Classifieds In An Alternate Reality free porn video

Backstory: In an alternate reality very similar to our own, an event colloquially known as "The Change" took place about 5 years ago. This Change caused random alterations in the human population, causing panic, riots, and widespread mayhem. Over time though, humanity did what humanity has always done after chaos: it fought its way back to order. People adapted to their circumstances. Society moved on, and people got back to the business of being alive and living their lives. But, needless to say things will always be different than they were before. Listed below are personal ads from a well-known classifieds website. Like the ads in our world, these ads are filled with a wide variety of people looking for a wide variety of things. Their world just has more variety. ---------- Petite Ladies Have More Fun! I'll try to keep this short, like me. I'm 23, 5'1, I have a thin build, swf. I love the outdoors, fishing, cooking, travel, etc. I LOVE to laugh! There's a lot that I would like to say but I guess the most important is that I'm tired of waking up alone. I have a full life but something is missing, or should I say someone. I'm ready to find that someone to enjoy life with. I may not find him here, but it's worth a try. I lost my breasts in the change, so I guess I should mention that up front in case that's a deal breaker for you. Sorry boob men, I'm 100% mammary free. I don't even have nipples! I may be totally flat on top, but I'm still female otherwise. What I'm looking for is someone who enjoys life, not just existing. I would like to meet someone who enjoys the outdoors, traveling, etc. I have a variety of interests and I'm always looking for a new hobby so you shouldn't have a problem trying new things. It is also very important that you enjoy intimacy (and once or twice a week is NOT intimate enough). That being said, I prefer men with regular penises, but if you have something else, let me know up front and I will let you know if it will "work out". If you're interested in finding out more about me, please respond with your favorite sports team and a pic. ---------- Married Man looking for Spice They used to have separate categories on here for stuff like this, but now that everything is combined and "non gender specific" I have no clever way of saying this without just saying it. I am a 31 year old married white male looking to add some spice back into my life. By that I mean I want a new sexual partner. I am not looking to change my situation or yours but I just need more than what I have with my spouse right now. My wife and I haven't been able to be intimate since the change due to complications related to her transformation. (No she didn't just grow a penis, I could handle that.) It's more "complicated" than I'd like to discuss on here. I still love her, but I need to be with a woman again. My wife is aware I'm actively seeking and is ok with it. I am 6 ft, brown hair, blue eyes and keep myself in shape. I got pretty lucky during the change, the only thing that happened was my voice changed. I sound like a little girl now, but, I am still very much a man in all other regards. But to warn you, our first phone conversation might be a little weird. I'm not just looking for sex. I would love to play a sexy round of golf together or have a mutual massage session or maybe just some simple role play. I just need excitement and adventure again, I feel like I've been cooped up in my house for the last few years. If you are 24-45, well groomed, ddf, reasonably attractive and still have mostly human parts, I would love to hear from you! Your pic gets mine. Put "spice it up" in the subject bar. I am flexible during the day as well. Can't wait to hear from you! P.S. If you wear/have glasses, you are at the top of my list :) ---------- Fun Woman Seeking Drama Free Man I certainly can't speak for anyone else but I've surprisingly had pretty good luck in terms of "potentials" on here the 2 times I've posted before. After weeding out the weirdos, liars and perverts, I've met 2 NICE guys on here. 1 guy was great online but when we met in person I just didn't feel that chemistry needed for more than friendship, and the 2nd guy just wasn't ready for being with a woman like me at the time. Beauty is in the eye of the beholder but I consider myself at least attractive and have no issues attracting male attention. I'm a black woman in my early 30s, college educated, professional, non-smoker, no D/D. I'm not a fitness nut but I take care of myself and I'm HWP. I must mention that, yes, I was affected by the change, and yes I do have male equipment now. If you respond to this ad I'm trusting that you are ok with that. I'm still feminine in appearance and consider myself a woman although I can "be a man" when the mood strikes me ;) I prefer YOU to be 25-35. Non-smoker/drugs/disease, no heavy drinkers, hwp (not into heavy guys or guts) and while the majority of my relationships since the change have been with white men with female parts, I've dated many races/gender combinations and I'm open to most of them. I like extroverted men and I'm also partial to taller men (over 6 ft+), honest. (I'm not looking to "surprise" anyone with my changes, so please don't try to surprise me. Let me know your situation up front.) ME-I'm a good person, traditional mindset (I believe that a good man leads), independent, open minded, no drama and no kids still at home. Please no guys only interested in one night stands or just sex. Relax... I'm not looking for a husband or a baby daddy--I'm looking for one male to have an ongoing "something" with (I hate the term fwb) who wants the same. I understand discretion but NO PIC NO RESPONSE-I will not stalk you or "out" you. I will just delete if not interested. No need to waste my time or yours. ---------- Sane Man Seeking Woman for Companionship...Maybe More? So, I am a normal, sane, professional white male. I have a full time job, went to college, have no criminal record, and most