Homer loves Mindy simmons
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Present – Ben - leaving the cabin
As I continue to get the hell out of Dodge I now have some freedom for some quiet thought. Because of what Ivan said and because I amazingly saw an actual wolf, I contemplate the possibility that Destiny is a Shaman as she claims or perhaps she is one of the 'Spirit Helpers' my Grandfather told me about. At least the feeling of someone watching me has left because that feeling gives me the heebie-jeebies and the hair stands up on the back of my neck – just like the hair on the back of the fucking wolf.
I had shared my plans with Destiny, however I was sure with the change of direction and the chemical suit and booties I wore, it would make her job of finding me harder...
Present – Destiny – Searching for Ben
After I was interrupted by the dog and fox, and then running away when Ben saw me, I headed back to the clearing to pick up Ben's scent and begin following him again. However, there was one problem: With the chemical contamination equipment he wore, I couldn't pick up his scent. I knew the direction he traveled in when he first left the cabin, so I left in the same direction in hopes that I could find him.
As I continue to run it soon becomes obvious, because of the time that has elapsed, that Ben isn't heading in the same direction as before our encounter (I once more underestimated Ben and vowed to never do it again). I was wasting time so I realize the need to change my tactics. Sure of my course of action I stop and begin my search for Ben...
Present – Ben - leaving the cabin
Now what the hell is going on! I don't feel like someone is watching me - I feel like every damn animal in the world is fucking watching me! Hell, the damn squirrels are running through the trees behind (it feels like they are actually chasing me) me cussing up a storm. With all their fucking chattering, I can't hear anything else. I stop, turn, glare at the fuckers and yell, "What the hell is wrong with you! Leave me the hell alone or I will shoot your asses and eat you for lunch!"
They cuss at me as they run away and then it starts with the fucking crows! A mob of them fly up into an aspen tree and begin their infernal cawing. While squirrels are cute and serve a purpose (food), I never did have much love for crows: They are annoying as hell whose sole activity is that of fucking nest robbers. I raise my rifle to my shoulder but the fuckers take off. What the hell is next...
Damn, I shouldn't have asked. A pair of owls silently fly up (strange as hell because it's in the fucking daytime!), land on a branch in the same aspen tree and begin to stare at me with those huge, virtually unblinking eyes. I look to the sky and demand, "What the hell did I do to deserve this???"
Present – Destiny – Searching for Ben
Calling on the animals to show me Ben's location is too much fun because they annoy him and make him act crazy. Plus, it gives me great insight into Ben, how he feels about the animals and how advanced his Shamanic skills have progressed. His ability to sense when anyone or anything is watching him is highly advanced which I am sure has greatly helped him in his previous life in the Marines. I understand his feelings toward the squirrels (they are excellent food) however his feelings toward the crows is incorrect and is something I will certainly try to fix. His spooky feeling toward the owls is also a bit warped and I will need to do something about that as well.
Now that I know where Ben is, it's time for me to catch up and trail him. However, I am not sure how to keep him from sensing me watching him. I begin running toward Ben and the tranquility of the physical exercise allows my mind to finally work it out.
Present – Ben - leaving the cabin
The owls leave after looking me over and finally I lose the feeling that the entire fucking world is watching me. With my senses again at ease I take off running. I want to get as much distance between Destiny and me as I can. Hell, I even wish that Bo had shown up (by himself because the last thing I wanted was to be together with Stacy again) because he would have helped me put the miles between us even more quickly...
Present – Stacy – Going after Ben
With the COF taking care of the trailers, I stop by my camp, meet with Bill and ask, "I'm going to see if I can find Ben, do you have any ideas on where he might have gone?"
Bill smiles and answers, "Since the electronic warfare conveniently ended, the satellite you purchased for this mission has come back on line and we've been tracking two targets that have left the area. The first has to be Ben and the second is most likely the woman who helped him. He followed a circuitous route initially but has now settled down and is headed north of here."
I question, "Has everything else been prepared?"
He hands me my weapons (the two revolvers and the rifle that Ben gave me), then he hands me a GPS tracker connected to the satellites and says, "Yes, it's all ready for you, just pick up the saddle bags for Bo and Patches and you are ready to leave. However, are you sure you want to do this on your own? We could have a small team travel with you."
I smile and answer, "With the horses and Wojtek I have the best team possible for this mission. Anymore would jeopardize it. What did you find out about the mystery woman helping Ben?"
Bill shakes his head and frowns, "We didn't find out anything."
I look at him in shock and question, "Nothing at all?"
He affirms, "That's correct, it's like she's never existed. This is one more reason I feel you should bring a team."
I once again refuse, "Bill, that's not going to happen. I have my phone and you have the helicopters standing by so if I have an emergency you can respond to it. Too many people will scare Ben away and that's the last thing I want."
When I load the saddle bags on Bo, he gives me a dirty look and I scold him, "Hey, if you're coming with me you need to pull your own weight."
