Diane, A new beginning
Janet L. Stickney
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Somehow the dress just felt right. I had dreamed of this moment for a
long time, yet I had always been too scared to even try it! That was
the first time I have ever worn women's clothing, and now I know for
sure that it was exactly what was missing in my life. I don't know why
I had dreamed about it, but quite often over the years, in my dreams, I
drew a mental picture of myself as a girl, one that I was sure I could
never achieve.
As I dressed the softness of the underwear, the silky tautness of the
nylons on my legs, the way the skirt flowed around my legs, the aroma
of the makeup and the taste of lipstick mixed with the subtle, cloying
scent of the perfume I had used overwhelmed me. The black high heels I
had on made my legs more shapely, made me stand more upright, arching
my foot as I felt an elation that simply could not be described!
My name is Duane, I'm age 16, and I am, like most teenagers, able to
take things on faith, quite often not knowing that serious consequences
might occur as a result of that faith. It was a sunny Friday afternoon,
and the family had gone to visit my Aunt Helen for the weekend, leaving
me alone in the house for the whole time. For no apparent reason I
walked into my sister Sharon's room and looked around. Sharon was 18,
just a couple of years older than I am. Her room exuded femininity with
pink and white paint, lots of dolls from her childhood, posters of all
kinds, and the smell of her perfume. I had always liked the perfumes
she chose because they smelled so...feminine. All at once I was
overcome with the desire to dress in her clothes, a feeling I had felt,
but had never acted on before. I walked over to the closet and began
looking at the bulging wardrobe, the profusion of colors bursting out
as I opened the door. I'm not husky in any way, but rather, I have a
slender to medium in build, I'm taller than my sister, about 5' 7"
tall, which usually never bothered me, and in this case, would work to
my advantage.
I found, white panties, a white bra, some panty hose, a slip, and put
them on the bed. Out of the closet I took a short, dark green skirt, a
pale green blouse and some black heels. With some unknown force guiding
me, I stripped and began to dress in her clothes, and when I was
dressed in just panties and the bra, I started experimenting with the
makeup I found lying on the vanity. As I dressed and the soft material
caressed my skin my heart quickened, and then, as I looked in the full
length mirror and I saw the girl in my dreams, my heart started
pounding hard, because I had become that very same girl, the unknown
girl in my dreams! I had tried to do something with my hair, but just
could not master it, and simply ended up just brushing it into a
ponytail.
"If you aren't just the prettiest thing!" I recognized the voice of
course, and as I swallowed my tongue, I spun around to see Sharon
standing there. We stood speechless, looking across the room at each
other. I wanted to run and hide, become part of the floor, something
that would take me away from the inquiring stare of my sister.
"I...I...I thought you were going to Aunt Helen's with Mom and Dad!"
"I can see that! I also see that you have very good taste Duane. That's
my favorite outfit!" I was froze to the chair, waiting to see what she
would do next. "Why don't you finish getting dressed and let me see
you?"
I paused, then she held out the pantyhose.
"Go ahead Duane. I'll be back in a few minutes."
She left me standing there with a handful of nylon and a lump in my
throat, but I sat on the bed and pulled them on, then the skirt and
blouse. I had just stepped into the heels when she returned.
"Turn around and let me see you." With apprehension I slowly spun
around on my tiny heels, my skirt flaring, and showing my nicely shaped
legs. "Damned if you don't look terrific Duane! I never would have
guessed that you wanted to dress in women's clothes, or that you could
look so good! You need some help in the makeup department, but
otherwise you look really good!" I stood perfectly still, just standing
there, because I was ashamed to be found dressed like this.
"Gee Sharon, this is the first time I ever dressed like this! Honest! I
don't know why I did it, but I did. Don't tell MOM or DAD...PLEASE!!!
"I won't tell Duane. I think it's kind of neat! I always wanted a
sister, and now I have one!" I heard the words, but at first I wasn't
sure I heard her right! "It's obvious that you need some help, so why
don't you let me be the one to help you? I could see the hair on your
legs right through the nylons Duane! If you want to do this, then why
not do it right?"
"Other than my hair, what else is there?" She did not hesitate to tell
me.
"Like I said, you'll have to shave your legs, so why don't you go in
and take a bath and shave off all of the body hair you can reach, arms,
legs, chest, and include under your arms, and wash your hair, then I'll
help you dress after that." I was full of apprehension, but driven by
an unknown force I did as she asked.
Unlike some brothers and sisters, I trusted Sharon. I knew she wouldn't
make fun of me or my desires, and she had offered to help, so I
stripped off the clothes and did as my sister told me. When I came out
of the bathroom, I was in my robe, and I was as hairless as I could
make myself. The cooler air felt different on my skin, dryer and cooler
than I remembered from a regular shower. Sharon was waiting for me,
holding the white panties for me to slip on. As soon as I was modestly
covered, she took me by the hand and began helping me dress. The bra
was stuffed with a pair of falsies that she had used when she was
younger, then she adjusted the bra straps to fit me better, the
underwire bra cups pulling my chest in just enough to help accent the
illusion that I had boobs.
I rolled the pantyhose up my now bare legs, the sensation of silky
nylon making me almost swoon with pleasure. She held out a panty girdle
for me to slip on, and when I had pulled it up, I could see that I had
a smooth front and no bulge to give me away. Sharon handed me a waist
cincher, but I had never seen one before, so she helped me put it on;
She could see that it gave me a more slender waist and she was sure
that the skirt would fit a lot better. Me? I was gasping for air, which
she ignored. Then she led me to the vanity where she began to apply a
liquid foundation, then a light dusting of translucent powder.
Fortunately we had a very similar skin tone, which she had commented on
before she started. Sharon started the color with a rose and copper eye
shadow, black eyeliner, black mascara that made my lashes longer, and
fuller, then a blusher that highlighted my cheekbones. Sharon took
tweezers to my eyebrows, thinning them just enough to define a feminine
shape, but not enough to make them definitely female in shape. "Now
then, lets get the slip on, and then we'll get the skirt and blouse." I
pulled the half slip to my waist, and Sharon helped me put the skirt
on.
It fit much better than the first time I had it on, since the waist
cincher had done its job quite well. The skirt easily zipped up all the
way, and I had a reasonably good figure. I slipped on the black heels
once again, not teetering at all. Sharon sat me at the vanity once
again and began on my hair. I wore my hair longer since that was the
current style, which was good, because it made it easier for her to
create a feminine hair style for me. Sharon began rolling my still
slightly damp hair in rollers, following a pattern she found in one of
her newest teen magazine, and also trimmed it a little. I was under the
dryer for half an hour or so before she began to take out the rollers
and comb out my hair.
When she was done I had a very nice feminine hairdo. It was combed out
for fullness and it flowed around my lower neck, just above my
shoulders. Sharon trimmed the front so my bangs were not quite so long.
"Why don't you slip on the blouse now, and then we'll get some lipstick
on you." She chose her favorite color, a dark red, and watched as I
applied it with a newfound skill. "Come on Duane. I bet your just
busting to see what you look like now."
I stood, and slowly turned towards the mirror. I was stunned to say the
least! There, before my very eyes, was an attractive girl, one that I
was attracted to, except I was the girl! I was in a state of shock at
the total transformation I had undergone. Sharon's total feminization
of me was superb!
Sharon interrupted my thoughts "While you were in the bath Mom called
to say that they have decided to stay for the rest of the week at Aunt
Helen's. They'll be gone, it's Friday, you're all fixed up, so why
don't we go out tonight?"
"What? Like this?"
"Nobody will ever know that you are not a girl Duane, and yes, I mean
you and I, as sisters out on the town!" I wasn't sure, and gave her my
scared look. "Just look in the mirror again. Tell me what you see. Does
that look anything like a boy to you? I'll just bet that you want to go
out, don't you?" My small grin confirmed it for Sharon and she smiled
at me. "We need a name for you. A female name. I can't call you Duane
all night, somebody would figure out your a boy right away. Got any
ideas?"
I blurted out the name of my dream girl, "Diane," before I realized
what I was saying.
"Okay Diane it is. Now then how about some jewelry for the prettiest
girl on the block." Like most of the guys at school, I had pierced my
ears, so Sharon gave me some long gold dangle type earrings, a matching
necklace and bracelet, then she squirted some of her best perfume on
me.
As we ate dinner, Sharon warned me about some of the things I would
have to watch out for.
"Remember that your name is Diane, and don't panic if some of the guys
look at you. They're just going to be sizing you up. There is no way
for anybody to know that you are not a girl unless you blow it. In the
ladies room, don't stare. Just do your business and get out, but
remember to sit down to pee! I'll give you some of my ID just in case.
Keep your elbows closer to your body, and walk slower with a shorter
stride. I'll be there with you all night, so don't worry, I won't let
anything happened to you." She looked at the clock, then said, "Let's
see what we can do with your nails." Sharon filed and shaped my nails
into a very feminine oval, and then applied a red polish that matched
my lipstick. As Diane, I spent the rest of the time learning how to
walk in the heels, hold a purse, sit, and generally be demure, all the
while trying to overcome my fear.