importantly, I am not crazy! I am looking for, well, a girl to become friends with. I would like our friendship to ultimately include some forms of intimacy, which we can discover what we each want, as we can go. For now though, I'd love to just snuggle up and watch a good movie. But first and foremost, I am simply looking for a nice girl that I could meet for a drink, or have a late bite to eat or something. Once both of us are comfortable enough to say the other isn't crazy, maybe we could come back to my place and watch that movie and snuggle. I am tired of being alone. I have a nice place, comfortable couch, very comfortable bed, and it just sucks enjoying it all alone. I just want someone to spend time with! I am a very nice guy, others would describe me as very easy to get along with, sarcastic, funny, and definitely nice. I will treat you nicer than any other man ever has, that much I can promise. So, a little about me (so you can get a feel if we are compatible). I am originally from NC, I guess you could describe me a somewhat of a "hippie". I pretty much like all kinds of music, anchored by my love of classic rock, some pop, country, hip hop etc.... I am a night owl....I work a late shift for work, so I am usually getting off around 12am during the week, and will usually stay up until 3 or 4. I love to cuddle, spoon, touch, experience, and enjoy, every second I am with a woman. During the change I lost my male parts but then I ended up with two full sets of female parts. (Seriously, it's crowded down there!) Of course, having two reproductive organs means I also have twice the sex drive of a normal woman, even though I'm still very much a heterosexual male. Does that make sense? Anyway, I masturbate at least twice a day....I have a foot fetish, a breast fetish, love sexy butts, and can't get enough of smooth, sexy legs and.....I guess I still like everything about "classic women", which is kind of ironic given my situation. Technically, I guess I'm a lesbian. But, seriously, the closer you look to Marylyn Monroe, the better. Now, that doesn't mean I'm one of those weirdos that just gets off on pre-change porno all day, I'm open minded and I'm willing to try new things. But, I am still looking for a woman, so, dudes and mostly dudes need not apply. If you USED to be a dude but identify and pass as a woman now, that's ok. I am a little bit OCD, I like things being in place, and keep my home clean (you will probably think it's very clean) lol Anyway, I don't know, I thought I would give this a shot. If there is anyone else out there that is lonely, that might like to give a very nice guy a shot, please reply! ---------- SWF Seeking Younger Woman This is my first time doing something like this but there is a first for everything. I am a 6ft, 180 lb. white female in my early twenties looking for a woman to spend my time with. I didn't identify as lesbian before the change, but I guess I do now. However, that's taken me a while to figure out so I have only been with one woman before. I may need to be taught a few things but I am a fast learner and very perceptive. I am mostly looking for someone to relax with after work each day and find some fun things to do during the weekend. I want to try/experience new things. I am tired of the same old daily routine my life seems to be now. I am a very affectionate person so I like to cuddle and hold hands as lame as that sounds. For the most part I just want someone who I can be goofy with as well. I am very open when it comes to race/ethnicity, I just ask you be fully female. No men, threesomes, or women with husbands/boyfriends. I don't like to hide anything or be secretive, so please be open and honest about your "situation" because, honestly, I'll just find out about it eventually so why lie? I'm very open, laid back, and easy to get along with. Drama free and take care of myself. Looking for the same. I will not reply to any responses that do not include a picture. Yours gets mine. Even if you are not the one, I am open to finding a very good friend. ---------- Family man wanted I am a 22 year old white woman (female) looking for a family man, a man that loves children. I would love to find me a true old fashioned man but they are hard to come by now a days... So, a little about me: I have four little ones all under 10. The change made me hyper fertile, I got pregnant three times in two years even using multiple forms of birth control. I didn't know it at the time of course, but I am capable of getting pregnant just from being near other people. The other person does not even have to be male, I simply absorb other people's DNA through my skin and get pregnant that way. I became pregnant with my fourth when I was in between relationships and hadn't slept with anyone in over two months. I have a feeling the "father" is one of the women in my office. Anyway, I had my ovaries removed, but of course they grew back in like a week. I now have to take special medication to keep me from constantly getting pregnant. I'm not really looking to have another child but if I met the right man who really wanted to, I would consider it. Although, if I stop taking the pills there's no guarantee I'd get pregnant from any specific person...just fyi. Anyhoo, I like to fish, go camping, go hiking and I love to garden. I would love to learn how to hunt. I am a southern woman and have southern values. I am looking for true love not some one night stand. Please be clean have a job, your own place, car and no drama and NO DRUGS. I want a grown man who wants to come home to a clean home and a hot cooked meal on the table. If any of this sounds like something you are interested in let me know a little about you in the email you send your picture gets mine. Please no dirty pictures. Oh yeah, I am looking for a long term relationship something that could lead to marriage. I love country music, rock and some other stuff. I don't smoke but I am cool with it if you do, drinking is fine but not if you're an alcoholic. I want a