, snuggling up to my sexy
boyfriend despite the warmth, I can't help but muse on how perfect my
life has been since my surgery in April. The recovery proceeded
perfectly, without complications- I've followed my (ever decreasing)
routine of vaginal care to the letter, and aside from the slowly fading
pink scars, you truly wouldn't be able to tell that I hadn't been born
female. Even my gynaecologist has remarked on how quick my recovery is-
though given how expensive my SRS surgeon was, I'd be a bit put out if
my recovery wasn't this quick!
As quick as my recovery has been, though, I'm still not back to absolute
100%. I haven't returned to my regular Monday ballet lessons yet (though
I will be this Monday coming) and have been taking remedial lessons
alongside Krystie's adult intermediate class to get some flexibility
back in me. Joshua keeping me busy with light work also means I don't
have the opportunity to rest and catch my breath- immediately after my
surgery, I worried that I was going to get cabin fever from being cooped
up in my bedroom for so long, now I'd give anything for a lazy day like
that.
Most of the reason for my increased demand is the debut of the first
season proper of our TV show. We're still receiving high viewing figures
and rave reviews- well, for a reality show, anyway- and all six of us
have seen our public profiles go through the roof. We don't seem to be
able to go two days without one of us being interviewed on TV or
featured in a magazine- and it's my turn tomorrow to keep that 'run'
alive! The one sad thing is that between Mary's pregnancy and my
surgery, there hasn't really been any opportunity for the six of us to
appear all together- though the other four are more than picking up the
slack, especially Viks, who finished university last month with a 2:1
and seems to be fully embracing the celebrity lifestyle! Our show has
been renewed for a second season, though, so we're all but guaranteed to
do big group events like we did for our big 'premiere' in December last
year.
...Though Joshua seems determined to expand his 'brand- and, in fairness,
it is HIS brand. As hard as we've worked behind the scenes to promote
the show, Joshua's worked as hard as all six of us combined, even making
rare TV appearances himself (something that would have been unthinkable
for him a mere 12 months ago). For the second season, Joshua's quite
open about lining up his niece Adeola and Stuart's sister Rebecca as
additional Angels, or forming a separate 'group' centred around them. As
they're both highly talented singers, I wouldn't be surprised if Joshua
holds auditions and promotes them as part of the next great girl band.
If we get a third season of the Angels, Joshua's even thought about
including Nikki and her girlfriend as part of the group, especially
given that Nikki's already an unofficial 'seventh Angel' already. Hell,
next season Joshua's even giving airtime to the boys- Stuart, Keith,
Dan, Jonathan, Paul (Kennedy) and Riley have been hanging out together a
lot, even despite Paul's recent break-up with Krystie, and many media
outlets have already started referring to them as the 'boy Angels'.
Joshua signing them all to exclusive 'zero-hour' contracts certainly
helps that point of view. It shouldn't surprise you either to learn that
Stuart and I were photographed by reporters when we arrived at the
restaurant for our date.
Our private parties, however, continue to be as fun as ever. As both
Mary and I were 'side-lined' for Dan's, Riley's & Charlotte's birthdays
in May, we skipped our usual costume parties (much to Becca's
disappointment, as she was looking to 'treating' her boyfriend), but
they'll be back in force for Krystie's 22nd at the end of the month- in
the shape of ridiculous sci-fi inspired costumes. When I first saw what
Charlotte had in mind I honestly thought she was joking, and Mary nearly
left the Angels then and there- the costumes are skin-tight red PVC
leotards with a very skimpy thong back. Complementing the leotards are
thigh-high platform boots and long gauntlets in matching red PVC, and
black plastic 'armour' (which also naturally doubled as a corset) to
cover the leotards (whilst not covering our buttock or our cleavage, of
course). Winged 'helmets', sci-fi inspired gizmos on our wrists and, of
course, huge toy laser rifles complete the utterly ridiculous look,
which is a far cry from the exquisite Nutcracker-inspired tutus we wore
last year! A part of me actually hopes that Mary will manage to hold off
giving birth long enough that we'll be spared the 'experience' of
wearing the damned things...
...Though they'd undoubtedly get us in every tabloid newspaper the
following day, as would the comparatively normal sci-fi 'armour' the
boys will be wearing, and looking incredibly sexy doing so. As much as
I'm seen as an inspiration to transgendered girls around the country
(Angels is extremely popular with the LGBT demographic), Stuart's
increasingly being seen as an inspiration to boys on the 'opposite'
journey. The fact that he is about as blokish as it gets- in public,
anyway- only makes him more popular. He and the boys actually fulfilled
a lifelong ambition when they had a beer with the Top Gear presenters
after one of their live shoes in May, and Stuart in particular is
constantly on at Joshua to get me on Top Gear as the start in the
reasonably priced car!
But, as famous as he may get, as much as the public may embrace him as
their 'favourite transman', he'll ALWAYS be, first and foremost, my
favourite transman, just as I always intend to be his favourite girl-
trans or otherwise! And yet, as I cuddle up next to him in bed, I can't
help but shake the thoughts of what might have been.
I LOVE Stuart. I have no qualms about telling him this, to his face, on
a daily basis. No man has ever made me smile as wide, laugh as hard or
feel as blissfully content as he does. I could quite happily spend every
remaining second of my life in his company, and yet... There's something
lacking, as our sex session proved. To all intents and purposes, I AM
making love to another girl... and it's just not as satisfying as having
sex with a man... Like I did when I went out with Paul.
The more I look back on it, the more I realise that I did love Paul. No
man has ever made me orgasm as much, and in as many different ways as he
did. His tastes for kink perfectly matched my own, and he knew every
square millimetre of my body in intimate detail, knowing where to touch
me and how to touch me in order to leave me in ecstasy for ages on end...
And that was BEFORE I had a vagina. Now that I'm fully anatomically
female, I can only imagine how he'd be able to make me feel.
...But, as much as I love Stuart, and as much as my body craves Paul,
neither of them will ever match up to the one I let get away- Keith. He
is the true best of both worlds- as sensitive as Stuart, but as
passionate as Paul, and as attractive physically as both men put
together. He is the first man I ever loved and will always remain that
way. All those who come since- including Paul, including Stuart- will
find themselves measured against his standard, and will likely find
themselves lacking. And yet, I know deep down that I can never have that
which I desire the most, because as happy as I'd be in a relationship
with Keith, what I stand to lose is much, much greater.