At 7pm Sharon led me out of the house for my very first night "out"
dressed as a girl. We arrived at Diamonds about half an hour later. I
felt like my knees were shaking so bad that I might not be able to
walk, but at my sisters urging, I went into the club, right beside her.
We found a table, and Sharon had made me order my own drink.
"You can't be a mute dear, might as well learn now as later."
It wasn't long before the both of us had young men at our elbow wanting
to dance.
"Ah come on Diane, let it go. Don't be so uptight."
Sharon told the guys that we would love to dance, and I found myself
out on the dance floor being held closely by the young man. "I'm Greg.
I haven't seen you here before, what's your name?"
"I'm Diane Guzaki, and yes, this is my first time here." The music
ended and Greg led me back to the table where Sharon and her friend
Jeff were already seated. After the introductions all around, Jeff
asked me "where are you from Diane" and before I could answer, Sharon
spoke up.
"She's my cousin from Gaylord, she's staying with me for a few days, so
don't get your hopes up." The evening passed quickly for me, and when
the good-byes were over Sharon and I went home.
"Well now Diane, how was the evening? I couldn't help but notice that
you and Greg were pretty chummy during the last dance!"
"I was tired! That's all!"
"If you say so hon'. Let's get ready for bed, I'm beat. See you in the
morning."
I went to my room and undressed, with the events of the evening racing
through my mind. The excitement of being dressed was one thing, but to
be accepted as a girl by everyone I met was another thing all together!
I slipped into bed, and quickly dropped off to sleep.
"Come on sleepy head, get out of bed." I awoke to find Sharon gently
shaking me. After I took care of my morning needs I went down to the
kitchen to find Sharon cooking breakfast. "Eat good this morning Diane,
we have a big day ahead of us." Her use of my new name was music to my
ears, but the "big day" stuff sounded ominous! I helped her clean up
the kitchen, and then we went to Sharon's room.
"Look Diane, we have the whole weekend free, and are off all next week
for term break, and Mom and Dad are gone, so why don't you let me use
this time to improve your feminine skills? This will be the best time
for you, since we have so much time on our hands."
I knew she was right, and in a moment of desire over riding my common
sense, I nodded my agreement. Sharon began setting out what I would
wear. Light blue panties and bra set, nude pantyhose, the cincher and
panty girdle I wore the night before, a simple white blouse and a pair
of her jeans. The shoes were brown loafers. She had me start with a
shower and a very close shave, although I only shaved three times a
week as it was.
After my shower Sharon had me dust well with powder, giving my skin a
silky feeling.
"Come on Diane, shake a leg! We've got a lot of shopping to do. I think
it's going to be a long day."
When she was dressed, Sharon came in and did my hair once again. I was
wearing some of my own jeans, but they were a pair of smaller ones that
fit tight. A loose blouse and my own brown loafers completed my
ensemble. We got the car and headed for the mall. I felt comfortable
because nobody took me for what I really was. The very first store that
we went into was a lingerie shop well known for the sexy style of
clothes they sold there. When I left the store I was well outfitted,
with several pairs of panties, with matching bras, and some very well
made breast forms that were an exact match for my skin tone. I also got
two corsets that Sharon insisted that I try on. They were, in a word,
tight! I resisted, but ended up wearing one of the corsets out of the
store, with Sharon telling me I would need it later on.
By the time lunch had rolled around, I had a very respectable wardrobe
all of my own, and Sharon told me we were just getting started! We
strolled into a small but popular dress shop that carried mostly
cocktail and prom type dresses. I browsed in the racks and found a
"skimmer" type cocktail dress that was fire engine red, low cut, and
had thin straps to hold it up. In my excitement, I blurted out
"Sharon, I just have to try this on! It's perfect!" Taking the dress
into the changing room, I quickly stripped off the jeans and the blouse
and put the dress on. When I walked out so that Sharon could see it,
Sharon and several of the other women there smiled at the way the dress
fit me, nodding that I should buy it. Hugging my breasts, showing fake,
but alluring cleavage, then fitted across the midriff, and ended by
flowing out across the slightly flared hips to end 3 inches above the
knee.
"Honey," said a woman standing there, "If you don't buy that dress,
your crazy!" Sharon merely smiled and said,
"I guess you know the answer Diane, buy it!" Changing back to jeans,
Sharon and I headed for home.
"I never guessed that shopping would be so much fun Sharon. I thought I
was more like Dad I guess, but now, wow!!"
"Now you know that reason women like to shop kiddo. Let's relax a bit,
and I'll help you put those clothes away."
We both retired to our rooms and took a short nap. Sharon went to her
room, thinking about her newly feminized brother. She didn't know why,
but the thought of her brother in dresses excited her, and she felt no
shame in helping me realize my dream girl. In fact, she was very
truthful when she told me that she was looking forward to having a
sister! Back in my room, I was dreaming once again of the girl in the
mirror, the one with the red dress of course.
Later, after our short nap, we had a light snack.
"Should I ask if you want to go out again tonight Diane?"
Of course no answer was required! We both went up to get ready for the
evening. I once again took a long hot bubble bath, and shaved every
part of my body I could reach. After I had patted dry as Sharon told me
to do, I dusted myself all over with the sweet smelling powder. I
slipped on a pair of the new high cut panties, red of course.
"HEY SHARON! Come in here and help me with this corset again please."
"Hold on Diane, I'll be there in a sec." Sharon came in shortly, and
began to help with the corset. "Hold your arms up in the air Diane, and
take a deep breath." I did as I was told, and when Sharon was done
hooking the hooks and lacing the laces and I let my arms down I blurted
out, "Holy cow Sharon, I got tits!" It was true. The corset had pushed
all of the excess flesh up and into the cups of the built in bra!
After I had put on the red bra and inserted the new breast forms, I
could see that my own my boobs lay in the cups of the bra, and were
terrifically accented by the small falsies. They looked soft and
exciting. "Sit down at the vanity while I work on your eyebrows."
Sharon worked thinning them even more than she did the first time. When
she was done, I had a high feminine arch to my eyebrows.
"Now you finish your make up Diane, and I'll finish dressing and them
come and help you zip up."
I sat down and began my make up with a light foundation that perfectly
matched my skin tone, then I picked a dusty rose eye shadow as the
primary color, accented with a shimmering copper highlight. I drew the
black eyeliner on my eyelids with a skill that came from a newly found
desire, not experience. The black mascara lengthened my lashes and
added some of the fullness to them that I lacked. A coral blusher for
highlight on my cheekbones completed my makeup until I finished
dressing.
"Sharon! Are you free yet?"
"Coming, almost ready."
When Sharon stepped into the room, then she gaped at me, her little
"brother". I guess I was a stunner! Even without the dress! She grabbed
the dress and helped me slip it on, then zipped it up. The corset had
reduced my waistline a great deal and the dress fit like it was a
second skin! Sharon had me sit down at the vanity, then she brushed my
bangs out and curled them a little with a curling iron. She used the
rollers to give me the curly hairdo I had the night before.
"Sit here and watch television or something Diane, I have to do my own
hair, and when I'm done I'll come brush yours out."
About 30 minutes later Sharon came in and began to take the rollers out
and brush my hair out. My hair was puffed, teased, and set into a
shorter bob that was curly and quite saucy.
"Now some lip liner and lipstick Diane. You saw me do it yesterday, you
try it."
I took the liner brush and traced my lips into a petulant bow and then
filled in with a bright red lipstick. Sharon squirted me with some of
her perfume.
"Slip on your red shoes, the pair that match one of my purses." In
seconds, I was completely dressed and ready for the evening.
Sharon was dressed in a fashion similar to me. She wore a bright green
dress that just made it to the middle of her thigh, and was also held
up by two thin straps like mine. Black patent leather shoes and purse
completed her outfit.
"Lets go girl! I can hardly wait to see those guys go gaga when you
walk in."
Sharon and I got the car, and headed for town. We decided to go to a
new place in town called Tuxes. It catered to the college crowd, and
was a bit more upscale than Diamonds was. We walked in and the waiter
found us a table on the lower mezzanine just where we could see, and
better yet, be seen. It wasn't long before we once again had several
guys at their table asking us to dance. Sharon prodded me a little, and
a handsome young college student named Larry Stiles quickly escorted me
to the dance floor.
We danced a few faster dances, and Sharon caught my eye and motioned
that she could clearly see my bright red panties when my skirt flared
out, so I made an effort to be more careful. A slow dance came on and
he held me close and tight. I fought against it for a moment, then gave
in to the overwhelmingly feminine feelings that overcame me. After the
dance, Larry took me to the outdoor balcony where he suddenly scooped
me into his arms and kissed me! I again started to struggle, but soon
found myself giving in to his very masculine demands. He and I stayed
out there for a while, and then went back to my table.
"Will you gentlemen excuse us. Be back in a minute." Sharon took the
lead and I followed her to the ladies room. "You better fix your
lipstick Diane, kind of smeary there!" As I redid my lipstick, Sharon
continued, "Bill wants to go for a ride later on. Down by the beach I
think. If we decide to go you'll have to be very careful that Larry
doesn't find something that girls don't have! Got it? If I could see
those red panties of yours, so could everyone else, and red is almost
as good as black in turning guys on!"
