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Cat and Mouse: The Baby By Bluto News item on Telemundo (translated from the Spanish). "Hola, this is Jaun Pegar Fantasia with news from South America: Scattered reports are coming in now of a disaster on the Pacific Coast of Peru. The small town of Puerto Diego has been destroyed with an uncertain loss of life. Helicopter video shows the utter destruction visited on the village from what one survivor called, and I'm not making this up, folks, 'a giant, the biggest man I have ever seen.' "According to one eyewitness, the 'giant' entered a local bar and ordered a Shirley Temple, an alcohol-free drink preferred by white, Anglo-Saxon females. The bartender and several patrons made the unwise decision to poke fun at the 'giant' for his choice of drink and he went ballistic, wrecking the bar and destroying everything in his path. Local law enforcement officials were helpless, even though they were equipped with automatic weapons and hand grenades." Voice of Nolberto Solano, another eyewitness: "It was crazy! They were firing away at this big dude and I know they hit him but it was like they were shooting blanks. He must have been eight feet tall and I swear he didn't have a nose." "After wrecking the town the 'giant' was last seen running for the Pacific Ocean in advance of several national guard units that had been dispatched because of the disturbance. No boats were seen leaving the dock but the 'giant' still apparently escaped, as no one has seen him since. There have been no other reported sightings of this 'giant' in the region." WEEK TWO - Gaby Doltry could not believe her eyes. The Cat, Katherine Filin, her fellow Protector, was contentedly nursing a little baby, whom she had just been informed was another Protector, The Mouse aka Mick Montana. "Nicky, why do you think this is the Mouse? How did this happen? Just what the hell is going on?" "Mick called me as soon as you three got back from the Philippines," said Nicky Greao, Montana's oldest friend. "He was excited about the success of your mission and said the Philippine Government gave each of you a gold medal and said for me to come over the next day to see his medal after he and Katherine took care of some personal business. I, ah, kinda had an idea what that personal business might be, so I made sure to call before coming over the next day. I got no answer all day, so I waited one more day. Still no answer. I called early the third day and when I still got no answer I decided to come over here and see for myself what was going on." Nicky paused for a moment and glanced at Cat, who continued to sit and nurse, smiling like she had not a care in the world. "The door was unlocked so I walked right in and there sat Katherine, just as you see her now. 'Where's Mick and where'd that baby come from?' I asked. She gave me that goofy grin and said 'Mickey and I had sex, wonderful sex, and this is Mickey's baby.'" "Oh God, Mick was worried that he was spending too much time pretending to be a girl, too much time playing Mouse, worried that he was losing his male identity. I actually encouraged him to have sex with Katherine to prove to himself that he was a real man. I didn't know it would do this to him!" "But what proof do you have that that's Mouse?" the Medium said. "You just told me that Cat said it was Mick's baby. Couldn't that be the case?" "As far as I know they only had sex that one time and that was less than two weeks ago. I don't know what her problem is but Katherine has been spaced out all week. Sometimes she says the baby is Mick, sometimes that it's Mick's baby. But Mick is nowhere to be found. None of his stuff is missing and there is no way he'd leave town and abandon his own baby if he knew he had one. I even called Mick's folks and they haven't heard from him in weeks. Besides, Katherine is magic, isn't she? Doesn't she turn into a demon and eat people?" As Gaby pondered how Nicky got wind of that bit of information there was a knock on the door. Without waiting for an answer the visitor came in. It was a tall, burly person wearing a tasteful flower print dress and sensible shoes. The person was carrying four heavy plastic bags full of diapers, baby powder and other infant care items, as well as several dozen cans of cat food and some fruit. "Jeez, if I knew there wuz someone here besides Katherine I would have had yous come down and help me," the person said, as the bags were dumped in the middle of the living room floor. "Oh, sorry miss, my name is Tony Bass and I am so happy to make your acquaintance." Gaby stood open-mouthed as she shook hands with the ex-mobster. While the voice was still undeniably that of a man, everything else advertised extreme gender confusion. Tony's face was smooth and hair- free and very tastefully made up. His hair was down to his shoulders, thanks to extensions, and permed very smartly. His arms were still fairly thick, but he was starting to show a real contrast between his chest and waist measurements. He wore no padding, but was already supporting a C-cup bra and developing a very pleasing ass. Under the flowing dress he wore some cute red panties and, since he still lacked the money to buy an artificial penis, there was no chance of any nasty bulges ruining the smooth effect. "Thank you so much for the diapers, Tony dear," Cat said, from her chair. "I swear, my little Micki seems to get bigger by the hour. The diapers you brought us yesterday barely fit at all now and she's a darling little crap machine." Tony grunted in Cat's general direction and then set about taking all the items he'd brought and putting them in their proper places. The baby had finally eaten its fill and, after putting away her still swollen breast, Cat put it on her shoulder and delicately patted its back until it gave a loud burp. She then took one of the new diapers and deftly changed the baby on the living room couch. Gaby could see that there was no doubt about this being a female baby. "Jesus, Nicky," she said. "I'm going into transgender overload! What makes you so sure this baby girl used to be a man? And how'd you know about Cat?" "See Tony there? He used to be all man too, until he had sex with Katherine. She bit his dick off and then a little later he had to have his balls cut off too because of cancer, cancer he didn't have a trace of until he fucked her. You see, Tony is a member of the Gamboli family and so am I." Gaby gasped once more. "Yeah, Mick and Katherine never told me she was the monster who rubbed out so many of my family members. And Tony never told me exactly how he lost his dick. Ms. Medium, I might not be a detective or a psychic, but I ain't dumb. I'd pretty much figured out who Katherine really was a long time ago. I mean, come on, she's got a tail for the love a God, but I never told Mick I knew because I figured he'd tell me when he thought the time was right. He probably was afraid I'd hate Katherine because of what she did to my relatives, but, hey, they were all goombas; they knew what could happen to them in that business. But what I didn't realize was that