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Flashback – Ben – In the Moscow hospital about a week later
Tatiana just finished giving me one of her 'special' sponge baths and we were basking together in the afterglow. I metaphorically shook my head and laughed to myself - damn what a hell of a week it had been. Yes, a hell of a week so let me explain all that had transpired.
If you remember back a week ago Tatiana had fired me as her boyfriend, the Krokodil had landed to refuel, Elena had just kissed the hell out of me and Tatiana charged towards us in a fit of rage (I was sure Tatiana was going to kill Elena). Elena surprised the hell out of all of us when she slipped her hand up under her skirt, pulled out a pistol and announced (in Russian) that she worked for the FSB and was going to put Masha and Tatiana under arrest for illegally posing as FSB agents.
Tatiana stopped so fast I thought she was going to tear the soles off the bottom of her shoes. I had never seen two more surprised and scared women in my life (Tatiana and Masha); they both looked like the proverbial cat that swallowed the canary except this canary caused digestive distress. Masha began to talk, Elena pointed her pistol at her and told her to shut up. Jack didn't know what the fuck was going on because he didn't speak Russian so he began to head toward Elena. She pointed her pistol at Jack, cocked it - and that was the final straw! There was no way in hell I was going to let Elena shoot Jack (or anyone else). With all the other excitement I guess Elena forgot about me, so I rose up and clocked the hell out of her. The unintended consequence was that it hurt like hell and I passed out.
I woke up again with the Krokodil in flight. I looked around and asked where Elena was but Jack told me not to worry about it so I didn't. Besides, Tatiana had apparently hired me as her boyfriend again and was doing interesting things with her hand under the sheet that covered me.
We made it to Moscow without further incident however there was a hell of another reception for me (which was embarrassing as hell) when we arrived. I guess my exploits in the gordoc (tiny village) had once again made me a hero. Thank God they didn't give me another medal!
With Elena gone, Tatiana once again assumed the role of my personal nurse just like before and things were back to being as smooth as a baby's (or Tatiana's) butt. I know I sure enjoyed the sponge baths and extra-curricular activities from her loving ministrations.
However what Elena said still bothered me, so I once again asked the question I had asked many times before, "Tatiana, what did Elena mean when she said you and Masha had posed as FSB agents?"
Tatiana pulled away from me and complained, "Ben, are you trying to ruin the good feelings we just made?"
I smiled at her and explained, "Tatiana, sooner or later you will tell me what Elena meant and what the hell happened to her..."
Flashback – Tatiana – In Moscow about a week later
Ben had troubled me about what Elena said and where Elena was before we arrived in Moscow, yes even on the helicopter. At first I did not tell him anything but finally Masha and I invented a suitable lie which we hoped would silence Ben because that had been the only problem with our relationship since we arrived back in Moscow. The whole matter was extremely troubling since it threatened to ruin our relationship.
I smiled at Ben and attempted to relate the lie, "Ben, many times in Russia the only way to accomplish what needs to be done is for people to pose as something they are not – I know you have seen this before and understand. So yes, Masha and I have in the past posed as FSB agents."
Ben gave me and interesting look and then questioned, "That almost seems believable. Now, what happened to Elena?"
I hoped to further the tale that Masha and I had concocted, "Ben, you know how rampant bribery is in Russia - we paid her many Rubles to forget about our small transgressions."
Then Ben surprised me when he asked a different question, one which Masha and I had not anticipated...
Flashback – Ben – In Moscow about a week later
I was not 100% sure that Tatiana didn't just lie to me since I could tell she was a little nervous when I questioned her as her pulse increased and the pupils of her eyes narrowed. So I figured I would dig a little deeper, "That must have taken many Rubles. Where did you and Masha get that many Rubles?"
I realized I'd hit a nerve when Tatiana complained, "Ben, you act like you don't you believe me?"
I knew when it was time to fish or cut bait so I lied, "Why wouldn't I believe you? You did tell the truth, right?"
She became even more nervous when she stated, "Of course I told the truth. Since you have chosen to totally ruin our time this morning, I am going to get up and see what time your PT is scheduled for today."
She got out of the bed (which was by itself a wondrous sight) and began to dress. Now it was my turn so I complained, "I don't need fucking PT! I can do what needs to be done myself."
Tatiana fell back on a typical nurse's response, "Sorry, but it is doctor's orders."
I decided since she was a little pissed already, I would add some more fuel to her simmering fire (because I had a plan), "Don't give me that typical nurse bullshit or I will fire you again as my personal nurse."
She stopped midway in putting on her pantyhose, turned, glared at me and threatened, "Don't start on that again."
I began to laugh and declared, "I got you!"
She apparently didn't care much for my joke and stormed out of the room. Now that she was gone, it was time for me to do my own fucking PT. I hauled my ass out of bed and began to do some pushups...