"Oooh Yah, I got it! But Larry is kind of cute isn't he? I didn't
really intend to kiss me Sharon, it just happened!"
"I understand Diane, I really do, but be careful later on, okay?" We
left and went back to the table, to the anxiously waiting guys.
As Sharon had predicted, the guys drove down to the beach, where, as
couples, we each went our separate ways. Larry led me to a secluded
part of the beach, stopping under a big tree. Being new at this "girl"
stuff, I almost got myself into trouble a few times, but I managed to
keep Larry's hands away from the one area that would give me away.
Larry did manage to feel my "breasts", once, through my dress, but I
quickly discouraged him, and I prevented any further action in that
area. After a while we just talked, and I found out that Larry was from
Gaylord, the same place my Aunt Helen lived! I had told him that Helen
was my Mother since she was supposedly from out of town, and knew I had
made a mistake and had put myself in a pickle, but didn't know what to
do, so I tried to ignore it. After a while, Sharon, with Bill in tow,
came by and took me away from Larry's clutches. The guys took us home,
and as a group we walked to the front porch.
"We had a real fun time guys, maybe we can do it again real soon.
Goodnight." I gave Larry a peck on the cheek and went in the house.
"Boy! You sure knocked'em dead tonight Diane! I never in my whole life
would have dreamed that you liked to wear women's clothes, or that you
could look so good in them either! You took to those clothes like you
have been wearing them all your life. And the guys! You sure that this
is the first time that you've ever been dressed as a girl?"
"I swear to you Sharon, yesterday was the first time in my life I ever
wore women's clothes. And besides, you were the one to suggest that we
go with them to the beach, what could I do but play out my role as a
girl!"
"Okay, Okay. I kind of wanted to see how you would react is all. Don't
get your tits in an uproar. We'll talk again tomorrow morning, I'll see
you then, good night Diane."
The next morning I found myself the first one up, it was around 10am,
so I started some coffee. Sharon came down about half an hour later.
When we looked at each other, we both began to laugh and giggle.
"Diane, I really had a wonderful time last night. You really had Larry
going! You know of course that he really likes you, and I guess I need
to know if you want to continue dressing as a girl?"
"I don't know Sharon, I found out that I definitely like it that's for
sure, but Dad wouldn't understand, and that's positively a sure thing!"
"I know that silly, but I want to know if you want to spend the week as
Diane, full time, every day. We can have a lot of fun together, and
I'll help you every step of the way." The pleading tone in her voice
told me that she did not want to give up her "new" sister just yet, and
neither, I realized, did I.
"Sure! Sounds like fun." Since the day was Sunday, we lounged around
and then we spent some time in Sharon's room as she let me try on
different skirts, blouses and dresses trying to figure out my "look".
It was a pleasant day for the two of us, as we became a lot closer.
On Monday we both got dressed in shorts and blouses and proceeded to
clean the house from top to bottom. By late after noon everything
glowed with polish and the house smelled of fresh carpets and Lilac air
freshener.
Sharon said, "I'm ready for a long bath and a good dinner Diane, how
about you?"
"Me too! You go first, then I'll take bath while you get dressed."
It wasn't long before the two of us smelled of bath salts and body
talc.
"I'm beat Sharon! Let's just relax, watch television and mellow out
tonight."
"I was hoping that you'd say that. These flannels feel real good right
now!" Sharon and I sat around all evening in our nightgowns and went to
bed rather early.
The next morning I was up and dressed in a skirt and sweater, making
breakfast, when Sharon finally got up.
"Hi Diane. If you don't have any plans for today, lets see if we can
fit you into one of my swimsuits and go to the beach. Okay?"
"That's pretty risky Sharon. I don't have any shape at all unless I pad
almost all over, and all of it floats! I get a very ugly picture here
Sharon."
"Sure that is all true, buy why not try it anyway?" I knew it was just
about the worse place for a boy dressed as a girl to go, but then, if I
could do it there I could do it anywhere.
"Okay, I'll try it, but I go only if we both agree I look okay, deal?"
"Deal."
After breakfast we went to Sharon's room where she pulled out several
of her old swimsuits for me to try on. Sharon held out a green spandex
type suit, took one look and said "nope!" The next one was a dark blue
one with several yellow stripes running on an angle, with a small skirt
attached.
"Try this one on Diane, it looks like it'll fit just fine." I took the
suit and headed for my room, and after quickly stripping down to my
panties, I slipped the suit on.
"You can come in now Sharon." Sharon came in and gave me a very
critical once over.
"Well, the suit fits pretty good, but it looks like you'll need to wear
the cincher under the suit, and it'll fit even better with these," she
handed me the new breast forms we had bought. "Slip them into the suit
and let me see how you look." I did as instructed, and the swimsuit
looked much better. "Pretty good girl! But you'll have to shave your
legs a little higher before we go to the beach though, see you in half
an hour."
She left me standing there in that suit wondering if this was the right
thing to do. Yet as I looked in the mirror, I knew I wanted to at least
try it, so I stripped again and went in to shave my face and trim what
the suit would reveal. I wore the suit under some shorts and a top, my
makeup thin foundation and some eyeliner with lipstick.
In less than an hour we were on our way to the beach, with me sitting
there having very definite butterflies in my stomach.
"I'm really worried about this Sharon, almost all of the kids will be
at the beach today, and when they see you, they'll recognize me for
sure!"
"Settle down Diane. Your my cousin from Gaylord remember? That'll
explain the family resemblance, and besides, nobody will be expecting
you, especially dressed this way. So just settle down and follow my
lead. I won't let anyone bother you, so you just enjoy the day."
I seemed to calm down, so Sharon let it go. When we reached the beach
we walked to a semi secluded spot and settled down onto our blankets.
The afternoon sun was warm, and before long we decided to head to the
water where I found what it's like to swim in a suit with a skirt. Per
Sharon's instructions I did not put my head under water
When we returned to our blankets, we found Larry and Bill waiting for
us!
"Hi Diane. Nice to see you again, do you mind if we join you?"
Sharon and I looked at each other, then told them they could join us.
We spent a very enjoyable afternoon with the guys, and when it was time
to leave, Bill asked Sharon if she and I wanted to go to dinner that
night with them. Once again Sharon and I traded looks, then told them
to come by at 7pm that night, and we were soon on our way home.
"I'm not to sure about all of this dating stuff Sharon, pretty soon
Larry's going to want more than a kiss on the cheek. I like the
dressing and all, but I'm getting concerned all the same."
"I understand Diane. I really do. After tonight, no more dating for
you!" Sharon drove us home as I contemplated the past few days and a
very uncertain future. We both took quick showers, and began to dress.
It seemed like fate that we both chose shirtwaist dresses and simple
flats to wear. I was in bright green and Sharon in a muted blue. Sharon
once again helped me with my hair, and just as we finished dressing the
doorbell rang. The dinner was in a quiet restaurant, and the four of us
enjoyed the Italian dinner. But at the end of the evening when the guys
took us home, I told Larry that I was going back to Gaylord, and ran in
the house.
We both retired to our rooms and went to bed. The next morning it was
Duane that emerged from my room.
"Hi Sharon. I decided to be myself today. I really enjoyed being Diane,
but I'm beginning to wonder if I could lose myself...my male self that
is, and I'm not even sure if I want to be my male self anymore! I...I"
For the first time since I was 10, I cried in front of my sister.
Sharon reached out and took me into her arms, held me and spoke
soothing words to me.
"I understand Duane. I'm well aware of the stress that this has put you
under. I saw it in your eyes yesterday. But you have found a part of
you that you seem to have a need to express, a feminine side, one that
you don't think your friends would understand. I'm a girl for goodness
sake! Your own sister and I don't understand this attraction for girls
clothes you have. But I'll always be here for you, to help you if you
need it, and to love you because you deserve it."
By the end of her little speech, we were both in tears. Just then the
doorbell rang and Sharon answered it. There was a short pause before I
heard her screaming. DUANE! DUANE! I ran to the front room to find
Sharon standing there with a state trooper.
"I'm sorry sir, but there has been an accident. A very serious
accident. Could you both come down to the station with me?"
The trooper was very polite, but I could see that he was quite serious
in his request, and I just knew that my parents had been killed or
seriously hurt.
"Sure. Just give us a moment." I took Sharon in my arms and held her
tight. "You know that we have to go with him Sharon. I'll drive. I took
her car keys and we left, following the trooper. The news was bad. Both
of our parents had been killed by a drunk driver. The drunk of course,
was not hurt in the least. And then we found out that this was not the
first time the guy who had killed our parents had hurt someone while
driving drunk.
Alone now, we went home to cry and mourn our loss even as we wondered
what would happen next. Sharon was legally an adult, but I wasn't. What
would happen to us? Unable to be apart, we held each other until we
finally fell asleep. Our Aunt Helen came down the next day with the
bodies, and helped us prepare for the funerals. It was several weeks
before we had settled all of our parent's affairs and with the
insurance company. Then all of my escapades came to roost.
"You know, I've had some very strange phone calls in the last few
weeks. It seems that I now have a daughter. A daughter named Diane."
Helen turned to Sharon, "It seems she stayed with you for a few weeks
over term break. Since I have no children let alone a daughter, I want
to know who is, or was," she turned and looked directly at me, "Diane?"