having sex with Katherine does strange things to a man." Nicky opened a drawer in a small end table and fished out a copy of an article from "The New York Times." He handed it to Gaby and continued speaking. "I got this from a customer at my boutique a few weeks ago. Because of the business I'm in I often get clips and articles about gender change issues and I usually keep them on file. According to this article, every man who had sex with the "porn star" wound up with extreme sexual dysfunction, but I didn't put two and two together until after Mick and Katherine did it. I showed it to Tony and he confessed that it was indeed talking about something that happened while the family was trying to kill Katherine for murdering family members." "I been tryin' to tell Nicky about the cat woman for a long time," Tony said, as he busied himself in the kitchen, making some treats for everyone. "But something always seemed to interfere before I could get the words out." He brought a tray of cookies and tasty appetizers and set it on the living room table. For Cat he had made Ritz Crackers topped with cat food and an olive. She consumed all of them with great relish. "Mmmm, these are good, Tony dear," she said, while licking her lips. "I'm sorry I ate your dick, hon, really I am. But I hadn't had a bite in a long time and it was right there in my mouth." Tony picked up the baby from Cat and gleefully tossed it in the air. The baby squealed and laughed and hugged Aunt Tony, who didn't seem the least bit disturbed by what Cat had just said. "Oh hell, easy come, easy go. I had a lota fun wit' little Tony over the years, but when ya gotta go, ya gotta go. Besides, the way Nicky figures it, if I hadn't been stuck in the hospital back then, I'd have probably been killed with everyone else at Uncle Salvatore's house when you visited there." Gaby felt like she had inadvertently walked into a roadshow production of "Alice In Wonderland," when she suddenly remembered the main reason for her visit. "Cat, Nightman told me if you and Mouse don't show up for the meeting tomorrow he's going to have the both of you kicked out of The Protectors. He's really sore that you two missed the fight we had last week with The Destroyers when they robbed Madison Square Garden." "Sorry Hon, but I can't leave my little Micki for anything. Part of my animal instincts, I guess." "Look, we'll help you take care of Mickey. I'm sure he wouldn't want to get thrown out of The Protectors when it wasn't his fault. He always told me being a Protector was, like, his fondest dream and junk. And don't forget, if they kick you out, there goes your stipend." "Wellll." "And think how happy Robichaux will be if you're booted out." "That does it! We'll be there!" *** The regular Protectors meeting was well-attended this week. In addition to trying out potential new members for the first time in months, it was rumored a couple of current members were in danger of being kicked out on their tails. Several members were still hurting from their last encounter with The Destroyers, especially The Arrow, who was in a full body cast as a result of trying to take on the Weapons Master, the Blue Ninja and EXO2 by himself. They beat him to within an inch of his life and it would be a long time before he was ready for action again. "They sneaked up on me, damn it, otherwise ah'd have taken them easy," he said, as they hauled him to his place on the dais. "If that dam' Cat and Mouse had been dare, we could 'a won." The Medium was afraid that was the general sentiment and knew it would be a difficult job keeping Cat and Mouse in the group. The problem, of course, was figuring out how much the Protectors, and the general public, needed to know about the true situation. She had persuaded Cat to come and speak for Mouse and herself, but it wasn't easy. Because her breasts were so swollen with milk, Cat couldn't put on her skin-tight costume. So she wore just her mask, a black T-shirt and some yellow Capri pants to the meeting. Like a dutiful mother, she carried the baby in a backpack. Nicky and Tony also came along to help with baby if Cat got tied up. Both of them wore full hoods with openings for their eyes and noses. Nicky resisted the urge to wear a costume he had whipped up for himself a while back and just had on his usual street clothes, while Tony wore a white blouse and a chic blue skirt that came to mid-knee, along with pantyhose and 3" heels. "Hey, Tony, is it OK if I ask you something?" Gaby asked. "Yeah, what?" "Well, it's none of my business but, Nicky told me you work for him at a transsexual boutique. I know you wear women's clothing for a living, but why are you wearing them now when you don't have to?" "S' funny," Tony said, as he checked out his finery as if seeing it for the first time. "Before we came here tonight I had set out a white shirt, some gabardine slacks and some brown loafers to wear. Then, when we get here I'm wearing this stuff. Isn't that odd? I sure don't remember putting on this pink lipstick either. On da other hand, I have to wear a bra and I don't got no dick or balls, so what should I do?" Gaby had no time to ponder that question because the meeting was being called to order and she needed to take her place on the stage. She took a seat next to Cat, who had the baby on her lap, sound asleep. On Cat's other side was The Girl Goliath, who was fascinated by the baby. It was all she could do to refrain from sweeping the child up in her muscular arms. "Oooo, what a beautiful baby," she cooed. "You and the father must be very proud, Cat." "Oh yes we are, very," Cat said, her goofy grin the only part of her face visible because of the mask. After quickly covering a few minor matters, Nightman got into the meat of the meeting. "We now must consider the recent actions, or, non-actions, as the case may be, of our two newest members, The Cat and The Mouse. The Medium assures me that the lady on the dais with the baby is The Cat, although she is out of uniform. So I ask you, Cat, where is The Mouse?" "As ya'll know our Daddy died tragically in Eastern Europe in a pet food explosion some years ago. The country was under a communist government at that time and sis and ah thought it best to flee when we got the chance. Now that they have a more democratic government ovah there, we decided that it was time to try to get our hands on Daddy's estate, which is valued in the millions. Mah dear sister volunteered to go and take care of the legalities, which could take months, ah am told." Gaby was proud. The hitherto almost-catatonic-seeming Cat had the excuse they'd cooked up down to a "T." Now if only she didn't start freelancing. "Well, why the hell didn't youra sista tell us before she took off for Europe? And where have you been for the past two weeks?" The Arrow asked, from his wheelchair. "And for that matter, just what 'Eastern European' country are we talkin' about heah? Bullshitastine?" Perhaps it was the sound of Robichaux's voice that did it but the baby chose just that instant to start bawling. Without a moment's hesitation the smiling Cat lifted her T-shirt, took out