Ultimately, I know I SHOULD be happy with Stuart. He 'gets' me like no
one- not even Charlotte- ever has. In bed... He certainly gets 10 out of
10 for effort. And it's not like I 'settled' for him, either, especially
given how long I'd pursued him before we became a couple. Since his 'get
well soon' in April, Paul's sent me more messages enquiring about how I
am- messages I haven't replied to, in fact I've gone as far as to tell
Nikki to block any incoming messages or calls from him. He's clearly
interested in getting back together, but he had his chance and he blew
it. As for Keith... he's still clearly not as happy with Charlotte as he
was before her infidelity, even twelve months after her convincing him
to take her back- which is also twelve months after he and I nearly made
love. I can't but feel that if I wanted Keith, I could have him any
time- but the cost would be too high.
I wake up at 8am on Wednesday morning with my head resting on Stuart's
pale chest and his strong arm wrapped around my naked body. After waking
him from his slumber with a series of gentle kisses, we eat a quick
breakfast before showering together and getting ready for the day ahead.
Stuarts dresses in a plain t-shirt and long shorts whilst I dilate- also
taking the opportunity to check my phone for any missed messages from
'Team Mary'- and, inevitably, there are no updates. With ten minutes to
kill until my dilating session finishes, I type out a message to the
Angels (and Nikki).
'Hey girls,' I type. 'MTV UK today... Anyone else up for it?' Following
Hannah 'gate-crashing' my interview in February, it's become an Angel
tradition that when one of us is going for an interview, we check to see
if any of the others are free and want to tag along as well (I've got
myself additional TV time this way on more than one occasion).
'Me!' Nikki replies, eliciting mass 'lol's from the girls.
'Heh, one day, I promise!' I reply with a smiley face.
'Viks hasn't got anything booked in today iirc,' Nikki types.
'Yeah,' Viks types. 'I'd love to, but my family are kinda holding me
hostage today...' Viks types a frowning smiley- which I immediately
reciprocate.
'Han and Charlie are at a shoot,' Nikki continues. 'Krystie's obviously
teaching and Mary's obviously, well, you know. Looks like it's just you
today, Jamie!'
'Lol,' I reply. 'Stu's working all day too... I don't wanna be alone!'
'Aww, poor you,' Mary types with a sticking-out tongue smiley. 'Still,
could be worse, you could be the size of an office block, waiting to
push a bowling ball out of your vagina...'
'Aww,' I type with a smiley face. 'Think of all the baby cuddles you'll
be getting over the next few years!'
'Stop it, you're making me broody!' Charlotte types.
'It's making ME broody and I'm nine months pregnant!' Mary types,
eliciting another mass 'lol'.
'Got to go now,' I type with a warm smile. 'My public awaits!'
'You knock 'em dead girl!' Krystie types.
After I finish my dilation, I pick out my outfit for the day. I'm
appearing on MTV, so I want to be 'hip' whilst at the same time
'fashionable', so after pulling on a comfortable cotton bra & thong set
and applying a thick layer of make-up I pull on an 'Angels' branded tank
top and a short, straight leather skirt. I tie my hair up into a tight
ponytail and put in a pair of my dangliest earrings, before tying a pair
of strappy heeled sandals to my feet.
"Look out London," Stuart says as I spray on some sweet-smelling
perfume. "Here comes the world's sexiest girl!" I giggle as my boyfriend
gently kisses my bare neck and shoulders. "I'll see you later, at
Charlotte's, okay?"
"Yep," I say happily, grabbing my handbag and following Stuart down to
our respective cars. "See you later, sexy!" I bid Stuart farewell with a
long, lingering kiss before getting in my brand-new red Alfa Romeo and
driving to the posh TV studio.
My TV appearance today mainly involves talking about the series,
promoting our merchandise (like the tank top I'm wearing), with a few
minutes devoted to personal stuff, like Krystie's upcoming party and
Mary's baby. As always, the interview was a total success, and after
posing for selfies with the cast and crew, I hop back in my car and
check my messages. The show wasn't live, so I don't have the usual
voicemail from my mum, but I do have missed calls from both Nikki and,
to my surprise, Joshua. Frowning in confusion, I flick the 'redial'
button on the first call.
"Hi Jamie," Nikki says quietly. "Sorry, I can't talk long, I'm with
Charlotte and Hannah at the shoot and I'm kinda getting frowned at
already..."
"Don't worry about it," I say with a smile. "What did you want me for?"
"I got a text from Joshua," Nikki explains. "He asked me to ask you to
call him, didn't say why."
"I've got a missed call from him too," I muse. "Wonder what's so
important he got you to call me too?"
"I tried calling him, but he didn't say," Nikki explains. "He never
struck me as the 'enigmatic' type..."
"Oh, he can be, if he needs to be," I say. "I'll let you get back to
your frowns. See you later, Nikki." Immediately after ending the call, I
hit the speed-dial number for my agent.
"Jamie!" Joshua booms down the phone to me. "Get to the office now! We
need to talk."
"Oh, um, okay," I say, taken aback as always by Joshua's bombast. "I'm
not really dressed for a meeting..."
"Whatever you're wearing, it's fine!" Joshua says. "This won't take five
seconds anyway."
"...And we can't discuss it over the phone?" I ask.
"I'd prefer not to," Joshua says in a voice that's considerably quieter
than his usual speaking voice. Realising that what Joshua needs to
discuss is serious, I head straight for the vast office complex, where
I'm greeted at reception with awed coos from the other people waiting in
reception- even though some of them are also models signed to Joshua!
"Hi Jamie," Millie- the receptionist- says as I approach her. "Joshua's
in his office, just go up any time."
"Thanks," I reply, coolly striding up the modern staircase to Joshua's
vast office.
"Jamie!" Joshua booms as I walk through the door. "Please take a seat."
Still confused by Joshua's call, I elegantly lower myself into one of
his posh leather chairs, automatically crossing my right leg over my
left and marvelling at how natural that action has become since my
surgery.
"What's up?" I ask the rich African man.
"I've received a job application from a photographer," Joshua explains.
"Someone who wants to come and work in my studio."