Sharon and I quickly looked at each other, but before we could speak,
Aunt Helen spoke again. "It was you wasn't it Duane? You are the
mystery girl Diane." I felt my mouth drop open, confirming her guess.
"I got a call from a Mrs. Stiles, a member of my church, who happens
to have a grandson named Larry. She told me that he called and raved on
and on about a girl he had met, and she was from Gaylord! This girl
said her Mother was Helen Guzaki. Now really kids! How many Guzaki's do
you think there are in Gaylord? Now, I want one of you to tell me the
truth." When Sharon sneaked a look at me, it only confirmed her
suspicions, and knew at once. "Tell me the truth, it was you wasn't it
Duane."
I stood there, my head downcast, but finally, looked up and said "yes
Ma'am." In a very soft tone of voice, Helen asked us to explain.
Sharon and I began the tale, and when we were finished, she merely sat
there.
"You are both out of school at the end of this term, Duane at least for
the summer, and you both now have more than enough money to go to
school anywhere that you want, but...but, I'd like Sharon and DIANE to
come and spend the summer with me before the start of the new school
year."
She looked right at me when she spoke, but it was Sharon that spoke
first.
"That's great! We've had a lot of fun in the last few days!" Looking
right at me, Sharon said to me, "You know you want to! Say you'll be
Diane for the summer!"
Of course, I really wanted to do it, but I was afraid to say so, at
least right then. "I'll think about it." But Sharon saw the look in my
eyes and knew I would be Diane again.
It seemed that I had found myself in one of those predicaments that
come from leaping without looking!
"Since you have decided to get in touch with your feminine side, I
think that we, Sharon and I, should help you."
Then, Helen began to outline what she thought they should do to help me
realize my feminine self.
"Since you rashly told someone that you were my daughter, I think that
you should become my daughter! So, from now on, you'll dress and behave
as Diane. I'll help you with poise, mannerisms, walk and so on. When we
leave for Gaylord, you'll have nothing but Diane's clothes with you,
and that's how you'll dress, for at least the summer."
I was happy, and yet scared about what was in store for me.
The rest of the school year went by quickly, but Sharon was the first
to notice that I had not cut my hair once since the beginning of the
term. She teased me about it once in a while, but she and Helen never
pushed me to dress as Diane. Up to now, Helen had not yet seen me as
Diane, so on the very last day of school, when nobody was home, I made
my decision right then. Since I was home alone, I went to upstairs and
took a very long bath, shaved very carefully, and once again got
dressed as Diane.
I took time picking out my clothes. Blue panties, a lace trimmed white
underwire bra, some nude pantyhose, the cincher and panty girdle. I
chose the light blue shirtwaist dress, white heels and a necklace of
white beads with a white bracelet. It was all laid out on the bed
before I started dressing. I slipped on the panties, and once again
felt the thrill of desire course through me. I quickly continued
dressing, and when I was ready I went to the vanity and began my
makeup. Even though I had not put on makeup more than six times in my
life, I did an even better job than Sharon did on me! I simply brushed
out my now longer hair, fluffed it up and used a curling iron in a few
selected places. A dab of perfume, the jewelry, and I was done. The
shoes slipped on my feet easily, and I found myself heading for the
stairs without a thought.
Helen had come home from the grocery store, and when she heard the
steps on the stairway she turned around.
"Oh my god! You're Diane? Is this my newest daughter?"
"Yes ma'am. I'm Diane, and, I intend to stay this way for as long as
you'll let me. Since I discovered Diane, I've felt that this was the
real me. I also intend to be the best daughter that you've ever had!"
"Duane, I mean Diane, of course you'll be the best daughter I ever had.
And you can stay Diane for as long as you want. With one provision. You
must always do your best. No clownish looking dressing, no part way
dressing, and my daughters, both of them, will be ladies, and I mean
well groomed, well dressed, well mannered and polite. I'll help you
whenever you need it, but you have to agree with my rules. Can you
agree Diane?" I rushed into her arms, the tears I cried were the tears
of joy and acceptance.
"Now then." Helen began, "I want to see your wardrobe."
"As far as my wardrobe goes, it's mostly Sharon's, but I have a few
things of my own."
When we were upstairs, we heard the door shut. "I'll show you what I
have."
I led the way to my room, and after I had shown Helen all of the
undergarments, I got out the red "date bait" dress. Just then Sharon
walked into the room.
"Wow! That's some dress Diane!" She turned to Sharon and asked her,
"How'd she look in it Sharon?"
"She knocked'em dead! In fact I felt like a wallflower next to her!"
I stood there while Sharon raved on about how good I looked. I was torn
between being proud of my looks, and the obvious strangeness of being a
boy that liked to wear dresses, and standing there and admitting it.
"Well Diane, after seeing what you have, it seems that we have some
shopping to do. You have enough lingerie for now, but you are going to
need some more summer clothes, and we might as well start planning for
next years school term." Helen spoke as if it that was the plan all
along! "Lets go girls. We need to go shopping!"
Helen led the way, followed by Sharon and I. We stopped at a strip mall
and the three of us went into the beauty shop.
"Hi. Can you do three of us?"
"Yes Ma'am. It'll be a few minutes, have a seat."
Shortly the operator came out. "Hi. I'm Wendy, who's first?"
Of course, both Helen and Sharon pointed at me. "See what you can do
for her will you? Maybe a perm, and lighten her hair to true blonde.
She hasn't had a good cut and perm in a very long time."
Helen then turned to me. "Just go with her honey, it'll be fine. By the
way, Wendy, while we're here, let's get her nails done. They're so
short right now that maybe some acrylics would be best."
By the time we had left the beauty shop, Helen had spent several
hundred dollars. All three of us now had blonde hair, our nails done,
as well as having makeup that was faultless.
"Now then, lets go outfit you with a wardrobe suitable for a young
woman of class." Helen spoke as she walked out the door, continuing in
the car. "Your undergarments are fine, but you need to have a few more
slips, perhaps another cincher, and I also know of a place where we can
get you some of those special pantybrief's that have the fanny pads
built in. They'll give you better definition in the hip area. The
breast forms are okay for now, but why not just go ahead and have some
made for you? They now have them that glue to the body and are
virtually undetectable from the real thing. " I sat there basking in my
newfound beauty and acceptance, and barely heard what Helen was saying.
At the mall we went to Newman's, the largest department store there and
I picked out several bras that met with Helen and Sharon's approval,
along with some slips, both full and half, in selected colors. The
dress shop was next, and together we picked out some skirts, and
dresses that ranged from very dressy, to everyday, and some for church.
The shoe department was next, and I ended up with flats in three
colors, Heels in four colors, and some feminine looking sneakers, along
with panty hose, socks and purses to match it all.
Then, as we passed the swimsuit area, I naturally headed for the
department, Helen stopped me, saying, "Why don't we wait until you have
your custom breastforms, then you can buy a swimsuit. It might change
your selection."
By this time we were getting hungry, so we took the bags to the car and
went to dinner. I started to order like I used to, back when I was
Duane, but Helen and Sharon stopped me. "You have to watch the old
figure Diane. You should probably lose some pounds anyway, so salads
and fish and chicken for you!"
After dinner we went to the store that made the breastforms, and I had
a mold made of my chest. The operator, Joyce told me that it would be
about a week before they were done, and she would call. I signed for
the work and then began to try on the padded pantybrief's.
"These are just right for you Diane, They fit perfect, match your skin
tone, and give you a perfect figure!" Joyce was the only one in the
room, so I asked if I could just wear I home.
"Sure, no problem."
"I think I better get two more, okay?"
"Of course." When I walked into the outer room, Helen and Sharon both
gasped at the change the pantybrief made in my figure. It filled out my
hips just right. "
"Lets go home girls. It's been a big day, and I'm pretty sure that
Diane is as whipped as she is excited!" After we got home, and all of
the clothes had been put away, we met in the den. "Diane, I hope you
know what this means for you. I was sure that if I let you decide, you
would see how hard its going to be for you. But you seem perfectly
comfortable as Diane. I thought the perm and hair color would scare you
off, but you went to it like it was the most natural thing in the
world. I guess you realize that with the perm you're now Diane for a
minimum of three months. We also have to overcome the identification
problem. Since I know that you know how to drive, I wonder, if we moved
back to Gaylord, could we get you a license up there in the name of
Diane?" Helen got "that" look on her face again. What do you girls
think of moving in with me at my home? Sharon's going to State which
isn't that far away, and Diane can start fresh, as my daughter."
Helen looked at both of us, and Sharon spoke first, " I guess its fine
with me, I'll be gone most of the year. It'll have to be Diane's
decision." They both looked at the grin on my face and got the answer.
"Okay. Since we all agree that we are moving, lets figure out what we
are going to take and what to sell. We need to call a Realtor, mover,
arrange to shut off all of the utilities, and pack, and we have to wait
until Diane's breastforms come in and she's fitted, so why don't we
start figuring out what to take and so on. Today's the 10th. Why don't
we plan on being out by the first of the month?"