one of her swollen breasts, stuck the huge nipple in the baby's mouth and let it happily suck away. The Girl Goliath sighed and giggled like a schoolgirl, while Mr. Fix-it, who had been praying to God for something like this to happen once he realized what the situation was with Cat and the baby, pursed his lips and broke into a heavy sweat. The cameraman covering the event for C-span used his zoom lens to get a tight close-up of the action, while telephones all over the city started buzzing. "Hey, stop dat!" Robichaux fumed. "In the name of decency, woman, put yoah titty back in yoah shirt and answer mah questions!" "Ah, shame on you, Arrow," Girl Goliath said, in a rare public outburst. "What is indecent about a woman feeding her baby? Only in this crazy country do you make a woman's breasts a sexual obsession, and then get upset when they are used for what nature intended them. Women nurse their babies in public in my country all the time and nobody makes a big deal about it." The women in the audience applauded. "But, but, but we're on live TV," Robichaux sputtered. "And dat woman's breasts are obscene. Look how big dey are, damn it." Nightman pounded his mallet into the dais. "People, this is a meeting of The Protectors, not a debate at the LaLeche League. Ms. Cat, will you please answer The Arrow's questions." But before Cat could speak, the Medium shouted at the top of her lungs: "Take cover everyone, now!" The next second an explosion rocked the entire building. "What the hell?" said Nancy Miller, Home Security liaison and real leader of The Protectors. "We're under attack, Mam," said one of the security guards scurrying to shield her from harm. "I believe The Destroyers are striking again." "Medium, why didn't you give us a little more warning about this?" Nightman asked, as another explosion shook the building, knocking loose plaster and some light fixtures from the ceiling as panicked members of the audience dove for cover. "I keep telling you I have no control over my visions, dig? Sometimes I can see junk like this coming and sometimes I can't." Amid all the confusion, Cat gently plucked her nipple out of the baby's greedy mouth and replaced it with a pacifier before she could start crying again. She leaped off the stage and gave the baby to the cowering Tony and Nicky. "Make sure Micki comes to no harm," she said, in tones that let the two babysitters know there was an "or else" attached. Then, after handing them her chunky sandals as well, she grabbed Gaby with one arm and sped barefoot to the roof to see what was going on. The two explosions were caused by an unmanned airplane, the type that had been used in the Second Iraq War with great success. It had accurately targeted and taken out two of the building's automatic defense systems with its missiles and was positioning itself for a third run. "Hey, isn't a weapon like that exclusively for the armed forces?" Cat said, as she braced for action. "Yes," said Mr. Fix-it, who had just joined Cat and Gaby on the roof. "That is strictly military ordinance, but then, so are most of the other weapons the Destroyers use. How are they getting this stuff?" Cat didn't try to answer because she figured the pilotless plane was close enough. She sprung from the roof to the fast-moving drone and grabbed it with one hand. "That woman is crazy," the Medium said. Cat had leaped without a clear idea how to stop the plane, but her added weight was enough to take it off course. Then she ripped off the tail and rudder to make sure and jumped to a nearby utility pole. The robot plane hit the street and exploded with a ball of flame, but the attack wasn't over yet. Two stripped down, remote controlled jeeps came rumbling down the street in front of Protectors HQ. They were both loaded with surface- to-surface missiles and their target was obvious. Small-arms fire erupted from the HQ's security guards, but they did little damage to the converted vehicles. "Looks like the Destroyers have gotten cagey," Cat thought. "None of them want to risk facing me personally so they let remote-controlled robots do the dirty work. But I'll bet someone is around here to guide the attack on scene." With that, Cat tested the air with her more than human sense of smell and soon sniffed up a familiar scent. The Weapons Master was on the top of a nearby four-story building, watching the attack with a pair of binoculars and relaying results and corrections to Junk Yard Sal with a two-way radio. "We are just about in position for the second phase of the attack," he said. "In 30 seconds you can launch missiles at their targets." "But what about the cat woman?" Sal replied. "She took out the drone, where is she now? I knew we should have canceled the attack when we found out she was going to attend the meeting. The whole purpose of attacking now was to get it done while she and The Mouse were out of action." "Haw, coward," Weapons Master barked. "I am the one in the field, I am the one taking the risk. You always stay back at HQ and play with your toys while we take the risks. Well, this plan is going to succeed, Cat or no Cat, and if she tries to interfere I will take care of the pizda like we took care of the Arrow last time." "You know, the Arrow is an asshole, but he is mah teammate and I don't like the idea of three of you goons ganging up on mah teammate, you hear?" The Weapons Master looked up from his binoculars and there stood Cat, blocking out the sun. He mumbled "hivno" as he scrambled for his Glock, but before it was halfway out of its holster Cat landed an uppercut to his chinguard that sent him stumbling drunkenly backwards and right off the roof. Cat hadn't meant for that to happen and leaped to the ground to examine his squashed form. "He's still alive, but he won't be ambushing anyone else anytime soon," she told Gaby over the Protectors' communication system. "Ah shore need to stop those rocket launchers now." She scrambled back up to the roof and grabbed the Weapons Master's RPG (rocket-propelled grenade) launcher. Taking careful aim, she sent a grenade into the closest jeep and it went up with a huge explosion. The shock wave from the blast was enough to flip the other jeep over just as its missiles fired, causing another tremendous explosion and minimal damage to Protectors HQ. Area residents, however, would have quite a bone to pick with the government after this. Cat smiled at her good work, but that smile turned to a frown when she went back to where she had left the Weapons Master and found him gone. "There's no way he made off on his own power," she told the Medium. "He was too seriously injured. They must have had another Destroyer on scene, but ah didn't detect him or her. Damn." "It was probably EXO1, Cat," the Medium said. "She's fast enough to get in and out without being detected." Meanwhile, Nicky and Tony were taking care of a little crisis of their own. "Yeah, there was a microwave in the kitchen, Nicky, so I got this bottle all warmed up for our girl. That Medium is smart. She figured it would be a good idea for Cat to express some breast milk for an emergency. How are