"You must get a hundred portfolios a day," I say. "What's so special
about this one?" With a neutral expression on his face, Joshua slides
the portfolio across the desk to me. I don't even have to open it to see
why Joshua called me in- the name on the front of the folder reads 'Paul
Gould'.
"Ugh," I spit. "He isn't even a fashion photographer! Why's he applied
for a job with you?"
"You know I've been rapidly expanding my business," Joshua explains.
"You and the rest of the Angels have made me very rich, and this has
meant I can look at other kinds of projects, like the artistic kind of
work Paul Gould does. Jamie... His work is good. REALLY good. For the way
he treated you, the way he split up with you..."
"You want to hire him," I whisper. "If he was crap you could just get
rid of him without even having to let me know he applied."
"Who says blondes are dumb?" Joshua says with a sympathetic smile. "If
you say no, then I'll send him away. Like you said, I get a hundred
portfolios a day, I'll no doubt find another one as good as him. But
there aren't any in my current pile."
"Do what you feel best," I say, handing the folder back to Joshua. "Just
as long as I don't have to have any contact with him."
"There are photographs of you in this folder," Joshua says in an almost
disturbingly quiet voice. "He clearly wants to talk to you, to
apologise, maybe."
"He's had well over a year," I spit. "And I've moved on, I'm with Stuart
now."
"I do intend to hire him," Joshua says. "He won't photograph you, or any
of the Angels, but you know that he'll keep trying to contact you."
"...And it'd be awkward getting a restraining order against a colleague,"
I sigh.
"Exactly," Joshua says.
"Okay," I say resignedly. "I'll message him, tell him I want to see him.
But I'll be going with Stuart, and I'll make it very clear it's only
because you asked!"
"Thank you for this," Joshua says warmly. "When I interview him I'll
make it clear that you're strictly off-limits!"
"Hehe, thanks," I say as I leave the office, regretting that I hadn't
been entirely truthful with Joshua. I of course know the old phrase
'hell hath no fury like a woman scorned', and I am very much the woman
scorned. As far as the world is concerned, if I ever see Paul again I'll
perform on him a surgery very similar to the one I had in April, only
with my bare hands. Truthfully, though... I want to hear him out. I NEED
to hear him out. Another phrase I'm familiar with is 'time heals all
wounds', and the wound Paul left me with has had well over a year to
heal.
I actually feel nervous as I type out a message to Paul on my phone,
asking to meet up tomorrow for coffee. When I don't get an immediate
response, I breathe a sigh of relief and head straight to Charlotte's
house, where I head up to my room and change into a light blue halter
neck bikini and my designer sunglasses. I've healed enough that I can
enjoy the cool water of Charlotte's pool, and following today's news, I
have every intention of doing so! After tying my ponytail into a tight
plait, I grab a pair of flip-flops, tie a swishy sarong around my waist
and head downstairs to where Keith is already stretched out on a sun
lounger.
"Hi Jamie!" Keith says.
"Hi," I say with a smile, dropping my sarong & my flip-flops and
allowing the sun to warm every exposed square inch of my body. "Oh, stop
being so squeamish..." I chastise Keith, but when I turn around, the
normally shy boy isn't averting his gaze, but is instead staring
intently at my backside.
"Don't let Charlotte know you're so interested in my arse!" I giggle,
taking off my sunglasses and jumping in the pool.
"Oh, I can look, as long as I don't touch," Keith giggles, rolling over
in the sun lounger to stare at me swimming. "Are you sure you should be
swimming so soon after your operation?"
"It's been three months!" I laugh. "And if I can do what I did in bed
last night with Stuart..."
"Okay," Keith said, rolling back over. "Speaking of, when's he getting
here?"
"I texted him earlier," I say. "He'll be here in a bit. And you're NOT
going inside to play Call of Duty, I have girlfriend privileges I Intend
to exercise!"
"As if we'd do that," Keith chuckles. Sure enough, within ten minutes my
boyfriend arrives and quickly strips down to his swimming shorts before
jumping into the pool, splashing my already-glistening body. I swim over
to Stuart and give him a long kiss, giggling as he dunks us both
underwater, our lips still locked together.
"Brings a new meaning to the phrase 'came up for breath'," Stuart says,
making me laugh even harder.
"I missed you today," I sigh. "REALLY missed you..."
"You know I always miss you when I'm at work," Stuart replies, giving me
another soft kiss. "Is- is everything alright?" I sigh as I'm suddenly
reminded that my boyfriend is as perceptive as he is sexy.
"It can wait," I giggle, splashing Stuart full in the face with a
handful of water.
We stay in the pool for the next half hour before our 'party' is joined
by Charlotte and Hannah, both of whom have changed into skimpy one-piece
swimsuits.
"Hey," I say, climbing out of the pool and drying myself off. "Good
shoot today?"
"We were wearing football kits, there's not much to day about that
really," Charlotte sighs, slowing lowering herself into her pool.
"Ooh, which team?" Keith asks.
"Really, Keith?" Stuart joke. "Not paying attention to your girlfriend's
work?"
"She said 'a shoot for a sports company'," Keith laughs. "Never said
anything about it being football!"
"It was Arsenal," Hannah giggles, joining Charlotte in the pool.
"Oh, well never mind then," Keith chuckles.
"I need to get the smell of chlorine out of my hair," I laugh. "Gonna
hit the shower for a bit."
"Me too," Stuart says a little TOO hastily. "Um, for the, um, chlorine I
mean, um-"
"Oh, just go!" Hannah orders, making everyone- myself and Stuart
included- giggle as we skip up to my en-suite hand-in-hand. It doesn't
take long for us to free each other of our swimwear and, with our lips
locked in a passionate clinch, jump under the hot, running water of my
shower. Once we're both sufficiently 'steamy', I sink to my knees and
press my lips into Stuart's crotch. I'm actually surprised when I find
his clitoris there instead of a penis- every time I've been on my knees
in this shower before, I've had Paul Gould's penis in my mouth, and the
thought of him brought back an old 'instinct' I haven't had in over a
year. Keeping my lips on Stuart's clitoris, I lock my eyes with his and
suck its entire length between my lips, smiling as Stuart yells with
ecstasy. I make a point of swallowing- even though, obviously, I don't
have any ejaculate in my mouth- and give Stuart a long, deep kiss as we
wash the smell of the pool- and the smell of sex- off of our bodies.
