The Penis Study
Did I ever tell you about the time I measured 5000 penises? And met my wife? My Ph.D. thesis in physiology wasn't exactly Nobel Prize material, and I was growing desperate for a job when my thesis adviser at MU called me in. "Mark," he said, "I have a research program for you. Fully funded. It might last indefinitely." There had to be something wrong with it, of course. And there was. I looked a question at him. "It's funded by Sir Lance-A-Lot. You know, the condom manufacturers,"...