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This story is a tribute to a friend outside my crossdressing social circle. He really does have the mantra that "to get on business, you have to be prepared to do anything." Just to clarify, he is not a multi- millionaire tycoon, but a corporate accountant. Finally, it has taken a while to publish because the plot of the first draft was utterly absurd and implausible. This version is hardly gritty realism but it is less silly. ********** It had been quite a dilemma for Ash. He prided himself on being decisive but this one had taken a while to conclude the answer. After the company that he worked for went bust, and in a deflated jobs market, he struggled to find a suitable new opening. After a few weeks kicking around impatiently, his wife, Suranya, had come up with a suggestion. "There is an opening at my place, you could have that." She referred to it as her place, but it was actually owned by her parents. They remained in India whilst Suranya ran the European arm of their company, administering the rights and royalties for Indian authors when their works were released in the UK and some parts of Europe. To Ash it sounded like easy money once the contracts with the writer were sorted, but it was nicely profitable. He was about to agree straight away, but paused to get the conditions. "Firstly, the role is as my PA," Suranya told him. "Mel is going off on maternity leave, and the replacement that I thought that I recruited has let me down." Ash was uncertain. Being his wife's PA had the potential to be an awkward dynamic, plus he felt that being a PA to a woman was sort of a woman's job. He felt a bit guilty about the stereotyping, but it was how he had observed things functioning in the workplace. "Secondly," Suranya continued when getting a silence in response, "I don't think it would look right if my husband was my work subordinate, because I am a fair but demanding boss." "So you would rather I said no?" he asked. "Not at all, just that it would have to be in some sort of disguise. And thirdly..." Ash nodded and Suranya tutted. "Stop nodding, you have not even heard what the final thing is yet." She was pleased to see him comply. "Thirdly, I have always had a woman as a PA, so you would attend in that role." Ash gulped. "That wouldn't work at all," he retorted. "It's you that is not working at all at the moment!" Suranya snapped, then added in a softer tone "and I think you could do it." "But what would happen when we have to go aboard? My passport would still be a man's passport." "You know I don't go abroad that often, the travel time is just wasted. And if I do have to hop over to the continent, you would be much more useful making sure the office runs smoothly at this end." Ash nodded at this, despite previous instruction, as it did tally with Suranya's normal working routine. He knew there were four other people in the office bar Suranya's PA, two working on sales, one on the contracts aspect of things and one finance person. In order to get on in business, he was prepared to do anything that it took. Taking over as much of the finance and admin work would be no problem and a good start. Running the office in Suranya's absence was equally manageable. But was working as a woman too much? The thing that he would not risk whilst building a new empire? "Can I have some time to think about it, Roo?" Roo was his pet name for Suranya. "I am running out of time to arrange a replacement for the replacement, so I need an answer by tomorrow evening." "OK. By tomorrow evening." ********** Suranya was a little late returning from the office the following day and her demeanour told Ash that she had gone through a rather irritating day. She did not press him for his answer immediately, but waited until they were sat down over dinner. "Well, I'm still waiting for an answer," she smiled, for the first time since she got home. "I'm inclined to do it, to help you when and where you need it, but I am worried that I will looked like a total idiot." "Oh honey," Suranya beamed, "I was not intending to throw you in at the deep end. I'll teach you everything you need to know to work as a woman. I'll buy whatever you need. But I will require that you come in to get a week's handover from Mel." Ash still looked dubious. "I can make you look just like woman. You don't have a giant stature that would give you away, all you would have to do is remember your deportment, and not be self-conscious about it all." "What deportment?" "I can teach you that too. Either you or I have control over everything that is needed. There is nothing to worry about," Suranya reassured him. Ash was not convinced but agreed to her suggestion, despite the hunch that he was walking into a huge con trick. But, he told himself, if he was ready for the con, he would be able to dodge it and flip the initiative in his own favour. Spotting a stitch up was the second most