you doin'?" "I got her cleaned up, Tony, and put a fresh diaper on her. Jesus, Tony, have you noticed she's starting to grow a little tail? And her baby teeth are coming in and they are sharp as razors." "Yeah, she's already startin' to chew some holes in dis plastic nipple," Tony said, as he sat down to get comfortable while the baby happily sucked away. "Ye gods, don't that hurt Cat when she nurses her?" "Cat doesn't feel things the way us mere humans do, Tony, or hadn't you noticed? You seem awfully concerned about her welfare, considering what she did to you." The ex-wiseguy paused for a moment before answering. Nicky couldn't see the expression on his face because of the hood, but he could tell his cousin was in deep thought. "Ya know, I never bottle-fed any of my three kids, Nicky, not once. I never changed a diaper, never told dem a bedtime story or nothing. I was a bad father and a bad person, just like you tol' me when dey almost locked me away. I've committed murder, Nicky, I've rubbed out four men, personal. Yeah, it was all part a' the rackets, but it was still murder. I shoulda gotten the death sentence. Now, thanks to Cat, my dick and my balls is gone. Oh you bet, I was mad at her at first. I wanted to kill da bitch. But now...maybe it's the meds, the hormones, the counseling, whatever, but I don't blame Katherine for what happened. Hell, I fucked her six times while we had her tied down. I just feel like, maybe, I'm only getting what I deserve." "Well, be careful what you say around here, Tony. They got all kinds of security cameras and listening devices in operation. I wouldn't say anything about murders here." "Yeah, maybe you're right. Dat Arrow guy in the wheelchair hasn't taken his eyes off us all night." The Arrow had indeed been keeping a close watch on the babysitters, but not for the reasons they may have thought. "Hey, Dick," he said to one of the security guards assigned to Nancy Miller. "Who's dat tall woman over dere with the Cat's baby?" "What, the one with the hood over her head?" Dick said. "Don't really know anything about her, sir. She's a personal guest of the Cat and as long as the Cat is a Protector she's allowed two visitors to these meetings and she doesn't have to provide any information on them. However, I did hear the Medium call her Toni." "Toni, eh? Dat's a cute name, yes indeed, a real cute name." It took another half hour for the meeting to resume. Because the meeting room took such a beating from the assault, and it was a nice day anyhow, the rest of the meeting took place on the park-like back lawn. "All right Ms. Cat, the Arrow had asked you several important questions before we were interrupted," Nightman said, as soon as the meeting was called back to order. At that, Robichaux painfully raised his hand. "Well now, seein' as how the Cat here saved our bacon dis time, dat, to me, kind a makes up for missin' out on the last go-round wit de Destroyers," he said. "Ah wit'draw mah questions and ah say let us wait until little Mouse returns to answer questions about herself. After all, ah was the one most grievously injured last time and ah am ready to forgive and forget." Nightman was caught completely off guard by this reversal on the part of the Arrow. He wanted those questions answered himself, but agreed that this probably wasn't the time or place. "Ms. Cat, can we depend on you to answer the Protectors' summons from now on? "Ah will do mah best, Nightman. Now that ah've got a breast pump ah don't have to be with the little one 24/7 anymore, so it really shouldn't be a problem." "That's good enough for me. Due to the destruction and the unsafe condition of the HQ, we will postpone tryouts until further notice. I declare this meeting adjourned." With that, the Protectors bid each other good-bye and left to pursue their individual lives. As Cat passed Robichaux, he motioned for her to stop. "Ah heard what you told the Weapons Master and ah want to thank you." "Because ah called you an asshole?" "No, dam' it, because you consider me a teammate. Ah know you an' ah got off on kind 'a the wrong foot, but, maybe things can change now." Cat turned and hugged the ailing Arrow, making sure not to crack his cast. When she was done, Robichaux placed a folded piece of paper in her hand. "What's dis?" she asked. "Dat is mah private phone number," he said. "Please give it to Toni and ask her, if she doesn't mind, to give me a call sometime. Thanks." *** Three days later Cat and Gaby were once again going to see the Ole Perfesser at his Spanish Harlem home. It was almost two weeks since the babyfication of Mick and some changes were definitely taking place. The baby was acting much more independent now and wasn't too interested in being carried around in a backpack. She still nursed at Cat's breast, but seemed to be rebelling against that too, sometimes biting Cat's nipple so hard with her sharp little cat teeth that she drew blood. All in all, the baby was showing signs of entering the "terrible twos" in less than two weeks and even the devoted Cat was beginning to tire of her "daughter's" behavior. "I swear, if the little hell-raiser bites me like that again, I'm going to swat her a good one," Cat said, as she rubbed her sore nipple before putting it away after Micki's latest feeding. "Don't you know mommy's milk is the best thing in the world for you, Honey? Why else do you think you're growing up so big and strong?" Little Micki made a huffing noise, closed her eyes and folded her arms in front of her chest. Both Cat and Gaby went all goo-goo with just how cute that looked. Micki was dressed in a pink pinafore decorated with cats and dogs. Her thick black hair was done up in several pink ribbons and she wore pink crinkled panties. She had potty- trained herself two days ago, so all the disposable diapers had been donated to Goodwill. Her legs were bare because of the summer heat, so she wore pink Strawberry Shortcake socks to go with her shiny patent- leather Mary Janes. Her tail was still small enough so that it was simply tucked under her dress. "Yeah, like that is something, you know? How big she's getting. I mean, yeah, like, this is magic and some junk, but, Jeez, she's like doubled her bodyweight in less than a week. And she seems a lot older too. She'll be talking before you know it. Do you have any idea what's going on here, Cat?" Cat's eyes got a far-away look that Gaby had seen often in the past two weeks. "All I know is my darling Micki will grow up healthy and strong if she listens to her mommy and does everything I say. I must nurse her at least three more weeks to make sure." "I wonder where she got that idea?" Gaby thought, as they left the car. Little Micki insisted on walking to the building herself (she started walking yesterday) and the two adults indulgently followed behind. It was during this long perambulation that a now-familiar local made his appearance. "Aha, Cat, you bitch, don't you be thinkin' you can sneak into my neighborhood wit'out me knowin' it." Cat had totally forgone a costume this time, but a blind man could tell it was her. Her only concession to