"Okay," Stuart gasps as he puts his shorts back on. "That was
officially the best shower I've ever had!"
"Glad you approve," I giggle, pulling on a tiny pale pink bikini. "Stu...
We need to talk."
"Oh what?" Stuart asks exasperatedly. "I'm getting the 'we need to talk'
immediately after sex?"
"I'm not breaking up with you!" I giggle. "And what we need to talk
about... Well, it really wouldn't have gone down well BEFORE sex."
"What is it?" Stuart asks. I take a deep breath and sit down on the edge
of my bed, gesturing for Stuart to join me, before I begin.
"This is such a bad idea..." I moan. "Joshua... Joshua's given a job to Paul
Gould."
"What, that skinny bastard you used to go out with?" Stuart asks.
"Yeah," I nod. "You know how he's been messaging me since I had my
operation, right? Well, um..."
"You want closure," Stuart says, gently squeezing my manicured hand.
"Exactly," I say. "And I want you to come."
"Good," Stuart chuckles. "That saves me the awkwardness of trying to
invite myself along..." I giggle as Stuart gives me a quick cuddle before
we head back downstairs, spending the rest of the day in the warm July
sun.
Stuart and I head to bed just after 10pm, leaving the still-thriving
party (Jonathan, Viks & Krystie all arrived just after 5pm) in favour of
an early night. As I strip naked for bed, I check my phone, only to
discover a message from Paul in amongst the notifications that I'd
planned on ignoring.
'Hey Jamie,' Paul's message reads with a smiley. 'Long time no talk.
Would love to meet up. 11am tomorrow at that coffee shop on the corner
near my flat good for you?'
'Yep,' I reply, before switching my phone to silent for the night and
tossing it in my laundry basket, where the noise from the vibrations
should hopefully be muffled.
"Was that Paul?" Stuart asks cautiously, removing all his clothes and
climbing under the bed sheets.
"'Was' being the word," I giggle, cuddling my naked body up against my
boyfriend's. Even though we're both naked and the atmosphere in the room
is hot, we don't indulge in any sexual activities, choosing instead to
cuddle each other to sleep.
It's Stuart's phone that's wakes us on the mild Thursday morning at 9am-
my own phone still being buried under a pile of clothes. After
showering, I apply a moderate layer of make-up and pull on a light,
stretchy white bodysuit with short sleeves, followed by an ankle-length
blue sundress and cork wedges with a 2" heel. Even though I'm dressed as
casually as possible- not even tying my hair up- Stuart still gives me a
cuddle as I try to grab my sunglasses and my handbag!
Once we're both ready- both mentally and physically- we head down to
Stuart's car.
"Do you know what you're going to say to him?" Stuart asks me.
"I'm just going to listen to begin with," I reply. "I'll hear him out,
then tell him to [f**k] off out of my life." Stuart nods, but remains
silent as we approach our destination. As we enter the coffee shop Paul
waves, having immediately spotted me. Instinctively, I grab Stuart's
hand, intertwining our fingers as we walk toward his table.
"I got us drinks," Paul says cautiously. "Double mocha, your favourite,
right?"
"This is Stuart Milton, my boyfriend," I say, taking a seat opposite my
ex.
"Hi," Stuart says quietly, shaking Paul's hand.
"Oh yes," Paul says. "The 'anti-Jamie'." I can't help but wince as I
feel Stuart seethe next to me.
"Actually," Stuart says, snaking an arm around my waist, "I'm very PRO-
Jamie." I giggle a little as Stuart gently tickles my ribs- I'm
EXTREMELY ticklish- and effortlessly deflects Paul's insult.
"Okay," Paul says, clearly uncomfortable with Stuart's presence. "What I
wanted to say, Jamie... Was that I'm sorry." I pause, expecting more from
the uncomfortable young man.
"...That's all you have to say after a year?" I ask.
"I know it sounds lame," Paul confesses. "But I really have no excuse.
I was selfish, I was stupid, I let the best thing I ever had in my life
slip through my fingers."
"You didn't let her 'slip through your fingers'," Stuart sneers. "You
discarded her."
"Thanks," I say sarcastically, feeling a little put out that my own
boyfriend would compare me- however unwittingly- to a piece of garbage.
"I just want to know if there's a chance that we could be friends," Paul
says. "Especially now that I'm working for Joshua..."
"Exactly why did you apply for a job with him, anyway?" I ask. "You were
doing alright beforehand, it's a completely different style of
photography from what you're used to-"
"You applied to be closer to Jamie, didn't you?" Stuart asks,
interrupting me and irritating me for the second time in under a minute.
"I'd be lying if I said that WASN'T part of the reason," Paul says,
making Stuart shift uncomfortably in his chair.
"You're not afraid it'll make you seem like 'less of a man' to your
friends?" I ask, smirking as Paul squirms under the question.
"Well, um, now that you have a vagina..." Paul begins.
"A vagina you're never going to as much as see," I say smugly.
"And a vagina that's never going to have a penis anywhere near it," Paul
spits at Stuart, who is barely containing his anger.
"If I wasn't blissfully happy with Stuart, I wouldn't be with him," I
say, gripping Stuart's hand and calming him down.
"If you insist," Paul says. "I'll be honest, when I asked to meet you...
There was a part of me that did hope there was another chance for us."
"Not. Going. To. Happen," I say firmly, finishing my coffee. "I can work
with you professionally, but that's it."
"Fine," Paul says as the three of us get up and prepare to leave. "I
guess I'll have to settle for being the only guy with whom you had
unprotected sex." I feel Stuart seethe beside me as Paul mentions our
most intimate moments.
"I mean," Paul laughs. "With your current boyfriend it's not like
there's anything that needs protecting, am I right?" The next few
seconds pass in a blur as Stuart whirls round to face Paul and I hear
the unmistakable sound of flesh meeting flesh HARD. Before I have the
chance to register what's happened, Paul has slumped to the floor in
agony, clutching his left eye, and Stuart is stood over him, looking
almost like he's in a trance.
"STU!" I yell angrily. "What the hell did you do!?"
"Umm..." Stuart says, leaning heavily on the counter.