important thing in getting on in business. Or was that just office politics? Anyway, he wa primed for it. ******* Three and half weeks later Suranya had driven him to his wits end in his preparation. She had suggested that he think of a woman that he could use as a role model. She was pleasantly surprised that he did not nominate a film star or model but also a little bit jealous that his pick was a woman that he was at university with. Her name was Purnima, and that became his character's name. She wanted a demure and malleable PA and a name that meant 'full moon' in English somehow seemed suitable. Throughout the near month of Purnima's education, she reinforced that by noting whenever relevant that it was a cute name for a sweet girl. Initially Purnima had been embarrassed when she said it, but as time passed she grew to enjoy the compliment. Training Purnima had progressed even better than Suranya expected. She had picked up deportment and a feminine way of movement and doing things quite naturally. A nice wardrobe of both outer and under clothing had been assembled, although they were not finished yet. Purnima had not got the hang of doing her make up quite so quickly but a lot of practice had solved that, despite Purnima's impatience making her far from demure nd malleable. She was growing her hair but in the short term would do with a wig, Initially Suranya had noticed that the character of Purnima was being switched on when training went ahead, and turned off at other times. She could not yet expect Ash to go out as Purnima, he was not ready to do so, but as the days passed, it was noticeable that she was in less of a rush to change out of a skirt into trousers, or remove her make up at the first opportunity. Suranya even complimented her husband that he looked five years younger as Purnima, which made him blush. She was not sure if that was down to modesty or embarrassment but being able to pass for mid-twenties by age was going to help her fit the work role. It was something else she could use to sustain Purnima's self belief. On the Saturday before her handover week started, Suranya gave Purnima her public debut with a cafe lunch. Purnima was terrified but Suranya reassured her that she looked just like a normal woman and would just blend into the background. She was wearing a grey woollen long sleeved top, a chocolate brown skirt just beyond knee length, and calf high flat soled black boots. Suranya had bought some modest B cup breast forms, which suited Purnima's desire to avoid unnecessary attention. Initially awkward in public, Purnima soon realised that her wife was right. She did get the odd second glance from a passing man but there were no adverse reactions that she could tell. Suranya's confidence was not jut false bravado and it was beginning to wear off to Purnima, so when they returned home, Purnima was feeling very pleased with herself. "You know, Roo, this might just work." "I said it would. But don't get complacent - the office environment where everyone is in a much narrower space day after day will be more challenging. No margin for errors." Purnima nodded. "But one thing. I am going to the office early on Monday, but Mel does not need you there until ten o'clock, so you will have to make your own way there. And don't drive - your Audi is not a PA's car and we are short of parking anyway. And that applies everyday, because I don't want the staff working out that we live together. It is in your interest that they don't do so." Purnima had a few seconds of panic at going out unaccompanied, but thought back to the afternoon out and calmed down. Suranya looked over quizzically, so Purnima nodded her understanding. "Good girl," Suranya told her. ********** Purnima travelled to the office by taxi on Monday, a luxury that would not be practical everyday. She slipped out of the car once arriving at the small suite of offices and paused. This was the last chance to dip out of it, although Suranya would be furious. She swallowed her nerves and walked up to the door with a confidence greater than she truly felt inside. She hit the buzzer in the front door, and Mel let her in. "Purnima, isn't it? Nice to meet you." "Call me Nima. Nice to meet you too." They shared a tentative handshake and went through the standard introductory small talk. Suranya was on the phone but when she was finished, Mel took Nima into Suranya's office for a further introduction. Purnima was ready for a quick chat, only to be taken aback when bombarded with a long list of what was OK and what was not. Any sense that this would be a less than averagely formal working relationship was soon blasted out of the water. After Suranya paused for breath, Nima went back to Mel's workspace. "Is she always like that?" Nima asked Mel. "That's a good day." "Really?" "No," Mel laughed, "just kidding. She gets a bit intense when the pressure's on but never unreasonably so. We all tend to pitch in together