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The Naga, the Fox and the Wardrobe

The door of the wardrobe didn’t move.

Puzzled, Mike grabbed the handle even tighter and pulled again, but it still wouldn’t budge. The wardrobe felt like it had been anchored into the wall, the door completely immobile. Frustrated, he tried rattling the door when he realized that he had missed one very important detail. Right below the handle was a small keyhole.

“Ugh.” He got ready to kick the wardrobe out of frustration when he remembered that he had a key sitting in his dresser. It was the one he had found last week in the downstairs front closet. Excited, he started running back to his bedroom, pausing immediately upon entering.

“What the fuck am I doing?”

He turned back and stared at the mysterious wardrobe. Even from here, he could feel its pull on him. What could be on the other side of those doors that entranced him so? It wasn’t just curiosity or a need to feel like he was making progress with the house. Something magical was trying to lure him into the wardrobe, and he wondered if it had his best interest at heart.

He moved toward the wardrobe again, but turned at the stairs, running down them once he looked away. Already, the mystical pull was fading. Once at the bottom, he went out the back door to find Zel, Abella, and Naia sitting around the fountain.

“Hey, I need a favor.” He sat on the water’s edge. “There’s a key in the top drawer of my dresser. Can somebody go get it and give it to Naia?” He briefly explained the magical compulsion of the wardrobe to all of them along with the memory of Emily using portals to travel. “I don’t want to go wandering in without thinking things through first. I’m fairly certain that it goes somewhere, but don’t know for certain, and I’m worried the key may have the same spell on it or something.”

“I’m on it.” Zel walked to the house, her hooves clomping on the wood once she was in the door.

“Someone’s learning caution,” Naia said, kissing Mike on the forehead. After waiting a minute, she vanished with a splash then reappeared, the small key in her hand.

His heart pumped frantically, and his hand shot out to grab it from her. At the last second, he closed his fingers and pulled his hand back. He knew he had made the correct decision.

“Hold onto it for me? Until I’m ready.”

She grinned. “Yes, but only for a bit. Anything I take down there alters the flow of my spring, and I’m running out of good places to shove things.”

“I’ll deal with it soon.” He let out a sigh of relief when Naia swallowed it and it vanished from sight. “I just thought it would be best if I didn’t wander off to some other part of the planet with nobody knowing where I went.”

“Agreed.” Abella put a hand on his shoulder. She smiled, the fused crack in her face glinting in the sunlight. It was the stone equivalent of a scar, yet somehow the flaw looked good on her. It traveled down her forehead, across her eye and then along her cheek. “We can’t bail you out if we don’t know where you are.”

He smiled but didn’t feel good about it on the inside. “Well, at least I know I can count on you.”

She smiled, her azure eyes glittering in the daylight.

Zel stepped out of the backdoor, her hooves clomping on the pavement.

“Check it out!” She lifted up her skirt to reveal that she had put on a pair of Mike’s boxers. “There’s even a tail hole in the back!” She spun around to reveal that she had practically destroyed the fly of his underwear by pulling her tail through.

Naia laughed, the sound snapping Mike out of his funk. He stood up and gave Zel a hug. “You can keep that pair. I don’t need them anymore.”

“Really?” She did a little spin, releasing her skirt. “They aren’t as lacy as the ones Abella showed me on her tablet.”

“You’ve been showing her underwear on your tablet?” he asked the gargoyle.

“A bit of this and that.” Abella shrugged, crossing her arms. “Sometimes the people in my videos wear underwear.”

“But never for very long,” Zel added. “If they know they’re going to have sex, why do they bother getting dressed at all?”

Of course. Mike laughed again, the tension caused by the wardrobe fading from his mind. “If Abella’s been showing you porn, I suspect you have lots of questions, actually. We can address those later.” He turned his attention to the nymph. “Naia, do you know anything about the wardrobe?”

“Doesn’t ring any bells, lover.” She sat on a fountain of water. ‘It feels the same as earlier. I don’t remember, but I feel like I really should.”

“That’s a shame.”

“I would like to look at it with you,” Zel said. “I think it’s fascinating that you have an enchanted wardrobe.”

“Who has an enchanted wardrobe?” Ratu came out of the backdoor, her white kimono decorated with a golden dragon that flew around on the fabric, spiraling around her chest before disappearing.

“I do. I think I’m being magically compelled to check it out.”

“I see. I would love to take a look at it with you. But first,” she held up the magical emerald. “Naia, if you would?”

The nymph sighed. “Toss it in.”

Ratu obliged, the emerald splashing in the fountain and then disappearing. “I had a breakthrough this morning regarding that particular piece of magic.”

“You did? What is it?”

“It’s interesting, that’s what.” Ratu sat on the edge of the fountain and hiked up her kimono, revealing her scaly legs. She turned to lie on her back, unfolding the front of her kimono until she was barely covered. “The sun feels good today.”

“Ratu, c’mon.” He sat next to her, wondering what she was up to.

“Rub my feet and I’ll tell you.” She gave him a wink, and he rolled his eyes. He took her demure foot in his hands and began kneading the flesh around the base of her toes.

“Ah, that feels good. Anyway, like I was saying, the emerald is one of the more amusing trinkets I’ve come across. Bluntly put, it grants you a wish.”

“Wait, what?” Mike stopped squeezing. Ratu gave him a small kick with her free foot until he continued.

“You heard me. Nothing big, mind you, but it can do little things. It calibrates to your heart’s desire, and that’s what its function becomes. Magic like this is extremely powerful. If you desired money, the emerald would attune to that desire and help you find it. If you wanted power, it could do that. That’s why I wasn’t able to figure out what it did for so long. I didn’t have a strong enough desire for its abilities to manifest, so it’s just been sitting on my desk, raw potential waiting to take form.”

“Oh, like a magical catalyst!” Zel exlaimed, then ran to the garage and returned with a notebook. From where he sat, Mike could see that she was drawing the emerald from memory.

“That’s another way of putting it. Mike, are you doing something different with your hair?” Ratu was looking at the top of his head.