decent man for me and my children. I like a man who wants to, has a high sex drive and is a one woman man. You must be honest, clean, not a momma's boy. Have your stuff together, I don't need another child to raise. ---------- Keeping the Faith? I know it's a long shot to come across a man who is still keeping the faith genuinely after the change, but here goes... Hi there! I'm a beautiful, independent, ambitious, fun Christian African American woman looking for mature, serious authentic relationships. I'm 24, slim, and I'm told I have a beautiful smile. If you're serious about friendships and relationships, feel free to email away for some good conversation! I absolutely love traveling, nature, writing, and cooking. Now, before we go further I should mention the good lord saw fit to give me more breasts during the change, so I have 8 breasts now. Since my breasts completely fill my front torso, I can't pretend it isn't something people notice right away when they see me. So I figured I'd better put that out there. I don't mind sending pictures, but please, only ask if you are serious, I am so tired of "collectors". If you send me pics, please make sure they are decent and in order. We can ask more questions via our conversations. Talk to you soon! ---------- Any REAL Women out there? Hello, had this ad for over three weeks now. Ran it in the casual encounter section, wrong place? Who knows? For one, my ad had pictures, 4 to be exact, and people still said "send pics" WTF. Not a single real person has answered it that was serious. 99% want to redirect me to a stupid Gmail account, ain't doing it scammers! Never thought I'd be doing this on here, but here goes. I am a local firefighter, recently divorced after 4 years separation. After all this time trying to make things work with my ex, I'm tired of sitting around at home alone. It's time to dust off my boots and start being a man again. I own my own home, truck, Harley and am full-time employed as a firefighter. So...might as well get it out there that during the change my "manhood" grew substantially. Not quite third leg, but definitely third arm territory. Now, while most guys would think that's a blessing, it's a curse. It gets in the way all the time, especially during my work. I also won't fit inside a woman anymore unless she also had some sort of major enlargement down there during the change or is like 15 feet tall. I miss sex, yes, but even more than that I miss the holding and love of a woman, smelling her hair and rubbing her neck and back. Cuddling in bed is the best cure for insomnia there ever was. I love to treat a woman like a queen in the bedroom, even if old fashioned intercourse is off the table. I do have a few tattoos nothing major or gross. I'm clean cut and have been with only one woman in 20 years, and haven't had sex in the last 5. I am looking for just maybe a casual meet up or texting/talking at first to get to know you and if we're a match. NO continuous BS over email! I am in great physical shape and you should be too. I like a woman younger than me, preferably 25-30 years old. Genitals don't matter since we probably won't be having actual sex anyway, just have the general appearance of a woman. Petite is a huge plus but definitely not necessary, as long as you are somewhat fit. Sorry but not looking for any "BBW's but I'm sexy as hell". If you're interested hit me up. Email me some pics that aren't from before the change, and I'll send some back. We can see where this may go. If you meet the requirements above, please respond, if you're not sure, but are genuine and sincere, then please respond. If you are looking for dick pics, get bent. I'm looking for a real woman, for casual fun at first, what's casual? We'll cross that bridge when we get there. Hit me up! ---------- I've Got Legs, And I Know How to Use Em! I'm a 24 year old woman just looking for someone I get along with and have things in common with. I'm white, athletic build, average size bust, still all woman down below. I'm a tripod, so, if you're a leg man I have 3 long ones :) Not looking for something too serious, but don't want someone who sleeps around. I'm a pretty girl and looking for a good looking man. I work out regularly. Please send a picture, if I'm interested I'll respond :) ---------- I'm Just Looking For.... Friendship Romance Passion Intelligence Humor Honesty and Love I'm a tall, 32 year old, plus sized (and working VERY hard to remedy that) woman looking for a great guy to spend my time with. I am looking for someone to appreciate the woman I am. Full disclosure: I am part viper and I am highly venomous, but I keep my fangs coated/capped and I don't bite involuntarily. We probably shouldn't ever kiss to be on the safe side. I'm looking for someone to pal around with mostly, going on some dates and whatnot, but hopefully moving beyond that. I'm thinking: hitting up fun restaurants, seeing a movie, thrifting, catching concerts, wandering a museum, staying in and cooking a meal, etc. I dig guys who are a bit taller (I'm 6'1"), but you don't have to be a giant. I am open minded to most types of people but if you have hooves, I can't handle that, sorry. My last boyfriend had hooves and it just weirds me out. I'm creatively-inclined, and have a good sense of humor. Appreciating stuff like old movies, music, cooking, and dogs couldn't possibly hurt your case though. If this jives with you, by all means, hit me up. And make it cute :-) The icing on the cake will be the mind-blowing chemistry, because ultimately, that's what I'm in the market for. Throw in the mandatory sense of humor, and we'll really be cooking with gas. Please no thugs, married men, or people looking for one night stands or friends with benefits. Also, pictures of you shirtless in front of your "car" do nothing for me. Dick pics do even less for me. And I should throw it out there that I do prefer Caucasian men with all of their teeth between the ages of 26-39. Please send a picture and I will send one back. Let me just say