a secret identity was the large Channel sunglasses she wore. She dressed in a leather motorcycle blouse that zipped down the front for easy access and a pair of skin- tight leather slacks with a hole in the back for her tail. About the only casual aspect of her outfit were her size 18 Reeboks. "Hermoso! Old buddy!" Cat said cheerfully. "How you doing, pal? Where's your posse?" "I ain't got no posse no more, filthy bitch!" Hermoso said, as he shook with emotion. "Everybody laughs at the Broncos now. Nobody wants to join up. And it's all because of you." With that, Hermoso whipped a .45 Smith and Wesson from the back of his pants. He had placed himself between the heroes and the Ole Perfeser's building and he was closest to the baby. He aimed the powerful weapon at Micki's head. "Yeah, oh yeah, bitch, now I got you where I want you. I know this is your little bastard. I seen you wit' your ugly titty stuck in her mouth on the TV. So, you got some dumb alleycat to fuck you, huh? How'd he get around the stink, eh?" Cat began to tense, Gaby readied herself for action. Forgotten at the moment was baby Micki, who had folded her arms AND raised her left eyebrow. She started to emit a soft growl as she stared at Hermoso's gun hand. "Come on chichas, what you gonna do? Either I kill the little bastard or you kill me and the way I see it, I win either way because I hate this fucking life I'm living and...SON OF A BITCH!" With an angry snarl, baby Micki had leaped on Hermoso's arm and bitten a big plug out of his hand, forcing him to drop the .45 as he howled in pain. She turned into a little pink blur as she ripped and clawed her way over every inch of the gang leader's body. Hair and pieces of clothing were still falling to the ground when Micki stopped and Hermoso stood quivering in bloody tatters. He looked as if he'd been locked in a tiger cage by mistake. Micki spat a piece of Hermoso's ponytail out of her mouth, went "humph" and continued waddling to the Perfesser's door. The whole thing took about three seconds. "Well, I'd thought of about a dozen ways we could have stopped him before he hurt Micki, but that wasn't one of them," Gaby said. "Do you want to call the ambulance or should I?" "Amazing! Magnifico!" "Oh, oh Cat, it's your number one fan, fer shur," Gaby said, as Diego ran and embraced Micki. "What a baby!" he yelled, as he swung her in circles and tossed her in the air. "You are going to be as great as your mother some day!" "Stop throwing her around like that, Diego. You're going to make her sick." Lupe pulled on her cousin's pants leg to make him stop, but the giggling Micki didn't seem to mind at all. Diego finally returned Micki to terra firma, where Lupe hugged her like a long lost sister. (Author's continuity note -- Yes, I said Diego was Lupe's brother before, but I made a mistake, OK? Lupe is an only child -- Bluto) "Ah, what a pretty little girl you are, muy bonita. Come Micki, I have some clothes that don't fit me anymore and Aunt Alabreca wants to see if you can wear them." With that, Lupe ran up the stairs with Micki toddling after her. "That ought to keep them busy for a while," Cat said, with a motherly smile. "Let's go see what nonsense the Perfesser is up to now." As usual, the two Protectors climbed the stairs to the Perfesser's private rooms. As usual, Diego tagged along like a lovesick pup. But this time he was wearing a sad expression. "Why the long face, sport?" Cat asked him. "Ah, Ms. Cat, you have a lovely daughter, but I had hoped I would have the pleasure of being the father of your first child myself." "Oh, well, you never know kid, you can always be the number two seed-planter," Cat said, with a grin. "I don't think Diego wants to be number two," Gaby said, and added in a lower voice to herself, "not if he knows what's good for him and junk." All three of them entered the top floor living room and found refreshments placed on a modest table in front of a well-padded sofa. The Ole Perfesser was waiting for them by the table. "Ah, Ms. Cat, I am so glad that you could make it here today. Please, sit down on the sofa, help yourself to anything you might want. I know a nursing mother like yourself has to eat and drink a lot to keep up the milk supply, yes?" "So true, Perfesser," Cat said, as she unselfconsciously dug in to the food and drink. "Can't go out hunting for food when you have a little one to protect." "Un huh, yes, I see," the Perfesser said, almost absentmindedly. "Gaby and I need to confer in the next room before I can elaborate on the purpose of this meeting, my dear. Would you mind if Diego entertains you while we're gone? It will only take a few minutes." "Take your time, Perfesser," Cat said, through her mouth stuffed with food. "I'm sure Diego will make fine company." Gaby and the Perfesser went through a side door to the Perfesser's inner sanctum. The room was dark and soundproofed, but they spoke in whispers anyhow because of Cat's inhumanly sharp hearing. "I know you have only been reading auras for a short time, Gaby, but I'm surprised you didn't catch it." "Catch what, Perfesser? What have I missed?' "The reason for the odd behavior in Cat that you have been telling me about. Cat is the result of a delicate mixture of the woman Katherine Filin and the demon Malato-Zu. Normally it is a 50/50 balance of demon and human, resulting in The Cat, a completely different third personality. She has the demon's fierceness and savagery, but Katherine's humanity and sense of humor. However, on certain occasions the demon overpowers the human side and becomes the completely dominant personality. From what you have told me, this used to happen during the full moon, but now seems to occur at random. And when it does happen, the demon aura that always surrounds Cat becomes much stronger, as it is right now." "What? But Cat, she doesn't look any different." "True, but I see a definite increase in the aura from the normal state of things. It's a subtle increase, perhaps no more than 10%, not enough to bring on the physical presence of the demon, but enough that the demon is more in control mentally than it would usually be." "Then that would explain a lot, why she's acting odd now and even before, when we were all in the Philippines. The aura of Malato-Zu was very strong then, even when the demon wasn't around. Mick, the Mouse, told me on the return that Malato told him Cat was in heat, just like a real lioness, and that she wanted to mate with him. He said Malato-Zu had never communicated with him before." "And apparently when they did mate after they got back home, she did something to him that transformed him into a baby, and a female baby at that. Haw, I never guessed that the Mouse was a man. He's pretty good." "But the question now, Perfesser, is how did she do it and can anything be done to restore the Mouse to what he used to be?" "Well, obviously, it had something to do with the sex act. Look what happened to those goons who gang-raped Cat last Fall. I got in touch with that doctor you read about in the Times, Dr. Mahindra. He confirmed that all the men who had sex with Cat underwent