“What?” He stopped rubbing her feet and felt his hair. “No, why?”

She shrugged. “Looks different today, like it’s fuller or something. Anyway, the previous king of rats wanted an army to protect his people. Thus the emerald gave him the power to animate furniture. Our desires are largely open to interpretation, so the gem does its best to accommodate.”

“But then what was the deal with Jenny?” he asked.

“Oh, that’s my favorite. Your little friend is cursed to live in a doll forever. As a result, her desires are a little out of whack. What happened when she was under the effects of the gem?”

He blushed. Everybody had heard from Tink about the incident in the church. It wouldn’t have bothered him as much if it hadn’t happened in front of Beth. “She trapped me in a dream and seduced me.”

“You are half correct. Oh, yes, I love it when you hit that spot.” He was now squeezing the space between her big toe and the one next to it. “I am under the impression that Jane wanted certain experiences prior to her death. Her desire manifested as a grand illusion, allowing you to be with her intimately. Part of me wonders if her memory hasn’t been permanently altered as a result. She may truly believe now that your interaction occurred so many centuries ago.”

He frowned, thinking back on the encounter. “That makes sense, I guess. But it was more than that. Jenny was being weird and kept transforming into herself. It seemed like she was talking to me, but also like she was just babbling.”

“That’s something I don’t have an answer for.”

“Hmm.” He continued rubbing, working his way back toward her heel.

Abella flew off, no longer interested in the conversation. The blast from her wings disturbed the loose dirt around the fountain, scattering it outward.

There was something more to what Ratu had said. “Jane wanted a future more than anything, not just sex. So why just that moment? Why not bring her back to life or something?”

“A future, huh?” Ratu turned her head toward Naia, her outstretched hand playing in the water. “Any ideas, nymph?”

“You said that she was saying weird things, right?” Naia held up a sphere of water. “Like what?”

“I don’t remember, honestly. She kept changing back and forth between Jenny and Jane, which was pretty distracting. I did notice the emerald kept feeding her magic, and her eyes were glowing. Now I’m worried because she hasn’t spoken to anybody since then.”

“A spiritual manifestation like that must have exhausted her.” Ratu flicked the water. “Now I wonder something. You say that Jane desired a future. How would the gem interpret such a thing and give it to her?”

“By letting her see the future! Like a prophecy.” Zel said, underlining something on the page. Everyone looked at her. “Weird phrases, glowing eyes. All the hallmarks of precognition.”

“Seriously?” He looked at Ratu. “Is that possible?”

“Perhaps.”

He sighed. “That kind of makes sense. It almost seemed like Jane and Jenny were two distinct beings. Is the emerald powerful enough to treat someone like that as two separate people?”

“I imagine so. Jenny is a bit of a special case. She is unable to move on, trapped on the material plane. The rules are likely different for her.”

“Okay, so now that we know what it does, what now? Should I have you destroy it? It seems like it would be fairly dangerous.”

“Maybe. I see no reason to rush though.” She winked at him. “And neither should you.” She poked him with her free foot. “Unless you have somewhere else to be?”

He laughed. “No, I really don’t.”

Mike continued to rub her feet, listening to the others talk. If Jenny really had seen the future, what had it been? His thoughts had been all consumed by Cecilia’s absence as well as Emily’s mysterious schemes. The embarrassment involving Beth hadn’t helped matters either, forcing him to put it out of his mind. He had no idea if it had been real or a dream, but ultimately it didn’t matter.

“When do you think we could examine this wardrobe of yours?” Ratu asked, snapping him away from his thoughts.

“This afternoon, I guess. I would like to check in with Reggie and Tink first so they know where I’m going. Then we can properly prepare.” If such a thing was even possible, he thought.

“Sounds good. Come and get me when you’re ready. I’m just going to soak up some sun.” She slid the kimono off her body, lying naked on the stone wall, soaking up the heat from the sun. Snakeskin patterns shifted on her flesh and she closed her eyes, a thin smile crossing her face. Soon she was scaly from head to toe, and he couldn’t help but stare at her for a little bit.

“I can’t wait to document it. Sounds like the wood itself is enchanted. If so, I wonder if I could find a way to grow some.” Zel shut her notebook and tucked her pencil behind her ear. “I’ll be around.” She blew him a kiss and disappeared into the garage.

Mike sat on the wall, watching Ratu doze. Naia’s birds were singing her various tunes, landing in the upper tier of her fountain. He fought the urge to go on about his business, choosing instead to enjoy this moment of peace. A strange feeling in his gut told him that it would be the last one for a while.

Beth opened her eyes, blinking several times. She had fallen asleep at the desk in the office, her laptop still open and some documents spread out before her. Yawning, she checked the time. She must have conked out over an hour ago.

Stretching her arms, she couldn’t help but lean back and stare at the moulding on the ceiling. The grooves had dirt and what looked like soot in some places, which wouldn’t entirely surprise her. She grabbed her coffee cup and lifted it to her face.

That was odd. It was still mostly full. She sipped at it and made a face. It had gone cold.

Her cell phone rang and she was tempted to let it go to voicemail until she saw that her phone was displaying a picture of a young woman with red and black hair with a cartoon halo over her head giving the camera the finger.

“Lily?” she answered. “When did you put your picture on my phone? Hell, when did you get a phone?”

The succubus chuckled on the other end. “When you were sleeping, of course. I put myself in the night before I left.”

“Figures.” Beth pushed off the desk with her foot, and the chair she sat on spun around to face one of the windows. “How is Colorado?”

“We’re not in Colorado anymore. Haven’t been for a couple days.”

“Where are you?”

“California.” Lily sighed. “We ran into some problems on our way here and things got ... complicated.”

“Are you okay? What about Dana?” Beth hadn’t gotten a chance to know the zombie very well and had more than a little anxiety about letting her roam the countryside.

“We’re fine for now. I was calling home because I need money for a plane ticket?”

“To where?”

“I would rather not say. I just need some numbers from you so I can finish paying online.”

“I thought Dana couldn’t ride on a plane? Something about biting the other passengers.”