here, so it makes it a bit easier to allow for when someone gets a bit stressed." "Phew," smiled Nima, "I don't mind helping out any of the others - anything to move along in business." "But one thing. Suranya will sometimes set you little tricks, tasks or games. Do take them seriously because if you ignore them she gets a teeny bit angry. Even if you don't like them, just pretend that they are a fun challenge." Nima almost replied that it sounded just like her, but managed to stop in time. After giving Nima a brief run through of everything that there was to hand over in the coming week, Mel took her through to introduce her to the other employees. Tom and Anil were responsible for sales, both in Nima's estimate in their late twenties, perhaps early thirties. The contracts expert was an older man named Sarath, who looked exactly as careworn by years of examining documentation down to the smallest minutiae that most people would imagine. The finance woman, Vari, was, as is standard for the role, of almost indeterminate age, but Nima suspected late thirties. First impressions were that she would not be the most talkative colleague, as per her accounting stereotype. Nima introduced herself as per a tale pre-planned with Suranya. "Hi, I'm Nima," she told the group. "I did a degree in accountancy but after two years working in finance it dawned on me that it was probably not the job that I wanted, so I packed it in. About the same time, I heard from a family friend that Suranya needed someone here at short notice, so passed on my CV before word got too far around. I had thought that publishing might be an industry that I would like to work in, and this will give me a taster to find out whether this is a business that I want to move up in." ************* In the middle of Nima's second week at work she got an email from Suranya. It seemed a bit strange she was in the adjacent room and had the door open, whereas emails across the void of a few metres only tended to happen when Suranya was on a phone call and needed some quick information. The subject was "Read Me - Now." Nima opened it and read the single line of text. "By dinner this evening you will have a list of the good things and bad things about working as a woman." She was shocked, due to an instant and unjustified paranoia that someone else may be reading over her shoulder. She looked around to check, then closed the email. This was not just a whim question, this was one that had, from Suranya's point of view, correct and incorrect answers. And probably the irrelevant ones were important to note as well. For instance, the question used the phrase 'working as a woman' rather than 'working as Purnima,' so anything referring to how the PA job was working were not of interest. Nima put a piece of paper close to hand and spend the day adding to the entries, then maybe scribbling a bunch of them out. By the time the office was packing up for the night she had a list to work with, but not not necessarily one that she was completely happy with. When she made it home, Suranya had a surprise and told her to change back to Ash as quickly as possible, as they were going out to dinner. Ash had become too embroiled in the role of Nima to switch back in a few minutes and Suranya was getting a bit impatient when he was finally ready. "Got your list?" She reminded him as they were about to leave. Ash nodded. They walked to a nearby Italian restaurant that they used relatively frequently. Suranya was amused to note that Ash had forgotten to drop some feminine mannerisms, and she was not going to remind him. At one stage she dropped her handbag over his outstretched arm, which caught him by surprise. He was initially surprised, then laughed as he returned the bag to her. After that the arm stayed strictly by his side, in a stiff and unnatural fashion. Disappointingly for Suranaya he had cleaned off his nail polish quite efficiently - she had hoped that might be something she could tease Ash with in the restaurant. She would have a trivial revenge for that. Once they arrived, things progressed without controversy until they were waiting for dessert. "Soooo," Suranya asked nonchanantly, "are we ready to go through your list?" Ash looked around nervously and noted that he needed to keep the noise level low. "Yes." "Good," she replied in an exaggerated whisper. "First, I want the good things about working as a woman." "One. I loved the attention that my wife lavished on me as she was teaching me all the things that I needed to know." Ash smiled. "An answer I like, even if the delivery was a bit too... sycophantic. More sincrere affection would have helped." "Two. Hosiery, especially tights. I really like wearing them. The feel of nylons on my skin is great. Three. Earrings. I do love wearing earrings, especially slightly dangly ones. And number four is that everyone has been nice to me. I think the story of the giving up on accountancy has got a bit of