some sort of feminization. But none of them completely changed gender and none of them were turned into babies." "We need to find out what was different in Mick's case." "That's what we're here to do today, Gaby, and I fear it won't be easy getting the answer." They re-entered the living room to find Diego sitting on the sofa by himself. "Don't look at me, I didn't run her off," he said. "We were having a nice conversation when she hefted her breasts, said it was time to feed Micki again and left. She said she'd be back as soon as she was finished." "Just as well," the Perfesser said. "We need to make some preparations before she returns. You've told me you're suddenly ready to explore your magical heritage, Diego. Well, now would be a good time to start." Cat found Micki, Lupe and Lupe's aunt in an apartment on the second floor. They had gone through about half the clothes stored in plastic bags and found several items that fit Micki. The floor was littered with the tattered remains of the outfits Micki didn't like, but she had allowed a few to survive without destruction. "Sorry about the ones she tore to bits," Cat said, as she grabbed Micki and positioned herself for the feeding. "Some of them look like they were kind of cute. She is getting so finicky now." The morning's activities had left Micki thirsty and hungry and she didn't object to Cat's generous nipple being shoved into her mouth this time. She sucked and squeezed for all she was worth and actually made a good effort at emptying the giant gland of all its milk. "Did I ever get fed like that when I was a baby, Auntie Al?" Lupe asked her aunt. "Er, no, child," Alabreca said, with a lowered head. "Your mother never produced much milk. Your grandfather said it was probably due to her...problem." "Yeah, the same problem that's keeping her away from us today," Lupe said bitterly. Micki soon finished suckling and had a very full tummy. Alabreca could see she had eaten too much and volunteered to burp her. She placed the toddler on her shoulder and patted her gently on the back. Lupe wanted to take some part in the proceedings and laughed and held Micki's hand. Micki made a gurgling noise, hiccupped, then threw up right in Lupe's face. Lupe was caught with her mouth open and swallowed a mouthful of the liquid in surprised reaction. "Ew, gross," her aunt said teasingly. "Oh, it's not so bad. It's not sour or smelly at all. In fact, it tasted kind of good, kind of like honey and cream." Alabreca took both Micki and Lupe to the bathroom. She had them undress while she ran a tub of warm water. Then she had them bathe together to clean up, while she soaked the stains out of their clothes. This was the first time anyone outside the family had seen Lupe's duel genitals since the pajama party disaster, but she was just as curious about Micki's little tail as Micki was about her special feature so there was a bit of innocent examination on both sides. When Alabreca returned to make sure they were using the soap, they were laughing and splashing each other like old friends. She was happy that Lupe had a friend now, because she'd had almost none in her young life. "Ah, what are we gonna do with you, Guadelupe, eh?" she asked, as she washed her niece's hair. "You are almost 11 years old and you got no tits. When I was your age, I was already wearing an adult bra.. You don't even need a training bra for those little buds." "AUNTIE AL, that's embarrassing!" Lupe said, as she put her hands to her ears and shook her head. "Oh, Micki doesn't care," Alabreca said, as she gently pinched the toddler's nose. "I'll bet she gets some big ones when she's a little older. Look at those watermelons her mother carries around." Micki gave Alabreca a curious look and raised her eyebrow, but the woman ignored it. Auntie Al soon had the children dried off and put them in some nightgowns for a little nap. In less than a minute they were both in dreamland, holding each other's hands. Meanwhile, Cat had returned to the Perfessor's apartment to find some changes had been made. The furniture had all been moved to the side and there was a symbol chalked on the floor. "Well, what's all this then?" she asked. "That is a pentagram, as I am sure you already know. We would like to ask Malato-Zu a few questions and I think this will help us get some answers." Cat stayed near the entrance to the room. "That could be a dangerous thing to do, little man. Malato-Zu is not known to suffer fools easily, especially male fools." The Perfesser produced a small item and handed it to Diego. It was what looked like a rag doll made to resemble the idol of Malato-Zu. Attached to it was a piece of Cat's costume that had come off when she almost transformed to her demon form here before. "Please come in and lay down in the pentagram, Ms. Cat," Diego said, his voice strangely soothing. "I promise you nothing will be done to harm you or your child. We just want to help." Cat wavered for a moment and then walked to the chalked symbol and laid down in the middle of it. "You once asked my grandson what he could do and he didn't know. We have since learned that he has the gift of persuasion. He has always had a way with the ladies and could talk himself out of any bad situation, but it apparently goes much deeper than that. Normally, you could still resist his power, but the voodoo doll makes all the difference." Then the Perfesser, Diego and Gaby sat in a triangle around Cat, each making sure not to touch the pentagram. The Perfessor started an ancient Native American chant, while Gaby beat on a 200 year-old drum and Diego held tight to the voodoo doll. After several minutes of chanting, the Perfesser picked up an old peace pipe and lit it with a wooden match. He took a healthy pull on it, blew the smoke in Cat's direction and passed it to his grandson. The pipe passed among them several times and each of them blew smoke in Cat's direction. The room seemed to grow darker and darker, until there was a sudden flash of light. All four people in the room were transported to another place and time, a place of clouds and fire and endless stars. Gaby and Diego remained silent, but the Perfesser addressed Cat's stiff form. "Come out demon, come out Malato-Zu. We wish to have some words with you." There was a slight trembling, as if from a minor earthquake, and a sickly green smoke rose from Cat's body. The eyes were the first thing the Perfesser saw, yellow and glowing with hate, then the teeth, huge, sharp, yellow and menacing. The body formed quickly after that. It was massive and feral. It somewhat resembled the demon Cat, but was in no way human at all. "You are bold, mortal, more bold than I'd given you credit for, considering the limits of your puny power. Know that these weak spells of yours cannot hold me for long, so if you have any questions, you had best ask them now." "Why have you transformed Mickey Montana into a child?" "I am the symbol of fertility as well as death, human. I take as much pleasure in bringing life into the world as taking it away. These breasts were meant to suckle a multitude of my children, but that all