this... I am too old for games and you DON'T want to piss me off. I hate hit em and leave em type guys. I'm not into 1 night stands. If you are not looking for a future with someone, don't try to get with me. I AM NOT 420 FRIENDLY!! No drugs ... I LOOK FORWARD TO HEARING FROM YOU! ---------- Just a Simple Fella Looking For Love I am a tall laid back 29 year old fella who is a simple man. I am a fan of racing, football, helping people, giving free labor to family and good friends, working, cash, chicken wings, learning about women, watching the big screen, eating out, spoiling people who are really close to me, even ones that are currently taken. Not in that order. I got a set of female breasts during the change, had them removed...twice, but, you know how that goes. I'm currently sporting full DDs, but I'm doing exercises to try to minimize them. I am NOT into having them fondled, sucked, or whatever so if you are into that stuff keep looking. I don't smoke. I get sick around it therefore it would be an automatic deal breaker. I've been around women long enough I know what I want and I know what it consists of. Call me arrogant, whatever you need to. I am usually attracted to any height. A few curves are my specialty. I am a brunette fan generally but not opposed to other. Not a lot of makeup is a plus. I'd prefer a woman who has bigger boobs than I do, but, it's not a deal breaker. I do random things. It's all about the details. I am a bit of a country man, so you should be sort of. I like traveling I just hadn't gotten a chance to recently. I have everything I want in life but a woman I can spend the rest of it with. I can guarantee you I am not perfect. But I would like to find someone perfect for me. And vice versa. On the other hand I cannot wait till fall full of hot chocolate, sweatshirts, cuddling, cookin in the oven. My favorite time of the year! Thanks for reading. I hope it was worth your time. If you feel the urge to reply please do so! Regards, Me ---------- SHF Seeking Long Term Romance I'm a 30 year old divorced, mixed Hispanic woman. I am on a search for husband. I want that man that makes me weak at the knees when we kiss....that man that gives me flowers just because....that man that says I love you and means it for life...that man that walks beside me, not in front of or behind me...I'm looking for my prince in life that I have yet to find, but I know you're out there that's why I keep looking. I want someone who loves to laugh, who likes watching movies, trips to mountains and the beach, who likes children. I am hoping to have children within the next couple years. FYI, I'm still fully female, it's just that my "parts" aren't where they used to be. I should still be able to have children, it will just be extra challenging now given the new location of things. More on that if we go somewhere. Send me your pic if you're interested. Age 30 and over please. ---------- Are you my future Mrs? I am a single, never married man in search of a woman willing to hopefully, be my wife. Yes, I am a man NOT afraid of commitment and am, in fact, looking for someone that is mature enough for marriage. If you have never been in a loving, healthy, and long-ish relationship before, then you are probably not the one for me. You must be willing to relocate, be clean, DDF (cigarettes included), respectful, trustworthy, faithful, and mature. I like them pretty in the face and thin in the waist. I work in IT, I own my own home, and I'm currently pregnant. The story of how I became pregnant is a long one, but it goes without saying I became functionally female during the change. My future wife must be willing to accept me AND my baby as we are. I am very decisive, I love sports, seafood, fitness, horror movies, and music. I am really down to earth but old school, and I am the kind of man that would adore you if you gave me your heart. Please respond with a little bit about yourself and attach a recent photo as well. Race isn't important to me at all, but quality is. Since I have female parts, I would prefer a woman with male equipment, or at least some sort of penis. But I am open to anyone passing as a woman. (NO PHOTO, NOT INTERESTED) ---------- Ready For More Hello, just a young guy (20) here looking for his first "actual" relationship. I am an intelligent, fun loving and down to earth guy with real aspirations in life. I always keep my mind and body healthy (even though I can cook some pretty delicious unhealthy food). I have a good job and I go to college currently to get my degree this semester. I consider myself to be a pretty good conversationalist and an even better listener even though I can be a little withdrawn sometimes. However, I do have trouble getting to know girls/women my age on a more personal level and I've always been very nervous when it comes to actually asking girls out on dates and I shy away quite often. Mind you, I have been on some dates before so I guess you could say that I'm not completely without experience, but it's still hard for me to get close and intimate with someone. The changes left me looking awfully feminine, so it makes me really self-conscious and sometimes awkward around women. But I'm just getting tired of being single and having no one else. I may look like a woman, but I am a man at heart and where it "counts". I am hoping to find a woman who I can be a man around and not be treated like one of her girlfriends. If you are a nice girl that wants to be taken care of and can handle being with a man like me, I'd love to hear from you. Please respond with a pic and some sentences about yourself if you do reply. I just need to know that you're real and not a man (since, let's be honest, the man-to-woman ratio is a bit unbalanced here). I will send a picture back. As long as you are somewhat near my age (18-27? idk), we're good. I'm not going to go in with any expectations if you do respond so please don't hesitate to reply if you are single and this ad interests you. Whatever happens, happens. There is no