"Get out!" I say angrily, crouching beside the stricken young man.
Silently, almost in a state of shock, Stuart leaves, getting in his car
and driving away.
"Are you okay?" I ask Paul, who still hasn't got back to his feet. "Can
I get a glass of water, or some ice, or something?" I yell to the
shocked baristas.
"Ugh," Paul says, "so you prefer violent hooligans now?"
"He's not like that," I say defensively. "Not really... Not normally..."
"Tell that to my eye," Paul says, taking his hand away and revealing the
bruised, swollen flesh around it. "How does he hit that hard? His hands
aren't any bigger than yours..."
"He's had eight years of flooding his veins with testosterone," I
explain. "And what you said really, really sucked."
"Oh come on," Paul says, grabbing a cold can of Coke and holding it to
his eye.
"No, I won't 'come on'," I say. "You know I've not exactly had it easy,
I've had my fair share of transphobia directed at me. Well, you WOULD
know it anyway, if you didn't ditch me like a bad smell immediately
after I publicly came out."
"Yeah," Paul sighs.
"Frankly, if it wasn't for the oestrogen correcting my brain, I'D
probably have punched you," I giggle, making Paul smile wearily. "It was
a mistake bringing him along..."
"We've both made mistakes," Paul concedes. "Asking to see you again...
Well, that WASN'T one of them, despite this!" Paul points at his
darkening eye, making us both laugh. "And we did have good times, didn't
we?"
"We had some great times," I say. "But they're in the past, and that's
where they should stay." I gulp before asking my next question. "Did-
did you start seeing anyone after we split up?"
"I went on dates," Paul confesses. "Saw a couple of girls for a few
weeks, nothing serious. You're still the longest relationship I've ever
had."
"Same here," I sigh.
"How long have you been seeing Ronda Rousey there?" Paul asks.
"HIS name is Stuart," I reply defensively. "And to answer your question,
three months, since just after my surgery, though I've known him well
over a year. We met at Dr. Phillips's office."
"Didn't realise she ran a transsexual dating agency as well," Paul
jokes, finally getting back to his feet and walking outside with my
support.
"No, nothing like that," I giggle. "We were both there for appointments,
we got chatting, became friends... We dated briefly but both agreed it
wouldn't go anywhere. He also dated Krystie for a bit."
"What changed your mind that made you date him again?" Paul asks.
"Because he's one of the best friends I've ever had," I sigh. "He's a
great listener, he's sweet, sensitive..."
"...He has a mean right hook," Paul laughs.
"He's everything I could want in a man," I say dreamily.
"'Everything'?" Paul asks.
"Nobody's perfect," I say with a smile. "God knows you proved that. And
it's not like I was 'everything' you looked for in a woman..."
"Yeah, but you are now," Paul says, taking hold of my hand.
"And Stuart will be 'everything' soon," I reply, pulling my hand free of
Paul's grip.
"You really, truly are happy with him, aren't you?" Paul asks.
"I am," I confess.
"Okay," Paul concedes with a sigh. "Just... We could've been perfect."
"Life's too short to waste on 'could've's," I giggle, before giving Paul
a quick kiss on the cheek. "See you at work?"
"Yep," Paul says, smiling his most beautiful smile at me before driving
away.
I get a taxi back home- to my parents' house- where I collapse on the
sofa, sighing frustratedly. I was meant to see Paul, say my piece and
then he'd piss off... Instead I've just been reminded of why I liked him
so much in the first place.
"Hi Jamie!" Mum calls from the kitchen. "You're home early, is Stuart
with you?"
"No," I moan.
"Oh no," mum says. "Have you broken up?"
"No," I reply, catching myself before adding 'not yet' to the end of my
sentence.
"Good," mum says. "Last thing you need right now is a broken heart."
"I saw Paul earlier," I confess. "Paul Gould, my ex-boyfriend."
"Oh," mum says stoically. "What did he want?"
"It's more what I wanted than what he wanted..." I say. "He's been bugging
me since my operation, sending me the occasional message, and now he's
got a job with Joshua, so I thought I'd go along, clear the air and
finally move on."
"And what happened?" Mum asks, sitting down next to me.
"Paul wound Stuart up, Stuart decked him," I say, making mum giggle
slightly.
"What?" I ask.
"'Guys fighting over you'..." Mum teases.
"It's not funny, AND it's not flattering," I retort. "Glad I got out of
the whole stupid gender."
"Are you mad at Stuart?" Mum asks.
"Yes," I sigh. "No. A little. Maybe. I don't know! What he did was
moronic, but at the same time... I can't really blame him for what he
did."
"Have you spoken to Stuart yet?" Mum asks.
"Not yet," I reply. "Had enough of MEN for today."
"What do you want to do, right now?" Mum asks, giggling at my outburst.
"I... I just want to have a girls night," I sigh. "But I can't even have
one of those, we might get called away at any second for Mary..." Mum then
leans into me and gives me a long, motherly hug- which is probably the
thing I need most right now.
"Life's not easy," mum sighs. "Even when you're rich and famous like
you! Get in touch with the girls, see if any of them are free, we'll
have a girls night here. And if Mary goes into labour, I'll drive you
all to the hospital in that pink cab of yours."
"Thanks," I say with a grin.
"Now go on!" Mum teases. "It's about the only time I'll ever tell you to
fiddle with your phone, make the most of it!" I giggle as I compose a
message to the Angels inviting them all round for a night in, much like
we had before Charlotte's reconciliation with the group. I take a slight
liberty in that I also invite Adeola and Becca- despite me being angry
at her brother- and also Nikki & her girlfriend, despite them being
under eighteen, as I figure the more girls I'm around, the more likely I
am to calm down about my boy problems.
Sure enough, that evening, I'm sat in my living room laughing and
giggling with six other girls. Charlotte had plans with Keith and Viks
had already agreed to spend the time with her family- and Mary is
obviously unable to come- but Krystie, Hannah, Adeola, Becca, Nikki and
Sarah are all present, drinking wine (or fruit juice in the case of the
seventeen year olds) and deconstructing the male gender one macho idiot
at a time.
"...And that," I say, addressing Becca, "is why your brother is a total
jerk."