Flashback – Tatiana and Masha – In Moscow about a week later
I could not believe that Ben was being so stubborn about the situation with Elena. He could never know the truth that Masha called some associates and they made Elena 'disappear'. I did my best to lie to Ben but it was becoming harder all the time to effectively continue the deception. For example right now, instead of checking on Ben's PT, I was meeting with Masha to give her my report.
Masha anxiously waited for me at the table in the cafeteria. As I sat down and she almost immediately asked...
I could tell that Tatiana was struggling and needed support so I asked, "Tatiana, did Ben once again ask about Elena?"
Tatiana looked at me and confirmed his behavior but then caused more concern, "Yes Masha he did and I delivered the stories we concocted. However, I am not sure he believed them. In addition, he asked a new question which we didn't anticipate."
I analyzed her appearance and realized that her feelings for Ben were seriously interfering with her ability to complete this mission. I decided to shock her, "Tatiana, if Ben or Jack discover the truth about Elena we will both end up living in a Siberian gulag."
Tatiana complained, "Masha you have it easy, Jack does not speak Russian and does not ask you any questions. However Ben speaks excellent Russian and constantly questions me."
That was the truth, I did have it easier with Jack and I didn't want to admit it but it was easier because he didn't understand Russian, however we still had some cultural problems needing resolution. So I countered, "Tatiana, I know you are capable and ready for this. Now what new question did Ben ask?"
She told me and I wanted to swear but held my tongue, thought for a few moments about pretending I sold the engagement ring Jack bought me and decided that would cause greater problems than it would solve. Besides it was a beautiful ring which Jack paid too many Rubles for! I thought for several more moments and finally suggested, "Let us tell Ben that I sold my car."
Tatiana continued her complaints, "But you never had a car and I know Ben. He will commence asking about what type of car you owned."
I wanted to tell Tatiana to make love to Ben until he forgot everything else, after all it worked like a charm with Jack. However she did have a valid point: Knowing Ben he would ask about the car. I mentioned the first car which came into my head, "Tatiana, we need to tell him it was a Lada Niva."
Tatiana irritated me when she argued, "Masha, that is a car that Ben would like and would want to know what year it was, what color it was and if you ever took the Niva off road."
I thought for a moment and confirmed her objection: Ben would like that car and those were things that Ben would want to know. So I decided to make a change and thought of the ugliest car I could. I suggested, "Let us tell Ben it was a Citroen DS."
Tatiana laughed, "Masha, that is a great idea because that car is so strange and ugly he will never ask about that car."
Tatiana looked at her watch and continued, "I need to check on Ben's PT schedule and then get back to his room. If I am not there to monitor his behavior, there is no telling what he will do."
I laughed internally - yes I certainly had a much easier time with my Jack while Ben was similar to a child who demanded almost constant attention...
Flashback – Ben and Jack – In Moscow
I was well into doing my own damn PT because the fuckers that gave me PT in the hospital were much too easy on me. Shit, I never even worked up a sweat with the baby exercises they gave me. I was surprised as shit that I hadn't gotten fat but I guess the horizontal exercises that Tatiana gave me helped to burn of some of the fat I was trying to gain – yeah, that plus seriously restricting my food intake because exercise alone wouldn't burn enough calories to keep me fit. Hell, even if could run a marathon I would only burn about 3500 calories or one pound of fat if I didn't eat anything. Damn, a Big Mac and large order of fries (not including the ketchup) was over 1000 calories. Speaking of a Big Mac, Jack walked into the room with a big smile, carrying a bag and said...
I bet Banzai was tired of the damn hospital food, so I stopped off on the way to the hospital and picked him up something I knew he'd like. I walked into his room and caught him doing pull ups by holding onto the door frame. As usual I confronted him, "Hey are you supposed to be doing pull ups?"
Banzai slid down the doorframe, hit the floor, stood for a brief moment, then his legs buckled and he slipped into a sitting position. He reached back, pulled the wheelchair close to him and climbed into it. Then he smiled and asked, "Is that what I think it is?"
I nodded and answered, "Hell yes! I figured you'd be tired of the damn food this hospital had been feeding you. Plus, I heard from reliable sources you were hardly eating."
Banzai grinned, rolled to the bed, slid into it and held out his hand. I handed him the bag and he informed and insulted me at the same time, "Jack, your sources have it all wrong: It's not that the food is that bad but I really don't want to get fat. So I am limiting my calorie intake so I don't begin to look as fat as you."
I glared at him and countered, "Like hell I'm getting fat!"
Banzai laughed and pointed, "Like hell you are not! I don't ever remember that uniform being so tight. Look in the fucking mirror and tell me I'm lying."
I looked in the mirror and Banzai was right - I had gained some weight. He took the hamburger out of the bag and then groaned, "Jack, thanks for the burger, but I'm sure as hell not going to eat the fries."
I gladly offered, "Hell, I will eat them for you."
Banzai shot down that offer and threatened, "Like hell you will Jack! Masha feeds you too damn well as it is and you don't need any more damn calories. Just remember when I get the feeling back in my legs I'm going to have to work all that fat off you!"
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