pressure, but I would love to speak with you if you are interested! Oh, I'm 5'10, white, 150lbs, C cup, and slim build if you want some kind of visualization. ---------- Mythical Woman Seeks Real Man I'm looking for something real. I've tried dating sites set up specifically for people "like me" but I have not had luck finding a man. Half the guys I meet want to bed me as some sort of weird conquest, the other half run away in revulsion. But, I don't want just sex just because we are physically able to have sex. I want a man who is actually serious about wanting a relationship. You can get past physical stuff if you have true love, but you can't form true love just from physical stuff. I refuse to be defined by my physical form. I am a person regardless of what some stupid cosmic change event did to me. So if you're interested about getting to know someone and possibly it developing into a real relationship then send me a message. About me: I'm a centaur, female (both halves) and caucasian. 6'9"; 1,980 lbs. I have brown hair, brown fur, hazel eyes. I am loyal, hardworking, and very outspoken. I'm not good at talking about myself so that's all I got for now. Serious inquiries ONLY please. ---------- Into Blues? I'm looking for a normal-ish looking guy, single, or divorced in his thirties or forties who is looking for a good looking blue skinned woman who knows how to treat a man. Tired of the bullshit and games and/or being treated like a charity case or a freak because of the color of my skin. To answer your question up front, NO, the rumors about blue women are NOT true! There was only that one isolated case in Oregon, so stop the prejudice! Also, if you are controlling, abusive in anyway, do not answer this ad. Looking for a social drinker, no drug addicts. Must have a car, job, place to live as do I. Tired of wasting time, want to find someone I bond with and can have a normal life. I'm a lot of fun, like to try new things. Want someone to make me laugh and smile and please me and I want to do the same for him. MUST LIVE IN LOCAL AREA. If you're an outdoors guy, fish, camp, hangout with your buddies etc. you're not for me. I would like to find someone who I can connect with, have awesome conversations, take walks, someone into lifting weights is a plus. I like to watch movies, chill, go to festivals, anything fun. I love to kiss and cuddle and would like to find someone as giving in the bedroom as receiving. I'm one of the few good hearted women left, don't take kindness for weakness. Just ultimately looking for the right person, if that exists. I hate drama and fighting. Please send a couple pictures, no nudes please. I won't send any nudes, so don't ask. (You want to see what it looks like, well, be a decent man for me.) Don't respond if you don't have RECENT pics of yourself. NO PRE-CHANGE PICS! Are there any good men out there looking for a good woman? If so, email me. ---------- Looking for Netflix..possibly and chill? I don't know... First of all... Polythelia... I guess I'm just looking for a really really good friend. Gender, race, etc not important. Someone to lay on the couch and watch movies with, someone to go out to dinner once and a while, play pool, hang out with friends... No pressure. I guess very close best friends and see where it goes. I am being vague on purpose for anonymity sake, I have a kind of distinctive look. I'll gladly tell you more via email. Talk to ya soon! ---------- SW"M" Seeking Open Minded Person for Friendship or More I'm professional single white male, in my 30s, outgoing, funny. I own my own business. I enjoy animals, festivals, live music, sports, movies, concerts, walking on the beach, NFL, UFC, your typical man stuff. Physically, I have the body of a woman now thanks to "the change". (UGH!!) I'm 5'8 with long blonde hair and blue eyes. Much to my embarrassment, I have to say most people tell me I look like a blonde Emma Stone now, but I only barely see it. What am I looking for? I'm looking for anyone passing as female between 21 and 35 that is open to a relationship. "She" should be open minded. Someone I can get to know. Someone who's funny, outgoing, enjoys similar things, can handle sarcasm, and is looking to meet someone and take it from there. Please be single, average to athletic build HWP, 5'8 or shorter. Women with penises move to the front of the line! If you'd like to chat, please send me a message with a picture and your favorite sports team in the subject line to weed out all the Nigerian princes and the spam. Thanks and I look forward to hearing from you. ---------- Women ONLY Please! I am not 100% sure what I am looking for, but I will know it when I find it. I am sure that I don't want a one night stand or some encounter with a "Woman" that "will be our little secret". I guess I would like to find something casual and ongoing much like a fwb but not solely a fwb I guess I'd like the chance or option that if things click that possibly something more long term could come of it. I am a professional black male 5'8" 160 lbs, athletic build. I got pretty lucky during the change, mostly internal stuff, only a couple minor exterior changes. I do have a bovine digestive system, so I have a very specific diet now. No steak dinners for me! If you are looking for a normal guy like me, I look forward to hearing from you. We can go on from there. Replies without pictures will be ignored. You should also be up front and describe your "situation" before we get started. I don't want to spend a bunch of time getting to know someone and then find out that there is no physical attraction or we are physically incompatible. I will happily send you my picture and description of my situation in return. ---------- Master Seeks Sub Male Human Dom looking for a submissive hybrid female... for 50 shades of grey type relationship. I'm looking for a woman, an animal/human hybrid woman, to be my "pet". The specific animal hybrid you are doesn't matter, but livestock type animals will get preference. You should be