sympathy. From Vari at least." "Hmm. A respectable list. I knew earrings would be on the list, just by the way you look at them when deciding which ones to use and play with them when you're thinking. When you get you first pay, you can buy some more. I was not expecting tights to be on it. I might let Ash wear tights as well, seeing as he finds them so nice." Ash blushed, but Suranya continued. "Now for the negatives, please." "One. Putting on make-up. It takes too long. Two. When I am on the bus to work, I still feel that people are looking at me because they have guessed who I am." "Number one, true, but you aren't going to pass close scrutiny without it. Number two, you are passing close scrutiny, so forget that one, it is not a problem. There must be a third?" Ash paused before he responded to that prompt. "Three. I worry that my wife looks down on me because of what I am doing." "But it was my original suggestion." "Yes." There was an uncomfortably long pause while Ash waited for Suranya to deny his fears, and Suranya choosing not to do so. It was only interrupted by the waitress bringing their desserts. "I am glad you had the honesty to raise that," said Suranya quietly, but she again did not dismiss Ash's concern. **************** A couple of months later, Nima arrived home to be greeted by a furious Surnaya. She had got used to arriving home after her due to using public transport, but usually the Suranya at home was the same one as had left the office. "Nima! Come into the bedroom. Now!" This did not sound like playacting so Nima gulped. She went through to the bedroom meekly, eyes cast down. "Nima. I am going to business dinner this evening, AS YOU KNOW, and when I went to my drawer to get a new pair of sheer black tights, there were none. They were there Monday before I went away, and now the packaging is in the recycling box. I did not put it there, so it must have been you." She gestured to the stool by her dressing table. "Please kneel down here and lean over the stool." Nima knelt, with a very miserable expression on her face. "You have one minute to explain what happened, but it will excuse nothing." "On Tuesday, whilst you were in Edinburgh, Mel rang and invited Vari and me out for a drink to celebrate the baby being born. When I came home to change, I wanted some sheer 15 denier black tights but could not find any, so I borrowed a pair from you. I did order a replacement online, but they have not been delivered yet." "Stay where you are!" Nima dare not move, but as she breathed, with the ridge on the side of the stool digging into her stomach. This caused her backside to rise and fall, and she felt the lining of her skirt draw up and down across her hosiery around buttocks. It was a very pleasant sensation, the soothing feeling broken as Suranya stormed back into the room. "I have a packet addressed to you that was in today's post. It looks very much as if it may be your order." Suranya opened it, and the ordered tights, plus a couple of other pairs were inside. She stood beside Nima, caressing her hair gently. "So, my problem of this moment is solved," she mused, "but I still have a naughty husband and a moderately functional PA to deal with." Before Nima could make any suggestions, Suranya flipped up Nima's skirt and gave her three rapid and hard raps on the backside with a hairbrush. They were so quick that Nima only had time to squeal at the final one. Her eyes were watering from the blows. "Now, naughty husband, stand up and give me room to do my make up for this evening. Whilst I am doing it, I will have some questions." Nima rose tentatively, rubbing her sore rear end as she did. That was a pleasant sensation too. "Right. Information required. What dress did you wear for your night out?" Suranya demanded. "A long sleeved mustard coloured velvet one, I think we got it in Zara." "That is a bit short and flirty for Nima. Did you have heels with it?" "Yes. Black ones." "Did you look saucy?" Nima hesitated to answer, so Suranya put the words in her mouth. "You think you did, but are shy about admitting it. Was it just you, Mel and Vari?" "No. There were three other friends of Mel there too." "Was it a late one, was Saucy Nima on the pull?" "Ha," snorted Nima, "We just had two or three wines, some nibbles and went home. Mel was quite tired and a couple of her friends were quite Mumsy, in the worst sense." "So you were all dressed up to the nines only to find that the party animals are not big players on a Tuesday night. Did you ask what the baby's name is?" "Yes. Spencer. Poor kid," sighed Nima "Agree with you there. Everyone I have ever met called Spencer has just been a terrible person." The pair of them nodded in silent agreement. "My verdict, Nima, is that I approve of you going out to socialise, I approve of your approach to looking like a normal twenty-five year old woman to do so, and I accept that you did the best as a PA that was possible. But we do