Lily chuckled again. “She’s too big for carry-on, but not for checked bags. I’m traveling as you, by the way. Have you ever wanted to join the Mile High Club?”

“Please don’t fuck people looking like me.” She frowned. “There’s no way she’s going to pass for luggage. Isn’t there a weight limit?”

“A hundred pounds is the limit.”

“There’s no way Dana weighs less than a hundred.”

“She does without her legs.”

It took Beth several seconds to process what Lily had just said. “Care to repeat that? I think I misheard you.”

“Her legs come off. Well, they can, and we can put them back on later. I have them in my carry-on.”

“That’s...” several words filtered through Beth’s mind. Disgusting, macabre, horrifying. “Don’t they smell?”

“Now now, that’s extremely rude. As long as she gets a good jolt of magic juice after we stitch them back on, she’ll be fine.”

“How do you know that?”

There was a long pause before Lily responded. “Like I said, things got complicated, but our girl is handling whatever death throws at her like a champ.”

“What about the x-ray scanners?”

Lily chuckled. “Tick-Tock is the bag. They can only see what he wants them to. That’s if he doesn’t just get up and walk around the scanner. Wouldn’t put it past him.”

“He?”

“That’s how Dana refers to him. Said since he was a grandfather clock, it only made sense.”

Beth sighed. “Please don’t get me banned by TSA. Or fuck people in my body. Promise me those things and I’ll give you what you need.”

“Yes, boss,” Lily replied.

Beth pulled out a credit card and read off the numbers. She wasn’t worried about the cost---Mike would reimburse her.”Did you get that?”

“Yep. Plane leaves soon, so gotta go. Tell Romeo hi for me.” There was a click and then silence. Beth lowered the phone, staring at it. What on earth was Lily up to?

Her phone dinged, and a text message came through. It was a photo of Beth with her tongue out standing in front of a mirror, a slender leg draped across her shoulder like a scarf. Behind her, Dana was busy trying to fit herself in a large suitcase, her head and one arm still hanging out.

“Holy shit.” Shaking her head, Beth put her phone away. It really was better if she didn’t think about what those two were up to, but she was happy that they were okay. Picking up her stuff, she looked at her computer screen.

“Weird.” Several documents were open on her screen, many of them pertaining to Emily’s holdings. Why had she been looking those up? She closed the windows and shut her computer down. She had come to the office to avoid the hustle and bustle of the house. Sofia had gotten into an argument with the fairies after they got into the flour, and Tink was upstairs doing God knew what with a power saw and with the rats helping her. Her room was close enough to Mike’s that she could hear him moaning in the bathtub.

The thought of him made the blood rush to her face. It was a frustrating feeling in a lot of ways, because she knew that the attraction was largely due to his bond with Naia. While he had been cute in a broken puppy kind of way when they first met, she wouldn’t have bothered pursuing their relationship any farther. Now, however, he radiated sex appeal like a tiny star, yet acted awkwardly whenever she was around. She had noticed that he treated her differently than the others, and wondered if she was lacking the monstrous charms of the other residents.

Did she desire the man, or the magic?

It was a question she couldn’t answer, but it made her stomach feel funny in a way that usually required a trip to see Asterion in the Labyrinth. The minotaur was more than happy to play with her, but he was more than a little short on ideas during sex.

Oh well. At least he took direction well. She picked up her coffee and remembered that it was cold once it touched her lips. Frowning, she set it back down. Her thoughts went back to Mike and the scene of him standing in the church, his dick exposed for her to see.

“Damn it.” She stuck her head out of the office and waited. It didn’t take long before one of the fairies shot past, likely looking for or running from trouble. Beth had realized that they were largely bored and needed to be given something to do.

“Hey Olivia.” The green light returned and hovered in front of Beth. If she squinted, she could just make out the feminine form in the middle. “Can you go and ask Asterion if he can meet me at the greenhouse? Let me know when he is on his way.”

“Okay,” Olivia said with a giggle, and flew up the stairs toward Beth’s room, eager to help out.

Mike sat on the porch swing, letting the wind slowly rock him. Any moment he expected Cecilia to return, to speak to him in that fantastic foreign lilt of hers. Though the others reassured him that she was fine, something was bothering him and he couldn’t quite put his finger on it.

“Something bugging you?”

He looked up and saw Abella’s face leaning over the roof, her thick hair slowly succumbing to gravity. A sigh escaped him and he leaned back in the swing.

“Yeah. I thought that dealing with the former rat king would give me a break, but between whatever Emily was doing and Cecilia being gone, I just can’t seem to relax. I feel like something is about to happen, and I’m worried it’s going to happen when I go in that wardrobe. I’m also worried about that emerald. If it was so powerful, why did she just give it to the rats?” He looked at her. “Oh, right. Ratu learned that the emerald can apparently grant wishes or something like that.”

“So I heard.” She tapped her ear knowingly. “Even up here, I could hear you all talking.”

“Right.” He seemed to forget that. Abella, the home’s stone guardian was always watching, always listening. “So yeah. Something is bugging me, but I have no idea what.”

“Here.” She held out her hand.

“What?” He reached out, expecting her to hand him something. Instead, she grabbed onto his wrist and casually pulled him off the porch, his legs dangling over the yard below. With a flap of her wings, they took to the sky and she did a quick spiral of the house. His stomach threatened to leap out of his body while he watched the ground below twist back and forth.

They landed by the turret on a flat piece of roof. He sat down and Abella leaned against the roof, her tail twitching back and forth.

“I want to show you something.” She crouched down, lying flat against the roof. “Get down or he’ll see you.”

“He?”

“Mister fancy pants.” She placed her hand on his head and pushed him prone. They laid this way for several minutes, and Abella lifted her head just enough that she was gazing across the yard. Several minutes passed, and Mike wondered if he was in danger.

“There he is. Move slowly.”

He sat up and saw Sebastien slowly cross between the two lions. He twirled his cane and leaned on it, his eyes on the house.

“What are we doing up here?”

“Blowing off steam.” She reached across the roof and picked up a large brick.

“Where did that come from?” he asked.