We all busied ourselves packing and preparing for the move. I had to
get used to working with the extended nails, and the breasts. I had
gone down to the shop and been fitted for the new breastforms a few
days earlier. They were a full B cup, moved and felt like the real
thing, and even got warm to the touch. The woman glued them on, and
told me they would stay for a month easily. They were so closely
matched to my skin tone that I didn't need to do any makeup on the seam
line where they met my chest. They were exactly the right size and
weight for me, and they conducted body heat so that anyone that might
accidentally touch them would not know the difference. In other words,
except for the real thing, they were as close to perfect as you could
get! The house sold in three days since it was in a very nice area, and
true to our goal, we moved to Gaylord on the first of the month.
Helen's house was right on the lake, and she had three extra bedrooms,
so she gave me my choice. "I'd like the one in the back Helen. It's got
plenty of closet space, and I like the view of the lake."
After I had settled my things in my new room, Helen, Sharon and I
headed to a local cafe for a light lunch. It took us about two weeks
before we were reasonably settled in, Sharon and I had taken to calling
Helen Mom. She was uncomfortable at first, but soon realized that we
called her Mom out of our love for her. Sharon and I went into town to
see if we could find something for me to wear to the beach, and by the
time we left the store, I was the proud owner of a fuller cut bikini!
"Now that we are settled in, I think that we're going to have to get
you a drivers license and a social security number. I have to go back
to work, and I expect both of you to get jobs. I'll go with Diane to
get her drivers license tomorrow, and a SS number. There are plenty of
things we have to do to help Diane become as feminine as possible. You
are about 25 pounds overweight for a girl of your height, so you're on
a diet until you lose the weight."
I glanced down at myself, sitting there in a blue and white checked
jumper over a white blouse and white flats, and knew that I might as
well do my best. There really wasn't any choice. Once I had discovered
my true self, I resigned myself to my fate, and I become relaxed and at
ease with myself, except for the moments fear jumped up and bit me.
"I'll tell you that I'm scared that someone will find me out, then
what? I'll be the laughing stock of the town!"
Helen interrupted me, "Calm down Diane. First of all, you're absolutely
lovely. Nobody in their right mind would think that you are a boy, and
second, I'll be right here for you. I'll teach you all of the tricks
that we girls learn at a very young age. Now be calm, trust me, and
before long you'll be as comfortable as Diane as you ever were as
Duane." In my heart I knew she was right.
The rest of that day was spent cleaning, ironing and putting away
clothes. The next day Helen got us up at 7am and told me to wear a
skirt and blouse.
"After breakfast we'll get you a license in the name of Diane, along
with a SS number."
Getting a driver's license turned out to be easy, since one of Helen's
best friends ran the department. After the test I was officially Diane
Marie Guzaki, at least according to the state. Armed with a valid
driver's license, I also got a Social Security number. Helen let me
drive home.
Sharon said, "While you were gone I called for our appointments at
Newman's like you asked, and we are scheduled in at 1pm."
"Thanks Sharon.
Now that I was "official", Helen and Sharon began to refer to me in the
feminine all of the time, and all of my male clothes were gone. Sharon
and I went out the next day to try and find summer jobs. We both ended
up working at Newman's department store. I found myself working in
the custom dress shop, while Sharon was in jewelry. We spent most of
the day filling out forms and finding our way around our own
departments as well as the store. The next morning, after we had
reported for work, I found myself quickly getting the hang of things,
and within the first week I sold three very expensive dresses!
"Goodness Diane! I haven't ever sold three dresses like those in one
week!" My boss, Ruth, was very happy with my attitude and ability! "We
are having a charity ball and modeling party at the country club in a
five weeks, and I'd like you to be one of the models." I was stunned,
in fact, I was so stunned I forgot to say no! Ruth took my silence as a
yes! "Good! I'll help you pick out several dresses, and we can get them
fitted. Oh honey, you'll be a smash!
I didn't know until later what being model meant, except that Ruth told
me I would be changing in a room with other girls and women, getting a
full makeover, modeling lingerie as well as clothes, swimsuits, coats
and hats. When I told Helen and Sharon at dinner, Sharon was ecstatic,
but Helen had some reservations about my ability to do it, given the
very short time I had been dressing as a girl. But, Helen said, with
careful makeup around the breast forms and a close shave the night
before, I might be all right.
"I'll let you do it only if I can be the one to help you change dresses
and so on. Otherwise it might be to risky for you. After all, you've
only just started wearing women's clothes Diane. I understand Ruth's
desire to have you in the show since you are quite lovely. But, we only
have five weeks to get you into shape."
So began my very intensive dieting, training in poise, mannerisms,
walking and so on. Working at the dress shop, I began to find that I
had a natural flair for helping women pick out just the right outfit.
My ability with color and style grew, and my sales were constantly at
the top of the chart. In the following five weeks I lost 22 pounds,
lost two dress sizes, and actually forgot that I was a male! So fluid
were my movements, my graceful walk and poise were only accented by my
manners. But it seemed that all I did was work, putting in longer hours
than the others. In return, I became "the" person to seek out when the
wealthier women in town wanted to buy a dress.
Over the next few weeks, my weight loss had brought me down to a size
10 dress, and I had become so engrossed in everyday life that I was as
natural as if I had been born that way. Helen had also noticed that
young men were taking notice of me, her newest daughter. And rightly
so, since she always told me that I was, without doubt, a real beauty.
I had also been told by some of my co-workers that several young men
had made inquiries about me! In my delight at being able to express my
feminine side, I had forgotten about the effect pretty young girls make
on handsome young men! I had made friends with a co-worker, a girl my
age named Nancy Falston, who told about all the guys checking me out.
"I'm telling you Diane, you don't know how many guys have asked me
about you, and I hear that you went out with Larry Stiles a few times.
His Grandmother is a regular of mine, and she tells me that he is
coming to stay with her for a few weeks and wants to se you again!"
I was somewhat shocked, but I had the charity fashion show and Ball to
get ready for, and quite frankly didn't give Larry another thought.
The following Monday, Ruth asked me to come to her office.
"Good Morning Diane. I thought that we might select the dresses that
you are going to model in the show. Have you given it any thought?"
"Yes Ma'am. I have several dresses in mind Let me show you."
We left the office and walked to the store room where I pulled out my
selections for Ruth's approval. One was a black cocktail dress of
satin, with spaghetti straps, a sweetheart neckline, fitted bodice, and
flaring skirt that came to just above the knees. The next one was a
very chic suit of camel colored silk, with a skirt and slacks. The
jacket was without lapels, and the skirt was A-line. The third and last
dress was a complete bridal outfit, including a traveling suit! The
bridal gown was of white satin, brocaded with pearls. It also had a
sweetheart neckline, but one that showed substantially more cleavage
than the first gown. The sleeves and back were of tulle lace with
pearls attached, and had a matching hat, and veil. The train was long
enough that I would need help if I walked anywhere in it! The traveling
suit was actually a shirtwaist dress, but it was white with a muted red
orchid print and matching jacket.
"I must say that your selections are perfect Diane, and you have chosen
such a wide range! I'm impressed! I'll call the fitter, and we can get
any alterations done before the show."
Ruth left to make the call, and I went to the changing room to change
into the cocktail dress. It took most of the afternoon, but I tried on
every dress I had selected and the fitter made notes and measurements
on the changes she needed to make.
"Your Mother is here to see you Diane." Nancy was carrying a bundle of
clothes as she walked by. Helen was there with Mrs. Stiles, a very
handsome woman indeed.
"Diane, This is Mrs. Stiles, Larry's Grandmother. She and I were out
for lunch and decided to stop in."
"How do you do Mrs. Stiles."
I knew enough to stand there demurely while I was sized up by the
woman. "Your Mother has told me of your participation in the Fashion
show, and I was wondering if you had an escort to the Ball afterward.
If not I would like to suggest that Larry be allowed to escort you. I
know the this isn't quite proper, but he is still in school,
and....well, he told me so much about you. He really likes you and I
hope that you like him. Can I tell him that you have agreed to his
escorting you to the Ball?" I wasn't ready for this! I hadn't yet given
any thought about the Ball. In fact, I had thought that Helen, Sharon
and I would attend by ourselves!
"I have accepted Doug Givens as my escort for that night Diane. You and
Larry could come with us if you like." Helen having a date was also a
shock! It only took a moment for me to figure out that Helen was going
to be there and make sure that I didn't get into trouble.
"I'd love to have Larry escort me to the Ball Mrs. Stiles, Thank you."
"I now have a date for the dance after the show Nancy! Its a guy I met
earlier in the summer, it's that guy Larry Stiles I told you about."
Nancy, who had been trying to find a guy for the semi reclusive Diane
was ecstatic! "That's great Di! Looking the way you do, I just know
that he's a hunk! Right?"
I merely smiled and walked away, but inside I was delighted! In the few
minutes we had talked I realized that I had been accepted as girl in
every way, and thought about Larry. He is tall and handsome, and he
only knows me as Diane, so why not?
There were more surprises in store for me when I got home that evening.
Walking into the house I saw Mrs. Stiles, sitting there, in a very
regal manner, drinking tea with Helen, who spoke first, "Come in dear.
We were just discussing you." You are a very lovely girl Diane, But my
instincts told me that something was wrong. You are a boy, right?"