"No argument here!" The 19 year old girl giggles. "Him, Kennedy and
Riley are probably at home playing videogames. And that's why YOUR
brother is a total jerk!" Becca jokes at Krystie, who doubles over in a
fit of giggles.
"I'm so glad my boyfriend turned out to really be a girl all along,"
Sarah says, giving Nikki a tight cuddle.
"You're so glad your GIRLFRIEND turned out to really be a girl all
along," Nikki giggles.
"You are, of course, going to forgive Stuart, right?" Hannah says in my
direction, making me sigh and giggle at the same time.
"Of course, yes," I say. "He may be an idiot at times but no one makes
me smile like he does."
"I don't need to hear any more!" Becca says urgently, making the whole
room giggle.
"Okay," Krystie says. "No more talk of BOYS!"
"I can drink to that!" I say, eliciting another mass giggle.
"So," Hannah says. "Where's everyone off on holiday this year? Somewhere
hot and sunny, I take it?"
"Of course," Becca says with a grin. "Okay, it's with my parents, but
it's still a week in Tenerife!"
"I'm off to LA with my mum at the end of the month," Sarah says.
"Yeah, I remembering her saying," I say. "I still can't believe your mum
is my counsellor, I mean, how much of a coincidence?"
"I still can't believe your mum finally gave consent for me to come with
you on holiday and I go and get a job that means I can't go!" Nikki
jokes, earning another hug from Sarah.
"Speaking of your job, Nikki?" Hannah asks, making the teenaged T-girl
roll her eyes and check her phone.
"Still nothing," Nikki replies. "This baby might get born at some point
before Christmas..."
"Well if she was born at Christmas, her mum's certainly got the right
name for it!" Adeola jokes, eliciting a mass giggle.
"Yeah, except our Mary is most definitely NOT a virgin!" Krystie laughs.
"Well yes, but is anyone else in this room?" Hannah asks, eliciting a
lot of guilty looks followed by a lot of loud giggles.
"Let she who is without sin..." Sarah jokes.
"There's one thing I've ALWAYS wanted to know," Hannah asks, her
inebriation beginning to show. "What's better: sex as a boy or sex as a
girl?"
"Why are you looking at me?" I ask, feeling plenty tipsy myself.
"Well, um, you know..." Hannah stutters awkwardly.
"What makes you think I ever had sex as a boy?" I ask, eliciting shocked
gasps from those present.
"And I'm technically a minor so I refuse to answer!" Nikki laughs.
"The SECOND you turn eighteen I'm asking again!" Hannah says, almost
shaking from giggling too much. "Now sex WITH a boy vs sex WITH a girl,
THAT I know how to answer!"
"Oh my god," Krystie says excitedly, "I didn't know you swung both ways
too!"
"I have in the past," Hannah says, calming herself a little. "I figured
out what I preferred a long time ago!"
"You're only 21, it couldn't have been that long ago!" Adeola retorts.
"And I thought we meant to be NOT talking about boys?" I remind
everyone.
"'Not boys' it is!" Krystie says with a laugh. "So, Hannah, what was SHE
like?"
"Hot," Hannah replies, downing her drink. "Sexy, but still cuddly... The
fact that we both did gymnastics at school CERTAINLY helped..."
"Mmm," Krystie moans. "I'm not sure Nikki & Sarah should be listening to
this!"
"Give that we're the only actual lesbians in the room, I think we need
to hear more!" Nikki laughs.
The conversation eventually moved on from Hannah's tales of debauchery
to gossip about work, holidays, fashion, Becca & Adeola's fledgling
music career, all topics under the sun that have nothing to do with
anything male! As promised, mum drive the four teenagers home just after
10pm in the 'Angelmobile' (which Hannah arrived in), leaving me alone in
my living room with the two statuesque blonde girls.
"Now that the 'kids' are gone," Krystie says, "You are going to forgive
Stu, right?"
"Okay," I sigh. "I'll text him now. But I'm sleeping alone tonight!"
"Aww," Hannah coos, giving me a tight cuddle. "I was looking forward to
a sleepover..."
"How much have you had to drink?" I ask, making both Hannah and Krystie
giggle uncontrollably.
"You know, Han," Krystie giggles, "we've both snogged AND shared a bed
with Jamie, yet here she is, obsessed with a BOY..."
"Are you suggesting we should, you know, make her jealous?" Hannah asks,
releasing her grip on me and sliding next to Krystie.
"Now how, pray tell, should we do that?" The very drunk Krystie asks,
making Hannah giggle loudly and pace a long, sloppy kiss on her lips.
"Oh stop that," I joke as I fire off a text to Stuart, asking if he's
okay and to meet up the following morning.
"We are SO having a sleepover," Hannah giggles, grabbing Krystie's hand
and heading upstairs.
"Not in my bed you aren't!" I laugh.
"Just try and stop us!" Krystie giggles as they head up to my bedroom
and slam the door. Almost immediately, I start to hear the sound of
bedsprings bouncing up and down, accompanied by uncontrollable giggling.
"If you break it, you bought it," I shout upstairs, making the two
excitable girls laugh even louder. Before I can stop them, an alert on
my phone draws my attention to a new text message from my boyfriend.
'Hi Jamie,' the message reads. 'Feeling really embarrassed about today,
don't know what came over me but hearing that smug prick laugh at me... I
lost control, and I am deeply sorry. I'm busy all morning with work but
can meet up for lunch. Love you xxx.' I smile at Stuart's contrition and
return to the sensitive boy I know and love, and compose a reply.
'Love you too xxxx,' I reply. 'See you for lunch! Xxxx' Before I head
upstairs to try to prevent Hannah & Krystie from destroying my bed, I
twirl my phone in my hands, eventually deciding to compose a text
message to my ex-boyfriend.
'Hey Paul,' I type. 'Really, really sorry about what happened today...
Are you okay?' I put my phone away and prepare to head upstairs when I
get an immediately reply to my text.
'Felt better,' Paul replies. 'Still bruised & a little swollen.
Surprised you texted me tbh.'
'Feeling a little guilty,' I reply. 'Anyway I can make it up to you?
Without any other physical contact, I mean.'
'Lol,' Paul almost immediately texts back. 'YOU have nothing to feel
guilty about, your arsehole boyfriend, on the other hand...' I roll my
eyes and quickly compose another text message.