“Construction site down the road.” She grinned. “Keep watching, this really pisses him off.”

“Okay.” Abella cocked her arm, her eyes narrowing. After a couple of seconds, she flung her whole body forward, the brick sailing through the air and smashing through Sebastien’s skull. His upper body exploded into sand, his limbs twitching as his golem fell apart.

Abella’s wings beat quickly and she soared down to where the sand was busy trying to reform. Flapping her wings, she landed hard, scattering the grains with heavy wing beats. The sand tried to resist her at first, attempting to reform into Sebastien, but she kept at it, swirling him apart. Eventually, the sand had been scattered into the bushes and grass, and she took off, flying back to the roof and landing gently.

“That really pisses him off,” she said, making a fist. “Takes him nearly an hour to reform.”

“That is pretty funny.”

“He has another one down the block that watches me do that.” She pointed and he followed her finger. This version of Sebastien was dressed as a jogger, his arms and legs pumping as he ran. “I don’t dare fly past the lions to try it with him while he’s watching me. He’s carrying a wand in his shorts and I don’t want to get blasted out of the sky.”

“Good. I don’t want anything to happen to you.” He leaned against the wall of the turret. “So is this what you do for fun? Throw bricks at that asshole?”

“One of the things.” Her cheeks darkened. “I often hear you with the others, so that causes, um, distractions.”

“I see.” He looked around, realizing that nobody would wander by to bother them. Even the fairies weren’t flying around up here. He had realized lately that it was difficult to truly be alone with anyone in the house. It was becoming a regular waystation for all the creatures under his roof.

The breeze was nice, but not as nice as the smile on the gargoyle’s face.

“Maybe I could use a distraction.” He moved closer and touched her skin, his fingers sliding up the thick marble of her thigh. Her flesh yielded only slightly when pressed, but her skin was perfectly smooth, like polished marble. “What do you think?”

“Out here? In the open? What would the neighbors think?” She winked at him, tilting her leg in his direction, opening herself up.

“Huh. It occurs to me that I don’t actually know my neighbors.”

Abella laughed. “They have almost no idea you exist. The geas messes with their squishy little brains. When Emily first lived here, there were a couple of them who threw neighborhood parties in the summer and stuff like that. She described it as recognizing someone you hadn’t seen in a while, but couldn’t put a name to the face. She would just introduce herself as the new neighbor, but apparently some of the people would actually notice the house for the first time, so she quit doing that.”

“Interesting.” He stroked her inner thigh, his fingers running along the creases. He wondered how her muscles were able to flex, if it was driven by magic or if her cells were a unique blend of minerals. “So the house sort of fades away.”

“Yep. Your eyes have difficulty focusing on it, like it’s trying to blend in with the landscape. I’ve watched plenty of people walk by and look surprised when they see it, but then they just keep on going as if they’ve already forgotten. When Tink was little, she used to conduct experiments with the geas, to see what people noticed or didn’t. As long as there wasn’t a physical interaction, anything abnormal simply didn’t register with whoever was looking.”

“Physical interaction?”

Abella laughed, pulling up on his shirt to reveal his stomach. “Tink got grounded once for using a stick to trip people as they walked by. People came to the door to yell at Emily for letting her kid wear a Halloween mask in the summer while harassing them. They forgot about it later, but she didn’t like that Tink called attention to herself like that.”

He chuckled. “I can only imagine.”

“So I have a question.” Abella touched the scar tissue along his side. “How did this happen? It feels so different from the rest.”

“Car accident.” He sighed. “I was in a pretty bad accident when I was younger and almost died. The car caught on fire and I got burned and cut up pretty bad. Luckily, it was mostly superficial, but it didn’t heal well enough to cover it up.”

“It feels different than the rest.”

“Yeah. Scar tissue is different from regular skin, because of how it grows.” He touched the scar on her face. He could feel the slight indentation where it sank in, the stone becoming dark and revealing glittering granules inside. “But it’s different for gargoyles. You cracked instead of getting burned.”

“Yeah.” Abella blushed. “I thought it would be worse, but Beth helped me fix it as best as she could. It will fade, but will take several centuries.”

“Yeah, well maybe my scars would fade if I could live that long. Humans aren’t that great at living past that first century.” He let his hand fall onto her chest, moving it over her right breast. He loved how it felt, that unyielding smoothness.

“The first century is super hard on gargoyles too. It’s similar to a human’s teen years and many of us perished due to stupid decisions.”

“Such as?”

She laughed. “Scaring the shit out of people by pretending to be statues was a common trick, but the worst involved swooping down and picking people up and then dropping them. Gargoyles, for lack of a better word, can be dicks. It’s part of the reason so many of us were hunted and killed, and I can’t really blame humans for it. I might even argue that our behavior caused us to be hunted in the first place.”

“Did you used to do stuff like that?”

“Well...” she dragged the word out while unbuttoning his pants. “I spent more of my time pretending to be a statue just to people watch. But early in my adventures I was hiding in a large garden when I spotted the master of the house with one of his maids in the twilight hours.”

“Oh?”

She laughed. “He lifted her skirt and took her from behind. It was super casual, with no words spoken. I hung around the estate for many years and found out that he had several bastard children with the help. His own wife was no better. Theirs had been a marriage of convenience, to tie two families together in a trading company partnership. As luck would have it, both of them were very into women.”

“That must have made the hiring process easier.” He shifted, moving in front of her. “Can you scoot down a little?”

“Sure.” She lifted her hips and leaned back. “Like this?”

“Perfect.” He had no hope of being able to lift her himself. The base of her tail kept her hips off the ground and he ran his fingers along her thighs until they met in the middle. She let out a small moan, then reached between his hands to stroke his stiffening cock.

He explored the thin edges of all three of her labia, moving his fingers inside of her. He could feel that reflexive squeeze, but it was different from the other girls. Her vaginal walls rotated when she clenched, and her outer lips slid across each other like the aperture of a camera lens.

“Anyway, he would bring the maids out and fuck them, almost always on the same bench. I would sometimes stand there for days, just waiting for a closer look.”