familiar with a D/s relationship and know your limits. Again only serious subs apply for my time. No endless emails, NO BS no drama, respectful only need apply. Now get on your knees and type Master a nice letter of introduction, your likes dislikes needs wants and experiences. I'm waiting. ---------- Seeking a Friend, Nothing More Separated white woman, just seeking a friend to chat with, maybe share a walk or coffee. I'm into Harleys. I lost my "parts" during the change so if you are looking for anything sexual, keep looking. I have no sex organs and no sex drive. I am looking for friendship, nothing more. I'm 100% drug free. Easy going. Not looking for drama. Your age, size race, not important. If you are married, that's ok, but I'd want to meet your partner and explain things up front. Just be yourself. Have a great sense of humor and goof around. Drop me an email if you're interested in chatting... ---------- SWM seeking SWF Just trying to find a woman, a real woman, to connect with. I wanna cuddle again. I wanna cook for a woman and massage her back after a rough day or listen to how her day was and take her out to eat and go hiking with her and all the things that come with love. So far I have either had no luck, or been offered BJs by gay men. I am sick of the sausage fest lol. I am here to find a best friend who is also a romantic partner. Someone I can fall in love with and grow with. Race is not an issue. I would like to meet someone in person rather sooner than later. And please send a full body (no not nude) picture of yourself...no offense but a lot of women hide their true anatomies with angled pictures. I can handle if you have a slight animalistic appearance, but if you're a hippopotamus with a woman's head or something I couldn't get past that, sorry. I want an attractive mostly human FEMALE. No dicks, no exceptions. You don't have to be super skinny, but I'd really prefer if you took care of yourself. I prefer stronger, fit women. I figure if we're lucky enough to still have human bodies, we should at least take care of them. I'm sorry if I come off like a jerk about all this but, I'm not conceited I just know what I'm attracted to. Don't want to waste anyone's time, especially mine. I hope to hear from you!! ---------- Seeking Special Woman For FWB 32 year old white male looking for a woman for a FWB situation...isn't that why you're here too? Someone to spend time with and not feel the pressure of a committed relationship. Drinks, dancing, music movies. Someone fun to do fun things with. You must be: Sane Single Fit Passionate I picture you in your heels parading in front of me down the hall naked...the shift of your body from one leg to the other being accented by the sound of your heels hitting the hard floor... You take a couple steps into the bedroom before you feel my fingertips tease your skin along the small of your back...you stop...standing still as my fingers move up your back and then quickly back down...sending shivers through your torso...back up to your shoulders and then down your arms. I stop at your wrists and pull them back behind your back. I tell you to "keep your hands behind your back". You reply "yes sir". My hands move down your legs and back up the front of you...the petting gets heavier as you lean back against me...my left hand moves up to your neck and my fingers stretch across your throat...you lean your head back...you give me control... You feel my right hand firmly on the inside of your thigh as it moves up...I can feel the warmth between your legs just before my fingers wrap around your now hard and throbbing cock...you stand there obediently with your hands still behind you...I give my approval and slowly...gently...move over you and envelop your hardness with my wet and waiting pussy. "Close your eyes...keep your hands behind your back" I say as I use your body and give you pleasure as only a man equipped like me can. So...if you are THAT kind of woman looking for THAT kind of man, send me an email and a pic. ;) ---------- Let's Be Serious It's time to put forth a serious effort to have something long-term with. A little about me, I am an articulate and well educated mixed and skinny hermaphrodite (male appearance) in my mid-twenties. No children, no attachments and lots of ambition. It's been quite some time since my last relationship of several years ended and I believe that after time has passed that maybe I should take a serious attempt to see who else may be out there that I can slowly build and start all over with. THIS IS A SERIOUS ATTEMPT MEANING SERIOUS INQUIRIES ONLY. If you're a person of female appearance, age twenty five to forty, and you are honest and disease and drug free, take a shot at replying. I prefer women with human female genitals, but since I have both obviously I am willing and able to experiment. However, if you are looking for a baby daddy, I am telling you up front I'm NOT interested in ever being pregnant. EVER. So, if you just want to hookup and have sex, or want something other than a chance to meet a great guy, then keep it moving. Don't waste my time because I surely don't want to waste yours either. I expect up front honesty because that's exactly what I will give to you. YOU MUST REPLY WITH A PICTURE OF YOURSELF (not anyone else not some inanimate object but YOURSELF) and I will definitely do the same. If you don't reply with a picture I won't even read your message. Reply with a pic and tell me about yourself and I'll be sure to write you back :) ---------- Want a hung woman to fuck your wife/gf?? Hello there! I am a 27 year old married woman looking for a classic heterosexual couple to have some fun with. The changes left me hung like a male porn star and ever since then I've had urges that I can't keep hidden any longer. Now I know what you are thinking..... but it's not like that! My husband has "adapted" to our situation and we still love each other but our sex life is stale, and I have a new sexual appetite that I need to fulfill. Specifically, I want