not use other people's clothing without permission. Right?" "Yes, sorry," Nima mumbled. She wondered if it would have been the same the other way round, but it was not going to be helpful to ask. He left Suranya to complete her preparation for dinner. ************* it was Monday mid-morning and Nima had got everyone's week organised. It had not taken long to pick up how the whole office worked and she was happy to be an unofficial PA to the other four, although Zari proved perfectly capable of looking after herself, which was foiling Nima's empire building plans. In contrast Sarath got so much bizarre pleasure from going through his document control processes that he was happy to let Nima handle a lot of his other tasks. Feeling pleased with herself, Nima was about to make herself a coffee when an email from Suranya popped up. This was guaranteed to be an annoyance. She opened it before heading for the coffee machine. "Creative writing exercise. Five thousand words about someone in a situation a little like yours. By Friday." Whilst preparing her refreshment she thought about what it meant. "A situation a little like yours" and "creative writing" meant that it had to be fiction and any resemblance to Nima's recent experiences had to be minimal. That, she concluded, should be fairly easy. What Nima had failed to allow for was writer's block, and by Thursday she was regretting not querying why creative writing was suddenly being deemed part of her remit. So Nima thought back to her student days and concluded when completely stuck, your only friend is the internet. She got to work and made her submission on Friday. Monday morning came and as Nima was in the process of getting dressed, Suranya told her that she had a gift for her, and to close her eyes. Nima obeyed. When told to open them, Suranya was beaming broadly, holding up a black corset in front of her. A suspiciously small looking black corset. Suranya helped it onto her and tightened it fiercely. Then she squeezed a bit more. The style was underbust and Nima found it pushing her fake breasts upwards in a way that she was not used to, and was awkward to adapt to when short of breath from the corset. When she had put her normal work clothes over the top, there seemed no purpose to the corset other than forcing her to stand on the bus all the way to work as sitting down would be so uncomfortable. Nima guessed that she was being punished for short comings in her story, and the reason would be made clear when Suranya saw fit. When Nima arrived at work, she raised the seat of her chair and perched awkwardly on the edge until Suranya allowed some relief. At eleven o'clock Nima was summoned into Suranya's office and told to close the door. Suranya brandished a sheaf of paper at her. "This story," she said, "is quite extraordinary." It was obvious from her expression that it was not extraordinary in a good way. "In fact, if I did not know better, because my PA is not supposed to be that silly, is that the person who provided it downloaded two similar tales from the internet and when they merged them either they forgot to align the differences or they did so and closed the document without saving the changes." Nima grimaced, which caused Suranya to smirk at her growing discomfort. Suranya continued to speak whilst perusing the offending paper, like a doctor dealing brusquely with a hypochondriac patient. "I am going to need you to strip down to corset and knickers." "What?" Nima ased incredulously. "Strip to corset and knickers. If you need a hand, just ask." With the tightness of the corset, Nima could not bend enough to finish removing her tights, but all else was possible. When it was done Suranya noticed that Nima's hair had now grown long enough to cover some of her now exposed breast. She also noticed that Nima's flower patterned yellow knickers were not going to match well with what was coming. "First problem. You refer, several times, to the main character, Jennifer, as a looser. I believe you probably meant loser, and one error could be written off as a typing mistake. Four is too many. If you did mean looser, then you never explain what she is looser than. So as a reminder of this inconsistency, I want you to put on this dress, which will only fit because of your new corset." Suranya handed Nima a tiny dress and after she had stepped into it, pulled it up, and zipped her in at the back. Even with the new corset it was a tight fit around the waist, and around the bust too. "That is tight, not looser. Understand? Second problem. Jennifer is described early on as putting in a pair of sapphire stud earrings. In the middle of your tale, these are somehow brushing on her cheek and green, as if she magically conjured up a new set of earrings in the bar. So take your earrings out and put these in." Suranya handed Nima a pair of earrings with a dropping strand of seven green beads. Nima liked them, but not necessarily as workwear. "Next