“And they never noticed the strange statue that kept moving around?”

“Please. Rich people don’t know how many statues they have.” She slid her thumb over the head of his penis, teasing the hole with the edge of her thumb. “Do you like how that feels? I saw it in a movie.”

“Yeah, but be careful with your thumbnail.” He looked down at the dark talons on her hands. “That’s a sensitive area.”

“But the danger makes it fun, non?” She traced the edge of his frenulum with her nail. “I believe there’s a part of me that is far more entertaining than my hands.” She pushed his arms aside and sat forward, her mouth now inches from his cock. “And a lot softer too.”

“You’ll have to show--” he lost his train of thought when she inhaled him completely in one go. Her tongue wrapped around the base of his shaft, providing a smooth, slippery texture for him to slide forward along. The back of her throat slid over his glans and she gurgled, the vibration making his eyes roll up in his head.

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Daryl stood outside the garage apartment, staring up at the windows above the garage door. It had been no easy matter tracking down the delivery girl. Luckily, she worked several jobs around town, and was well known by name at more than a few establishments. Those who knew her also knew her story. Apparently the love of her life had died in a terrible motorcycle accident. They had scraped what was left of Alex Winters off of the highway, leaving behind grieving parents and a closed casket...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 11 The Worst Place on Earth

“Did you have a good nap?” The voice was cold, snapping Mike out of his slumber. Tink’s arms clutched him tightly, and he pushed the blankets off of his head, staring at the dark figure in his room. He reached out to touch the lamp, warm light bathing the angry figure in the doorway. She stood with her arms crossed and a messenger bag slung over her shoulder. “Uh ... hi Beth.” Mike slid sideways out of the blankets. “So, uh, I’m sure you have some questions.” Sitting up, Mike tried to keep...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 11 Nine of Wands

Mike wasn’t sure what he expected to see once inside the tower, but it certainly wasn’t this. What he had thought was the entrance to the tower was in fact an outer wall. A large courtyard full of flowers and creeper vines would have been impressive enough, but the sheer number of butterflies, bees, and even birds had him staring in awe. An entire ecosystem had been formed inside these walls, complete with a small waterfall that flowed out of the cliff itself and fed into an irrigation...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 12 Shocking Developments

Mike stared at the piece of paper in front of him, then looked up. Jenny stood on the other side of the paper, holding a large pencil in both hands. She was tapping her foot impatiently. He sighed. “How about W?” Jenny drew the last leg on the hanging stick figure, then drew an X over each of his eyes. He heard a distant cackle come from all around the room, and she dropped her pencil. He scrutinized the puzzle before him and then looked at her. Somehow, despite guessing all the vowels,...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 13 Purgatory

The gray skies of the Underworld did little to improve Mike’s mood, and the occasional wail from the house made his stomach sour. Yet he sat quietly as Yuki told Amymone about how she had escaped from her tower. “ ... and after we sent the Society packing, Mike forgave me for trying to kill him.” Her tale done, Yuki put her hands in her lap. “And so I live in the house again. It’s really weird that nobody remembers me, but I’m hoping to try and rebuild those relationships. It’s frustrating,...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 2 The Library

Mike held the small sledgehammer in both hands, dubious that he would be able to strike another living being with it, much less a minotaur. Still, it was better than nothing, which made him feel a little bit better. Mike had debated purchasing a gun, but he knew next to nothing about them other than to point the long, skinny end at stuff you wanted to kill. His lack of education aside, Naia had warned him against such a purchase for the sole reason that she had no idea what other creatures...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 3 Girl of My Dreams

Mike yawned, covering his mouth, then set his book down on the cart. It was dangerously full, and he knew that Sofia would ream him out if he just kept cramming books onto it. “Can you take this to the platform?” he asked Death. “Yes I can, Mike Radley.” The grim reaper grabbed the cart with bony hands and pushed it down the corridor, the wheels squeaking softly. Mike rubbed his eyes and yawned again, then checked his phone. He had no signal in the Library, but all he wanted was to see the...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 16 Day of the Dead

Dana was upstairs when she heard the front door explode. Quetzalli emerged from her bedroom with a concerned look on her face, and the two of them rushed to the top of the stairs to look below. There was a flash of light, followed by a scream from Beth. Quetzalli was already heading for the stairs when a man in a hoodie pointed his wand up at her and hissed something under his breath. Dana shoved Quetzalli out of the way in time to catch the brunt of the magic, and the shockwave carried both...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 12 The Coming Storm

Kali’s fists clenched and unclenched in the back of the town car. Daryl was kneeling on the floor in front of her, contemplating the large patch of skin that had been blasted off the side of her ribs. He gave it a gentle tug, making Kali wince. “You always impress me,” Daryl said, pulling a scalpel from the small kit on the floor. “Anyone else would have passed out from the pain.” “I don’t feel pain.” Her eyes bulged from her head, many of the veins burst from the lightning blast. Daryl...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 5 Firing Squad

“Ow, fuck!” Mike winced as Naia inspected the large bruise forming above his hip bone where Abella had squeezed him with her stony thighs. The Mandragora plant had actually injured him less than the gargoyle had, surprisingly enough. Save for some scrapes on his hands (well, and not being eaten), he was fine. “Yeah, that will sting for a while.” Naia placed a kiss on it. “You had me so worried! I’ve never seen the Mandragora do that before. You’re going to need to feed it pretty...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 15 Samhain

Mike sat with Naia on the edge of the fountain, their arms wrapped around each other. He took in her scent, which was reminiscent of rain and the forest floor. When she finally released him, she had a scowl fixed on her face. “You had better come back alive,” she told him. “Or I will be very cross with you.” “Don’t worry. I’m going to be very careful. If things start to go south before I get there, I’ll come back and try again next year.” Truthfully, he hoped that wasn’t the case. How many...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 5 Naughty Devils

Beth stepped out of the secret tunnel into the center of the Labyrinth, her shoe catching a rock and sending it skittering across the cold stone. Up above, a large gemstone shone like a tiny star, warming the entire room to a comfortable temperature. Large tables were covered in different magical items in various states of disrepair, and rats moved around in the shadows, carrying what looked like rocks of different sizes. Ratu was leaning over a stack of books, her kimono hanging open and...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 17 Battlegrounds