ended when Jah imprisoned me in that hateful idol. The angels came to earth to have the daughters of men. I alone, of all the thousands who rebelled, came to earth to have the sons of men. And many of them I had. I had mastery over them and they gave me their seed. I bore many children and they would have eventually ruled the world. But the day came when Jah took notice and caused the cataclysm that killed all my children and forced me to abandon flesh. We had all rebelled to enjoy the pleasures of the flesh, so Jah took away those pleasures. None of us may now bring forth offspring of our own." The Perfesser wondered if that was a tone of regret in the demon's voice. "I no longer had a womb to produce my own children, but I found another way with the help of the Great Deceiver. I gather souls for him and when I have gathered enough, I may use a human that I have lain with to produce a child in my own image. When first I laid eyes on Mickey Montana I thought he was a woman. When I discovered he was a man I knew him to be perfect for my purposes. He, now she, shall be the one to carry out my will on earth and there is nothing you can do to stop it." "So that's what this 'gathering of souls' was all about. Does Katherine know what she has done to Mick?" "Katherine Filin does as I tell her. She is weak and easy to control." "I don't believe that. I think she has more control over the situation than you want us to know." "Believe what you wish, but your spells are beginning to fade. Send me away now, or face my wrath." "I promise you, Malato-Zu, one of these days we will be strong enough to send you away for good," the Perfesser said. "Then that is also the day you will see Katherine Filin no more." Although troubled by that last statement, the Perfesser began another chant, this one of reversal and the room quickly returned to normal. The three mystics looked at each other and compared notes. "Well, like, that was pretty interesting and junk, but it didn't tell me much more than we already knew." "Oh, it told me a great deal, Gaby. It confirmed much of the speculation I had about what happened to Mickey. And I think the demon was lying when she said there was nothing we could do. She was afraid we were going to find something out, that's why she was in such a hurry to end the session." "You mean to tell me Cat's daughter is really the Mouse? And the Mouse is really a man? Why the heck didn't you tell me before?" "Diego, my boy, would you have believed any of that if I'd have told you before now?" "Ah, er, well...no, I wouldn't have. I'd have thought you'd just gotten some bad weed." "Just so, child, just so." "But what was that about being the only female among all the rebellious angels? I thought all angels were basically female." "A popular notion, Diego, but a false one," the Perfesser said. "Angels are spirit creatures, they are neither male nor female. If you ever saw that movie "Dogma" where the angel pulls down his pants and it's just a blank space down there - that's the way angels really are. The angels who rebelled before the flood weren't deemed evil so much because they took on flesh, angels did that all the time in the days of the Old Testament. The real trespass was that they gave themselves genitals and had sex with women." "Except Malato-Zu, who gave herself female sex organs and screwed men," Diego said, as if a light bulb lit up over his head. "Man, I wish you'd asked her why she did that. You think she was gay?" "It's doubtful. I rather look upon the old girl as the world's first feminist, which is extraordinary once you think about how long ago this all took place and the generally lowly position women had to assume even then." The three mystics placed the sleeping Cat on the sofa, erased the pentagram and put everything in the room back in its place. They let Cat sleep until she awoke of her own accord. Then they bundled up the still-napping Micki and Gaby took them both back to the Montana building. It was early the next day and Gaby had assembled Tony, Nicky, Cat and Micki in Mick's apartment to update them on everything they had learned. It was time for yet another of Micki's endless feedings and she still wore her Hello Kitty pajamas, but she was wide awake and peered over Cat's imposing teat so as not to miss anything. "Before we get started, what was that note from the Arrow all about, Tony?" Cat asked. "The man was positively nice when he handed it to me. He really wanted you to have it." "Aw Jeez," Tony said, as he scratched his head. "The dumbass wants to go on a date! He wants to know my phone number and what I like to eat. I mean, is he shittin' me? Me? On a date? With him?" All in attendance took a moment to glance at the new Tony Bass. Tony was wearing a flowing yellow sundress and some strappy clogs. The dress had billowing sleeves and was modestly cut in front to show a hint of his budding d?colletage. He'd learned to manicure his fingers and toes during his counseling sessions and both were painted to perfection. His hair had just been permed into a feathery Farrah Faucet style -- a little out of date, but it seemed to fit him -- while his lips were colored bright red. So far, so good, but then they had to go to the face. Ah, the face. Its most prominent feature was the broken nose, obtained by starting one too many drunken brawls. Tony also had a broad forehead and slightly slanted brows, while his smoothly shaved chin was broad and cleft. In point of fact, Tony looked like Kirk Douglas in drag and talked like a cast member of "The Sopranos." "You got a nice body, Tony, but your face would sink a ship," Nicky said, as he manfully strained to suppress a guffaw. "Just your luck you were wearing a hood when the redneck spotted you. You probably reminded him of his mammy attending a KKK meeting." At that, everyone in the room DID break into gales of laughter. Tony put his hands on his hips and stomped his foot. "Yeah, yeah, ha, ha, ha," he said. "Look here, ya bastards, I don' give a fuck what my face looks like. I ain't got no intentions of going on a date wit' dat Arrow creep or any other man. Current appearances to da contrary, I'm still a man myself, ya bums." Tony tucked his dress under and sat with his hands daintily on his knees. "OK, now that that's out of the way can we please get to the reason we're here and junk?" Gaby said. "Malato-Zu told us yesterday that she did this to Mick because she couldn't reproduce any other way. The only way she can have offspring is to "lay" with men and transform them into copies of herself. Now we know that having sex with Cat has an extremely feminizing effect on men. Look what's happened to Tony here and all those hobos who gang-raped Cat last Fall." "Yes, but neither Tony, nor any of those other men were completely turned into females, like Mick," Nicky said. "And for damn sure he's the only one who was changed into a baby. What's the difference between when they had sex with Cat and when Mick did?" "Hey, I remember somethin'," Tony said. "Cat acted real nonchalant when we was fucking her, said it didn't bother her at all because she wasn't in