'Do you want to get a coffee tomorrow morning?' I text. 'It'll be just
me this time, I promise!'
'Sure,' Paul texts. 'Probably best if we don't go to the same coffee
shop as today, but there's a Costa just down the road from there.'
'I know the place,' I reply. 'See you tomorrow!' I put my phone back in
my bag and head upstairs to my bedroom, where the two girls' giggles
have quickly become shrieking laughter. As I enter the room, I'm
immediately bombarded with every pillow from my bed, which I eagerly
throw back at the two drunk girls! Our 'pillow fight' doesn't last long,
however, before the three of us collapse, exhausted, onto my bed,
quickly falling asleep in the summer warmth.
"Oww," Hannah moans the following morning as she wakes up, her face in
the direct glare of the sun.
"Your fault!" I giggle, shoving the tall girl off of my bed onto the
floor, wincing slightly at the dull 'thud' with which she hits the deck.
"Oh god," Krystie moans as she wakes up. "Why did you let us drink so
much last night?"
"Seriously?" I ask. "You're blaming me?"
"I know, I know," Krystie moans. "Have you got any aspirin? I've got to
be at work in an hour and a half..."
"There's some in the bathroom," I say. "Can you take Hannah with you?
Kinda skipped something last night that I shouldn't have..." I wave my
thick orange tube in the air, making Krystie giggle despite her hangover
as she picks Hannah up off the floor and leaves me to dilate in peace.
After finishing dilating- and the rest of my morning routine- I apply a
moderate layer of make-up and dress in a clean white bra & thong set,
before pulling on a light grey tank top and a ruffled black miniskirt,
finishing my look by tying my hair into a tight ponytail and slipping my
feet into a pair of flip-flops.
"That's much better," Hannah says upon seeing my look for the day. "Free
those awesome legs!"
"Thanks," I say as the three of us hop in the Angelmobile. "Can you drop
me at the Costa near the cinema?"
"Sure," Hannah- our driver- replies.
"Just remember," Krystie giggles. "In the make-up sex, HE has to do all
the hard work!" I giggle back- the girls clearly think I'm meeting up
with Stuart, and there's no reason for them to believe otherwise.
I enter the quiet coffee shop and immediately locate Paul at one of the
tables in the back. Even despite his dark sunglasses, I can still tell
that he has a whopper of a black eye.
"Hey," I say quietly, sitting down and taking a sip of the double mocha
Paul's ordered. "Thanks for meeting with me."
"It's fine," Paul replies. "I know why you're here... And don't worry, I'm
not going to press charges, even though I could, and probably should."
"Thanks," I whisper. "My dad of course thinks that Stuart's a hero..."
"Heh," Paul chuckles. "He really never did like me, did he?"
"The fact that you constantly called him 'Mr Burke' didn't help you
much," I reply. "Really wish I hadn't changed my surname when I started
transitioning, guess it's a bit late to change it back now..."
"Don't want to damage 'Jamie-Lee: the brand'?" Paul asks, making me
giggle and nod. "Understandable. You know I've been keeping up with you,
right? Watching all your TV appearances, reading your magazine columns..."
I giggle at Paul's unashamed 'fanboying'.
"You do know those magazines are mainly intended for women and teenage
girls, right?" I ask.
"You do know they're also published online, right?" Paul asks with a
cute smile. "And I haven't been nicked by operation Yewtree yet, so I
assume I'm okay to keep reading them."
"I really do appreciate it," I say. "I'll admit... I have googled your
name a few times, looking for any projects you might have been involved
with."
"Thanks," Paul says with genuine gratitude. "I am really proud of some
of the recent stuff I've done, kinda why I shot off a portfolio to
Joshua, heh. And yes, I know you're wondering, but any 'special'
projects you and I did in private? All gone. Completely deleted."
"Even the one with the ballet boots?" I ask with a devilish grin.
"ESPECIALLY that one," Paul laughs. "I knew if I watched that one again
I'd probably never be able to delete it so it went first, heh."
"Thanks," I say with a genuine smile, before checking the time on my
phone. "I've got to get going... Promised Stu I'd meet up with him for
lunch."
"Ah, the 'grovelling meal'," Paul giggles. "I should be familiar with
those..."
"You take care, okay?" I say softly at the handsome young man.
"Will do," Paul replies. "See you round, Jamie-Lee." I leave the coffee
shop with a smile on my face- I've loathed Paul for so long that I'd
forgotten just how much he truly did make me smile at times. I hail a
taxi to my next destination- my lunch date with Stuart, and check my
messages on my phone. The first message, however, is deeply unwelcome- a
link to a news article from Charlotte. When I open up the page, I sigh
in frustration, knowing that my lunch date just got a LOT more awkward.
'Fallen Angel: meeting between Jamie-Lee Burke and her ex-boyfriend
leaves the latter with a black eye.' I groan loudly as I read the
article, which details how Stuart and I entered the coffee shop, only
for Stuart to leave on his own and me to leave with Paul a few minutes
later. Naturally, there's a photo of the peck on the cheek I gave him.
"Fuuuuuuuuck," I moan, closing the browser on my phone and dialling
Joshua's number.
"Jamie," Joshua says stoically, as opposed to his usual booming
greeting.
"You read the article, then?" I ask.
"When I told you to meet with Paul Gould, that was not what I had in
mind!" Joshua exclaims. "Please tell me it wasn't you who punched him..."
"No, it was Stuart," I sigh. "I'm on my way to see Stu now, god knows
how he'll react..."
"You just be careful," Joshua advises. "I've got a lot of damage
limitation to do now... Mary has of course chosen Stuart as godfather for
her baby, the papers will have a field day with THAT..."
"I'm sorry, I'm really sorry," I say.
"Don't you worry!" Joshua says, his usual joviality returning to his
voice. "I'll smooth it all over, you won't need to put out an apology.
Just go and have lunch with your boyfriend!"
"Thanks," I say with a smile. I arrive at the small restaurant to meet
Stuart a mere ten minutes later, and I can immediately tell from his
facial expression that he's seen the same article I have.
"Hey," I say cautiously, sitting down opposite my unhappy boyfriend.
"Hi," Stuart says. "So, I'm going to get thrown under the bus then..."
Whilst I obviously sympathise with Stuart, I can't help but feel put out
by his self-pity.