to "take" a married woman while her husband watches. I go online a lot and I am very turned on by the idea of being the "Bull" in a Cuckold type situation. This would work out best if the wife was still mostly a woman and the husband was still mostly a man. Although, the wife won't think of him as a man after she's had me! I have a thick 10" cock, and I have the sexual stamina only a woman can have. Trust me when I say I am more "man" than any man you've had before. I will ruin you, and you'll never be fully satisfied with less again. I would love to degrade/humiliate the husband during all this, but if you are not into that I can be respectful of your wishes. Prefer an ongoing thing, but I'm open as far as when/where this happens. Discretion is a MUST! I'm a respected woman in this town, so no "outing" of anyone involved, please. I am clean, have my own transportation and have my own money. I am 5 foot ten, 135 lbs, very attractive and can provided a pic of what I have to "work with". If you are interested give me a shout, but please provide a pic of you both! Hope to hear from you soon! ---------- Handsome, Tall, & Seeking - m4w Body: Height : 6'2" (187cm) Status : single Age: 30ish Are you looking for a guy who can keep a good conversation and that is pleasing to look at? Do you want someone who will open a door for you and respect what you have to say, yet come up from behind you and pull your hair and start kissing your neck, taking what he wants? Are you looking for great sex with someone that gets better as you learn more about them? If so... keep reading. I am Caucasian, 6' 2", about 180 lbs HWP. I am fairly well endowed as well. I was married for a number of years, but have been divorced for the last 4. I am looking for an ongoing FWB situation. I'm not just looking for a one-time thing though and if more develops out of it, then I'll stay open to possibilities. I think sex is way better when a comfort level is established and both people can be honest about what they are really into. One thing I am into is ass play and I need someone who either enjoys that as well or is open to trying it. I'll tell you more if we talk together. I am looking for someone who takes care of themselves physically and can at least hold a decent conversation. I'd rather have some extra pounds on a woman than have her be magazine skinny, this doesn't mean I like obese though. Not into 420, but don't mind if you use occasionally. No Stoners. I also prefer a non-tobacco user. Alcohol is ok. I especially like dark hair, but hair color isn't a deal breaker by any means. One or two tattoos aren't bad but I'm not attracted to sleeves or someone who is covered in tats. 21-35 years of age would be good, but I can't be too picky because before the change I was a 57 year old married woman. I am fully aware age is relative, sort of like everything else these days, you know? Be STD free, as I am as well. Make sure to respond WITH A PICTURE that is fairly recent and I'll send one back if interested. We'll start with chat or text and if things look good for both of us, we'll go from there. I look forward to hearing from you =) ---------- Are YOU part of my fantasy? I keep having this recurring fantasy play out in my head every time I climax, finding a man who can be a pal, friend, maybe even a lover... then later on, a father (or mother, if that title applies better) to our children. The last bit is a huge MAYBE because I don't think I'm able to have kids (I've fucked several guys in my life [not that many, calm down...], before and after the change and have never had a missed cycle or a [welcomed] surprise a month or two later).... Nevertheless, this fantasy is the real deal for me. I'm at a stage in my life where I feel comfortable with the idea of being a parent. Also, the fantasy of becoming pregnant, the emotions and all the ups and downs that come with pregnancy go past the point of mere intrigue for me. With all of the above in mind, what I'm looking for is a person with a functional, sperm-producing, penis. If you have a functional, sperm-producing, penis, the next step is seeing if the chemistry will be there. We all have some standards, mine aren't as strict or asinine as most peoples. I do need you to take a DNA test if you haven't already so, at the bare minimum, I know you are still fully human. I would also enjoy the thought of having some interests in common, so we at least have some dialogue to break the ice and make the process more comfortable for everyone involved. Last, but certainly not least, I require that you take an STI and HIV test. You must test negative for HIV, STI's can be a hit or miss depending on the diagnosis, but anything curable is fine as long as you get it cured/treated before we engage in penetration of any kind. I know this seems a bit strict, but I am looking out for my health and the potential offspring's health, which should be your priority as well regardless of whether I can conceive naturally or not. Lecture aside, I do not care about your ethnicity, how fat or skinny you are, if you are tatted up or have no tattoos, etc... just as long as you are healthy. By healthy, I mean that you do not smoke, not a constant drinker, and keep a level head around drug use (or better, don't use at all). You also should have the same mindset. If you come at me with a question about my ethnicity or need to see a face pic to see if we'll be a good match, I can assure you we won't be, and that is based on our differing perspectives of what makes a person attractive - not saying that I am not physically attractive in the least, just that I don't buy into narcissism. The goal here is to fulfill this fantasy, however long it takes. That means this is not going to be a one-night stand kind of deal. You have to be willing to meet up as often as we both find convenient to do so until my pregnancy is confirmed. If we happen to be a year down the line and I'm still barren, then we can call it the hottest roleplay, ever, and get on with life or pursue