The technicolor clouds of the Dreamscape parted as Mike fell through them, and he flipped himself over in an attempt to finally stick the landing on the beach. For a moment, he thought he had it, but at the last second his feet swung out from under him and he slammed into the ground hard enough that the beach crumbled beneath him. He fought to stay above the flowing sand that rushed in to fill the gap, and was busy pinwheeling his arms when a golden ray of light broke through the sky above to...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 9 Getting a Head

Beth scowled at the water. She was sitting on the shore of the Labyrinth’s circular river, watching it rush past. Her knees were pulled against her chest beneath a powder blue skirt, and she tossed another rock into the cold water. It disappeared with a small splash, and Asterion lifted his head from his position next to her to see what had happened. “Is everything okay?” he asked. She rolled her eyes, but didn’t look at the minotaur. “Yeah, it’s fine.” In truth, it wasn’t. Ever since her...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 10 Finding the Center

“ ... and that brings me to here.” Dana sat on the edge of the fountain, her chin in her hands. She wondered if she should feel more upset, regaling the others with her tale. Tears were beyond her ability. The strange numbness of her body applied even more so to her eyes. She could no longer feel them, and it was taking effort to remember to blink. “So if I don’t deliver Mike or whatever special treasure the house hides, he will leave me like this.” Naia, Cecilia, and Zel looked at each...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 9 Nightmares and Dreamscapes

His soul floated, hiding just beneath his skin, dreading the moment that his eyes would open, streaming reality in High Definition through his very being. It wasn’t that he was afraid to face the morning, but rather that he was afraid of how much pain he would be in upon awakening. The morning before, his whole being had been in agony. Between fucking Jenny out of Beth and then carrying Beth home, he wondered if his body would decide to be tired or sore instead. How does a body decide how...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 4

Stirring Memories The group was huddled on the floor, staring at the mock map Mike had made of the hallway. He had used his knife to carve wooden blocks from the still flopping dresser, lying the pieces end to end. The smaller ones had already stopped shaking, and the larger ones were weakening. Cecilia hovered overhead, and Carmina stood amongst the blocks. Carmina had gone first, flying along the ceiling and then back again. Cecilia had become invisible, traversing the same distance. The...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 6 A Series of Unfortunate Events

Kali stood in the front yard, her dark eyes focused on the Radley house. She could see tell-tale signs of the Geas all around her like a giant, magical bubble that shifted away from her when she tried to pop it. She had been fascinated by the spell ever since she had heard about it, but had been warned away from trying to mess with it. While Emily was alive, any attempt to come near the house had ended in death for Society members after the fiasco with Garrett. After Emily had died, she and...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 15 The Devil

Yuki sat on the porch swing, staring out at the front yard with a cup of tea in her hands. The debris from the magic storm was strewn across the grounds, making the land look like a small junkyard. Somehow, it served as a perfect metaphor for her life right now, a giant mess with nobody to help clean it up. She took a sip of tea, letting out a sigh as the hot liquid streamed down her throat. The front door opened behind her and Mike walked out, then sat down next to her on the swing. She...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 7 What About the Creepy Doll

“Actually, there is something.” Mike carefully walked around the furniture in the room, pulling the doll from the mantle of the fireplace. He came back, handing it to her. The docile porcelain features of the doll gazed imploringly into Beth’s eyes, as if it was sad to be leaving. “I don’t care how, just get rid of it.” Beth realized that even she thought the doll was spooky. Staring into its painted eyes, she couldn’t help but laugh. “I’m on it. Have a good night, Mike.” She left him, a...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 6

Big Hands, Big Feet The walk back through the tunnels was uneventful. Back in the throne room, Mike had Beth broker a new agreement with the rats. If they wanted to stay, they could, but they needed to close off any tunnels to the outside world that could be used to get in. The rats were hesitant to deny their request, particularly because Tink kept throwing everyone stink eye while holding her club and Mike held Jenny in his arms like a pet. The doll didn’t reanimate on the way back, but...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 11 Unwanted Company

She sat in the black sedan, watching the old, victorian era home across the street. Through the gate and the hedges, she could only make out the upper levels, replete with turrets and large, ornate windows. Inside that home, she knew would find her prey, but one problem remained. Of the many magical enchantments the house had, the most annoying of them all was that you had to be invited. They had bypassed this little detail with the succubus —using Mike’s blood had let them bypass the...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 14 Moonrise

Kisa sat on the roof of the house, her eyes locked on the wrought iron gate at the back of the property line. It had been over a week since Mike had gone through it and returned with the devil dog in tow. Despite his reassurance that Cerberus was no longer a danger to them, all she could picture in her mind was being chased through the misty woods by a fire breathing beast. Memories of her trip into the Underworld from so long ago had rushed in on her like ice water. She had fled from the...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 4 New Castle

The drive to the storage unit took over an hour. Staring at the fields on the edge of town, Beth couldn’t fathom why Emily would insist on a storage unit so far away from civilization, especially when there were several good ones within fifteen minutes of her home. “Fries,” she said, and Lily, acting as her copilot, held up the small red fry cup like an offering to the gods. Beth grabbed a few, stuffing them in her mouth carefully to avoid smudging her lipstick. They had grabbed a bite to...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 9 Caught in the trap

Water flowed through a crack in the wall. On the other side, Mike could hear the river. Placing his hands against the hard stone, he could feel the vibrations through it. Cupping his hands, he collected a mouthful of water and drank it. It was cold with a slight metallic taste, but Blue had informed him that it was safe enough to drink. “Is it good?” Blue asked from her perch on his shoulder. “It tastes like water,” Mike responded, sucking down huge mouthfuls. Wiping his mouth, he turned...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 4 Made of Stone