I was stunned to hear the rest of what Mrs. Stiles had to say !
"I...I...I"
"Mrs. Stiles and I have already talked Diane. I had to tell her
everything."
Mrs. Stiles spoke again, "Listen honey, I don't care. You are without a
doubt the best looking girl in the town, and if Larry can't tell the
boys from the girls, well, that's his problem! I just wanted to tell
you to your face that in all the times I've seen you at the store, I've
never seen you act in anything but a ladylike manner and I wouldn't
tell your secret to anyone! In fact I wish my own daughters were as
pretty and well spoken as you are! Don't feel bad about your Mother
telling me. I can't explain it, but I just knew something wasn't right.
You might say that I forced the issue."
I started to cry right there in front of both of them. "Don't cry
Diane. You must be under an awful strain." Mrs. Stiles took me in her
arms and comforted me until the sobbing had slowed down some.
"I can't go back to being Duane! I just can't! I told you someone would
find out! I'm ruined, I'll be the laughing stock of the entire town! I
want to be like all of the other girls!"
I spun and ran to my room and closed the door with a slam. Half an hour
later Helen and Mrs. Stiles cautiously opened the door to my room. It's
me honey, Mom." I looked at them through red rimmed eyes, despair
written on my face like a tabloid headline, stark and open. Mrs. Stiles
spoke gently.
"If you want to be a complete woman Diane, all you have to do is ask. I
swing a lot of weight in this town and I'm sure that we can get you
whatever it is that you need. But womanhood is more than clothes and
makeup. It's a state of mind. A woman knows many things that a man does
not. How to cry is only one of them. Your desire to achieve is
reflected by your attention to yourself, and I can tell you that there
are many women who would love to have a daughter such as you. Now, if
you like, I'll talk to some people and see if we can help you in your
quest for womanhood."
I simply started crying again. The women left me to cry it out and
resolve those inner conflicts I was facing. I was about to make the
biggest decision of my life. I knew what I wanted, yet I was scared of
the uncertain future. I didn't feel the guilt that most TV's felt, at
least those I had read about. I felt confident and sure of myself most
of the time, a feeling I never had as Duane. I was smaller than most of
the other guys and I was painfully aware that even then I looked like I
had a girls frame. But now that I could express myself as Diane, I was
accepted, with no thought to anything except my ability in the dress
shop. I hadn't even considered boys, and except for the few times I
went with Sharon, I never had the desired to be with boys!
I was too busy perfecting myself by constant effort. By dinnertime I
had made my decision. I walked silently down the stairs.
"Mom?" Helen turned around to see me standing there, I held my head
high, smiling. "I've decided that if Mrs. Stiles can help me become
Diane in the truest, and fullest sense of the word, then I'm ready! I
lost Mom and Dad, Sharon's moving to the college, and I'll be damned if
I'll let myself lose Diane! And you....Mom."
Helen rushed forward to accept hold me, as a daughter, a real
daughter, one that she knew she would be proud of. Holding onto each
other we became as one, of one mind and one heart, Mother and daughter,
to overcome what, right then, was a minor obstacle.
The next morning, when I got up, I found Sharon sitting there at the
kitchen table. As soon as Sharon saw me, she rushed and took me onto
her arms.
"I want you to know that I am very happy for you Diane. I think that I
knew from the first day you dressed up that you would never be happy
until you became a woman. Last night Mom told me all about what
happened today. It might feel like a cruel way to discover something
about yourself, but in the end, it would have come out anyway. I told
you before that I care about you the person, and would love you
whatever your decision was. I also told you that I always wanted a
sister, and your being that sister has no bearing on the way I thought
about you and I meant it. I'm so happy for you!!"
We hugged, and of course the three of us started crying again. It was
more than obvious that I had my entire families support. Buoyed by the
confidence they gave me, I was ready to start the new day.
"Hey you two, we have to get to work!"
The day seemed to fly by and it wasn't until I got home that I
remembered that we only had one week until the fashion show and Ball.
"Mom! I'm going to ask Ruth if I can wear the little black dress I'm
modeling to the dance."
Helen had made arrangements with my boss Ruth so that she could be the
one to help me during the changes I would have to make during the
fashion show. As it happens, I was the first one down the runway,
wearing the tailored camel suit, first wearing the skirt, then with the
pants shortly after. The rest of the girls walked the runway and the
audience oooed and ahhhed in all of the right places. My second trip on
the boardwalk was in the black dress that I had selected to wear to the
Ball. But the very last dress in the show was the bridal outfit, with
me modeling it of course!
I brought the house to its feet. The gown was, without a doubt, the
stopper of the show. My demure walk, firm posture and beauty showed
both the dress and myself to perfection. The coordinator had lighted
the runway to accent the dress, and audience went silent during my walk
down the boards. When I reached the end of the runway and stood there,
the audience broke into applause. The rest of the girls modeling came
out onto the runway to the continuing applause of the audience, and
after a moment they stepped back and left me in the spotlight alone,
wearing the bridal dress. I got a standing ovation from the crowd and
then the rest of the models joined them. I admit it, I was in seventh
heaven! It was almost every girls dream, and yet I was the one standing
there, and I had only been a girl for a few months!
The changing out of the bridal gown was quickly done as Mother was
there to help me. I changed into some jeans and a pullover blouse,
slipped on my flats and grabbed the black dress on the way out with mom
right behind me. Ruth stopped us on the way out of the arena.
"Diane! You were such a hit! I can't tell you how many people wanted to
congratulate you. There aren't enough words to tell you what a fine job
you did. As a reward for all of your efforts, you can have the black
dress to keep, besides, nobody else could wear as well as you do. See
you at the Ball tomorrow night."
Mom and I looked at each other and began to laugh! I had made the
greatest hit of my life, and I was now being accepted, truly accepted
as for myself, and not a freak like I feared.
I spent the whole day Saturday primping and getting ready for the big
Ball. Sharon, Mom and I went to the beauty shop and got our hair and
nails done again. By this time my hair had grown quite long, so I had
it done in a very stylish chignon, with rhinestone clips and trailing
tendrils that framed my face. When I left the shop it was easy to see
that I was simply on cloud nine.
"Larry and Doug will be here at 6pm Diane. Let's get you dressed. I
went to my room, and started dressing, starting with white satin
panties, lace trimmed, French cut. I slipped them on and then called
for mom to come into the room.
"I'll need some help with this corset Mom. Can you give me a hand?" She
came in and started lacing up the corset. When she was done, I had a
36-24-36 figure. My breastforms lay in the built in cups, undetectable
from the real thing. I quickly slipped on the hosiery and clipped them
to the garter straps, and then I slipped on my flats.
I started looking for the dress, and when it was not to be found in my
room I slipped on a robe and went downstairs.
"Mom, I can't find my dress. Do you know where it is?" Sharon walked
into the room carrying what was obviously a dress, covered in plastic.
"I think you'll like this on better Di. Come on, I'll help you try it
on."
Sharon took my hand and led the way back to my room. I had no idea what
was going on, but Sharon seemed to know, so I followed her. Sharon hung
the dress on a door hanger and as she took the plastic off, she could
hear me gasping in the background.
"What's going on here?" Sharon merely smiled at me.
"It's your gift from Mom and me! Try it on, I can hardly wait!"
Mom walked in just as I had slipped off my robe. Sharon took the dress
from its hanger and she and mom held it out so that I could get it over
my head. Once it was on and zipped up, I went to the mirror in my room
to see it. It was a rose colored floor length gown of satin. In fact,
it looked just like the wedding gown I modeled the day before! Minus
the hat, veil, and long train of course.
Mom also presented me with a pair of matching shoes and purse. After a
frantic hour, while we all finished dressing, Sharon's date, Tom
Bigelow arrived to pick her up. Mom and I had to wait about 20 minutes
before Doug and Larry showed up. When Larry saw me, he literally
gasped.
"You look even prettier than the last time I saw you Diane!" Mom made
the introductions and after the presentation of corsages, the guys
escorted us to the car, which for the occasion was a white, rented
limousine.
"Larry and I decided that we couldn't take the best looking women in
town to the dance in anything less than a limousine. Our white charger
so to speak." Doug was grinning while he said it, but the "Look" on
Larry's face said it all. He was, without a doubt, head over heels in
love with me! he looked like a moonstruck kid in a candy store for the
first time.
Our entrance to the Ball was done in the grandest fashion. A gentleman
acting as a sort of maitre' de took our invitations and announced them.
"Ladies and Gentlemen. Helen and Diane Guzaki, escorted by Larry Stiles
and Doug Givens."
Larry took my arm and we walked together down the promenade, and I was
beaming in delight at having him as my date. Both the women, some in
envy, others in admiration, and the men in desire and awe, watched
Larry and Doug escort us to reception line. Without prompting, I
instinctively knew the proper etiquette, and both curtsied and bowed
when required. Larry effortlessly guided me to our table.
Sitting at the table was Helen, Doug, Sharon, Tom, Larry, Mrs.Stiles,
her escort, Dr. John Wallis, and myself. Mrs. Stiles made the
introductions. An announcement from the stage drew everyone's
attention.