problem. Jennifer's leg wear. It is not mentioned in the text but she must change it every two minutes. In one morning at work she starts with pink opaque tights, then goes to tan pantyhouse, then back to opaques, but in black, then ends up in hold up stockings. And all before lunch. When does she find any time to do what she is employed to do? Presuming she at least ended up where you wanted her, put these on." Nima took a new pair of lace topped black hold ups from Suranya, who pointedly did not help her put them on. Once Nima had struggled through getting into them, she realised that the dress was not really as long as she would like for such legwear. "Problem four. Jennifer likes to parade around in heals, H-E-A-L-S. Heals is the act of someone curing things. Shoes have heels, H-E-E-L-S. Like the first issue, one error would have been a notable typing mistake, but you start by spelling it correctly, get in wrong several times, then go back to being right. As you will now have guessed, I have some shoes for you to wear as a reminder of what you did wrong." Suranya handed Nima a bag with a shoebox in it. She opened the box and was faced by a pair of patent black pumps with five inch heels. They were much higher than she was used to dealing with. Suranya gestured for her to put them on, which Nima did whilst initially seated. She got up and took a few tentative strides around the room as she adapted to them. Wearing heels of some description had been her norm for some time, so it did not take long to get the hang of it. "Anything else?" Suranya enquired, seeing Nima still in the room. "Well, apart from those things, did you enjoy the story?" "Was Jennifer supposed to be a whining, self-indulgent dimwit, who thought every inconvenience in life was a personal insult, rather than just what we all put up with?" "She absolutely was," nodded Nima. "Then it had potential. Now I need you to head off to the dry cleaners and pick up those two skirts and that coat for me. There is a raincoat that goes with the outfit on the rack." Nima walked over and inspected the coat. It was short, as much as the dress, and had the same deep v-neck as the dress. As coats go, it was not going to bring much coverage. She put it on and was not impressed. Suranya looked up, her face fixed in deep thought. After rummaging in her bag briefly she handed Nima a lipstick and told her to use it instead. Nima removed the cap and looked slightly disdainfully at the bright red colour. She returned her gaze to Suranya, who raised an eyebrow. Nima dutifully wiped off her existing lipstick and replaced it with the red, a task that had now become easy for her with the aid of a hand mirror. "Good," Suranya told her, "now toddle off and pick up my dry cleaning." Nima found that she could cope with the heels, short dress and hold ups as long as she walked carefully, but it did mean that the short walk to shop was ging to take longer than usual. As she approached the dry cleaner's she let out a small inner groan as she noticed that the owners' son, George, was behind the counter. He was a quiet lad with a slight stammer, and Nima was fairly certain that he fancied her. She took a deep breath before going into the shop. "Hi, George, I've got some dry cleaning to pick up." George's eyes looked ready ready to burst out of his head on stalks, cartoon-style. "Errrr, sure, Nima. I'll just go and find them." He disappeared to the back of the shop briefly. "Can you give us another ten minutes?" he asked, an irrelevant question as Nima had no choice. "Sure, I'll pop next door and grab a coffee. Would you like one?" Being by now totally tongue-tied, George nodded. Nima returned shortly afterwards with the drinks. She did not fancy hanging around on the tall heels, so looked for somewhere to sit. There were no chairs so she perched on the edge of the counter. She could not arrange the hem of the dress to cover the lace top of the hold ups. That did not help George at all, but as the silence was becoming awkward, he managed to get a line out. "Nima, would you like to come to the cinema one evening this week?" Nima felt that this had been quite hard work for him to ask, so made sure not to be dismissive or rude. "George, if you know of a film where apparently reasonable boss of the company, who is really a terrible tyrant, gets overthrown by the workforce, I am up for it." As she was speaking, George's mother came into the shop with an armful of garments. "Oooh, have you been told off by the boss?" she asked. Before there was a response, she looked Nima's outfit up and down and continued. "No need to answer, I can see it's a yes." "Hi, Mrs Kelesidou. Yes, I fell foul of her." "What happened." Nima stared forlornly at the bright red lipstick smudge on her coffee cup. "Sometimes, to get on business, you have to be prepared to do whatever is asked of you," Nima mused, "but sometimes it takes more time and effort than you imagined."