Mike yawned, the morning light through the white curtains casting a blissful glow on the room. He scratched the back of his neck, his foot kicking the lump near the bottom of his bed. He sat up, leaning forward to give the lump a playful pat. “It’s time to get up, Tink.” Mike watched the lump slide to the edge of the bed, disappearing over the edge with a thud. “Owie,” Tink muttered, standing up holding her bottom. She was wearing a tank top night shirt, one of the things Mike had ordered...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 13 In the Eye of the Storm

Mike realized his mistake as soon as it happened. Upon walking out the main entrance, they had stopped long enough for Beth to bid farewell to Asterion. The group all stood at the edge of the reflecting pool, their shortcut back to the house. When Beth rejoined them, Tink counted down from three and they all jumped in at the same time. That’s when Mike remembered that the magical shortcut would take them all to the downstairs closet. Not until the water soaked through his shoes did it occur...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 14 The Magician

They came again in the early hours of the morning, moving silently behind the outer wall. They triggered the wards Yuki had set, causing the kitsune to watch their approach through the window with bated breath. She could see them now, ominous shadows that peered over the wall and then vanished, gathering near the entrance for their next attack. Yuki had spent hours building her defenses back up, her mind and body tired from the effort, hoping to catch some sleep. Now, she watched with eager...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 13 The Tower

Mike’s heart pounded in his chest at the sight of the thing. The Jabberwock regarded the small group of people in its master’s home, then opened its mouth to let out a cry that made him think of a pterodactyl on steroids. Jabberwock saliva misted the entire room, and everyone covered their ears to shut out the cry. Daisy bolted, vanishing down the stairs and leaving a glittering trail behind her. Zel made a break for it, and the Jabberwock lunged for her, leaving a bloody gash in her...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 8 La Petite Mort

“Are we ready?” Mike asked. The others nodded, each one at their stations. Tink had tied Beth to a chair which had been placed in the fountain, standing behind her with a knife at the ready. Abella was out of sight, watching from up above in case everything went wrong. She had explicit instructions to do whatever it took to protect the members of the house. Naia stood behind Beth, her lips a crooked smirk. “We are ready.” Cecilia said, standing next to him. Mike took a deep breath, taking...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 5

Breakdown in Negotiations Mike pulled his shirt on in front of the bathroom mirror, Naia watching him from the tub. He could see the look of concern on her face, knew that the question was coming, and he had no idea how to dodge it. “Are you okay?” He let out a sigh. “No.” “Tell me.” He didn’t want to. He never wanted to talk about it with anybody. Yet, when he turned to face her directly, he remembered that she was the other part of his soul. She completed him in a way he couldn’t quite...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 9

The Fool The railing was smooth to the touch, as if it had been recently polished. She touched a knot in the wood, her fingers caressing the fractured ridges. Closing her eyes, she took in the smell of the place. The rich scent of oil, sawdust, and water from the fountain out back filled her with a swirl of nostalgia, causing her to inhale again, only deeper this time. So many old scents and a few that were new. Behind them all was the faint, faded scent of sunflowers and...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 4 Boxing Match

Sleep came for Mike, but it was far from restful. Unable to properly enter the Dreamscape again, he tossed and turned in his bed, his brain unwilling to let things rest. His first thoughts were on Cecilia. He could see her now, trapped inside a silver cage in the middle of a glen surrounded by waterfalls. Breaking the lock on the cage, he stepped inside—only to have her melt like wax in his arms and slide through holes in the floor. “Cecilia,” he cried out, her name slurring as if spoken in...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 7

Five Minutes Ago “You take me to the nicest places,” Beth said, stepping over a small, mossy rock. The world around them was dark, and the light from their cellphones poorly illuminated the forest floor. A breeze had formed as the cool, night air of Ireland blew through the portal into Mike’s front yard. The portal had been chewed into the inner wall of a crumbling home out in the woods, obviously long forgotten. “I do my best.” He stepped over a large rock and offered his hand when she...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 2

Roommate Trouble Beth sat at the large dining room table with a small plate of bacon, some coffee and a large plate with the remnants of a strawberry crepe. She scribbled a few more words on a notepad by her laptop, frowning at the list. “Any luck?” Sofia asked, walking in with her own breakfast. The cyclops took the seat across from Beth. A few of the seats in the formal dining room had been designed for larger people, allowing the cyclops to sit comfortably at the table. As far as Beth...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 11 Painful Memories

Kisa stood in the kitchen and scowled at the pantry door. How many times had she wandered in here and absent-mindedly opened it? At least three times a day, and now that she was here again, she had decided to look through the whole pantry and discover just what it was that she was looking for. Her missing memories really bothered her. She had just assumed that something would come back to her in the last few days, but all she got was static. Vivid images of the old man stirred something up...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 10

Seven of Swords Beth said very little to the minotaur as they climbed the trail to the top of the cliffs. She could tell he wanted to comfort her, but there weren’t words or deeds to make the situation right. Her plan was to speak with Naia and Sofia right away, to see if either of them could offer her any help. There were only a few days to make her decision, and she wouldn’t be able to live with any of her options. She remembered when she was little, her parents started arguing...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 5 Man in the Mirror

Beth tumbled gently to the floor beneath, flipping her body at the last second to land on her feet. Staring up, all she could see were the clouds she had passed through on the way down. She had several red marks on her left arm, each one from a nasty pinch that she gave herself to try and wake up from this strangest of dreams. Now that she was on the ground, she saw that she stood in a beautiful garden with a large marble gazebo in the middle. “How peculiar,” she said, expecting her voice to...