I begin to load Patches and once again she shows her dislike of carrying a burden by trying to bite me. I move just in time and tell her, "Sorry about this, but you also need to carry some gear."
I climb up in the saddle and practically fall off laughing when she lets loose a huge fart to show her disgust at carrying saddle bags.
I begin to ride away and remember one more thing. I ride back to Bill, stop and ask, "One more thing, what has happened to the man in the exploding port-a-potty?"
Bill answers, "He's pretty messed up but our medic has stabilized him until he can be transported to a hospital..."
Present – Masha - at the cabin with Jack
I cannot believe it! Even after I warned my husband, he chose to endanger his life by trying to disarm the traps in the portable toilets. He could not leave well enough alone until we had an expert here to take care of the situation.
I arrive at the practically destroyed portable toilet where a medic is already working on my husband and my Jack looks terrible. I ask the medic, "How is my husband?"
He answered, "He's lucky as hell that only half the trap triggered or there would have been nothing left of him but tiny pieces. Now the problem is I have to treat him while being careful to not trigger the other half of the trap and blowing all of us to hell."
I begin to bargain with him on how I will disable the trap when fortune smiles upon me...
Present – Inga - at the cabin with Masha
I run up, stop beside Masha and look at her husband Jack in the half-destroyed portable toilet (he looks very bad). Masha smiles at me and says (in Russian), "Inga I am happy you are here, Jack is in grave danger because half of the portable toilet trap did not explode."
I understand what Masha is asking so I volunteer, "Masha, I will gladly disarm the remaining trap in the portable toilet."
She cautions, "Inga please make certain not to trigger it or my husband will die never seeing his daughter."
I inform the medic, "I am a bomb disposal expert and would like your permission to disarm the bomb."
He answers, "That would be great because I'm not sure how much time it will take to stabilize this man."
I move into the half-destroyed toilet (it is a stinking a mess of feces and urine!). I notice the foul mixture has covered most of Masha's husband Jack including his wounds. Then I continue my discussion with Masha to keep her distracted, "How have you been feeling during this pregnancy?"
Masha answers, "Not as bad as the last one, I think it is because she's a girl."
I continue my work, the detonation mechanism is deceptively devious, and reply, "You might enjoy it now but remember she will become a teenager. With your boy Ivan you only need to be concerned with his хуи (dick) with a teenage daughter you will have to worry about all the other boy's хуиs."
Masha laughs and answers, "You are incorrect: With a boy as cute as Ivan and the crazy teenage girls now days, I have to worry about all the teenage girl's влагалищеs (vaginas) and their ability to become беременна (pregnant)! And I won't have to worry about such things with our daughter."
I do not understand so I question, "Why not? Don't tell me you are going to start her on the pill."
Masha laughs and answers, "You forgot about Jack, I am sure he will put the fear of God into any boy that comes close to our daughter."
Then we hear some good news...
Present – Jack – in the half-destroyed Port-a-potty
I begin to wake up and feel like shit! The bastard Mike had a secondary trigger circuit on the Port-a-potty bomb I missed and it blew me to hell and back. I hear Masha telling someone that I would 'put the fear of God into any boy that comes close to our daughter' and correct her, "Masha that's not correct: I will put the fear of hell and me into any boy that comes close to our daughter."
I hear Masha's voice crack as she answers, "Jack, my Jack, you are alive."
I fight back the pain and answer, "Of course I'm alive. It takes more than that little popgun of a charge to kill me."
I hear a woman's voice which I don't recognize as she orders, "Jack, keep perfectly still. You only detonated half the charge that was placed inside the portable toilet."
I quickly remark, "I don't know who the fuck you are but be careful. That bastard Mike has a secondary trigger circuit..."
She interrupts me, "My name in Inga, I am a friend of Masha and do not worry. I have already found the second and third trigger circuits and disabled them. All that is left is the primary trigger circuit."
I swore, "Hells bells a third trigger circuit, I totally missed that."
Masha scolds me, "Jack I asked you not to do anything crazy and you didn't listen to me and almost died. Will you promise me to listen to me the next time?"
I cross my fingers and answer, "Of course my love."
Then Inga spoils my plans when she announces, "Masha, Jack had his fingers crossed during his answer to you."
Masha questions, "What does that mean?"
Inga explains to her, "Masha, Americans cross their fingers when they tell a lie to ward off evil spirits."
Masha starts to berate me when thank God a familiar voice intervenes...
Present – Byron - at the half-destroyed port-a-potty
I make it to the Port-a-potty disaster site, see Jack is awake and tease, "Hey you crusty old fart, what are you doing - lying down on the job?"
Jack laughs at my insult, begins to cough, and Inga complains, "Jack, I told you to remain motionless."
Jack insults both of us, "Hell, how many women do I have telling me what I can and cannot do and Byron you're older than dirt so I don't know what the fuck you're doing calling me a crusty old fart."
Inga looks up at me, shakes her head and I wonder what the hell is going on. The medic announces, "Well I need to transport this man to the hospital."
Aspen
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