The Journal of Darin TaylorChapter 4
- 3 years ago
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As you can imagine, Mom was devastated. She didn't report the rapes because she was afraid that Chad was right about having staged alibis for the entire club. If they had planned her seduction and rape so carefully, it made sense they would have arranged alibis of some sort as well. Besides, all their parents had money and could afford the best lawyers. Her parents were blue collar with no social standing. Ultimately it would come down to her word against theirs -- the shrinking violet, blue collar girl against the wealthy, most popular boys in school. And they would argue why rape plain Sharee when, as popular, handsome football players, they could get almost any girl they wanted?
So she kept quiet, returned to school and tried to get on with her life, but she saw the looks, at first only from the boys in the club, but for all that is said about girls being so talkative, boys are much more likely to brag about their conquests than girls. So it wasn't long before both the girls and boys (even those not in the club), began giving her knowing looks and the snickering behind her back began along with passing remarks and lewd proposals left in her locker.
She withdrew even further, but again her naivety was her downfall. Two different boys asked her out. Neither was in the club and Mom thought they were sincere. However each soon showed he was after only one thing. Her self esteem in the pits, she acquiesced, thinking that perhaps Chad was right, perhaps the only thing she had to offer a boy was what was between her legs. Both boys deserted her as soon as they got what they wanted and this hastened Mom acquiring the reputation of slut. At last realizing her mistake she rejected several more offers for "dates" but by then the damage was done. Everyone in school regarded her as nothing more than a cheap whore. Between her own withdrawal and being ostracized by the other students, she became a virtual outcast -- no friends and the only interest shown in her was by boys who simply wanted in her pants.
When she missed her second period, she took a test which confirmed her worst fears. Her parents were fundamentalist religious zealots and she saw no way she could tell them, so she finally swallowed her pride and approached Chad one day after school, telling him of her predicament.
"Why the hell do you think I'd care?"
"It might be yours."
"Yeah, might be, but with the number of dicks you've had in you it could be almost anybody's."
The words stung and these were the days just before DNA paternity tests had arrived on the scene, so while blood tests could rule out candidates as the father, they could not absolutely verify a particular boy as the father either.
"I thought you might feel a responsibility."
"For what? You dumb slut, you put out in the back of a car and then gang banged six guys the following night."
"I was raped!"
"That's your story. As far as we're concerned you asked for it and we gave it to you."
"Then ... you won't help?"
"Help? Sure I'll help. I've give you some advice. Dump the thing. Get rid of it."
"An ... an ... abortion?"
"Unless you want to be saddled with a kid for the rest of your life!"
"I ... I just couldn't."
"Suit yourself but you aren't going to hang this around my neck or any of the other guys either. You do what you want, but leave us out of it! Now get the hell away from me!"
Finally in desperation Mom told her parents who reacted just as you would expect. They called her a whore and kicked her out.
I guess it was a good thing for me, but Mom took some clothes, some money that one of her school girlfriends gave her and moved to Seattle. I have asked her several times why Seattle to which she always replies, "Why not Seattle?"
She stayed in a shelter for a while then got a job in a drug store where she worked until I was born. After that she found a job in a supermarket and later she worked for a veterinarian, got her G.E.D. and finally as went to work as a secretary for an engineering company.
While I was growing up there were a few guys who showed some interest but never for very long when they found out she had a kid. After I arrived her figure began filing out and, call me biased, she grew into a really good looking woman. Most of the guys she met used her the same way the boys in school had done. They showed her some attention just long enough to get her into bed, then split. She just never seemed to learn. Actually, it isn't that Mom's dumb. She's just so naive that she wants to believe what people tell her. As a result, even now, she can be manipulated if you know what buttons to push.
Growing up, I saw her try, time after time, to find love with these guys only to be screwed silly then dumped. Each time her heart was broken her self confidence was chipped away.
It was pretty close to my twelfth birthday that I first got the urge. She had met this guy named Pete who, I could tell, even at twelve, was hanging around just to get a little. Oh, he took us to a circus once and we went to the movies a few times, but while he tolerated me, it was Mom and that body of hers he was after. Mom thought, though, that he might be the one and before long Pete was a near permanent fixture at our apartment. He said he was a maritime sailor but in the several months we knew him I never saw him go near a ship. Anyway, the apartment was small, our bedrooms were next to each other and the walls were paper thin. I had been hearing Mom and Pete moaning and groaning late at night for some time. I asked one of my friends at school who told me about the birds and bees and so my newfound knowledge combined with my natural curiosity and pretty soon I worked up the courage to find out what those noises were all about.
My name is Darin Taylor. I started a journal shortly after I turned twelve. The journal itself is just a collection of bits and pieces of my thoughts and ideas about things that have happened to me and my mom. I have kept the journal secret, but perhaps one day someone else my age may use what I have learned, so I have rewritten it as a continuous narrative. I just turned seventeen a few days ago. I received a scholarship to the university and will be starting college in a few weeks. This...
It happened on a Friday evening. I had been at the mall with some friends and got home about eleven. I noticed Pete's car was absent from the driveway, a rare occurrence, when I walked up to the front door. I usually went directly to my room and checked on Mom and Pete through the peephole, but tonight I thought I heard sobs coming from the front room. I looked in and saw Mom, sitting on the couch, head in her hands, trying unsuccessfully to stop the tears. "Mom, what's the matter?" I...
So I began spying regularly on Mom and Pete. While Pete had not exactly moved in with us, his overnights grew more frequent so he and I were both busy getting our jollies. I may have been only twelve, but I was no dummy. I knew that if I tried to oust Pete in some way it could very well backfire, but even more important was the fact that I knew I wasn't ready. Let's face it, I wasn't big enough (if you know what I mean) and I certainly didn't have even the first notion of how to seduce a...
As I expected the next few weeks were an almost constant fuck fest. I never had to ask for it at all. The moment I arrived from school or she arrived from work she was all over me, just couldn't get enough. One evening we were on the couch watching TV. While I was sitting up, she was stretched out with her head in my lap. Remembering how great it had been with Monica, I had told Mom that when we were alone in the house I wanted her to wear nothing but thongs. She obliged quite willingly,...
The deal was sealed a week later when the transmission of the car went out and the hot water heater blew on the same day (and before you ask, I had nothing to do with either). It was just one of those coincidences which couldn't have happened at a worse time (at least for Mom). That night we talked over dinner. "I ... I just don't know what to do," she said, tears of desperation welling. "Look, why don't you just TRY my idea for a while, long enough to get out from under this current...
It took almost two months and the raise was not quite as much as she had been promised, but mom did begin to see a somewhat larger paycheck at the end of each week. In the meantime she and Terry continued meeting at out of the way motels in and out of town. He, of course, hinted at an even larger raise, which kept Mom showing up for their weekly and sometimes biweekly trysts. I encouraged her as well, as I needed some time of my own. In all honesty Mom is one of the most beautiful women...
And so our fledgling "business" prospered and before long I was a senior. There was no end to the number of guys who wanted that first or best experience. Mom still wanted to limit visits to three or four a week so we talked about how to make more money (the income was steady but it still meant only a modest increase in monthly income) and we both wanted her to be able to quit her daytime job. We talked about charging more but a lot of the guys were pushing it to afford the hundred. So we...
And so here I am, almost two years later about to leave for college. With me away Vanessa will be taking over handling the finances and while Mom says how much she'll miss me (especially at night) she is consoled by the fact that this means she and Vanessa will be sleeping together every night. I got a scholarship, but by now we've been able to put back a nice little nest egg. I'm majoring in business because I have every intention of eventually returning to continue running our little...
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