other methods if we're both of the same mind/the chemistry is real. Something you should know is that I am not as "female" as I used to be. The change altered my hormone production and I am getting flooded with excess testosterone, essentially making me an unwilling FtM transsexual. Research that old "pregnant man" story from like ten years back to get a gist of what I'd look like while carrying a baby. (Wow, can you believe stuff like that used to be NEWS? It seems so long ago...) If after all the research is done and your penis is on board with babymaking with an attractive albeit hairy woman, then you should not wait to contact me. I did a test run some months ago on this very topic and was bombarded with replies. If you want to be the "one and only" to carry out this fantasy of mine/ours, then you should make sure to grab my attention. How can one do that, you might ask? Send me a pic of you smiling, yes, smiling. If your smile makes me smile, you will get a response quicker and we'll get right down to arranging a sensual meeting. If you don't/can't/refuse to send me a picture of yourself smiling, then I will settle for a well-described bio of yourself - the more detailed, the better. Actually, I want to read your story. And I want you to make it as X-rated sounding as possible. Just kidding. Send me your stats, some auto-bio, your reason for responding to this ad, and anything else you feel comfortable putting in an initial greeting. tl;dr You probably aren't the right person for the job if you only planned to read this. But to summarize - Me, want baby-make. You, maybe want baby-make too, or at least want to make belly swell big and then bounce before baby appear. Me, not care about looks. You, neither. We, make happy sexy fun times together thinking about me becoming preggers. Mmkay? Message and pic pwease. kbye. --------- "Man" Seeking "Woman" So, I'm 5'11'' and ~170lbs, athletic, and very intelligent. I've got bright blue eyes and dark brown hair. I'm UC educated, work hard, and play harder. I tend to joke around a lot (some might say too often, which can appear somewhat facetious), but I'm just a guy enjoying life, trying not to take things too seriously. I've got a pleasant life; I'm healthy, intelligent, attractive, successful, and apparently have no shortage of confidence. But, I'm single and would like to meet a beautiful girl. Now, this sounds like I'm in a hurry, but believe me, there is no rush. I'm perfectly content if it doesn't work out, which I believe is a good way to go about things, as I have had friends who simply decided that they needed a girlfriend with a vagina and forced a relationship with someone terrible for them, merely because she was compatible with their prejudice of what a woman is. If it works, then cool. I'm looking for a woman, so I was going to place an ad in the m4w, but upon seeing that there is no longer a separate category for stuff like that, I decided to place an ad anyway, without those pesky tags. I'm attracted to women, whether biological or not (a beautiful woman is a beautiful woman). I couldn't care less which gender you were "assigned" at birth or "acquired" during the change. Quite frankly, I don't believe anyone can "assign" another person a gender, it is something only THEY know. Actually, it was only a few months ago, while hanging out with a group of guys from my old high school class, that I became aware that there are a significant number of men who have hang ups regarding genitals. Hey, that's their prerogative, but me, I'm not missing out on a potentially amazing girl because of something so trivial! It is important to note, however, that although I don't have any hang- ups regarding your biological sex, this does not mean that I fetishize it either. I'm not seeking out someone re-gendered, rather, merely including them in my search for the perfect woman. I think I'd make an amazing boyfriend to a wonderful woman (whether genetic or otherwise)! BUT, this also means that I'm looking for someone who knows that they are female, all the time (not occasionally with certain people in the bedroom). I'm 24, so I'm looking for someone around my age. Within about six years, either side. Now, it would be rude if I didn't point out that during the change I became feminized from the waist down. I'm still technically male, but I'm definitely less male. I'm told I have a "cute" ass and legs though. Anyway, I look forward to hearing from you. PLEASE, put "SpongeBob Roundpants" in the subject of your email and include a photograph and I will reply in kind to which, I guarantee, you will not be disappointed. ---------- Person seeking Person Here I am, a very much single, African-American male, average body build, physically fit, family oriented-man, employed professionally, college educated, can travel, have my own transportation, independent, seeking person for dating, LTR or whatever. I don't drink, don't have history of smoking of any kind, and do not have pets of any sorts. I don't do clubbing. I'm also a workaholic, so I would like to meet a special someone to spend quality time with to avoid spending lots of time at work. I never thought I'd be on the internet doing this sort of thing but it is so hard to meet people in person lately. Everyone expects other people to overlook their changes, but at the same time they are freaked out by other people who aren't normal! What the hell is "normal" anymore? I promise not to be freaked out by what you are, if you can do the same for me. In fact, I think it's kind of funny we still put our "race" in these ads, as if "race" means squat now. I only do it in mine because PEOPLE STILL ASK! Ironic isn't it? Anyway, I'm looking for a person who is not crazy. If I can enjoy spending time with this person, great. If this person and I can do things of a sexual nature to each other to make us both feel good, awesome. Damn the change is all I'll say. Let's talk. I am open minded, please be the same when you see me. Will answer to all with or without pics. ----------