"Ladies and Gentlemen, The dance will begin, with Miss Diane Guzaki and
Larry Stiles."
Larry and I were shocked to say the least, but Mrs. Stiles told them
she had arranged it.
"I don't want any complaints from you two. You're the best looking
couple here and you know it, so go start the dance."
Larry took my hand and led me to the dance floor. The music started, a
waltz by Dmitri Shostakovich - The Second Waltz. Larry took me into his
arms, and swept me away with the lilting tempo of the music. My ability
in heels were as good as any woman's, but my skill at waltzing wasn't.
It didn't seem to matter however as Larry masterfully led us across the
floor in a demonstration of beautiful dancing and graceful footwork. So
effortlessly did he make it look that nobody rose to join us on the
dance floor. It was almost the end of that tune before anyone joined us
in fact. Larry and I danced several more waltzes before returning to
our table and the applause of those sitting there.
"You two were so wonderful out there! I just knew I was right in
choosing you to start the dance."
Mrs. Stiles was grinning from ear to ear. Apparently she had more than
a major part in the Ball than she had let on. I knew I was all smiles,
and felt that I was simply radiating the beauty that only youth have.
Slightly winded, I sat there sipping on an iced tea, while the events
and the music swirled around us. Larry of course wanted to drag me out
of there and be alone with me, but with his Grandmother sitting there,
common sense prevailed. Mom was also in her glory, and as the Mother of
Diane, basked in the reflected light of her newest daughter. The food
was served a little later, and what a surprise I got when Mrs. Stiles
reached into her purse and pulled out a satin Napkin that matched my
dress exactly!
"It would be a real shame if you got anything on that dress Diane, so I
had this made for you." She passed it across the table, and Larry
jumped to his feet to assist me fastening it around my neck.
The night seemed to fly by and to soon it was over. I felt like the
princess I had been treated like all evening. Something like
Cinderella. After the goodnights, we were taken home. Larry swept me
into his arms and kissed me with all of the passion he had, and I,
caught up in the events of the evening let him. Since I had decided
that I would complete whatever was needed to become the woman of my
dreams, kissing Larry was, quite all right!
"Can we go out tomorrow night Diane?" The pleading in his voice told me
that he was really in love.
"Come over at 6pm, Larry, but lets go casual, okay?"
"Sure Di, see you then."
Mom, Sharon, and I slept in until late morning, Sharon was the first
one up as usual and she started coffee and began to make a breakfast of
sliced melon and toast. Mom and I came down later, drawn by the aroma
of the coffee and toast.
"Seems like we have a new Princess in the family Sharon. Di really
wowed the crowd last night. By the way Di, where did you learn to dance
like that?"
"I never knew I could! Larry just swept me along, and wherever he went,
I went!"
"Well, that crowd at the Ball is the cream of the high society here in
Gaylord, and I'll bet I had at least 25 people ask me why I've kept you
under wraps for so long. I'd say that you have been accepted! By the
way, you have an appointment with Dr. Wallis Monday morning at 10,
don't be late honey, it's very important."
Mom would not expand on her reasons for the appointment, but I kind of
guessed anyway. I was about to begin my transformation into the real
woman everyone thought she was.
Larry came by promptly at 6 and we went out to enjoy a quiet dinner.
After the previous evenings festivities, we were both still a little
tired, but Larry seemed to be on edge.
"Diane, I want to ask you something. I know its pretty quick, but...but
I want you to marry me!"
"I can't get married Larry. I'm only just turning 17, and I have to
finish high school, but you're very sweet for asking me. Maybe, if I
were older, maybe I'd say yes. But right now I can't."
"Well, if you won't marry me, will you wear my class ring?" He held it
in my hand, the center stone of blue glistening in the shaded lamps of
the restaurant.
"I'd love to Larry." I took the ring from my hand and slipped it on my
finger. It almost fell off, so I put it in my purse until I could wind
the string around the ring to make it small enough to wear. With Larry
just holding my hand, it made me painfully aware of my status as a
person not enough male, and certainly not enough female. What I really
wanted to do right then was one thing, but what I could do was another
altogether.
The next day at 10 on the dot, I was in Dr. Wallis' office.
"Now then Diane, I understand that you have a problem that needs some
help. Want to tell me about it?" I told him about my transition from
Duane to Diane, and my fervent desire to be complete. When I was done
he looked at me and then asked me to disrobe for a physical exam. He
poked, prodded, and took samples of all of my fluids, took my weight,
height and other statistics he would need. When I was again dressed, we
met in his office and talked it over.
"If Samantha, Mrs. Stiles, had not told me about you, I never would
have guessed, but I believe that you are old enough to begin the
treatments. But first let me tell you of all the changes that will
occur." He outlined the changes I would undergo, both good and bad. The
weight gain, the moodiness, the widening of the hips and breast tissue
growth. "This is usually a two year program Diane, but because you are
emotionally ready now, I see no reason that we cannot complete your
transformation by your 18th birthday. Let's start with this shot."
He gave me a hormone shot, and then filled out a prescription for me,
5Mg a day. "Take the purple ones for 25 days in a row, then take the
white ones for 5 days. I want to see you once a week, and watch your
diet or you'll gain weight taking these hormones."
I was all smiles as I left the doctors office. Finally, I was on the
road to what I wanted... complete womanhood. Even though the Doctor had
told me I could not have children, I would be complete in every other
respect.
Sharon and I spent all day Sunday cleaning the house, and packing for
Sharon's move to the college. On Monday I had to go back to work, so
Mom would be taking Sharon to the college, but since Sharon couldn't
take her car, she gave it to me. The tearful hugs lasted as long as
possible the next morning, then I took the car to work. When I got to
the dress shop, I got a standing ovation from the sales staff there.
"Diane honey, Mr. Newman wants to see you right away, but first we want
to say how much you mean to us here in fashion sales." Ruth hugged me,
her self appointed prot?g?, and sent me on my way to see Mr. Newman.
His secretary let me into the inner office.
"Come in Diane! I just wanted to tell you how much I enjoyed your
modeling debut. So far this morning we have received over 50 calls for
you. Seems that you have a fan club, and every one of them wants to buy
a dress from you! I can't have my star salesperson working for the
beginner's commission, so I'm putting you on salary, and with a raise
in your commission rate. You'll be assistant Department manager from
here on. Congratulations Diane." He reached out and took my hand in
his. "If you continue selling at this rate Diane, I'll have to make you
Department manager soon." With that he escorted me to the outer office.
"Again, congratulations Diane. You've earned this job, and we're all
very proud of you."
I was still in shock when I walked back to my department. Ruth rushed
up to me, and taking me gently by the elbow, took me to my new office.
"This is all yours now Diane. I called the painters and they are coming
up to put your name on the door this afternoon. In the meantime, I have
three people waiting to see you."
Mrs. Stiles, in the company of two of her friends were waiting for me
when I walked into the showroom.
"How nice to see you again Mrs. Stiles. How can I help you today?"
"I've told Dolores and Margret about your skills, and they decided to
let you help them in their selections. This is Mrs. Schemner, Dolores,
and this is my oldest friend, Mrs. Swanson."
"I'd be delighted to assist you ladies."
My entire day was like that. Customers coming in, two and three at a
time. By the time I was ready to go home, I had sold almost 20 very
expensive dresses!
"Mom, I'm whipped! First, I was promoted to assistant Manager of the
department, with a salary and a raise in my commissions, and then the
people started coming in. Geez, my feet are killing me. I think I'll
just sit here and turn into a vegetable!"
"Why that's great honey! I'm so proud of you! Why don't I make some
dinner, then you can take a bath and relax for the rest of the night."
Mom made dinner, one of my favorites. Chicken, a big salad with all the
trimmings, Jell-O, and coffee. For dessert mom had a low calorie white
cake! It was almost 7pm before I appeared in the den.
I had had very little time to myself now, so when Larry called and
asked me to go the beach on Sunday afternoon, I was more than willing.
Besides, the only place I had worn my new bikini was in the back yard.
Larry and I spent a very relaxing day at the beach. Larry wanted to
talk about the future, his plans to go into the military academy and
his hopes for the two of us. I sat and listened to him and became very
appreciative of his ability to focus on a goal and follow through.
After lunch, and several hours laying on the blanket, Larry and I both
got the a good tan, Mine is a typical bikini tan. It was almost 7pm by
the time I got home, and after a quick kiss, I went to my room. There
was a soft knock on the door.
"Hi. Can I come in?"
"Sure Mom. Come in."
Mom sat on the bed and looked me. "Diane, we have to think about your
future. What do you plan to do after school?"
"I haven't given it much thought, but my job at Newman's is going great
guns, so I thought I might stay there."
"School is going to start in a month or so, and we have to get you
registered. I wrote to your school and asked that your transcripts be
sent here. We might have to get a lawyer to help us with your
transition from Duane to Diane, but after we do that, I was wondering
if you ever considered working co-op? If you can get into that program,
then you can continue at Newman's and still go to school, and if you
took some business classes, then, well who knows. Newman's is a big
store. You might have a future there." I hadn't considered the problems
of the school records, but I had committed to a course that would take
me into full womanhood, and I was determined that I going to finish the
course.