season. Didn't one of yous say she was in season when she and Mickey boy went at it?" "Yes, I was in season, in heat," Cat said, as she quietly sat and fed Micki. "I felt like I really had to have sex, but I had no idea it would do this to Mick. You've got to believe me, Malato-Zu hid that from me." "So, having sex with Cat while she's in season will change a man into a female baby," Gaby said. "But it seems there must be something more to it than that. What was that you said to me the other day, Cat, something about nursing Micki for three more weeks. It seemed very important to you." "Hmm, ah, I don't remember saying that. Isn't all this nursing what's making Micki grow so fast? She just eats so much and you can almost see her growing. Don't you think Mick would want to grow up as fast as possible? Who knows? After all this good mother's milk, why she might wind up six feet tall just like me. Wouldn't that be great, Micki?" A loud popping noise was heard as Micki spit out Cat's nipple, spilling milk on Cat's lap and the chair she sat on. Micki jumped off her lap and wiped her face like she had bitten into a sour apple. "Da mik, da mik, dats da answer," she shouted. "What the fuck?" said Tony Bass. "Mick, Mick, you can talk!" said Nicky joyfully. "Yea, I cwan tawk an' I'm still a dam good detwective," Micki said. "Dam dis soft pawit. I swound wike E'mer Fudd!" "More like Tweetie Bird," Gaby said. "Naw, Mike Tyson," Tony offered. "Whatewa. Da onwee utta ting difwent fom when I had sex wif Cat an when Towe did was da mik. She wa woaded wit da stuff an' mad me dwink a gawon a it when we wus fuckin'." The placid smile, which had disappeared after the s?ance, returned to Cat's face. "Young lady!" she said. "How dare you use language like that? And how can mommy's milk be bad for you, Sweetie? It's the only thing keeping you alive and it's the only thing that will help you to grow up big and strong like me." "Mick, don't believe her," the Medium said. "The aura around her has grown very strong. The demon is in control!" Indeed, Cat was glowing and growing and in no time at all the full-demon Cat was standing in the middle of the room. Malato-Zu cast a baleful eye at Tony and Nicky, who were holding each other and cowering behind an overturned chair, while Gaby shivered in her black boots, wondering what might be the heroic thing to do. "Daughter, I did not go through all this, I did not slaughter and devour all those men for you to defy me now." "Yow," Micki thought. "She can speak to me telepathically! Another benefit of being her offspring, I guess." "Now, Daughter, behave yourself and drink your milk or I will feast on Tony Bass and Nicky Greao. That I could easily do, because for such an evil clan, the Gambolis are a very tasty lot. I will eat everything and there will be nothing of them left for you to bury or mourn." The giant lion-thing smacked it's lips and licked its huge teeth in anticipation of the meal, almost hoping the child would be defiant so it could feed on human flesh once more. "Tell you what, 'Mom,' I'll make a deal with you," Micki mentally said, and then scrambled to the kitchen as fast as her little legs would carry her. She found what she wanted under the sink and then ran back to the living room. "Demon, this is liquid drain cleaner. I think you still have enough of Katherine in you to know what this can do if it is swallowed," Micki said, mentally. She popped off the lid and held the bottle close to her lips. "If you don't leave my friends alone and allow Cat to take back control, I'm going to swallow the contents of this bottle and then there will be no more offspring for you." For the first time in all his experience with Malato-Zu, Micki saw a look of uncertainty on the demon's face. "That won't work," she said. "You have inherited my invulnerability to harm." "Have I?" Micki asked. "I don't have a demon in me like Katherine does. I'm betting that, while I may be able to recover from some injuries, I won't come back from the massive internal damage ingesting drain cleaner will cause. Want to find out?" "Noooooo." Micki heard a piercing wail in her mind, as Malato-Zu collapsed and shriveled down to a sleeping, naked Cat. Her threat was gone, at least for the present. Micki toddled over to Cat and sat next to her on the floor, gently running her tiny fingers through the cat woman's hair. "Micki, Micki is everything all right," Gaby said. "The demon, what happened?" "Evwee ting is awite fa now. Da demon ist quiat agin." "Oh good God, Mick, that was horrible," Nicky said, as he pulled himself away from the grasp of the still-terrified Tony. "How can you stand to be around that awful woman? You need to get away from her now. We all need to get away from her, before she kills us all!" "Yeth, it ith howwable, but I'm not abawndaming Cat," Micki said, as she continued to stroke Cat's face. "You cawn weev if you wan, not me." Nicky was stymied. He hated Cat for what she had done to his family and his friend. But he still loved Mick, even if he was female now, and he didn't want to give that up. So he simply started helping put the room back together and kept his mouth shut. It was late afternoon before Cat recovered enough to sit up and shakily put on some clothes. Gaby stayed to make sure, but detected only the normal Cat aura about her. "The demon is still there, as always," she told Micki and the others. "But Cat is in control, at least, as in control as she ever will be.'' Thus assured, Nicky and Tony went to take care of some customers at Nicky's neglected store, while Gaby stayed to lend what further help she could. "Well, you showed that old demon who was boss, squirt," Cat told Micki, as she smiled at her 'daughter.' "Speaking of squirt, what the hell am I going to do with all this breast milk? My tits are sore as hell!" The beast pump did extra duty that day and by the time Cat was finally 'empty' she had given almost a ? gallon of magic milk. "What do we do with the stuff?" "Let's freeze it for now." Gaby said. "Who knows? There may actually be a use found for it sometime in the future." "Oh no, I jwst tot o' somtin'," Micki said as she slapped her little head. "Wupe. She swawoed a moutfuwa dat stuff da oddar day." "I wonder what effect it will have on a hermaphrodite," Gaby said. "Maybe none at all?" "Don't count on it," Cat said. "We'd better keep a close watch on her." At that point, there was a knock on the door. "Get that, will you, Gaby," Cat said. "Right now, you're the most normal-looking of all of us." Gaby muttered something about a back-handed compliment and went to answer the door. When she opened it, there stood a neat-looking little man and woman. The man was sharply dressed and his gray hair was carefully trimmed. The woman was very pretty and though she had some wrinkles on her face, nothing else betrayed the fact that she was in her late 40s. They were both less than five feet tall. "Hello, may I help you?" Gaby said, as she stared down at the two of them. "Yes," the little man said. "We are Mr. and Mrs. Montana. We'd like to see our son, please." Gaby gasped. End of Episode Seven