"You broke it, you bought it," I half-joke, shooting Stuart a
sympathetic smile.
"Yes, I know," Stuart sighs. "I just- I just saw red, you know? I'm
really, really sorry that you got dragged into this."
"Heh," I chuckle, my mood improving thanks to Stuart's grovelling. "If
anything I dragged YOU into it!"
"Whatever," Stuart says dismissively. "I'm still the arsehole in this
story... At least we won't have to deal with Paul again, heh. Just hope he
won't press charges..."
"Oh, don't worry, he won't," I say, hoping to cheer up the miserable
young man.
"...How do you know?" Stuart asks suspiciously.
"Shit," I whisper under my breath.
"Did you- did you see him again?" Stuart asks, barely controlling his
anger.
"I don't really see what business it is of yours whether or not I did,"
I say defensively. "It's not like I stop you from seeing any of your
exes."
"This is different," Stuart insists.
"Oh, how exactly?" I ask angrily.
"Well, um," Stuart stutters. "You're in the news! You kissed him, for
crying out loud!"
"Just a peck on the cheek!" I half-shout, inadvertently drawing the
attention of the restaurant. "I was being polite!"
"You were flirting!" Stuart retorts.
"I was not flirting!" I hiss. "I- Let's not do this in here, please?"
Even though we haven't even eaten yet, Stuart nods, leading me outside
to his car. After I sit down in his passenger seat, I continue my
retort, only a lot louder than before.
"I was not flirting!" I shout. "I hadn't seen the guy in over a year, we
used to be intimate, I gave him a peck on the cheek! That's all!"
"Well, I suppose it's better than where you used to kiss him," Stuart
retorts, earning himself a VERY filthy glare.
"Oh, you complete arsehole!" I yell. "You know I've had sexual partners
before, what, am I supposed to claw Krystie's eyes out next time you hug
her?"
"It's different for guys," Stuart argues.
"Oh for fuck's sake!" I shout. "You of all people shouldn't be such a
fucking misogynist!"
"I- I know," Stuart sighs, realising he's crossed a line. "I'm sorry,
but-"
"No buts," I growl. "And not sorry enough!" I open my mouth to argue
further, but am interrupted by my phone ringing.
"Nikki, hi," I say into my phone, trying not to sound too angry at the
young woman. "Save me please from this horrific quote-unquote lunch."
"Action stations!" Nikki says breathlessly, as though she'd been
running.
"Action stations?" I ask. "What do you mean by ac-" My eyes go wide and
I exchange a concerned glance with Stuart.
"Oh, shit!" I breathe into the phone. "Um, uh, which hospital is she in?
Is there anything I can do?"
"Same hospital she was in on Tuesday," Nikki says amidst a lot of
background noise. "May's parents are flying in from Belfast today- can
you pick them up from Gatwick?"
"Can we get to Gatwick to pick up Mary's parents?" I ask Stuart, who
nods and starts his car.
"We'll be there in 45 minutes," Stuart shouts into the phone.
"That's good," Nikki says. "I'll let them know you'll pick them up.
You'll need a lot of boot space. Got to go- see you at the hospital."
"Oh shit," I mouth as Nikki hangs up.
"Calm down!" Stuart laughs. "It's not like you're the one having the
baby!"
"I know, I know, it's just- this is real!" I breathe excitedly.
"It was 'real' the last two times as well," Stuart laughs.
"Oh shut up," I retort as we head toward the airport as fast the city's
speed limits allow.
"Hi," the middle-aged Irish man says as he dumps his bags- including a
HUGE pink teddy bear- in Stuart's boot. "It's Jamie and Stuart, right?"
"Yes, hi Mr Logan," I say politely.
"For god's sake, call me Pete!" The old man insists with a smile. "Hope
I'm not too late..."
"I'm getting updates from Krystie every few minutes," I say as I compose
a text message letting her know that Mary's parents have arrived. "No
progress yet but her waters HAVE broken."
"Then take me to my granddaughter!" Pete insists.
"And, um, your regular daughter, right?" Stuart asks with a chuckle.
"Just go, go!" Pete insists, laughing excitedly with his wife. We arrive
at the hospital just over an hour later, Krystie greeting the four of us
with big hugs.
"She's in the labour ward," Krystie explains breathlessly. "Dan's with
her, but I've not heard anything for a while."
"God, can you imagine if it goes so slow she's born tomorrow?" Mrs Logan
asks. "Daughter of a Northern Irish Catholic born on The Twelfth?"
"I'm sure she'll be out soon," Stuart says, escorting the expectant
grandparents to their seats before slumping down in a chair next to me.
"I'll still mad at you," I say stoically.
"...But there are more important things right now?" Stuart asks, making me
nod and us both giggle.
"...And I'm sorry for being an insensitive, macho, masculine, sexy, hunky
idiot," Stuart grovels, making me giggle even harder.
"Right on all counts," I sigh, resting my head on the hunky idiot's
shoulder. "And you don't need to worry, I'm not going to see Paul again,
well, not outside of work anyway."
"The soo-" Stuart starts, before wisely shutting his mouth. "Never
mind."
"No, go on," I say softly. "You thought better of it, I won't get mad, I
promise."
"I was going to say 'the sooner Joshua forms that girl band so I can
work for him the better'," Stuart says. "But that does kinda make me
sound like a jealous idiot."
"Nah," I giggle. "It'd be great working with you. That way I'd always
have someone to bring me coffee whenever I'm at the office!" Stuart
playfully rolls his eyes, before giving me a long kiss on the forehead.
"Speaking of fetching things for me..."
"You want me to get your dilating kit, right?" Stuart asks.
"Hunky AND perceptive," I giggle, giving Stuart a playful squeeze on the
buttock as he leaves- a gesture that I know he is VERY appreciative of!
With my boyfriend running his errand, I get out of my chair and stroll
over to Krystie, who's staring intently at the hospital's vending
machine.
"I've got change if you're hungry," I say, buying myself a Topic bar.
"No," Krystie sighs. "Just- you know, 'mentally preparing myself for
godmotherhood', heh."
"I know the feeling," I laugh. "I've already bought so many presents for
her, not just for the Christening either..."
"That girl is going to be more spoiled than Prince George, hehe!"
Krystie giggle