"Whatever you think is best. Co-op sounds great. If Mr. Newman lets me,
I'll be able to work part time at the store."
The next week Mom spent some time with the lawyer trying to find out
what was needed for me to actually become Diane.
"Its really quite simple Helen. First I'll have her name changed
legally, then we can petition the courts to have her school records
completely amended, from grade school all the way through current. I'll
start right away since we only have a month."
"Thanks Stan. I knew I could count on you." By the time mom got home
the evening, I had finished making dinner, had the table set, and was
ready for a date with Larry. "I talked to Stan, my lawyer and he'll
take care of everything. By the time he's done Duane will have never
existed."
"That's great! Now if I can get Mr. Newman to go along with the plan,
then I'll be set! Let's eat dinner before it gets cold, we can talk
over dinner."
Mom and I had become very close over the past few months, and like all
Mothers everywhere, she was concerned about my welfare, and since I was
undergoing some major changes in my body, she was even more concerned
than average.
"What did the Doctor say when you saw him today, everything okay?"
"After dinner I'll show you." When we had cleaned the table and washed
the dishes, Mom and I went to my room, and after taking my clothes off
down to my panties, I showed her the results of two months of hormone
treatments.
I had developed a swelling that would very soon become fully formed
breasts as well as a definitely larger hip. "Well! Look at that! My
girls growing up! What else did he tell you?" That I weigh 118 pounds,
I'm 5'7" tall, my blood pressure is up some, but not bad. He said its
from the hormones, and that within another two months I won't need any
padding...anywhere!" A grin split my face, my easy laugh causing mom
smile as well.
The rest of the summer time went by fast, Larry was leaving for the
academy soon, and I was beginning to resent the fact that I could not
send him back to school in a more memorable fashion. But I knew that by
the time the year was out I would be a complete woman, then Larry and I
could begin a life together when he got out of the service. In the
meantime I continued to work, and prepare for the school year. Working
at Newman's gave me an employee discount, and I had been buying
clothes, shoes, and so on for the upcoming school year. The lawyer had,
true to his word replaced Duane with Diane in all of my records. I had
a new birth certificate that listed Helen as my Mother, and when he had
changed my name, he gave me Helen's last name as well. When at last
school started, I was ready.
Most of the kids knew me, or at least knew of me from all of the
publicity surrounding my modeling debut. They also found out quickly
that I was attached to Larry Stiles. School was, as usual, hectic for
the first few weeks. I was accepted into the co-op program on the
strength of a recommendation from Ruth and Mr. Newman. Therefore, I
only had a three hour day at the school. By October, I had no need for
the breast forms, since I had developed a very nice 36 A+ figure of my
own.
The Doctor told me that by the end of the first term I would be a full
36B cup, and my hips would be fully developed as well. Because of the
short day at school, I began dressing for work, rather than school, in
suits and tailored clothes. I found that I liked the look better and I
was received better by the women that came to see me at the store.
I was taking a shower, getting ready for Thanksgiving dinner, and when
I walked out of the bathroom, I was surprised to see Sharon sitting on
the bed waiting for me.
"Hi Sis! Thought I'd surprise you!" After some hugging, Sharon held me
at arms length and looked me over carefully. "I'm impressed Diane. I
really am. No trace of beard, and you have obviously grown in some
strategic places! Those aren't the glue on boobs are they?" I smiled,
shook my head no, and dropped the towel to my waist. "Oh my God Diane!
You have grown! " I covered myself up while Sharon continued.
"I don't see any trace of the beard anymore either! Girl, you're really
looking good!" We hugged again, then I started getting dressed for
dinner. I had selected a tailored mint green suit with a matching
skirt, an antique white silk blouse with lace trim. I wore light green
and white accessories with shoes that accented the outfit. My hair was
now a luxuriant, shoulder length auburn colored mane, styled to frame
my face and flow in waves down my back. Sharon went to her room and as
she started to change, she saw a suit bag on the door. Opening it, she
found an exact twin of the suit I was wearing! Shoes and accessories
were also there as well.
I heard her squeal in delight, then later, when we were ready, we came
down the stairs together. Mom thought she as seeing double for a
minute! Her daughters were everything she ever expected. Beautiful,
smart, well dressed, polite, and they loved her. A Mother could ask for
no more.
At the table with Mom were Dr. Wallis and his wife Jean, Stan Markson,
our lawyer and his wife Marie, Mrs. Stiles, and Larry. I saw Larry and
rushed to greet him, but at the last minute remembered that people
where watching us, so I kissed him on the cheek. Then Sharon and I sat
down.
Mom, and I had spent the morning making the dinner, and it was a feast.
Dinner conversation centered on Sharon's plans after she graduated but
the true center of the questions were on mine and Larry plans.
"I have a four year obligation after I graduate from the academy, which
will be next year, but I was hoping that Diane would marry me before I
start that obligation." Smiling, he handed me an engagement ring.
Everyone looked at me, waiting for a response. I on the other hand, was
stunned! I had no indication that he would do something like this.
"Of course I accept!" I jumped up in glee and wrapped my arms around
his neck and kissed him.
The rest of them started clapping, and there was much hugging and well
wishing going on. After dinner, we women cleared the table and then met
the men in the family room. Larry and I were arm in arm, but he was
looking scared at the prospect of being married, yet excited that I had
accepted him. I was rosy cheeked, and all smiles, in the manner that
only women get when they are getting married.
During the evening, Dr. Wallis told me to come to his office in the
morning for my weekly exam. Larry heard him, and asked what was the
matter.
"Diane has a form of genital dysfunction that won't allow her to have
children Larry. But she will be very healthy after we finish the
treatments. By the time you two get married she'll be just fine. She
might not be able to have children, but if you let this girl get away
from you, you'll be sorry for the rest of your life."
The Doctor spoke lightly, but by the tone in his voice, he meant it!
Larry looked right at me, but spoke to the Doctor.
"Don't worry Doctor, we can adopt if we decide to have children. I just
want her well." Larry had to take his Grandmother home, but he and I
made a date for the next evening.
"It looks like you have made Larry's day Diane. I'm so happy for you."
mom hugged me, and then I turned to Sharon when she ahemed in the
background.
"Just think, my little sister is getting married! Remember when I found
you dressed for the first time? I never would have guessed that you
were really a girl underneath that boy exterior, but I sure am glad!"
That night I fairly floated to my room. My birthday was coming up soon
and I would be 18, finally able to let Dr. Wallis make the final
adjustments to my body, the one that would let me be complete. I
planned to ask the doctor, during my appointment the next day to
schedule my surgery as soon as he could after my birthday. I went to
bed dreaming of Larry and some kids around the house, you know the one,
its got the white picket fence.
When I saw Dr. Wallis the next day, I asked about the surgery, and was
told that he would schedule me into the hospital on Jan 10th. If all
went well, I should be home in two weeks, and able to function within a
month. Almost my entire body had undergone the metamorphosis from male
to female, and in all but one respect I was as much a woman as any
female. Soft skin, gentle voice, rounded figure and a natural bone
structure. The structure that made me unable to compete with the boys
in my "before Diane" life. When I got home I told Mom what the Doctor
said, and we started to plan my schooling around the intended date of
the surgery.
Sharon went back to college, and I continued my daily routine, but the
time passed ever so slowly for me. My anticipation was so much greater
than my willingness to wait, which only made the waiting worse.
Christmas was a quiet time for the Guzaki family, and we shared the
holiday with each other. Larry was unable to be with me, but he called
and we spent a lot of time on the phone. I had gotten all three of us
designer dresses and purses to match, while Sharon had bought me some
very sexy lingerie for the time when I would be able to wear, and use
it.
On the day before Dr. Wallis was to operate, he and I met and he very
carefully covered, once again, all of the procedures I would have to
undergo, and the dangers involved. But I was in high spirits and
nothing he said would, or could deter me.
I was wheeled out of the surgery, groggy and unaware of the normal
hospital chaos around me. When I finally became aware of my
surroundings, the first person I saw was Larry. He kissed me gently on
the forehead, and held my hand firmly in his own. The last thing I
remembered before I awoke in the recovery room was the nurse giving me
a shot! But Larry being there for me made me feel warm all over, my
love for him overflowing.
"You better let me have some time with Diane alone Larry, I'll be just
a minute." Dr. Wallis checked his work, and left me to rest. "Larry,
why don't you wait until tomorrow afternoon before you come back. She's
very tired and needs her rest."
I got a lot of get well cards while I was in the hospital, and all of
my friends came by to see me, even Mr. Newman stopped by, along with
Ruth. In ten days I was finally released, and when I got home, mom took
me to my room and made me rest for a while before getting up to eat..
This time, the days passed quickly for me, and I was back in school
within the month. I went back to work in the middle of February. I
graduated with honors of course, and Newman's offered me full time as
head of the Department when Ruth retired in August! Larry and I were
married in June, and I wore the same bridal gown I had modeled so
proudly, not so long ago. We are patiently waiting for Larry to finish
his obligation to the military, but we have started our life together
as man and wife.
After our honeymoon and Larry returned to his base, I reflected on the
first time I dressed up in Sharon's clothes, and found truth in the
adage that you have look before you leap, impulsive acts can change
your life. It certainly changed mine.