3 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 12 Welcome Home

Mike opened his eyes, staring at the waning sunlight through the canopy overhead. Scattered rays were dying, a sign that the sun was sinking toward the skyline, ready to slumber until the break of dawn. The forest was quiet – a complete lack of animals meant that the only sound Mike could hear was the occasional rippling of the leaves as the wind brushed them against one another. Lifting his head, he knew that he needed to get back. Though his slumber had been restless, he had clearly slept...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book OneChapter 2 A Swing and a Miss

“Whoa!” Mike splashed water everywhere in his haste to get out of the tub. This time, Naia didn’t fight him as he scrambled out into the bathroom, covering up with a towel. She pouted as he slid across the floor, looking for his pants. Seeing that she hadn’t moved from her spot in the tub, Mike felt his heart rate level out, the burst of adrenaline gone. “Who ... what are you?” He asked, trying to keep his eyes off of her breasts. Other than the strange markings on her ribs, her skin was...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 8 The New Girl

“Easy, kisa.” The familiar voice was thick with a Russian accent and elicited both feelings of warmth and sadness. It spoke to her from the void, guiding her back to the world of the living. The darkness peeled away to reveal a small dance studio with wooden floors and large windows overlooking a city. One of the interior walls was a mirror, and in the reflection was a young, black teen who sat on the floor, her face wracked with pain as an older man held her left leg in place while...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book ThreeChapter 8

The Hanged Man His chest was on fire and he couldn’t move. His limbs were super heavy and he couldn’t feel his legs anymore. Am I dying? Loud thuds like distant thunder beat in his chest and he thought he heard someone saying his name. His head cleared, and it occurred to him that he had looked onto the shores of the afterlife and they had looked nothing like this. A loud scraping sound filled his senses and he was suddenly blinded by a bright light and someone called his name. Oh shit....

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 8 Memories and Minotaurs

The sudden shift in time and position was immediately disorienting. One second, she was on the first floor of the Radley house, the world spinning around her. The next, she was running along a busted bridge, her legs not quite right beneath her. She tripped, colliding with someone else on the bridge, and they tumbled off together. Once she hit the cold water, her synapses fired all at once, restarting her brain and giving her full control. “Beth!” A hand swung out, grabbing her wrist, but...

2 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book FourChapter 6 In and Out

Up on the third floor, Mike contemplated the large set of double doors in front of him. The wall where the wardrobe used to be had been replaced with a slightly wider hallway that terminated after a few yards at a large pair of metal doors with a series of gears built into them. He tested the handle, but the door didn’t budge. Symbols were emblazoned across both doors with shapes that seemed astronomical in nature—he recognized the symbol for the moon and the sun, and the planet Mars, but...

4 years ago
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Home for Horny Monsters Book TwoChapter 14 Bigger on the Inside

“Ugh.” Mike held up a hand to shut out the sun’s light. It had been a late night trying to lay down all the new sod in the front yard. The lightning blasts and storm had killed off most of it, and only a few of the shrubs had survived. The delivery had showed up six hours late, and Mike and the others had to hastily unroll the sod beneath a scorching afternoon sun. Tink had crawled into bed with dirt on her hands and feet, her goggles pulled down over her neck. Mike had fallen asleep in his...

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POO MONSTERS

"Quick," he said, "grab the forty miles per hour sign." She bent down and felt around under her seat for the A3-sized placards that he had made up. She pulled them out and flipped through them, looking for the one he wanted. "Good grief, would you look at this idiot?" growled Michael. "Doesn't he know what a de-restricted sign means, for heaven's sake?" He changed down into third gear and cruised up to a few yards behind the bumper of the car in front, edging out towards the...

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World of Futa Monsters

Four figures were seen with each other, locked together by their hips and holding each other's thighs. They were clearly very voluptuous women with extra body parts below. In front was an orange haired werewolf getting anally reamed and jerked off by a vampire behind her while the vampire was being pounded by a dark skinned mummy. And said mummy was being pounded by a green skinned zombie woman of some sort. To the side of the orgy lied a human woman oozing and caked in cum. The monster women...

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Backyard PrincessChapter 2 Prisoner of the Shadow Monsters

That evening, Sarah stopped by and asked if we wouldn't mind coming over to meet her parents. Mom and I followed her across the way to her house. Her mom greeted us at the door and welcomed us inside. The smell of freshly baked cookies filled the house, and I spotted a plate of them on the coffee table in the living room. Her dad sat in one of the chairs. Mom and I sat down on the couch, and Mrs. Laurent took one of the other empty seats. Sarah passed around the cookies, then disappeared...

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I Kill Monsters

This story introduces two characters to the readers. I will bring them back every once in a while but this was the first time I used them they came to me as a result of a story written called Yukon by – well it does not matter. It is a continuation to a story "Yukon." A couple go to Yukon, wife is fucked silly by a scum bag monster of a man who has done it before to others; husband is forced to put up with it until he finally figures out a way to kill the monster. Wife tells him monster is...

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Sometimes Monsters Come In Small Packages

My name is Dr. Reginald  Alexander Ghurtholtz. I am a monsterologist, teaching monsterology at the world-famous Graveyard University. For those of you who don't know, monsterology is the study of monsters. Yes, they do exist. Of course, my so-called scientific colleagues disagree with me, but what do they know? They're just a bunch of chemists, biologists, zoologists and so forth. You know... voodoo scientists. They actually had the nerve to tell me that monsterology wasn't even a real word and...

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Monsters Of Cock

Monsters of Cock describes itself as “The biggest throat-clogging cock site in the world!” That’s quite a brag, either sexy as fuck or maybe a little bit intimidating, depending on who you ask. However, knowing the kind of absolute deviate you are, I’m sure you fall into the former category, and you’re probably already getting a hard-on as you think about little white chicks getting all full up on BBC. “Watch these girls cum from big cock!”MonstersOfCock.com is a long-running paysite from the...

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THE MONSTER Hello I'm Lisa and I'm going to tell you an story that is horrible that happened for 4 years ago when i was 24. in a little town i cant say name of but at that place something happened. All started when i was outside walking whit my friend kyle that is 2´7 years old one day. We were going to the shop in our little town it toke 5 minutes to walk. We were walking to the shop to meet Casandra She is 21 youngest of us 3.She were waiting there on...

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Thanks to Weirdo (John) for writing my Catgirl change. Halloween Tale: Monsters Are Real By Troy Monsters are real and I know it. How do I know it? Well that's easy. My friends and I are monsters. How did we get this way? It's a long story, but I'll tell you how it happened. There were six of us that night. Angel, Bill, Alec, John, Rena (who I always liked teasing about what I considered a girlish name), and myself had been told by our parents to go trick-or-treating for our...

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